Something In-Between

Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation nor do I make any money from using the characters.

NC-17

If you have time, please review. I have been shamefully remiss in thanking all of my wonderful reviewers. I am totally serious when I say that without you, there would be no story.

Thank you!!


Note: I have had a string of bad luck concerning this silly story, so once again, I apologize for the delay. Also, I don’t know if anyone has noticed other than myself and my poor, abused betas, but every chapter seems to be longer than the last. It is as if the story never wants to end.

As for my poor, abused betas, Kri and Ashcat, thanks to both of you for holding me back from the brink of destruction. Who knew fanfiction was such a dangerous game? It certainly has done a number on my brain.

Anyway, I think this is what everyone has been waiting for, so on with the show.

Something In-Between

Chapter 7
Tenderness


I don't know when to start or when to stop
My luck's like a button
I can't stop pushing it
My head feels light
But I'm still in the dark
Seems like without tenderness there's something missing
Tenderness
Where is the
Tenderness
Where is it?

I don't know where I am but I know I don't like it
I open my mouth and out pops something spiteful
Words are so cheap, but they can turn out expensive
Words like conviction can turn into a sentence

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

It was dark and I seemed to be floating in a sea of gentle confusion that I knew was wrong. I could hear voices talking softy close by, getting louder as my consciousness lethargically returned to me.

“Are you sure about this? I think that Shuichi is going to be very angry with us. Furious, even. He’s strangely protective of Yuki, you know. In spite of everything that the bastard has put him through.”

Was that Nakano?

“Just goes to show you how truly odd their relationship is. After all, I don’t think I’d be ‘strangely protective’ of someone that tried to kill me. And really, I’m certain everything will turn out for the best. And you always know how to settle Shuichi down, Hiroshi.”

Ngah. I knew that voice. That was definitely Inoue.

“Kyosuke… I don’t think now is a good time for this,” Nakano’s voice suddenly dropped an octave, it almost sound as if he was… “Kyo… suke…” Yeah, he was, all right.

I was aware that my wrists, arms, and shoulders hurt. I tried to move them. Ah, that was why they hurt. My wrists were bound with something metal and my arms were tied very securely behind me and to the chair I was sitting on. Apparently, while I was out, I had been resting all my weight on my arms. I sat up straighter, giving my aching limbs some relief. I tentatively tried to move my feet, but they were also tied very tightly. Hmm. I tested my movement ability. I had absolutely none. Crude, but very effective.

“Look, Hiroshi,” I heard Inoue say with a mocking whisper. “I think Yuki-san wants to watch.”

“Hardly,” I managed to say. My mouth was very dry. I blinked furiously. Everything was a little… fuzzy.

“Thirsty?” Inoue asked with a sly grin.

“What did you…?”

“Chloroform to knock you out so we could subdue you; Sodium Pentothal after that.” His grin continued as he nodded, “Yes, I admit it’s a little on the extreme side and very underhanded, but it is effective. You see, I have a couple of guys in my employment that excel at this kind of thing, but I’m afraid that they are not very imaginative. They tend to stick to the classics, however lowbrow they might be. I have to say, though, that I’m rather disappointed that you turned out to be such an easy mark, Yuki-san.”

I glared at him.

He moved to sit on a long table opposite from me, continuing to give me that smug smile. “I don’t know why, but you and I seem to have a difficult time communicating with each other. We either end up in a tussle or you try and kill somebody, you know things of that nature. So, I took special measures this time to make sure that we could have a complete conversation without any interruptions.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m nosy and nobody will tell me what you did to Shuichi. And by nobody, I mean Shuichi. You and he are the only ones who know what you did to him before he left for London. Since he wouldn’t tell me, well, I thought that you might be persuaded to share what happened.”

Pulling his long legs onto the table he crossed them. Placing his right elbow on his knee, he rested his chin on his hand, and stared at me with those penetrating green eyes.

I was struck by the familiarity of his body language. His subtle movements were identical to… “You look like Tohma,” I laughed. “The family resemblance is amazing.”

I heard a gasp.

“What is it Hiroshi?” Inoue asked.

“I’ve never heard him laugh before, that’s all,” Nakano said as he moved next to Inoue. “I didn’t think it possible.”

“So, Yuki-san,” Inoue oozed at me, “do you know who I am? What I come from? I think perhaps you do.”

By bringing up his family history was it Inoue’s intent to intimidate or scare me? Because fear is not what I was feeling. It was strange and rather overly dramatic to be in some warehouse, who knew where, drugged and tied up with a gangster glaring at me. I found it to be too much like bad cinema. I suppose I should have been scared. I did, in fact, know what Inoue was capable of, but at the moment all I felt was irritation. Of course, irritation was what I felt in most situations.

