Come What May

Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation nor do I make any money from using the characters. I am a part owner of Kyosuke, though.

NC-17

If you have time, please review. Thank you!!

Note: Well this chapter turned out to take far longer than I thought it would. But not for the normal reasons. The story took a turn in this chapter I didn’t see coming. The result was 21 pages. When I was writing chapter 11 – I (with the aid of Ashcat’s amazing idea factory,) decided to rearrange the story. Chapter 11 will now be chapter 10 and this chapter required major revisions. Seven pages in total cut from this chapter – holding in limbo for the next Eiri chapter (possibly – 12?) It’s all very convoluted and I’m sure boring to hear about. The good news? Chapter 11 (which was chapter 10) is finished. But now I have to finish the replacement chapter 10. Confused? I know I am.

Anyway – as always, thanks to my lovely and charming betas, Ashcat and Kri*Kri for putting up with my changes and last minute rewrites. If there are any errors in this chapter (and I’m sure there are) I touched it last. And I touched it a lot.




Come What May


Chapter 9
A Night Like This


Say goodbye on a night like this
If its the last thing we ever do
You never looked as lost as this
Sometimes it doesn’t even look like you
It goes dark
It goes darker still
Please stay
But I watch you like I’m made of stone
As you walk away

I’m coming to find you if it takes me all night
A witch hunt for another girl
For always and ever is always for you
Your trust
The most gorgeously stupid thing I ever cut in the world

Say hello on a day like today
Say it every time you move
The way that you look at me now
Makes me wish I was you
It goes deep
It goes deeper still
This touch
And the smile and the shake of your head

I’m coming to find you if it takes me all night
Can’t stand here like this anymore
For always and ever is always for you
I want it to be perfect
Like before
I want to change it all

I want to change
************************************

I woke up early and alone. I was also a little on the sore side. Shuichi had been gentle with me, but I wasn't used to being… well, on the bottom. And I wasn't convinced I would enjoy the experience on a regular basis, but allowing him to have me the night before seemed important.

I was certain I was losing my mind.

Slipping into a robe, I padded out of the room and went in search of my lover. After a brief search, I found him in the living room. He was on the floor lying on his back, his hands supporting his head. He had his eyes closed and his headphones on, but I suspected he was not asleep. He was probably brooding about something.

I studied his face closely. Worry lines marked his features and I was relatively certain it would not be much longer before he snapped and blurted out what was bothering him. It couldn’t be as bad as he was making it out to be.

Could it?

I already knew about Nakano. And Sakuma. And… that other one. I’d seen the scores of tabloid photos of him with his fanboys.

Had we talked about the fanboys? Did he know I knew about them? Well, as much as I wanted to, anyway. Maybe the fanboys were what was worrying him.

Maybe.

The fanboys didn’t really bother me.

Much.

I knew all about fucking groupies and I wasn’t worried about him resuming that lifestyle.

Not much, anyway.

Sakuma didn’t really bother me anymore. Not since Shuichi had told me that they had not slept together.

Nakano bothered me a little bit, but I had seen how Shuichi had treated him. He had been harsh and cruel to his best-friend-turned-lover. Tohma had told me Shuichi had only bedded Nakano out of a fear of being alone, but his anger and cynicism had turned their love affair into somewhat of a nightmare for the guitarist. It made a bizarre sort of sense to me.

And then Inoue… But that was a vastly different set of circumstances. I was certain Inoue was not what was bothering him.

Then what else? Or maybe, at this point in my train of thought, I should say or who else?

"I thought that was my thing," he said softly as he watched me through one half-opened eye.

"What?" I asked.

"Staring at you while you sleep."

"You're not asleep."

"True." His violet eyes opened. They were bloodshot.

"Did you sleep at all?"

He shrugged. "I'm going to see Tohma today. Maybe I caught his insomnia."

"Tohma has insomnia?" I asked with surprise. For some reason, I had always imagined Tohma sleeping like a baby.

"Yeah, he suffers from brutal insomnia. I don't think he ever sleeps." He rubbed his eyes. "If you walk into his office at 3:00 AM, you'll find him awake at his desk."

