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400 Years Apart	By : Cynthermes Category: +M to R > Mirage of Blaze Views: 4238 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Mirage of Blaze and its characters solely belong to Kuwabara Mizuna. I’m just going to creep into a corner of her sand box and play the part of a wannabe historical writer. No profit has been made in the construction of this story.

Chapter List
- 41
- 42
- 43
Chapter 42:

An Interlude

Happyaku-nen Arc: The Other Side

A/N: Saburo Kagetora is not any happier witnessing his alternative ‘would-be’ life as Hojo ‘Saburo’ Ujitora.

…Did I say final arc? At least for the main storyline it is. But here is a MINI ARC once again. Also, thank you for the wonderful reviews you have given me so far.

This chapter contains: Religious and philosophical themes plus Minamoto no Yoshitsune’s story as the companion piece to Happyaku-nen Arc.

Warning: Violence, bestial behavior, sexual situations, explicit yaoi, INCEST, and character death. So if these elements offend you please DO NOT read.

…

Minamoto no Yoshitsune, the sun goddess Amaterasu’s current avatar, the ancient spirit currently trapped with Saburo Kagetora dared not approach the slumped figure lamenting against the Sakura Tree.

Shoulders shaking, distraught lines visible in the posture of his body… it was as if he begged the tree for answers.

For the first time, the guardian spirit was at a loss. Yoshitsune’s hesitancy and uncertainty showed his long-forgotten and non-omnipotent nature that resembled humanity.

“Tell me…” Saburo’s voice was no more than a weak nearly inaudible sob, “What is this that I see?”

Instead of taking a step forward, Yoshitsune instinctively backed away. He could feel rather than comprehend Saburo’s pain, confusion, and despair radiating in waves. Unsteadily, Yoshitsune tried, “Omniscience or all knowing wisdom always comes with the price of sadness. In contrast, ignorance makes mortal beings fortunate with happiness.”

“Stop,” Saburo stretched a quivering hand in the avatar’s general direction in a sort of warding-off gesture. “When will you stop talking in riddles? I need…” He bit his lip as if his weeping threatened to drown the words. “I need cruel honesty! I do not want sweet-laced lies!”

“Child,” The guardian spirit uttered as he would a plea. “If you want to be soothed, you need to tell me what upsets you.”

Saburo shakes his head, pushing himself to turn away from the tree. Dark amber eyes moistened with tears eventually meet Yoshitsune. “My dreams… your dreams, I do not understand.”

The piercing quality of that gaze is strikingly absent in his vulnerable, anguished state. Its haunting, heart-wrenching beauty endears Yoshitsune to finally go to Saburo. He wraps his arms around him like a parent embracing his offspring. “Say what hurts you so.”

“It’s… It is too much… pain. I cannot bear it. I do not… I cannot accept… how things could have ended in this way had I stayed.” Saburo clung to him fearfully, fretfully and in great desperation like he could be abandoned at any moment.

His hold was just as painful as was his suffering and Yoshitsune ignored the stinging sensation brought about by that distressed clawing. “I cannot accept that he… that he¹¹¹ would treat me this way! That I, that we could be family. It brings me agony, more overly so when I learned of such a possibility.”

“Child, do you speak that discovering your blood kin, your true family had or would have loved you causes you immeasurable torment?” Yoshitsune attempts to rephrase those nonsensical words.

“Yes,” Fine brow creasing, Saburo breathed in response. “Why…? Why could things be so different? I have long accepted he hated me that every single one of them did not care more about me than they would protect their self-serving interests.”

Yoshitsune cradled that lovely troubled face with his hands. “Saburo, you have to ask yourself first why you made such a wish before Lake Ashi. For is this not what you wanted to see: This fragment of truth that could never happen because circumstances had been different in reality? That is why some things are best left unknown. You, more than anyone should realize that this has been the folly of humans for as long as they have lived.”

Saburo happened upon the melancholic light reflected in Yoshitsune’s luminescent eyes. Could it be that this ancient spirit harboured the same pain? The same suffering as he endured now?

“Is it not easier to bear the thought of dying when you believe that you will leave little regrets and abandon none? Therefore, if there are more who hated you or did not care about you, would you not be more eager to depart? On the other hand, when you have people who love you and cry for you, would not passing away be more difficult?” As Yoshitsune said this, he drove the wedge of sorrow deeper into Saburo’s heart.

Saburo Kagetora’s eyes squinted in terrible, terrible ache and a choked-up wail almost burst out. All at once, the events that led to his entrapment here from his ominous wish upon the dormant beast of Lake Ashinoko, to his soul’s disconnection to Takaya’s— his body, his separation to Naoe, to his shared and continuing visions with Yoshitsune and up to the very dreadful idea of spending his eternity here… never to see Naoe again and the rest of his friends, the Yashashu, Miya, his sister and his impending demise never made perfect clarity until it was spelled out for him.

His ensuing sadness crystallized into that of stark fear. Widening set of amber quickly conveyed the emotion in its most naked form. It awoke Yoshitsune’s protectiveness as if Saburo were his own. “No, do not despair. Have more faith, Saburo.”

Saburo Kagetora hid his doubts and qualms against a strong bosom. “Our dreams are about to end. When that happens what shall become of us? Aside from being haunted forever by the memory of my aniue what other outcome awaits me?”

Yoshitsune starts at these questions. Has the younger one sensed his own insecurities... his own fears? ‘Musa would come… he would come… No, your Naoe would find a way. I am sure of it. But shall I say that we cannot do anything but wait? Wouldn’t that be a display of weakness?’

“Yoshitsune?” Saburo, who glances innocently up at him had never looked so young despite four centuries of existence. This neither makes him superior nor any different regardless of his elder years.

Yoshitsune shakes his head. He was the avatar of Amaterasu, the Taiyou-no-Kami. It had been his role to guide and to show human souls the consequences of their foolish quest to overcome ignorance. “Saburo, it has never been the prerogative of mortal beings to know their fate. It destroys their will of living life to the fullest. Humans’ limited understanding and sometimes skewed principles do not make them suitable for vast amounts of truth or knowledge. Did the Buddha not teach that the source of all human suffering is the mind itself?”

The pliant appearance twists once more into an aggrieved face. Fat droplets of tears fall one after another down fair cheeks. “I know… and yet I do not understand. If you would live a doomed existence then would it not be better to have never lived at all?” Saburo wept brokenly.

“It is like comparing one who was born blind to another who was blinded by injury and having a discourse about the sun’s magnificence. Who do you think of the two suffered a greater feeling of loss?” Yoshitsune’s voice had gentled though he had looked ever forlorn.

And when Saburo only bestowed him a hopelessly confused stare, Yoshitsune spoke, “Tis the one born blind. He would not see for himself the soft brightness or the glaring intensity of the sun. And though the other one would reminisce and the memory brings only sadness, his pain is genuine proof to have experienced the joy and grief of living. Humans live for the moment. This finite existence makes life more precious, more treasured than any other being alive.”

