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Lessons of the Opposite Sex	By : Fanoffemdom14 Category: +M to R > Rozen Maiden Views: 1968 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I don't own Rozen Maiden. i also don't make any profit.

Chapter List
- 1-Lessons of the Opposite Sex
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Rozen Maiden

(Hey guys! New anime, new fanfic! Here’s a new approach I'm trying! So read and enjoy!)

                                                Lessons of the Opposite Sex

            It was morning time. Birds could be heard in the distance as they flew overhead. Tiny crickets could also be heard as they hopped near tiny bushes and what not. For some people, this is a time where they could wake up to a warm summer breeze, rub their eyes of the sleepies around them, and reflect on how life is treating them. For others, people could be going to sleep at this hour. This may be due to the fact that they have a long project to do, or maybe even enjoying their life to the point of drinking alcohol. Or… Some people could be waking up almost late to school.

            “Ahh! I’m gonna be late to school!” A young boy’s voice could be heard from inside a two story house. “Ugh! I have three talking dolls here and none of them have the courtesy to wake me up!” A young 13 year old male, Jun Sakurada, said as he scrambled around his room trying to find his uniform.

            “Hmm? Puny runt I’m trying to sleep!” A feminine voice said from a suitcase near his door. The first suitcase popped open and out appeared a long brunette hair doll. Dressed in green with a white bandana like thing wrapped around her head, she glared at Jun as he jumped around.

            “Not now Suiseiseki. I have to get to my school now! Final exams are coming up and if I'm late they are gonna hold me back!” Jun brushed off her insult as he jumped around trying to get his socks on. The day had finally come. Pretty soon he’d be well on his way into his first year of high school and away from his nightmare of a middle school. “Oh my god. I’m definitely ready for this test. My nights of studying have finally paid offffff!” Jun felt his body fall forward as a tiny pair of hands yanked his right sock backwards. Crash! His stomach collided with his carpet.

            “Ooops! You gotta be careful puny human!” Suiseiseki said before closing her suitcase back.

            Jun immediately jumped up. “Oh you’re gonna wish you hadn’t done that when I get back.” He snarled before jumping into his shoes. “Ok ok… I have 20 minutes to run to school. If I get breakfast at school then I should be ok..” He mumbled before grabbing his math book off his desk.

            The tiny sounds of metal clicking could be heard as another doll dressed in a rose red dress slowly rose out of it. “Jun. What is with this racket? Your master needs her sleep you know.” The small doll said as she gazed up at Jun. She had long blonde hair and had a serious aura surrounding her.

            “Shinku you won’t believe what today is. My final exams! If I pass this then I am going to high school. You have no idea how big this is for me!” He said as he threw on his backpack.

Shinku sighed before asking, “Jun…?”

“Yes?”

“I need a cup of tea. Please get to it.” She closed her eyes and her suitcase along with it.

“Grr.” He snarled lowly before lunging open his door. “I’ll be back later. I want this house the same way I leave it. got it? good!” Jun ran out, closed his door, and darted out of the house, closing the door behind him.

“Hm. What an ungrateful servant.” Shinku rose out of her suitcase and stepped out into his room. She gently brushed off her dress and stretched upwards.

“Ya know. We aren’t doing the Alice game anymore. He’s not technically our servant anymore.” Suiseiseki said before opening her case as well.

“Well it never hurts to have one.” She smiled before turning to the quiet third suitcase. “Hinaichigo wake up. It’s not wise to sleep through the day.” Shinku rapped on the mentioned suitcase.

“Ohh! Shinku should let Hina sleep!” A higher pitched girl doll whined and opened her suitcase. Out popped a third girl with blonde hair shorter than Shinku’s. She had a pink bow tying her hair in place and had a pink frilly dress on. “It’s still early morning!”

“That’s right. And Detective Kun-Kun comes on soon. So will you please come on and hurry up.” Shinku lectured.

“Hrmm fine!” Hina stepped out of her case and shut it. “Oh hello Suiseiseki!” Hina waved and smiled.

“Morning.” She replied.

“Hey, did you hear Jun last night? Is he alright?” Hina said putting her finger to her chin.

