Chasing Cars

AN: The story is titled 'Chasing Cars' because my influence for this story was the song 'Chasing Cars' by Snow Patrol. Somehow, it seemed to fit the couple. If you haven't heard it, listen to it. You'll see what I mean. ^^ also, in this story, Ouran is more of a boarding school. I don't know for sure if every day they go home or if they spend the night in their own rooms at the academy and go home on the weekends, so I just made it like a regular boarding school where they go home on the weekends. please don't criticize me for this.


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Haruhi ended up being sick for three days, and Hikaru waited on her hand and foot until she got better.

The first day, Haruhi was a bit more active (that is to say, she was able to stay up for an hour without almost passing out from exhaustion), choosing to play Hikaru’s DS most of the day while he either got her food or gave her tips on how to play. He pointed out where to go, how to solve each puzzle, and when she got hungry, he ran to the kitchen, quickly made her something to eat, and ran back.

Haruhi smiled at him warmly at the end of the first day as she snuggled into the blankets. “Thank you, Hikaru.” She murmured. Hikaru only smiled back and ruffled her hair before turning off the light.

The next day, Haruhi was able to stand up and walk around a bit without feeling too sick. When she woke up, Hikaru was taking a shower.

“Hikaru?” She asked, opening the door.

“Yes?” His response was muffled by the shower curtain and pouring water.

“Is it okay if I come in and brush my teeth?”

“But you haven’t even had breakfast yet!”

“But I hate the feeling of a dirty mouth in the morning.”

She heard Hikaru laugh, than: “Yea, it’s fine. Come in.”

So she walked in and brushed her teeth, trying her hardest to not think about the fact that Hikaru was in the room with her - completely naked.

“Hey, Haruhi.”

She continued to focus her thoughts on brushing all of her teeth, but all the same, she responded (with some difficulty, as the toothbrush was still in her mouth). “Yeah?”

“Is…is it still raining?”

She walked out of the room and looked out the window, than came back.

She spit the toothpaste out of her mouth, than rinsed. “Yeah, it is.” She told him, turning to leave.

“Ah, okay.”

“I’ll be going now, alright?”

“Okay.”

She exited the bathroom and closed the door, than crossed the room to the bed. She didn’t feel like playing Hikaru’s DS, so she instead lay down on the bed and closed her eyes.

Hikaru finished his shower and entered the room. “Hey, Haru-” He stopped as he noticed the girl sleeping on his bed peacefully, her back moving up and down as she breathed. “Ah, okay.”

He sat down on the edge of the bed, watching her sleep, when her eyes fluttered open. “Hikaru?” She yawned, than sat up. “Oh, I fell asleep. Sorry.”

He laughed and smiled at her. “It’s fine, it’s fine. Are you hungry?”

She thought about this for a moment, than nodded.

“Do you have any requests?”

“Curry.”

Hikaru smiled. “Curry? Okay, I’ll try.” He stood up and left the room.
He walked as quickly as he could to the kitchen. He didn’t like leaving her alone in his room when there was a storm.

He had grown more attracted to her in the past several days - not romantically of course, but as though the friendship between them had deepened. He hoped with all of his heart she felt the same.

He glanced out the window to see the thunderheads. He hoped and prayed that lightning and thunder wouldn’t come. Not now, when he had left her alone. He made it to the kitchens and started making the curry for her as soon as he walked inside.

“I’m back!” He sang out to her as he opened the door, holding a book under one arm and a steaming hot cowl of curry in the other hand. Haruhi’s eyes fluttered open and she sat up, smiling at him as he handed her the bowl.

“Wow, you made this?” She asked incredulously, “All by yourself?”

Hikaru grinned. “Hah, yeah! I picked up a book the other day from the school library.” His gaze shifted to the curry in her hands. “A cookbook.”

Haruhi played with the spoon a bit and finally took an experimental bite. Hikaru was nearly biting his nails from the tension, but relaxed when she swallowed and smiled up at him. “It’s delicious, Hikaru!” She said happily, “Really, really delicious!”

Hikaru laughed, proud that his own cooking was enough to please even Haruhi’s picky taste buds. She had eaten about half the soup when Hikaru looked down at her a few minutes later.

“Haruhi, you eat fast.” He commented. Haruhi just nodded and kept eating, her eyes remaining downcast.

Hikaru frowned - she wasn’t the person to not look you in the eye when you spoke to her. What was wrong?

