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This Image of You	By : FlayraDowitcher Category: +G to L > Hetalia: Axis Powers Views: 2818 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia. This fic is for fun. I'm not making any money off of this fanfiction.

Chapter List
- 7
- 8
- 9
***Warning: Slight yaoi, language, slightly disturbing scenes

***Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia. Title belongs to “November Rain” lyrics by Guns ‘N’ Roses. I own nothing and I am making no money off of this fic! It is for entertainment purposes only!

Chapter 8: Never Mind The Darkness We Still Can Find A Way

“Ludwig, are you okay? You haven’t touched your eggs.” Feliciano asked softly from one end of the table.

“Hm? Oh, yes I’m fine.” He cleared his throat. “How is your breakfast? Is it to your liking?”

“It is very good!” Feliciano smiled but he could tell Ludwig was off in his own world so he continued to eat in silence. That was until the guard tapped the end of his spear on the floor to announce an arrival.

“Master and High Priest Gilbert approaches!” They watched as Gilbert walked in to their dining hall, dressed in his red robes. He bowed to Ludwig and then looked at Feliciano.

“Brother, may we speak alone?” Ludwig answered his question with a nod and stood from the table.

“Feli, you may continue your breakfast here. I will return to you when I am through with my brother.”

Ludwig didn’t wait to hear any of Feliciano’s words as he motioned for his brother to follow him. Ludwig brought him into the throne room where they could have some privacy. He took a seat on his throne and stared at Gilbert standing before him. He studied Gilbert’s face and the subtle look of pure defiance was there. Ludwig knew it was going to be a difficult conversation. He would do his best to remain calm and not lash out at his brother for disobeying and ignoring him. It was hard to keep calm around Gilbert, though. Especially when the man was itching for a confrontation.

“Good morning, brother.” Ludwig broke the silence.

“And a good morning to you, LITTLE brother.”

“What’s with the emphasis on the ‘little’?” Ludwig asked, raising a blonde eyebrow. Gilbert smirked.

“Because that is what you are. You are my little brother.” Ludwig shrugged his shoulders.

“And what does that have to do with the issue we are here to speak of?” He tapped his finger on the end of the chair handle. “I know that is the reason you are here.”

“It has to do with the ‘little brother’ staying out of the life of his ‘big brother’.”

“As a king I can not do that. Brother, you know very well my reasoning for treating you the way I do. It is not to be cruel but to ensure your happiness and welfare.”

“You keep saying ‘my happiness’ yet it has nothing to do with what I WANT!” Ludwig just stared at him. “How do you know what makes me happy? You don’t! I decide what makes me happy! You only want what works best for YOU! That way you can put your head down on the pillow at night guilt free! You have no regards for MY wishes!” Gilbert watched Ludwig’s fists clench against the armrests.

“Shall I just let you run off without a care, then? I can’t trust you to behave, Gilbert. You are naturally scandalous and flirty. I’ve seen you in action. You crave attention and you will do whatever it takes to get it. Your strange looks make you unique and you are attractive over top of it. I never liked seeing those old bastards look and touch you the way they did. To this day it drives me mad and I wouldn’t want to see it happen again. How many times, in my adult life, have I had to punish men who tried to touch you?”

“And how many fucking times, in MY adult years, have I been able to fend for myself? A fucking LOT, Ludwig! I kill and hunt monsters or demons without a twinge of fear! Of course I can whoop the ass of some lame pervert! I’ve let you get away with all this ‘ward’ shit but now it’s starting to piss me off! I want us to come to a compromise!”

“This is my compromise. I don’t want you getting involved with Ivan.”

“And why not? Why? He has proven himself helpful more than once and he hasn’t been anything but respectful to me!”

“I hardly call him sucking the life out of you in the snow ‘respectful’. He hasn’t been here long nor have you known him for any actual length of time.”

“Yet you let Feliciano come here the morning after the incident and claimed him as your future wife! You’ve slept around before and never brought those men and women here! You’re being a fucking hypocrite right now!” Ludwig slammed his fists onto the armrests and stood up. Most people would be intimidated but Gilbert wasn’t afraid. He met his brother’s glare with equal force.

“And what of our fear of you turning into a demon? I can’t just let those warnings be swept under the rug! You were born to tempt and seduce…your hair and eyes are like nothing this world has ever seen…how can I ignore that, Gilbert? How? We don’t even know if you will be sane demon or an evil one! I can’t take the chance.”

“Ivan’s told me that in his world there ARE people who look like me called ‘albinos’ and they are no different from anyone else! They aren’t magical or demons or anything of the like!”

“And you would trust the words of a stranger over your brothers’?”

“I don’t…really know what words to trust. But I am…leaning more towards Ivan’s.” Ludwig frowned. “Plus…” He smirked. “That day at the festival, when you were looking for me? Guess where I was?” He crossed his arms and Ludwig’s blue eyes asked ‘where?’. “I was under the dais, with Ivan sucking me off while you chatted above!” Ludwig’s eyes widened and Gilbert tapped his bottom lip with a chuckle. “Don’t you think I would have grown a demon tail or something by now? It’s almost sex.”