Maybe what I was really feeling was nicotine withdrawal.

I changed the subject, “I suppose you want to know what I did, too, eh, Nakano?”

“Yes, Yuki-san,” he glared at me. “I do. He was a mess when we got on the plane. He hasn’t really been the same since. Did you,” he caught his breath, “rape him?”

“Almost, but, no. I didn’t.” I shook my head, surprised and slightly pissed off that I had answered him. Stupid drugs, they always did make me act like an idiot.

“Almost…?” Nakano said very quietly. “How is that better? And why? You, of all people had to know what that would do to him, how fragile he is about that kind of treatment. Why would you let yourself lose control like that?”

“None of your business,” I snarled giving him my best glare. How was “almost” better than actually raping him? The same question I had asked myself many times and had avoided dealing with until now, that is. That fucking Nakano, he always did have a knack for finding the most painful part of the scab and tugging on it.

As if he could read my mind, Nakano’s eyes suddenly darkened and, clenching his fists, he took a step forward and popped me in the mouth. The force of the blow knocked my head back into the chair and, for a moment, I saw stars. Inoue immediately snaked an arm around the guitarist’s waist and pulled him back. Soothingly, the taller man said, “Okay, okay, that’s enough, Hiroshi. You were supposed to be keeping me in line, remember? Not the other way around.”

Still giving me a look that could kill, Nakano nodded and stepped back.

My lip was split and I could taste the ferric flavor of my own blood. Strangely enough, I felt that Shuichi’s best friend striking me was acceptable, maybe even necessary. Nakano was right, in comparison to what I had done to Shuichi… a split lip and a headache was child’s play. Suddenly, my memory reminded me of a wild Nakano bursting through my apartment door and attacking me.

Perhaps it was not Inoue that I should fear.

“Besides,” Inoue taunted as he pulled Nakano back towards him, wrapping both arms around the other man and placing his chin on Nakano’s shoulder as he looked over at me. His eyes were bright with smug mischief, “I already know why he did it. You know, too, Hiro-kun.”

Nakano tipped his head to look at Inoue, “Because of you?”

“Because of me,” Inoue nodded, still keeping eye contact with me. “Because I touched Shuichi, because Shuichi let me have him. Shuichi let me make love to him and knowing that made you completely lose it. Am I correct, Yuki-san? You were angry because someone else touched your pet.”

“Pet?” I spat at him, my blood boiling hotter with every word he said to me. How dare he make me visualize that!

“Pet: A domesticated animal kept for pleasure rather than utility,” Inoue nodded. “You expected him to run to you like a happy puppy when you returned to Tokyo didn’t you? I don’t think you were prepared for the fact that he had become feral. That happens when pets are abandoned and left to their own devices. They either learn to survive on their own or they die. Or,” he smiled again, his voice dripping with venomous amusement, “sometimes they find someone else to take care of them.”

I tried to rip my wrists free of their metal confines, pulling hard enough that I tore my own skin. I could feel the blood slide down my wrists and on to my hands as I struggled to release myself, so I could… I could…

“Tch. I think he wants to hurt me, Hiroshi,” Inoue mocked, still watching me over Nakano’s shoulder.

“You’re fucking right, I want to hurt you!” I snarled as my anger burst free. “Shuichi and I were just fine until you came along and fucked everything up!”

“Really? Did you hear that?” The green-eyed demon continued to taunt me as he spoke to Nakano. “They were just fine before I came along.”

“Was that before, or after you left him and went to New York?” Nakano hissed at me with righteous anger. “Before or after Kyosuke saved him from withering away? Before or after he turned into you and hurt everyone that… loves… him?”

“Hey, take it easy, Hiroshi,” Inoue soothed the other man as he stroked his hair.

“How can you keep hurting him if you love him?” Nakano asked as his voice cracked with emotion. “How can you keep doing that, even if you hated him?”

Images assaulted me. I saw Shuichi tumbling down a flight of stairs after I hit him. Shuichi standing in front of my car with his arms outstretched pleading with me to stay. Shuichi curled into a ball, his clothes in tatters as he sobbed hysterically.

I closed my eyes.

There was Shuichi with eyes of fury, striking me hard enough to knock me out. Shuichi drunk and taunting me with spiteful, cruel words. Shuichi turning his back on me and walking away. And then a Shuichi in total and utter confusion when Inoue reappeared. And my burning, all-consuming jealousy, my fear that I had lost him before I had a chance to get him back.

