Non Compos Mentis

I would like to thank everyone who has taking an interest in this story. I am sorry for the lack of update but I have been very busy. I will be back on track soon with regular updates so please be patient. Once again, thank you very much.

A/N: Please note that 'Kazuma Sohma' will be called 'Shishou' (A martial arts master) like in the manga.

A/N 2: For reason, my stories have gone missing on this site and I am not able to stay logged in. The lack of update to this site is mainly due to that.

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Last Time:

Oddly enough. For the first time, a small grin appears on my face. It held no scorn or hints of vengeance like before. Just as quickly it is gone but I know Kyo saw it.

Just like that, the beginning of a strange bond formed between us. It was weak and barely existent. It was as fragile as a soapy bubble, but the making of something incredible was forming. Something so powerful it could move heaven and earth.
The only question is, will we both survive the long road a head?

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"Non Compus Mentis"

Chapter: 4


That night sleep eluded me. I sat in the dark staring out of the open shogi doors at the garden. It was slightly nerve wracking to know Kyo was sleeping down the hall from my own bedroom. I have been waiting for this night all week and now that it is here. I feel lost and out of place.

I listen to the nightly music of the moon. The wind whispers sweat words of seduction as it tickles the leaves on the trees. Grasshoppers play their nightly serenade. The sound of trickling water from the pond at the back of the Sohma estate wafted through the air. Through all this, I felt no peace or tranquility. Instead, I felt empty and lost. My hands clench in my lap. I want to tear at my flesh. Any feeling is better then the vast nothingness that is devouring me. The void in my chest threatens to cave in what little humanity I have left.

By the time I enter the black void known as sleep, the sun has begun to rise illuminating the dark circles under my eyes. I look ragged and exhausted. My fever has come back to taunt me.

Four hours later I am woken by a knock at my bedroom door. I still feel slightly exhausted but not as bad as before. I sit up in my futon and notice that at some point someone must have closed the shogi doors to the patio because my room is dark. I could care less. I like the dark. The dark does not judge. It's cool and calm, concealing all. The knock comes again irritating me.

"Hai," my voice is slightly husky from sleep.

The door slides open to reveal Hatori. He walks in, his white doctors coat billowing out behind him. Once he gets to my futon he kneels down and stares at me with the only eye that is not damaged and concealed by his hair. A memory flashes in my minds eye of what I did to Hatori's eye. For a brief moment I feel a slight pang of something like overflowing sadness and regret but I squash the feeling before it has time to take root.

"What do I owe this lovely visit to?" I ask sarcastically.

"How are you feeling today, Akito-sama?"

"Sorry to disappoint you, but I don't think I’ll drop dead today." I reply. As always, my mood hasn't changed. It’s sour and bitter.

Hatori gives me his no nonsense look. I don't care. I am the one that controls this family. I decide to enlighten him and cut to the chase. "My fever has gone down and, as you can obviously see, I am still living."

"Very well. Did you sleep well?" He asks calmly.

"Does it look like it?"

We stare at each other in a stand off. I know Hatori has an alternative reason for seeing me this morning. He is a nosy bastard after all, thus one can conclude that he wants to know why Kyo is here.

I'd rather die then tell him.

"Is that all Hatori?" I had better things to do then play this guessing game.

"Kyo is here." He pauses to see if I will supply any information.

"And?" I ask bluntly.

"Is there a reason for him being here?" Hatori's eyes lock on mine as if he were trying to drill the answer out of me.

"That is none of your business. You may go now Hatori."
Just like that I dismiss him. He gets up and walks to the door to leave. Before he can depart, I call out to him.

"Hatori." He turns and looks at me. Once my eyes catch his I turn my glare on full blast. "Interfere with me and I swear to all the gods you will wish you were never born." Our eyes stay locked. A pregnant silence consumes us. Hatori takes an unnoticeable sharp breath and breaks the silence.

"I already wish that Akito-sama."

I continue to stare at him and he stares right back. For a moment I feel we are on the same wavelength. Something like kinship starts to blossom in my chest but my sadistic side kicks in and I dismiss the stray emotion. I quickly put out of mind all thoughts pertaining to friendship. Hatori turns around and slides open the door. Before he leaves he looks over his shoulder and says, “I understand.”

The words slid out of his mouth smoothly and he takes his leave.

I lie back down on my futon and stare up at my ceiling. Hours go by but I can't seem to find the energy to get up and do anything. My thoughts are interrupted by another knock at my door.

"Hai," I call out.

"Akito-sama, will you be taking breakfast in your room today?" A servant asks through the door. Her question seems completely ridiculous to me. Every meal of everyday, I eat in my bedroom. My room is my sanctuary and cage. However it is the only place I have for just me.

"Hai." I finally answer.

"And what about your guest Akito-sama?" She asks politely.

For a moment I am confused as to whom she is referring to. Then it hits me, Kyo is also residing in the main house. Once again, that unknown feeling washes over me. I dismiss it.

"He can have breakfast where ever he wants. I do not care." I quickly dismiss her.

I sigh heavily and let my facade slide away after the servant leaves. Just the mention of my desires name sets my nerves on edge. Honestly, I had no idea what I was thinking when I told Shigure to bring Kyo here. I often do things without thinking them through. Oh well. What's life without a few bumps in the road, or in my case, mountains?

Twenty minutes later the servant returns with my breakfast but she us not alone. Another servant enters carrying a second breakfast. What the hell is going on? I hardly ever eat breakfast and when I do I never finish it, so why did they bring so much food?

