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Never Forget Where You've Been	By : BishiMistress Category: +S to Z > Trinity Blood Views: 4142 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Trinity Blood, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 5
- 6
- 7
Retro Lamb: Don't worry about it. I've just seen criticism leveled at my work lately in my own reviews as well as other author's reviews and I think it's really shitty to go put down someone's work while you're in the process of praising someone else's. Especially when you don't have the decency to say anything in a review to the story you're putting down. I just wanted to set the record straight so everyone could take a breath and enjoy! I'm glad one of your questions was answered, I don't THINK I created any new ones in the chapter, but oh well, it gives you something to think about! Don't worry about the AluxAlex thing, it was just something I had to set straight, so I posted it! Not angry, not mad, just wanted it to be set straight. Enjoy the chapter and R&R please!

winterfrau: I simply don't have the time to build Alucard's character that way. I know it would have been better to develop his unshakability, but I'd have to write all these conflicts with methuselah and Vampires just to show his standard reaction and I'm trusting on the reader's part that they can read about or already know a little about Alucard's character. And I'm still not so sure about my muse. My reviews have dropped off utterly and one good chapter doesn't cut off the criticism for upcoming chapters. Glad you liked the last chapter, hopefully this one won't suck like the rest have!

Darkephoenix: I'm so glad you enjoyed the scene with Alex and Abel in the garden. Everyone else was whining about Alex and Alucard and seemed to hardly notice the interaction between the main characters :/ *hands you back your soapbox* Thanks for coming to my defense and thanks so much for your encouragement! I festered for a while and read your awesome story and that was all the repair I needed! Everyone seemed to enjoy the quiet time with Alex and Seras. I'm so happy you all liked it, because they're going to be like... quiet time buddies soon (in a platonic way of course).

Astharoshe: Glad you liked it. haven't heard from you on the last chapter! Still reading? :( Hellsing is very interesting and Alucard is like... my hero. So is integra. She's so delightfully bitchy! Go read/watch! I encourage it heavily!

DarkCrusnikMagician: Yes, she married Hugue. Wouldn't you? :P Yes, the kids are somewhere else. you will find out in this chapter, so read on and you'll see! yes, it was a flashback that Seras unintentionally interrupted. They will be in the story very very soon. I'm very eager to write about them and introduce them! Read on and review! Hope you like this chapter and thank you again for your support and encouragement!

Chapter 5: Never Free

�Alexandra.� A sing-songy voice ghosted through her dreams.

�Nnn.� Alex shifted groggily, turning away from the voice that tried, gently, to wake her. The light on the other side of her closed eyelids seemed to grow until it was bright as day, but it felt as though she�d only been asleep a matter of minutes.

�Beautiful Alexandra. Won�t you even wake up to wish your Master good morning?� A soft chuckle sent shivers down her spine, pleasurable or fearful she couldn�t tell, as her mind struggled to clear away the fog of sleep.

�Who is it?� Alex sat up, her bedchamber cast in the soft grey tones of pre-dawn. Her sleep-blurred vision focused and she found her son standing at her bedside, smiling, his unruly blonde hair half hanging in his eyes. She smiled, reaching out to him, pulling him into a hug. He crawled into bed, gangly teenager though he was, and nuzzled under her chin affectionately.

�Good morning, mom.�

�Well, it�s not quite morning yet, but you seem rather chipper, despite the hour.�

�I�m just happy to see you, that�s all.�

�Where is Ilarius?�

�He�s still with Aunt Seth.�

�Aunt Seth?� Alex shook her head slightly, her sleep addled mind taking a moment to register what her son had told her. �Ah yes, you were staying with Seth. Well, why aren�t you with your brother?�

�I needed to see you.� His tone grew deeper and more serious, something Cendricus rarely was.