“Whatdya mean?” Suiseiseki asked.

“Well last night, I woke up early to get a glass of water and I saw Jun. I heard weird sounds so I looked up from my case…”

Flashback:

“Hmm.” Hina mumbled in her sleep. “No detective….Right behind you….no….no!” She shot straight up from her lying position. “Oh….Oh goodness it was only a dream!”

“Ohh man….”

Hina rubbed the back of her head and held her breath. “Jun?”

“Shi- Shinku….”a low voice was audible.



“Jun?” Hina peeked out of her case and looked up at the teenage figure.

“No Shinku don’t do that…” Jun mumbled in a low voice.

“Shinku?” She looked left and right before climbing out of her sleeping area. She landed with a soft thunk! And tip toed towards him.

“Shinku…” He moaned lowly.

As she approached him she could see his right hand jumping up and down. With a closer look she could see beads of sweat forming on his forehead. His breath was definitely coming in shorter gasps.

“Jun! Are you ok?” Hina exclaimed loudly.

“wha- umph!” He covered his mouth and jumped back from his rolling chair. “Hina?!” He whispered loudly. His face was a deep shade of red as he looked down at the miniature sized doll. Almost at once he realized his mistake…

“Jun is that…a snake?” She tilted her head to the side and stepped towards him. “Can I pet it?”

“NO! J-Just go back to bed!” Jun zipped up his sweat pants and jumped back into his bed. He yanked up the covers and turned his back to the dumbfounded doll.

“But Juuuuunnnnnn…” She called his name in a whiny fashion and climbed into his bed. “Why’d you name it Shinku? Why do you look so tired? Why’d you turn away?”

Jun pulled the covers up over himself and picked her up. “Look it’s none of your concern. I just needed to relieve some stress before tomorrow. That’s not a crime is it? Now go to bed!” He placed her softly on the floor before turning back around.

End Flashback

“He looked so nervous! What’d you do to him Shinku?” Hina said with a smile still on her face.

An awkward silence covered the room. Suiseiseki’s and Shinku’s face was a deep red as the awkward memory flooded their mind. Jun was….calling her name….but why?

“U-Umm Shinku?” Suiseiseki whispered.

“Wh-Why was he…..calling my name?” Shinku whispered aloud.

“What if his snake was dangerous? What if it bites him? We have to help him when he gets back!” Hinaichigo exclaimed aloud.

An even more dense silence covered the room.

“U-Uhhh…” Shinku stuttered quietly.

“Eh whats the big deal? He was probably just doing what other humans do at that age.” Suiseiseki waved her hand at the two before turning her back to them.

“Eh? What do they do Suiseiseki?” Hina asked.

“Tch..” The green doll turned around. “Ok! Well I don’t know exactly but…Shinku! What do they do?”

Shinku, who had been silent all this time, turned towards her. “Ok I don’t know either! But it sounds so weird! He was rubbing his “snake”.” She made air quotes with her fingers. “And calling my name! What on earth could this mean?” She asked aloud.

“Shinku! Suiseiseki! Hinaichigo!” Nori, Jun’s older sister, called from the hallway. “I’m going to my tennis match now!” She opened the door to Jun’s room and waved to the three dolls. “Listen guys, I have a regional match outside of town. So I’ll be back tomorrow night! So tell Jun for me will you? Oh and do you guys need anything?” She smiled.

The three girls looked at each other.

“Should we ask her? She is his older sister so she should know best.” Suiseiseki whispered to Shinku.

“Seems like a good plan, but we can’t just ask her willy nilly. We should approach this with a logical meaning and then see if-“

“Nori! Jun has a snake! I saw it! He was petting it and he named it after Shinku!” Hinaichigo said in an upbeat manner.

“J-J-Jun?” Nori squinted her eyes down at them a sweat drop rolled down the side of her head.

“Yea! I saw Jun last night looking at a book and petting it! He was making weird breathing noises and he was calling its name! I asked if he was ok and he jumped out of his chair! I caught a look at it too! I thought snakes were bigger but…it was so cool!” Hinaichigo exclaimed without knowing the meaning of her words.

