Something In-Between

Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation nor do I make any money from using the characters.

NC-17

If you have time, please review. Of course, I live for them.


Note: Sorry for the delay. Bad, bad, bad corrupt chapter! (And not corrupt in the good, fun way.)

Kri and Ashcat fixed this chapter at one point, and then the silly thing went rogue, so any mistakes we can blame on my computer – ha!!


Something In-Between

Chapter 6
Today


Today is the greatest
Day I have ever known
Can’t wait for tomorrow
I might not have that long
I’ll tear my heart out
Before I get out

Pink ribbon scars
That never forget
I’ve tried so hard
To cleanse these regrets
My angel wings
Were bruised and restrained
My belly stings

Today is the greatest day
That I have ever known

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++


“Hiro?” I called softly to my best friend as he sat in the dark looking out over the city and smoking a cigarette.

“Oh, hi, Shu,” he smiled at me. “You’re not here to yell at me some more, are you?”

I shook my head and sighed, “No, I am still kind of mad at the both of you for setting me up for that picture. But I do know that in your own bizarre way, you were trying to help.”

“I am sorry for upsetting you,” he said gently.

I shrugged, as I moved into the room and sat next to him on the couch. I’d worry about the picture later. Right now, something strange was going on with Hiro and I intended to find out what it was.

He hadn’t been sleeping. As far as I could tell, since that kiss in the alleyway between Kyo and me, no one had been sleeping. I had my own reasons, and my own demons that kept me from sleeping. But what were their reasons?

It had been three nights now. Three nights of the three of us prowling around the house, our tempers fraying and flaring like wild dogs disputing their territory. Kyo would disappear for a few hours each night, out doing who knows what, most likely drinking at his favorite local pub.

Hiro and Kyo. Neither of them sleeping or eating, both of them irritable beyond belief it was as if… as if…

I started laughing. I really was slow sometimes.

“What do you find so amusing?” Hiro snapped at me.

Through my laughter I managed to say, “Hiro, why are you holding back?”

“What are you talking about?”

“I suspected it was Kyo, but for fuck’s sake, Hiro, how long are you going to brood about this?” I taunted.

Snarling at me he said, “I am not brooding.”

“Oh, really? Then what are you doing?” I challenged.

He sighed, “It’s not that simple.”

I leaned back on the couch next to him, “So, what’s making it complicated? Do you still have feelings for Ryu?”

“Not really. Not in the “boyfriend” context anyway,” he answered with a shake of his head. “Ryu and I were never meant to be anyway. Besides, Ryu is the one that sent me here.”

“Ryu did that?” well, that was newsworthy. “Why?”

“Because he figured out how I was feeling about Kyosuke. He thought that if he sent me here…”

“Really? Wow,” that freaky Ryu never did cease to amaze me. He was like one of those big grandfather clocks, all complicated with so many gears and cogs, seemingly chaotic but somehow working together to display the correct time.

“So if it’s not Ryu that holding you back from pursuing Kyo, then what is it? It can’t be that you are worried that Kyo will reject you, because he is clearly giving you the green light all the way,” I chuckled.

He remained silent.

“Hiro?” I prodded him, “Come on, what’s the deal?”

“Gods, Shu, I don’t know what to do!” He said with obvious frustration, leaning forward and crushing out his cigarette with agitation. “Kyosuke is so dynamic and so charismatic, I’m afraid his passion will consume me. You know me, Shu, I’ve never been one that required fireworks in a relationship, not like you. Fireworks are kind of, I don’t know, frightening for me.”

“Hey! I think you just insulted me!” I giggled at him.

“But, its true, Shu,” I studied his furrowed brow. He was definitely confused all right. “Your relationship with Yuki-san is very passionate. You both love that, so it works. I’m not sure I can handle that level of intensity. Being with Kyosuke is like … being with a shooting star.”

“A shooting star? Wow,” I whistled. “You’ve got it bad.”