“Then would it not be the same about ignorance and wisdom? Won’t humans be humans without the thirst to know perhaps and mayhap?”

The guardian spirit was only mildly startled when Saburo seemingly flipped their dialogue to his favor.

“Living and knowing are two distinct aspects. Humans live to know. If they know everything beforehand, they will not live. They will not protect, cherish, love, and sacrifice themselves for the most significant thing in their lives. Their limitation to knowledge and weaknesses in the face of tragedies and loss push them to value what little they have and to regret their mistakes. Their vulnerabilities inspire them to change for the better or the worse. They make a person choose how to live in this world.”

“So if humans would know their fate then everything would be for nothing. They would strive to change only to create mountains more of mistakes on their path because they would not regret.” Saburo finished with a realization that did not give him the slightest relief. Knowing is indeed different from accepting, doing, living…

“Truly, well said.” Yoshitsune’s voice almost cracked as he pulled the younger one’s head closer to his chest. He did not want Saburo to see the emotion that threatened to unravel him though he knew it was more than felt by the other.

That is why I will not tell you that He, my brother Susano-o is coming… Yoritomo, Aniue is coming…

XxXMOBXxX

(1)

I hastily refill my cup uncaring if my prior helping of substandard sake burned my throat. Resting on the wooden floor of our current shelter with hair half undone and crusted with dirt and blood, I sat with my upper body exposed. My yamabushi* clothes were torn and needed mending yet moving about let alone walking was still difficult for me. The deep purple bruises decorating my torso, the little nicks and cuts on my skin were only half the truth of what I had been through just a quarter of a day ago¹¹².

*Mountain monk

And I thought to myself, there was no better way of forgetting what happened by drowning in cheap liquor. It was all I could do now as I was reduced to a wandering vagabond to protect my life and identity.

As I shakily tilt the clay dish to my scratched lips, a large hand steadies my wrist. “Ease on the drinking, Waka*.”

Musashi-bou Benkei could not even meet my unyielding gaze as he pries the cup off my fingers and sets it down. It seems he has returned with a bucket of more warm water, a bowl of salve, and fresh gauze. A crease starts on my forehead: a sign of my impending displeasure. He sighs despite my ire. “Benkei was only gone for a moment and then he finds Master* wasting away in dreadful substance. As your guardian, I will not allow you to taint yourself with such low quality sake.”

“Musa,” Admonishing, cold, authoritative… I cannot help it. He has pricked my anger yet again. “I do not have long, wide, open cuts. What will you need those bandages for, fool? All I need is to soothe the pain and I have what I needed right here.” I nearly shove the jar against his face. Temper has gotten the better of me these days.

He remains kneeling dutifully as he sponges my chest to wash the grime of a week’s journey on foot. “The bandages will keep you warm and would cushion the bruises. It will also help prevent your muscles to strain too much.” His closed hand drips water near my scarred shoulder and he pauses, knows it is uncharted, forbidden territory.

“Imbecile.” I snarl. “I have survived far worse than this. How can you think your beating could incapacitate me? Do not think so highly of yourself-” I was barely finished with my tirade when I heard a hitch of breath. Instantly, I pale at the sound of his weeping.

“Forgive me. Not even in the depths of my soul do I wish to hurt you.”

I ended up wiping frantically at tears that refused to abate. “Enough, you have said so already. It is unbecoming of a man your stature and skill to be crying continuously over some silly matter.”

“Stop,” He said suddenly and caught both my elbows in a firm clasp. “The salt in my tears might get into your wounds and cause you more pain.”

I shake my head. What was this insolent creature spouting about? “Musa, unhand me. Since when have I been such a frail thing?” I tried to pull away but to no avail.

He does not let go but at least his tears slowed to a trickle. However the chilling expression that soon emerged made the hairs of my arms to stand on end. I have yet to remember that I deal with a formerly vicious rogue. “You are indeed frail. Have you forgotten that night when streaks of blood flowed down your legs?”

I drew a sharp intake of breath. Any semblance of color left my face.

How dare he make me remember!

Does he not know better than to strike at my vulnerabilities? My outraged countenance daunts him; it dulls his sharp edge. The war giant in him sleeps again and the beginnings of moisture collect at the rims of his eyes. I had never envisioned him as capable of showing such emotion and certainly not before me. It had its way of beguiling me to appeasement.

I linger at the brink of considerable calm.

“Speak plainly. Tell me what is it that you hope to achieve with this childish fit?”

“I want to dress your wounds… all of it.”

Ah, I knew it. The demon finally revealed its true self.

“All of my wounds…? The wound there has healed if that is what you are after.” I said none-too-modestly.

Do I see a slight fluster in his demeanor? It must be my imagination combined with the dubious effects of alcohol.

“…here.” He caressed my marred shoulder before I could protest, much less flinch. His disturbing warmth made me feel more feverish than I already was. His fingers trace the bite mark over the faded scar and I shivered.

Trapped.

No way out.

Subdued?

That was where I found the strength to stand and push him bodily away.

I grit my teeth at the rebounding ache. I will be damned if I let a sound of pain leave me.

At this, I find a smile curling my lip. “You have not reached that place of me…” yet.

He hung his head but resumed washing my body. He could never touch me… touch it again, my only corporeal memento of that man.

Of Minamoto no Yoritomo…

(2)

Being at the receiving end of such warm welcome, I did not know if I should feel relieved or be all the more wretched for it. I was not any more proud of meeting the eyes of my benefactor and adoptive father than I had been standing before Minamoto no Yoritomo during our first reunion. In both occasions I have felt displaced, like I was a nuisance trying to impose myself on their good graces or that I was a poor waif relying on their mercy to take me in as their own.

For having returned to Fujiwara no Hidehira meant only one thing: I was abandoned, cast away and therefore houseless, nameless, and worthless. I was once again, Shana-ou¹¹³ the wild tengu of Kurama Mountain.

I was not prepared for the warm hand that grasped my chin. “For all that you have done for the Genji; it saddens me to see you in this state, Yoshitsune.” Hidehira-dono’s penetrating stare notes with transparent disapproval: the raggedness of my clothing, the dirt clinging to my face, and the general shabbiness of my appearance like the unkempt rustiness of a sword. “What coldness of heart does the Kamakura Shogun possess to have rewarded his very own brother in this manner? When he himself would not have gained such control over the land let alone earned so many victories if not for your efforts, Yoshitsune?”

The brittleness of his voice threatened to strip the last vestige of my composure and it was the least thing I needed to stay sane: his pity. “Hidehira-dono, stop…” I was almost unable to rectify myself and I lowered my voice into a whisper, “Forgive me of my impudence but I do not wish this to be discussed so candidly in the open. It would do no good for your subjects to hear any misdeeds from the new supreme ruler of Japan.”

I nearly stammered at the disbelieving look he gave me so I forced myself to continue, “I am not contradicting your views, Your Honor. I am merely concerned of the several dispositions of your household about the matter.”

