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Marred Memories Of a Silhouette	By : DHaugsby Category: Gensomaden Saiyuki > General Views: 774 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Gensomaden Saiyuki, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Marred Memories Of a Silhouette
- 1
Disclaimer:� Saiyuki is owned by Minekura Kazuya

Marred Memories Of a Silhouette

Kouryuu!

Rikudo collapsed
against a tree as he paused in his flight, one hand clutching his shoulder
where the strange youkai boy had bitten him, the other hand scraping its nails
into the sharp bark of the tree.�� He
pressed his cheek into the tree�s rough texture as he gasped in air, hearing
the crumple of the talisman adhered to his skin as he attempted to center
himself and find comfort with the knowledge of his power from the many
talismans covering him.� The rain had
stopped but his robes were soaked, and the bitter smell of the tree, along with
the chill against his skin, helped to calm him somewhat.

Kouryuu�

Through the haze of
agony radiating out from his shoulder, an image of Kouryuu, now grown into a
fine man and last seen sprawled on the ground with his life�s blood flowing
from him in rivers, burned itself into his brain.� Rikudo could still feel the impact in his hands from when his
staff had stabbed into the only thing he had ever loved.

No, the only thing Shuuei
had ever loved.

Kouryuu!

�Shut up!� he roared at
the anguished voice inside him.� �Just
shut up!� You never shut up!�� His shoulder screamed in harmony with the agony
pulsing from the Araya talisman embedded over his heart, Rikudo turned, and
pressing his back against the tree he let himself slide down until he was
resting on the ground.� The trunk
supported him as he sat on the rain-soaked earth and from long practice he
muted the sounds of Shuuei�s mutterings.�
He could still hear them; they simply became a background disturbance.

The emotions coursing
through what remained of the Clerk Abbot were, however, more difficult to mute.

For all the years
Rikudo had existed since Shuuei had joined himself with the Araya talisman, the
abbot had never quieted in his laminations, his feelings of self-disgust and
pity on all the sacrificial youkai they had murdered.� He�d also continued to cry and moan at the pain and injustice at
having witnessed his fellow monks slaughtered by the youkai, the act that had
finally driven him to complete the spell that had always been a temptation to
him.� He�d scream his hate while at the
same time sobbing against the deaths.�
Then, when the Araya demanded to be nourished, he would cry out his
yearning for the souls that fed the spell and his hatred of all youkai, while
also begging to spare their lives.

Always so
contradictory.

Tearing a strip of
cloth from his sash, Rikudo wadded it under the neckline of the wrapped
garment, soaking up as much blood as he could before pulling out a talisman,
the stiff paper it was written on dry from the rain.� Chanting, he pulled the blood-soaked fabric away and slipped the
paper over the wound.� It quickly
absorbed into his skin and sealed the wound with the hot, burning sensation
that he grown accustomed to.� The pain
was nothing compared to the agony that constantly coursed through his veins,
only appeased when the unending hunger of the cursed Araya talisman embedded
over his right breast was sated.

That youkai boy�s soul
would give him some peace.� Some relief
from the pain.

All their souls would.

Kouryuu!� Dead!

Shut up!

Resting against the
tree, Rikudo let the pain in his shoulder lull him, so the voice of Shuuei
could have dominance for a while as his own thoughts strayed to the youkai
youth who had rendered his talismans impotent.�
Just what kind of creature was that boy?� No youkai could withstand the power of his spells and the paper
they were written on.� But he had � with
ease.

Kouryuu, Shuuei still moaned in his thoughts.� You killed Kouryuu.� Using my hands, you wiped him from this
world.� Kouryuu, Kouryuu, Kouryuu. �Shuuei continued to chant, his voice
moaning and crying and carrying on.� In
Rikudo�s mind, he saw the start of an old memory trying to rise to the
surface.� The memory of the night Shuuei
had cast the cursed spell; the night he�d been born.

�He was nothing,�
Rikudo scoffed in an attempt to stem the memory.� His voice so much rougher and more graveled than it had been
before he become who he was now.� �A
petty human who stood in my way.� He
deserved to die for associating with youkai.��
The Araya talisman throbbed where it lay embedded in the flesh of his
chest, reminding him that it was not yet satisfied of its hunger for youkai
souls.� Those it had taken earlier that
night hadn�t been enough.