“Gilbert…Gilbert I know you are only being difficult right now because you are angry at me. You didn’t do those things.”

“I did and I would do it again! And I ASKED for it! Ivan and I are courting!” Ludwig loomed over him but Gilbert still didn’t waver.

“I gave you no permission to ‘court’.”

“I don’t need your permission, little brother.”

“But you need your KING’S permission! You are pushing me to the edge, Gilbert!” He warned.

“I am going to continue seeing Ivan and doing what I want! I DON’T NEED YOUR PERMISSION!” He shoved Ludwig away and spun on his heel to leave.

“Don’t you dare walk out that door, Gilbert!” Ludwig hollered. “You are doing this on purpose to spite me! And I will have no more of it! Brother or not you WILL obey my orders!”

“Fuck you!” Gilbert shouted behind him and saw Ludwig coming up behind him.

“GUARDS!” Ludwig called and Gilbert gave a short gasp, rushing out of the room only to collide with a group of guards. They had already heard the commotion and blocked Gilbert from moving. “ARREST HIM!”

Gilbert was unarmed and could do little but punch and kick. He hit a few of the guards but was eventually overpowered. He glared at Ludwig, feeling hurt and betrayed yet his blood boiled with anger. He grit his teeth and tried to pull out of the men’s grips. Ludwig stood there, straight face.

“How dare you…!” Gilbert hissed at him.

“You have defied your king too many times. Your unlawfulness will not go unpunished! I have let you get away with many things but sometimes a person needs a foot up their ass!” He yelled the last part. “This punishment is for your mischievous and provocative behavior behind my back! Take him to the dungeons.” Gilbert’s eyes widened and his body was jerked away, the guards dragging him away from Ludwig.

“You would put your own brother in jail? Ludwig! Ludwig, are you insane? LET ME GO! LET GO YOU BASTARDS!” Ludwig turned his back to Gilbert’s screams. “BROTHER! BROTHER YOU DO THIS AND I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU!”

Ludwig still didn’t look back until Gilbert’s screams grew further and further away. He sighed deeply and rubbed his eyes with his fingers. With a light curse of frustration under his breath he walked back into the throne room and stood by the window. He rests his hands on the stone pane and looks through the diamond pattern panels. What he did to Gilbert was the right thing. Ludwig was his king before his brother, which was how it had to be. At least, that is what his father told him while he was growing up. Ludwig knew their father feared Gilbert in a way and he would never want to see his odd first-born sitting on the throne.

He was given the right to govern Gilbert from his title, the old gods, and his lineage. So why did he feel guilty for sending his brother to the dungeons? He was angry with his brother for going out of his way to cause trouble. He was being arrogant and disobedient, using his ‘I’m the king’s brother’ to get away with murder. But that behavior couldn’t continue. Gilbert’s attitude and risks were going too far and Ludwig couldn’t take any chances. He was becoming more of a child to care for rather than a brother to watch over. Gilbert was harder to control than the whole kingdom!

But in the end, Gilbert was still his brother and the only family he had left. Their mother died of sickness and their father went mad. They had no uncles, aunts, or cousins. It was only the two of them and he was just trying to watch out for his big brother. Gilbert had done the same to him when he was first crowned king at an early age. It was just after their father went mad and killed himself in the bedchamber. It was a rough and frightening time for him, especially when this crown was placed on his head at sixteen.

‘Look at you!’ Gilbert clapped his hands at Ludwig’s reflection in the mirror. ‘You look like a perfect king!’

‘Brother…you are the one who should be sad, not me.’

‘Why sad?’

‘I am king now and you are not. And it is because of your looks above all else that you can not stand in my place, regardless of being the first born.’

‘But Luddy…you dreamt of being king ever since you were little!’ Gilbert smiled at him.

‘Yes…but I thought I would have been father’s age…not sixteen summers. You should be king! You’re five years older! You are done your studies!’ Ludwig had tears in his eyes and Gilbert went right up to him, placing his hands on his shoulders.

‘Ludwig, why are you so upset? What’s wrong? Are you afraid?’ Ludwig looked away but nodded. ‘Hey, that’s nothing to be upset or embarrassed about! You’re stepping up to a VERY big job! A king is burdened with so many things that anyone would feel overwhelmed. And you are still very young so it is perfectly understandable. But you know what?’

‘What?’ Ludwig asked with a sniffle and Gilbert smiled, pulling him into a hug.

‘You are not ruling alone. I’m still here and I’ve got your back, okay? You don’t have to do it alone. And you have many advisors here who will help you. It’s going to be hard at first but you are a very smart boy. You’ll catch on quick. And I know you’ll make a great king!’

‘You think so?’ Ludwig pulled away to look up at his brother.

‘I know so!’ He grinned and pinched Ludwig’s cheeks. ‘You’re still my itty bitty brother, though! That will never change! And I won’t give you a hard time either!’

‘Okay, Gilbie! I’ll do it! Hand me my crown! I will parade around the kingdom proudly!’

‘Now you’re talkin’!’ Gilbert took the crown from the red pillow and placed it on Ludwig’s head. ‘All hail King Ludwig.’ Gilbert bowed to Ludwig’s reflection.