I’d left him for so long, essentially turning my back on him, why would I be surprised that he would find someone else?

“But he didn’t, Yuki-san,” Inoue’s voice called me back from the sea of images I had been swimming in. “Shuichi was never in love with me. He wanted to be, he might have even convinced himself that he was, but he couldn’t break the hold you had on him. Even when he finally let me make love to him, it wasn’t because he was in love with me. It was to get even with you.“

I stared at him.

He smiled sadly at me and nodded, “It’s true. He even called out your name.”

Shuichi had called my name? I had the most unusual mix of feelings. Envy, fury, sorrow, smugness and, finally, a sliver of hope.

“And then he punched me, Yuki-san. And took my car while I lay unconscious on the floor. Not really a shining memory for me, I have to say.” Inoue watched me closely with a grimace, “I think you can understand why I sincerely hope my little encounter with Shuichi was not what made you “almost” rape him. He used me, Yuki-san, because he was angry with you.”

Was this what the two of them were trying to “explain” to me? That my fucked-up relationship with Shuichi had spilled over and affected so many other lives? I didn’t feel bad for Inoue, of course, but I couldn’t escape the sudden feeling that I was partially responsible. Perhaps. Maybe I was the reason Shuichi… did what he did?

“Let me ask you something, Yuki-san,” Nakano said quietly after a moment or two of silence. “What was New York like without Shuichi? How did it feel to blow off his desperate phone calls? Did that give you pleasure? Do you have any idea what it was like to watch him get back a piece of mail from you marked “refused”? No, I guess you wouldn’t, would you? You were safe and secure 7,000 miles removed from what you had done to him.”

He inhaled deeply before he continued his quiet tirade, “You didn’t get to see K and I drag him from your empty apartment. He clawed at the floor and the doorways with such determination he ripped his own fingernails off, screaming that you would be mad when you came back and he wasn’t there. You didn’t get to hear him say on a daily basis that he knew you were coming back soon. You didn’t see him refuse to eat and whither down to skeletal size when “soon” wasn’t soon enough. New York saved you from seeing any of it, from taking any responsibility for what you did to him, you prick! And I still don’t know why you bothered to come back. Did you think you would just be able to walk back into his life and pick up where you left off?”

New York, I shivered with the memory of that pain. My eighteen months of self-indulgent purgatory. Eighteen months of a silent, cold apartment and a meaningless, empty existence. Eighteen months of missing him and hoping that he was doing better than I was. Eighteen months of my stupid, dogged determination that I knew what was better for Shuichi than he did.

I opened my eyes to see Nakano’s fiery, angry eyes, only inches from my own. “You were always the one he loved, you selfish ass. You’re just too narcissistic to see beyond your own pain.”

He was right. Shuichi… I broke him. It was me. I was responsible for all of it. “I came back because I owed it to him. He saved me…”

“Is that why you tried to rape him? Because he saved you? Because you owed it to him?” Hiro snarled angrily as Inoue struggled to restrain him.

“No, I… wanted to help him,” I was to be unable to stop the words as they tumbled out of me and I felt the tears prick at the corners of my eyes, but I’d be damned if I’d cry in front of these bastards.

“Help him? You tried to run him down with your car and then you tried to rape him! What the hell is wrong with you?” Nakano panted with his fury and his exertions to get loose from Inoue. “He was better off without you. Even the drinking and drugs and disappearing for days on end was better than what you’ve done to him!”

He was right. Nakano had seen what I had done to Shuichi first hand, and he was right, Shuichi had been better off without me. I should have stayed in New York. If I had, then maybe Shuichi would have had a chance at happiness with someone else.

Nakano was right, damn it! Anything that my two captors did to me now was fine with me. It didn’t matter anymore. What could they possibly do to me that could equal what I had done to Shuichi?

“Yuki-san, I want us to be very clear on this,” Inoue said threateningly as he pushed Nakano behind him. “You need to stop hurting Shuichi. If you hurt him again, I will hurt you back,” he gave me a humorless smile and his eyes flickered with cruel sincerity. “And it won’t be with you helpless and tied-up. It will be one on one. I’ll kick your sorry, pathetic, self-absorbed ass into next week. And I’ll fucking revel in it.”

“Kyosuke, I think that’s enough.” Nakano said softly, soothingly almost, but his eyes contained serious worry as he studied the other man. He reached out and squeeze Inoue’s arm, “That’s enough now.”

