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As the Smoke Clears #4 in Rivalry Series	By : kurahieiritrJIO Category: +G to L > Initial D Views: 2635 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Initial D, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-As the Smoke Clears
- 2-Smoke 2
- 3-Smoke 3
- 4-Smoke 4
- 5-Smoke 5
- 6-Smoke 6
- 7-Smoke 7
- 8-Smoke 8
- 9-Smoke 9
- 10-Smoke 10
- 11-Smoke 11
- 12-Smoke 12
- 13-Smoke 13
- 14-Smoke 14
- 15-Some 15
- 16-Smoke 16
- 17-Chapter 17
- 18-Smoke 18
- 19-Smoke 19
- 20-Smoke 20
- 21-Smoke 21
- 22-Smoke 22
- 23-Smoke 23
- 24-Smoke 24
- 25-Smoke 25
- 26-Smoke 26
- 27-Smoke 27
- 28-Smoke 28
- 29-Smoke 29
- 30-Smoke 30
- 31-Smoke 31
- 32-Smoke 32
- 33-Smoke 33
- 34-Smoke 34
- 35-Smoke 35
- 36-Smoke 36
- 37-Smoke 37
- 38-Smoke 38
- 39-Smoke 39
- 40-Smoke 40
- 4
- 5
- 6
CHAPTER 5

(GRAPHIC LEMON SQUICK) *Torture and Rape Flashbacks

A smack across the back of his head crashed Itsuke's forehead into the steel bars of the cell. "Pay attention, Itsuke kun. Tung Tzu's not done with Fujiwara yet." The mountainous sized guard named Doi snarled near his ear.

Itsuke's shoulders and back burned from the caning while tied against the cell bars with his arms spread out. Unable to escape the ropes that kept his shoulders stretched out, Itsuke could only whimper as burning slithered and shifted across his bare skin. Still, he was in much better shape than Tak. The stitches had been redone, and bandaged up. It had to hurt like hell to be kept chained with his arms and legs spread in that fashion.

Facing Tak's losing battle, a fresh wave of hopelessness washed over Itsuke. Squirming as Tung Tzu shoved a knobby gadget into his ass, Tak looked as furiously sick as he felt. Standing beside his friend's head was the newest man to be brought into their cell. He was stroking himself into erection as he watched Tak's enraged struggle with real enjoyment it seemed. Itsuke silently cursed his inability to hold back cries of pain whenever Doi brought the flattened length of soaked bamboo across his shoulders at Tung Tzu's command. Tak was obviously caving because he could not stand hearing him in pain.

"Lewd is so lovely. Now, without biting this time, you will give your client a very good blow job, Fujiwara." Tung-Tzu instructed in a clipped tone.

With a silent snarl on his face, Tak opened his mouth and accepted the other man's dick getting thrust into it. If not for the guard monitoring him, Itsuke would have closed his eyes and tried to block the sight. Weak as Tak was after fighting to save Arai's teenaged sister a few days before, he was too injured to keep struggling like this. Tung Tzu was showing up with nude men from other parts of this compound who did disgusting things to Tak several times each day. Itsuke was desperately wishing he could block out everything happening to Tak.

"Start showing me some good suction, and tongue action. So far this blow job's lousy. You need to learn to roll that tongue, Fujiwara. Makes it feel so much better if you at least pretend enthusiasm. Otherwise your buddy will get beat again." The man ruthlessly choking Tak with his dick was saying. Even being a few steps away from Tak, Itsuke could see the murderous emerald sparks flashing in his best friend's eyes. Bound hands compulsively clenched before Tak could curb his reaction.

Dissolving into a swirl of smoke, the scene vanished.

Chiasa's voice pounded his ears as Itsuke stared at the carpet under his feet. "The submissive personality calls the shots without speaking. Seme personalities respond to whatever their submissive wants because of their instinct to follow the submissive's subtle cues to make them happy. A cunning submissive can control the greatest powerhouse seme's actions quite easily. A talented submissive could easily control Fujiwara by putting their mind to it and using their body language consciously. Handling him is going to come down to the talents of the submissive introduced into the mix. Considering Fujiwara can't stand you getting tortured, I'd lay bets on your ability to solve Fujiwara's rebelliousness, and save minasan from needless damage, especially Fujiwara himself."

"Eh? Nani are you saying?" Itsuke demanded feeling his unease growing into an unstoppable need to escape. His eyes met the big busted female trainer's eyes.