His brows drew painfully together but he graced me a sad smile of admiration and I felt the tension around the room gradually dissipate. “Please lad, address me as your adoptive father and do forgive my insensitivity. You must be very tired and hungry from your gruelling trip. It belatedly dawned on me what an ungracious host I am.” He gave a light-hearted chuckle to further dispel the gloom that went with my arrival at his court. With a casual wave he sought someone among the audience. “Yasuhira, kindly escort Yoshitsune and his companions to a spacious chamber at the East Wing—”Hidehira-dono suddenly hunched over and if Musashi-bou (who promptly ran to my side) and I had been slower to catch him, Lord Fujiwara would have collapsed to the floor.

I was quickly struck by the pale hue of his face and the uncharacteristic wideness of his eyes. “Ah, my apologies,” Hidehira said with thinly concealed difficulty and pushed himself back upright. “My advanced age must be getting to me. I felt tired without warning.”

“Chichiue,” Yasuhira called with undertones filled with enough worry to make anyone surmise that something was very wrong with his father.

Lord Fujiwara fixed his son and heir a stern gaze. “Do not fret over me. Pardon me once again Yoshitsune but I am afraid I must retire early. Still as promised, my son Yasuhira will accompany you.” He reassured with a tone as hard as steel that brooked no room for argument.

…

When we were given our living quarters and left to our privacy, Musashi-bou did not wait to voice his disquiet. “Waka, we must not stay here for long. As I see it, Fujiwara Hidehira-dono is very ill. Our presence could only stir unrest within his followers thinking we are added weight to their burden.”

Again with the uncanny place and time for his austerity…! I turn on my heel to face him and sneered, “And where else do you suggest we go? Do you propose we act like ingrates and turn our backs on our venerable host the moment we find out about his infirmity?” I almost strike him and I did not know what held me back: the readiness of his posture to take it or the nude truth gleaming in his eyes. I tried to avoid him altogether.

“Waka, I am only after your safety. I would not deny that I am one of those who suggested we seek refuge in Oshu but I would not think twice of venturing further north if that is what it takes to protect you.” Musashi-bou replied, unrepentant.

“Head further north? And what shall we achieve in doing that? And what exactly are you protecting me from?” I muttered distractedly. It got a rise out of him. He strode forward and grasped my upper arms.

“Have you sunk so deep in your delusions? Your brother will stop at nothing to completely annihilate you! He might be plotting to go to war with the Northern Fujiwara Clan even as we speak. And here, with Hidehira-dono weakened as he is will not be able to hold out against Minamoto no Yoritomo’s forces.” If this impertinent oni* thinks he has all the rights to decide and act what he believes is best for me then he had another thing coming.

“Get your filthy talons off me, demon*. And how dare you utter my brother’s name as if he were a common man. I will see to my affairs alone! I command you not to overstep your boundaries, or have you forgotten your oath to me?” My caustic remark resulted in his brief falter but after many instances of not succumbing to my provocations, it appears I shall fail in pacifying his inner brute today.

I scarcely realized what has happening until my back hit the matted floor and his enormous weight pinned me in place. “Why are you being so obstinate?” He licked my lip and left moist trails down the curve of my neck. That was when I knew fear.

I snapped my teeth but he only smirked slyly at me.

“You insufferable cur! What turns you into this, this vile piece of—”

“And yet you need ask? Is it not you who forgets just what kind of beast I am? You might have tamed me in the past but you have neglected in maintaining the tight chain around my neck. You think yourself high and mighty enough to survive any form of danger but look at how helpless you are before me. I am doing everything to uphold your honor but you do nothing but chase the shadow of your wicked half-brother!”

Things turned uglier at that point.

“Oh, did I hear that right, Saito Musashi-bou Benkei? You want a reward for your explicit loyalty? Or do you want to *beat me again like how you thoroughly enjoyed while you were at it?” I myself did not know what propelled these thoughtless, cruel words out of my mouth. All I knew was the elation of seeing him tremble once again in my presence and power though I equally dreaded the rough pressure of a massive object straining against my thigh.

But stung by the daggers in my speech, he heaved himself off me faster than I could blink. “Master, I often and dearly fail to remember that you ARE indeed his brother. Although he threw you away, you cling to his memory like he and you were one, personified. Even now, I see him in you. And there is nothing more that frightens me than losing you in this way.” After Benkei imparts me his bitterness, he silently leaves and I am once more at a loss for words, in thought, and bereft of company.



(3)

Since our last argument, Benkei very rarely showed himself to me though I constantly sensed his presence. It did my delicate frame of mind no favors since I felt my increasing isolation clash with my baser instincts screaming at a nearby invader of my privacy. I had enough concerns withering my nerves away do I really need a bothersome shadow that always put me at the tip of my toes? Though it did more good than bad to maintain my Ki highly attuned to my surroundings, it placed unnecessary taxation on my part.

This was not the first time Musashi-bou retreated to the darkness and employed unorthodox measures to “watch over me.” He had predominantly behaved in this way when I lived in the Kamakura Estate under the very residence of the Minamoto Clan Head himself. Is he doing this again to remind me of those times? Or is this his method of placid rebellion? Nevertheless, I have never felt more alone than before.

Most of my retainers and closest friends have been either killed or lost in my daring escapes and confrontations against relentless pursuers waving the banner of Yoritomo. Musashi-bou is one of the few surviving companions that followed me all the way from Kurama-dera. To have him this cold and distant to me is unbearable. Yet I can do nothing but endure for I cannot give what he dared ask of me.

At one period of my life, if given sufficient nurturing to mature, my heart would have belonged to him had I stayed as young, innocent, willful Shana-ou. But that was not to be for it was never written in the stars as my mentor¹¹⁴ would have phrased. My fated return to the Genji had sated all my utmost desires yet at the same time my flight also left everything I had behind… including a forbidden ache that ate a hole at the center of my chest.

Late in the evening I tried to drift off ignoring the disturbing sensation of being watched intently. And I had not known I fell asleep until I was filled with vivid dreams; fiery memories of one particular night.

**

I know I could not keep this up for long. The moment all opposition vanished toward Yoritomo including that of the Cloistered Emperor I have contemplated my self-appointed exile in Kyoto as the least favorable circumstance to wait for the end. Yet I never expected that only in a matter of days, he would boldly come himself to intervene…

Since it was the anniversary of our father’s death, Kyoto was declared a neutral ground and no one dared to start conflict. Hence, Minamoto no Yoritomo’s advance was met with no opposition.

Irritably snatching at the curtains concealing me as if he were actually tearing it, Yoritomo strode forward with an exposed katana in hand, “I heard you were very ill but I was right not to believe so. Feigning sickness; have your intelligence dwindled into that of a monkey’s or are you merely insulting mine?”

I did not dare turn to face him. Seeing him will only shake my resolve. It would make me believe his intentions were not to cause me harm. And yet he simply needed to utter one name and my stubborn defenses crumbled, “Ushiwaka!”