‘Now it’s ‘fuck you, you hypocrite’.’ Ludwig said to himself, quoting his brother’s most recent insult.

The memory made him frown and the guilt was already eating away at him. He already had enough guilt from raping Feliciano and he didn’t need it for his brother. But he wouldn’t let Gilbert get off scot-free. He had to learn how to behave and hopefully try to see things through Ludwig’s eyes. He was still skeptical of Ivan but Gilbert was making an effort of seeing him. This was the first man Gilbert had shown any interest in that wasn’t for flirty fun.

“Courting…Gilbert actually said ‘courting’. He hates courting…but he was serious about it this time.” Ludwig said out loud to himself. The guilt had finally won and with a slam of his fist he had made a decision. “GUARD!”

“Sire!” One of the door guards rushed in, standing at attention.

“Where is Tsar Ivan?”

“I believe he left this morning with Lord Kiku to see the tear, my lord.” Ludwig took a deep breath before speaking.

“When he returns tell him I wish to see him. He must see me before he does anything else. That is an order.” The guard bowed.

“Yes sire! I will see it done! And…your brother?”

“He is to remain in prison until I give further word.” The guard bowed and left. “He’ll forgive me eventually. Gilbert is not one to permanently hold grudges…but he will bring it up every chance he gets.” He rubbed his forehead. “Maybe I rather him never forgive me. It would be easier.” With a simple mutter to himself, Ludwig made his way back to the dining room to finish his breakfast.

Further out in the woods, Ivan and Kiku were on their way to the tear. Both men were on horseback and Ivan followed a few paces behind Kiku. They rode in silence for most of the trip because Kiku was a man of few words. He usually would speak when spoken to, the very few times Ivan was able to hang around with him. Most of what he knew of the others was from what Gilbert would tell him. Alfred and Feliciano were the only ones who would visit their apartment. Ivan was never invited to their social gatherings but he would force Gilbert to go. A cold gust of wind bit at his face and he shuffled his face deeper into his scarf.

“We are getting closer.” Kiku finally spoke.

“How do you know?” He asked through his scarf.

“The wind is very bitter and stronger around the tear. Once we exit these woods we will be able to see it.”

It took a couple more minutes to reach the edge of the forest and they exited out into a clearing. Before them was a shallow slope that led down into a wide field. The area was vast open land and there was a large lake in the center. And above the said lake was what they had come here to see. The tear.

Ivan looked up into the grayish sky where a large, bright white abrasion stretched along the length of the lake. From the sky it would be massively wide but from the ground it looked small. It was bright but unlike the sun they could look straight at it without trouble. The strange phenomenon in the sky did have its own allure of beauty but it was obvious why people were terrified. Ivan could also piece together why the others thought he fell from the tear. The lake was directly under it and he did fall into the water after pummeling through the sky. And it had all started with that tear in the painting of Gilbert.

From what Ivan knew now, experienced, and witnessed only baffled him further. The fact that this world existed through a tear in a painting made even less sense than before. There were many mysteries about the universe and maybe this was just one of them. Nether the less, Ivan was still very curious about it.

“Where are you going?” Kiku asked him while Ivan carefully rode his horse down the slope.

“I’m going to go get a closer look! This is where Gilbert found me! I fell into this lake! I’m almost certain of it!”

“But there may be creatures or monsters down there! You mustn’t go further!” Kiku saw that Ivan was ignoring him so he decided to follow him in hopes of getting him to turn back. “Please Ivan, this isn’t wise!”

“Where is your sense of adventure, Kiku? Aren’t you the least bit curious?” Ivan asked him as he dismounted.

“Well, yes, of course. However, I like doing it through my observatory far away from the actual source.” He said with a flat frown.

“But then you will never experience the- AH!” Ivan gripped his head as a sharp shooting pain shot through it. It blinded him for a second but the pain was so intense he fell to his knees in the snow.

“IVAN!” Kiku dismounted and ran to him. “Are you alright? What’s wrong?”

“Damn it…those voices again!”

“Just…try to remain calm.” Kiku was at a loss for what to do. All he could do was crouch behind Ivan and rub his back, assuring him that he was there.

“Why is this happening?” Ivan cried out and blinked his eyes rapidly while trying to get some focus back into them.

When his eyes finally came back into focus, what he started to see what not what he had expected. He could hear his heart beating in his ears and his head ached with the mumbled sound of voices. The trees ahead of him started to sway in a wind that he could not feel against his skin. His eyes widened when he realized that they were moving on their own. He fell flat against the snow but continued to stare at the trees that were now bending at their trunks. Their branches began to resemble fingers and once they touched the ground, the snow moved. Ivan was uncertain if the hands were pulling the ground to them or if they were indeed dragging closer to him.

“Ki-Kiku…”

“Ivan, what’s going on? Why aren’t you answering me?” Kiku could see Ivan’s violet eyes glazed over as he stared forward.

“M-Make them stop…they’re coming closer…”

“What is?” Kiku felt his hands begin to tremble as his eyes frantically searched the forest ahead for any signs of what Ivan was seeing. “Ivan, I don’t see anything! Tell me what’s wrong?”

