Random Parodies
folder
+. to F › Angel Sanctuary
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
10
Views:
2,343
Reviews:
3
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0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
+. to F › Angel Sanctuary
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
10
Views:
2,343
Reviews:
3
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Angel Sanctuary, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Mmm... Banana
Disclaimer: We don\'t own any of the Angel Sanctuary characters, if you didn\'t figure that out with the first 5 chapters.
“...helllllllllllllllllllloooo... HELLO! Any body there, it\'s pulling my hair!!\" Finally the glue wears off, and Haley falls to the floor with a \'flop\', leaving a large chunk of hair in her wake. \"Well, I guess the glue finally wore off then, huh?\" Maddie says, a bit disappointed. \"Great. now she\'s going to try and grope me again, and Sir Rosiel is not here to stop the inevitable.\" (A/N I don\'t know where he went) Katan says. \"But first, I want revenge.\" Haley says, pulling out a banana. \"What the hell are you going to do with a banana? And isn\'t revenge something that I would do, you don’t seem like that sort of person, or whatever the hell you are.\" Maddie says. \"But Maddie\'s the one that that said to throw food at you, not me.\" \"But I\'ve always wanted to do this.\" she whined. With that she unpeeled the banana and smeared it all over his face, saying, \"Mmmm banana.\"^_^ (A/N I did that to my friend at lunch one day, thats where I got the idea) At that moment, Rosiel walks in and says, \"That wasn\'t a banana, was it?\" \"Why?\" \"HES ALLERGIC TO BANANAS!\" \"Since when am I allergic to bananas?\" Katan says before promptly passing out on the dirty floor of the church. FLUMP!! (A/N I don’t know what sort of reaction that is, but this is fiction, it\'ll work.Oh, and \"FlUMP\" was the sound of him falling) \"So how do we go about waking him up?\" Haley asked. \"Who said anything about waking him up?\" Maddie retorts. All three slowly look up at each other.
(insert battle for Katan here)
--- CAERFUL, NASTY PART---About an hour later, Katan wakes up in extreme discomfort, face down on Rosiel\'s mattress. \"Why is it that when ever something bad happens, it always gets worse for me?\" He says, wincing at an incredibly hard thrust from Rosiel. \"Oh, come now, it isn’t THAT bad, you know it.\" Rosiel says a bit breathlessly. \"Not in your opinion, and besides, your on top, not on the receiving end.\" \"Oh stop whining.\" Rosiel finishes, in both senses, and collapses on top of a sore Katan. He pulls out and lays down next to him, pulling Katan close and cradling him to his chest, nuzzling the top of Katan’s head. Noting that his hair feels like spun silk, and that he’s so soft and sweet. ---END---
Then, because this is our parody, the sweet, limeish tender moment was interrupted by soft \"awwws\" coming from that shadowy corners of the room. At that, Haley tackles the bed, jarring the other two slightly. Maddie saunters over to the bed. \"Next time, make it a little more kinky, with biting and blood drinking, and hand cuffs, oh, and lots of painful shouts, I like painful shouts, and...\" She is cut off by a nervous looking Katan, saying, \"Shut up before he gets any ideas! Its bad enough that he does it while I\'m incapacitated, but if he does all of that while I\'m awake, well that would just suck.\" Maddie just snickers. \"No, but you would.\" \"Will you two go away, we’re trying to have an intimate moment here, and you two are messing it up, a lot.\" Rosiel complained. \"Don’t worry, it wasn\'t working. I was just about to turn over, ignore you and go to sleep. Even if your asleep, sex wears you out.\" Katan muttered, doing exactly what he said he planned to do, only then realizing that Haley was right next to him, and ended up face to face with her. \"Hi BIRDYMAN. You two have really entertaining sex, did you know that?\" she said, clinging to him. \"See, when ever things get bad, it always gets worse for me. I\'m stuck between a horny fan girl and that male equivalent to one.\" Rosiel starts to try to shove Haley off HIS Katan, but being that his Katan is in the way, its a pretty hard task. (A/N pretty like Katan ^_^)