"You know from personal experience, do you?"

It was only a fraction of a second, but the panic on his face confirmed my fear.

Tohma.

Visions swirled through my head and my stomach lurched.

No. It couldn't be.

I looked at Shuichi's guilt-ridden face as he said, "Eiri, are you all right?"

Then again, maybe it could.

"Did you and ..."

He jumped up, "I'll make coffee."

"It's too early,” I said as I shook my head, struggling to recover from my shock. “Why don't you come back to bed?"

"I'm sure I wouldn't sleep," he answered with a sigh.

"Come on," I held out my hand.

He took it and meekly followed me into the bedroom.

As we were getting into bed I asked, "What were you listening to?"

He stared at me with obvious doubt about the sincerity of my interest. "Suguru and Hiro sent me some music they've been working on. It’s sort of a side-project with Kyo and Tanaka-san, the drummer from Suspended Animation. They wanted me to write some lyrics for it."

"Why do you sound so skeptical?"

Frowning he said, "Because it's perfect without lyrics. The song doesn't need words."

"That good, huh?"

He scoffed as he said, "It's fucking brilliant. If they keep this up, I'll be out of a job."

"I wouldn't worry too much," I tried to reassure him. "Your lyrics will always have a home with the mentally insipid public."

“You still know the right thing to say to make me feel good, don’t you, Eiri?” He said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

“Huh,” I answered as I pulled him close. “Go to sleep.”

“I told you I wouldn’t be able to,” he answered with a sigh but he snuggled into my side anyway, resting his head on my shoulder.

“Then just lay there and keep me warm,” I said quietly as I wrapped my arms around him.

“We have to go to therapy today.”

“I know,” I kissed his head. “Maybe then you can tell me what’s bugging you.”

He raised his head up far enough to make eye contact, and said with a warning tone, “Be careful what you wish for, Eiri.”

Shrugging I said, “Whatever it is, we’ve been through worse.”

“Tch,” he answered dismissively. “You have no idea what you are saying.”

“Maybe not,” I rubbed his back.

After several minutes of silence, I heard him mumble, “I love you, Eiri.”

I tightened my hold on him.

Eight hours later, Dr. Umeoka and I stood side-by-side staring at the ruined doorway of the therapy room. Shuichi had kicked it off its hinges and it currently lay on the floor in the hallway.

The Doctor turned to me and asked, “Uesugi-san, do you have any idea what Shindou-san is so afraid of?”

“I have my suspicions,” I answered as I slid into my jacket. “I intend on finding out for sure, and right fucking now. I’ve had enough dramatics.”

“Uesugi-san,” he said very softly, soothingly, “do you feel that is wise? It is possible what Shindou-san fears may truly be something you have trouble coping with. Will that not bring all of his greatest fears to fruition?”

A chunk of molding fell off the doorframe and crashed onto the floor.

“Then you tell me,” I snarled. “Is it better to know or better to remain ignorant and imagine horrible things? Imagining my lover being fucked bloody by my brother-in-law?” I grabbed the wall to steady myself and closed my eyes before I continued, “Sometimes I can see it so clearly, and I can hear Shuichi’s cries of pain. Even worse, sometimes I can hear his cries of lust…”

He stared at me. He kept his features neutral, but I could see the shock underneath as he said, “You have a very vivid imagination, Uesugi-san. Do you really feel your lover would willingly participate in such a tryst? And with someone he equates with such negative feelings? And what of your brother-in-law? What would Seguchi-san possibly gain by agreeing to such a thing?”

I laughed. “You do not know Seguchi Tohma. He’d fuck his own grandmother if he thought the act would be of use to him in the long run.”

“Without regard to your sister?” he continued to reason.

Mika. It was true that of all people in the world, Mika alone held Tohma’s leash. She could effectively pull him in line by yanking on his choke chain. Many times, Mika chose to look the other way. But, overall, I had observed Tohma’s steady respect for her.

Occasionally, when Tohma was being a bit more than friendly with me, I did question his devotion to my sister. However, no matter how many times he had flirted with me, he had never completely crossed the line. I didn’t think he ever would.