“The trees…they’re moving…!”

“Ivan, they aren’t moving!”

Ivan could hear Kiku’s doubtful words but his shaking body and aching head were nothing he was making up. The trees were starting to crawl over one another and begin creating a solid form. Ivan’s eyes continued to watch and stare at the silhouette of a human taking form. For the first time a long while, Ivan was actually scared and it had brought tears to his eyes. The silhouette form lay on its back before opening its red eyes and sitting up. It was clearly the silhouette of a man but when it turned to look at him was when his heart froze in his chest. His mouth opened but nothing came out as his eyes focused on the gaping red wound on the silhouette’s head.

“Gilbert…” He finally spoke and Kiku had heard him.

“Gilbert isn’t here! What do you see, Ivan? Is it like last time? What are you seeing?” Kiku shook him but Ivan still remained in his trance amidst the snow.

“Don’t you…see it? Don’t you hear? They’re all around us…”

Ivan could not avert his eyes from the blackened form of Gilbert with his bleeding, gaping wound. The tears would not stop pouring from his eyes as the gigantic form of his deceased lover wavered in the distance. The darkened form started to melt and the black swarmed across the snow, leaving the area vast and open. His body trembled while his eyes, yet moist with tears, were still burning from not blinking. But what came next enabled him to blink through the tears and he felt his body’s violent tremors start to slow. A bright band of light began to slither along the snow and within it flew thousands of glowing orbs.

“Do you…see it?”

“Ivan I see noth-“ Kiku paused in his words as his own eyes caught sight of the very faint ribbon of light. “What is that?” Even though he could feel Ivan’s body moving beneath his hands he could not look away from the sight. “Is that…what you are seeing?”

“You see it too?” Ivan got up onto his knees and felt himself moving closer to Kiku.

They both stared at the traveling ribbon of light and orbs, its length never seeming to end. One particular orb seemed to stop in front of them and hover in the light. The other orbs flew by it but this one remained. Both pairs of eyes stared at it, unblinking. The orb started to move in random rapid motions and once again Ivan had to close his ears to the voices. Kiku just held the other’s head to his chest, hoping to help block out the sounds for him. They watched as the light and orbs slowly started to fade from sight. The area returned to its normal state and the tear was still present in the sky.

“I-Ivan? Are you…all right?” Kiku asked, his voice shaking.

“I don’t hear voices anymore…but my head still hurts.” He sat up and looked around. “You saw it too?”

“I only saw the light and the orbs…but whatever else it was you were seeing…I didn’t witness it.” He helped Ivan to his feet. “Hurry, we must get back. You need rest and I have to speak to Arthur.” Kiku looked back at the woods and for a short second he saw the ghostly form of who could only have been Gilbert. The features were the same down to a tooth and it gave Kiku a chill up his spine. He chose not to tell Ivan of what he saw.

Ivan stumbled and struggled to get up on his feet. Kiku wasn’t strong enough to support him and he took the smaller man down in the snow with him a couple of times. Eventually Ivan was able to steady himself and climb back up the slope to where the horses had retreated. His mind was a bit of a blank, he noticed, as he mounted the horse. Things were more puzzling now and for the first time in his life, for as long as he knew him, Ivan wanted to speak with Arthur as well. The man, in both worlds, liked to dabble in the supernatural.

When they arrived back at the castle, Kiku wasted no time in rushing Ivan to Arthur’s chambers. They had gotten word that Ludwig wanted to see him but Kiku said it would have to wait. Instead, he had a message sent back to Ludwig to let the king know where they were and what had happened. Ivan was still silent and gripped Kiku’s hand in a vice-like hold, refusing to let go. Kiku didn’t bother knocking but opened the door, pulling the larger man behind him. Arthur looked up from his writing desk, anger clearly written on his face for being disturbed.

“Were you raised in a barn? Have you heard of knocking?”

“We need to speak with you!” Kiku said quickly and Arthur studied the both of them with a curious frown.

“You look white as sheets. What’s happened?”

“Well, while we were looking at the tear…Ivan saw a few things that threw him into a trance of some kind. He heard voices again and he was just…well, it was a very frightening situation.” Arthur got up and went to Ivan, studying his face.

“What did you see?” He asked and motioned Ivan over to a chair.

“It was strange…in a way it felt like I was on drugs but…but I haven’t had any. I saw the trees moving and they turned into hands. They crawled along the ground and then they formed the silhouette of Gilbert. My Gilbert from my world…I saw the large abrasion on the side of his head. I know it was him.” Arthur stroked his chin.

“What else?” Ivan looked down at his boots.

“He changed into nothingness…into black goop and disappeared. Then both Kiku and I saw the same thing after that.” Arthur turned to Kiku, raising a heavy eyebrow.

“What did you see?” Kiku closed his eyes and sighed, feeling his hands start to tremble.

“A ribbon of light traveling the land. Inside were thousands of orbs. One stopped for a moment in front of us before it all disappeared. And then Ivan seemed to have come out of his trance.” There was a knock on the door and Ludwig, along with Feliciano, came into the room.

