What a Drag

Eyes watched as the tall Amazon walked through the crowded streets. “I’m just making sure that’s he okay” Shampoo told herself, not wanting to admit that she’d been stalking him since he’d left the Neko Hanten. He looked good, he wore western clothes today, black jeans and a green long sleeved t-shirt that allowed his sculpted torso to show. Sunglasses protected his eyes from the bright sunlight. He drew many an admiring glance from girls as he strode purposely on his way, not that he noticed their interest. He carried a shopping basket which was full of fresh vegetables, meat and a couple of house plants. She remembered how they used to shop together every Saturday as he was now; Mousse had a knack for finding the freshest vegetable and bargaining for prices. She found him a nuisance at the time, now she missed those days. Here she was following him around in disguise. She wore a chin length black wig over her own luxurious purple hair, sunglasses and a tan overcoat.

Mousse couldn’t get over the feeling that he was being watched ‘I’m being paranoid’ he thought and glanced around, no one seemed to be paying the slightest attention to him. Which was good because he felt uncomfortable wearing the western style clothes that Konatsu had insisted he try in an effort to get himself used to being sexy. He felt anything but, although the jeans were relaxed fit, he felt that they hugged his rear too provocatively and exposed his ‘goodies’ in front too much. The shirt was so tight that he felt he might as well not being wearing one. He was happy when he arrived at the clinic and let himself into his apartment, ‘home’ he thought fondly. He’d personalized the space to suit his own tastes. The love seat had coloured Chinese brocade pillows added to it. A coffee table had been purchased at a thrifty shop that was painted a dark grey and had a creamy marble top. The walls were hung with prints that he had found at the same shop. He had house plants lined up on the window sills, except for in the kitchen where he’d gotten Dr. Tofu’s permission to install a window box to grow his favourite herbs in.

In his bedroom he had put the quilt that his mother had made for him. She had made it about his life; there was a square from the baby blanket that he used to carry around with him. There were squares from clothes that he’d outgrown. His favourite one was taken from his Hidden Weapons novice robe (red with a white cloth belt) and finally his mother had managed to get a hold of an old robe of Shampoo’s and sew it to all the rest. Mousse had opened that one and tucked a few hairs that he’d gotten from her hairbrush inside and resewed it. Over his bed, he had a framed poster of a falcon in flight. He’d always identified with birds and to him this poster represented freedom, his own. He missed Shampoo horribly but knew that it was for the best. He liked his new life; he was good at his job and got along well with his employer. He had thought that he would be bored being an assistant, but he enjoyed working with Dr. Tofu and was learning a lot about the human body.

He looked out the window, still feeling that he was being watched, he could have sworn that he saw a dark haired woman that he’d seen before ducking out of sight. Then he laughed at his paranoia, as if anyone would be stalking him he mused as he pulled out the ingredients to make dinner with. They were having practice at his place, so he was making supper for the ‘girls’

“The Can Can” Konatsu proclaimed “that’s the dance that’s going to get you the crown”

Mousse looked dubious at this “hasn’t that been done to death?” he asked.

“It’s a classic, besides the real can can is going to look tame by the time I’m through with you” Konatsu said. “We’re going to sex it up a lot and really show them why they call her Raunchy Ranko” he said nodding to Ranma.

“It could work, there’s nothing like girls in matching costumes moving in perfect sync” Ranma observed. None of the boys were in costume that night (expect for Konatsu who normally wore girl’s clothes) but all of them wore stilettos. Konatsu had taken over making dinner while Mousse and Ranma were practicing.

“Why spaghetti? I was expecting Chinese food” Konatsu asked.

“I got a little sick of Chinese while working at the Neko Hanten” Mousse explained and swung Ranma around and dipped her.

“Very good, now Ranma hook your leg around him and let him lift you” Konatsu said.

“Do I have to? That always gets him excited” Ranma said distastefully.

“Not my fault you actually become a real girl. A real short one at that” said.

“I’m not that short” Ranma protested.

“You’re even smaller than Akane, you don’t even come up to my collarbone” Mousse joked.

“Not everyone was born an Amazon” she said hotly.

“Nope, some people are runty girls” Mousse joked. “So which one of you are going to carry your children, you or Akane?”

“Well obviously Akane, I would have to be male to make babies” Ranma said.

“I don’t know, perhaps you could make the deposit while male and than Akane could use a turkey baster to impregnate your female self?” Mousse suggested.

That got Konatsu’s attention “What a concept, could you really be both mother and father to your own child?”