I was certain in his bizarre way, Tohma actually loved Mika. I knew he confided in her, as least a little. I knew he trusted her, at least to a point. And that sliver of trust was more than anyone else had from Seguchi Tohma.

Did she know what happened between Tohma and Shuichi? I would lay money on it.

“I have to go,” I said to the Doctor as I stepped through the ruined doorway.

My phone was in the car and once I got in, my shaking fingers dialed Mika’s number.

“Why, Eiri! Can it really be you?” She teased with obvious delight.

“What happened between Shuichi and Tohma when I was in New York?”

After a moment she sighed she said, “I knew it was too good to be true. Here I imagined you were calling for a simple chat.”

“Mika…” I said warningly.

“Succinct as always, I see,” she said with irritation lacing her voice.

“Well?”

“Eiri, I don’t think…”

I interrupted her, “Damn it, Mika, just tell me.”

“I take it Shuichi hasn’t told you anything?” She asked.

“No.”

“Well, you need to speak to either Shuichi or Tohma,” she explained sternly. “Do not drag me into this mess.”

Mess? “Well, I’m not talking to Tohma about it. He’ll twist it.”

“I don’t think he will, Eiri,” she said quietly. “But if you’re worried, why don’t you ask Shuichi?”

“He’s… missing at the moment.” I pulled out my cigarettes.

“Missing? Oh, Eiri,” she sighed again. “What happened this time?”

“We were at therapy and…” I lit a cigarette, inhaling deeply, feeling the calming nicotine enter my bloodstream.

“And?” she prompted.

“And then he went crazy. Started ranting like some mental patient about a conspiracy and being forced to say things he didn’t want to say. Revealing things he shouldn’t have to. How the therapist and I were ganging up on him.” I inhaled again.

“What were you talking about?”

I leaned my head back in the seat, “We were trying to get him to talk about what he went through when I… when I left him and was living in New York. He started out fine and then he froze up and wouldn’t say anything else.”

“What did you say to him, Eiri?”

Even though she couldn’t see me, I shrugged anyway, “I told him I knew about him sleeping with the fanboys.”

She waited.

“He was a little freaked out and a little surprised, but also he seemed relieved.”

“Then?” she prodded.

I turned the cigarette in my fingers. “Then I told him I knew about Nakano and he laughed. You know that cold, cruel laugh he has? And then he went on to tell me I didn’t know the real story. I told him I thought I knew some of it and we started to argue about it. It was a stupid argument.”

“Aren’t most arguments?” she said comfortingly. “And I don’t mean only those between you and Shuichi when I say that.”

Taking another drag I continued, “It escalated. I brought up Sakuma. And then Inoue.”

“For god’s sake, Eiri…”

“I said it was stupid didn’t I?” I snapped as I considered hanging up.

“Eiri, what finally happened?” she asked softly.

“Anyway, he brought up all those women I used to… anyway, I lost it. I accused him of sleeping with Tohma and he went berserk.”

I heard her breath catch and she asked, “Was that all you said?”

“I might have called him an easy fuck.”

I could hear her groan.

“Mika?” I asked, afraid to ask more.

“I think you need to speak with Tohma, Eiri.”

My stomach lurched again. “They didn’t…”

“You must speak with Tohma.” I could hear a child crying in the background. “Eiri? Listen to me, speak to Tohma, and then come see me, okay? I’ve got to go.”

“No, wait. Mika?” the line was dead.

Well, fuck.


I sat in my car in NG’s parking lot, my head spinning and my stomach turning as I tried to process the information Tohma had so viciously dumped on me. I was convinced he enjoyed giving me all the gruesome details, almost taking a perverse pleasure in my misery, knowing he was wounding me by telling me about Shuichi’s final step into darkness. How Shuichi had gladly offered himself to Tohma.

How Shuichi had done it for me.

And then I had puked on Tohma’s beloved Persian carpet. It served him right, the evil bastard.

I was having a difficult time believing Shuichi had attempted to seduce Tohma. How could that scenario of all scenarios be possible?