“I heard you encountered something while at the tear. What’s happened?” Ludwig demanded softly. Kiku quickly retold Ivan’s story and his own to Ludwig. The king looked at Arthur who seemed puzzled but was thinking deeply. “Arthur?”

“Not now…I’m thinking. Give me a few moments.” He went to his bookshelf. “Kiku, give yourself and Ivan some of my nerve herbs. Calm yourselves.”

Kiku nodded and retrieved the jar of nerve leaves. He took one for himself and Ivan to chew on while Arthur rapidly searched through his books. Alfred had woken up and came down to join them but kept silent with the others. Ivan was so lost and troubled that he never realized Gilbert was missing from the group. They were all waiting patiently for Arthur to come up with an answer.

“I think I may know what is happening…or at least I have a better understand of it.”

“What is it?” Ludwig asked and Feliciano gulped, holding on tightly to his lover’s arm.

“Everyone, pay attention closely.”

Arthur stood in the center of all of them and held his staff the length of his body. He closed his eyes and chanted an incantation, his staff lighting up the room with various rays of colors. The colored comets danced around one another before joining together in the air above them, producing four colors: red, green, yellow, and blue. Everyone watched the colors and waited patiently for Arthur to finish.

“From what I read and my own knowledge, there are three main worlds. We have our world.” Arthur used the red colored light to make an abstract shape. “Next we have Ivan’s world.” He used the blue light to connect to the red. And we have the astral world.” He joined the green to the red and blue. “As far as we know.”

“What is the astral world?” Feliciano asked.

“It’s basically whatever is beyond the stars. Sorcerers and magic users, like myself, view it as something even more than that. We believe there are different pieces, or chunks, in the astral world.” He used some black orbs to pile into the green. “Many different things have been known to happen there. Good, bad, dark, evil, good, whatever you would like to think. Most of my magic comes from a lesser form of the forces there. However…” He used the yellow to weave a line between the three colors. “There has been a break between the worlds.”

“What does the yellow mean then?” Kiku asked, feeling his body relax thanks to the herbs.

“The yellow represents what you and Ivan saw together. That would be the afterlife. Or to us sorcerers, it’s one of the chunks in the astral world. But what you and Ivan saw was that part of the astral world here in ours. The tear may very well be another part of this break. That could be how Ivan ended up here. The worlds are beginning to overlap.”

“So what does that mean?” Ludwig asked.

“My guess would be that if the tear gets any larger than all the worlds may be sucked into one. Over time, we may be crossing over into Ivan’s world or visa versa. I wouldn’t leave out the astral world either…for if that collides as well it will be a whole new world. All these monsters may very well be coming from a chunk in the astral world. They are coming through the tear, as we had originally expected.” Ivan raised his hand. “Speak, Ivan.”

“Then what the hell does all this have to do with me falling through the painting of Gilbert? That tear on the painting glowed and I was sucked into it. How do three worlds start in a frame?” Arthur looked at him and gave an uneasy smile. He cleared his throat.

“I thought of that while I was looking through my books. You may not like the hypothesis I have.”

“Tell me.” Ivan demanded.

“You’ve past through the worlds. Something must have happened to you in your world and that’s how you ended up here. My guess would be…that you died in your world and on your way crossing over you got sucked into the tear.”

Everyone gasped and looked to Ivan who looked just as dumbfounded as the rest of them.

“At the time of your death the tear was open. There may be other people who have been mixed up between the worlds. It is often known that people sometimes travel through a dream like state in their psyche that leads up to their brain realizing it has died. You may have been in a coma of some kind, Ivan.” Ivan just stared at him. “During that coma, you bought the painting of Gilbert because he was on your mind. You perceived all this in your comatose state. Once you finally died you ended up here. Now this is just a hunch based off of my knowledge and power. There is much to the mind we don’t understand and the cosmos is still beyond our full understanding.”

“Y-You think I’m dead?” Ivan looked at all of them. “But…but I am here. I am a living being here! I can’t be dead!”

“Maybe he skipped death on his way here.” Alfred said. “Hey, let’s cut him and found out! See if he bleeds!”

“That’s enough, Alfred!” Arthur silenced him.

“Arthur…is that why Ivan was hearing voices?” Kiku asked. “Could that also be why he saw the ghost of Gilbert in the hall? You see I happened to have seen the other Gilbert’s ghosts in the field at the tear. I also think…he was the orb that remained in front of us.” He turned to Ivan sadly. “Maybe he is trying to tell you something.” Ivan’s bottom lip trembled and he looked to Arthur.

“But Gilbert is here! And I am here! If we are both dead in our world than how can we exist?”

“You’re both alive here.” Alfred spoke up and everyone shifted their eyes to him. “Isn’t it obvious? We know for a fact that all of us exist in Ivan’s parallel world. Therefore, Ivan’s parallel self is still in this world and still alive. We said that before. And Gilbert is also alive in this world so that is how they are able to exist. If this world’s Ivan dies, then Ivan will perish. If this Gilbert dies…then he just dies.” He chuckled. “But like Arthur, that’s just my input.”

