Kumagoro\'s New Shiny

**Typical fanfic warnings—we don’t own Gravi or it’s characters. Please be respectful to our originals and not use them without asking. This fic takes place near the end of Ryuichi’s time in America, shortly before the beginning of the anime.

Major angst warnings—if you’re hoping for a constantly bouncing Ryu-chan, this isn’t the fic to read. -_- This is angst angst angst, so read at your own risk!

//= Thoughts
*= emphasis
::= speaking in Japanese
**


Kumagoro’s New Shiny
Chapter Seven


When Jace snuck back into the apartment he and Tracy shared, it was just past nine in the morning. Ryuichi had finally, after several sporadic meetings, convinced him to stay the night, and he was still wearing down from that euphoria. It was a risk, he knew, but if he could slip into bed without Tracy noticing....

Tracy met him at the door to his room, arms crossed as the boy tried to slip past him. His eyes were narrowed. //Damnit Jace.// \"You\'re back late,\" he commented sarcastically.

Jace froze; a moment later he grinned sheepishly and scratched the back of his head. \"Um...late night?\" he replied. He made a detour toward the small kitchen. \"Man, I\'m hungry....\"

Tracy followed him. \"You were gone all night, and you weren\'t walking,\" he persisted. His eyes narrowed as he took up position against the kitchen doorway. \"You were with that cracked out singer again.\"

\"He\'s not on crack,\" Jace protested, managing to keep his voice light. \"And so what?\" When it seemed that Tracy wasn\'t about to let him escape he sank into the couch. \"I\'ll have enough for Ulrich by the end of the week.\"

\"And what about rent?\" he persisted. \"Electric? Water?\" Tracy moved closer to stand directly in front of his roommate. \"You\'ve been spending more and more time with that guy, and it\'s going to get you in trouble--both of you!\" //How can you be so stupid, Jace?// \"You know how Ulrich is about his walkers, especially when they starting getting stupid ass ideas like not charging the regulars.\"

\"Did I say I wasn\'t charging him?\" Jace countered, looking away. He crossed his arms childishly. \"And don\'t I always come up with my fair share? I\'m better than you, after all.\"

\"So are you quitting then?\" he challenged. \"Fuck man, I saw that stupid bunny in your room--what the hell\'s going on? You know better than to hook up with someone like that! Ulrich will skin you both.\"

\"Nothing is going on,\" Jace protested, pushing abruptly to his feet. \"It\'s just a job--I\'m allowed to have a life outside work, right? That\'s all it is.\" He tried again for his bedroom. \"If I can get the money to you and Ulrich, what\'s the big deal?\"

Tracy grabbed his shoulder and shoved him back onto the couch. \"I know he paid for the hospital,\" he persisted. \"And now you\'re speg thg the night. It\'s sounding like...you\'re a couple.\" He leaned closer to meet the other\'s eyes. \"Have a life if you want,\" he muttered lowly. \"But you\'re being a damn fool. If he\'s paying, he\'ll eventually stop. They always do, Jace--they *always* move on.\"

\"I know that,\" Jace muttered bitterly, though he was taking Tracy seriously. He met the other\'s eyes. \"Don\'t you think I know that? I\'ve been doing this longer than you.\" His fists tightened. \"He\'ll move on. Might as well milk it while I can.\"

His eyes narrowed. //You\'re not fooling me.// \"Fine.\" Straightening, he started towards their bedrooms. \"Then I guess I should just throw out that obnoxious stuffed kid\'s toy.\"

\"Hey!\" Feeling a sudden thrill of entirely misplaced panic, Jace chased after him and tugged him away from the door. \"Just leave it alone, all right?\" he said, a bit too loudly. \"I\'m taking care of myself--that\'s all that matters.\"

\"Bullshit.\" Tracy backed away, glaring at his roommate. \"You\'re so full of shit, Jace. You\'re gonna fuck everything up if you keep seeing him, you know. You\'re gonna get your ass beat if you even come up five bucks short with Url, and I seriously doubt your lover-boy will keep covering it.\"

Jace shivered a little. //I know.// He sank against the arm of the sofa, his eyes lowered. \"He\'s....\" //I can\'t fight them both. And it\'s not like I haven\'t told myself all this....// \"He\'s not paying,\" he heard himself confess.

