At All

At All


Yuki lay in bed, cuddled up to a pillow. He had his arms and one leg wrapped tightly around it in much the same way that he stretched out beside Haru at night. He was dreaming, muscles twitching, brow furrowed.
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It was cold; clammy, damp, and freezing. Dark, too, as he looked around. And then his eyes lit on the bars, and he thought his heart was breaking, the pain was so intense.

‘No….oh no, no, no…no, no…please not again!’ He ran to the iron barriers and beat his hands against them, futile. They clanged, disturbing the quiet, echoing down the hallway as Yuki felt tears on his cheeks.

“What is it, my little Rat?”

Yuki froze at the voice. It couldn’t be….Akito wasn’t…this had to be a dream…didn’t it? Akito wasn’t….

“Are you trying to disturb everyone’s fun, you horrid little thing? They’re all in the main room. It’s New Years after all…we were just about to sit down to eat.” And indeed, Akito was dressed in New Year’s finery, kimono bright against the dimness of the room, hair sparkling with combs and clips. “I was coming to get you anyway, you needn’t have made such a fuss. Everyone knows all you wanted was attention, anyway.”

Yuki shook his head, no, that wasn’t what he’d wanted. That was the last thing he wanted. He tried to speak up and correct Akito, but his voice had deserted him…he wasn’t sure he’d have trusted it anyway.

“Well,” Akito sneered, “if its attention you want….I’m sure we can come up with some way to….ensure that your needs are met.” Yuki noticed the fabric Akito carried over one slender arm. Thrusting the bundle through the bars, Akito snarled, “Put this on. Now. Don’t make me parade you, naked, in front of the entire family. They already think you’re disgusting, Yuki…because you’re the Rat. Do you want to prove them right?”

Akito didn’t turn away as he slowly stripped off his clothes, goosebumps rising on his skin from shame and cold, combined. He fiercely willed back his tears, gritting his teeth hard enough that he heard them grind. The garment was gorgeous…but female. Soft silk, lavender, with silver and pink roses embroidered heavily upon it.


Roses….Yuki felt as though that should be important…that was something that should make him smile…. But Akito expected him to go out in this? It was a girl’s kimono…heavily layered and with a dark purple and silver obi to match. He tried to tie it…but he was a boy. He didn’t know how to tie an obi…..

“Yuki! It’s a simple task! Do you want everyone to think you’re stupid?” Akito unlocked the bars and came striding in. Yuki, despite himself, took three steps back before Akito had him by the hair. The god spun him roughly, hand tight in the smooth locks, and fastened the obi tightly….too tightly. So tight that Yuki could scarcely breathe. He squeaked in dismay, and then again in pain as Akito jerked him around again.

“You should thank me for helping you, Yuki. Ungrateful little freak…” and then, Akito began to slap him, blows raining down on his head, his cheeks, and his sensitive ears, making him reel. “This is why I have to keep you locked up here, Yuki….this is for your own good, Yuki… If anyone else ever saw you, they’d tell you how much of a freak you are…how disgusting and abnormal and *Wrong*. I’m the only one who loves you, my little Rat…You’re all mine, Yuki! Hear me? All mine!” Akito stopped, panting for breath, and Yuki found that, despite how much he wanted to…he could not for the *life* of him straighten from his cringing position.

“You’ve made everyone wait long enough for your grand entrance, Yuki!” Akito hissed, and grabbed him by the hair again, at the top of his head, just like Tohru, once. Yuki struggled to keep up as Akito dragged him, unyielding, down the hall to the main room, where he could already hear everyone laughing and talking. He began to fight. No, no, no…he didn’t want to go in there….not like this….not to see all of them…

The doors flew open under Akito’s shove, and bright, merry light shone in Yuki’s eyes, blinding him.

“I’ve found our errant member!” Akito crowed, gaining everyone’s attention. “The little rodent was playing dress-up!” Akito flung Yuki out in front, and he blanched, mortified, as every single Sohma he’d ever seen blinked back at him. “It seems like crossdressing runs in the family, doesn’t it, Ayame?” Akito laughed manically.

“Ah well, at least the lost are found, and now it’s time to eat!” Akito paused, looking at Yuki with a vicious smirk. “At least, feel free to eat if Yuki-*chan* hasn’t robbed you of your appetites.” With that, Akito was gone…and Yuki was left facing the collected Sohmas.

Most of them passed him by with not much but an odd look or harsh whispers. But some paused and stared…and Yuki could see the horror in their eyes, the disgust and the…the hate. His brother passed him by then, and Yuki tried to call out to him…he really did…but all that came out was a squeak. Aaya turned to him then, frowning.

“Please, Yuki. You are a human being. Do I hiss instead of speaking?”

And with that, he was gone, Shigure barking laughter at his side.

But then a pair of arms wrapped around his waist. Yuki jumped, the memory of Akito’s stinging slaps fresh on his body and in his mind, but a soft, warm nose nuzzled at the spot right below his ear, and he felt the metal of a hanging pendant brushing the back of his neck.

“…Haru?” His voice was thin and weak.

“Yuki…babe….wake up.” A kiss was pressed to his ear, and Yuki felt himself relax. “Wake up.”



His eyes opened. Arms were around his waist, and someone was nuzzling at the spot right below his ear.

“Haru….” He came fully awake, then, and twisted in the Ox’s arms with a gasp, coming face to face with sad, mist-grey eyes. Haru’s thumb brushed tears from his cheek that he must have shed in his sleep.

“Yuki…I’m sorry I wasn’t here sooner. If I had known….”


Yuki shushed him with a shaky kiss.

“It doesn’t matter Haru…you’re here now. All that matters is you’re here at all.”

~Fin
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First Furuba story I've posted....it would be really nice to get some reviews....I'd be forever grateful and it might inspire me to write more!! <3

~Tareacel