He knelt down and placed a hand against her forehead. “Hmm,” He muttered, “you still have a fever. You feel okay?”

She swallowed and opened her mouth to respond, but it wasn’t words that came out…

“Ah, gosh, Haruhi! You’re really sick!!” Hikaru exclaimed, quickly removing his shirt splattered with her vomit. He pulled open his dresser and put on a baggy t-shirt, than faced her again. Her face was covered by her hands.

“I’m sorry,” He barely heard through her fingers, “I’m so very, very sorry, Hikaru!” She split two of her fingers apart and peeked at him guiltily.

Hikaru quickly ran to the bathroom and grabbed a towel, than handed it to her. “It’s fine!” He laughed, sitting down next to her on the bed. He placed a hand on her back - she was shaking. “Are you really okay?” He asked quietly, taking the towel and rolling it up.

She looked up at him, her eyes still cloudy, watery, and filled with guilt. Her face was pale. Hikaru frowned worriedly, than reached forward and pulled her into a warm hug.

“Don’t worry about it, Haruhi,” He whispered into her ear, “Just go to sleep, and I’ll clean up, okay?” She was still shaking uncontrollably from throwing up, but she nodded and closed her eyes.

He stood up carefully, letting her head hit the pillow gently, than grabbed the towel and his shirt and exited the room. He’d make two stops, he decided - the washing room and the kitchen.

From the kitchen, he grabbed a big, rusty bowl painted with tacky bright blue and pink flowers. In the washing room, he shoved the towel and shirt into a washing machine and turned the dial, than left quickly. He didn’t want to leave her alone again - the storm was letting up some, but still…

It was like he kept having excuses to leave her alone, so that he’d want to miss her. Perhaps he wanted her to miss him, but why?

He decided he’d leave these confusing thoughts until he got Haruhi feeling better. He remembered once when he was little and had had the stomach flu and Kaoru hadn’t, so Kaoru had played sick so that they wouldn’t have to be apart at school. Hikaru had cried endlessly about the fact that they were different all o a sudden because he was sick and Kaoru wasn’t, but Kaoru had just smiled and said they were bound to be different someday.

Kaoru.

How long had it been since he’d even spared a thought to his brother? At least two or three days - a long time to Hikaru. Guilt plagued his thoughts like a bad disease.

He shook his head, as though that might clear these thoughts away, and though he knew he could just try not to think about it, they’d be there. His world was changing dramatically. How or why, he wasn’t sure yet.

He had reached his room. Did Haruhi miss him? No, she was probably asleep. His face burned, but he opened the door nonetheless.

“Haruhi?” He whispered. The bed was empty. He almost dropped the bowl, but he caught himself just in time, than heard a terrible retching noise from the bathroom. His chest loosened in relief - she was here, she was safe, but she was sick.

“Haruhi,” He said, entering the bathroom. Yes, there she was; kneeling in front of the toilet, her arms shaking and her face pale and sweaty. He knelt down beside her in a flash and rubbed her back, as though that would soothe the pain in her stomach.

“Do you have a headache?” He asked. She nodded, her eyes glancing over quickly at him and than flashing back to the toilet. He stood up and searched inside the medicine cabinet, finally withdrawing a plastic bottle of Advil.

He handed her two small tablets, which she took quickly and swallowed. Her body relaxed, as though swallowing them had helped her already, despite the fact they hadn’t dissolved in her stomach yet. She fell flat on her bottom and breathed in ad out deeply, finally looking up at him.

“I’m sorry,” She whispered hoarsely. Hikaru smiled and brushed his fingers against her forehead. “It’s fine,” He whispered back.

And then came another sudden impulse - he wanted to kneel forward and kiss her on the forehead; he wanted to look into her eyes and watch her reaction at his loving and tender peck. His face flushed again, and he pulled away quickly, as though if he got too close his lips would move on their own - what would be his punishment from Haruhi for such an act?

He actually wanted to know, and his lips quivered excitedly. He grabbed her hand and helped her up, leading her to the bed. “Lay down,” He murmured, his face still burning, the thoughts of his lips on hers still going through his mind. She complied unhesitatingly, and he placed the bowl beside her pillow. “That’ll be there if you get sick again, okay? That way you don’t have to get up.” He smiled at her and placed his hands on his hips.

She nodded and closed her eyes. “Hikaru?” She asked quietly, her eyes still closed. He looked up. “Yeah?”