�Why? What�s wrong?� Alex pulled him away from her to better look into his face. His bangs hid his eyes, but he wore a wicked grin, a grin that unsettled her. She shook him gently, prompting him for an explanation. �Cendricus, what�s the matter? Why have you left the safety of your Aunt�s care and why are you here to see me? What�s so urgent?�

When Cendricus raised his head, his bangs shifted of their own accord, revealing the sinister red glow they cast. Alex gasped and released him from her grip as if he�d burned her. His smile broadened, revealing his fangs. His wings sprouted from his shoulder blades and instead of the usual raven-like black, his wings erupted a blinding, shimmering, white. Alex was frozen in time and space, utterly unable to move away from her son, even as his face lengthened and matured before her very eyes, becoming his father�s perfect likeness. Cain stood by her bedside, looming over her, a questionable grin plastered on his features.

�Have you missed me, Alexandra?�

�Vile creature.� Alex�s voice came as a frightened whisper, her breath coming in shuddering gasps. Try as she might, she was unable to command her body to move away from him.

�Ah, I see you have discovered what I have discovered. Your will is not always your own, my Beautiful Alexandra. I have longed to see you, to see what I made of you.�

�You made nothing of me. I have made me, Hugue has made me, and my children have made me!� Alex�s hissed words slipped between her clenched teeth. Cain laughed, his hair swirling in a playful breeze. He reached out and brushed his fingertips over her cheek. Her mind revolted against his touch, but her body was still frozen.

�Never forget who owns your life, Alexandra. I have made you, I control you, and you are forever indebted to me.� Cain held his hand just in front of her trembling chest, splaying his fingers as he locked eyes with her. Alex could feel the buzz of the machines in her body, gritting her teeth as they activated against her will. Her hair roiled in an unseen tempest, her fangs elongating over her lower lip, her wings bursting painfully from her back, her nails growing into dangerous claws.

�No, please! Don�t do this to me.� Alex hated the pleading note present under her Crusnik rasp.

�My lovely Alexandra.� Cain�s features settled into the most beautiful expression of wonderment as he took in her Crusnik features, cradling her face in his hands. �You are fearsome in your beauty and your strength. I will come back to reclaim you before long, my love. Don�t worry...� Cain leaned in to press his lips to hers and Alex�s mind and body was flooded with a panic that would have sent a Terran into shock. She fought with all her will power to move, but found that Cain drew closer and closer despite her efforts. When his lips were but a breath away, Alex let loose a soul-shattering scream.

�No!� Alex awoke to her empty bedroom, shafts of early morning sun bathing the carpet of her room. Her cry rang painfully in her pointed ears, as she threw herself out of bed, spinning around to search the room for the subject of her nightmares. The room was empty, and Alex gripped her chest unconsciously, her claws scratching her own skin. She felt her teeth and pricked her finger on an overly large fang. Frantic, she struggled to calm herself, her thundering heart and ragged breath. She had just about managed to settle herself when the door to her room came flying open, the gleam of a gun flashing in the morning light.

�Lady Alexandra are you--� Tres felt a rush of air as Alex�s Crusnik weapon was leveled at his throat. He looked at her disheveled hair and her wide tear-filled eyes in alarm, immediately holstering his weapon. He could see the tip of her blood-sword trembling in her fright. �Alex, it�s just me. It�s just Tres.� He flashed her a gentle smile, but she shook her head violently.

�There�s no way. No way to tell.� Her tremulous proclamation confused him, but he remained calm, hoping to produce the same feeling in Alex.

�Alex, I am Father Iqus. You are at the Vatican.� She shook her head again, snarling under her breath, her fangs flashing intimidatingly.

�Mother! Bring me Mother!� Her voice was not as present as it usually was under the timber of her Crusnik voice, and for the first time, Tres felt some measure of fear in the presence of someone he considered to be a close friend.

