Darker Than You

Authors Note: Ok, this is completly different then what Katou\'s real life is like. Sae is being replaced by a younger sister, Katline, who is a complete jerk to him and his mother. His mother is basically what Sae is, only doesn\'t call him Yue-chan or anything to that matter. Robert is Katou\'s \"Father\" the one that raised him that is. Still abusive, and yes... he has an American name, because he originated from America, haven\'t completly worked out why he\'s in Tokyo or anything just yet, but yeah. This is just something I put together at random. Thank you and enjoy.


Warning: Might be some OOC, rape, yaoi, angst, suicidal thoughts, attempt suicide, drug abuse, child abuse, wife abuse, cussing, lemons, and VERY bad spelling and about anything else that I might and will add to this story.

Rated: PG-for now, bu the rating will go up as I get further into this one.

Disclaimer: I don\'t own any of the characters of Angel Sanctuary and the names I use for Katou\'s family are not really there either. And YES, I do know his real family and all that crap but this is an AU fic.

Time Frame: uh... no where, its AU thank you.

Told from Katou\'s POV.

~Part 5~

I lay awake at some ungodly hour at night. I can\'t even really think right now, to tired to sleep. Kira is asleep next to me, sleeping like a feather lost within the windy sky\'s breez floating about on the ground. I look at him, eyes closed. He sleeps with his hair pulled back. but his bangs, being shorter than the rest of his hair, falls over his nose and eyes.

I stare at him. Is it wrong to want your best friend and caretaker? I mean, he\'s always been there for me. Always. And I always want to be near the fool. He\'s not really a fool. Because, unlike me, he can keep ahold of his life and whip it into shape whenever he wants to. So unlike me, who just rides the waves of time not really giving a care about anything that happens to me.

I roll over agitated by nothing in paticular but the fact that he\'s perfect and I\'m not. That he had everything he could ever ask for, and I had jack shit. I don\'t understand why someone would waste such a life such as he did. Not that I was complaining or anything, I just always wondered what made it so.

His father was a nice man, didnt give a shit if I came or not. I sigh and roll over again, feeling stupid for trying to sort out Kira\'s situation. It wasn\'t any of my busniess to even TRY to understand it.

A restless hand moves its way under the covers and settles around my waist. I sigh, knowing this feeling all to well. Always made me relax whenever being held closely to Kira. He was so powerful and strong, it was almost scary.

A warm body pressed against my back, and I could feel that soft warm breath that felt like fire whisper is presence across my neck. I shutter slightly, pressinainsainst him, wondering if the beauty was awake or sleeping. And I dont know what I would even prefer.

I hear him murmer something into the dark cold air. His hair falls over my cheek as he snuggles closer to my body. I can tell that he\'s asleep. Becuase of his breathing being so soft and gental, almost like the purr of a kitten.

I wonder if he\'s dreaming. And If he is, then what is it about. I mean, jeez I think the best way to get to know someone\'s view about something is to know what they dream about. Because thats what their dream reality is. I know what I dream about. Having a caring father figure around to maybe help clean me up. Maybe to have my younger sister be more like a sister, and not so perfect. Maybe have my mother try to stand up for herself against Robert. And maybe Mama to have never had me.

Thats what I dream about. And then, sometimes I dream about actually living on and changeing my ways. Finding a nice girl to settle down with and love and be loved for who I am and nothing more. But, being who and what I am, I know that is always going to be just a dream. Because I\'m a worthless cause now. No one seems to notice though for some reason.

Like Kira, he always seems to not care that I don\'t crack up to be anything more than just a piece of shit taking up food, air, and space in this already over crowed world in which we all exist in this non existant happy world.

But this is just me talking. I know I\'m a failure, and thats all there is to it.

Kira is a funny little bastard. Now here he is, kissing lightly at my neck sendnig me goose bumps. I close my eyes in a dreamy state. But I hear him speak softly, bringing me back to my body and out of my thoughts, \"Your.. still awake?\"

\"Can\'t sleep,\" I growl lowly, hopeing he\'d just go back to sleep. I hate it when he gets to be a mushy little shit brain. He can turn me on so easily and totally ignore that fact. I hate it.

\"Hmm... why?\" he purrs into my ear, causeing me to shiver again as he pulls me even closer. I feel his perfect body press agaisnt mine, and I wonder what he is feeling when he holds me so protectivly. I feel so safe in his embrace sometimse. But then, I know its all a dream for this isn\'t reality. Just my mind fucking with me.

\"To much on my mind,\" I hope he will stop asking quistions.

Slowly he allows his hands to travle my body. Damn him to hell. I find it funny how fast my views change in seconds.

\"You want to... do something about them?\"

Is that a trick quistion?! I wonder vengfully. I mean come on, if that is a trick quistion, I dont want to take it the wrong way, because then He\'ll look down on me even more than he already does.

\"Not really.\"

\"Ok... what ever you say, Katou,\" Kira removes his hands and arms from me and roll over onto his side. His bed squeeks slightly as he does this, \"Get some sleep. We have to wake up early.\" And with that, the bastards asleep.

I hate it when he does that.

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To Be Continued...