Ranma looked sick at the idea “you people are perverts!” she snapped. Than there was a knock at the door and they went to answer it.

Shampoo was wondering what at the hell was happening in Mousse’s apartment, she was still convinced that he had a secret girlfriend and was watching his place through a high power telescope that she used to use to spy on Ranma. She’d watched while two girls were admitted to his apartment, but couldn’t make out who they were because his blinds were mostly closed. She could see figures dancing and didn’t know what to make of that. Her jaw dropped when a tall blonde knocked at the door and was admitted.

“Hi Dr. To-Mistress Demonica Mousse said admiring what a pretty woman she made. She wore a teased blonde wig, a tight leather studded corset, a zip up leather mini skirt and her long legs were encased in fish net stockings and knee high boots with killer stilettos. Her make up was dramatic and her bullwhip was coiled on her right hip.

“Hello everyone, I’m heading out to the Masquerade tonight, but can stay for dinner” Dr. Tofu said and joined their little party.

Shampoo was incensed, ‘three girls?’ she questioned. Mousse had never even looked at another girl with he lived with her at the Neko Hanten and now he was having orgies! She sighed and started walking home; she wondered why she couldn’t get Mousse out of her head. So many years spent tripping over him, only to follow him when he was gone. She had given up on Ranma, it was like someone had ripped the blinders from her eyes and she was seeing clearer than she had in over a year. Ranma didn’t love her; he barely even liked her and hated her glomping onto him. She had thought that she was being so sexy doing this, when all it did was annoyed him. It was Akane that he liked and she hadn’t even realized this even when they were always together and she was the one who he rescued, not Shampoo. So she had started leaving him alone even when he came in for Ramen, now she was polite to him and not pushy. It was Mousse that she couldn’t stop thinking about, she missed him. Why hadn’t she realized that she would? She’d always had a bit of a soft spot for him. She sighed and continued home unaware that Mousse’s orgy consisted of only one real girl, and she was far too busy pigging out on spaghetti to think about sex.

Mousse was surprised when he got a phone call from Mimi “Hi Mousse, my niece is in town and I was wondering if you would mind spending some time with her? She doesn’t really know anyone here” he said.

“I don’t know if I’m the man for the job” Mousse said dubiously.

“You’re a nice boy and will treat Hortense well” he predicted.

“Hortense?” Mousse asked.

“Old family name, she was named after her great-grandmother” Mimi explained.

“What’s she like?” he asked.

“She got a really nice personality” Mimi joked. “She’s a pretty girl a bit older than you, she speaks passable Japanese and only wants to have a good time with a boy of her age. Her old Uncle bores her to death, just say that you’ll take her to a movie and I’ll spring for the entire date” he said persuasive.

Mousse pondered this; he’d never been on a real date before and wondered if he could use it from practice. His only experience going out with a woman consisted of going shopping with Shampoo where he’d spend all of his money on gifts for her that she never wore. It had hurt him that she snubbed his innocent presents, they were bought just to show her how special she was to him and not intended as a bribe. This strengthened his resolve, he had to start dating sometime and meeting other women. “Okay I’ll do it?” he said decisively.

Mousse was nervous and shaved for the second time that day, washed his face, combed his hair, brushed his teeth and pulled open his closet to see what he should wear that night. He had to smile at the sparkly dresses hung beside his own white robes. He opened his dresser and looked at the western clothes there, wondering if he should resort to wearing those. He’d gotten quite the number of compliments since altering his mode of dress; finally he settled for a set of clothes that Ranma had talked him into buying. They were still Chinese and more the style that Ranma preferred to wear, but fit Mousse well. It was a plain black sleeveless shirt with a red stripe across one side, with black cording around the shoulders and baggy pants. The tight shirt showed off his impressive, lithe torso and exposed his powerful arms; he wore his regular baggie pants underneath.

Hortense was twenty; he had no idea why she would want to go out with someone that probably seemed like a kid to her. He hoped she wasn’t too disappointed when he showed up. He knocked on the door of Mimi/Stan’s house. He froze when the door was opened by a demurely dressed version of an America actress that he ‘admired’ late at night alone in his room, Megan Fox only Hortense had red hair.

Hortense couldn’t believe her luck at the hunk that her boring Uncle had managed to scare up for her. She loved to party and loved to have sex; something she didn’t normally get to do in Japan where she was watched like a hawk. “Hello you must be Mousse” she purred.