For some reason, Nakano’s sudden concern and Inoue’s complete change in demeanor made me a little bit anxious.

Inoue leaned forward until he was right next to my ear, I could feel his warm breath on my sensitive ear and my traitorous body shivered. I could smell his incense-like scent of cherry smokiness. “You know,” he said very softly as his fingers slid into my hair and tightened painfully, holding my head still and tipped to one side, “I don’t hate you, Yuki-san. In fact, if it was another time and place, well…” And then, his tongue darted out and he licked the stretch of skin from my collarbone to my ear.

“Ack!” I shouted as I struggled to get away from his tongue of violation.

He laughed as he stepped back from me, his countenance restored to the irritatingly smug Inoue, “You never fail to amuse me, you are so easy to tease. And you get so angry! I find that absolutely adorable, Yuki-san.”

I glared at him as I decided that I really, really despised him.

“I suspect, Yuki-san,” he said with that mocking smirk, “that you and I will be around each other for a long time to come.” His smirk vanished and he said very quietly and seriously, “In fact, we must figure out how to get along with one another--for Shuichi’s sake. You of all people must see it, Yuki-san, how close he is to breaking entirely apart. Be strong for him, Yuki-san. He won’t let anyone else do that for him now except for you. Treat him right, because, in spite of his multitude of mistakes, he deserves to be loved.”

Yes, I despised Inoue. I loathed him. But I could not ignore the fact that he was correct in his assessment of Shuichi’s mental state. Also, I could not deny the fact that both Inoue and Nakano did love Shuichi. They had both proven their love, far better than I ever had. It was a bitter pill for me to swallow, but it was reality.

“Tony!” Inoue called out and a gigantic man appeared. “Take our “guest” to my flat. Deliver him to Shindou-san and make sure to speak Japanese when you do so. Shindou-san will know what to do with him.”


The next time my eyes opened, I was lying in an unfamiliar bed with a warm body next to me. I let my eyes adjust to the light in the room and I wondered if I had dreamed that whole thing with Inoue and Nakano. I flexed my hands, and the pain from my wrists made me moan. No, it hadn’t been a dream.

My mind was surprisingly sharp and clear as I put it to work. What had happened after Inoue and Nakano?

There was a gigantic man that hefted me like I was a toy and then a soft, recognizable voice that made me feel safe and warm. Maybe that had been the dream?

I inhaled deeply, the familiar, comforting clean scent of strawberries and spice. I rolled onto my side and looked at the sleeping body next to me. I touched the pink, purple, and blond tousled hair; it was still damp from a recent shower. His eyes were closed, but I saw the wet tear tracks that led from his eyes to his cheeks. His hands were curled in front of him like an innocent child. It was really Shuichi! I buried my nose in his hair and inhaled again.

“Shuichi,” I said, my own tears forming in my eyes. I placed my arms around him and pulled him close, feeling his warm breath on my neck. I rubbed his back gently, enjoying the feel of his body pressed against mine. It had been so long since I had held him.

“Eiri?” he said quietly, concern in his voice, “Are you okay?”

I smiled, “Yes. I am now.”

He snuggled into me, “Good. I was so worried about you.” His nose nuzzled at my neck and he inhaled deeply, “I missed your smell. I missed you.”

I sighed in contentment as I felt his hands begin to unbutton my shirt.

“What are you doing, brat?” I said feigning irritation as my cock woke with a sudden start. I could not help but notice that he was already naked and aroused. I also noticed that he was painfully thin. His ribs and hipbones were easily discernable, much more evident than the last time I had seen him. I hoped I would remember to ask him about that later.

“I need to see if you are hurt anywhere else,” he said as he sat up.

“Uh huh,” I said with a slight smirk.

He paused at a button and placed his hand flat against me and looked into my eyes, searching for something. “Why did you take so long to come to London?”

When I chuckled at him he began to work on the buttons again. I felt that it was important that I let him lead this charge after our last, disastrous encounter. I didn’t want to do anything to raise those horrible demons. “You know, you could have returned to Tokyo to see me.”

“I wasn’t sure you wanted to see me,” he said as he nudged me gently.

Taking the hint, I sat up so that he could strip my shirt off completely. Once I was sitting and my shirt was removed, he slid around so that his legs were on either side of my hips and inspected my back. His deft fingers stroked my skin with light, delicate touches from my shoulders to the waistband of my increasingly uncomfortable pants. Satisfied that there were no hidden wounds on me, his fingers became bolder and his touch increased to a light massage. Those sore and aching shoulders of mine were soothed by his tender caresses. I gave an involuntary moan as his ministration found a particularly painful spot that he worked to loosen.