He groaned and let his head fall back onto the couch, “I know, I know. I think I’m in over my head, Shu. I’m so distracted; Kyosuke is all I can think about. What can I do about it?”

I laughed again, “Look, Hiro, I know what you’re saying and I know it can be scary, but believe me, when you feel as strongly as you do, there’s no way out of it. Basically, you’re totally fucked. You might as well give in and, well… get fucked.”

He shook his head in misery, “I can’t. I told him that we needed to wait a while.”

“Why would you do that?” I asked with curiosity.

“Because,” he sighed, “my feelings for him are out of control.”

“Do you want to wait?” I knew the answer already, it was so obvious, but he needed to say it out loud.

After a pause he looked over at me with a smile of surrender, “No. Not at all.”

“Well, then,” I grinned at him, “there’s only one thing you can do.”

“What?” He said suspiciously.

“Jump on him,” I laughed. “It always works for me.”

“Will you go to sleep and leave me alone?” he was back to snarling at me.

I was still laughing as I wandered back down the hall. I passed Kyosuke but he barely even registered my presence, making my laughter begin anew.


I lay down and found that my eyes closed quickly. Finally, I felt that I would be able to sleep.

It felt like only moments later that my eyes snapped back open in response to the sound of a tortured, keening cry. I knew from personal experience what it took for Hiro make that particular noise. If I had to guess, I would have to say that Hiro took my advice after all. And it sounded as if he and Kyo were getting to know one another rather intimately at the moment.

Pulling my pillow around my ears, I rolled onto my side and tried to block out the loud sounds of lovemaking.

I was so lonely.

Fucking Eiri.

I heard Kyo’s lust-filled groan and that was all I could take. I got up and left my bedroom, moving as far from Kyo’s room as I could get. I took my laptop with me.

Ending up in the kitchen, I briefly stared in interest at the pack of cigarettes on the counter but decided that smoking wasn’t the best plan of action for me. Instead, I fired up the laptop and made some tea.

It was time I quit dancing around with Eiri and asked the question I really wanted to know the answer to. Besides, I was afraid that my window of opportunity to ask the question was narrowing. That picture of Kyo and me in the alley was still floating around out there and when that was published, and I had no doubt that it would be, I was sure that Eiri would be as good as gone from my life.

Somehow, in spite of his email reassuring me that he would do what he could to stop the publication of the picture, I was certain that Tohma wouldn’t stop it. I knew him too well. I was stupid to have bared my throat to him like that in the first place. Right now, I had visions of NG’s Label Boss sitting in that crazy office of his, jacking off to a recording of Kyo and I having sex in his bedroom. I shuddered involuntarily at the thought.

Tohma was way too slippery to trust. What had I been thinking when I asked for his help?

I heard Hiro’s impassioned cry again and tried to close my mind to the new images that assaulted me. Kyo and Hiro, I bet they were hot together. And, having first hand knowledge of what each one was capable of didn’t help.

The two of them together would rate 11 out of 10 on the kink meter. You’d never guess that about Hiro, would you? Mr. Mild-mannered, genius guitar player was about as kinky as you could get. And Kyo… for fuck’s sake, Kyo was a ravenous beast, hot for any idea.

I shivered with what my imagination cooked up for me. Gods, I am horny! Horny and lonely, a very dangerous combination. Sometimes, I did some really stupid shit when I got like this. For example, I considered, just for a moment, joining Kyo and Hiro.

I shook my head. Now that was a truly bad idea.

If I were in Tokyo I would head to Kai’s. It was probably fortunate that I was in London. I could use some help staying on the straight and narrow, so to speak. Although, from what I’d managed to pick up from the locals and Miki, I hear Amsterdam might hold some promising… diversions. And it’s really not that far away.

No. I shook my head again. No.

Well then, maybe just a peak at Hiro and Kyo wouldn’t hurt. I got up and walked about halfway down the hall before I managed to get a grip on my senses and force myself back into the kitchen.

