Realities of Life

Disclaimer: Gravitation is not mine and I make no money from using the characters.

NC 17

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Realities of Life

Chapter 6
Lessons in Love


I’m not proud, I was wrong
And the truth is hard to take
I felt sure we had enough
But our love went overboard
Lifeboat lies lost at sea
I’ve been trying to reach your shore
Waves of doubt keep drowning me

All the dreams that we were building
We never fulfilled them
Could be better, should be better
For lessons in love


I stared at the drivel I had been writing for the two hours and wondered if I should seriously consider another line of work. The laptop screen taunted me with the inane tripe I had been responsible for creating. Even Shuichi could have written something better.

Shuichi. I looked at the clock. 8:47. Where the hell was that brat?

I stood up and, after retrieving a beer from the \'fridge, wandered out onto the balcony and into the cool night air.

Shuichi was still mad at me. It had been over two weeks since the incident at the NG party and he was still furious with me. Well, actually he was angry at the whole world.

Suddenly, he didn\'t believe anything I had told him about the last two years. He wouldn’t listen to any of the so-called “excuses” I gave him. He barely tolerated my presence. And forget trying to touch him. Not unless I wanted another black eye, anyway.

My stomach twisted in a bout of searing agony. I tried my best to ignore the attack, despite that they were happening more often of late.

Shuichi could certainly hold a grudge now. There was some good news, though. The past two days seemed to be a bit better. At least now he would look at me when I spoke to him.

I had decided that NG parties were absolutely off limits and would not be attended in the future. That is, if we had a future. I knew that Shuichi was still trying to decide whether or not he wanted to continue a relationship with me.

Again, the burning pain hit me, nearly doubling me over. Stupid ulcers.

After the worst of the pain had passed, I took a few moments to admire the night sky. As I did so, I heard the unmistakable sound of a high performance engine as it raced down the road, closing in on the apartment building. As it roared into the parking lot, I got a good look the black Mitsubishi under the streetlights before it disappeared around the corner and out of my line of sight. It was a high-performance rally car, just as I had suspected. Although I could no longer see it, I could still hear it, and the purr of the engine let me know that the car had been fine-tuned to razor sharpness. It was a thing of beauty.

I watched with interest as it blasted back out onto the street and melted into the night. Whoever was driving it knew what they were doing.

A few minutes later, I returned inside and considered a cigarette. I wanted to light up, but the gnawing pain in my stomach told me otherwise. I decided to pass on it for the time being. I sat back down at my computer and glared at it. The same crap was there on the screen, only now it seemed even worse. I sighed and began hitting the delete button.

I heard the door open and then close again. 9:12.

Finally.

The sound of his soft footfalls told me he was near. \"Hey brat,\" I growled at him, \"Where have you been?\"

He didn’t say anything, but he grabbed my chair and spun me around to face him. The look he had in his eyes was absolutely carnal.

That look told me how I could get him to forgive me. Did I want to do that?

I felt my cock twitch with interest. Hmm, maybe.

He snagged my shirt in his fist and pulled me to my feet. “Come on,” He growled, his voice husky with lust. He dragged me behind him as he marched down the hall.

“Brat…” I began but was cut off.

“No talking.” He barked as he threw open the bedroom door.

Once inside he turned to face me again, eyes blazing with need. “Strip.” He commanded.

Okay. I could go along with this, for a while anyway. I unbuttoned my shirt, let it slide off of me and dropped it to the floor. He was watching my every movement with a feral alertness.

I unzipped my pants and stepped out of them, my boxers quickly joined the growing pile of clothes. It was strange, but I found that his intense, lust-filled attention was really starting to turn me on.

“So now wh…”

“I said no talking.” He hissed at me, still devouring me with his eyes. “Get on the bed.”

Oh yeah, I was completely turned on. It must have been the past two weeks of abstinence catching up with me. I lay on the bed and watched him practically rip off his own clothes and grab the lubricant from the top of the dresser. He was pretty fired up. Had those two weeks gotten to him as well?

He slid onto the bed next to me and pulled me into a brutal, harsh kiss. My body sang with a sudden and almost violent reaction to the kiss. My cock— no, my whole body was aching for Shuichi. I moaned in appreciation.