“Alfred said something smart?” Ludwig whispered to Feliciano but Alfred’s demon ears caught the sound and he growled, sneering with his teeth.

“Alfred may be right.” Arthur confirmed. “But remember, this is still a hunch. There are so many mysteries the universe holds that other forces may be at work here.”

“Then what do I do?” Ivan flashed big, pitiful violet eyes at Arthur. “Is my Gilbert looking for me? Is he a ghost and he is lost? Was I with him before I was swept here? Did I die right there with him?”

“Ivan, calm down.” Arthur went over to him and knelt before him. “Listen to me. Can you remember anything? Anything at all before you picked up that painting of Gilbert?” Ivan looked at him and thought. His brain was foggy from all the news, guilt, and sorrow.

“Um…I wasn’t allowed at Gilbert’s viewing. I forced my way in…saw him laying in the coffin…something happened, Ludwig tossed me out...there were guys talking trash about Gilbert…I flipped out and ran at them. I killed them all. Brutally. I heard sirens…it was the police. I tried to run but I had a heavy pain in my head…and even my body. It was cold…it was late…it was dark-“

“Stop right there. You said you got into a fight? And your head hurt, and you blacked out? Is that right?” Ivan just nodded. “Then what happened?”

“I remember going to the cemetery…there was Gilbert’s grave…but I couldn’t get in. It was locked. I went to a market…bought the painting…came home…and then I was here.”

“That’s what happened.” Arthur smiled. “I’m fairly certain that pain you felt during that fight was you getting badly injured. That injury must have put you in a coma for a while. You found the painting because it was an image of Gilbert that was still on your mind when you blacked out. Once you died, you ended up here but your brain must have processed it through the painting.”

“This is getting very bizarre.” Ludwig said with a slight sneer. “Then Ivan is not our champion who can save this world. If something is going to happen it is out of our reach and control. What could have caused this?”

“Hundreds of things.” Arthur answered but quickly moved out of the way as Ivan wretched and vomited on the floor. “He’s panicking. Alfred, get me the calming powder! Hurry!” Alfred flew to the inventory and took out a glass bottle full of yellow powder. He flew back and handed it to Arthur who took a handful and threw it in Ivan’s face. Ivan coughed and sneezed a few times before falling limp in the chair. “Let’s get him to his room. This was a lot for him to take in all at once.”

Ludwig sent Feliciano off with the others to help get Ivan back to his room. Arthur’s words about Ivan possibly being dead and how Gilbert’s ghost from the other world was wandering the cosmos. He never believed in ghost but now he wasn’t so sure. There was something about the story Arthur told that gave him doubt and a twinge of fear. He had to see Gilbert and release him from jail. Ludwig felt that he was obligated to tell Gilbert of all that he had just heard.

He had made his way down to the dungeon and rushed through the guards, barely acknowledging them. Gilbert was being held in the royal area of the dungeon, which were larger and more comfortable. He was held in the first cell and Ludwig saw him sitting on the cot with his back along the wall. The man appeared to be sleeping but woke up when Ludwig tapped at the bars. Gilbert’s pink eyes glared at him and he put his hand up, looking away from the other.

“I have nothing to say to you.”

“Now is not the time, Gilbert. Ivan has returned from seeing the tear and I’m afraid things are not as they seem.” That got Gilbert’s attention and he stood up from the cot, going over to the bars to face his brother.

“What do you mean?”

“Give me a moment.” Ludwig ordered a guard to unlock the cell door and allow Gilbert out. “We shall talk as we walk. Come with me.” Ludwig kept a straight face as he told Gilbert of the discussion they had in Arthur’s chambers. He left no room for Gilbert to talk until he was finished with what he had to say. “If I wasn’t uncertain about him before I am now. I can’t let you be with him. And I think it will be better for you as well to stay away from him.”

“You know I won’t.” Gilbert said and paused in his walking. Ludwig stopped as well and turned to face him.

“Not even after what I’ve just told you? Think about it, Gilbert. Ivan may not even be real.”

“No brother, Ivan is as real as you or me. I’ve been with him more than you have.”

“Clearly, but that is not the point.”

“Damn it, Ludwig!” Gilbert stomped his foot. “Arthur said so himself that it’s just a hunch! The man can’t even tell if I have a demon inside of me or not! You’re going to tell me he knows more about the cosmos than he does about sensing something inside of me?”

“Then perhaps that ‘something’ isn’t really there after all.” Ludwig said seriously. “I am starting to rethink things…especially after what I heard from Arthur. Since did that...act…with Ivan you should have become demon already. Yet you are still normal. However, that doesn’t mean I am allowing you to do what you want with Ivan. I want you to stay away from him.”

“So just like that? All those years of keeping a lock on my ass you’re just going to let it all go with a few words?” He scoffed. “Sometimes I wonder about you, Ludwig.”

“My answer is still ‘no’ to you seeking out Ivan.” Gilbert glared and shoved his brother in the chest but Ludwig did nothing to retaliate.

“Stop being so fucking selfish with me, Ludwig! I should be able to make my own choices and if I want to be with Ivan than I will!”