In my head, I could hear Shuichi’s cries again. The ones that I thought only I could coax from his throat. He had offered himself up, naked and high, on Tohma’s mahogany desk all for my lousy phone number.

To Tohma.

He’d been willing to give away everything—and for what? For the chance to have me insult and then hang up on him? Because I could almost guarantee that is what would have happened.

Yet he did it anyway and he did it for me. The stupid idiot. As if one hair on his empty head was worth sacrificing for me. I was accountable for yet another scar.

My stomach turned again and I had to throw open the door to the car in order to throw up onto NG’s parking lot. When there was nothing left in my stomach and my breathing had returned to normal, I reached for my phone.

“Eiri?” she answered almost immediately but flatly.

“I’m on my way now. I have some questions I want to ask you.”

“All right. Be careful on your wa…”

I hung up.

My family.

First my father. Then Tatsuha. Now Tohma.

I needed a drink.

Stopping at a nearby bar, I ordered a scotch and thought about my family and their treatment of Shuichi.

My father… my father had treated Shuichi as if he was nonexistent. That shitty old man would look right through my lover as he made suggestions of marriage prospects for me. Every time we went to Kyoto for a visit, Shuichi was practically inconsolable afterwards. He would cry himself stupid for days over that asshole’s insensitive remarks.

Of course, as my father’s son, I would pretend that I didn’t care.

Finally, after two years of torture, Shuichi refused to go anymore. He quit attending family functions that included my father. It took me a while to figure it out, but once I did, I commended him internally on his wise decision to exclude himself, despite knowing how deeply the separation hurt him.

I never bothered to tell him I understood the way he felt, I did nothing to ease his pain or his feelings of isolation. I made no mention to him I felt he was infinitely more important than my father was.

And then there was Tatsuha. Tatsuha and Shuichi had gotten off to a rocky start, but later, Shuichi had considered my brother a friend. Tatsuha had been the only refuge for Shuichi at the family functions, playing video games together and listening to that stupid Nittle Grasper music incessantly. The two of them were close and Tatsuha invariably sided with Shuichi if there was any kind of falling out between Shuichi and any other family member, including myself.

Tatsuha had told me he and Shuichi had nearly slept together when I was living in New York, but Tatsuha had backed out. Now we knew why.

Turning my dark thoughts away from that path, I considered how Shuichi felt when he learned of my brother’s treachery. Tatsuha had destroyed my relationship with Shuichi for his own selfish reasons. He had used my name and my face countless times to get himself laid. Feeding the tabloid frenzy of “Yuki Eiri: The Womanizer, The Unfaithful Boyfriend.” And when Shuichi had walked in on “Yuki Eiri” fucking some bimbo fan, my lowlife brother never had the balls to tell us the truth, he had kept silent.

For six months after seeing ‘me’ screwing some woman, Shuichi cried himself to sleep every night. I ignored him until he could take it no longer and he exploded at me in a furious fit of rage.

Even though our breakup was the inevitable end to his playing dress up, Tatsuha continued his silence. He never did tell us. We were fortunate enough to find out the truth through other means.

And now Tohma. The most treacherous family member of all, the one member Shuichi could not avoid, had touched my lover in ways I could only see when I closed my eyes.

My family. To make it complete, Mika should have been present to watch Tohma do whatever he did to Shuichi. Sometimes she was present when I closed my eyes.

I needed to look my sister in the eyes and ask her if Tohma fucked Shuichi. I needed to know for certain what had happened. Before I could face Shuichi again, I needed to know how badly I had failed him.


As I left the bar, I called Shuichi. I had to tell him something, and I was relieved and concerned when all I received was his voicemail. I hoped he was with Mirai or his sister and not out with…

I hoped he was with Mirai or Maiko.

After leaving him a vague message, I left Tokyo.


Late that night, I sat in the garden by the koi pond, chain smoking. All the sounds from my childhood home that normally helped to sooth any pain I harbored did not even reach my ears.

My father was frail, he seemed to have aged many years since the last time I’d seen him. He was older, smaller and weaker, but still vile and controlling. My years of separation from him had done little to soften my disdain for him.