�Yes, Lady Alexandra!� Tres turned and left the room, his eyes wide in shock. She lowered her weapon, letting it dissolve and seep back into her skin. Her blood was ablaze, the machines within her screaming through her body on high alert. She felt like a hideous witch for evoking the look on Tres�s face, but she was so disquieted by her nightmare that she refused to come close to anyone that Cain had used against her in his long-ago abuse. Seeing Tres�s face, accompanied by the casual tone of his voice send her mind flying through images she would sooner lock away forever. Her mind wasn�t allowed to relive it�s torture long; Lady Catherina arrived moments later, Tres in toe.

�Alexandra! The entire building heard your scream. What is Heaven�s name is the matter?� Catherina�s voice wasn�t scolding, instead it revealed the upset she�d first felt when hearing such a familiar scream. The relief that washed over her at seeing her adopted daughter safe and in one piece, dragged a loud sigh from her lips.

�Mother?� Alex�s eyes became huge and utterly round, giving her the look of a five year old that had scraped her knee. Her Crusnik features immediately melted away and she became the Terran Alexandra once more.

�Yes, Alexandra. Who else would I be?� Catherina smiled at Alex and spread her arms in welcome. Alex stumbled, her eyes swimming with blood tears as she ran to embrace the Cardinal.

�Mother!� Alex tried to reign in her emotions before she crushed the older woman in her arms, but even as her emotions welled and spilled over, she could feel the blonde woman absorbing them all, siphoning them off to be released back into the atmosphere. Tres watched the exchange curiously, still quite on edge from Alex�s rejection. The whole situation was all the more alarming considering Alex�s generally quiet, often melancholy mood. The Cardinal had managed to calm the raven haired woman, petting her hair softly and murmuring to her comfortingly, by the time Abel skidded into the room, his hair loose and flowing about him.

�Alexandra, what�s wrong?� He was slightly out of breath and his brows were knit in concern, his blue eyes glittering curiously. Alex raised her head and peaked over Catherina�s shoulder at him. Her rounded eyes took in his appearance from head to toe and for a moment she wanted nothing more than to fling herself at him and let him hold her. She fought against the emotion, telling herself she should feel nothing but anger for the beautiful priest. She turned her face away, hiding behind Lady Catherina�s shoulder once more.

�It was just a nightmare, Abel. Alex is fine.� Catherina continued to pet Alex and Abel�s face grew dark and troubled.

�A nightmare about who?� The air in the room seemed to still and become stale, stifling to everyone present. All eyes turned to Abel, but he didn�t move or react until the object of his focus leveled her gaze on him. Alexandra looked up slowly, her glare intense and brooding. She straightened herself up, standing, but couldn�t, or wouldn�t, answer his question. She merely continued to gaze at him as her hair smoothed itself out, gathering and twisting of it�s own accord. Her hands hung limp at her side as her hair gathered itself into a neat bun at the back of her head. She turned and approached the bed, fidgeting with the covers, making the bed. Abel moved to follow her.

�Abel, please--� Catherina whispered, reaching out to stop him as he approached Alex, but he turned and smiled warmly at her.

�I just want to speak with her privately. I won�t upset her, I promise.� His eyes were pleading and Catherina argued inwardly before finally turning to gather Tres and leave. Alex heard the door of her room close and felt Abel approach her, but she continued to straighten the sheets, steadfastly ignoring him.

�Alexandra?� She didn�t respond, unable to speak in light of the irrational fear that gripped her, stole her breath with each passing second. Abel stepped closer still, his warm hands wrapping around her upper arms from behind. She jumped at the contact and struggled to pull away. He pulled her back against his chest comfortingly and she melted into his embrace despite herself, her fear ebbing.

�Abel, let me go.�

�Why? Why can�t I comfort you? Why won�t you talk to me about what�s bothering you? Tell me what you saw, Alexandra.� Alex turned to face him, her jaw set tight in anger, her eyes glimmering with long-buried rage.