His hands were hot as they trailed over me, touching and teasing, playing me like a musical instrument. He stopped the movement of one of his hands long enough to twist my left nipple with a savage force, making my body tense with the pain.

Moving his mouth to my neck, he nipped and licked his way slowly down to my chest, seeking out my erogenous zones, making me shake with desire.

His mouth replaced his fingers on my nipple. For a moment, his tongue swirled around the hardened nub in a gentle spiral. I began to enjoy the sensation only to have the soft lapping replaced by a cruel touch of teeth. I groaned, feeling sharp, prickling pain. It was nearly all I could take.

I reached out to slow his actions, but he batted my hands away and sat back, his eyes blazing in anger now, “No touching!” He commanded and I docilely placed my hands back on the bed.

He was staring at me again as he licked his lips and lightly touched my dripping, twitching erection. “You’re so hard, Eiri,” he cooed at me with a sly smile that made me squirm internally. “I almost think you want me to be mean to you. Maybe you want me to punish you. You have been bad, after all.”

Leaning over me he ran his tongue along the shell of my ear as he whispered, “Yeah, that is what you want, isn’t it, Eiri?”

Although I tried to, I couldn’t stay the low growl that escaped my throat.

“Don’t worry, Eiri,” he nuzzled my ear again. “I’ll be happy to give you what you want.”

He renewed his journey down my body, licking and biting with a slow, deliberate show of control. He was terrifying and unbelievably sexy as he stepped into the lead position in our lovemaking.

Stopping at my navel, he dipped his tongue in and teased me with movements that I longed for him to do to other parts of my anatomy. I whined with need as he continued to ignore my wants and wishes, continuing to move down my body at an excruciatingly slow pace.

Finally, he moved his head so that his mouth hovered over my weeping, rock-hard cock. I writhed and bucked with desire on the bed as he stared hard into my eyes, his expression totally unreadable.

After what seemed to be an eternity, he lowered his head and slowly licked the very tip of my penis, tasting the pre-cum that glistened there. He moved his tongue down my hardened shaft and nuzzled my aching testicles. Hands pushed insistently at my thighs, spreading them further apart as his tongue dipped lower still, lapping at that ultra-sensitive strip of flesh.

I felt a finger gently touched my anus and I realized that he had somehow managed to open the lube and coat his fingers. He swirled his finger around the highly sensitive area as his mouth gently enclosed and suckled my testicles.

I was already so excited, I was afraid of embarrassing myself by coming too soon. My hands twisted in the sheets as I concentrated on maintaining some control.

He moved his head again and lapped at my neglected cock, finally slipping his mouth over the tip and down my length, engulfing me with the wet warmth. I could feel myself touch the back of his throat and he shifted the angle of his descent. I arched against his mouth and gave a loud moan as he swallowed me whole.

He nearly bruised me with the pressure he applied from his lips as he began slowly sliding up and down my raging hard-on. It was so good, and I was so distracted, that I barely noticed as he slid his index finger into me. He continued the hard suction on my cock, driving me ever closer to a quick orgasm.

Too quick. I wanted to stop him, so I reached out again, but he slapped my hands away.

His head was moving faster now, tongue pressing against my erection with an unbelievably hard caress.

Slipping a second finger into me caused me to involuntarily rock my hips. I felt him searching for the spot that would totally undo me and realized that I would be the first to orgasm tonight. Thus resigned, I tried to let myself relax and enjoy the sensation. When he located my prostate and massaged it gently, I squirmed and writhed in reaction, as the starbursts begin cascading across my vision.

“Shuichi…” I panted, and was immediately punished, as a third finger was jammed into me.

That did it. I cried out as I spilled into Shuichi’s waiting and ready mouth. He continued, swallowing me and stroking me with his tongue, until I was bucking with the sensory overload to my now hypersensitive and spent cock.

He sat back, licking his lips and wiping at his chin to catch the cum that had escaped his mouth with his free hand. He licked his sticky fingers clean as he watched me with predatory lust.

He was unbelievably hot.

Pulling his fingers from me, he rasped, “Roll over.”

He was also kind of scary.

I wasn’t sure if I was ready for this. After all, the only other time we had done this was the night I had been handcuffed and high on ecstasy.