"You need to learn how to understand body types and language signals that bodies give off to protect Fujiwara from himself, Itsuke. Kahori sama is having Tung-Tzu use a very dangerous aphrodisiac to force his sexual compliance right now. It's getting used twice a day which means that he's being conditioned to become a nymphomaniac. If you learn the benefits of consciously using sweet spots to create prolonged orgasms, Fujiwara will become more tractable. In this place anyone that fails to be quite useful dies, Itsuke. Like it or not, you can control Fujiwara, and save yourself."

Another dizzying shift in his surroundings had all the force of flying over a cliff face and plummeting into a deeper place.

Itsuke felt a thick padded beam supporting his torso. His wrists, thighs and lower legs were bound with thick leather straps so he could not get loose. He was unable to shake the strange smelling smoke's cloying effect. Knowing that he was in a prone position with his bare ass hanging out and getting molested by complete strangers turned his stomach. With the blindfold over his eyes, he could see nothing. However, for all that, curiosity was making Itsuke wonder if this strangely good, yet mentally revolting sensation was how Tak felt during every one of Tung Tzu's training sessions.

"Stop it! You've gone way too far with this joke of yours! This isn't the least bit funny, damn it!"

"Chiasa, would you put this where it'll do the most good. Once I get him warmed up, I guarantee he'll stop complaining." The mystery man named Sadami was saying.

Not knowing anything but the physical cues touch gave him, Itsuke felt his jaws pried open. Some kind of hard rubbery object was forced into his mouth. He felt pressure against the back of his head that constricted all the way to his mouth, and settled against his skin. Chiasa had gagged him.

The strong grip fell from his chin allowing Itsuke to move his head again. The pressure on his anal ring increased more with every circling movement made until he felt something pushing into his body. Again he tensed and shivered. Okiku continued talking as a hand wrapped around his dick and began stroking him into arousal in spite of his fear and disgust.

"Focus on the pleasure that can be had with anyone so you'll survive, Itsuke kun. You can thrive on it if you shift your thinking. Whether you're with onnas or men won't matter if you can find the place in your head that lets you imagine you're with someone worth your time. Once you find that place, even the lousiest and most selfish jerks become fuckable. You create a fantasy, and go into it just far enough that you can still pay attention to the people you are servicing without them being your truth. Now, pick someone you would really like to fuck and imagine it's them touching you. Do you understand, Itsuke kun?"

The pressure that Itsuke suspected was coming from a finger continued pushing forward. Sensations increased and shifted making Itsuke wish he could effectively squirm free. It wasn't painful, but he certainly felt violated. Was this feeling the same as Tak experienced several times a day when Tung-Tzu tortured him? Much to Itsuke's relief, the finger or whatever it might be, was pulling out. Before it exited his rectum, it reversed course, and moved deeper inside his body. Surprisingly his sphincter sent a sharp set of messages flashing up his spine, and into his dick. Itsuke jerked and gasped through his nose over the eerie jolt.

Blinded, Itsuke fell into the insistent images forming in his mind. His fear was unable to counter the drugged smoke that kept his mind locked in a floating haze. Strangely Tak's face welded to his mind's eye. Memories of their crashing on his bed together when they were small morphed into curled together on a larger bed. Tak's voice was dominating his hearing, though for some reason the hesitantly rough quality had slipped away. The intonation he knew so well was replaced by a softly hypnotic cadence he could not escape.

"Taboos are nothing but lies to keep people from seeking different pleasures they can have. Onnas can provide one level of pleasure, the same as masturbation provides a different pleasure. Screwing men can add new dimensions to that list if you're willing to play uke. The best sex I've ever had is screwing two people at once. I have some regulars, a kinky married couple that I service every month. I bone the onna while her husband bones me in the ass, Itsuke. Your reactions already tell me that you're getting a very small dose of how intensely good that kind of action can feel."

Confusion clouded Itsuke's mind. Tak's fingers were driving him wild in the most unthinkable ways, and he could not recall having agreed to any of this. His fear melted as he saw Tak smile with that new and hypnotic voice filling his ears. "You know you really are gorgeously hung, Itsuke kun. Giving you head will be nearly impossible because you're so thick. I'm not sure if I can handle your girth for intercourse either."

Itsuke was spiraling into a new direction. More images flashed past at hyper speed in a jumble that he could not sort out. Things settled into sensations as images collided and collapsed without rhyme or reason.