My wide-eyed gaze met twin smoldering orbs of fire. He had cast his sword aside and his hands latched into my clothing… he clung to me wearing a look somewhere between absolute fury and longing.

No! I yelled at myself. Do not be fooled!

In my denial I had completely missed the sad, yearning that briefly crossed his features.

Gritting my teeth I tried to shake him off but he steadfastly held me. As I still struggled wildly, he forced me to kneel on the floor and succeeded baring my shoulders. My robes slid off my body against my wishes and he readily took advantage.

His tongue caressed my scar, my weakness and to my shame I immediately reacted. I trembled and bit my lip to stop myself from moaning. He laughed quietly in tones filled with allure that I cursed myself inwardly. How could I have carelessly told him the significance of this mark? Now he will not think twice of exploiting it to make me surrender.

As he had not fully achieved his desired response, he lavished the raised skin with thorough attention working his mouth in such a way that made my legs weak and the spot in between to throb but he was yet to coax a sound out of me.

“Ushiwaka, I never imagined that even in exile you still have the gall to resist me.” His low rumbling whisper made me as tense as cornered prey. And when he teased the shell of my ear with his teeth I almost whimpered.

Something must be detrimentally wrong.

How could I let him affect me?

And when realization struck, I felt like hitting myself. It was a grave mistake to let this man near me in the first place. Had I not learned enough in the past that I was no match for his exceptional skills of seduction?

While I was distracted by my thoughts, his sinful lips continued their path from my shoulder towards my unprotected neck. He nuzzled me, inhaled my fragrance, and made salacious noises that would fluster the most experienced courtesans. Yoritomo suddenly chuckled. “Have you not wisely deduced that your defiance spurs me? Behaving in this way... is this how you intended to lure my sword to your sheath?”

I gasped in shock.

Such poorly veiled lechery! I was unaware that he could speak in a terribly scandalous manner.

My expression caused him to laugh some more. Was this a game to him and I, his plaything? My eyes narrowed, I tried moving away but he used his broader body to imprison me; to hinder my escape. I would not put up with this any longer! With all my strength I shoved him hard.

He almost lost his balance but his anger and determination kept him on his feet. I stormed off but he swiftly chased after me. Before I could reach the door, he forcibly grabbed me and ruthlessly bit my shoulder. I staggered, crying out but Musashi-bou was not there to help me. The gods must have conspired for my misfortune if they planned to send my protector away in my time of need.

Swallowing my tears I reached for a weapon that was not there. I thrice cursed my idiocy for trying to run naked, unarmed, and with no guardian to rely on.

Losing my will to fight, I let Yoritomo throw me down the palette of my bed. He climbed on top of me and pinned my wrists above my head. I hardly cared but when he saw moisture clouding my eyes, his brow furrowed as if in anguish. “Ushiwaka,” He brokenly called to me and started weeping himself, which confounded me.

Yoritomo wrapped his arms around me, held me, and murmured incoherent words of apology or regret. When his tears stopped, a miserable visage remained etched on his face. I still could not understand the power behind his emotions or his seemingly volatile behaviour.

The significance of this moment was lost to me. So many rifts had come between us that it was hard to tell truth from lies. But one thing was clear. His family sees me in a different light. I was no more welcome to set foot in his house than I was a stranger or a thief. My reluctance deepened the worry lines on his face. He appeared aggrieved, and more exhausted than I had seen him in all our years together.

It moved me; it affected me and connected to me like no perfectly articulated words can.

Sitting up, I drew his awkward, tormented form towards me and he gave a soothing sigh, lowering my guard. Yoritomo settled himself on the crook of my neck and I thought the worst was over.

I could never have been more wrong.

He sank his teeth deeper into my wound and I arched up, reflexively clenching my jaw in awful pain. Eyes watering at the sting, I shakily demanded, “What… are you…?”

“Ah! Uh…! Stop…” My strength was wavering and I could barely push him away as he ate at me.

He gradually raised his head, blood smearing the corners of his mouth and in a flash his expression was akin to a wild beast relishing its meal. I was stunned. Has this man lost his mind?

Yoritomo took advantage of my lapse and undressed. He then lowered his face and innocently suckled at torn flesh. He did not injure me for a third time but the bleeding persisted. I was so transfixed at his display of bestiality that I dared not move.

A line of red dripped down my chest and his lips hungrily followed. His pursuit ended on a blood-tipped nipple, which he licked delicately before treating it with more vicious lust.

Fisting the sheets, I keened softly as he sucked and tasted me. Had I known that my shameless sounds further robbed him of reason and brought him quickly to the heights of intense arousal, I would have readily smothered my desires.

As he sensually nipped my other breast, my eyes closed tightly in pleasure. I failed to catch his predatory smile and only heard his husky purr of appreciation. It was the sole warning I get before large warm hands slide up and down my thighs. Their vile intentions were as plain as day.

Before I knew what was happening, the interior of the room spun and I suddenly found myself on the naked lap of Yoritomo. His warm breath stirred the tiny hairs of my back and I shivered. “Prepare yourself,” He whispered to my skin as if it were an intimate threat. “Even if you beg and cry I will not let you go until I have embraced you enough to satiate my need.”

I feared eventually submitting to his sexual wiles and becoming forever entangled in his viscous trap that I was eager to flee at all costs.

“No! Stop this madness!” To deter my violent thrashing, a strong arm coiled around my waist holding me firmly in place while his sly hand was touching me everywhere on my torso, squeezing my hardened nubs, praising the firmness of my abdomen before sneaking at the center of my hips and fondling my waking member.

I was sadly manipulated to do his bidding: squirming and writhing restlessly against him. It made me look more obscene and depraved in his licentious gaze. “Stop… Mmn! Ah…!”

His heated lips brushed a prominent vein on my neck as if to pacify me.

“Fear not.” Yoritomo reassured. “I will thoroughly take good care of my Ushiwaka.” Not losing his grip on me, he reached somewhere under his discarded robes. He raised a tall phial of oil, which glistened in the candle light. In liberal amounts he coats himself and mine on both ends.

Against my will, I was stiff as his manhood was engorged and my entrance thoroughly prepared and stretched. Earlier, he had resorted to making me orgasm twice using the devious talents of his fingers and mouth.

As a result, it extinguished the fight I had reserved to contest him.

My defeat left me winded and breathless: a pliant slave to Yoritomo who finally decided to have me.

Entering me all the way until he bestowed me the lewd sensation of fullness, he meticulously stroked my sensitive spot until the fire in my loins threatened to consume me. “Oh…! Oh…! I can’t… Ngh!” It was more than I could take. I mewled, grinded my pelvis harder into his and hoarsely cried out uncaring if Benkei himself were to discover my wantonness.

