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The Butterfly Mansion	By : Akuma Category: +G to L > Loveless Views: 5052 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Loveless, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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�� Soubi froze in the doorway, eyes glued to
the boy calmly reading a book on the sofa. But this time, it wasn�t the
innocent display of sensuality that earned his attention, it wasn�t the way the
over-sized shirt rode up to reveal the patch of skin he had worshiped many
times before, it wasn�t the way the mauve eyes focused to try make sense of the
words in the thick book.

�� Soubi,� Ritsuka greeted him when he noticed
his presence.

�� The soft voice shook Soubi out of his
stupor. He tried to calm himself, but failed. Fisting his hands slightly, he
strode over to the boy and knelt in front of him. Wordlessly, he pulled
Ritsuka�s right hand towards him, ignoring the brief look of surprise on the
boy�s face. He frowned slightly as he examined the bandage covering the wound
there.

� �What happened?� Soubi asked quietly.

�� Fury and concern raged inside him. The
intense feelings scared him, but he was unable to control them. Never in his
life had he ever been so overwhelmed by anger as he was at this very moment;
not when he was thrown away to the streets by his abusive parents, not when he
was raped by Ritsu, not when he was sent to his first client had he ever felt
such violent hatred. Soubi looked up to his young client, searching for answer
in his eyes.

�� I slipped while I was in the garden and my
hand got pierced by a branch.� Ritsuka answered, pulling his hand back. He
turned his eyes back to the book, appearing nonchalant about his injury.

� �I�m all right.�

�� Are you sure?� Soubi asked for confirmation.

�� Yes, I am.� Ritsuka answered, annoyed.

�� Soubi was no fool. He knew the wound couldn�t
have come from something as simple as a branch. From the way blood had slightly
seeped into the cloth, the wound must be pretty deep. Whatever had caused the
wound, it was very unlikely to be a simple branch.

�� Soubi wanted to press further, but remembered
Ritsuka�s annoyance earlier. Clearly, the boy was unwilling to share more and
Soubi didn�t want to upset him. It was a client�s right after all to keep his
private life secret. Soubi leaned forward to brush his lips against Ritsuka�s
uninjured hand and hid his troubled expression. �What would you like to do
tonight?� He asked for the umpteenth time.

� Ritsuka�s whispered answer and timid kiss no
longer surprised him, but the intensity of his own emotion as he kissed back
did. Soubi closed his eyes and vainly tried to ward away the hatred. It was
useless. His control always slipped away whenever Ritsuka was involved. He
hated it. He hated Ritsuka and how the boy had weakened him. In addition, he
wanted it. He wanted Ritsuka. He wanted how Ritsuka made him stop pretending to
be strong. Soubi was confused and lost and Ritsuka was only a small child
moaning in his arms.

� The wound on his hand wasn�t the only thing
Ritsuka hid from him, Soubi discovered in their sexual exploration. Ritsuka
kept pushing his hand away every time he tried to uncover more of his enticing
flushed skin, but Soubi managed to see the fresh red marks marring the slightly
exposed skin of his chest. He panted as he leaned down and denied the urge to
kiss them.

�� Who had done this to Ritsuka? What had he
done to warrant this? For all Soubi knew, Ritsuka was a kind child whose only
sin was perhaps his curiosity. How could anyone do this? How could anyone hurt
Ritsuka?

� Soubi paused mid-thrust, drawing a gasping
whine from Ritsuka, but he ignored it and took Ritsuka�s hand to kiss the blood
soaked bandage. Soubi closed his eyes to hide the anguish he could no longer
contain.

� �Soubi�� Ritsuka moaned out, wriggling his
hips slightly to urge Soubi to move.

�� Soubi let his hair cover his face as he
resumed his slow pace. �Ritsuka.� He whispered into the covered hand.
�Ritsuka... Ritsuka� Ritsuka�� He chanted along with Ritsuka�s pleasure induced
moans. He never despised his weak existence more than this moment.

*

�� Ritsuka was tiny and frail, and yet he fit
perfectly in Soubi�s arms. His bloody bandage felt cold against Soubi�s chest.
The overwhelming emotions stirred inside Soubi. There was anger, fear,
compassion, concern, hate� He was lost. The cool mask he had maintained for so
many years had easily cracked under the gentle fingertips of this boy.