“Thank you…” She was nodding off, so her words were slow. “…very much…”

And she was asleep. Hikaru smiled again. It was comforting knowing she was grateful for his help, and he felt that impulse again. He thought about doing it now - she was asleep, perhaps she wouldn’t feel it, but the feeling of guilt he knew would come afterward kept him back.

His hand found its way to his mouth, and he stroked his lips thoughtfully. What was it Kaoru had said after he had yelled at her that time during summer? You know only how to thrust your feelings upon her… But this time, he was holding his feelings back. But what feelings?

And this got him thinking again - Haruhi was, of course, his best friend beside Kaoru. He had often flirted with her, but was it always just to get the Lord jealous?

He closed his eyes and tried to remember how he’d felt when he last held her hand in front of the Lord with his brother - ah, yes. There had been a little spark of excitement coursing through his veins at the feel of her skin on his, of her hand held firmly within his own. His face had flushed slightly and he had felt happy - what did you call that?

His breath was coming shorter now - short, small gasps through his mouth. No, his mind raced. No, no, no. Never. Kaoru wouldn’t --

Kaoru would what?

What would Kaoru do if he told him he loved her?

Guilt washed over him like a tidal wave, so sudden it almost sent him sprawling. Would it hurt Kaoru, knowing his brother wanted to move on so suddenly? He sat down suddenly on the edge of the bed, making the mattress shake. He looked over to see if he had disturbed her, but no - she was still sleeping peacefully.

And than, an even scarier thought appeared in his mind - would Kaoru hate Haruhi? Would he think she had stolen his brother from him?

His face got very hot suddenly, but not from blushing. He was scared - he really was. Change was something new to him. The first change he’d experienced had only been a year ago, when Tamaki had asked the two of them to join the Host Club.

And change kept coming after that, as though joining had set off a chain reaction, or rather, Haruhi joining had set it off. She’d been the first person to tell them apart. She’d unknowingly stepped into their private world, and they’d welcomed her - they’d never been close with anyone before, and yet they’d suddenly accepted her. Why would Kaoru agree to such a request from Hikaru? He’d asked him about it many times - Do you think Haruhi’s okay? Is it alright to get close to her?

And now, he wanted to ask:

“Is it okay to love Haruhi, and want her more than anything else in the world? Is it okay to feel this way about her? Is it alright to want to kiss her and hug her and never let her go?”

His heart clenched - yes, this was what he wanted, desperately. Why had it taken him so long to realize this? And than, he got to thinking -- did Kaoru already know? He knew more about Hikaru than Hikaru knew about himself, so maybe he did. Maybe he’d realized it long before Hikaru had even thought about the possibility of falling in love with Haruhi. More importantly…

How did Kaoru feel about it?

He decided he’d call him and ask him. He couldn’t take not knowing how his brother would feel - the guilt would overwhelm him. Dialing his number into his cell phone with shaking fingers, he thought up quickly what he would say.

The dial tone coursed through his ears and he felt afraid. He couldn’t do it - not in his own voice. He was a coward, a stinking, rotten coward. He was too afraid to tell his own brother that he was in love.

He gazed up slowly, letting his eyes linger on Haruhi for some time. “Too afraid,” He whispered quietly, “to even tell the one person involved.”

She made a small little moan in her sleep and sat up, her eyes open. “Hikaru…” She whispered raggedly before grabbing the bowl and vomiting in it. He handed her a tissue, and she wiped her mouth.

“Here,” He took the bowl and emptied it in the toilet, trying his hardest not to smell. What a perfect moment ruined…she had looked so sweet right now, her cheeks flushed slightly and her hair ruffled up in the back. Her eyes were wide and dull looking, and he had been tempted to screw the consequences and just go in for a kiss, but than she had thrown up. He rinsed the bowl out than handed it back to her. “Ta-dah!” She couldn’t help but smile at his usual cheerfulness.

She thanked him again and than laid down to sleep. Hikaru watched her eyes close, than whipped out his phone and texted Kaoru. He was sure now. He was very worried about what state Kaoru would be in when he read the message, but looking at her again gave him the courage he needed.

His phone made small beeping noises as he flicked through the different letters…4 pressed three times…a space…8 once…and so on and so on.

Finally, he finished the message. He didn’t want to send it now; he’d send it later, so he saved it to his ‘Drafts’ folder and closed the phone.