Where was Eiri when I really needed him? I really, really needed Eiri.

I sighed and tried to clear my thoughts of sex. When Kyo and Hiro finished, maybe I would indulge in my own personal fantasy. Of course, that fantasy would invariably become Eiri.

Fucking Eiri.

I sighed again in frustration and decided that, in the meantime, I would email my question. This might be the last email I would send to Eiri.


Why did you cheat on me in Yokohama?


I doubted if he would answer me. He hadn’t even said anything yet about the chippie that I had caught him with before I trashed his car. Not one word. Not even the lie, “I didn’t do anything wrong.” He never thinks he does anything wrong. The bastard. And if maybe, on occasion, there was a tiny hint of wrongdoing, his response would be to run away.

He was such a complete fuck. Why couldn’t I get his sorry ass out of my head?

I needed to find a Dojo and start training again. That would help center me and get me back on track. This circular path that I was on now would only lead me to self-destruction. I thought about my last conversation with Mirai and the fact that I needed to be comfortable with myself and being alone.

I needed to learn to love myself.

After what had happened over the last two years, was that even a possibility for me? After what I had done to Hiro, Kyo and Ryuichi? And what I had done to Eiri.

Eiri. Part of me wanted to see him so bad I could scream. Part of me was terrified of seeing him. What if he looked at me with that bored, detached stare and dismissed me as if I were less than insignificant? He was good at that kind of stuff, reducing me to nothing with a mere glance, tearing what little self-esteem I had left to shreds. I wasn’t sure my ego could take his rejection right now. And what if he turned into that Eiri that had held me down and…

I was too weak and afraid. I couldn’t face him yet.

My stomach twisted with sudden, burning pain and I did my best to ignore it.

More moans assaulted my ears and I decided that I’d had enough. I stood up again and headed for the small, well-lit garden at the back of the flat. There was enough room outside for me to at least work through some forms and I would be away from all the moaning cries of passionate lovemaking.

When I got outside, I was surprised to find that it was not raining, but the air was heavy with the promise of a coming deluge. I was somewhat reassured to find that I felt better by simply stepping outside.

I moved through some stances in order to warm up and focus. I centered on my breathing and blocked the rest of the world out for the moment. I didn’t think about Eiri or Hiro or Kyo or even singing, I thought about breathing and all the reactions of my body. My muscles and ligaments, even my skin tingled with a heightened awareness as I turn inward and contemplated each movement.

It was a wonderful feeling, being this in tune with myself, a feeling that I wished to carry with me always.

When I finished, I realized that I had an audience. I looked towards the neighbor’s yard and found Kyo’s neighbor was watching me with interest.

“Hello, Nakamura-san,” I smiled and waved.

Something amazing happened, then. He waved back. The quiet man had never acknowledged my presence before. Nor anyone else’s as far as I could tell.

I was suddenly curious about Nakamura-san. I moved closer to him, “Do you practice martial arts, Nakamura-san?”

“Yes. Several different forms,” he rumbled in response. He was speaking Japanese to me, thank the gods!

“Maybe we could practice together?” I said with hope. I could use someone else to talk to if Kyo and Hiro were going to be wrapped up in each other.

“Perhaps,” was his deep voiced reply.

“I don’t mean to be nosy, Nakamura-san, but why are you outside at three in the morning?” I hoped I was not being too rude.

“Why are you?” was his monotone answer and his eyes said much more, but I was not sure what.

“Ah, um, well, I couldn’t sleep,” was my feeble answer. It was true, though.

“Same,” he replied.

We both heard as his roommate from inside the flat called out to him. Nakamura-san gave me a slight bow and re-entered his house.

Hmm. I wondered if they were lovers.

I went back inside my own temporary home and was greeted with wonderful, soothing silence. Good. I hoped Kyo and Hiro had tired themselves out so that they wouldn’t wake me up again.

I was so bitching at them in the morning.