�� Why did it feel so right? Why did it feel
like this was where he belonged? Why did he feel like here was where he must
remain, by Ritsuka�s side, forever? Why did he feel such a powerful urge to
make him happy, to protect him, to� to love him?

�� Soubi never knew love. He knew hatred,
anger, resignation, and even a little bit of contentment, but he never knew
love. There was no love on the streets, where the strongest survive and the
weak suffer until death. There was no love in what he offered to his other
client�s, only lust or an imitation of love at best. He never cared much about
love, he thought of it as a concept beyond his world. Until Ritsuka�

� Ritsuka made him feel again, made him human
again, as no one else ever could, Ritsuka entered his once frozen heart and
warmed it. The warmth frightened him. Soubi had never experienced anything near
this before. He cursed himself endlessly for losing his control whenever
Ritsuka was involved, but it was useless. The feeling wouldn�t go away no
matter how much he began to loathe himself. Yes, he had begun to loathe himself
and whoever had done this to Ritsuka, but he could never loathe the person who
made him into this weak being. He could never loathe Ritsuka.

� �Soubi?� Ritsuka called out softly, stirring
in his embrace.

�� A smile immediately and automatically formed
on Soubi�s face, but this time he wondered just how much it concealed. Could
Ritsuka see through him? Could Ritsuka see what he put him through? No, it
seemed. The boy stretched his body felinely, unaware of the lust radiating from
the blonde�s body and the emotion swirling in his mind.

� �Does it hurt?� Soubi asked, glancing toward
the bloody bandage.

�� Ritsuka brought up his hand for inspection.
An expression of indifference settled on his face, betrayed only by faint signs
of fear and sadness in his mauve eyes. �Not really.� He replied.

�� Soubi knew he lied, could feel it, sense it
in his soul. His heart ached for Ritsuka, because he knew that the boy tried so
hard not to feel. Despite having done just that most times in his life, Soubi
couldn�t help but think it was wrong. Ritsuka was only a child, he deserved to
be vulnerable, and he deserved to cry, to laugh, to feel, to be human, to be
what Soubi didn�t have the chance to be.

� �Ritsuka.�

� The boy looked at him with innocent
curiosity, oblivious to his swirling adult emotions. Soubi refrained from
leaning down to kiss Ritsuka and obey his desire again. Instead, he held
Ritsuka and brought it between them, as if to remind him of the line he must
not cross. He took a moment to assess Ritsuka, hoping the feeling �whatever it
was- would diminish and he wouldn�t have to do this, but if anything, it grew
stronger and stronger each passing second. Soubi could feel it eating away at
his fraying control, overwhelming him, winning his body, heart and soul.

� �Don�t ask for me again tomorrow.�

� A frown formed on the boy�s smooth forehead.
�Why?� He asked, slightly shifting away from his escort.� The betrayed look on Ritsuka�s face caused
more pain than Soubi thought possible. He swallowed back the ache and forced on
a smile. �Don�t you need to rest?�

Ritsuka opened his mouth to
say something, but then changed his mind, pulled his hand away, and turned his
back on Soubi. �Fine.�

� Soubi clenched his jaw, feeling guilty for
lying to Ritsuka. Was this the right thing to do? Should he take his words
back? No. He shouldn�t. He shouldn�t let himself become lost in the embrace of
the frail boy. He was an escort, an object, and an object does not feel.

�� Soubi draped himself over Ritsuka�s bare
back and reveled in the sweet scent and soft skin. Soon, it would have to be
pushed back to the back of his mind, sealed away forever. Soon, he must forget.
He couldn�t afford to be hurt, he couldn�t afford to give away what little was
left of his heart. �I�m sorry, Ritsuka.� He whispered.

� Ritsuka was silent for a while, but then
Soubi felt his hand lightly touched his arm. �It�s fine.� The boy replied
softly, kindly.

�� Soubi nodded and buried his face in
Ritsuka�s hair. This was the right thing to do. This was the best thing for the
both of them, but then why did it feel so wrong?
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The Butterfly Mansion