Driven by my burgeoning need, Yoritomo rubbed me silkily in tandem with his thrusts. “Ah… Ah! Ah…! Auh!” I had no way of restraining myself as the delirious ecstasy stabbed me repeatedly. I thought I was teetering to the edge when he pulled out in the middle of our coupling and positioned me on all four limbs.

In my surprise I could only quaver at the weight of my sweaty limbs, my pulsating sex and stared at him wide-eyed.

His smile was as wicked as ever. “That is right, Love. I want to take you like an animal.”He growled, pressed me harshly down the futon and mounted me from behind.

Without a shred of modesty or decency I presented him my ripe and full rump while I breathed raggedly in anticipation.

My passion overflowed when he takes me without restraint and started to erratically pound at me like we were mating beasts in heat.

Stimulating my heavy sac and my insides as well, he pushed me towards release. My walls clutched him as I wailed, hurling rough groans as my belly spasm and eruptions of seed wracked my body. I was already down and senseless before Yoritomo achieved rapture and flooded me with his warm, sticky essence.

I remember telling him to let go, to allow me a bit of rest. But his member did not soften and instead it swelled almost merging with my flesh. Panic started to set in me but he only laughed. “My Ushiwaka, have I not told you that I will not let you go? In this way, we will never be separated until I am satisfied. My organ will remain inside until I tire of making love to you, which is impossible.”

His sinister voice and the unending intercourse was the only world I knew behind my shifting eyelids.

**

“Tsune— Yoshitsune-sama!” I wake abruptly only to face the worried countenance of my servant.

Benkei who does not seem to have the slightest clue that he was currently straddling me, with his monk’s black robes and thick hair tickling my skin notices my flustered expression but makes no move to get off me.

Soon he would discover the depraved state of my body that carried lingering traces of my potent dream. Turning to my side, I tried to unseat him and hide my arousal by folding my legs. “Will you calm down? I am not in danger. It was only a nightmare so you could make yourself scarce.”

“But you were yelling Yoritomo-dono’s name in your sleep! I thought he has come to ambush you. The sounds you made… it seemed as if you were being murdered that Musashi-bou rushed to your side.”

Listening to Benkei’s terse explanation, I did not know whether to laugh, to bristle in anger or to die in embarrassment. ‘Yoshitsune, how dare you at this advanced age have a perverse dream about your aniue?’ I want nothing more than to be alone. “So it is the horrible noise of my death that finally drew you out from the shadows.”

Musashi-bou shakes his head still unwilling to part from me. “This servant has learned his lesson. I will let Master see that I am always here to rely on.”

I felt like hitting my head in a bottle of sake, which I could use some right now. “Benkei, before Yoritomo even gets to swing at me, you would have crushed my lungs under your weight.” And with these wry phrases, the monk finally has the wit to scramble off me.

“My apologies,” He bows deeply. “Does the Master wish for a cup of hot tea to soothe his nerves?”

Avoiding his keen, earnest gaze I nod once to send him off: anything to get rid of him at the moment.

When I hear the shoji slide firmly shut, I stare at the opposite door leading to the private gardens. It was still dark outside but I knew it must be dawn judging from the change in temperature. Nonetheless, my body felt overheated and I knew that the best way to get rid of the ache was to deal with it. Stalking away from the bedroom as silently as I could, I stepped into the early morning air and after exercising discretion I let my sleeping garment pool at my feet.

Uttering the quietest of moans I stroked myself replaying the scenes in the dream and selecting its flaw, which entailed Yoritomo preparing me to take him as well. Remembering how I made love to him over and over, the pressure in my groin vanished.

Heaving a sigh of relief, I was completely unaware of the pair of slanted eyes drinking in the sight of my abandon.

(4)

Early in the cold autumn daylight, a disturbance in the suzerain’s main residence alerted me and Musashi-bou. Servants and bushi rushed about and that was when we learned that my benefactor, Fujiwara no Hidehira collapsed suddenly once again while taking his leisurely stroll in his gardens. Before I expressed my wish to see his condition, Yasuhira-dono was already waiting for us in the hall.

Although his face was grim there was a strange glint in his eyes that would have unnerved even a highly composed warrior. I felt I was being scrutinized too eagerly that Benkei immediately drew himself to his full height and pressed himself closer to me. I repressed the urge to roll my eyes at his overprotective behavior. “Musashi-bou, do I need to remind you to refrain from walking ahead of your master?” I warned under my breath.

Yasuhira-dono who easily overheard loosens his rigid posture, “Pardon me. Yoshitsune-dono, my father hopes to speak with you alone. He is currently lying on bed and cannot move without assistance. Your retainer,” Hidehira’s heir tossed Benkei a disapproving look when my stubborn servant refuses to relinquish his post. “…can stand guard outside.” He finished and turned his back on us when he opened the shoji*.

“Stay,” I ordered coldly.

Crossing the threshold, a sudden chilly gust blew lifting a few wisps of my hair. If I had turned just a little, I would have witnessed Musashi-bou’s fingers extending and then slipping through the strands as I stepped out of reach.

When the doors* were finally closed, servants offered me the sitting mat at the suzerain’s right side while Yasuhira already made himself comfortable by taking his place directly across from me on the left of his father.

With just one glance from his reclined form, anyone could see that this frail, gaunt, and withered old man did not have much time in this world.

I lowered my eyes in distress. This man was someone who was partially responsible in raising me. When I came of age, instead of persuading me to stay and support him, he readily allowed me to reunite with my blood clan. And after I came running back to him as a fugitive, he had no qualms about welcoming me and protecting me as he had before. He was the closest thing I have to an indulgent father and I as a son not only brought him failure but also put his entire household in danger.

A cold wrinkled hand lifted up to rub my cheek. “Do not cry, Yoshitsune. That is not what I shall ask of you to do for me.” Uncaring how Yasuhira thought of this scene, I covered his hand with mine and unable to help myself continued to shed silent tears.

Hidehira-dono sighed and shook his head. “Aye, look at the overgrown child nestling my palm.”

Choosing not to disappoint him further, I fought to get a hold of my emotions. “What can Yoshitsune do for Hidehira-dono?”

“I want you to play the flute for me.” This request caught me by surprise. “It has been a very long time since I heard your magnificent talent that only a few know of. Do not tell me it has rusted when you were in the Genji army?”

“But I…”

Guessing my concern correctly, he motioned for his son who was as dumbfounded as me to reveal a wooden piece beneath his sleeves.

Hesitantly accepting the instrument from the stiff fingers of Yasuhira, I could no longer deny the pain that struck my gut. This part of me was the only one untouched by Yoritomo. It was untainted innocence, my safe and forbidden haven I dare not sink into during those troubled times with the Genji. But here, in the company of Hidehira I can play to my heart’s content. Gratefully placing the mouthpiece over my slightly parted lips, I took a deep breath and weaved melodies in the crisp morning air.

The effect of my free-flowing music was profound. It chilled the bones of my listeners, pulled at their heartstrings, and destroyed any semblance of reserve. It had the ability to lay one’s soul bare. Hidehira-dono once commented that my ability could permeate the most hard-skinned of men and lay their defenses to waste comparable to the legendary grace of the mountain tengu.

