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Reviews for Pleasure Slave

By : Capitalist

From Scorpinac on June 29, 2007
Wow, you're cranking these out fast!

So, he's actually thinking about making a break for it? Somehow I don't think Sakura's gonna want to leave anymore, not if it means never seeing her fiancee again. This is gonna get real sticky real fast, I can tell. And at last the Cards are mentioned...sort of. Well, definitely looking forward to #38! Laters!
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From vix111 on June 29, 2007
O_____O
Oh, the Irony!! Clow doesn't count in the bet, now does he? Because he just told Touya, but, and here I'm quoting you, Touya being to Touya won't believe him or heed to his words. Now, Touya won't run away from the castle with Sakura. I have the feeling she wont let him. If he does run away, he will run away from Yue and the truth of the magic, And Yue obviously hasnt compared Touya to the stag, well at least not consciously.
The man that looked like Touya? Sounds like Fujiutaka to me. I just cant help of thinking of him, after all that story with clow/eriol/fujitaka. I doubt its eriol, but I guess it is a higher possibility than Fujitaka. Clow is sneaky as always, he says he has the urge to "fix it" but he won't bother Yue; still he is bothering Touya, and that is meddling and fixing to me XD
I've been visiting this site once a day since the chapter 36, since you are updating frequently. I would appreciate it however, if you feel like you wont update in a long time, to let us know in an author note, so we dont go crazy visiting this site daily ^_^
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From ANON - Samadz on June 29, 2007
fuck.yes.
/freaks out!!!!
i almost shrieked out-loud when i realized it was Clow. holy freaking cow. now i'm not gonna be able to sleep tonight ;_; Thanks Capitalist, thanks.

i'm sure the stag will play a bigger role later, right?

and who was the guy that Yue was talking to that Touya couldn't see? could it have been the same man who kidnapped Sakura in the very beginning? my bets are on that.

this story rocks so hard! >.
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From inulover16 on June 27, 2007
I just wanted to say that after reading this fic for a very long time that I still love it no matter how long it may take to update. I must say recently that you have been doing such a great job. Well thanks for this great fic and I hope that it never ends. Keep up the great work!!!
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From midnightfox on June 27, 2007
.............................. O.O Wow. That was mind blowing! I wasn't expecting Kero to show up @_@ way to keep me on the edge of my seat *claps*
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From ANON - periodness on June 26, 2007
been reading this for quite sometime now. if i remember correctly.. you promised or rather said, that you will end this likely before the fic's third birthday.. which is.. august 2007. right? or wrong? just a thought.

this is the only reason i go to aff.net and im so thankful you've been updating faster than the usual.

Pleasure slave is like watching a soap opera... or reading harry potter. you've started it.. you've been reading/watching it for a long time now.. it became a habit... and all you want to know now.. is the ending. you have a VERY vague idea on how it will end.. but you cannot just simply digest that, that is the ending.

lemon in its finest.

do continue you're work... you are like a TOUYA in our cold YUE-ish fanfic life. you came into our boring fanfic-reading life... and give it a nice twist... and a push... and pull... harder!!!
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From ANON - Mooglepies on June 25, 2007
Well.

I suppose the onus is on me to finally review (I have in fact been reading since the very first chapter; I am shockingly reticent when it comes to contacting people online, or even giving my details to websitesf), seeing as you've let anonymous reviews back in.

So, to business! I have years of silence to make up for so I suppose I better pay my debts.

I've followed this since it's first steps on this site, and I've been consitently impressed at both the style and depth of your writing; never have I felt that you've either spent too long describing something, nor have I thought that something hasn't been explained enough (unless it was purposely kept secret as part of the plot). I've not found any glaring spelling or grammatical inaccuracies (although lets face it, there are a lot of chapters I've not read in some time), and while the Americanisms might irk slightly (Brit over here folks), they don't detract from my enjoyment (I'd be a pretty unhappy person if it did, given the amount of written material that comes from Yankland, as I affectionately term it).

Your characters have been well thought out, introduced well, and make an impression unique to this story, resembling but never being cookie-cutter impressions of their manga/anime selves. Their speech has been well thought out, it never seems wooden, and yet it's never overdone. That says much.

The plot has, to my eyes, been well planned, and you obviously know what you're doing. It's good enough that it does what most stories on this site fail to do, which I will come onto shortly.

On that note, I suppose as this is supposed to be constructive criticism, I better do some criticising hadn't I?

I'll start this off by saying I'm a big (understatement) fan of the Tomoyo/Sakura pairing. This may seem slightly irrelevant, but please bear with me. During the last chapter (Competition) you did what to my eyes seems slightly unfair (both to some of your readers and to one of your characters). You have (again, to my eyes) killed off a pairing; one which you had painstakingly cultivated from the first chapters. While this isn't necessarily a bad thing (in fact you deserve praise for having the guts to do it), it's more the manner in which you did it that I think needs criticising; you've (again, and I sound like a parrot, to my eyes) you've cut it out completely; no chance of it happening, no parole, no stay of execution, yadda yadda. In doing this you've potentially lost some readers, the ones who were here for the (extremely well written) Sakura/Tomoyo smut. Some of your readers will certainly have only been here for the smut (This is adultfanfiction.net, lets not kid ourselves and pretend that the primary reason we first came here was NOT for the smut).