Nori gasped. “Hina! When did you see this?”

“Last night! I remember it so clearly!”

“Ah….Ah…” The color from Nori’s face drained. “U-Umm Do-Do you guys know about uhhh…uhhh…” She stuttered and bit her lip.

“What’s wrong Nori? I don’t see any color on your face…” Hina asked innocently.

Nori squealed and ran away from the door.

Shinku raised an eyebrow “What’s wrong with her?”

Suiseiseki shrugged. “I only know as much as you so…”

Hina tilted her head and shrugged. “Hina doesn’t know either.”

“Umm here!” The trio turned back to the door when the sound of footsteps could be heard running back. Nori came back breathing heavily as she slouched against the doorway. “J-Just read that! Now I really have to go! Tell Jun where I am when he gets back! I feel bad that I couldn’t tell him in time.. But… Ok gotta go! Bye!” She pulled the door shut and a few seconds later the sound of the front door could be heard opening, then closing.

Shinku flipped the book back upwards and glazed over the title mentally.

“What what? What does it say Shinku?” Hinaichigo asked.

Suiseiseki scoffed and began with, “I bet it’s something lame along the lines of-.”

“All….All About…..All About Sex.” Shinku’s eyes were wide open as Suiseiseki rushed up to her shoulder.

“No way! It can’t be!” She gasped as a heavy blush formed on her face.

“What? What’s sex?” Hinaichigo ran up to the book. “Oh I bet sex is about magical sunshine! Or maybe it’s a new term that Kun-Kun uses! Or maybe it’s-.”

“Stop!” Shinku raised her hand. “This is a serious matter.”

“Why’s it so serious Shinku?” Suiseiseki asked.

“Erm…” Shinku’s face lit up dark red as she flipped the cover of the book to the side. “Let’s stop asking questions! Let’s just read this and it’ll answer our questions for us.” Shinku sighed and inadvertently skipped the table of contents. “Let’s see…Chapter 1…. Male Masturbation?!?” Shinku covered her mouth and stepped back.

“What what? Lemme see!” Hina looked over her shoulders at the title. “It sounds icky. Flip the page!” Hina ducked down and turned the page. “Huh?” She raised her tiny eyebrow. “Ohhh! That looks like the snake that Jun had! Only a lot bigger! Look at it!” She grabbed Suiseiseki’s hand and pointed down.

“H-Hina….That’s not a snake…” Shinku skimmed down the page beside the picture. “Ummm…According to this….It’s a…It’s a…”

“A penis!” Suiseiseki gasped and shut her eyes. “Ohh this is so wrong! We shouldn’t be looking at this! Detective Kun-Kun is on right no-.”

Shinku quickly shot a look to the green dressed doll. “It can wait. This is more important.” She whispered and flipped the page…”Umm…This page says….That men get pleasure out of rubbing their…penis…up and down…” Shinku lowered her voice as she finished her sentence.

“How is that possible? It’s just like rubbing skin right?” Suiseiseki asked.

“Ok ok! Next chapter! Next chapter please!” Shinku pushed her hand away and began flipping past the pages.

Hina gasped then started her sentence with, “Huh? So Jun got pleasure out of rubbing his-.”

“Hush!” Shinku placed her hand over the child like doll’s mouth.

“Ok ok! Here’s chapter 2!” Suiseiseki backed up from the page after reading it to herself. “It’s called the….the…” Suiseiseki looked away. “The Vagina.”

“The what?” Hina lost the smile on her face as she looked up at the other girl.

Shinku kneeled down and read the page aloud. “The vagina is a woman’s genitals. It’s almost the same as the male’s genitals, but it has different organs. Every woman has one.” Shinku gasped and placed her hand on her stomach.

“Every woman has one? Does Hina have one too?” She asked as she looked down the length of her legs.

Suiseiseki blushed before saying. “Yes! It says every woman has one! Hina! You, me, and Shinku are females! So that means we have one!”

Hina gasped. “But…We are just dolls! Maybe the book is mistaken!”