“Ah, I am glad that your skill has not dulled a bit. It makes me fear death no longer.”

I stopped but he gestured for me to carry on.

Midway of my third piece, I unwittingly turn my attention towards the person who sat directly opposite mine. Yasuhira was deliberately studying me, almost unblinkingly that the disconcerting feeling I had of his previous scrutiny was brought back twofold. I refused to be intimidated and met his stare dead on. His lip twitched and he soon dropped his gaze.

When I finished with a pure resonating note, Hidehira’s eyes shone with determination. “Wonderful. Thank you, Yoshitsune.” As he praised me, he commanded the servants to help him in a sitting position, to prepare steaming tea and delicacies for us to enjoy. Afterwards, he told the servers and guards to vacate the area.

Yasuhira was obviously against it but he had no say against the suzerain’s decisions.

“O-Musuko¹¹⁵ has no cause for worry; my body only craves sleep. Please allow me to skip the formalities. Yasuhira, both you and I know that I am old and could no longer fulfill my duties as the suzerain therefore, from now on I appoint you as my successor.”

Yasuhira’s face became taut but he obediently kept his silence.

“Minamoto no Yoritomo, the Kamakura Shogun is undeniably the rising ruler of Japan and his ambitious goals will not spare Oshu in his conquest for dominance. But even in death I am unwilling to let him dream of taking our land. There is only one general who could oppose him.” Hidehira’s eyes momentarily rested on me before addressing the new suzerain once again. “Fujiwara no Yasuhira, I want you to promise me that you will support Yoshitsune until the very end.”

Yasuhira chose not to speak for a while. If he defies his father’s wishes I would be left to fend for myself but I honestly could not fault him. Who am I to deserve such generosity: a harbinger of peril?

Yet in the end he gives his assent, “Fujiwara no Yasuhira promises his lord and father to consider Yoshitsune-dono as a brother and comrade. I vow to support him as he agrees to protect Oshu with everything he had.”

After exchanging oaths and sharing a meal, we were about to leave when a hidden door slid open and a young juvenile literally bounded towards us.

“Aniue!”

Yasuhira rubbed his temples and shushed this nuisance. “Yorihide, where are your manners? Aniue is unhappy that you act with discourtesy and disrupt Father’s rest.”

The lad who to me appears no older than sixteen bows apologetically. “Please forgive Yorihide. But I was just amazed hearing Aniue play so beautifully that I thought my heart would burst! He has greatly improved— no he could be a master already!”

“Yorihide…” Yasuhira gnashed his teeth while I had a hard time keeping a straight face. “It is not Aniue who you heard with the flute but Yoshitsune-dono.” His flat tone was not meant to please.

Nevertheless, Yorihide’s eyes sparkled as they landed on me. “Yorihide has heard Lord Father speak remarkable things about Yoshitsune-dono but being an excellent flutist and having a face that ladies of the imperial court would pine for were not among them.”

Yasuhira was probably itching to hit his brother but he was unmistakably someone who could control his temper. “Otouto, Yoshitsune-dono is lenient enough to overlook your impertinence please do not anger him further.”

Yorihide bowed to us profusely but before he left, “Yorihide hopes Yoshitsune-dono is also kind enough to share his talent with a novice like me.”

Straightforward, assertive, and good-natured with a bit of cheek: these were my impressions of Fujiwara no Yorihide who would have grown to be a valuable ally if he were not betrayed by his very own.

…

Just before going to bed, I began my first tutoring of young Yorihide who did not fail in showing up to pester, beg, and even go so far as crying to persuade me in teaching him to become a better flutist. Before he could try his hand at sword training, the most shattering news circulated around the palace: Fujiwara no Hidehira, my benevolent patron and adoptive father has passed away in sleep.

Bursting into tears, Yorihide ran off while I was abruptly pulled towards a powerful torso that hid itself in the shadows for some time. Thick sturdy arms wrapped so tightly around me that struggling was nigh impossible since my feet dangled uselessly. “Unhand me, Musa!” I hissed.

“Master must abandon this foolishness. We cannot stay here any longer. Yasuhira-dono is not the same as his father. His beliefs are easily changed. If Master does not cooperate with Musashi-bou’s insight a great tragedy awaits him.” Benkei whispered to me in an unyielding manner.

“And since when have you learned to foresee the future, you wretched monk? Release me this instant!” I raged, kicking him several times using his grip as my leverage. Unfortunately, physical pain never deterred him. He doubled his efforts rendering me virtually helpless and raced towards the courtyard like I weighed nothing.

Before Benkei managed to slip past the second gates, I heard a shout, “Yoshitsune-dono!”

Mustering my most imperious voice I spoke, “Saito Musashi-bou Benkei, my adoptive father has just died and you dare forbid me to either grieve or pay him my last respects!”

Benkei halted and placed me on the ground. I gave him a resounding slap and deeply bowed towards the approaching Fujiwara no Yasuhira. “Forgive my irrational servant, Yasuhira-dono. Panic has clouded his mind.” I pierce him a fiery glare, “Express your regret, Benkei.”

“Pardon me.” His insincere, teeth-clenched response provoked me to backhand him.

“It is alright, Yoshitsune-dono.” Yasuhira’s gaze was only affixed on me. In fact, my retainer could be a speck of dust under the new suzerain’s heel. He ushered me right back inside and together we left Benkei standing forlorn under a moonless sky.

…

While the key vassals did the rest of the vigil, Yasuhira proposed a drink in his quarters to honor his father and to appease his departed soul; celebrating the beginning of our alliance.

I was amazed that he could handle his liquor very well, contrary to what I expected. I on the other hand was starting to see the ceiling slowly spin before me. Not good. Not good at all.

As I massaged my temple to clear my head, Yasuhira excused himself to spread the doors to his well-maintained yard. I listened to him boast about his white camellias that were still in bloom despite the nearing winter season. He also remarked that my lack of appreciation for his garden was the fault of a concealed moon and returned closer to my side. Stirring the contents of his cup he fell silent. Then, out of the blue, his soft sobs spilled out.

I respectfully lowered my head and did not say a word.

“I am drunk,” Apparently having recovered, Yasuhira declared with an uncharacteristic laugh. He turned to me wearing the same daunting appearance. With eyes like burning obsidian, he slowly spoke, “Now that my father is no more, my sorrow is unbearable. Would Yoshitsune-dono be gracious enough to grant me two wishes?”

Misjudging his intentions I agreed. “What would those be?”

“First, I’d like you to play beautiful music solely for me tonight.”

Ignoring the trepidation creeping into my pores I nodded. “What else?”

“Hmm… I never expected you to be so accommodating.” An array of wicked expressions flashed in his face. This unanticipated development made me blame the alcohol.

