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Last Wish	By : shawriteyou Category: Death Note > Yaoi-Male/Male > L/Light Views: 1127 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: death note is not mine, if L and Light mine, well I will make them married instead killing each other!!!hehehehe… it is the property of Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata, I don't make any money from writing this.

Chapter List
- 1-Last Wish
- 1
Last Wish.

Disclaimer: death note is not mine, if L and Light mine, well I will
make them married instead killing each other!!!hehehehe… it is the property of Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata, I
don't make any money from writing this.

Warning: language

Summary: one shot that tell what Light thought before he died.

Review please!!!And don’t flame me if you don’t like it! It hurt so
much!!! Hehehehe…just give me some good critic so I can make it better!! Okay!!!!
n_n

If I can change…

if I can choose…

And back into that time… a time when we’re together…

A time when we share our life, our fate, our time and our
happiness…will I choose to forget my dream??? Or will I choose to not love you?
Humph…I wonder…which one would make me better now…

Because…living my life without you…now is almost
impossible…

Being happy without you now is almost impossible …

I’m smiling…but my heart cries every time I missed you…

I’m happy…but my chest feels so heavy and its make me
want to choke…

Why L…

Why… even thought you already leave me forever…your
scent, your smile, your voice, your warmth and everything I ever taste about
you…still linger on me as strong as when you’re alive…

I hate it.

I absolutely hate it.

Because it’s make me suffer so much!!!! If I know…living
my live without you could kill me like this…I will choose to kill myself…I will
choose not to meet you…I will choose not want to see you died in my
arm…smiling…

Oh God…I never know…that loving someone can be so
hurtful…and even thought I never believe that you exist…and I never believe in
fate…but here I’m now…half dying and waiting my time to come…so in the end…I
still want to have my last word…and I want to you to know…the one that kill
Kira is not this damn brat called Near or something…fuck…I have to admit it to
you…because at least I hope you will tell it to him…I hope…even thought I know
this is impossible…you’ll tell L…that Kira already dead when I love him…kira
already died when I lost him…kira already dead when I miss him.

And in the end…I let Near to kill me…because I already
died too…when he leave me…but of course, I must make it look so cool…Kira death
must look so excruciatingly and have a bit action…who could blame me to want
that??

But…even I’m death…I can’t meet you…it obvious right???
You’ll stay in high and might heaven…and I… huuuuh…I don’t want to think about
it now…it’s so pathetic…and I don’t like to mourn about my fuking next fate
when I died…

It’s all you fault L.

And you know what??? I hate you L. I still fuking hate
you because you can make me became like this...

But I still miss you so much…

I miss those eyes. Those big black and deep eyes that
always look at me with so much enthusiasm when we fight, when we had an
argument or when we had sex. Those eyes can make me feel so calm and so nervous
and of course…it can arouse me so much when you look like some wild animal that
want to eat its prey. Hehehehe…

So much enthusiasm for me…that’s what I loved from you L.
And I miss those eyes so badly now…

I miss those lips. Those sweet soft lips that very
skilled…and always know how I want to be kissed…and those lips always can make
me so agitated when we have verbal war…it never can bore me…you lips I mean…

And I miss your warmth too…your hug, your voice…and your
gentleness for me…because no one ever give that to me, or no one can ever give
that the same way you give me…you hug me with so much vigor but you still can
treat me like something so precious and you fill the coldness in my heart with
those pleasant warmth feeling that make my stomach full with butterfly.

L, everything you do make me feels alive…and when you
died…I don’t know how to survive…how to survive from the big hole that hovering
in my heart and the ache in my chest that killing me everyday…

I regret it…I hope I never know that warmth…I hope I
never know what it means to be alone…to feel lonely…I’m so fuking fine…until I
meet you, L…

Shit. Why I’m crying now…why my dying time feels so
fucking long…where those stupid shinigami when I need him…Quick…take my life
away…I can’t stand this feeling…

I can’t stand it…

L…you know what…I think I know now why you said I’m a
coward back then…

I’m coward because I’m afraid to love you so I choose to
hate you, and I’m afraid my mask will slip so I kill you, but in the end I’m
afraid to live alone without you so I let Near kill me…I even afraid to said
it…I never said those words…those three words you always say every time you
hold me…you always say it…you always say you love me…but I’m afraid to say it
back…and I’m more afraid to lied about it…because I’m afraid when I say it…even
as lies…I will truly love you…I kill you without telling you my true
feeling…but you still smiling…why L…why…

Why you still love me…why I have to kill you….why I have
to love you….why I have to meet you…

But…

I love you L. I love you so much. And I still love you
now. You are my first real love. And I think I can died peacefully by full
acknowledge my feeling and I hope…the god…the wind…the bird or anything…will
deliver it to you one day…my confession of love…hehehehe…

Oh…in the end…at least this stupid shinigami appear…I
think my time is come…

So my last wish is…I hope you’ll be happy in your next
life….if it exist…and never meet someone like me again…some one that loves you
so much…but still can kill you…

I wish your utmost happiness. Forever.

Review please!!!!

Hehehehe…I hope I don’t make it so clinche…
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