�with youkai�� Why would he travel with youkai?� Kouryuu would never�

�He did!� He betrayed his master by associating with
the bloodthirsty monsters.�

We are now a bloodthirsty monster�

A grimace of a smile
showed Rikudo�s teeth in acknowledgement of the thought.

Now that some of the
talisman�s energy had to be transferred to heal him it hungered for more,
spreading a burning fire through Rikudo that threatened to consume what was
left of his soul if it remained starved of others long enough.

It hurts.� It burns.�
We must make it stop.

�Yes,� Rikudo
agreed.� �We will feed it.� With the souls of the youkai Kouryuu joined
with.�

Those youkai.� It must have been them that forced Kouryuu
to betray his past.� It�s all their
fault.

�He�s better off
dead.� We did him a service.�

� a � service�?� No!�
He�s dead!!

�Better off dead.� How dare he try to stop us!�

Kouryuu was a
beautiful child.� Holy and pure.�

An image of the young
monk, before he�d become a Sanzo, his silhouette illuminated by the moon, rose
into Shuuei�s memory and Rikudo savagely ripped it away, wishing Shuuei had
never known the boy.� In retaliation,
Rikudo brought up a false memory, one of Kouryuu creeping into Shuuei�s bed and
offering himself to the monk.� �This is
what you wished for.� This is what you
dreamed of every night.� You wanted that
boy�s body and you wanted to corrupt it � to ravish him in all things
carnal.� You should have done it.�

Noooo.� You�re wrong.� He was too
young, then.� I was waiting.� Waiting for him to grow older, to be ready.

�You should have taken
him when you had the chance.� He would
have let you.� You know it to be
true.� That�s why you�re wailing so much
about it now.� Because you�ve been
reminded of how you�ve missed out on your chance to posses his innocent, young
body.�

He was so
beautiful.� So pure.� Heavenly.�
I wanted him.� I WANTED HIM!!

�He�s dead
now!� Gone.� Gone forever.�� Rikudo
started to laugh but stopped when the laughs threatened to turn to moans of
grief.� Rikudo didn�t feel grief; that
was an emotion for Shuuei.� Weak
Shuuei.�

The prayer beads around
his neck stirred and Rikudo�s attention diverted to them, also noting how the
talisman pulsed once again, sending a hungry yearning through him.� He�d always thought the red beads to be no
more than an ornament.� A trinket.� A memento to Shuuei�s past to remind the
former abbot of just what it was that had originally broken his resistance to
the temptation of using the cursed Spell of Araya; of how he had finally lost
himself after Kouryuu had abandoned the temple.

�A rare gift,� the boy
had said as he held out the beads to him.�
A gift Shuuei had kept all these years for sentimental reasons.� But they had never been anything more than decoration
until tonight.� What had caused them to
fire a protective light over the youkai youth, allowing Rikudo to make his
escape?� Where did such power come from?

From Kouryuu, Shuuei whispered.

Shuuei had quieted
somewhat, falling to simply whispering softy in the dark corners of Rikudo�s
mind.� As the cursed man slowly allowed
himself to relax enough to rest, Shuuei�s muttering became a soothing monotony,
allowing Rikudo to think of sleep.� The
Araya talisman continued to thrum, still hungry, but he was used to that.� The prayer beads stirred once again.

��No.� he responded quietly to Shuuei.� �That power came from the beads.� And your beloved Kouryou was likely dead by
then.� Perhaps he should have died long
ago.�

Nooooo� Shuuei moaned.�
So hungry.� Always, it�s so
hungry.� Will it never be sated?