But the danger proved real when he seized both of my wrists. He pushed me against the matted flooring, knocking the half-filled sake jar and a few bowls in the process.

The expensive liquor spilled and some managed to seep into my hair. He daintily sniffed at it. “What do you say if we forget my initial request since you conceded to both anyway?”

“Yasuhira-dono, please stop fooling around. We are both intoxicated. Here, let me call for your attendants to assist.” I fought past my alarm and tried to act sensible.

“Not so fast.” Before I could get up he swiftly held me down. “You haven’t listened to my second request.” He chuckled maliciously while burying his face on my hair. “Careless, foolish Yoshitsune… you know yourself that you are no weakling but you cannot even resist me.”

I was aghast, “You… put something in the wine.”

“Not only that.”

I could not even elude his lips as they molested my throat. “Stop, your father will not approve of this!”

Tearing at my robes, his tongue laved at my bare chest, which made me tremble in disgust. I was awake, was I not? Yet this was worse than that nightmare of Yoritomo. Fool! Why do I keep thinking of him?

As he violently nipped the bud of my breast I grimaced in pain. He resumed talking, “There is more. The garden before us… have I not told you that the poorly lit outdoors failed to warn you beforehand? Do not be furious. It is you who seduced me.”

“!” Sudden comprehension dawned on me.

“Basking in the early light of daybreak, exposing your masculine body while doing delicious things to it: a sensual self-love… who would not be enticed?”

He has seen me!

Oh vindictive gods in heaven!

Approaching heavy footsteps distracted me. And the next thing I saw was Benkei towering over us: his livid countenance resembled a frightful demon. Our eyes met. Without a word, my faithful retainer hauled Yasuhira off me with one hand and tossed him across the room. He hit the solid corner wall and was knocked unconscious.

Benkei unwrapped his cloak and draped it around my shoulders. The night was cold and I shivered. In my shame I could barely look at him now. But as gentle as he could, picked me up like a child and whispered, “What does Master want to do now?”

Uncaringly I spat, “Hold me and don’t you dare let me go.”

“As you wish.” His deep firm voice rumbled through his chest soothing me. He carried me aimlessly in the palace until we stopped before an empty room. “Yorihide-dono sleeps next to this place. Benkei thinks Yasuhira-dono would not act impulsively in front of his younger sibling.”

“Benkei, if you were to act as you please nothing can stop you. I have been recently incapacitated.”

“Is Master testing his servant?” He disregards my comment and bends over the hearth to start a fire with one arm as I currently occupy the other.

“And how would you respond if I say aye?” My half-lidded gaze observes him.

“It depends if Master is not warm after I burn sufficient firewood. On second thought, no, Benkei would not want to hear another’s name in Master’s lips.” Was this inept monk teasing me?

“Then you just have to gag me.”

Smoke drifted off the hearth, a spark and then flames crackled to life. “Master is drunk. He should sleep it off.”

“Pretending to be virtuous now, are we?” I snapped, burrowed in his cloak and slept.

(5)



Scattering dust, thunderclap hooves beat against loose moist earth of late spring. Charging almost unseeingly ahead I could not stop the sagging line at the corners of my mouth. To catch up, my faithful retainer whips his stallion into a faster pace. Behind our strong lead, Hiraizumi soldiers cheer and yell elated cries for a battle ended and a battle won.

We have effectively driven Kamakura Bakufu supporters off Fujiwara suzerainty yet again.

Earning victory after victory, I prove to my late benefactor’s heir that I am a worthy commander. Fujiwara no Yasuhira’s worries are unfounded for as long as I act as the sentry of Oshu, the land is unlikely to fall into the tyranny of Yoritomo.

Yet ever since that drunken autumn night, Yasuhira-dono has exhibited indifferent and civil attitudes towards me. And although I steadily gain the favor of his vassals, Musashi-bou’s doubts remain. My retainer believes news of Hidehira-dono’s death has reached Yoritomo’s ears and my brother being the cunning opportunist would exploit it to his advantage.

Reaching the stables, I dismount my horse and hand the reins to the attendant. He helps me get rid of the cumbersome helm, leather greaves and gauntlets. In my brisk stride, Benkei equally hurries for me before I could go on my way. Despite my reserved demeanor he has easily recognized subtle hints of my dark mood.

When his hand caught my arm, I cursed his ability to read me like no other.

“Master certainly is upset. What makes him so?”

I did not pull away and sneered, “Will I ever be spared from the clutches of your wayward mind?”

Benkei sighed. He knew more than anyone that dealing with me in this kind of situation would be difficult. However when my brooding and stubbornness combine, the results of his efforts are usually very unpleasant. “Master should tell his servant the reason for his displeasure.” He spoke more gently when we moved under the shade of a tree.

I shake my head. Not only has he guessed my mood correctly but he has also seen through the matter stewing beneath. “Tell me.” He daringly cradles my face with both of his hands.

“I am not a child,” I bristle but heat suffuses my cheeks.

“Shana-ou,” He whispered softly; I turn away and he grudgingly lets go.

I sat with my back leaning against the broad trunk. Legs half-bent, arms casually resting on my knees: a young man’s rebellious, uncaring posture. “That is right.”

Benkei positioned himself while minding respectful distance. “Master is being vague.”

My snort came off almost like a cynical laugh. “I have thought that after nearly four years of silence ‘he’ will ultimately take some personal action in the least.”

There was absolutely no puzzle in my words. Benkei pieced them together with ease. “Master is disappointed Yoritomo-dono did not actively participate in this war. And instead the shogun has sent representatives to fight for him. Is this still a surprise? Master should know him best.”

I could not help it but send Benkei a glare of death. He merely shrugged.

“One of them persuaded me to surrender peacefully into the arrest. He was so desperate he nearly cried and was killed as a consequence.” I laughed bitterly.

Musashi-bou frowned. “Master still believes Yoritomo-dono will spare him. If Master does not wake up from this lie, the people of Oshu will suffer the brunt of the tyrant’s ferocity. Innocents will die—”

My hand flew faster before I could stop. A red bruise bloomed on his cheek but I recoiled as if I were the one struck when he looked at me unwaveringly, beseechingly that I could not avert my eyes.

“How dare you,” I growled.

Benkei lowered his head exposing his neck. “It seems Master has no more use for this servant. For each time Benkei tried to reason with him, all this servant did was prick the master’s anger. I do not know what else to do.”

My eyes widened. They suddenly blurred with tears and I had trouble picking myself up to leave him. “Do not provoke me.” I exhaled a shaky breath and forced myself to flee the scene... from this pitiful man crouched on the ground.

A crushing weight enveloped my chest. I felt like my lungs were about to burst when Musashi-bou tightly held me from behind. “Forgive me,” He uttered harshly freezing me in place.

I admit defeat. “No, your master is the fool. He believes in a dream long shattered¹¹⁶.” Swallowing slowly and hoping my voice would not betray me I ordered: “I release you from your oath.” Extracting myself from his grasp, my stiff feet ambled forward.