I was already beginning to relax. He moved again and, this time, he pressed his hand insistently against my chest, giving me the signal to lie down again. I was completely compliant as I stretched out. I watched as his hands traveled to my pants. Once he had skillfully opened my fly, he gave me another soft nudge and I raised my hips, still watching as he carefully removed my slacks and boxers. Then he again started at my toes, working his way up my legs, back to giving me feather-like touches and occasionally running his tongue over me, back to searching my body for any injury.

As he continued his thorough examination, he gently pushed my thighs apart so that he could view even the most intimate parts of me. His fingers and tongue continued their light touches, making me moan and sigh with his tender and insistent caresses. He totally ignored my raging hard on.

I knew that he was primarily looking for damage on me. All he found was the split lip and the sore, bandaged wrists. I could see him visibly relax when he finished his clinical tour of my now very aroused body.

“You’re… okay?” he asked yet again as he sat up. This time his eyes delved into mine, and I knew that he was asking about my mental state.

“Yes, brat, I’m fine. A little pissed off, understandably, but other than that, I’m fine.” I met his sad, concerned stare. “I’m also a little turned on, if you haven’t noticed.”

His serious look faded and he gave me a coquettish smile, “Oh, I noticed. I just didn’t know if you wanted to...”

I raised my hand and touched his beautiful face, trying to smooth away the anguish that was etched in it from worry and anger, “When have I not wanted to with you?”

“Eiri,” he said as his eyes clouded and filled with tears, “I… I…”

“Shuichi,” I let my fingers follow the line of his jaw to his neck and down to his collarbone, “do you want me?”

He nodded, and said throatily with emotion, “Yes. You are all I ever want. I’ve told you before that just the sound of your voice can almost make me come.”

Those words always did something to me. Besides melting my heart, they dug down deep into me, sparking the inferno of desire I had for Shuichi and bringing it roaring to the surface. I stared at him as I continue to let my fingers touch him, working their way towards that scrumptious nipple ring. It was all I could do to keep myself still, to keep myself from losing control. This dance needed to be set to Shuichi’s pace, not mine.

“Eiri?” he was still watching me intently as I touched that piece of sinful jewelry with a gentle caress.

“Yes?”

He leaned over and kissed me. I felt his own bonfire of longing burst into life as his tongue brushed against mine and he groaned with lust. Moving his body over mine, I felt his erection as it pressed into my hip. I wanted him. I needed him.

As I took the liberty to deepen the kiss, I also allowed my hands to touch him, gently gliding over his shoulders, his back and down to his lovely ass. I let my fingers press into his flesh, pushing his hips so that I could feel his hard cock grind into me. I moaned. I wanted him, yes, but more importantly, I needed him to trust me again.

“Shuichi…” I panted as I broke the kiss and ran my fingers over his cheek, “do you want to have me?”

His eyes, already dilated and murky with passion, widened visibly and a blush pinked his cheeks as he considered my offer. “Hmm, well… no, not tonight. But I will take you up on that at a later date. Tonight I want you inside me. I want to be filled with you.”

I groaned. He was still shy when he spoke about sex, how did he manage to make such seemingly innocent words into such sensuous phrases?

He sat up and reached over into the nightstand drawer, pulling out a bottle of lubricant, he placed it in my hands. Smiling at me, he lay down as he said, “I’m all yours, Eiri.”

“Are you sure?” I could feel tears gather in my eyes again as he nodded. I didn’t deserve him. How could he still love me after everything I had put him through?

As if he understood my hesitation, I felt Shuichi’s fingers as they slid into and tugged gently at my hair, pulling my head down so that my face was only an inch or so from his, “Come on, Eiri. You’ve made me wait long enough.”

Not able to hold myself in check any longer, I kissed him, hard and passionately. My initial fear was negated as I felt him react with the same fevered desire I had. His pared nails dug sharply into my back, pulling me closer and with abandon. And I finally allowed myself to do what I had come to London to do; I listened to what Shuichi’s body was telling me.

Take me. Fill me. Love me.

My lips moved to his ear and I whispered his name softly and was satisfied when I received a whimper in return. I nuzzled his neck, nipping and licking but trying to refrain from my usual rough biting. His hands threaded themselves through my hair as his breathing quickened, “Eiri…”

I let my hands slide down and grip his sides, just under his arms as I repositioned my body so that my mouth could continue its downward journey. He squirmed, but only a little, when my teeth closed on his unadorned nipple and I licked the trapped nub. I could feel his body begin to shake with want as I continued to tease his hardened nipple. His body cried out to me.