The previously repressed sexuality inside himself was taking over more of his awareness with each time Chiasa took him from his cell to participate in her classes. Itsuke found himself following very graphic instructions about giving head. The noises he succeeded in dragging out of the man he was sucking on increased his own arousal. Learning these things was his only chance of keeping himself and Tak alive. Even so, Itsuke could no longer deny that he was enjoying the lessons.

Due to Chiasa's plan, Itsuke could save them both by simply embracing desire. Tak was getting more violent and meaner with each day. The drugging continued with Tak fighting the hardest each morning, and caving from exhaustion to the inevitable every afternoon. Because of his vicious fights, sometimes Tung Tzu allowed the guards to exact their revenge by ganging up on Tak's prone body. Other times a single man from the prostitution stable would do various things with Tak based upon whatever orders were given. Chiasa's plan would make it possible to save Tak from the guards if he learned enough to keep Tak in line quickly. Itsuke could barely wait for Chiasa to report to Kahori with their training sessions the next time she was called upstairs. Hot cum spurted against his throat drawing Itsuke's thoughts back to his lesson.

Again the images were shifting, dissolving, whirling, and changing as he tumbled through the jumble of resurfacing and unwanted memories.

His ears picked up the sound of something tearing and crinkling in front of him. Something cool and tight was sliding down his engorged rod, encasing him. Too tight, stinging pressure settled around the base of his throbbing arousal. Squirming with discomfort as best he could, Itsuke wished he could withdraw deeper into himself until he no longer felt anything at all. Another kind of gliding over his rigid sex began.

Something odd, warm and much thicker than fingers was moving along his crack. Shuddering, Itsuke knew he was about to fully understand Tak's repetitive hell in graphic sensory detail. Mental images he was trying to protect himself with crashed as Itsuke's body registered something new was happening.

Feelings of a hot thickness swirling and pushing lightly against his asshole became more insistent. An equally warm pressure against his sensitive head derailed all attempts to retreat inside himself to a place deep enough to lose all awareness of his body. Irritating, frightening, and somehow sensually provoking, Itsuke's body was melting into the combination of sensations despite his shrieking mental alarms. His mind could not control his drugged muscles. Bound and unable to put up any kind of struggle, Itsuke could only dangle inside the cage.

Pressure against his sphincter increased, opening his body as the thick heat of another man's dick pressed into his body. His ring was sending the strangest messages to Itsuke's brain. The pain was far less than he had expected. His unwanted partner drew back slightly, not enough to completely withdraw from his ass, but close. He slipped his erection deeper, rotating his hips as he moved. Itsuke realized how completely his ass was getting violated. Each taunting movement of the cock slowly grinding into his body shot wild messages up his spine and into his dick. Itsuke shuddered as some part of himself anticipated the next motion, even clamored for it against his mind's frantic attempts to fight his attacker off.

Another shift and dropping sensation occurred as his mind twisted within his sleep. A physical change in sensations flashed along his spine, overriding his desire to escape.

Tied up yet again in Chiasa's training cage as the main object of everyone's attention, Itsuke did not have the excuse of drugged smoke to block his understanding that he was enjoying everything happening to him. The same as in the previous sessions, he was blindfolded. Getting touched by unknown hands was now familiar. Helpless to prevent others from stroking his body into arousal, Itsuke felt himself quivering in anticipation. A hot thick shaft slid against his chin. Without hesitation, he took it into his mouth. Feeling his prone rear getting fondled made his erection fill more. Whatever Sadami had done to him, Itsuke was now hooked on the sensation of a hot dick filling his body and driving him insane.

Before he could become enamored of the shifting sensations beginning to flow through him, Itsuke was jerked from that place and time.

His manhood's head was being surrounded by tight quivering heat. A gasp and several deep breaths caught his ears. "Kami-sama, so thick. . . . even at my maximum relaxation, . . . you're girth is almost tearing, . . . my sphincter, Itsuke kun."

Feeling increased as his shaft was slowly drawn deeper into the gyrating warmth of Okiku's body. Shuddering, Itsuke could not deny how good it felt as the other man backed onto his rigid cock. Far more intense and enthralling than any hand had ever managed, more of his shaft was engulfed by Okiku's hot tight anal canal. Holding tightly to his hips so he could not move, Sadami continued to tease him into submitting completely to his sexual mastery as his hot meat sank into Itsuke's depths.