His eyes narrowed, “Roll over, Eiri. Now!”

I rolled onto my stomach.

“No. On you knees,” he demanded.

Oh, fuck. “Shuichi…”

He smacked my naked ass in warning. He actually spanked me! I wasn’t sure how I felt about that…

“I said: On. Your. Knees.” He smacked me again with every syllable. And I found that my cock, much to my surprise and humiliation, was reacting favorably to the situation.

I got on my knees. How embarrassing, and how... twisted! I was actually turned on by this?!

And the worst part of it was that Shuichi knew it, too. He touched my renewed erection as he said, “Tsk, Eiri. It looks as if you want me to punish you some more. You love this, don’t you?” He slapped me again and though I tried not to, but I moaned all the same.

“Yeah,” he whispered, “I guess you do.”

I felt him slide off the bed, “Do not move, Eiri.”

So I didn’t move. I lay there with my head on the pillow, my ass in the air. It was so wrong.

My lover was at the foot of the bed and I was totally surprised when I felt the sting of leather across my naked butt.

I should have been furious. I should have stopped everything long before *my* belt made an appearance. Instead, I found that I was writhing and panting, craving the next strike of leather on my already sensitive skin. What the hell was wrong with me?

“You’re such a masochist, Eiri. I wonder how many people, other than me, know that.” He taunted me.

I’m not sure how many times he struck me, but my skin was burning hot when he dropped the belt, grabbed my hips, and thrust into me with a savage vengeance. Clearly, he was as turned on as I was. I could tell he was having trouble keeping still as he tried to give me time to adjust to the intrusion. I thought I might actually pass out from the pain and pleasure that coursed through me.

It was so raw and nasty, so humiliating, I found that I could not stop moaning.

Slowly he began to move, pulling almost completely out of me before sliding back in. He maneuvered my hips until he found the angle that would give me the most pleasure, making my moans louder yet.

He reached around and began stroking my erection in time with his thrusts and I came almost immediately, howling with my release.

He waited until my screaming subsided, then gripped my hips and pounded into me, lasting only seconds longer than myself. He groaned as he spilled himself inside of me, and collapsed over me. A moment later, he rolled off of me and onto his back. The two of us lay there, exhausted and panting.

I tried to process what had just happened. He’d been pretty rough with me, but I figured it was good therapy for him to get all that anger out. A little embarrassing for me, maybe, but also… well, best not to dwell on some things.

As I reached for my cigarettes, I had to ask, “So, are you done being in a snit with me, now?”

He closed his eyes and sighed deeply.

I took that to be a yes. After all, what else could he want from me?

After a few minutes of silence he finally spoke, “Eiri?”

“Hm?” I grunted at him, taking a deep drag of my nearly done smoke.

“Do you think we have a fucked up relationship?”

“Compared to who?” I put my cigarette out and wondered what direction he was headed, “Nakano and that nut bar singer? My sister and Tohma?”

He opened his eyes and smiled brightly at me, “You have an excellent point, Eiri.”

Leaning over, he gave me a loving kiss, letting me know everything was okay again. When he broke the kiss he looked me in the eyes, “I love you, Eiri.”

Taking my hand he stood, “Come on.”

I raised an eyebrow at him.

He grinned again, “Shower. I suspect you’ll be wanting some sort of revenge, now.”

“You got that right,” I stood. My ass was pretty sore, in more ways than one. As I followed him down the hall I said, “Look, brat, I don’t want you getting any ideas that you get to do this all the time. Or ever again, for that matter.”

“Uh-huh. I know, Eiri,” he said. “I promise I’ll make it up to you.” He paused long enough to turn on the shower. “After I let you pound me into submission in the shower, I’ll make you something to eat. You’re looking pretty scrawny.”

“That’s a start,” I muttered.

He stepped into the shower and I watched the water cascade over his perfect body, giving my cock renewed life once again. I stepped into the shower with him and pulled him close.

“Eiri?” he said softly.

“Hmm?” I answered as I nuzzled his neck.

“Could you look me in the eyes when you make love to me?”

Now that was a strange request. I looked at him skeptically, “You can’t complain about the cold tiles on your back.”

He touched my face gently, “I won’t. As long as I can see your eyes.”