�And who the hell are you to demand that of me? It�s fine for you to cast me aside one moment for a shitty situation I had no control over, yet the next second you demand to comfort me, to stand so close to me?� Abel�s face sank into an expression of deepest contrition and Alex immediately felt terrible for saying it. Abel leaned in, the tip of his nose brushing against hers and Alex closed her eyes tightly, struggling to pull away. Abel held her fast, one of the few times he actually forced her to remain in his grasp.

�I have no right to ask anything of you, Alexandra. I lost all rights when cast you away, but I have realized my mistake. It was the greatest mistake of my life and I can only pray that you will come to forgive me in time. Have I not told you that I�m willing to wait?� Abel leaned in, his eyes searching hers as his lips grew closer to her own.

�Abel.� Alex�s whisper sounded like a plea, for him to stop or continue, neither knew. Their lips met, and a lone tear slipped down Alex�s cheek. She fought him initially, shoving weakly against his chest. He ignored her struggle and rubbed her back soothingly until she melted into him, returning the kiss. Alex�s thoughts were plagued with guilt, flashing through images of her husband, his gaze always warm and loving. Even so, she couldn�t deny that on some level it felt right to be with Abel, to let him comfort her. When his fingers brushed up the back of her neck and loosened her bun, letting her hair fall against her back, she shivered, but didn�t protest.

�Alexandra.� Abel�s voice was thick with emotion, desperation, pleading, as he moved to cover the smooth column of her neck in kisses. Alex shuddered, her fingers threading into Abel�s loose silver hair. He let loose a soft growl against her skin that she felt more than heard, and Alex whimpered softly in his ear. She finally pulled away from him as he moved her oversized t-shirt aside to kiss her shoulder.

�Abel, please.�

�What�s wrong?� He looked into her eyes, his own clouded with confusion.

�I can�t...� Alex shook her head and hid behind her hair. Abel slipped his long fingers against her pale cheek and turned her face up so he could look at her.

�I�m sorry. I shouldn�t have pushed you.� Abel�s expression was so sorrowful that it tore at Alex, making her regret how far they�d just gone.

�I shouldn�t have led you on.� Alex sighed quietly, miserably, her guilt returning full-force.

�Were you leading me on?� Alex flushed under his unwavering gaze, feeling ashamed.

�Yes.�

�Did you feel nothing, Alexandra?� He drew close to her again, his lips painfully close, but not quite touching. He watched her, her breath hitching in light of their proximity.

�I didn�t say that.� Abel smiled, a sorrowful beautiful smile.

�Fair enough.� He kissed her forehead and gave her some space, smiling warmly at her. �Tell me about your dream.�

�I�d rather show you.� Alex reached up tentatively, tracing his silver eyebrow with her fingertips and as she touched him, he was shown the images of her dream. He marveled quietly at the way she made the dream so coherent, so smooth. She had grown a talent for sharing mental images.

�It was Cain?�

�Yes.�

�But it wasn�t just a dream, was it?� She looked at him for several moments before shaking her head in negation.

�No. It was him. When I woke up, I was in Crusnik form and it took several minutes for me to make the machines stand down. I was so flooded with adrenaline that they wouldn�t accept that I wasn�t in danger.

�Do you believe it was just the adrenaline? Or do you think Cain somehow wields some amount of control over them?� Alex looked up into his face, her own painted with worry.

�I don�t know.� Alex�s voice came out so small and terrified that she sickened herself, scolding herself silently for her weakness. Abel regarded her for a few moments before pulling her into a tight embrace.

�Don�t worry about it, Alex. It was probably just a dream.� Abel�s voice conveyed confidence and she basked in the warmth of his comforting manner. She stood on tiptoe and kissed him one more time, swallowing her guilt as his arms wrapped around her waist, promising her protection from her fears and woes. She nuzzled into his chest and he kissed the top of her head.

�Let�s go. We have training with the members of Hellsing today, and we should get some breakfast.� Alex nodded, moving into her bathroom to change. Abel smiled, noticing that she hadn�t asked him to leave while she did so.
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Never Forget Where You've Been