It also seems a little unfair to poor Tomoyo (again, that I can feel empathy for your characters speaks volumes about your writing skill) that with all that's happened to her that she's lost her only love interest. I think it would have been better to at least leave the door ajar, if not completely open, that way the reader can still use their imaginations to come up with scenarios where Tomoyo can still "Win" so to speak. But oh well. This is your story, and by all means, run in whichever direction you feel you should.

I myself had something of an internal conflict as to whether I was going to continue reading; on the one hand my main reason for reading has been removed; as a pairing, Tomoyo and Sakura fit the best of all the characters (again, opinion), and I like to see Tomoyo get the love she deserves (again, opinion). On the other hand I wanted some closure to the plot; all of those mysteries and intricacies that you've woven. I did in fact come to the conclusion that I would continue for the plot; the pairings, while no longer of any real interest to me are deep enough that I'll keep going (although I may glaze over the Sakura/Syaoran sex scene). Human nature unfortunately dictates that there will be some people that will stop reading. A pity, but maybe those aren't the readers that you want anyway? Just a thought.

So there you have it; my thoughts, musings, whatever you wish to call them. Take them to heart, ignore them, do whatever you wish.

If you want to chat about this (although I am sure you have far better things to occupy your time), feel free to email or msn me (email is my msn address), bearing in mind the absurd amount of spaces and such I've put in the email field.

All of the above said, I enjoy your story, and am impressed at the skill and motivation you have shown (glossing over that long gap between chapters that you had) to this, and I look forward to reading what you produce in the future.

Yours,

Mooglepies
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From ANON - Aya on June 25, 2007
OH MY GOD!!!! I love this story! the romance and the intrique! *smiles* I have just found this story and have not left it alone for about 2 or 3 nights straight! Please continue with it! *hugs you and gives you a cookie* I give you kudos for this story! I have read many Card Captor stories but this one is by far the best. And I love Yue and Touya being together! I wonder...will Touya ever just say that he loves Yue back? >.>
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From lilian on June 23, 2007
Thanks for the new chapter! I really liked the portrayal of Keroberos. And I think those things that are running around wild that Kero and Yue have to take care of are the Cards! Knowing that this chapter is called Harbinger, I wonder whether they're going to wreak havoc if it really is the Cards, or whatever else might happen too. And maybe Touya and Sakura will show some of their magic as well.

Really, thanks for updating! I usually check this section of the site everyday for an update, and for awhile I felt pretty useless because I checked the first day or first week right after an update knowing full well that the likelihood of something being there was small, but still doing it out of habit. Now I can check and really expect a chapter to be there! It's great, I'm happy and excited that the muses are being good :)

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From ANON - pockygirl on June 23, 2007
squee! much love for the kero-cameo, especially since he's in his unlocked form and not the dinky teddybear with wings. ^^

it's weird, how often you're updating now- i got used to a couple months between updates, not a couple weeks.
I adore a good AU, and they're even better when they have plot. I've very much enjoyed watching the characters develop in this, and it looks like it won't be done anytime soon.
*gives this the goodfic stamp*
~Pocky
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From ANON - Amet on June 23, 2007
Hey I really love ur fics, cant follow cont. but I m keeping track. Seriously doh this chap cracked me. Touya's behaviour on missin Yue was lovely. XD I so... luv him. And as u mentioned I bet on Yue to confess his feeling first, in fact, i had thought dat be4 but never thought to mention it.
Keroberos was as usual big mouth and big stomach. Glad to see dat Sakura friended him. The axe scene was really funny, both 'bout Toya and Lee. I love to read humour even in angsty fics, esp. in angsty fics. As in Nekojita's fics.

Lookin forward to more of ur updates. :crosses fingers:
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From ANON - BillyTheCad on June 23, 2007
YAY, KEROBEROS IS HERE!

Er... sorry. God, I love that kitty cat. Anyway, great chapter! I loved the interactions between Kero and Sakura, and Kero and Yue.

They're fighting the cards, right? The cards that they're trying to keep away from the towns, to protect them, I suppose. When Yue came in and Touya said he smelled 'musty,' I'm thinking perhaps Sand, or Earthy? Yay! So much goodness in this chapter! It all makes me so happy. Fanart is coming your way, just so you know! So much in this chapter really stands out to me... must... draw!
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From ANON - aynia on June 23, 2007
Keroberos made an appearance, yay! And although it was a bit short a visit I'm sure he will reappear when things get tight. He now knows the situation and even befriended Sakura, I think that will prove to be important later on. Concerning the latest revelations, I guess they're hunting the Clow card spirits - it would make sense since in CLAMP's original story at least Keroberos (I am not sure about Yue) was a guardian of the Clow book containing the cards. It's just a guess though. I love this story and I'm looking forward to the next chapter - as I always do. ;)
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From ANON - Lady M on June 23, 2007
Hooray! Kero! I am guessing the things runnign around in the forest are clow cards... which is neat. I sure hope Sakura gets to show em how its done!
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From Scorpinac on June 23, 2007
Oh, yeah, liked how you mentioned Yamazaki and Chiharu, poor boy's never gonna be believed...unless Sakura happens to come for a visit riding upon a large winged lion, hehheh... Sorry... Well, then, the only regulars not yet mentioned, as far as I can recall, are Naoko(don't even begin to know how she could be worked in), Eriol, Spinner, and Nakuru/Ruby. As previously stated, can't wait to see what happens next. Laters.
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