Adult-FanFiction.org : Anime

Moon and Stars	By : Monddame Category: Sailor Moon > General Views: 5134 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon in any way shape or form. I am not given money or any other compensation (not even hugs) for my writing. All I get is the satisfaction of knowing that it's out there somewhere for others to read.

Chapter List
- 7
- 8
- 9
Usagi�s parents were glad to see her, and Shingo was unusually civil to his older sister. Her little brother wasn�t so little anymore. At nearly sixteen, Shingo was now as tall as Usagi. He even exchanged a few worried glances with his parents at the dinner table. She didn�t mind them nearly as much as she minded similar looks from her friends. After dinner, Usagi resigned herself to dealing with the emotional cesspool of her room, and Shingo trooped up the stairs after her.

�Hey, Usagi?�

�Yeah?�

�I�m glad you�re here. It�s been weird not having you around.� He fidgeted, looking at his feet.

�I�m glad I�m here too. Sorry I haven�t visited more often.�

�It�s okay. I know you�ve been�busy.� He didn�t want to hurt his sister by telling her how much their parents had worried about her after she�d moved out, how much he�d worried about her, but Usagi knew anyway.

�Yeah, I�m sorry about that too.� It was her turn to look at her feet. She looked up in surprise as she felt his gangly arm twine around her.

�It�s okay sis. I just hope things are getting better. And you know�um�if you need anything�anyone to talk to�� He dropped his arm, shifting nervously. �I know we haven�t gotten along so well in the past, but�you�re my sister. I love you Usagi and I want you to be happy again.�

The last sentence was a low mumble, and Shingo immediately shuffled off into his own room without looking at her. But she had heard it, and stood in the doorway to her bedroom in shock. Her brother had never said that he loved her, not ever. Unbidden, tears formed in her eyes, and for the first time in a long time they weren�t tears of abject pain. Shingo�s concern, his love, something so unexpected, shone the love of her parents and her friends in a new light, made their worries fresh in her eyes.

She really had been incredibly selfish. Her pain had swallowed her and cast a dark cloud on everyone in her life. By indulging in her suffering she had caused pain to all the people she loved. Fueled by this new awareness, her resolution to be happy or at least to not be miserable grew to a new fervor, and in this new sense of purpose, Usagi found a measure of satisfaction. This new goal would be her sustaining force from now on, and she would no longer simply survive. She would live. If she couldn�t do it for herself, and the past few years clearly indicated that she could not, she could do it for them: for the people who loved her.

But there was something she had to do first; something that had the potential to dissolve her untested resolve before it began to do her any good at all. She had to say goodbye to Mamo-chan.

Usagi took a deep breath and entered her childhood room. Her mother hadn�t changed anything in her absence and the pinks and bunnies still filled the room. Though the room itself made her a little bit melancholy with its nostalgia, it was bearable. Slowly, her hands beginning to tremble, she made her way to the closet. Usagi pulled out the large box that she and Minako had packed all of her memories into. Settling onto the floor beside the box, she lifted off the lid and began.

One by one she pulled out her mementos of her life with Mamo-chan. Each stuffed animal, each picture, each dried flower was allowed to draw forward the memories of their occasion. And though the tears began as soon as the first memory played through her mind, Usagi focused on the happiness of each one, the love and contentment she had felt in each moment, instead of her sadness now that those moments were over.

Finally, she reached the bottom of the box and pulled out the final piece, the second hardest memory she knew she�d have to face. It was the pink bunny frame that had sat on her desk for ages. Her family: Mamoru and Usagi hugging a smiling Chibi-Usa, the daughter she would never know. She tried to keep her thoughts from darkening, but it was hard when she thought about Chibi-Usa. Determined to find the hope in each situation as she had once been able to do, Usagi smiled at the pink haired girl, and thanked the fates that she had met the cheerful little brat at all. At least she had gotten to know her before that destiny was erased. Usagi had felt a connection, a responsibility for Chibi-Usa that had helped her to mature while the girl had been in the 20th century. And she would always be thankful for that. Usagi kissed the picture lightly and slowly and carefully began packing everything back into the box.

When everything had been put back, Usagi faced her final challenge. She studied the delicate ring that rested on her left hand: Mamo-chan�s promise to her. The pink heart ring was slid off her finger for the first time since he�d given it to her and reluctantly placed into the box after being pressed against the tearful blonde�s lips. Her hand felt incomplete without the ring gracing her finger. Again, she steeled herself against the looming depression and reveled in her gratitude at the privilege and honor of being beloved of such an excellent man. She silently prayed that all her scouts should be half as lucky as she had been.

With a degree of ceremony, Usagi and Luna brought the box to the attic and placed in gingerly among the other boxes of childhood items that she had moved up there upon moving out. They stood there together, silent tears attesting their goodbyes to the valiant man who had held Usagi�s heart for so long. She knelt beside the box, pressed her fingers to her lips and brushed them against the box.

�Goodbye my love. You will live in my heart forever.�

As they made their way back down the stairs Usagi�s heart was torn. Part of her was screaming to run back up the stairs and bring her things down again. It ranted and raved, yelling at her, declaiming her unfaithfulness, pleading for mercy and an allowance to wallow once more in her losses. But the other part of her, a part which she had ignored for far too long, a part that was growing in strength, felt lighter, taking solace in her duty to her loved ones. She was Sailor Moon, future Neo-Queen Serenity, Princess of the Moon Kingdom. Somewhere in her body was an unbridled strength: strength to live, to fight, to love. She would not abandon the people of Earth by allowing herself to become catatonic in her misery.

And all along, one of the things that had hurt the worst was knowing that she was breaking her promise to Mamo-chan. He never would have wanted her to make herself so wretched on his behalf. He had even told her so in her dreams. She had neglected her duty to his memory, to her promise. And now that this part of her was allowed to breathe, Usagi recognized how tired she was. Tired of being sad all the time, tired of thinking about nothing but how miserable and lonely she felt. Thinking about herself all the time had only made Usagi more unhappy. Now it was time to think about someone else.
- 7
- 8
- 9
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Moon and Stars