A few days later I emerged from a shower to find an unconscious Ryuichi in the house. I asked about his arrival but both Kyo and Hiro ignored me and my question.

Kyo and Hiro were rather tense.

And then I remembered; Ryu is Hiro’s ex-boyfriend. Was Kyo jealous? No, Kyo wasn’t the jealous type. I found it more plausible that Kyo would invite Ryu to join them.

I watched them. Maybe it was Hiro that was tense about Ryu being here.

I watched them some more. Maybe it was something other than Ryu?

There was a very strange dynamic taking place and I couldn’t seem to put my finger on it.

When Ryu came to, he wouldn’t tell me what happened either. He reverted to Ryu-chan and wanted to color with me. I was okay with that.

Sometimes it was good for me to pretend that I was still that goofy, pink-haired fluff-ball that was easily amused by coloring or video games. If I could turn back the clock, and do it all over, would I have slept with all my friends and found alcohol and drugs of more interest than drawing?

Probably. As Miki says, love makes us do some crazy shit sometimes.

“Shu-chan?”

I looked up and into Kumagoro’s pink face.

“I’m sorry, Kuma-chan, what did you say?” I could still talk to the stuffed animal, that was a promising sign that I had not become completely jaded. Not yet, anyway.

“I said, maybe you should change your hair,” Kuma repeated.

“To what?” I touched the spiky, wild mess. It has grown out quite a bit and my dark roots are showing. “I’m not sure I’m ready to give up the blond.”

Ryu tipped Kuma-chan to side and leaned close to me, “Maybe you should go back to pink. It suits you, Shu-chan.”

Hmm. A new ‘do might be good for me.

“Okay, Ryu, Kuma-chan. I’ll ask Kyo where to go and then I’ll make an appointment. Maybe get Miki-san to go with me.” I no longer color my own hair. It is much easier to have someone else do it for me, and the results were usually a whole lot better.

“Yay!” Ryu jumped up and pulled me to my feet and we danced around for a few minutes before I actually broke down and turned on some music. Then we danced together like maniacs for a couple of hours. It was good. I felt good.

There was an interesting story about Ryu and me. Everyone thought we had some torrid love affair, but it wasn’t quite like that. Ryuichi was funny about sex; and not in the good way.

He wouldn’t do it with me. It was weird, and I was sure that he had done it before, but with me, he would never go all the way. We played around a bit, oral sex and hand jobs were okay with him, but full on sex was not allowed.

In addition to all his other freakiness, I was pretty sure he had some control issues. And since I wouldn’t allow penetration, he got … peevish. During our brief, strange “affair” I received the distinct impression that Ryu was kinky on a whole different level from the rest of us. There is something very odd lurking just below the surface of Ryuichi that I would never see, and I was quite content with that knowledge. Truth be told, I had strong suspicion that I would not want to experience that bizarre dimension of Sakuma Ryuichi.

Gods help whoever he embraced wholeheartedly.

I was sure Hiro hadn’t managed to stumble onto the true being that was Ryuichi either. Otherwise, I was certain that Ryu wouldn’t have let Hiro go so easily. At some point, I planned on comparing notes with Hiro, but right now, that would require stepping into an area filled with potential landmines, and I wasn’t sure either one of us was up for that.

Not yet anyway.


“Ugh,” I said with a laugh, “not you!”

“It’s good to see you, too, Shuichi,” Suguru growled at me, still clutching his suitcase.

Although we had the tendency to fight like cats and dogs, I realized that, at this point in our lives it is simply out of habit, not because we had any bad feelings for one another. I found that I was secretly happy to see him, although I was certain that feeling would fade rapidly. Especially once his infernal nitpicking began.

“K will be here in a couple of days as well,” Suguru informed me as he raised an eyebrow at me. “Your hair is interesting.”

That’s right, he hadn’t seen me since I whacked it all off in mourning of my break-up with Eiri. It was still blond and spiky, but a tad longer and peppered with pink and purple ends.