I want you. More. More. More.

My mouth moved to the ring and I lifted it with my tongue and tugged at it with my teeth. And this time, he cried out with his voice, “Yes, Eiri…”

I took my time as I moved lower, caressing him with my hands and tongue, inspecting his body very much like he did to me earlier. He writhed beneath me, lifting his hips wantonly, needing me to touch his aching, weeping erection. Instead of giving him what he wanted, I stroked those sexy hipbones with my fingers and swirled my tongue around and into his navel.

He moaned as I slid my mouth to the top of his thigh.

My hand snaked under his knee and raised it, giving me greater access to the inside of his thigh, a particularly sensitive area for Shuichi. I latched onto the skin, close to the apex of his thighs and sucked, marking him.

He groaned loudly, but his body was screaming.

Take me. Claim me. Make me yours.

Once more, I moved my mouth, licking at his sac and enclosing my mouth over his balls. First one, then the other, sucking gently, but insistently. I was rewarded with a high-pitched wail from his talented throat. His scent was heavenly, clean and musky, fresh and hot. I inhaled deeply again and again, rubbing my nose gently through his course, dark pubic hair. I licked at his balls again, slowly and tenderly. His moan was enticing. I slipped my hand around his erection, lifting it with tenderness, giving me better access as I brought my head closer. I caressed him softly and repeatedly with my cheek, like a cat rubbing against his owner.

My cheek was still creating a gentle friction against his cock, but now I let my tongue join and lap teasingly at his length, tasting the hard, quivering flesh. I wet him briefly and then rubbed my bottom lip gently along the same moist path traveled by my tongue, interspersed with sweet, languid kisses. My hands were also busy, stroking and fondling the flesh where my mouth and lips could not. Sometimes I bit at him lightly, only to lave at the nips with my tongue and lips, moving with deliberate, unerring care, closer and closer, lick by lick, to the swollen, flared head. Once there, I ran my tongue along the sensitive ridge, slowly and gently, and then I began the entire process again.

Time stopped for me then as I licked, caressed, and kissed him. I loved Shuichi. With each lap from my tongue, every rub from my cheek, loving him was what I wanted to convey. I crawled up his body, giving myself better access to his cock, wrapping my mouth around the base and lavishing him with my tongue as my mouth watered for more. Again and again, licking, kissing, stroking and loving him.

I could hear his cries, but it was as if they were far away and totally removed from me; it was as if those cries were somehow unrelated to my current actions of loving him. Because I was so preoccupied with him, I could ignore his pleading whining with ease until he, finally reaching his limit, snagged me by my hair and wrenched my head up. I was so intent with my task that I was temporarily confused by the interruption. I struggled against the pull of being separated from my prize, attempting to resume my devotion as the salvia dripped from my panting tongue and onto his flushed skin.

“Eiri, stop!” he finally shouted, his hands still knotted in my hair.

I looked into his fully dilated eyes; my own eyes were blurry with my single-minded intention. I swallowed the excess salvia and said, with fevered delirium, “Why?”

His breathing was ragged, “Because I can’t take anymore!”

“Sure you can,” I said dreamily as I moved my head back down and my tongue licked at the tip of his penis. This time, I slid the head into my mouth and sucked gently at it as my tongue circled his slit and my salivary glands began working overtime once again.

He sighed and said, hoarsely, “Eiri… this is amazing.”

While my mouth was busy, my hands located the bottle of lubricant and quickly opened it. The scent of strawberries wafted from the container and stopped what I was doing to sit up and give my disheveled lover a questioning look.

He gave me that heart-stopping, flirtatious smile as he explained breathlessly, “Miki took me to this shop she knows… ” He pushed his hands under the pillow and stretched, arching his back seductively, but keeping his knees stationary and pointed at the ceiling, “Do you like it? Its strawberry flavored and edible, just like me.”

I couldn’t take my eyes off his amazing display. I finally answered, my voice gruff with lust, “I would like to test that declaration.”

Lubricant applied to my index finger, and I sat back and watched as I touched him, running my finger down the ultra-sensitive strip of flesh and to the small puckered entrance teasing and coating it. I leaned down moving my hands so that they cupped his sweet ass and spread him apart. At the same time I lowered my head and as my mouth watered with saliva again, I let my tongue slide against his flesh, running it the length of his crevice to just below his sac, slowly savoring every inch of him. I lifted my tongue and began again. Again I lapped at him, tasting him. And again.