"What is the meaning of this? Do I look like a hippopotamus?" The skittish maids flinch at my questioning.

"You said that Kyo-san could eat where ever he wanted," the braver of the two answered.

"So? That does not explain all this food."

"Well, Akito-sama, Kyo wants to eat here."

I was stunned for a moment. Maybe I didn't hear her correctly. My fever might be coming back.

"What did you say?"

"Kyo-san, he would like to eat his breakfast with Akito-sama."

I was even more startled hearing this statement a second time. In all my life, I have never had breakfast with another living being. Would I have to make idle chitchat with him while we eat? I didn't even know how to carry on a conversation nor have I ever wanted to.

I pushed my thoughts out of my mind. I was acting completely out of character. I got up and changed my kimono to a black one that had white stitching. I walked over and sat by my tray of food. The sitting pillow felt good under me. I noted that my room was still without light. I have become so accustom to leaving the lights off that I forget that it is not normal.

A knock at the door interrupts my thoughts. I quickly put my facade back on.

"Hai," I call out.

The door slides open to reveal Kyo. My breath hitches and I have to look away. My eyes fix on my plate. He is wearing a tight black shirt and baggy cargo pants. His voice washes over me like a rich vintage wine.

"Ohayo gozaimasu, Akito-sama." His tone of voice is flat and portrays no emotion. I can hear him enter the room and close the door behind himself. I hear his feat move along the boards of the floor as he walks over to the food across from mine and takes a seat on a sitting pillow. I can feel his blazing gaze on me. The hair on my arms stands up like I got electrocuted. A tense silence follows. He breaks the silence.

"Do you always eat in the dark?"

"If you don't like it then leave."

At the back of my mind I realize I am having a conversation with Kyo. It's a bit strange and dysfunctional, but just the same, I am conversing. My eyes remain downcast on my food, but my ears are fully alert. I hear him get up and walk over to where the doors to the outside patio are. I fain disinterest, but in truth, his every word and action keeps me on my toes. His unpredictable nature could match my own. Suddenly. Both patio doors are pulled to each side. The bright morning light consumes every inch of the room. I cannot suppress a hiss that escapes my lips. My eyes squeeze tight then re-open as my pupils dilate. My head snaps up to glare as he takes a seat.

"Who gave you permission to open those screens?" Who does this stray thinks he is? I will not be made a fool of.

"Your eyes are intense."

His simple statement throws me off kilter. Again I find my self-gazing into the inferno known as Kyo's eyes. I don't know what to say. I get the urge to look away. It's an itch that starts in my stomach and makes its way up to my neck. His eyes make me feel naked. That strange new feeling blossoms in my chest. I can't take it; I start to look away.

"Stop." His voice is commanding and firm.

My eyes snap back to his.

"Don't tell me what to do." I sneer, trying to cover up my uncertainty. For some reason I don't mind taking orders as long as they are from Kyo. I take a breath to steady myself and continue. "I make the rules for the Sohma's. You will respect me or feel my wrath." My eyes glow, showing the insanity that exists in the depths of my being.

"And if I don't agree," Kyo says. His gaze never wavers.

I snap. With a wave of my hand our breakfast plates are sent crashing to the floor. I grab my fork and dive at Kyo. I push him down and straddle his waste putting my fork against his throat. My breathing comes rapidly. I am still recovering from my recent bout of illness. After a moment the red haze that clouds my vision, ebbs away.

"Don't. Fuck. With. Me." I sneer out. My face is only inches away from his. Our eyes lock.

Kyo is quite. His eyes wide in shock. If he didn't know about my legendary mood swings, he knows now.

"Hai," Kyo says. His voice is low and slightly unstable.

The closeness is too much for me to bare and I retreat from his lap. I sit back on top of my sitting pillow. A persistent cough wracks my body. Silence rains in the room as Kyo straightens himself and I try to gain a sliver of composure.

"May I have your permission to train with Shishou this afternoon?" Kyo asks. His emotionless voice agitates me to no end. Why am I the only one that never gets to see past his facade? Only that bitch, Tohru.

"No," I say. Jealousy eats away at my insides. Kyo's intentions are now clear to me. Why else would he want to be in my company if not to gain something? This fact alone makes my blood boil.

"But I-"

"No." I cut him off. I don't want to hear what he has to say.

"I just-."

"No!" I raise my voice in anger. My placid facade cracking every second.

Silence chokes the air in the room. My gaze turns to the outside garden. I feel him glaring at me. Let him. I don't care if his glare melts my skin off. I will not let him go to visit someone else!

"Then you train with me."

I am completely taken a back by his declare. He is a persistent bastard! My gaze turns to him in disbelief. "What?" I ask.

"Train with me this afternoon," Kyo says once again.

I think over his words. I don't think I could deal with the closeness involved with sparing. "No." I reply.

"Yes." Kyo's persistent voice sounds out.

"Don't tell me what to do!" My temper is rising. I can feel the beginning of a panic attack coming on.

"Sacred?" His words are mocking.

I glare at him. "Never."

"Then train with me."

I stay silent for a moment. Then my lips move of their own accord.

"Fine."

Kami-sama, I'm being pushed to my limits and close to the edge. I should be afraid of falling. However, that fear disapates when I think of Kyo being willing to take that fall with me. With him , I’d gladly jump.

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--End Chapter--

TBC…

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