I suppose “interesting” was meant as an inoffensive word, but I still jumped on him over it, “What do you mean by “interesting”? Is that supposed to be an insult?”

“It’s doesn’t “mean” anything,” he snapped back. Without missing a beat he continued as he said, “That last song you recorded was dynamite by the way. Very emotional, the fans are going to love it. I think that should be the first single released.”

“Oh, yeah, I agree that it should be the first single,” Hiro added. “Sorry, I meant to tell you that earlier. Well done, Shu.”

“Uh, thanks,” I mumbled as I relive the memory of the song and of recording it. Of Tohma’s gentle words and the absolute weirdness of him praising me over the song. Suguru’s praising of the tune is almost as strange. Maybe I should listen to the song myself.

“Is it true that Tohma helped you record it?” Suguru asked with a hint of jealousy.

“Yeah,” I nodded and sighed, I hated admitting that.

“You can tell that you were really feeling the music,” Suguru continued.

I had been feeling it then. My heartbreak song. Inspired by Kyo and sung for Eiri.

Fucking Eiri.




The next day, I realized that I hadn’t received any email from Eiri for a couple of days. I was sending him my usual blurbs about life in London when Kyo stepped into the kitchen.

“Hey, Shu,” he smiled at me.

Hiro and K are right behind him. Something was up.

“Hey, Kyo,” I said suspiciously, “what’s going on?”

He cleared his throat and smiled wider, “You and me made the cover.”

“What?” I said, as I felt the cold lump of anxiousness in the pit of my stomach.

Placing a magazine in front of me, he grinned, “See, we’re on the cover.”

Sure enough, that was me all right. My back against the brick wall, my hand in Kyo’s hair, Kyo pressed up against me and between my legs. It is clear in the picture that we have just been interrupted.

I was horrified. Fucking Tohma hadn’t stopped it. Of course, I knew he wouldn’t, that bastard!

And then that blinding anger surged up from within in me, like the swelling of a wave I could feel it start in my chest and it swept through my body to every synapse. I began to shake as my vision turned scarlet and I jumped to my feet and growled something incomprehensible. Like a cornered, wild animal, I lunged at Kyo, knocking over the table and my chair in my violent outburst of rage, my right fist aiming for his face.

He, however, had anticipated my reaction. He stepped closer to me, grabbing me at my wrist and shoulder, using my own momentum to turn me as he wrenched my arm up behind my back and forced me to the floor. The pain was excruciating and tears formed in my eyes immediately. I found myself on the floor, my arm still twisted tightly against my shoulder blades. Kyo’s knee was pressed against my back while his other hand pinned my wrist to the ground. He had quickly rendered me completely immobile. I had no idea he could move so fast.

“Oh, no you don’t. Not this time, Shu,” Kyo said calmly.

“You fuck!” I screamed at him as I struggled feebly, even though every move I made brought a new wave of pain, “Let me go!”

“Why? So you can punch me again?” he chuckled softly but there is a slight hint of something else in his laugh, something bordering on cruel. “No, I don’t think so. I’ve indulged you long enough and you’ve already got one on me, Shu, but not again.”

“Kyosuke, take it easy, don’t …” Hiro said soothingly, a gentle warning.

As I continued my futile movements to break free of his hold, I am suddenly reminded of the conversation I’d had with Kai about Kyo. Kai, the man who walked in the shadows, who had questionable connections with questionable people. Kai, the man that ran a house that was clearly outside of the law with impunity. Kai had said something about Kyo being dangerous and about Kyo and Kai coming from the same background. “Kyo is not a man to cross,” is what Kai had warned. It was a little late to be wondering, I supposed, but what exactly was Kyo?

I stopped my struggling for a moment, my breathing ragged and my adrenaline soaring. It had been a while since I had felt this powerless, since… Fear suddenly grasped me and I took the only option I had left, I turned inward.