This time, I couldn’t ignore his loud and perfectly pitched wail, vocal and non-vocal alike.

Love me. Take me. Love me.

I brought my tongue to a pause at his tight little hole and dipped the tip in. Strawberry flavored he was, and I let my tongue slide deeper into him as he panted and clutched at the sheets. So good, him being open and vulnerable to me, trusting me. And my surrender to him, giving him everything I could, trying to prove my adoration. As I rimmed him, I reached for the lubricant again, uncapping it and smearing all my fingers. As much as I loved fucking him with my tongue, I knew he was ready to be caressed deeper inside, farther than even that slick muscle could reach.

Removing my tongue, I watched closely as I slid my middle finger in first and Shuichi shuddered and sighed in pleasure. Leaning over, I let my tongue again lap at the salty and somewhat sweet juice that dripped from his swollen penis.

He responded with an appreciative, throaty, “Yes, Eiri. Yes!”

My index finger joined my middle finger and he moaned and pushed his hips slightly upward, asking me for more. I let my mouth close over his erection and swallowed him down, and then up again, sliding my tongue around his shaft as I pleasured him.

I belong to you.

My ring finger slid into him and I twisted my sore, yet serviceable wrist as I searched for and found his prostate. His body bucked from the double assault of fingers and mouth and he came with a sudden start, surprising both of us with the speed and absolute intensity of his orgasm. I had to work hard to swallow all of his essence without spilling any as he shuddered with his climax.

I pulled my fingers from him gently and as I searched for the lubricant again I studied his sated, relaxed face. He was so beautiful. I felt my breath catch as I looked at him. Finding the lube, I hastily uncapped it one more time and applied a generous amount to my very anxious cock. I did not dally with touching myself, as I was dangerously close to coming. I was overwhelmed with the sudden fiery desire to be buried inside him.

Scooping up his left thigh with my right arm, I leaned forward and placed my erection at his entrance. I was at my limit as I pushed into him. I wanted to be gentle, but I wasn’t as I lost control temporarily and slammed my full length into him, groaning with the unbelievably wonderful feeling.

When my cock was completely encased in his tight tunnel, I had to force myself to pause, allowing both of us a moment. Time for Shuichi to get use to me inside him, time for my body to regain some control, and time to listen to what his body had to say.

I love you.

Emotion and desire collided and fused together to become one inside me. It was overwhelming, euphoria and devotion mixing together to form that strange, intangible feeling that only Shuichi had the ability to bring to me.

Love.

I love you; his body told me over and over.

And my body answered as it always did, the way my mind and my mouth couldn’t; and I love you, too.

Looking him in the eyes, I saw the unshed tears there, taking in the knowledge of my love with his emotional silence, afraid of saying anything to me that would shatter the moment. I didn’t want him to fear anymore.

“Shuichi…” I gasped, “I…”

Placing a finger gently on my lips, he smiled, “I know, Eiri.”

Instead of trying to clumsily articulate anything else, I kissed him and I rocked my hips slowly, backing out of him and returning at a languid pace. It was wonderfully, sinfully, sensual and, as I moved, I became acutely aware. All of my senses were reverberating with Shuichi.

Love me love you love me love you

We resonated with each other as I twisted my hips and touched that wicked spot that made him cry out and tighten around me. I clutched his ankle resting in the crook of my arm, and raised it to my shoulder, licking and kissing his calf in the process. He moaned his approval, his cock hard and wet again as he writhed beneath me like a wild thing caught in a trap.

A beautiful wild thing.

My left arm slid under his right leg and I moved closer to his body, driving my erection deeper into him. He groaned with the added depth.

I watched him as his eyes closed in bliss as I positioned myself to rub against his prostate again and again. “Shuichi,” I whispered, “touch yourself. I want to watch you come.”

He obeyed immediately running his hand between us and wrapping it around the length of his shaft as he began stroking himself. So hot. His left hand moved to that nipple ring and tugged, the sight of that almost did it for me. But I stubbornly held out, wanting to see him in ecstasy.

I continued my slow strokes, refusing my body’s urgent cry to go faster, to pound into him without mercy. I waited and made love to him with tender but unfaltering thrusts. It was almost ethereal, as I reached an endorphin high that felt as if I could fuck him forever. In – twist up, out – roll down, over and over, forever and ever I could…

Shuichi arched against me and cried out as he splattered both of us with delicate, gossamer strings of warm cum and, at the same time, tightened his passage around me and I… well, so much for doing this forever. My wonderful control shattered and I did pound into him with those last mind-blowing strokes as I finally spent myself inside him.

