Virginity

I don't own Saiyuki, but I am madly in love with them!

I just figured I'de throw this one out there for the sheer hell of it. My mind startd exploring Sanzo as a virgin and this is what I've come up with. (Being a secluded monk with an extreme sense of personal space I figured he probably would be a virgin until those damned demons get a hold of him.)

Chapter 1
Sanzo grit his teeth and ground out the last of his cigarette. The monkey was going about his usual evenings routines with far too much noise and fanfare and Sanzo was more than pissed that he had to deal with it. The monkey's snoring wasn't the only thing that was grating on his nerves. He had a reasonable expectation that when he wasn't hearing the monkey snoring, he was going to hear whatever late night activities the other two seemed hell bent on engaging in. That, more than any noise the monkey produced would make his nerves stand on end. He almost hoped Goku would have a noisy night just to drown Hakkai and Gojyo out.

Sanzo had engaged in a campaign to keep the two separate at night whenever they had to share rooms in twos. More often than not he stuck Gojyo with the monkey, having to overcome much complaining and deal with a whole lot of bickering to do it. It saved him from hearing other things.

Besides that, Hakkai was the only one of them he really could handle having as a room mate. He was neat, clean and above all, quiet. Once he settled into his bed and fell into sleep the only thing Sanzo would hear, ironically, was the monkey's muffled snoring through the wall. That was ten times more preferable to having it in the same room. It was a hundred times better than hearing Goku in his ear and those other noises.

He'd had no such luck tonight.

Gojyo and Goku's complaints were obnoxious but it inevitably would be Hakkai who would eventually insist, in his quiet and persuasive way, that Gojyo get his way. The only thing worse than sharing a room with the monkey would be sharing one with the kappa. Sanzo shuddered at the thought. The worse thing Hakkai would do would be to bitch about his cigarettes. The kappa was likely to get around to making a pass at Sanzo sooner or later. It was bad enough Sanzo had to deal with his innuendo in the open, let alone a pass at him behind closed doors. Sanzo crossed his arms and gripped his elbows. He wasn't so sure he would be able to repel the kappa if Gojyo got too pushy.

Goku had a relatively quiet night that night and Sanzo couldn't sleep. His mind was too occupied with the combined feelings of dread and anticipation he experienced on nights such as this. The moon was huge outside and the air was warm. Sanzo opened the window by his bed, giving up on sleep, and lit a cigarette.

“Why should I give a shit what they do?” he mumbled to himself. He was sure nothing was going on over there that hadn't gone on for the last couple of years. The only difference was they no longer had distance and privacy from each other. The two had decided not to abstain despite it, but maintained at least a charade of propriety.

Sanzo had found it irritating to no end the first time. He'd actually been quite livid when his sleep addled brain awoke to the passionate sounds through the wall that first time. He hadn't been able to look at the two in the eye for days. The only reason he hadn't marched straight into their room to put a stop to it was he didn't want the embarrassment of actually seeing them in action. He'd settled for making quiet stabs at them the next day, hoping they would get the hint. They did, for a while.

Fucking rutting demons, ruining his sleep.

What was taking them so long?

He waited and he listened. He questioned the logic and wisdom of the Merciful Goddess, and the sanbutshin. Why would they want these two to accompany him? His only responsibility for Hakkai was to make sure he didn't go on any more bloody rampages, keep an eye on him. The other one he would otherwise have nothing to do with.

His mind alerted to movement from the other side of the wall. Sanzo returned to his bed and leaned against the wall. He was disgusted with himself. He knew he should not be getting a thrill out of listening in on the other two, had he not tried to put a stop to it? Still, he somehow had chosen the bed with a shared wall, and had relented too easily on the rooming arrangements.

He could hear a voice, Hakkai's, whispering. Sanzo pushed his ear to the wall, getting a naughty thrill from eavesdropping.

I shouldn't be doing this.

A low moan echoed into Sanzo's head and ignited something inside him.

I shouldn't care what they are doing.

He could hear movements, rhythmic and steady.

Why does this give me a charge?

Sanzo closed his eyes and ignored his rising blood. He pulled his ear from the wall and rested his head into the over stuffed pillow the hotel provided. Moments later his ear was plastered to the wall again and he could hear Hakkai's sex sounds.

He really didn't need to know what Hakkai sounded like. If he didn't listen, he would not be turned on. He would not be finding himself fighting the desire to envision Hakkai's face when he made those sounds, nor Gojyo's face when he made Hakkai make those sounds.

Sanzo was getting an erection and he tried to pretend it wasn't there. He refused to masturbate to the low moans and gasps he could hear. The sounds were so muffled they were coming in bits and pieces and Sanzo knew they were trying to be quiet.

Don't be so quiet, the walls are too thick. Let me hear...

I shouldn't be listening, I shouldn't be interested, and above all I should be disgusted.

Sanzo shifted and ripped his ear from the wall. He rolled over and tossed about. It was late, he couldn't sleep and rolling onto his belly was out of the question.

Sanzo shuddered and gave in. He ran his hand under the waistline of his pants and grasped his neglected cock.

God damned, why do I feel compelled to do this?

Then, clearly he heard Gojyo cry out, and under it the sounds of Hakkai's climax. At least he thought that what it was because it usually came at the end and then they would grow quiet.

Sanzo stroked himself, remembering the rythim of the bed creaking next door. What exactly did they do over there? What did they do to each other that they made such sounds? Sanzo had never made such sounds. They sounded so much like pain. There was pain, of that he was certain, but the pain in Hakkai's voice always melted into something else- similar yet not the same.

Could he make Hakkai sound like that?

Would Gojyo make him sound like that?

Baka! This is all so stupid. Priests are supposed to maintain their virginity.

They weren't supposed to smoke, drink or kill either.

Sanzo bit back his voice when he came in his hand. Now he had a mess to clean up. Usually, if he needed to take care of himself he did it in the shower, in its relative privacy and made short business of it.

The pictures in his head and the sounds from next door added another dimension and was making him break his usual habits. He'd never seen anybody in a sexual way before- except for that time when he was a child...

Sanzo shut his mind on that. He understood it better now that he did then and he might as well not think too hard on it or he'd get a headache.

Whispering next door. His anger rose. He was above this, should be above this. He needed to end the whole thing or he was going to go insane. There should be nothing keeping him from looking those bastards in the eye.

He looked at his rather sticky hand. He never did this like this before he started on this journey. The damned demons were hell bent on corrupting him.

Is chastity anything worth holding onto? He was chaste in nothing else, so what did it matter. Did it matter?

Sanzo eventually fell asleep.