Kyo took my sudden cease in movement as surrender and he leaned in close to my ear, “Okay, Shu, here’s the deal…”

That was as far as he got before I threw back my head in a last ditch effort to free myself. I felt the crown of my head collide solidly with teeth and his hold on me lessened for an instant. But only an instant, it was not enough time for me to wriggle free.

“Oww!” Kyo shouted as he wrenched harder on my arm. He moved his other hand from my wrist and used it to slam my head to the floor, “Why, you sneaky little wildcat.”

K chuckled nearby, “I told you to watch out for him, he’s tricky.”

“Kyosuke,” Hiro said softly, “that’s enough. Let him go.”

After a moment, Kyo once again leaned close to my ear and spoke softly, as if I were a child. “I will let you go now, but you have to agree, no more hitting or trying to hit, any of us. If you do, I can and I will hit you back and I guarantee, it will hurt. A lot. Now, you need to behave yourself, do you agree?”

I was totally helpless and humiliated, there was nothing else I could do but grit my teeth and say “Yes.”

“See,” he said as he released me and gently helped me to my feet as he wiped the blood from his mouth, “that wasn’t so hard.”

Kyo’s words had stung me, embarrassed me, and hurt me far worse than any physical pain he had inflicted upon me. I was stunned and speechless by what he had said to me and how he had said it. Kyo was no longer my ally, no longer… mine. It was as if someone had tugged loose a string in my life and my world started to unravel in front of me. Again.

“Shu?” It was Hiro’s concern that brings me around. I blinked my eyes at him. “Are you okay?”

I nodded in silence as I gathered up the laptop from the floor. I hoped that it was not broken, but I supposed it didn’t matter any more. Now I knew why I hadn’t heard from Eiri. And I knew that the tenuous truce we had was over. I would be very surprised if he was not gone completely from my life. Again.

“Shuichi,” K said from across the room, “we will begin practicing in three days. Be ready, okay?”

Nodding again, I left the room.

I didn’t come out of my room or speak for two days. Hiro left me food which I ignored. Kyo attempted to bridge the gap between us, but I wouldn’t speak to him. Ryu hovered around me and wanted to know if I would be shiny again soon. I realized that there were some definite positives to my relationship with Suguru as he ignored me completely.

I seemed to spend an unusual amount of time throwing up, even though I hadn’t eaten anything.

Briefly, I considered calling Eiri, to try and talk to him about the picture. But historically, phone conversations between Eiri and me were barely civil, even in the best of times. Now… I feared it would only compound the situation by escalating us into an argument that neither one of us would back down from. Email was better for us. That was, if he would even acknowledge me.

My only hope rested with my laptop. It was only a thread, but a drowning man will grasp at a thread nonetheless.

Eiri. Part of me hoped he was gone for good from my life, and part of me was dying with the same thought.

I sent two, three, and then nine emails explaining the situation and how I am not to blame. Then I told Eiri to fuck off.

I spent the next few emails groveling to him, begging him to listen. And then another telling Eiri that I was glad that he was no longer part of my life and that I was better off without him.

I sent some more email asking for forgiveness, and then more pleading with him to give me an answer, any answer. Every tenth or so email was like the black sheep, the obligatory “I don’t care if you believe me or not” email.

As we neared the fifty mark, I was reduced to “Just tell me it’s over and I’ll leave you alone.” I was about to give up completely when he finally answered.

That bastard always did like to make me squirm.



Ryuichi finally pulled me out of my funk by convincing me to go to the club and sing with him and Miki. Just a few more days and Tohma and Noriko would arrive and then the club thing would probably cease. Unless, of course, Tohma could figure out how to market it.

Hiro, Kyo and Suguru also joined us and, after meeting up with Miki, Tanaka-san and Ito Kenji, Suspended Animation’s lead guitarist, we had an absolute blast.

Ryu spent a lot of time convincing an audience member to record us with his digital recorder.