Tracy\'s eyes narrowed. \"Fuck, Jace.\" He paused his retreat, hands transferring to his hips. \"Then you gotta cut it--now. You hear me?\" He moved a step closer. \"Honestly Jace, you no better than to go handing out free ass, especially to those manipulative rock bitches.\"

\"He\'s not like that!\" Jace protested, but he quickly lowered his voice once more, as if someone might hear. He gulped. \"He really does want to help. He just doesn\'t get it. And I...can\'t take his money.\"

He rolled his eyes. \"Christ. When did you become such an innocent.\" Tracy finally came close enough to set a hand on the other\'s shoulder. \"He wants ass, Jace. That\'s all those stage rejects care about.\"

Jace tried to shrug his hand off. \"It\'s not about him. He offered to give me money and I wouldn\'t take it, all right?\" He sagged a little. \"I know it\'s dumb.\"

\"Damn right it\'s \'dumb,\'\" he muttered in reply, pulling away again. \"You put an end to it, you hear? Get out of it before you start falling behind, okay?\"

\"I won\'t fall behind,\" Jace assured, though he couldn\'t bring himself to face the other. \"We\'ll go downtown, tonight--I\'ll make it up.\" He frowned sharply. \"You\'re right. I\'ll...I\'ll stop.\"

Tracy nodded firmly. \"Good.\" He crouched down enough to pull the other boy into a hug. \"You know I\'m just looking out for you,\" he murmured in his ear. \"Right?\"

\"I know, Trace.\" Jace smiled grimly as he hugged him back. \"And I\'d do the same for you.\" His arms tightened abruptly. \"Just be nice to me, okay? It\'s not that easy.\"

He snorted. \"My ass.\" Tracy pulled back with a faint grin. \"Just take care of it, okay? I don\'t want you to get hurt.\" He kissed his roommate briefly and ruffled his hair. \"I\'m getting to bed. See you in a few.\"

\"Yeah.\" Jace smiled and nodded, pushing upright once more. \"I\'ll make you something to eat when you wake up,\" he offered. \"Anything in particular?\"

\"Coffee,\" he replied immediately, laughing. \"Ooh, and that grilled cheese thing you make.\" Tracy waved as he headed down the short hall. \"\'Night!\"

\"Night!\" Jace called after him. But as soon as Tracy was out of sight his expression crumbled, and he sank back onto the couch with a low sigh. //Stop seeing him.// He pressed his face into the cushions. //I\'ve been telling myself that all along.//

---

Ryuichi was nearly shaking from nervousness as he hit the speed-dial on his phone. //Please let him be awake and not out already.// He glanced at the clock--still early, barely after five in the afternoon, but he could never really be sure. It had been nearly three days since he\'d spoken to Jace, and the absence had taken a bigger toll on him that he would have liked to admit to anyone.

\"Just pick up the phone,\" he murmured, hugging Kumagoro tightly. \"Pick up the phone....\"

Jace had been heading for the door when the phone rang--he\'d intended to go out early that night and finish getting the rest of his money for the week. The familiar ring caused his heart to jump and, swallowing hard, he slowly turned. He let it ring four, almost five times before finally picking it up. //Shit.// \"Hello?\"

Ryuichi sighed explosively. \"Hey--I almost thought you were already out.\" His fingers curled as he danced in place. \"Listen, I need to talk to you. Can I see you?\" //Please....//

Jace pressed his eyes shut. //Ryuichi....// \"No,\" he made himself say. \"I can\'t. I was just on my way out.\"

His stomach dropped. \"It won\'t take long,\" he persisted. \"I can even meet you, if that\'s easier.\" Ryuichi started pacing the room. \"Please? It\'s still really early. Pretty please?\"

\"I can\'t,\" Jace repeated, harsher than before. \"I\'m already short as it is.\" He cringed--he hadn\'t wanted to say that. \"Try me in the morning.\" Not wanting to hear Ryuichi plead any more he abruptly hung up the phone.