�Not while there are
souls to feed it.� And perhaps not even
then.��

Shuuei moaned again and
Rikudo allowed his eyes to close, his body reaching out for much needed
sleep.� He dreamed Shuuei�s dreams,
falling into memories of Kinzan Temple and the night Rikudo was born�

�There!� Gather more monks and make a stand
there!�� Shuuei wasn�t consciously
shouting his order, his level of fear and adrenaline did that for him.� For the second night in a row, the temple had
been pulled from sleep and meditation by the screams of men and the howls of
youkai.� Now, in hindsight, Shuuei
realized that, of course, they would be attacked again.� After all, the youkai had taken only one of
the sutras kept at the temple during the attack the night prior.

But the other sutra,
Kouryuu�s sutra, was no longer there.

Had Shuuei been
thinking clearer, he would have automatically corrected himself, making himself
think of the boy as Sanzo Houshi-sama, not as Kouryuu.� Although, in his heart, he would always
think of the newly chosen sanzo as Kouryuu.

A youkai, his� long, pointed ears pierced with gold hoops
and a red tattoo slashing across his face, suddenly appeared before
Shuuei.� The Clerk Abbott jerked to the
side, narrowly avoiding the long blade wielded by the creature.� Shuuei�s mind blanked out as he parried,
spinning around and whipping out a talisman.�
Slapping the strip of paper onto his attacker�s arm, he saw the youkai
convulse and drop, his demonic face frozen in an image of shocked rigormortis.

Shuuei looked
around, another talisman clenched in his hand.�
All around him were dying monks and savage beasts.� He was glad Kouryuu had managed to make his
escape earlier that day; Shuuei couldn�t stand the thought of the boy being in
the middle of this again, witness to more slaughter.

�Clerk Abbott!�� A grab to Shuuei�s robe had him spinning
around, but the sight of one of his subordinates stopped his attack.� The boy was covered in blood and his arm
hung at his side, obviously injured to the point that it had become
useless.� His eyes were frantic and
confused.� �Why is this happening?� the
boy yelled.� �They�re killing us!� What do they want?�

The Maten Scripture,
Shuuei thought to himself.� They
want the second sutra.� But he didn�t
say that to the young monk, instead he shook off his hold and pushed him in the
direction of the group he had instructed to stand against the attack.� �Join the others there!� he shouted, not
having time for explanations.� �Add what
strength you have to the others!�

Dazed, the boy�s
head swung about, until he spotted the gathering of robe-clad figures Shuuei
was pointing to.� Sluggish, he limped
off to join them.� The chanting of the
monks created a base rhythm to the raucous symphony of the battle.

They were losing the
fight.� There were just too many youkai
and the monks were ill-trained to stand against such a brutal force.� Shuuei reached a hand inside his own
blooded-soaked robe and fingered the forbidden talisman he had hidden
there.� He�d been secretly carrying the
talisman, the forbidden Araya Spell, for years � ever since he had first
discovered the spell.� The power it
possessed, and the power it would grant him, sat like a demon on his shoulder,
tempting him to take that power for himself.

The Araya Spell
would turn this battle to their favor.

But, just has it had
done all the other times that temptation drew his hand to activate the spell, a
voice always stopped him.� Just as it
did this time � although this time the voice was nearly drowned out by the
screams of his dying brothers.

The voice belonged
to Kouryuu.� The youth had stated just
yesterday that the only master Kouryuu would ever acknowledge was that of
Koumyou Sanzo, and at that moment, Shuuei somewhat understood Kouyuu�s
statement.� Shuuei�s faith in Buddha was
shaken by what was happening around him, but his faith in Kouryuu, and in
Kouryuu�s purity � along with the image burned in his mind as how the youth
looked in silhouette against the gentle light of the moon - once again pulled his
hand away from the cursed paper.

Shuuei was jerked
from his thoughts by a spear ripping through his robe and grazing his
thigh.� Berating himself for allowing
such wayward thoughts to distract him, he centered again on the battle.� Stumbling slightly and shaking the weapon
away, he spotted the youkai that had thrown it.� Ignoring the pain in his wounded leg, he charged and slapped the
Rikudo Shishi talisman he still held in his other hand against the arm of his
attacker, watching the creature convulse and drop to the ground in the same
manner the previous youkai had.

