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My Sun, My Supernova	By : ditchgospel Category: Gensomaden Saiyuki > General Views: 3283 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Gensomaden Saiyuki, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 8
- 9
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My Sun, My Supernova

Chapter 9

My Pain is Your Pain

Gojyo drives at breakneck speed, desperate to get Hakkai back to the village.
It doesn't take long, however, for it to dawn on him that they will need help
long before they ever manage to get that far. As well, he doesn't know how much
longer he can stay conscious and focus on the road. What's more, this is a
deserted area, with little chance for running into any chance of assistance
along the way.

The events that had brought them to this current state had happened so fast
and unexpectedly, and with such deadly intensity, that it is hard to believe
that they had actually had to leave behind two members of their group. Even
though unsure as to the severity of Sanzo's injury, at least, for now, he knows
that Goku will look after him. Goku is more than capable of protecting Sanzo
from external threats, but what about protecting Sanzo from himself? Can Goku do
that? Can Goku keep him from falling any further into the shadows that seem to
be overtaking him?

His vision blurring and his hands slipping on the wheel, Gojyo's body finally gives in to unconsciousness.

When he slumps down in the seat, Hakuryu transforms. Flying back and
forth over the still bodies of his companions, squealing repeatedly in distress,
he eventually begins to widen his flight path, going higher, and his keen eyes
begin to scan the surrounding area for any signs of life.

XXX

Probably only luck and good timing are to be thanked. That, as well as good
old Hakuryu's faithful devotion and determination, of course. As it turns out,
however, Hakuryu searchs, and finds someone very unexpected, and in the
circumstances, very welcome. Hakuryu greets her almost like a friend, for he
remembers certain previous encounters.

So, Hakkai and Gojyo find themselves brought to the village upon the back of
a flying dragon, by a friend who is not a friend, and they are soon bandaged,
treated and recovering. Demons are strong. Their bodies won't take long to heal.
They are already beginning to consider their next move. Of course, they will go
after Sanzo and Goku. How can they not? Their place is with Sanzo in this
mission. They will see him safely through even if it is the last thing that they
ever do.

Though they aretroubled by the knowledge that Sanzo had been hit in the
attack, and the fact that they are unsure of the condition they had been forced
to leave him in, they can only count on Goku. For the time being, that will have
to be enough of a consolation, for it is their only consolation.
Except...

They now have a possible source of information as to their current
predicament, and are currently engaged in a solemn discussion with their
unlikely companion.

"Miss Yaone, Goku mentioned that Sanzo had seen a fortune-teller in this
village. This in itself struck me as somewhat odd. Sanzo isn't the type to get
taken in by something like that. We were thinking it might possibly have
something to do with his recent unusual behaviour."

Yaone speaks.

"From what you describe, it seems my fears may be true. I had hoped I would
find the information to be merely a false rumour, but now... May I accompany you
in your investigation? I was on my way here to search for evidence of truth for
myself anyway when I came across your dragon. I think I may have an idea of what
is happening, but I want to be sure. I may be able to offer you some insight,
but please be forewarned, you may not like what you hear."

XXX

Together, engaged in a temporary alliance, the improbable threesome begins to
search for leads as to where this mysterious fortune-teller can be found. It
isn't easy, as no one seems to know anything about such a person. Strange,
considering the small size of the town. If something exists here then it should
be common knowledge.

After combing the village in an exhaustive and seemingly fruitless effort,
they finally turn up a hint. Someone happens to mention that a new resident in
the town, a reclusive woman who sells herbs and the like, including incense,
reminds them of a type who might be into fortune-telling, but that that isn't a
service the woman offers, at least not that they are aware of.

Incense.

This could be what they're after, and they waste no time in finding the
mentioned location.

They find the place unattended and unlocked, and so proceed to let themselves
in. The smell of the different substances that greets them is strong, but not
unpleasant. Not like the pungently putrid smell of the incense Sanzo had been
burning. Also, alarmingly, it does not cover the thick scent of death permeating
the air.

Pushing their way through the curtains into the next room, the source of the
smell is revealed. The body of a woman lies on the floor, dressed head to toe in
green, and judging by her posture she had been trying to crawl towards the door
just before death. There is a pool of dried blood beneath her head, and a swarm
of flies is busy at work. Bending down, Gojyo lifts the veil she wears over her
face, and averts his eyes at the sight that is revealed. Yaone gasps, covering
her mouth with her hand. The woman's face is forever distorted in an expression
of horror, and there is blood caked around her nostrils, and down her face.

A moment of grim silence is shared, as they consider the implications of
their discovery. Next, a thorough search through the herbal items, which seem to
be disturbed somewhat, as if someone has been doing the exact same thing before
their arrival, soon reveals an odour matching Sanzo's incense. Yaone looks over
the substance with concern spreading over her face.

The incense and bleeding from the nose definitely seem to connect Sanzo to
that dead woman, but so far it is still a mystery to Hakkai and Gojyo. They look
to Yaone now as the only key to possibly solving it.