Ryuichi\'s face twisted. //No way, damnit.// He hit the redial and waited impatiently. \"No fucking way.\"

Jace scowled at the phone, but picked it up after the second ring anyway. \"I can\'t!\" he all but shouted, frustration making his voice pitch strangely. \"This is my job, all right? I\'m not fooling around!\"

\"Neither am I!\" he snapped back, clutching Kumagoro tighter. \"Can\'t I even ask for fifteen minutes? That\'s it! Please?\" Ryuichi closed his eyes, fighting to keep his voice from catching. \"Just a few minutes.\"

Jace trembled, glancing about--Tracey had alr gon gone out for some food before he started his own night, and probably wouldn\'t be back. \"I\'ll wait for you here,\" he said quietly. And then he hung up again.

Relieved by at least that much, Ryuichi practically flew to the door, stuffing his phone in his pocket and barely remembering to pull on his shoes. //I can do this--he\'ll have to agree.//

He took a cab to Jace\'s apartment building, nearly bouncing out of the seat the whole way. They had barely pulled to a stop when he was racing up the stairway and knocking on the right door. //Jace--you\'ll agree, right?//

Jace hesitated, and then he was pulling the door open. He tried not to wince when he was faced with Ryuichi, huffing and anxiously. He stepped aside. \"Come in.\"

\"Thanks,\" he panted, moving into the tiny apartment. It wasn\'t until then that he realized he was still clutching Kumagoro, and he gave it a brief squeeze before moving to sit on the couch. Ryuichi looked up at the boy, and felt a bit of his tension ease just slightly. \"Thanks for letting me come.\"

\"You can\'t stay,\" Jace reminded him, closing the door before moving around in front of the sofa. He crossed his arms. //Tracy would kill me if he knew he was here.// \"What is it?\"

//Best to just say it,// he thought, licking his lips. \"I\'m going back to Japan,\" he stated bluntly, gaze fixed on Jace to be sure of his reaction. \"I\'ve done everything I can here, musically. So I\'m going back.\"

Jace\'s stomach dropped into his feet, and his face went pale. //He\'s…going back.// He clenched his fists as he glanced away. //Of course he is. It…wasn\'t going to last.// \"I see.\"

Ryuichi shifted faintly, hands shaking. \"I want you to come with me.\"

\"No,\" Jace replied before he\'d even heard what the question was--he wasn\'t even sure what he thought Ryuichi was about to say. But then he blinked, staring down at Ryuichi in surprise. \"What?\"

His eyes widened. \"Come with me,\" he repeated. \"I want you to come with me to Japan. I\'ve thought it all out,\" he assured, moving closer to the edge of the couch. Kumagoro was nearly squished in his lap from the tension in his hands. \"Come with me.\"

Jace stared at him blankly. \"I can\'t,\" he said quietly, his face twisting in confusion. \"I don\'t understand--just leave? Live in Japan?\" //Is he crazy?//

\"Yes.\" Ryuichi reached out suddenly, tugging the boy down onto the couch with him so he could better meet his eyes. \"Live in Japan. But not just live.\" His voice rose in hopeful excitement. \"Work, too. Work for me, as my assistant in the studio and whatever. Get a paycheck and everything.\"

Jace tried to scoot away from him, feeling something akin to panic curl suddenly in his stomach. He didn\'t know what to think. \"No--no, what are you talking about? That\'s....\" He grimaced. \"Ryu, that\'s crazy.\"

He laughed. \"I know--I know it is! But why not?\" Ryuichi\'s shoulders hunched as he hugged Kumagoro tightly, feeling his lungs tremble at the continued denial. \"It would be a new start, right? A fresh beginning. And it wouldn\'t be so bad, working for me, right?\" //Please, Jace. Please just say yes.//

\"It\'s...\" Jace pushed shakily to his feet. \"It\'s not that easy,\" he said quietly. \"To just...start over like that....\" //If it was that easy…if it was that easy all along, I....// \"What\'s the point?\ sho shouted suddenly. \"That won\'t change what I\'ve been--what I am!\"

Ryuichi\'s eyes widened even further until they almost burned. \"I don\'t care about all that,\" he replied, voice shaking. \"And no one will know anything about it except for me.\" His lips trembled as he attempted a smile. \"And I love you anyway.\"

\"You....\" Jace trembled, forcing himself to meet Ryuichi\'s gaze. He gulped. \"You do...?\" he whispered.