I was not surprised to learn he blamed me for Tatsuha’s ‘downfall’.

What I did find interesting was his cutting comments no longer bothered me. He was akin to a fly buzzing around my head and he became simple to ignore.

“Uncle Eiri?” my four-year old niece Umi asked quietly. She sat down next to me.

“Shouldn’t you be in bed?” I accused.

‘Umm, probably,” she blinked her big Tohma-like eyes at me. “Mama will be mad if she catches me.”

I glared at her as I took a drag, “Then why risk it?”

“Cause you seem so sad. I want to cheer you up!” She placed her hands behind her and leaned back to gaze at the stars.

She barely knew me. I had spent little time with her, yet, in her child’s innocence, she still wished to console her surly Uncle. I thought about how we all eventually lose that ability for compassion. Someone I loved and trusted tore my compassion from me and, in turn, I destroyed Shuichi’s compassion with my repeated cruelty.

“Are you sad ‘cause your Shuichi isn’t with you?”

I jolted at her question and snapped, “What?”

“Mama says Shuichi-singer is your match.” She tipped her head coquettishly and said, “I hear his music and I like it a lot. I never met him, but Mama says he’s my Uncle, too.”

Hmm. How very progressive of my sister to speak frankly of my boyfriend with this precocious child.

“Will you bring him here sometime?” she asked with a bright smile as she moved and huddled against me.

“Are you cold?” I asked.

She nodded.

“Then you should have stayed in bed,” I lectured her.

She gave me the doe-eyed and patient Tohma-like stare. It was… unnerving.

Well, I guess she couldn’t be held responsible for who her parents were. I sighed heavily as I threw away my cigarette and opened my arms in invitation. What else could I do? She climbed into my lap like the obedient, trusting soul she was.

“How come Shuichi-singer never comes here?” she asked as she snuggled into me.

“It’s none of your business,” I answered sharply.

“Cousin Suguru says it’s Grampa’s fault,” she replied, ignoring my harsh words.

Suguru? Of course, Tohma’s cousin. Of course, my niece would have met Fujisaki and of course, Fujisaki would have told Umi-chan the stark truth. It was his style.

“Cousin Kyo says the same thing.” She continued, unperturbed by my silence.

Inoue? What the… Of course, how could I forget Tohma’s plethora of musician cousins.

“And Uncle Ryuichi and Aunt Pico-Pico Noriko, too.” She snuggled into me and said with a yawn, “They all say he’s fun to be around. Even father agrees. I want to meet him.”

Uncle Ryuichi and Aunt Noriko, Inoue and Fujisaki had all come into this house enough to make a lasting impression on Umi-chan. And all of them, including Tohma, had spoken fondly of Shuichi.

I was the one, blatant exception.

“Come on,” I said as I stood up with her in my arms.

“You are tall, just like Uncle Tatsuha! Father never gets me this high in the sky!” She giggled. “Uncle Eiri, can I come visit sometime?”

As I carried her back in the house, I answered, “Maybe. But not until you get a little older.”

She smiled. Her smile was an eerie combination of Tohma and Mika. “With you and Uncle Shuichi-Bad Luck-Singer?”

“Maybe,” I answered sternly as I placed her in her bed. I was certain Shuichi would like that.

“Yay!” My niece’s sea-colored eyes sparkled and she clapped her hands.

“Shh,” I grumbled at her. “I didn’t promise anything. I said maybe.”

I made way to exit, but not before she leapt up and grabbed me in a four-year-old’s version of a bear-hug. “Thank you, Uncle Eiri.”

“Hnn,” I answered. “Now, go to sleep.”

Stepping out of Umi-chan’s room, I closed the door quietly behind me. I turned to find Mika watching me intently.

“Already thinking of ways to corrupt my daughter, are you?” Mika accused.

“Huh,” I answered. “She started it.”

“She likes you,” Mika smiled.

I shrugged as I said, “She’s just a kid. She doesn’t know any better yet.”

“Eiri,” she smiled. “Don’t be so hard on yourself.”

I wandered back outside and Mika followed me, sitting next to me by the pond.