Another spear went
flying by him and Shuuei ducked, scrambling toward the monks, who were chanting
as a group, in an attempt to ward of the youkai.� Joining his voice to theirs, the syllables and words came easily
to him as they cast the spell to repel the horde.� When the spell went off, dozens of youkai were propelled backward
through the air to crash and tumble along the ground, many of them not getting
back up.� However, dozens upon dozens
more took their places.� Their howls of
rage and bloodlust increased.

The monks
scattered.� Shuuei dug in his robes for
another talisman as his other arm swiped sweat away from his face, smearing
blood and dirt across his vision along with the stinging perspiration.� He knew they were losing the fight.� That there was no way they would be able to
fend off the youkai � not without help.

He again thought of
the Araya Spell and his fingers closed over the thick paper it was written
on.� Finding refuge behind a tree, he
pulled it out and squinted at the writing in the dim light of the stars.� He knew the script on it by heart, having
stared at it many times, his fingers reverently tracing over the ink and
tightly woven paper.

His leg throbbed and
he could feel his muscles shaking in exhaustion.� He tried to bring the image of Kouryuu back to mind, but all he
could see was the talisman.� It was
calling him.� Appealing to his
fear.� Telling him it was the only way.

And Kouryuu was no
longer here to keep that seduction at bay.

His face twisting
into a terror-filled grimace, he ripped open his robe, exposing his chest, and
slapped the talisman onto the skin over his heart.� Chanting the words necessary to activate the spell in a voice
coarse with pain, Shuuei felt a clenching in his chest and a surge of
unbelievable power spread throughout his body.�
He bent over double, hacking, before an intense hunger swept through
him.� A hunger for souls.� Youkai souls.

On the ground before
him, next to one of the high monks of the temple, was the high monk�s staff,
the rings at the top lying in a pool of the priest�s blood.� Shuuei reached down and picked it up, a
strange sound emerging from his throat.�
Dimly, he recognized the sound as laughter as he straightened once
again, his eyes falling on a pair of youkai that had just spotted him.

His teeth showed in
that same painful smile, he extracted another talisman and ran his tongue along
the back of it.� The youkai paused in
their advance on him, wary of his actions, but rather than tossing the spell at
them, he pasted the paper on his own cheek, chanting to activate the
spell.� Another pulse of power went
through him as the energy of the talisman was fed to the Araya Spell.� He laughed harder.�

The two youkai began
to back away, uncertainty clearing some of the bloodlust from their eyes.� Bloodlust that was now burning in Shuuei�s
eyes� - no, not Shuuei � Rikudo had just
been born.� And it was Rikudo who
brought out more talismans and launched them at the youkai, his mad laughter ringing
louder than all the battle screams.

***

It was the prayer beads
that woke him.� They were humming and
twitching around his neck, pulling him from the restless sleep.� Rising to his feet, he found the sun was
well up, and in the recessed part of his mind he felt Shuuei stir.

Kouryuu.

Shuuei resumed his
crying over the man�s death.� So clear
now was the memory of young Kouryuu sitting in the moonlight, his silhouette
stretching across the wooden floor of his room.� It was that cursed memory that fought to keep Shuuei alive.� That memory, and those dammed beads around
Rikudo�s neck.

Many times Rikudo had
tried to remove the prayer beads that circled his throat like a shackle, but
something had always prevented him from accomplishing it.� Something had always stopped him.

These dammed beads.

Why had Kouryuu thrown
his body in front of the youkai boy, anyway?�
Didn�t he hate youkai as much as Shuuei did?� Youkai had killed Koumyou Sanzo, after all.�

The Araya talisman
filled his body with pain, demanding death to feed its unending need, but the
beads were pulling him somewhere, urging him to travel through the forest in a
specific direction.� The talisman filled
his body with pain and a need to seek out souls to feed it, but the beads were
insistent.

He began walking,
following the urgings of the beads.� The
farther he traveled, the harder the beads pulled, until he was speeding through
the trees in a race to wherever it was he was being led.

He broke through the
trees to spot a lone, familiar figure on a rock, this time in radiant
silhouette against the light of the morning sun.

Kouryuu!
- 1
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Marred Memories Of a Silhouette

Marred Memories Of a Silhouette

We are now a bloodthirsty monster