Day dreams of being in Tak's arms firmly entrenching in his mind's eye, Itsuke succumbed to the devious actions of his main trainers. Sensations flooded his system as they moved in sync with each other. Almost before he understood everything he felt, hard contractions were gripping and sucking his sensitive head deeper into the hot channel surrounding his cock. Sounds that he could not fully grasp shifted in tone and resonance as his balls tightened and ached for completion. The strong measured pace of Sadami's sensually rotating cock pumping into his ass continued pushing him mercilessly higher.

On some level he knew he was twisting on a hospital bed while asleep, and not being used as the classroom fuck doll. That realization calmed Itsuke's sudden flush of guilty rage at the things he was doing. Still the images flowed and shifted as his dreams tormented him over the role he had willingly played.

Pleasure was trapped at painful heights that Itsuke could not get beyond because his erection was blocked by a cock ring. He could not ejaculate. Desperation to fall into final release had his body writhing and shifting within the hold of the man thrusting into him. He was getting far hotter from arousing stimulation he doubted he could endure any longer. His cock and balls screamed from the pressure build up of too long denied release.

Extreme internalized waves of spinning, crackling overflow from his ass into the core of his tormented manhood kept his canal rippling and convulsing, sucking and grabbing at the hot meat that was slamming into his body. Wave after wave of pleasure coursed along his spine until Itsuke's awareness was completely drowning in sensory overload. Still, he remained trapped at the plateau shy of final orgasm by the ring around his root.

A hand was shaking him awake. Twisting to the side while trying to jump away, Itsuke struggled awake. "Take it easy, Takeuchi. You were having some nightmare. I thought you would rather wake up than stay caught in whatever it was." Fumihiro's soft voice drew his rapidly blinking eyes into focus.

"Uh, oh, um, domo, Fumihiro-san." Itsuke's eyes took in the hospital room with rows of beds. Some had patients in them, while others were getting made by others getting ready to leave the room.

This was not the compound. Muscles that had gone rigid began to unknot as Itsuke took a deep breath and brushed sweaty hair off his forehead. As his hand slid down his cheek, ridged masses of scarring caught his peripheral vision. The missing nubs where fingers had resided were vicious reminders of Chiasa's cruel betrayal.

"Ne, Takeuchi, are you okay?" His eyes refocused to see Fumihiro's hand waving slowly in front of his face. Nodding, Itsuke let his mangled hand drop to his side. From the other man's expression, Itsuke could see questions left unasked by the older man.

"The newscast will be starting soon. Want to grab a comfortable seat before the room gets packed?" Fumihiro asked him.

Another nod followed as Itsuke turned toward the main door so he could compose himself by taking several deep breaths to silence his half-aroused state. A trip to the bathroom would deflect any suspicions Fumihiro might have. Everything he had locked away in the cocoon he had created inside the compound was crashing, leaving Itsuke no place to hide from everything he had done.

Fumihiro was a decent looking man, but Itsuke refused to allow his newfound sexuality to cajole him into making another huge mistake. He had learned a very painful lesson in the compound. Itsuke knew he had lost far more than his virginity in that place. He had gambled on a long shot and lost his pride, self image, body parts, heart, and soul. The first four days in this hospital, Itsuke had been his old self. On the fifth day, his memories began to unlock, triggered by the first dream of losing his innocence while drugged. During his later consensual training, Itsuke had been fondled and screwed in so many ways under Chiasa's instructions, he had lost count. His partners had done so many things to him. He caved to his body's sensations while shutting off his mind.

Sadly, his trainers had not needed to do all that much to make his body scream for sex. Everything that Sadami and Okiku did to him when they ganged up on him and took his virginity had triggered a landslide of sexuality. That energy had shattered the proverbial closet containing his sexual identity completely. Somehow it had also turned him into a hardcore homosexual, or at least made him aware of that part's existence. Too long repressed and denied, Itsuke had not simply come out of the closet, his sexual appetites exploded into a wild experimentation with anyone that had a dick, and even women interested in his dick's larger than normal girth. Walking into the bathroom, Itsuke brooded in a private stall.