“What’s with the ‘Uncle Shuichi’ stuff?” I asked reaching for another cigarette.

“What else would you have us call him?” she answered with a laugh. “Uncle Eiri’s fuck toy? That’s hardly appropriate.”

“Doesn’t the old man have a fit about it?”

“At first. But now he refers to Shuichi as an Uncle as well.”

Taking a deep drag I said, “Too little, too late.”

“Maybe,” she said as she leaned back and looked at the stars, just as her daughter had done earlier. “So, I suspect you want to know about Shuichi and Tohma, am I correct?”

“Yes.”

“There’s really not much to tell, you know. Shuichi tried to seduce Tohma to get your phone number.”

I stared at her, “Did he succeed?”

“Does it really matter?” She said with a shrug.

I glared at her.

“I mean it, Eiri,” she answered harshly. “What difference would it make? You were long gone, only a memory of better days for Shuichi. He was desperate, miserable, and in pain. Where were you? He was left alone and rudderless. How dare you even attempt to pass judgment on his behavior?”

“I wasn’t passing judgment,” I defended.

“Oh really?” she snapped.

“Look, Mika,” I answered, feeling my anger rise to meet hers. “All the stuff he did… it’s a little shocking. It’s a lot for me to accept.”

“Well that’s just too fucking bad for you then, isn’t it?” She asked, her voice dripping with sarcasm. “Honestly, Eiri, just quit with your wounded boyfriend act. So what if he fucked half of Tokyo?”

“He did fuck half of Tokyo!” I snarled.

“So? He fucked the male half and you fucked the female half. I’d say that makes you even.”

“But I didn’t…” I swallowed. “Not with people he knew.”

She laughed, “And what’s Mirai?”

“I didn’t… How did you…?”

“Holy gods, Eiri!” She exclaimed. “Who do you think picked up the pieces when you walked out on him? It was a group effort to keep that boy going after you stormed out in a fit of self-pity. Tohma and I tried; we really tried to honor your wish, to keep Shuichi from you. Did you honestly think that feat was a cakewalk? He never stopped trying to find a way to get to you. Well, not until the end. How can you be surprised to realize he would attempt to seduce Tohma? Isn’t he the same boy that allowed himself to be gang raped in order to protect you?”

My stomach turned again as she paused for a moment to get her anger under control before she continued.

“We kept you insulated from the raw truth and maybe we shouldn’t have. However, that doesn’t excuse you from your part in this. Before you decide Tohma was a bad person or Shuichi was a slut, maybe you should take a good look at your own actions. The cold, hard truth is you were gone, Eiri. So it’s time you suck up any pain or anger you feel at Shuichi or Tohma or for that matter Kyosuke. Because we both know, all of us know, if you had stayed in Japan, there was not a chance in hell Shuichi would have ever dreamt of seducing or sleeping with anyone other than you.”

She was right, I did know. “It’s my fault,” my voice cracked when I said it.

Shaking her head my sister said, “No, Eiri. It’s no one’s fault. But it did happen. So I think now the question is how do you go forward?”

It was my turn to look at the stars. Finally, I answered, “Maybe, if I had never come back, he would have found happiness with Inoue.”

“Maybe,” she said and then she smiled at me. “Eiri, must I remind you how Shuichi kicked the emotional teeth out of Kyosuke not once, but twice? After everything that has happened, after everything you have been through, why would you even dream Shuichi would want anyone other than you? Please, Eiri, spare me and everyone else from your melodramatic martyrdom. Each time you’ve attempted it before, you have failed miserably.”

“It’s…” I sighed. “It’s not easy, Mika. He’s so suspicious now.”

“And why shouldn’t he be? He’s afraid of being hurt, afraid of being left, afraid you are not sincere. I guarantee, Eiri, if you walk out on that boy now, his greatest fear will come true. If it hasn’t already.”

“That’s what our shrink said,” I admitted.

“Well, it’s hardly a difficult diagnosis to make.”

Clearing my throat I said, “I promised him I wouldn’t leave him.”

“Then don’t,” she answered, as if it was that simple.

Maybe it was.