Mousse blushed at the way she was looking at him, she looked......hungry. He quickly dismissed it, perhaps she simply was.

“Hello Mousse”, Stan said he was relieved that his nieces as going out with the shy virgin, he’d heard stories about her reputation and was determined that he keep her out of trouble while she was on his watch.

“Goodnight Uncle Stan” she said over her shoulder as she dragged Mousse off.

“Do you want to go see a movie?” Mousse asked.

“Do you have a place of your own?” she demanded.

“I have an apartment close by” he said cautiously, not appreciating how demanding a virtual stranger was being.

“Good lets go there” she said.

“Well there was a movie on TV that I wouldn’t mind watching” Mousse said reluctantly.

She could only roll her eyes, ‘was this guy for real?’ she questioned.

“I thought that we’d do something more fun than that” she said with a wolfish grin, she sighed when he just gave her a confused look. As soon as they entered his apartment, she borrowed his washroom and changed into the outfit that she’d brought. Mousse’s jaw dropped when she emerged wearing a red crop top that exposed her taut belly and an ultra low rise black mini-skirt.

“That’s better” she said with satisfaction as Mousse’s eye bugged out of his head. Swaying her hips, she joined him on the loveseat and draped her legs over his, allowing her black lace panties to show. Mousse gulped at this. She moved her foot so that it rested on his crotch and rubbed it suggestively.

Mousse realized what was happening and quickly stood up with his face flaming, “would you like some cocoa?” he squeaked nervously. He’d never been propositioned like this and didn’t know how to react.

She snorted “I think that it’s pretty obvious what I want, I want to screw you” she said. Mousse regarded her; he could rid himself of his virginity tonight he realized. He imagined pounding his frustrations into her beautiful body, and then he realized that he couldn’t. By doing this, he would be no better off then in his village and being prey to any warrior who compelled him. He realized that his virginity was sacred to him and only to be bestowed to a woman he loved, not to be ordered from him. It was then that he had his epiphany, that he was no worse or better than anyone and was a person who should be valued and respected. He didn’t want to sleep with this person; he didn’t even like her.

Meanwhile

Ranma and Konatsu had gotten together to share some take out and discuss costuming.

“Where’s Mousse tonight?” Konatsu asked.

“He’s taking Mimi’s niece out. Mimi asked him to. She’s got a funny name, Harriet or something like that” Ranma said dismissively. He glanced up curiously when he heard Konatsu’s chopsticks clatter to the table.

“Is her name Hortense?” he asked.

“Yes that’s it” Ranma said.

“Mousse’s going out with Horny Hortense? We have to go rescue him right now” Konatsu said urgently.

“Why should we?” Ranma asked curiously.

“She’s a nympho who will eat him alive. There’s no way that stick-in-the-mud could handle her” Konatsu said.

“I’m sure that he’ll turn her down if he feels uncomfortable” Ranma said.

“No one turns Horny Hortense down, I certainly didn’t the last time she was here” Konatsu said and both of them sped towards Mousse’s apartment.

*****

“That’s not going to happen” Mousse said firmly. “I’m taking you back to your uncle’s place”

“Do you know who I am and what I’m offering you? What are you some sort of fag?” she demanded in outrage.

“You’re another woman who thinks she can tell me what to do. I’ve had enough of that in the past, not interested” he proclaimed and felt good about himself for defying women unlike his upbringing had dictated.

“You son of a bitch! Who the hell do you think you are?” she cried.

“I think I’m Mu Tzu and I refuse to take crap from women anymore” he said. Than there was a knock at the door, he answered it. Konatsu and Ranma strode in.

“Konatsu!” Hortense cried happily and ran into his arms.

“Good to see you again baby. Ready to come home with me so I can rock your world? Mousse Woussey here just got out of a bad relationship and isn’t ready for a woman like you” Konatsu said.

“Oh is that why you turned me down?” Hortense said comprehension dawning. “Sorry I thought you were gay” she apologized.

Konatsu looked at him sharply “you turned Hortense down? No one does that!’ he said startled.

“You’re beautiful, but you’re not the girl for me” Mousse said to her.

“It’s okay, you’re handsome too but I like Konatsu better” she said and led the cross dressing artist out the door.

“See? girls love cross dressers” he said before he departed. “If I don’t make rehearsal tomorrow, don’t come looking for me” he instructed them.

“I can’t wait to get laid” Ranma said looking after them.

Mousse glanced after the amorous couple and said “I know that I can” he said with triumph.