Amidst the heavily emotional atmosphere, a distraught retainer stumbles toward us, “Yoshitsune-dono! Yoshitsune-dono! Please come quick, it is terrible!”

I race to the stables and regardless of my command, Musashi-bou follows me as all three of us ride towards the palace.

…

The air of the mansion ensures one to feel disquiet. The courtyard leading towards the nobility’s quarters was completely deserted. From the corner of my eye, silver flashed. Benkei had unsheathed his naginata as he protectively flanked my side. I would have been awed by his faith if my blooming dread did not distract me.

As we rounded the corner to the final gate a piercing wail made the hairs of my nape to stand on end. I dismount the steed and warned Benkei, “Stand down,” Unsure if he had heard me I ran to the source of the cries.

The scene that awaits stopped me dead.

“We are too late,” The nameless retainer sagged to his knees.

Surrounded by a loose half-circle of perturbed vassals was Yasuhira-dono whose katana was soaked in thick sheets of blood. And there on the ground lay poor Yorihide’s body bearing gruesome slash wounds. My pupil was dreadfully pale, unmoving, and bleeding copiously. Yorihide had a serene look in his face as if he was merely asleep contrary to the regally-dressed woman languishing and sobbing hysterically before his corpse.

“Sister*, do not cry. Think of it this way: Yorihide will be happy to reunite with Father in the afterlife.” Yasuhira’s words never sounded so heartless.

“Yorihide!” She gave another blood-curdling wail. “Did you not listen to what Ane* said? If you have not spoken in defense of that Yoshitsune then you would not have ended like this!”

Her curses stabbed me a hundred times over. I reflexively took a step back when Yasuhira lifted his gaze and our eyes met. His look was filled with bitterness and contempt. In the depths of his pupils, tongues of fire licked stone hoping to devour but in vain.

Seeing him, seeing Yorihide brought me a sense of foreboding of what was to come. Fragments of my life revolved behind my eyelids.

After a while, Yasuhira-dono’s face went blank and he turned on his heel signifying our dismissal. At that time I did not know why but the line of his back starkly reminded me of Yoritomo.

To snap me from my trance, Benkei dragged me to his side and together with my meager supporters, we fled to Fujiwara no Motonari’s Koromogawa-jo.

(FINAL)

Roughly a year later, the premonition came true.

Fujiwara no Yasuhira had violated his vow to his late father by killing his younger brothers Yorihide and Tadahira. Owing to initial estrangements that formed between us, Yasuhira had succumbed to the pressure from Kamakura and dealt with me accordingly.

On the 30^th of Uzuki, July, he sent 500 cavalrymen with no intention of “arresting me” but to plead for clemency by personally bringing my head to Yoritomo.

…

We were fighting a losing battle. Against Benkei’s excessive insistence to forsake my followers to save myself, I order him to bring me to the castle’s inner chapel, which he reluctantly obeyed.

Before I graced the hall of Buddha, he helped me perform several purification rites. Oblivious to the burning walls and destruction of the castle keep, the terrible noises of killing and the cries of agony, Musashi-bou helped shed my clothes, worshipping my body until I could no longer think of Yoritomo.

Alone, I cleansed myself in the small adjacent bath and emerged wearing a white plain robe. In greetings, Benkei bowed solemnly before me, removed his Buddhist necklace and placed the beads around my clasped hands.

“Since my oath no longer binds me, I am afraid I shall meet the last day before you, Master.”

“Then I will follow afterwards.” I looked into his deep molten gaze with affection.

Before he stepped out of our sanctuary, he smiled, “See you in a while.” Fully armed and clad in his finest armor, he did not let a single enemy pass to disturb me inside.

Still witnessing Benkei’s stance by small spaces of the wooden panels I did not notice the entry of an intruder.

Only mildly surprised by Yasuhira’s presence I courageously approach him with a bottle of sake in hand. “Yasuhira-dono, will you care to join me for a drink?”

He almost cringed as I threw his words right back at him. Gritting his teeth he said, “Your retainer is dead; did you invite me to celebrate?”

“Why yes,” I smile languidly, stagger towards him and collapse in his lax form.

Despite himself, his arms possessively coil around me. “You are wasted already but you do know what I came for, right?”

With the last ounce of my strength I lift my defiant face to the fear and shock of Yasuhira. “Two things: you are too late and you are a disgrace to your father.” I convey the venom in my stare.

Realizing what I had truly done, Yasuhira shrieks like a mad man and shoves my half-dead body off him. I very badly wanted to see his dance of terror but the abyss claimed me all too soon.

…

In the bosom of unending darkness, a bright white light appeared: like being embraced by the sun’s rays the goddess, Amaterasu took me as her own and appointed me to a divine task of guiding souls. As her chosen avatar, I gained the knowledge that Musashi-bou Benkei had been reincarnated into a different man and has no recollection of me.

Before long I was bestowed the opportunity to a fateful encounter with Amaterasu’s celestial brother, Susano-o.

Never in my wildest dreams did I expect Takehaya Susano-o-no-mikoto-sama’s visit in His guise.

The first spoken word of Susano-o’s vessel immediately made me want to flee, “Saiai¹¹⁷,”

~TBC

111 – Saburo refers to none other than his eldest brother, Hojo Ujimasa.

112 – In Chapter 33 at the near end of Happyaku-nen arc, Yoshitsune and company leave in the guise of travelling monks. Along the way, while fleeing Yoritomo’s supporters they were almost captured but Benkei strongly insisted that Yoshitsune was not among them. To prove his claim, he beats the crap out of “Yoshitsune” until the bunch is satisfied. Since no servant would dare harm his master, they were safely allowed to pass. Benkei profusely apologized to Yoshitsune afterwards and that was the first time Benkei shed tears.

113 – Yoshitsune’s supposed name during his exile in Kurama-dera.

114 – When Yoshitsune was young, legends say that his mentor in Kurama-dera who taught him the basics of sword fighting, horsemanship, warfare tactics, the arts and even philosophy was said to wear the mask of a tengu (winged-goblin) all the time. Some historical records state that he is an old vassal of Yoshitomo (Yoshitsune and Yoritomo’s father) who survived the Taira’s attack.

115 – Son (Dearly manner)

116 – Yoshitsune believes his life’s purpose was to aid Yoritomo win the war against the Taira for the Minamoto and for their father.

117 – Beloved

Post A/N: Man that was a LONG chapter. Do you see the similarity between Yoshitsune and Saburo Kagetora? They were both betrayed by people whom they sought refuge and died in the end.

The inspiration for this arc is still Azumi Moka-sensei’s “Amasakaru,” while my assorted reference comes from J. Gilbert, Wikipedia, and Nihon Zatsuroku. I know some readers have noticed this but I have a habit of updating my chapters where I locate errors or wrong terms. Recently I had done Chapter 33 (please don’t hurt me). Please review and tell me what you think. Your reviews mean so much to me.
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400 Years Apart