Ryuichi stood as well, leaving Kumagoro behin the the couch as he approached the younger boy. Making a fist, he knocked Jace very lightly on the side of the head. \"Of course, silly,\" he replied, just as softly, his throat closing painfully around the words.

Jace lowered his head. //He does…?// He sniffled, wiping his face against his arm. \"Don\'t...be so dumb,\" he muttered. But then he stepped forward, bumping against Ryuichi\'s chest. \"It doesn\'t make any sense.\"

Ryuichi wrapped his arms around Jace\'s thin shoulders. \"Does it have to?\" he returned. His grip tightened. \"What does it matter? I love you. I....\" He turned his face into the boy\'s neck as his chin began to tremble. \"I don\'t want to go back without you.\"

\"Ryu....\" Jace sagged against him. \"I don\'t know,\" he confessed softly. \"Even if I just leave...Tracy will be....\" He shivered. \"Ulrich might take it out on him, if I go. I don\'t want him to get hurt....\"

\"So I\'ll give you an advance on your ch\" h\" he replied, refusing to relax his hold. \"Whatever it will take to make them both happy.\" Ryuichi chuckled softly. \"He won\'t be worse than my manager, I promise you, and if either of them want trouble, he can take care of it.\"

\"But Ryu....\" Jace sighed; he wasn\'t sure he had the strength to fight him any longer. \"How long?\" he asked softly. \"How long do I have, to...think about it?\"

\"Well, Tohma\'s been insisting I hurry, but there\'s no real rush.\" He pulled back just enough to see the other, touching his cheek. \"Four days at the most, so we can get your ticket and everything.\" Ryuichi licked his lips, head tilting hopefully. \"You\'ll really think about it?\" he asked meekly.

\"Yeah....\" Jace bit his lip nervously, and managed a weak smile. \"Um...thanks. I mean...I\'m happy, I really am.\" His shoulders crept up. \"It\'s just...a really big deal. I have to think about it.\"

He nodded, feeling the clamp around his chest finally release. \"I know, but I\'m serious; you will be working, but it will be a real job. It won\'t be easy.\" Ryuichi grinned and pulled him closain.ain. \"But I\'ll help.\"

Jace turned his face against Ryuichi\'s shoulder. //Going to Japan will mean…meeting more people around him.// He cringed a little. //His manager. His band. His friends....// \"Doesn\'t it bother you?\" he asked quietly. \"I\'m still going to go out tonight....\"

Ryuichi sighed quietly, arms tightening. \"If...if you really feel you have to, then I\'ll have to accept it. I\'ve already said I\'d help--I won\'t bug you about it again.\" Turning his head, he touched a soft kiss to Jace\'s cheek. \"As long as you\'re careful.\"

\"I\'m always careful....\" Though by now Jace felt faintly ill--he wasn\'t sure if he\'d be able to go out after all. He took in a deep breath and kissed Ryuichi\'s cheek. \"You should go,\" he said quietly. \"I\'ll call you. Soon.\"

\"Okay.\" Ryuichi touched his cheek with a faint smile. \"I\'ll be expecting it.\" He held on a moment longer, wishing he could think of another reason to stay, but he finally had to back away. \"Talk to you soon,\" he said as he scooped Kumagoro back up and headed for the door.

Jace watched him, but just before Ryuichi could slip outside he shuddered, and called out, \"I love you, too!\"

Ryuichi froze, eyes wideJaceJace....\" He turned, looking at the boy over his shoulder, and he grinned. //He loves me. He does love me.// Ryuichi blew him a kiss and Kumagoro waved. \"Call me soon.\"

Jace smiled, and once the door had closed Ryuichi out he moved forward, locking it behind him. He sighed softly. //What am I going to do?// He pressed his back against the door as he tried to get his thoughts back in order.

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