There was something going on in his head, some scheme he was working on, but I really didn’t want to know about it.

After we finished playing, Miki, Ryu, Tanaka-san and I went out dancing. K insisted on joining us as Miki, Ryu and I all had reputations for taking long walks on the wild side.

I tried to stay close to Miki. That way, even if the paparazzi snapped pictures of me clubbing in London, I’d be with a woman. Pictures of me bumping and grinding with a girl, Eiri could handle. At least, I thought he would be able to.

Unfortunately, Ryuichi had other ideas, and before I knew it, the two of us are giving the rest of the place quite a show. There was a certain comfort level in dancing with Ryu. We were damned good together and fuck Yuki Eiri if he couldn’t understand that. I was tired of looking over my shoulder in fear that he would catch me doing something wrong.

Fuck Yuki Eiri. What was he to me now, anyway? He was some intangible being in cyberspace that was somehow, someway, still running my life. I almost felt as though Eiri and I had reverted to our old roles. If I messed up, he would scold me. Or, worse, ignore me. It was not really sitting comfortably with me. I was not sure I could play that game again. Part of me already resented Eiri for making me play it in the first place.

Part of me wanted to run wild again, wanted to tell Hiro, Kyo and Eiri to have a nice life and disappear.

Maybe Amsterdam would be a good place to start.

When I thought about drugs and partying and being wild, I had to admit there was a part of me that really enjoyed it. A part of me that loved not having complications in my life. A part of me that now understood Eiri’s initial vehement annoyance at my intrusion into his life.

I get it now. I get why he ran away, it’s so much easier than having to stand and take the pain of a relationship and all the bullshit that goes with it. Much easier.

That night, just out of curiosity, I spoke to Miki and Ryu in great detail about what they knew about partying in Amsterdam and all of Europe, actually. They were very… informative.

It was always good to know your options, after all.


A couple of days later I received an email from Mizuki-san, Eiri’s publisher. I had assumed she was sending me an invitation for one of the publishing company’s parties. In the past, she knew that if she couldn’t get Eiri attend a party, she would work on me and I might be able to talk him into it.

There was fat chance of that happening these days.

Out of my respect for her, instead of outright deleting the email, I opened it. I shouldn’t have. I would have preferred to stay completely ignorant of the information Mizuki-san sent me. I would have preferred to have never known I could be so wrong.

That woman, that hussy that had been at Eiri’s apartment, nearly naked in Eiri’s robe, drinking out of my mug, the same woman, that had been practically climbing into Eiri’s lap at the NG party, worked with Mizuki. Suzuki Sai, that bitch, worked with Mizuki-san. Or; I guess I should say had worked with Mizuki-san.

That’s what Mizuki-san’s email was letting me know. The sorry Suzuki bitch had been fired for what she had done, or attempted to do with Eiri. The slut’s confession was included with Mizuki-san’s email.

I felt sick. Eiri had tried to tell me at the party, but I had refused to listen to him at all.

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. I had been so wrong. So convinced after the Yokohama incident that Eiri was completely untrustworthy. So quick to blame him without hearing him out. I hadn’t been very fair to him, I guess.

Fair?
And then… I remembered blinding rage and a baseball bat, flying pieces of glass and the unholy joy that surged in me as I reduced his Mercedes to a pile of rubble, carved the words “Man-Whore” over and over into the beautiful paint.

His car. “Why my car, Shuichi?” Eiri had asked me before he … before …

And I had shouted back that it was because he loved his car and because I wanted to hurt him.

Oh, gods! His car. All because I couldn’t, no, make that wouldn’t listen to him.

It was Hiro that finally came to check on me. I pointed to the laptop and Mizuki-san’s still open email.

“Well,” he said after he finished reading the email and sat down on the edge of the bed. “That’s kind of embarrassing, isn’t it?”

I nodded, “I think I’m about to lose my mind, Hiro.”

