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Hidden Be Thy Heart	By : alucardsangel1973 Category: Hellsing > General Views: 8509 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Hellsing, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 5
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Part 6

Alucard materialized in his chamber. Seras sat on the bed with her knees up to her chest. "Is she upset?" She asked.

"Very upset. I knew there would be consequences for my actions. I had him, and I was ready to kill him. I was ready to make him suffer as he had made you suffer. But Integra managed to find where I was and stopped me before I could sink my fangs into the bastard." Alucard replied.

"I'm sorry master. This is my fault. If I hadn't gotten caught then Sir Integra would not be angry with you now." Seras said.

"I told you don't blame yourself. I willingly disobeyed my master's orders. Nobody forced me to do what I did. I'll take the consequences of my disobedience. The only thing that stopped me from killing Sarlis was Integra threatened to put me back into the death like sleep I'd endured for 20 years before she found me. In any other circumstance I wouldn't have cared. It would have been terribly inconvenient, but I would have dealt with it. But I could not let her put me back into that damnable suspended animation knowing you are still my servant." Alucard explained.

"Master, why did you offer to turn me? I would have understood that you would have had to kill me to destroy the vampire target. I understood when I joined D-11 that my life would always be in peril. I accepted that fact. I mean, I'm not trying to be ungrateful. I just..."

"You don't have to explain police girl. Normally I could care a less about the fates of humans. They make their beds and then refuse to lie in them. But you did not ask for the situation you got put into. You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. I didn't feel it right that your life should end so senselessly because I saw potential in you. And perhaps it was also that mine is a lonely existence. Before I met you I was the only vampire in an organization of vampire slayers. Most see me as a tool, a killing machine. Even Integra for the most part does not see that there is more to me than that.� Alucard said.

He sighed and then continued. �The only human I ever respected as a compatriot was Walter. I've known him ever since he was a young man. I respect Sir Integra, but she is my master. There is a certain amount of respect owed the master by the servant. It doesn't mean we always see eye to eye. Integra often sees herself as superior and infallible, where as I know otherwise. You are the only other vampire in Hellsing beside myself. You are more than just a servant and a partner. You are the only companion with whom I can truly relate to." Alucard explained.

"Someday police girl you will claim your freedom from me. Someday you will become a free vampire when you are ready. Do not blame yourself for not drinking my blood that day I ordered you to do it. You were not ready, and I could not make you be ready. Only you will know the right time."

"Master, you really feel that way?" Seras asked.

"I know I rarely show this side of myself to anyone, but you are different. Even though you are not a free vampire you are still a vampire none the less. I drank your blood and gave you mine. I know you will understand what I say where humans will not." Alucard answered.

"Master, I...I think I can sleep in my own coffin now. I'll be all right." Seras said.

"That would be just as well. I don't want you to be here when Integra comes for me. She is going to be quite furious because of my actions. You've been through quite enough of an ordeal already. Go back to your chamber. Your transfusion blood is waiting for you. Drink and get your strength back up." Alucard replied.

"Yes master."

As soon as Seras left his chamber, Alucard sat in his chair. He was back in his usual clothes, dark Victorian outfit, red coat and hat. He knew he had hell to pay for what he did, but he didn't care. As long as he could take care of Seras was all he cared about. He did what he did, and would have done it again if he had to. No one was going to harm one of his own and get away with it.

.................................................................................................

The passage of the day did nothing to cool Integra's temper. She was still furious with the fact that her servant had dared to disobey her. Walter knocked on the door hesitantly. "I don't want to be disturbed!" Integra shouted.

"Sir Integra, I know you're very upset, but may I have a word with you?" He asked nervously.

Integra was about to tell the steward to go away but decided it was perhaps wise to hear what he had to say. He could calm her anger when no one else could.
"All right fine. Come in." She said with a scowl.

Walter opened the door.
"Sir Integra, I know this is not my place, but I felt I needed to talk to you about what has transpired with Alucard." Walter replied.

"This is not your problem Walter. I expressly forbade him to leave the mansion. I told him not to do anything against Sarlis. He told me he understood. He not only disobeyed me he lied to me as well! I cannot and will not tolerate such blatant insubordination from him!" Integra barked.

"Sir Integra, with all due respect put yourself in Alucard's place. Miss Victoria is one of his and he felt Sarlis committed a grave offense against her." Walter said.

"I know Alucard doesn't like anything happening to his little pet but orders are orders. He got her back. I would have had Sarlis dealt with but there was vital information he could have supplied us with. Now thanks to what Alucard has done the man will probably end up spending the rest of his days in a mental institution. He's been driven so mad that any information he could have given us about the freak chip is unreachable now. I will not have Alucard do this again, and I intend to make sure that when he is given orders he obeys them. He's going to get his head yelled off when I see him. He'll be lucky I don't take his head off literally." Integra fumed.

"As you wish Sir Integra." Walter said with a small bit of a scowl in his voice.

"Walter, don't tell me you think Alucard should not be disciplined for his behavior. You of all people know what is at stake in this organization. What if Alucard had gone so mad that outside influences caught site of his activities? What if that mansion hadn't been so remotely located? Do you realize the magnitude of what could have happened, and how many lives would have been affected by it?" Integra asked sternly.

"I'm not saying anything Sir Integra. It wasn't my place." Walter said and left Integra's office.

.................................................................................................

Alucard sat in his chamber. He finished off a glass of blood. He heard his phone ring. He didn't pick up the receiver. Instead he turned the intercom on.