“Gilbert…” Ludwig sighed softly. “Gilbert, when we were speaking to Arthur…Ivan did not even mention you. He didn’t ask where you were. The only thing he could focus on was his dead lover, the other Gilbert.” He put his hands on Gilbert’s shoulders and looked down at the slightly shorter man. “You are not his Gilbert.”

“W-What?” Gilbert froze.

“You may look and act like the Gilbert he knew…but you are not him. You were both raised in a different world. Each world, life, and situations were different. What made his Gilbert who he was in their world is not the same as what made you here. Do you understand? He is falling in love with the image of you but you can never be exactly like the Gilbert he has lost. I understand you like Ivan because he is, in many ways, like you. But that is not what is attracting you to him. I know he tells stories about what he and the other Gilbert used to do and you are blinded by that grander. He didn’t do those things with you. You are not the same Gilbert.” Gilbert moved out of Ludwig’s grasp and took a few steps back, looking at his brother with sad eyes. “He is the one Ivan fell in love with, not you. I’m telling you this because I don’t want to see you get hurt. You are not his Gilbert.”

“S-SHUT UP!” Gilbert shouted. “That is for Ivan to decide, not you! He says I’m like his other Gilbert!”

“Brother…”

“I can be twice the Gilbert his old one was!”

“Brother, calm down!”

“I need to speak with Ivan! Out of my way!” He pushed past Ludwig but his brother reached out and pulled him back. “LET ME GO! BASTARD!” Ludwig’s arms wrapped tightly around Gilbert’s waist to hold him in place. “I SAID LET GO!”

“I can’t let you. Not like this!”

“Please…!” His struggled stopped and he covered his eyes with his gloved hands. “Please Ludwig…let me find out for myself. Let me hear it from him…” He rests back against him. “Can’t you give me this, Ludwig? Even if it turns out to be an answer I don’t want to hear…just let me do it by myself. After everything I’ve been through…just give me this. You can trust me, Ludwig.” He said softly.

Ludwig was reminded of that time when he was crowned king and Gilbert’s words to him. As much as it grieved and pained him to do so, Ludwig let go of his brother. He couldn’t see anything good coming from what he was allowing Gilbert to do. It was against his conscience and his judgment, which he rarely ignored. But hearing the slight break in Gilbert’s voice and his pleas Ludwig found himself giving in. On a certain level he could understand the emotional toll their current findings on Ivan was taking on his brother. Maybe it would be better for Gilbert to hear it from Ivan instead of him. However, Ludwig had a feeling the end result wasn’t going to be what Gilbert is hoping.

“Do what you must.” He said with a sigh.

Gilbert didn’t even bother to say goodbye as he ran through the halls to head to the church. Tears stung his eyes and he whipped at them with his sleeve. He couldn’t believe everything that Arthur said or the harsh words his brother spoke. Something inside of him was causing doubt in his heart and Ludwig’s words kept echoing in his head. Right now he had to talk to Ivan and find out if what was said holds any truth. Gilbert had to stop to catch a breath and leaned his shoulder against the wall, panting.

Ludwig’s words were hurting him the most for he was starting to see realization in them. His heart didn’t want to but it was being dominated by his mind. He cursed under his breath and continued on his way to the church. Gilbert ignored the clerics as he barreled through to Ivan’s chambers. When he reached the handle he pushed the door open and stood there. Ivan was sitting propped up on the bed and Alfred was at the foot of it. Kiku was next them but Gilbert’s eyes went straight to Alfred.

“I want him out of here.” Gilbert demanded and Alfred sneered at him.

“I just helped bring your little lover back here. You should be grateful.”

“Gilbert…!” Ivan smiled tiredly at him. “There you are…”

“Both of you, I want you to leave. I want to speak to Ivan privately.”

“Of course. Let’s take our leave, Alfred.” Kiku pat the top of Ivan’s hand and walked to the door.

Alfred followed some steps behind and ignored Gilbert as he passed. Gilbert locked the door and went over to the bed to join Ivan on it. Ivan smiled at him and took his hand. They were silent for a moment until Ivan gripped Gilbert’s hand and pulled the man into an embrace. Gilbert let himself be hugged but he did not embrace back. Ivan pulled away to cup Gilbert’s face in his hands and smile at him.

“I’m so glad you’re here.”

“A-Are you really?”

“Of course I am…why do you sound so sad?”

“Ludwig told me about…about what Arthur said.”

“I see…well, I don’t feel dead.”

“It’s more than that.” Gilbert responded. “I was also told that you’ve been seeing the other Gilbert. You saw him in the fields and in the orbs…and even Kiku had said he’d seen him. You really miss your other Gilbert, don’t you?” Ivan’s brows went up sadly.

“I do. I do miss him. But I have you here. You are just like him.” He smiled.

“But I am not him. I’m not exactly the same as your old Gilbert. That is what Ludwig told me and I fear there is some truth in his words.”