I wasn’t sure what that was about, but I was happy my boy was back.


It had been pouring rain for a couple of days and the streets had built up the miniature lakes that came with the rainy season and clogged street drains. Shuichi was leaving work early the following Friday and took the opportunity of blaming the rain to call and beg for a ride home.

I had my worries and suspicions as to what was happening with him at the studio, especially with Inoue around, so I agreed without putting up much of a fight.

I drove into the parking lot and pulled into one of the spots marked for visitors. I hoped the brat didn\'t keep me waiting long today.

Stepping out of my car, I moved towards the entrance. That\'s when I saw it. A black Mitsubishi. Even though I had a bad feeling about it, my curiosity got the better of me and I changed direction to get a closer look. It was loaded with extras and after-market modifications. I bet it could really fly.

It had to be the same car I saw a few nights ago at the apartment building. A little too much of a coincidence, I’d say.

\"Beautiful, isn\'t she?\" a smooth voice said behind me.

I turned. Ah, Inoue, as I had suspected. How typical.

I nodded, \"Yes, very nice.\"

\"She has a modified suspension, so she\'s silky through the corners.\" He ginned at me, \"Not as sophisticated as your Mercedes, mind you, but she gets me around.\"

I reached for my cigarettes.

\"Shuichi likes her, too.\"

\"Does he?\" I asked with boredom in my voice.

\"Yes, he even drives her sometimes.\"

\"Then you are a fool.\" I stated.

He laughed, \"Maybe. But I like to make him happy.\" He leaned up against his car. \"Was he, how shall I put this… happy to see you the other night?\"

My jaw clenched. This was exactly what I had been worried about. Shuichi had been so fired up when he came in that night. Had it been because of Inoue?

He smiled again, \"You\'re so uptight about this whole thing. So what if he\'s attracted to both of us? It\'s not as if that means he doesn\'t love you. In fact, it might mean he’ll have even more passion for you. Like the other night.”

He pulled out his own cigarettes and lit one, keeping eye contact with me. He really was unnerving to speak to. It was as if I was the only person in the world and had one hundred percent of his attention. Strange.

“You don’t talk much, do you?”

My glare was totally ineffective on him and he smiled back at me. He really was a charismatic bastard.

“Well, how about I tell you what I told him?” He took a drag but his eyes still bore into me. “I’m okay with sharing him. He, however, seemed to think you wouldn’t be into it.”

Sharing? Was this guy insane?

Is that what I’d have to do to keep Shuichi?

“Hmm. By your reaction, looks like he knows you pretty well.” He smiled again, but it wasn’t malicious, it seemed to be more curious. “Look, maybe you should think about it before you freak out, okay?”

He continued to match my stare with that soft smile.

“He really loves you, you know. In spite of everything, he loves you. Maybe too much.”

“Kyo!” Shuichi hissed, “What the fuck do you think you’re you doing?”

He grinned at Shuichi, “Just clearing the air a bit.”

Shuichi looked like a cornered animal as he stood an equal amount of steps away from both of us, “You have no right…”

“Oh, I think I do. After all, we’re all three caught up in this, like it or not.”

I turned and moved towards my car. I’d had enough. Groveling, begging, humiliating myself – I’d be damned if I’d take anymore!

“Eiri,” I heard Shuichi’s footsteps as he caught up with me. He grabbed my arm and I twisted free, still aiming for the car.

“Eiri, wait!” He cried, “Stop. Don’t leave me like this. We need to talk about this.”

“No we don’t,” I said as I opened the door to my car and slid in, the dam of anger finally bursting. “We don’t need to talk. Ever.”

“Eiri!” He screamed, “Don’t leave me again!”

I jammed the key in the ignition and threw the car into first gear as he moved in front of the car, arms held wide, tears coursing down his cheeks, still screaming at me to stop.

He would have let me run him over. I know that now. And I would have done it. I know that, also.

It was Inoue that saved both of us, pulling Shuichi out of the homicidal path of my car.


Two and a half hours later, I was in my favorite bar, still amazingly sober, when Tohma showed up. Now, why was I not surprised?

“Hello, Eiri,” he sat down at the table with me.

I lit a cigarette.

Tohma nodded at the bartender and, moments later, a scotch appeared in front of both of us.