“Because you misunderstood a naked woman in Yuki-san’s apartment?” he chuckled sarcastically. “Gee, Shu, I can’t imagine how you could get the wrong idea from that scenario. A naked woman, the same woman, by-the-way that had been crawling all over him at the party. That Yuki-san had let crawl all over him as we watched, I might add. Not to mention the fact that Yuki-san was in the shower with a naked woman in his house. Can’t see at all why you would have thought something improper was going on.”

I sighed in frustration, “You make it sound so… I don’t know, normal that I would freak out about it.”

“It is normal for you, dumb ass,” he grinned at me.

I threw myself onto my back on the bed, and grabbed my head, “But, Hiro! His car. He loves his car! You didn’t see it, I totally ruined it.”

“So?” he shrugged. “I thought you were paying to get it fixed?”

“Yeah, but that wasn’t my idea,” I corrected. “Tohma sort of forced that on me. Oh, gods, Hiro! His car!”

“If you’re that worried about it,” he said quietly, “buy him a new one. You can afford it, after all.”

“Buy him a new...” I sat up and threw my arms around him, “Hiro, you’re a genius!”

“Whatever,” he said dismissively. “What kind of car are you going to get him?”

“Another Mercedes, of course. But maybe a better one. You know, top of the line!” I laughed.

Hiro nodded, “Okay. Maybe you should get Kyo’s help on this. He’s really into cars.”

“Hmm, I’m not sure Kyo would be the best choice to help me pick out something for Eiri,” I reasoned.

Hiro grinned, “Yeah, you’re probably right. Hey, Tohma’s supposed to be in later today, maybe you can ask him.”

“Tohma?” I thought about that. That sneaky guy would love to be in on this. What was I saying, he was probably behind this, at least the confession part from that Suzuki whore, anyway. But there was the added bonus that he would probably get someone to take care of everything. Yeah, I would get Tohma to help me. “That’s a great idea, Hiro!”

“Okay, then,” he nodded. “Now, will you please cook something? I’m starving and I’m afraid Kyo might try and cook again.”

“Ugh!” I cried, as I jumped to my feet. Kyo was worse at cooking than I had ever been. His cooking was… well, disgusting.

“Okay,” I grinned now that this problem was solved. “What do you want to eat?”



It was about a week later that Suguru and I were working at the studio when Tohma appeared suddenly. We stopped working as our boss entered into the room, K followed Tohma at his heels.

“Shuichi-san, may I have a word with you?” He looked grim.

“Sure, Tohma.” I studied Tohma, he looked very worried. I had a bad feeling about this. “What’s going on?”

“Have you heard from Eiri-san?”

“Eiri?” I started to panic, “Not since yesterday’s email. Did something happen to him?”

Tohma stood without moving, “He was supposed to arrive in London today. I sent a limo to pick him up, but he never showed.”

“Are you sure he made the plane? And why didn’t he tell me?” My mind was racing.

“I believe Eiri-san wanted to surprise you, that’s why he did not inform you of his intentions to come to London.” He paused, “And yes, I am certain he made the plane.”

My breathing was rapid, “So, what do we do?”

“Shuichi-san,” he said slowly, “have you seen Kyosuke today?”

“No, I…” Oh gods, my scalp began to tingle. “No. I haven’t seen Hiro, either.”

Tohma tipped his head, “Really? If Nakano-san is with him I believe that is good news.”

“You don’t think…”

“I have found that when Kyosuke is involved, the unpredictable can happen,” he said gently.

Tohma was actually concerned. Holy shit. But Kyo wouldn’t… oh, to tell the truth, I really didn’t know what Kyo was capable of.

I looked at K. The American shrugged. K was probably mad that he was missing a possible show.

“So, what do we do?” I asked again as I looked at Tohma.

“The only thing we can do, Shuichi-san,” he sighed. “We’ll have to be patient and wait.”

Oh good. Like I had ever been patient in my life.


TBC


Lyrics for Today written by Billy Corgan (Smashing Pumpkins)