(insert struggle here)
Eventually, Haley and Katan both end up on the floor, and before Rosiel could drag him back on the bed so he couldn\'t get away or Haley got to him, she licked his cheek and said, \"You taste like yum.\" Maddie, then licks his cheek and said \"Yuck, you taste like semen and Haley spit.\" (A/N No, I don’t know what that tastes like) At that moment, Ira chooses to reveal him self by saying, \"Regardless of what his cheeks taste like, I bet his blood tastes good, angel blood always does.\" And with lightning fast speed, he runs up and sinks his teeth into his neck. After about three and a half minutes, not draining Katan completely, but barely conscience, afterwards, letting him drop to the bed. \"Hm, not bad, not bad at all...\" He murmured, satisfied. Rosiel, being a bit on the over protective side (A/N Like Haley’s ass hole dad...) Put both hands to the side of his face and said, \"What have you done to my Katan!\" \"Well, I drained him of blood, jack ass, what do you think?\" \"YOU KILLED HIM I HATE YOU!!” \"First off, oh, I’m so upset, you hate me. Next, if you took the time to look, you\'d see that he is still quite alive, just not quite awake.\" Rosiel then grabs Katan and, probably suffocating him, and hugs him really hard. \"I thought that he killed you I\'m so glad your alive!\" He almost sobbed. They just roll their eyes at the sickeningly sweet sight. \"Right, hey, is this almost over, I have places to be and... appointments, you could say, to keep.\" Said Ira. \"One moment, we have to think of something to do to Haley.\" Ira moans, \"Can\'t you just let me kill her and get this damn chapter over with, only one tiny part had to do with a banana anyways!\" \"But if Haley didn\'t do the banana thing, then this part would not have happened.\" Maddie points out. \"Then I would not have to waste my time on this lame fanfic.\" \"You\'re my imaginary vampire and you\'ll do as I say.\"\"I\'ll do as I want. Our relationship is not like theirs.\" He says, making an off hand gesture to Katan and Rosiel. \"Well, I see the logic in that, but you can\'t leave just yet, we need to stick Haley to something.\" Ira sighs, picks up Haley, and casually throws her out the window. (A/N This is now a two story church) Her shirt is stuck on a protruding gutter.” Now that thats over, can I go now?\" Ira inquires. \"Fine you are dismissed.\" With that Ira promptly leaves. And everyone but Haley and Ira go back to sleep. The faint cries of \"...hellllo...\" Hello... I have to go to the bathroom.\" Is heard.
This entire chapter was completely written by Maddie. I, Haley, only really helped with the spelling. I was going to leave it, to be a bitch, but I realized no one would be able to understand it then. So I was nice and went over it. Ok then, ~ta~!
“...helllllllllllllllllllloooo... HELLO! Any body there, it\'s pulling my hair!!\" Finally the glue wears off, and Haley falls to the floor with a \'flop\', leaving a large chunk of hair in her wake. \"Well, I guess the glue finally wore off then, huh?\" Maddie says, a bit disappointed. \"Great. now she\'s going to try and grope me again, and Sir Rosiel is not here to stop the inevitable.\" (A/N I don\'t know where he went) Katan says. \"But first, I want revenge.\" Haley says, pulling out a banana. \"What the hell are you going to do with a banana? And isn\'t revenge something that I would do, you don’t seem like that sort of person, or whatever the hell you are.\" Maddie says. \"But Maddie\'s the one that that said to throw food at you, not me.\" \"But I\'ve always wanted to do this.\" she whined. With that she unpeeled the banana and smeared it all over his face, saying, \"Mmmm banana.\"^_^ (A/N I did that to my friend at lunch one day, thats where I got the idea) At that moment, Rosiel walks in and says, \"That wasn\'t a banana, was it?\" \"Why?\" \"HES ALLERGIC TO BANANAS!\" \"Since when am I allergic to bananas?\" Katan says before promptly passing out on the dirty floor of the church. FLUMP!! (A/N I don’t know what sort of reaction that is, but this is fiction, it\'ll work.Oh, and \"FlUMP\" was the sound of him falling) \"So how do we go about waking him up?\" Haley asked. \"Who said anything about waking him up?\" Maddie retorts. All three slowly look up at each other.