'Keisuke san was open and honest about his feelings, unlike me. He charged into a massacre to save Tak armed with nothing but a baseball bat. He got hurt fighting to save Tak's life. I've got to make sure Tak stays with Keisuke san so he can be happy again. That's all that really matters. I'm nothing but a weapon against Tak. Keisuke san's the one strong enough to be with Tak, . . . and not fail at being good for him. As much as I love Tak, I'm dangerous to him. Anytime someone needs a convenient weapon, they can use me. There's nothing I can do to stop it except vanish from Tak's life. He'll be hurt by it at first, but there's nothing else I can do to make sure he's happier in the future.'

'Keisuke san will take care of him so well that Tak'll barely notice I'm gone for long. I have to do this for Tak. Damn, I wish things had turned out differently. If Chiasa had kept her word that she was trying to save our asses from Taihei, going along with her plan wouldn't be crushing me like this. But the lying little bitch used and betrayed me. Now I understand just how underhanded onnas really are. I can't blame Tak for choosing Keisuke over Mogi now that I know.

'Everything that the overseers did to spark Tak's sexuality into the same unbelievable drive mine's in failed miserably in that place. The only way they could get him hard was the fucking aphrodisiac. They had to beat the hell out of me to get him to do anything with his boners. Even when he was high as hell and in agony, Tak only wanted Keisuke san. Tak honestly loves Keisuke san so much he was willing to take hellish pain and damage to avoid screwing anyone else. I know that he'll be happy with Keisuke san again.'

His thoughts left Itsuke without the necessary desire to pick up the pieces of himself and move forward. Survival meant nothing in the wake of so many shocking discoveries. Without a doubt, he was lost, and emptier than he had ever dreamed possible. In the aftermath of the compound's sensually lined brutality, a void was taking over his emotions place. Dreaming about kissing, touching, and getting loved by Tak kept him miserable. He had discovered that he loved his best friend in all the wrong ways. Trying to shove those feelings back into the shattered closet of a newly discovered deviant nature was an utter failure.

Silence was all he had left. Memories of how it felt to be kissed by, and getting head from Tak was all he would ever have of his best friend. That knowledge hurt. That moment Itsuke cherished. Having been in pain induced shock and panic when it happened did not matter to him. Throughout his degradation, Itsuke had used Okiku's advice as a shield to protect himself. Inserting Tak's face over individuals that used his body made it easy to toss them into the cocoon he built around his mind. There had been a slim chance of reaching Tak while they were prisoners. In the end, he had jumped whole heartedly onto Chiasa's plan to save Tak's life. Itsuke had agreed even though he knew he would only be a substitute for Takahashi Keisuke.

'Come to think of it, Mitani was sort of like Tak. Both of them wanted Keisuke san and nobody else. She died in that hell hole. It pisses me off that I haven't got a chance of competing with Keisuke san to catch Tak's attention. How the hell can any man be so fucking perfect, and unbelievably lucky as to catch the best lovers around?

'Hell, after everything I've learned, I'm not capable of turning Tak on like Keisuke san because he'll never love me like he does Keisuke. Mitani said my cock's just as thick, but a little shorter than his too. He's got me beat in looks, wealth, class, driving skills, fighting ability, and even in that respect. At least Mitani didn't have any complaints outside of having to get Kagehiko to help get me to my maximum hardness. Kagehiko needs to get pointers from Sadami about really hitting sweet spots the right way. Too bad Sadami was already back in the slut houses when Mitani decided to teach me a few things. The first time I was too high to really appreciate how well Sadami knows how to work his dick. I suppose that's the reason Keisuke san seems so irresistible to Tak. Men like that have way too much power over the rest of us when they choose to use it. In fact Mitani said with some practice I could be a match for Keisuke san. Too bad I'll never get that practice in.'

'Ugh, I don't believe I just thought that! Wanting to get used again is really twisted. How could I get this messed up, so damned fast? It's bad enough finding out that I'm gay, love getting fucked in the ass, and that I'm nuts in love with Tak. Damn Chiasa for having Sadami give my sweet spot such intense goosing that I'm craving it. Sure as hell broke me out of my denial about being gay, but I really wish I wasn't remembering everything. Baka, stop thinking about it or you'll get another boner. How the hell am I supposed to shut this off?'

Remorse and disgust over his naivety dug deeper into his soul every time Itsuke closed his eyes. Self derision was leaving a bloody trail of shredded chunks of his heart and soul in its wake. The dreams were getting more horrifying with every recalled sexual response he had given to strangers fondling, and violating him. Desperation was no excuse for having cooperated, and even responded to many of the sexual experiences he had gotten.