He took a sip and met my icy glare, “Did you know, Eiri, that the last time you left Shuichi, we almost had to institutionalize him?”

I jolted at the news.

He nodded, realizing he had my attention. “He almost starved himself to death. K and Nakano had to forcibly drag him from your empty apartment. He wouldn’t eat, he wouldn’t sing, and he barely spoke. He told Nakano that when you left him, you took his music with you. He also told Nakano that without you and without music, he didn’t see any reason to go on.”

“Hiroshi-kun kept at him, kept his head above water, but just barely. Then his restaurant friend, Takahashi Mirai, lent a hand and the two of them took turns keeping him going, keeping him alive.”

I took a deep drink. I had heard bits of this story, but not the cold, hard truth of the matter. I swallowed the growing lump in my throat.

“Kyosuke was the one that pulled Shuichi out of his death spiral. He was the one that brought back Shuichi’s ability to sing and laugh again. He literally saved Shuichi, Eiri.”

He finished his drink and stood, “I thought it might be important for you to know why Shuichi would feel so much for Kyosuke.”

And, after dropping that little bomb on me, he left.

I left the bar not long after Tohma. Maybe I had overreacted a bit with Shuichi. A bit? I had tried to run him down with my car, for fuck’s sake.

Suddenly, there was a thumping from the car and the steering became rough. I realized I had a flat tire. Wonderful.

I parked it in the breakdown lane and got out. It was the right rear tire. I got out the jack and the spare. As changed the tire, I was splashed repeatedly with cold, dirty rainwater by passing motorists. Could this day get any better?

When I finally, thankfully, turned the corner for the apartment building, I hit the mother of all mud puddles and absolutely drenched a young woman who happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time.

I parked and got out to apologize. She was quite lovely and familiar. I asked her, “Do I know you?”

She smiled as she shook the puddle water off of her, “Yes, you do. I’m Suzuki Sai, we met at the NG party a few weeks ago.”

Oh, yeah. Her. “What do you want?” I snapped.

She laughed, “I’m Mizuki’s temporary replacement. I’m here to get your latest chapters.”

Oh. “Come on,” I growled as I headed for the apartment.

Once inside, I gave her a couple of towels and the chapters.

She held the slim stack of paper and looked at the couch, “Do you think I might be able to dry my clothes while I check these out?”

I thought about it. I was the one that drenched her, after all. And she was legitimately here on business. I shrugged and got her a robe.

“You dry your clothes and check out the chapters, and then get out. I’ll be taking a shower.” I really wanted to remove the road grime and chill from my body as quickly as possible.

“Mizuki warned me of your charm,” she smiled again as I turned my back on her.

When I came back out forty-five minutes later, she was still there, just pulling her clothes out of the dryer.

“Hi,” she smiled.

“Why are you still here?”

She laughed, “I’ll be leaving in a few minutes. Oh, by the way, you had a visitor.”

I stared at her.

“He left this,” She placed a key in my hand. “And said to tell you; “You’re right. We don’t need to talk again.” He also said something about Yokohama. Does that make sense?”

“Yokohama?” I looked at her. She was wearing my robe, in my house. She had even taken the liberty to pour herself a cup of coffee in that horrible mug that Shuichi adored.

“What did you say to him?” I snarled.

“Nothing,” she said cautiously. “He asked where you were and I told him.”

The shower. The one thing I always did after sex. Take a shower.

I looked at the situation from Shuichi’s point-of-view. I was fucked. Even if I hadn’t tried to run him over earlier in the day.

I glared at her, “Get out. Now.”

“But I’m not dressed…”

“Take them with you, then. Get out, or I’ll throw you out.”

“All right!” She gathered everything together and headed for the door. “You really are a prick, you know that?”

“Yes, I do,” I said as I slammed the door.

I sprinted for the phone, barely able to control my shaking in order to dial the number I needed to.

“Hello, Eiri,” The smooth voice said at the other end.

“Tohma.” I swallowed hard, “I think I may have a problem.”

“Yes, Eiri,” he said back to me, obvious concern in his voice. “I believe you are correct. Please come to the studio as soon as you can.”

I hung up and ran for the door.


TBC

Lyrics for Lessons in Love by Level 42