(insert battle for Katan here)
--- CAERFUL, NASTY PART---About an hour later, Katan wakes up in extreme discomfort, face down on Rosiel\'s mattress. \"Why is it that when ever something bad happens, it always gets worse for me?\" He says, wincing at an incredibly hard thrust from Rosiel. \"Oh, come now, it isn’t THAT bad, you know it.\" Rosiel says a bit breathlessly. \"Not in your opinion, and besides, your on top, not on the receiving end.\" \"Oh stop whining.\" Rosiel finishes, in both senses, and collapses on top of a sore Katan. He pulls out and lays down next to him, pulling Katan close and cradling him to his chest, nuzzling the top of Katan’s head. Noting that his hair feels like spun silk, and that he’s so soft and sweet. ---END---
Then, because this is our parody, the sweet, limeish tender moment was interrupted by soft \"awwws\" coming from that shadowy corners of the room. At that, Haley tackles the bed, jarring the other two slightly. Maddie saunters over to the bed. \"Next time, make it a little more kinky, with biting and blood drinking, and hand cuffs, oh, and lots of painful shouts, I like painful shouts, and...\" She is cut off by a nervous looking Katan, saying, \"Shut up before he gets any ideas! Its bad enough that he does it while I\'m incapacitated, but if he does all of that while I\'m awake, well that would just suck.\" Maddie just snickers. \"No, but you would.\" \"Will you two go away, we’re trying to have an intimate moment here, and you two are messing it up, a lot.\" Rosiel complained. \"Don’t worry, it wasn\'t working. I was just about to turn over, ignore you and go to sleep. Even if your asleep, sex wears you out.\" Katan muttered, doing exactly what he said he planned to do, only then realizing that Haley was right next to him, and ended up face to face with her. \"Hi BIRDYMAN. You two have really entertaining sex, did you know that?\" she said, clinging to him. \"See, when ever things get bad, it always gets worse for me. I\'m stuck between a horny fan girl and that male equivalent to one.\" Rosiel starts to try to shove Haley off HIS Katan, but being that his Katan is in the way, its a pretty hard task. (A/N pretty like Katan ^_^)
(insert struggle here)
Eventually, Haley and Katan both end up on the floor, and before Rosiel could drag him back on the bed so he couldn\'t get away or Haley got to him, she licked his cheek and said, \"You taste like yum.\" Maddie, then licks his cheek and said \"Yuck, you taste like semen and Haley spit.\" (A/N No, I don’t know what that tastes like) At that moment, Ira chooses to reveal him self by saying, \"Regardless of what his cheeks taste like, I bet his blood tastes good, angel blood always does.\" And with lightning fast speed, he runs up and sinks his teeth into his neck. After about three and a half minutes, not draining Katan completely, but barely conscience, afterwards, letting him drop to the bed. \"Hm, not bad, not bad at all...\" He murmured, satisfied. Rosiel, being a bit on the over protective side (A/N Like Haley’s ass hole dad...) Put both hands to the side of his face and said, \"What have you done to my Katan!\" \"Well, I drained him of blood, jack ass, what do you think?\" \"YOU KILLED HIM I HATE YOU!!” \"First off, oh, I’m so upset, you hate me. Next, if you took the time to look, you\'d see that he is still quite alive, just not quite awake.\" Rosiel then grabs Katan and, probably suffocating him, and hugs him really hard. \"I thought that he killed you I\'m so glad your alive!\" He almost sobbed. They just roll their eyes at the sickeningly sweet sight. \"Right, hey, is this almost over, I have places to be and... appointments, you could say, to keep.\" Said Ira. \"One moment, we have to think of something to do to Haley.\" Ira moans, \"Can\'t you just let me kill her and get this damn chapter over with, only one tiny part had to do with a banana anyways!\" \"But if Haley didn\'t do the banana thing, then this part would not have happened.\" Maddie points out. \"Then I would not have to waste my time on this lame fanfic.\" \"You\'re my imaginary vampire and you\'ll do as I say.\"\"I\'ll do as I want. Our relationship is not like theirs.\" He says, making an off hand gesture to Katan and Rosiel. \"Well, I see the logic in that, but you can\'t leave just yet, we need to stick Haley to something.\" Ira sighs, picks up Haley, and casually throws her out the window. (A/N This is now a two story church) Her shirt is stuck on a protruding gutter.” Now that thats over, can I go now?\" Ira inquires. \"Fine you are dismissed.\" With that Ira promptly leaves. And everyone but Haley and Ira go back to sleep. The faint cries of \"...hellllo...\" Hello... I have to go to the bathroom.\" Is heard.
This entire chapter was completely written by Maddie. I, Haley, only really helped with the spelling. I was going to leave it, to be a bitch, but I realized no one would be able to understand it then. So I was nice and went over it. Ok then, ~ta~!