"Alucard, get your undead ass up here right now!" Integra barked.

"Well, it was a good thing I didn't pick up the phone. Her voice would have blasted my head off." Alucard said to himself turning the intercom off. He disappeared from his chamber and materialized in Integra's office.

"You called master?" Alucard asked with a smirk.

"Wipe that ridiculous smirk off your face Alucard. I'm not in a joking mood." Integra fumed.

"Are you ever in a joking mood?" Alucard asked sarcastically.

"Damnit! I gave you a direct order! No, I gave you two direct orders, and you disobeyed them both! And not only that but you lied to me as well! You told me you would not leave these grounds and that you would do nothing against Sarlis without my permission!" Integra shouted.

"How exactly did I lie to you?" Alucard asked.

"You told me you understood my orders! You told me you would not leave!" Integra yelled.

"I said yes master. I said what you wanted to hear. I didn't tell you I would not leave. I did not tell you I understood why you wanted me to stay. I simply gave you a servant's answer to a master's question." Alucard replied.

"What the hell are you talking about! I told you to stay put, but you didn't! You put every one of Hellsing's lives at risk! You knew why I wanted Sarlis left alone until I could interrogate him! What if he'd had information about the freak chip? What if he knew something we didn't? Now we'll never know because even though you didn't kill him you've driven him thoroughly mad!" Integra shouted.

"Yes, far more than he deserves, but I at least managed to do that much to him." Alucard stated.

"I could care a less what you did to him afterwards, but I gave you a direct order! How am I supposed to trust you now with such blatant insubordination? How am I supposed to let you go on a mission and trust you to take out only the target? What if you decide you're going to go native on me and kill anyone who just happens to piss you off?" Integra asked furiously.

"I didn't do what I did purely for myself master. I did it to avenge her suffering. I was not about to let the bastards get away with the crimes they committed against the police girl." Alucard replied calmly.

"Your duty is to hunt down and destroy unearthly creatures who pose a threat to the crown, the church and citizens of England. You are not a vigilante Alucard. You are an agent of this organization and my servant! You obey my orders not your own! I make the missions here not you!" Integra yelled.

"And I will not allow human trash to commit obscene offenses against one of my own. I'm not particularly concerned whether or not you approved of it. But I did what needed to be done." Alucard said firmly.

"Like you're someone to be telling me the difference between right and wrong! How many people suffered at your hands Alucard? How many innocent lives did you take?" Integra asked sharply.

"I did not say I was blameless. I am a killer, and I do not deny that fact. But you're no more blameless than I am." Alucard pointed out.

"I didn't blatantly kill people to satisfy some insane lust. I do what I am told. I serve the queen as you serve me." Integra said.

" I know what my job is." Alucard replied.

"Well obviously you need reminding of something because suddenly you don't know how to obey orders!" Integra snapped.

"One of my own was wronged. I could not stand by and let it continue to go unpunished." Alucard said.

"I cannot have you killing every person who mistreats your little pet. Now you understand this..."

"No master, you understand this. She is not my pet. She is not my toy. I made her a vampire even though I didn't have to yes. I sometimes find amusement in your jealousy of her I admit that. She is my vampire child. I made her from my blood. I took her own blood into myself. She is a part of me as I am a part of her. I do not see her as a mere servant.� Alucard replied sternly.

�Do you have any idea how lonely the centuries can be master? Do you have any idea what it's like being the only vampire in the service of humans? Do you have any idea what it's like to watch so many of your own be slaughtered just because they were what they were? I don't regret killing the vampire trash that litters this world. Freaks are beneath my contempt even more so than humans are. I know what she is going through master. I know what it is to be tortured to the point I was praying for death! I was not going to stand by and watch those bastards do what they did and get away with it! " Alucard thundered.

Integra was taken aback by this sudden outburst. His eyes glowed with rage and his fangs glittered in the lamplight. Integra could not believe what she saw. She'd never seen Alucard show such emotion. She always assumed he didn't feel that kind of emotion. Her temper was quickly subdued by Alucard's own rage. He'd tried so hard to hide what was in his heart but that heart could no longer be hidden. It would show itself. Integra stood in stunned silence.

"I saw her suffering. I felt it. I could see her crying out for mercy. I could see her being humiliated. And even through all she suffered never once did she betray me. Never once did she betray you master. She never once betrayed your precious Hellsing family. She would have had every right to tell Sarlis everything he wanted to know just to make the pain stop, but she didn't. She endured pain you couldn't possibly imagine. But if you see so fit to punish me for what I did, then do it. Put me back in that damnable death sleep if you think it necessary. But what happens to the police girl will be on YOUR hands, not mine! I did what I had to do!"

Integra couldn't say anything against him. She'd never before seen a vampire shed tears. She didn't know just how deeply what happened to Victoria had affected Alucard.

"I am her master, but I am also her father. I am her mentor, her guardian. I'm her companion as she is mine. Do what you must to me, but I would have done it again if I had to." Alucard said harshly wiping away a blood tear.

"Alucard, I..." Integra began. She tried to find something to say, but found there were no words she could utter.

"Just go back to your chamber Alucard. Just go back to your chamber." Was all she could say.

She turned away for a moment to reach for a cigar and found Alucard was gone. She went to her chair and sat down. She picked up her lighter and lit the cigar and took a drag off of it.

"Damnit Alucard. How do you always find a way to prove me wrong?" She asked herself.

to be continued...
- 5
- 6
- 7
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Hidden Be Thy Heart