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Those What Ifs	By : humdrum07 Category: +M to R > Ranma ½ Views: 4703 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Ranma or its characters, nor do I make any money from this story

Chapter List
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HSaotome: I was just thinking that this would be better suited for MM.org, though I did have intentions of putting lemons in here. I'm just not the type to like lemons without a story behind them. I'm sorry it's taking a long time to get to the good stuff. :)

Hiroshi and Daisuke paced in front of the classroom frantically, occasionally glancing from the red-head seated beside Akane and Ryoga, to the red-head now sitting in Ranma's chair.

“So...” Daisuke halted in his pacing and pointed toward Ranma, “You... um...”

“You turn into your sister?” Hiroshi was now in front of Ranko's desk, peering down at her as she tried reading a book.

“Do you mind?” she raised an annoyed eyebrow and turned the page.

“No...” said Hiroshi.

“I don't turn into my sister... I'm just a female version of myself,” Ranma protested.

“Who looks just like your sister!” Daisuke almost yelled. He was horrified that his male classmate turned into the girl he had a crush on. He could only imagine, in the future, making out with who he thought was Ranko, only for it to be Ranma in his girl form.

“Hey, Ranko... I noticed you're not wearing your glasses today. I can see your pretty green eyes,” said Hiroshi, leaning on Ranko's desk and looking deeply into her eyes – now narrowed in anger.

“You're invading my personal space... remember Kuno?” Ranko rolled her eyes as the smile on Hiroshi's face faded and he scampered to his seat beside Ranma.

“Where the hell is this teacher?” Akane yelled and slammed her fist on the desk.

The teacher had just entered the room with his books in one arm. He immediately saw girl Ranma sitting with Hiroshi and Daisuke. “Ranko... what are you doing sitting near the window? Isn't your assigned seat with...” confusion filled his face as he looked at the more appropriately dressed Ranko seated beside Akane; hands clasped together over the desk and smiling sweetly. “Akane?”

“Goodmorning Mr. Tanaka!” Ranko greeted.

“But... where is Ranma... and who is that?” he pointed the girl Ranma.

“I'm Ranma...” Ranma raised her hand slowly. Hiroshi and Daisuke snickered at the odd look the teacher was giving her.

“You're not Ranma... he's male. Stop fooling around Ranko.”

“But Mr. Tanaka... that is my brother.”

Mr. Tanaka stood before the students, his hands on his hips. “So... that girl over there is... Ranma?” he asked slowly.

“Indeed!” Ranko replied.

The teacher flopped down onto his chair and ran his hands through his short black and white hair, “They don't pay me enough for this crap.”

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“I hate school...” Ranma – now in male form after finding some hot water during gym – let out an exasperated sigh as he walked on the fence.

“How could you say that? I find school rather fascinating!” Ranko smiled and walked past him.

“Of course you would,” he rolled his eyes. “You must get that from mom, 'cause we know dad ain't studious.”

Ranko suddenly gasped and craned her head up to look at Ranma. “Oh my...”

“What?” he asked.

“You said 'studious'... I'm surprised you know that word!” she pointed an accusatory finger at Ranma.

“Ha ha!” Akane laughed and gave Ranko a high five. “I knew I liked you!”

“Sure... whatever... give Ranma a hard time why don't'cha!” he walked in silence for a few minutes, looking up at the sky. “That Shampoo chick hasn't come back again today.”

“I wonder where she is...” said Akane as she stared off in space.

“Hey... I need to be going home... I doubt Mr. Tendo would let me stay the night again.” Ryoga decided to announce. He couldn't very well go home without being lost. He had to get to school the next day, and his mother – though she didn't really have any way of knowing if he attended – would not like her only son skipping out on school.

“Oh...” Akane was about to offer to lead him to his house, but Ranko cleared her throat and offered instead. “A-Are you sure Ranko? You don't really know where it is.”

“Ah, let her do it,” Ranma grinned for he suspected his sister had a crush on his rival. Oddly enough, he didn't really have a problem with it. Despite their rather... rocky re-acquaintance... he had always thought of Ryoga as a nice guy, and he was a martial artist to boot. In his eyes, he was far more worthy than Hiroshi and Daisuke, that's for sure. Ranma suspected they were just immature desperate perverted boys, only too willing to explore the female body.

“But Ranma...”

“Don't worry... Ryoga will tell me where it is!” and with that said, Ranko grabbed his hand, entwining their fingers.

“Um... this way,” Ryoga blushed and could only focus on the feel of her small hand in his. 'So soft' he mused.

Akane leaned in to whisper in Ranko's ear, giving her directions to Ryoga's place. She felt slightly guilty, but knew that if Ranko listened to Ryoga, they'd both be somwhere in China or America.

“Gotcha!”

========================

“S-so...” Ryoga brushed his fingers through his hair and shuddered as Ranko lightly squeezed his other hand.

“So...” she smiled.

Ryoga noticed how cute she looked as she smiled and felt himself sweat in nervousness. He felt it odd that he was so distressed around her since up until today, he had only really felt that way around Akane. He chalked it up to the fact that she was a girl and he was always a wreck around the opposite sex regardless of whether he liked them romantically or not.

“We should turn left here,” he said.

“Mmmhmm...” she just ignored him, deciding to go by the directions Akane had whispered to her earlier. Good thing she had a great memory.

Ryoga was a little hurt that she wasn't listening to him, but his logical mind concluded that if she did, they would have gotten lost. “Why is that Shampoo girl after you?”