It was raining again. The sound of the rain drops hitting the window reminded him of the storm, and suddenly he was very tired - not just his body, but his mind. He had done way too much deep thinking that had left him confused today. Massaging his temples with his index and middle finger, he grabbed a spare blanket and a pillow and lay down on the floor.

He’d do it soon, he promised himself. She might’ve kissed a girl before, but that didn’t count, did it? No, she needed a real first kiss - one from a boy who was truly, madly, deeply in love with her. He was sure he was in love with her - he had been for quite some time, and now that he’d come to terms with it, it was easy to open up to it.

He closed his eyes, content, and fell asleep.

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When he woke up, Haruhi was awake.

“Morning,” She stated simply as he sat up and rubbed his eyes.

“What time is it?” He groaned. She looked down at him from atop her high perch on the bed and giggled. “It’s four thirty in the morning. We slept most of the day.”

Hikaru sat bolt upright and stared at her incredulously. True, he and Kaoru usually stayed up that late, but he’d never woken up at this time before. “Woah,” He murmured, “That’s weird.”

Haruhi nodded. “I haven’t thrown up in three hours.”

Hikaru beamed up at her. “That’s good! Has your fever gone down a bit?” He reached up and pressed the back of his hand against her cheek. Her face flushed at the contact, and his hand snaked away.

“I-it’s not as hot as before,” He muttered awkwardly, “so that must mean you’re getting better.” Haruhi smiled warmly and flopped back down on the pillow.

“Are you hungry?” He asked, his eyes not looking at her but at his socked feet sticking out from under the blanket. She propped herself up on her elbows and nodded.

“What do you want?”

“Toast.”

“That’s all?”

“Mhm.”

He shrugged; he was surprised she would want such a small meal after throwing up at least the whole day’s worth of food. But he stood up and waved to her as he exited the room all the same.

Haruhi watched him go curiously. He was acting a bit odd - as though he were awkward around her all of a sudden. She hadn’t done anything…so why would he be acting that way?

She decided it was his own problem and she’d just wait until it passed. They had about a week left here alone, so he’d have to warm up to her again soon.

Her hand brushed against her cheek where Hikaru had touched it. He’d withdrew his hand so shaken, his face a red mess and his mouth screwed up in a knot. His reaction confused her - he’d been holding hands with her and hugging her and carrying her and still he’d acted fine. Why the sudden change in attitude?

Maybe he misses Kaoru, she thought. That must be it.

The rain pounded against the window, matching the feel of the blood pumping into her head as she dwelled longer and longer on the subject.

“Haruhi?” She looked up, surprised. She hadn’t even heard the door open.

Hikaru handed her the plate with toast on it. “I didn’t want to burn it, so sorry if it’s a little soft…” He muttered, running his hand through his hair awkwardly. She poked the toast and looked up at him. “It’s fine. Thanks for making it!”

Hikaru blushed again, and his hand went to his mouth. “No…no problem.” He murmured before sitting down next to her on the bed.

He’d sent the text message on the way to the kitchen, and so he was pretty nervous about the response he’d get from Kaoru.

“Are you angry?”

He looked up at her with wide eyes. “Huh?”

She repeated the question after a swallow of toast. “Are you angry?”

“No. Why?”

“You seem different today, Hikaru.”

“Do I?” He muttered nervously. Shit…the last thing he needed now was for her to catch on to his feelings for her. He felt his face go white-hot again, and he knew his face must be red right now.

“What’s wrong?” She asked, leaning forward slightly.

Hikaru’s hand twitched; her lips were so close…there were toast crumbs on her cheek, he could just lean forward and lick them off…

But he didn’t. His hand went to her cheek and he brushed his thumb against the crumbs. She closed one eye and peeked at him. “Thanks,” She said quietly, returning her gaze to the empty plate in front of her.

Hikaru put his hands in his pockets and stretched out his legs. Upon glancing at her from the corner of his eyes, he found her hand on her cheek where he had brushed away the crumbs. Her eyes were distant, as though she were deep in thought.

She stood up suddenly, and he reached for her hand. “H-Haruhi…” He wanted to stop her and tell her right now, how hard could it be? Three simple words; that was all…

So why was his mouth so dry, his face so hot, his palms so sweaty?

She turned around and gazed at him questioningly. “Hmm? I’m going to the bathroom.”