After a few moments of silence she asked, “Have I answered all your questions?”

“I guess.”

She glared at me.

“Okay, yes.”

She tipped her head to the side before she continued, “Frankly, Eiri, I was surprised to learn that Shuichi agreed to even see you again after your long spree of self-indulgence in New York.”

“It took some groveling,” I muttered.

“Really?” She gave me another smile. “Well then, I suggest you do some more. And soon. He’s close to a point of no return.”

“Huh,” I grumbled as I lit another cigarette.

“I mean it, Eiri.”

A chill washed over me as I considered her words. She might be right about Shuichi being at a point of no return, he was quite possibly done with me. After a few quiet moments I asked, “Do you think it will work?”

“Groveling?”

I nodded.

She sighed, “If it was anyone else in the world I would have to say ‘no,’ but you and Shuichi? Yeah, it will work. You two seem to thrive on drama.”

“Huh,” I answered. Picking my words carefully, I continued, “Why would he want to be with me, Mika? Between my family and my own social inadequacies, why does he keep hanging around? Why doesn’t he learn?”

“He is learning, Eiri,” she answered quietly. “That’s why he’s at the point of breaking. Your departure from Tokyo might have already done it.”

“I’m going back tomorrow,” I announced.

“Does he know that? Does he even know where you are?”

He didn’t. I hadn’t bothered to tell him.

“Maybe you should call him right now,” she advised as she stood up. “And try to get some sleep. That’s a long drive to attempt without any rest.”


I tried but I couldn’t sleep. And I could get no answer from Shuichi. I tried multiple times, but he didn’t answer. By this time, he had probably figured out what had happened.

Had he called Tohma? If he had, I was certain he would get the wrong idea about my disappearance. I lay on the futon and fretted most of the night.

When Sakano called me the next morning, I was already on the road.

“Yuki-san,” he began slowly. “Have you spoken to Shuichi?”

“I can’t get a hold of him,” I answered.

“He is missing, Yuki-san. We were hoping you might have an idea where he might have gone to.”

“Fuck!” I exclaimed. “Did you check that whore house?”

“Yuki-san, I’m not sure ‘whore house’ is the correct label for that… establishment,” he answered patiently.

“Really?” I asked with sarcasm in my voice. “Then what do you call a place where you can go and get laid by paying money?”

“I suppose… but regardless, Seguchi-sama does have contacts inside that place of business now, and Shuichi has not been seen there.”

Hmm. Well, at least he wasn’t screwing his brains out at some Yakuza stronghold. I guess that was good news.

“Did you check with Mirai?”

“Not yet,” he answered. “Seguchi-sama did not want me to alert you as of yet, but I felt…”

He trailed off. Good old Sakano. Always looking out for true love. “I’m on my way back now. As soon as I get into town, I’ll see Mirai. And his sister. Did you call Nakano and that other one?”

“Yes. They have not heard from him.”

Fuck.

“Well, as soon as I speak to Mirai and Maiko, I’ll let you know.”

“Good. And I will call you if I hear anything,” he said.

“Huh.”

“And Yuki-san?” he added.

“Yeah?”

“About Shuichi and Seguchi-sama,” he hesitated.

I held my breath.

“Do you remember when I called you in New York and asked you to be kind to Shuichi? When I told you I had given Shuichi your phone number because the alternative was too horrible?”

“I remember,” I whispered.

“I believe you are now aware how he planned to obtain your number.” He paused. “I was present that night – Seguchi-sama summoned me as soon as he suspected what Shuichi was up to. It was a very ugly incident, Yuki-san. I believe it was a very close call for both of them. Please, I beg you, do not fail him again.”

I hung up and tossed the phone to the empty seat next to me. Sakano could be such a fucking do-gooder.

Tokyo was still two hours away. I pressed my foot down on the accelerator. Maybe when I arrived home, Shuichi would be there, and then everything would miraculously be all right.

It was not a likely scenario.

I prepared myself for the inevitability that there would be some negotiation required. And possibly, and only if necessary, a little groveling would be in order as well.

TBC

Lyrics for “A Night Like This” by The Cure


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