“No… No it’s not. Suiseiseki is right.” Shinku wiped her eyes. “We are women nonetheless. We have one alright?” She sighed and read down further. “Oh…Oh my god!” She backed up from the book. “The women perform masturbation by rubbing the clitoris.. Usually at the top of the vagina…”

“Oh my god! Why does Nori own a book like this?!” Suiseiseki exclaimed.

Hina turned to Shinku. “Ooohhhh! Do you think Nori does this too?”

“How should me or Shinku know? Besides that still doesn’t answer our question!”

“To teach immature kids like you a lesson.”

Crash! The window’s to Jun’s room was broken open as black feathers began to pour into the room.

“Suigintou.” Shinku rose off of her knees and stood up and at attention at the flood of feathers.

“Ah! Why is Suigintou here? The game is over!” Suiseiseki pulled out her magic watering can and watched as the white haired doll floated into the room. Her black wings were visible as was her blue undershirt. Two upside down crosses were the first things Shinku noticed as the uninvited guest made her way into the house.

“Suigintou! You are not welcome here! Please make your way outta this house!” Shinku commanded.

Suigintou merely chuckled as the three dolls surrounded her. “My My…Who said I wanted to prepare a fight? Seems like assumption making may be your forte.” She said.

Shinku could feel her awareness lower as the taller doll made her way closer to them. “Right. What do you mean by “teach us immature kids a lesson”?”

Suigintou smiled. “You kids will never understand sex unless you’re given a clear demonstration.” She placed her hands on her hips.

Shinku exhaled. “How long have you been eavesdropping?”

Suigintou chuckled. “Not so long as to hear young kids freaking out over real life nature! This is sex. It happens everywhere, everyday.” She informed them.

Suiseiseki dismissed her watering can. “Wait….How do YOU know about the human nature?”

“I am after all the number one Rozen Maiden made. With the best knowledge, I can teach you anything.”

Shinku glared up at her. “Wait. There is a catch. I just know, what’s in it for you?”

Suigintou simply smiled and said, “When does your medium get back Shinku?”

“Jun? He’s at school so…Maybe a few hours perhaps? Why?”

“Hmph.” Suigintou mumbled and followed up with, “Ok. You guys wanna learn about sex the right way?”

Hina gasped. “Yes! Suigintou is nice! Yes please show us!”

Shinku hushed her. “There is something stopping me from agreeing. Now you agree not to hurt him right?”

Suigintou rolled her eyes. “Define hurt.”

Shinku stepped towards her. “I don’t want to see a single scar, bruise, or scratch on his body. Understand?”

Suigintou smirked. “Oh Shinku! How untrusting! Of course! But let me ask you a question first. Will you allow me to use persuasive non violent force?”

Shinku nodded. “It depends on what it is.”

Suigintou nodded. “We’ll have to wait for a bit. What’s his name? Jun if I remember right? Of course. Leave it to me girls. After today, You’ll be informed and he’ll be pleased.”

Suiseiseki pondered her thoughts for a second. “Wait. It’s weird. Why are you helping us? Have you not remembered the events of the Alice game?”

Suigintou sighed. “Listen lets dismiss those evil thoughts. They won’t do anything for us ladies.”

Shinku eyed her. “What did you have in mind?”

The white haired doll grinned. “Listen up, cause this is gonna be said once, and only once.”

8888888888888888888888888888888888

            “Hello? Shinku? Hina? I’m home!” Jun shouted as he walked in. “Guys?” He kicked his shoes off and ran up the stairs. “Shinku! Guess how well I did on my exams! I thought I did pretty well!” He pushed his door open. “Guys? Guys! Is anyone here? Ahh where did those dolls go?”

            “Hello…Jun-kun..”

            Jun’s breath caught in his throat as that familiar deep feminine voice invaded his ears. “Who are you? Show yourself!” He said as he looked around. His thoughts stopped as multiple black feathers fell in front of his face. “Eh?” He looked up and immediately saw the intruding Suigintou hanging from his ceiling.

            “Long time, no see Jun….”

            He gasped as the figure dropped towards him, engulfing both of them into a world of blackness.

(It’s just chapter 1. So read review and what not! Criticism needed! Hope you enjoyed!)
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Lessons of the Opposite Sex