“Oh... it started back in China,” she said while focused on the road ahead of them to Ryoga's house. “After dad and Ranma's botched up training session, we decided to look for food. We stopped at a little village not far from Jusenkyo called Joketsuzoku. That's where we found the only food within a mile radius. It was an all you can eat buffet... but unfortunately it belonged to one of the Chinese Amazons, Shampoo.”

“An Amazon?”

“Yeah. So anyway, being the ignorant fools they are, dad and Ranma set off to eat Shampoo's prize food. See, she had just won a fight against another Amazon so the food was given to her. Shampoo was outraged and challenged Ranma to a fight. She was good, but he was better, and he beat her.” she paused in her story telling and rounded another corner.

“Then, what happened next was really odd. She stood up and gave Ranma a kiss on the cheek. I was shocked to say the least, I mean, usually when you lose, you don't give the winner a kiss. Ranma was even more shocked,” she giggled.

“Turns out that the kiss Shampoo gave him was the Kiss of Death. I did some research once we got here, and the Kiss of Death is given by the female Joketuzoku Amazons to outsiders who defeat them in battle. Though there is one stipulation. For the Kiss of Death to be given, both members participating in the fight must be the same gender.”

“Ranma was still a girl?” Ryoga asked.

Ranko nodded and continued with her story, “Yep. But if they're not the same genders, then it becomes the Kiss of Marriage...”

“Why just female Joketsuzoku?”

“Because the male Amazons are the domestic partners. I think they're allowed to learn the fighting style, and even participate in their own prize fights, but the only ones privileged to give out Kiss of Death or Marriage are the females since the Joketsuzoku are a very female-centric village.”

There was a slow clap coming from behind and slightly above them. Then suddenly, Shampoo jumped from whichever roof she was on, and landed in front of the two. “Very good... you know Joketsuzoku well. But too bad it no help you when you decide to eat Shampoo prize food!”

“I didn't eat your food, crazy!” Ranko yelled.

“Come here and fight Shampoo... little boyfriend no help you!” Shampoo now had her chúi which looked a lot like medium sized beach balls on a stick, but Ranko decided they must be just as dangerous as any other weapon.

“I'm not her--”

“I am sick of being blamed for Ranma's offenses... this ends now!” Ranko let go of Ryoga's hand rather violently and entered a fighting stance.

“Finally... Shampoo think this get interesting,” Shampoo's fighting stance was more graceful, with her chúi in either hand – one pointing toward Ranko and the other in the air behind her. She balanced on one leg as the other was bent and her foot rested on her balanced leg.

“Wait!” Ranma – now in female form – somersaulted from same roof Shampoo was on just moments ago. “She didn't defeat you.”

“T-two?” Shampoo was surprised to say the least and said something in Mandarin. “N-no matter... Shampoo kill both.”

“No... let Ranko go. As I said, she didn't defeat you!”

“Then you defeat me?”

“Exactly...” Ranma got into her fighting stance. “Come at me!”

“Hmm... other pigtail girl... you off hook,” she yelled and pointed at Ranko. Then turned her attention to Ranma and charged at her. “After this, you no be able to humiliate Joketsuzoku no more!”

“He won't be able to humiliate anybody,” Ryoga said under his breath.

“Ryoga!” Ranko chided.

Ranma blocked the chúi that descended upon her with one hand and punched Shampoo in the stomach with the other, briefly sending her back a few steps. Shampoo smirked and somersaulted over the red-head, landing behind her and pushing her chúi into Ranma's back.

“Once again, Ranma has to step in...”

“Aren't you happy though... he's taking responsibility for something he did. He's not leaving you to be killed by some Amazon,” Ryoga said.

“I know... it's just that... he always jumps in when I'm in trouble,” she sighed. “Part of it's because I can't find in front of my dad... I'm sorry you had to be there for our spat last night, but you must understand by now. I don't want to disapoint him any further.”

“If I were your father, I'd be proud that you showed an interest in the one thing he loved more than anything...” he stated, still looking at the fight which looked like Ranma was winning all over again.

“Thank you Ryoga... that's sweet,” she smiled and returned her focus to the fight at hand. Her eyes widened as she saw that they inching ever closer to an old lady, watering the steps to her home with a ladle and bucket in her hands. “Ranma!” she gasped and could only watch in horror as the gap between them and the lady decreased. Ranko lept into action, running toward the old lady, and pushed her out of the way. Ranma tripped over Ranko's knealing form and immediately changed back into a male. The sight was enough to stop Shampoo in her tracks.

“He... he defeat Shampoo?”

“I think we've established that,” Ranko groaned and shrugged Ranma off of her with much effort.

“Thank you kind girl... I wasn't aware of these hooligans stirring up trouble in our streets. Would you care for some chocolate?” The old lady grabbed her ladle and bucket.

“Um no... thank you. It's my pleasure to have helped you out!” Ranko stood and dusted off her uniform, watching as the old lady re-entered her apartment.

“You is male...” Shampoo started.

“Oh boy,” Ranko slapped her hand over her forehead, sweeping it down over her whole face.

“What?” Ranma whispered.

“By Joketsuzoku law, if a man defeats a female Amazon, he has to marry her,” Ranko stated.

“What?”

Shampoo latched onto him, discarding her chúi into the street. “Wo ai ni!”

“Shit!”

Sorry if Shampoo pretty much gives up on Ranko quickly. If she hadn't, I was afraid that the story would be dragging on longer than needed.
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Those What Ifs