“Gilbert…I have a lot on my mind right now and I don’t know what to believe. My other Gilbert is dead, I know that, but hearing that he may be lost or looking for me is what is tearing me apart. But the thing is, I don’t know! I’ve seen Gilbert’s spirit around here before…” Gilbert looked at him, his features sad and flat. “Or perhaps I’m just crazy. I don’t know. I just worry for my other Gilbert.” Ivan looked down at his hands as they clenched the blankets. “I can’t help but wonder if he is scared or if he is worried about me.”

“Or maybe…just maybe…he’s keeping an eye on you. Did you ever think of that?” Gilbert replied softly and Ivan looked at him, blinking his violet eyes. “If…if Gilbert’s ghost, spirit, or whatever it is is hanging around here…then maybe he’s just watching over you. After Ludwig was born I always swore to watch over him in this life and the next. That’s the kind of person I am. So if I’m anything like your old Gilbert…then he would be thinking the same thing as I.” Gilbert smiled as he said the last part.

“That’s possible too.” Ivan smiled. “I hope it is as you say and Gilbert is just watching over me. But Arthur said I may have been with Gilbert’s ghost, dead, and I got trapped here. I just don’t know.”

“Then stop thinking about it. You don’t have a straight answer so why dwell on it? It’s a mystery of life outside our understanding. What counts now is what we have at his moment. I don’t care if you dead or alive! We’ll figure something out anyway! I’m sure of it!” Ivan frowned.

“But I may perish at any time if my other self is killed.”

“And I could slit your throat right here and now to kill you all the same. That’s called taking a chance! You said that both of us are risk takers and we enjoy dangerous situations! This is just one of them! All we have is today, this moment, right now! We can have many others! I am certain of it!” Gilbert came down from his hopeful high and looked away from Ivan. “That is…if you love me for who I am and not who I remind you of. Both myself and Gilbert were raised in different worlds…we can’t be the same.”

“Oh Gilbert…is that what is worrying you?” Ivan crawled out from the blankets and held Gilbert close. “Yes, there are some differences within you both. But that doesn’t change that the bigger parts of you remain the same! The parts I love the most are shared within both of you.” Gilbert’s eyes widened and he lifted his head to look at Ivan’s smiling face. “You’re right, we do have this moment. We always lived life to the fullest every day like it was our last. That hasn’t changed in my world or yours.”

“But…that still doesn’t change that-“ Ivan pinched Gilbert’s lips together.

“You are my Gilbert…no matter what anyone else says or thinks. This is my second chance to change things and I plan to make things different. I will make different choices with you.” He laughed softly then. “And if Gilbert’s ghost really is watching over me then I have the best of both worlds! I’m a lucky man to have two of the same!” Ivan let go of Gilbert’s lip and the man’s white skin was flushed sweetly. He watched as Gilbert stood up from the bed with his back facing him. “Gilbie?”

“Y-You mean all that?”

“You know I do.” Ivan responded.

Ivan’s brows rose in surprise when the top half of Gilbert’s red robes fell to the floor. The man stepped out of the boots and kicked them to the side. Ivan’s eyes followed the black under tunic as Gilbert slowly undid the front and lifted it over his head. Ivan’s heart raced and his chest heaved with growing desire. Gilbert’s back was pure white like the rest of his body and the dip of his lower back was a favorite spot of his to kiss. His arousal was slowly growing but when Gilbert’s pink gaze looked back at him from over his shoulder Ivan stood at full attention. Everything else had been forgotten and all he cared about was the milky white beauty before him.

“Are you teasing me?” He asked in a husky voice.

“No…this is for real. No one is going to bother us tonight.” Gilbert turned around and undid the tie of his pants as he walked over to the bed. His face was flushed a pretty pink to match his nipples and eyes. Ivan almost came just from the sight. “I’m not going to worry about anything. This feels right and this is what I want to do. I want to do it with you. I don’t care what tomorrow will bring.” He pushed Ivan down onto the bed and crawled over him, looming above the larger man.

“You know…you said those same words the first time we did this too. But are you really certain, Gilbert? You can’t get it back and there is that fear from everyone-“

“Bullshit. I don’t believe that anymore! Not with everything I’ve just heard. You’ve sucked me off and I was fine! And now…we’re going to do more…because I want to.” Ivan’s eyes sparkled with hope. “I…I want you to fuck me, Tsar Ivan.” Gilbert found himself flipped over with Ivan’s lower body resting heavily on his. Ivan held himself up on his hands so he could look down into Gilbert’s beautiful face.

“I’m not going to fuck you. I did that the first time with the other you. This time, I’m going to make love to you first.” He smirked. “Then I’m going to fuck you.” Gilbert gave a quick gulp but his erection was swelling inside his pants and he moaned. “Are you ready to begin? Last chance to stop.”

“Nothing will stop us tonight.”

Ivan brought his lips down in a crushing kiss that left Gilbert breathless.

End Chapter 8 TBC

***I know, evil cliffhanger! But it was either a super long chapter full of too much information and sex or simply wait for the next chapter for the sex. Personally, this sex scene needs to be written with time and care, which I’m sure all of you can understand! ^^

However, I will allow myself to remain in the Medieval Stocks for a day or two as punishment and you can feel free to throw fruit or veggies at me for leaving a cliffhanger like this. ^^
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