XXX

Goku and Sanzo's journey continues, with just the two of them heading
westward. To Goku, it almost seems as if time has stopped, that's how tranquil
the atmosphere has become. Sanzo is still recovering, and remains resting in the
back of the little wagon that has become their refuge. He has been mostly quiet,
except for sometimes speaking oddly about things that Goku can't make coherent
sense out of, and so he just listens, and doesn't ask.

Although a calm has seemed to descend upon the pair, Goku still can't shake
the feeling that it is an omen of worse to come. It scares him that he has no
idea what Sanzo has on his mind, what he might do next, as his behaviour has
been so bizarrely erratic and unpredictable of late. But he doesn't know what he
can do except keep going, take care of Sanzo as best he can, and wait.

It turns out that he doesn't have to wait long. Only once since parting from
their two companions does Sanzo suffer another nosebleed, this time only a tiny
dribble, and Sanzo does not even bother to break out the incense at all. After
this episode, Sanzo begins to grow restless. He becomes more insistent in his
requests for Goku to help ease his pain, to which Goku willingly complies.

Until, Goku's premonition of impending trouble actually comes to pass, and
things change.

XXX

Goku finds himself waking in the night, with an odd and eerie sense of deja
vu causing him to go instantly on edge. He had fallen asleep in their little
nest in the back of the wagon, with Sanzo's arms around him, but now Sanzo is
gone, and he is alone with only the smell of blood.

He jolts alert, feeling like he is awakening to a nightmare. He climbs from
the wagon, calling Sanzo's name into the darkness, scanning frantically and
following his sense of smell.

Finally, over by the brook, he finds Sanzo crouching on the rocks at the edge
of the water. Goku allows himself to breath a small sigh of relief, but does not
yet swallow his apprehension. He approaches.

Sanzo is facing away from him, towards the water. He is shivering and naked,
his skin and hair soaking wet. Goku calls his name questioningly, and in
response he turns to face Goku.

Goku is stricken to the very bone by what he sees.

Sanzo's eyes are glazed, and he holds his little pocketknife in a tightly
clenched fist. His priest's robe lies discarded at his side, and has been torn
and slashed into pieces. Worse, his body is covered in cuts and gashes, the
marks on his arm from the previous episode re-carved. On the opposite arm he
has engraved another word:

U N H O L Y

His hands are covered in blood, and his skin is smeared with the glistening
red liquid.

This time, Goku's bursting heart does not react to the fear by trying to
escape. This time he rushes forward and drops to his knees in front of Sanzo,
taking a hold of his wrist and wresting the blade from his possession.

Oh, if only he had thought to confiscate this horrible implement of harm, but
he had not, and now it is too late.

"Sanzo! Sanzo, what did you do? Why, Sanzo, why?
Tell me, Sanzo. Talk to me!"

He drops the knife and takes a hold of Sanzo's other wrist as well, blood
coating his palms from the wounds. He gives Sanzo a good shake, trying to get
him to focus on him. And suddenly, he does. His eyes meet Goku's directly, and
seem to clear a little.

"Goku? How much will it take, Goku? How much will be enough?"

"Sanzooo! Please just stop! I can't... I don't know what I'm
supposed to do! Sanzo?"

Sanzo seems unaffected by Goku's outburst, and Goku releases his hold on him,
throwing his own hands down instead to his knees as he kneels on the rocks. A moment
of shaky breathing and stillness, and then he raises his head at the sound of
Sanzo's voice.

"Goku, how much will it take to cleanse myself of this... holiness. How
much blood must be shed? I don't want this soul, Goku. No. It belongs to
Konzen, not Sanzo. It doesn't... fit... me."

He closes his eyes and shakes his head, and then smiles sadly at Goku.

"Goku... my Goku... you are the only thing... the only thing I have to hold onto.
The only treasure I have that has any value. Not the scripture... not my title...
not even my own existence... only you."

"Sanzo?"

"Goku, if I were to hurt you, would it be enough then? Could I wash out my
soul... if I used your blood? Mine doesn't work, Goku. It's not enough. If
I were to hurt you... would you let me, Goku? Would you let me hurt you?"

"Sanzo? Why do you need...

"Please, please help me Goku. Only you can do it, only you. Will you
help me? It hurts. It hurts so much."

His heart breaking with his longing to relieve Sanzo's torment, Goku scoots
forward and wraps him in his arms.

Sanzo kisses Goku gently on the top of his head, and then leans forward,
easing Goku down onto the rocks, straddling his body and caressing him with
blood-smeared hands. Then, he picks up the blade, and as he presses it to Goku's
skin, Goku feels himself go numb.

Through the stinging numbness, he thinks that if only he can take away
Sanzo's pain, then everything will be okay, and if to do that, it means he has
to take Sanzo's pain upon himself, then maybe that's okay too. Maybe that's
okay.

For he will follow the light of his sun, even if its fire burns him alive
every step of the way.

When he feels the blade cut into his skin, he closes his eyes, and deep
inside, he cries.
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- 9
- 10
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My Sun, My Supernova