His hand dropped. “Oh. Carry on, than.” He muttered awkwardly. How dumb he must’ve looked! He rubbed his eyes and sighed. This was going to be harder than he thought…

Haruhi came out a couple minutes later. “Is it alright if I take a shower?” She asked. He looked up and nodded. “Do you know how to work the shower?” He asked. She smiled and nodded before disappearing into the bathroom with an armful of clothes (pajamas) and a towel.

About half and hour later, she stepped out of the bathroom with just her towel wrapped around her. Hikaru sat up, surprised. “Forgot something,” She stated, reaching into her duffel bag.

“Haruhi,” Hikaru called to her before she went back into the bathroom. She turned around and he blushed at her curious glance. “You’re leg’s bleeding.”

She looked down and gasped audibly. “Ah, you’re right!” She cried. Hikaru was there in a flash. He stole into the bathroom and grabbed a band-aid and was out in fourteen seconds flat.

“Here, come sit down on the bed and hold your leg out.” He said. She nodded and hobbled over awkwardly, not wanting to stain blood on the carpet. “I must’ve cut myself while shaving,” She muttered nervously as Hikaru kneeled down in front of her.

He unpeeled the wrapping and smiled up at her. “It’s fine! It’s not bleeding that bad.” He focused his attention on the cut and than placed the band-aid on it. He tried his hardest to keep his gaze from straying to the open part between her lifted leg - she was only wearing a towel, after all.

“Um,” He muttered nervously, his face red, “I’ll go get a couple tissues to wipe it up, okay?” He could feel her stare boring holes into the back of his neck as he fled into the bathroom. He leaned against the door - there were tissues on the nightstand! Duh!

He exited the bathroom, his face redder still from his mistake. God, today he’d ended up looking like such an idiot in front of her! But did it actually count as today? Wouldn’t they go back to bed and wake up and count that as tomorrow? He shook his head and grabbed a handful of tissues.

He wiped away the blood (his eyes focused on her ankle), than wadded up the tissues. The back of his hand brushed against her leg and she looked up in alarm. “Sorry,” He exclaimed, standing up quickly. “It’s fine!” She yelled back, also standing up. They were facing each other now, each blocking the other’s paths.

“Um,” He muttered, going one direction, only to meet her shoulder. “Sorry!” She cried, going the other direction. He smiled and laughed nervously and watched her hurry back to the bathroom to change.

She had been pretty much naked, his mind kept telling him. If you’d have told her right than…

No, no, no, he frowned. No, no, NO.

She entered the room clothed in her pajamas and made her way to the bed. Hikaru sat down on the floor, expecting to sleep there again, but Haruhi stopped him.

“I’m not that sick anymore,” She commented, her voice quiet and kind, “I don’t mind if you sleep with me tonight.”

He smiled back, relieved. He stood up and pulled back the covers with her, sliding under. Their feet met under the blanket, but aside from a sudden blush, neither moved. Bodies facing each other, they each drifted off to sleep.

Yes, Hikaru told himself before finally falling asleep for the night, (Or morning? He didn’t care anymore.) he loved her, and he wanted her to know.

His eyes closed slowly, and very soon he was asleep.

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Lightning streaked across the night sky, illuminating every part of the academy for a split second before thunder rumbled.

Haruhi’s eyes snapped open and she felt her heartbeat quicken at the thunder. She was sweating terribly, despite the fact it was cold in the room.

“Hikaru,” She whispered, terror lining every syllable in his name.

He awoke slowly, but he sat up at the sight of her tears. “The thunder?” He asked quietly. She only nodded and pushed herself up against his chest. He laid back down and wrapped his arm around her body, trying to steady her shaking.

“Will you be able to go back to sleep?” He asked, his eyes open wide, transfixed on the ceiling. She nodded against his chest, and he fell back asleep.

A bright flash and deep roar of thunder from behind the curtain made her whimper, but she relaxed when Hikaru’s hand squeezed her shoulder. She was surprised - she thought he’d fallen asleep. His eyes were still closed, but he rolled over and wrapped the other arm around her, leaving his head right above hers.

She let him keep her like this, and closed her eyes. She thought she felt his lips brush against her forehead, but maybe it was just the air.

All the same, that slight touch was full of love, and it made her fall into a calm sleep.


Yaaay. Next chapter’s lemony goodness! :3 It’ll be a song chapter. Enjoooyyy. : D