'Kind of surprising that Kahori sama didn't grab Hikaru on her way out. She's as possessive of Hikaru as she's obsessed with getting her claws into Keisuke san. The rumors said she was training him to be her heir. So naze did she leave him behind?'

Resenting Keisuke san because of his having Tak really sucks. He saved me from Taihei. I know he honestly loves Tak. He has helped Tak in so many ways. With Keisuke san, Tak was happy, and I knew it. Tak deserves to be happy after everything he's been through. That's all I really want, but it hurts like hell knowing I've never been able to give Tak that. Wish I didn't resent Keisuke san for giving Tak everything he's ever wanted so effortlessly. Wouldn't suck so much if I could just see him putting real effort into making Tak happy.'

Compounding Itsuke's shame was having seen Keisuke san's private hell as he pleaded with Tak to wake from his coma. Seeing the older man's overpowering anguish had hurt Itsuke deeply. He understood the handsome street racer's suffering better than the older man would ever know. If anyone understood that much pain, it was now himself. He had let Tak go twice in hopes the one he loved most would be happy.

Itsuke looked at his maimed hand as he washed them knowing that whatever was left of himself would gladly get sacrificed to protect Tak's happiness. That was the major difference between himself and Keisuke san he decided. Unlike himself, Keisuke would fight to keep Tak even if it meant Tak was unhappy the dark haired youth thought privately. Dropping his hand, Itsuke left the bathroom and seeing that Fumihiro had left, dropped back onto his bed.

Recognizing that he was nothing more than a close sentimental bond from childhood that Tak could not abandon after habitually protecting him for so long was the liability he presented. Friendship was all Tak could accept from him which he had to be fine with before he saw him again. Yet, Kahori's orders that he be the one to evaluate Tak's prowess had probably destroyed everything between them. He dreaded Tak's memory of that day returning. Tak would blame himself. Worst of all, Tak would be horrified over his actions once those memories began to surface. The way Kahori sama ordered his hand mangled made it obvious that nobody had told her about his involvement in Chiasa's training sessions. Shocked by Chiasa's betrayal into the deepest levels of denial possible, Itsuke knew he had regressed into a much earlier state of being. Something inside himself locked everything that happened in the compound even deeper into that cocoon of elaborate deceptions he had woven around himself. The temporary loss of memory was so complete Itsuke even forgot his acceptance of being head over heels in love with Tak. Kahori's orders that they should screw each other had registered on Tak's face as heartbreaking desperation. Itsuke had argued with the person that could kill him with a snap of her fingers to protect Tak's heart, instead of his own life without regret.

Tak, his spaced out best friend thankfully remained unaware of his long denied feelings. Being insensible from the drug, Itsuke hoped he never recalled that encounter. Completely clueless as to the things happening after he passed out after every torture session, Tak had a chance of healing completely. Tak would have been devastated by the discoveries he would have made if he had not almost stopped breathing when he finished giving him that incredible blow job. The same Tak that Itsuke prayed would always stay ignorant to his repeated heartbreaks from silently letting his darling crush go to others.

On some level he was completely revolted by his overwhelming appetite, while on others, Itsuke had reveled in every experience. His body was still betraying him. Much to his ongoing outrage, he found himself in the middle of a group of quasi strangers surreptitiously scanning every grown male patient's crotch that came into sight. Aware of the clues he was picking up from each flaccid member's potential by the way they filled their pajama pants, Itsuke ground his teeth. Chiasa, Sadami and Okiku had done their job of turning him into a whore quite well.

During Itsuke's counseling sessions, Leamas sama's interpreter explained that he had been hypnotized into performing sexual acts he would never allow if given any choice. Getting told that he had been unable to resist his 'rapes' did little to help. No amount of reassurance that his newly awakening voracious sexuality or complicated feelings would pass could erase the horrible truth. The prescription medication subdued his feelings enough that Itsuke could keep a lid on everything. Still, it would never submerge his new reality so deeply he could forget about it ever again.

Part of Itsuke hated the Gaijin specialist's answers. He equally feared these deeply rooted feelings now haunting him. Hiding was a hard-wired habit that Itsuke could not break. Having lost his ability to lie to himself did not mean he couldn't hide from others. With so many dirty little secrets plaguing him, Itsuke had little that he dared say.

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As the Smoke Clears #4 in Rivalry Series