And then, as I lay on top of him, trying to soothe my ragged breathing I listened one last time to what he was saying to me without words.

I love you.

I’m sorry.

Sorry? What the hell was that all about? What did he have to be sorry for? My post-coital mind fought frantically to clear the fog and think.

Think, damn it.

I leaned back enough so that I could look into his eyes, they were closed and he looked satisfied. I brushed at his sweat-soaked hair, “Shuichi?”

“Hmm?” he opened his eyes slowly and there it was, his sorrow. How had I missed it before?

I rolled off of him and to my side as I propped my head up on my hand. “Shuichi, what did I say to you earlier?”

He smiled sadly, “Not much, really. Just the truth. I’m sorry about Hiro and Kyo, honestly, Eiri,” he sighed heavily, “I can’t imagine what those two were thinking.”

“You. They were thinking about you. They were doing the job I should have been doing.”

He rolled his eyes, “You said that earlier. That’s so ridiculous. No one has to have the “job” of looking out for me. I’m a big boy.”

I said that earlier? This was part of his sorrow, but not the heart of it. There was definitely more to come.

“Maybe,” I said, “but that doesn’t mean that there aren’t people who want to keep you safe.”

He snorted as he rolled onto his side to face me, “Safe? This is the same Kyo that threw me on the floor just a couple of weeks ago and almost dislocated my shoulder.”

“Why did he do that?” I stroked his hair again as I continued to concentrate on reading him. There was so much pain.

“I tried…” Shuichi’s eyes broke contact with mine, “I tried to hit him.”

“Really?” Well, that certainly didn’t hurt my feelings. “Why?”

“Because of that stupid picture,” he said very, very softly.

“Oh,” my hand dropped to the bed.

“I’m so sorry about that, Eiri,” he bent his head down so that his hair obscured his eyes. “I really am sorry.”

“Yeah, we’ve already had this discussion. Let’s drop it for now, okay? I really don’t want to talk about Inoue any more.” My memory flared to life, “He is sleeping with Nakano, isn’t he?”

“Yeah, you asked me that earlier, too. Something about the two of them getting freaky.”

I shook my head, trying to erase the disgusting memory of Inoue lapping my neck, “Yeah. Like I said, I don’t want to talk about Inoue anymore.” I guess if the sneaky bastard could do that to me, how easy was it for him to trick an idiot like Shuichi into some tabloid picture? And best not to forget that Inoue was related to the master manipulator, Seguchi Tohma.

“Shuichi,” I wouldn’t run from the pain anymore, “did I tell you about Yokohama, earlier?”

He nodded and the pain was clearly etched on his face. “Yeah. You don’t remember?”

“No,” I said.

Shit. This was not the way he was supposed to find out about that. Fucking Inoue and Nakano. I sighed internally, how would they have known about it? How would they have known that what they did to me would in turn cause me to drop a bomb on Shuichi that could… that might make him lose it.

“I didn’t want you to find out that way.” I said, trying to keep my anger towards Inoue and Nakano in check.

He shrugged, “It doesn’t matter, does it? Not really. It’s only two years, after all.” His voice cracked and he smiled again, but the tears began sliding down his cheeks as the floodgates to his pain opened. “Two years of… Eiri, you don’t know how I felt, what it did to me. When I saw you… but it wasn’t you, it wasn’t you, and that…”

“I know it hurt you,” I wrapped my arms around him and he stiffened.

“You don’t know anything, okay! So don’t patronize me, Eiri. I was wrong, okay? I’m responsible for all of it.”

“I had a quite a bit to do with it as well,” I said quietly as I prepared for the emotional deluge that was about to hit us both. “If you recall, I wasn’t exactly receptive to your obvious distress.”

“Yeah, but that’s how you always are. That’s who and what you are,” he said sharply as if that somehow absolved me from being a cold, unfeeling bastard. “I knew that from the start.”

“But that doesn’t make it right,” I grumbled back to him. “That doesn’t make me any less responsible for hurting you.”

“Can we talk about this tomorrow? I’m really not up for it right now,” he answered softly as he rubbed the tears from his eyes.

I stared at him, “Will you be here in the morning?”

He gave me a startled look. I knew it. I knew that he was thinking about throwing in the towel and running away. And why wouldn’t I know it? I was the one who taught him that.

“Please, Shuichi,” I hated begging him, but I didn’t know what else to do. “Stay with me.”

He nodded once and allowed me to hold him close. But just before I drifted away I did hear him whisper, “For tonight.”


TBC


Lyrics for Tenderness written by General Public