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Reviews for Primary Gain

By : anlaaria

From ANON - Severt on March 11, 2009
Whoops. Forgot it would hide my email. Oh well. Either ignore this or let me know somehow.
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From ANON - Severt on March 11, 2009
Hey. Dunno if you're going to read these, but there aren't an obscene amount of them yet, so I suppose you don't have too many to dig through. First of all, let me just say that my reviewing this is kind of surprising me. I come to aff.net primarily to read the most hilarious, disgusting shit possible, and my mental relationship with Code Geass is kind of... complex. (It's less interesting than I'm making it sound.) Anyway, I return to the Code Geass section for weird cripple porn and overblown BDSM stories, because I find them funny - in execution, concept, and in relation to the show. But I'm actually enjoying this, which so far has only happened a couple of times on this whole site.

For one thing, the story isn't an excuse for the porn, which itself is minimally awkward. I can't speak much to characterization, except to say that sometimes in AUs, including some I've enjoyed, the situation seems so far removed from the original canon that the characters, while actualized and well-portrayed, might as well be original. I could be wrong - someone with a better knowledge of Code Geass canon would certainly know better than me - but I don't get that sense here. As different as the situation is our main characters pretty much seem like themselves (Kallen is the one I know least about, but as entertaining as she's been here I don't have reason to complain).

The only problems I see so far are relatively minor. There's the occasional typo, of course, which could easily be fixed by proofreading, but that doesn't bother me. I rarely proofread diligently myself. Otherwise, there are some little grammatical weirdnesses, mostly surrounding quotations and speech, that bother me a little. Your technical use of the language is mostly pretty good, but occasionally in dialogue-heavy sections things pop out at me that take me out of it. It's not like the story will suck if you don't fix them, so I won't be a dick and write it all out here when I've already constructed a huge wall of text saying pretty much nothing. If you're interested in a little friendly advice, feel free to shoot me an email! I'll look forward to the next installment.
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From ANON - Anoni on March 11, 2009
OMFG! I usually don't leave review here on aff.net... but this fic is totally worth it! I'm loving it to pieces and it's making me feel so many things that I just can't describe.

The story is wonderful and I hope to see the next chapter soon, just because this cliffhanger was very mean.

Thank you for writting such a wonderful story!!! *fangirls you*
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From ANON - Anon on March 11, 2009
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
Holy shit.
Cliffhanger? y u do dis?
I loved the bit with Kallen. Haha.
Although, admittedly, I enjoyed the entire chapter. BUT NOW YOU HAVE ME SITTING ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT.
more soon plz.
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From capnknuckles on March 11, 2009
I'm quite sincere in saying you write the greatest Code Geass fanfic! Please update this soon!! (Is gonna keep checking until the next update because of your evil cliff hanger) You write the best scenes...gah just keep writing please!!
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From shamera on March 11, 2009
...I'm not usually one to leave reviews on aff because I'd rather leave them on LJ o even ff.net because it's easier and more... interactive, I suppose. But having just got home and seeing a new chapter up here, I didn't want to check anywhere else when I could already read the newest chapter here. And having just read it... well, my head is still buzzing from this chapter.
I personally think this is one of the best Code Geass fanfiction out on the net. I thought it the moment I finished the first chapter, and then the second chapter turned out better (but I figured I was biased because I actually really like Schneizel/Lelouch), but now... wow. All through the chapter, from Suzaku finding out he was taking down the Britannians to Lelouch's explaination on knights and Charles's statement, and... just everything. Even the Suzaku/Kallen scene was beyond amazing. And the last scene just makes me need to know what happens next. I have all these suspicions and situations that keep growing in my mind, and it's been a long while since a fanfiction could get me so speculative.
So yes. I find this story absolutely amazing and will end this here so I can send it before I change my mind to reword things and dull my review down.
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From ANON - Velvetina on March 10, 2009
You left it there?! Noooo. I want to know what happens next. I neeed to know. I am literally flailing with curiosity right now because this fic is so well written that I just want to keep reading it. I love your Lelouch and Suzaku. They are so well written. Please more soon!
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From ANON - Masks- on March 05, 2009
FFFFFFFUUUUUU- this was more than I could have hoped for in a second chapter. I'm so relieved that you didn't drop the ball, and in fact I apologize that the thought ever crossed my mind. You are amazing at this. There are so many reasons that I love this chapter. Should I try to list them all? I'll go in reverse.

Lelouch's love for Suzaku. OMG, I'm not the only one these days who believes in such a thing as platonic love? Of course I can't wait for those two to start fucking like bunnies, but pop culture is saturated with romantic love, so I no longer find it as exciting nor touching as I think I'm expected to. You might be surprised to know how many people I have spoken to who are confused by the idea of loving another person who they are not close to or do not know well, especially in a non-sexual way. Seeing my current favorite pairing engaged in such a relationship is delightful.

I'm happy that we finally get to learn what's been eating Suzaku. Seeing a bit of Lelouch's past was a treat, too.

Bradley being gay. I giggled. Ditto for Nunnally dating Rolo. Too much fun.

Can't forget to mention the sex. Tasteful, and intruigingly non-linear. Although I (perhaps unreasonably) dislike Schneizel, so far I am pleased with his role in the story, and am interested to see where it leads.

Suzaku OD-ing on the sleeping pills was so clever. It's good to see a writer with such tight control of their own story.

I can't remember the last time I had so much fun reading a fanfiction. How long are you thinking this will be, anyway? Your next update can't come soon enough for me, but of course I wouldn't want you to rush things. Just don't leave me hanging; a story this finely crafted cannot be left unfinished!
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From ANON - Velvetina on March 04, 2009
Oh my word wow! That was just stunning and totally broke my heart. Lelouch is such a complex and interesting character and I just loved that insight into him. And Suzaku **wibbles** poor mistreated boy, I can understand the need to hug him tight. Really really well written and am looking forward to more.
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From ANON - Anon on March 02, 2009
This is wonderful. I'm sorry I don't have anything constructive to say, but it's absolutely wonderful. Really. I normally don't like AUs, and I almost passed by this one, but I'm so glad I decided to read it. I can't wait to read more.

errgghhh when Lelouch was holding Suzaku as he was crying, I thought I was going to start crying, too. It killed me. In a good way.
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From Eline on March 02, 2009
I admit I was intrigued when I saw the incest warning for the first chapter and was wondering what that entailed. I do like Schneizel/Lelouch and the fact that *both* Suzaku and Lelouch are damaged survivors of abuse in this fic made it very interesting indeed. I liked how you portrayed Lelouch's attempts at connecting with someone. Some typos but otherwise a great chapter!
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From ANON - Anon on February 20, 2009
Normally I would leave a review that consists of my thoughts on what I've read but every so often I'll come across a story that kills my brain. That said, MOAR PLZ.
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From o0checkmate0o on February 05, 2009
This fanfiction is just amazing, really D: I enjoyed this chapter far beyond words and was completely captivated by not only the expert and very interesting portrayals of Suzaku and Lelouch's personalities in this AU setting, but the AU setting itself has left me very intrigued. I honestly never would have thought of them in these professions, but the way you've set it up is really a joy to read about. I love the tension I can really feel between them, or more like, that Suzaku feels towards Lelouch XD A major problem that I find with AUs is that they fail to maintain the depth of the histories and personalities of the characters. Even in fanfiction that uses the same exact storyline, a lot of it can be shallow and tends to completely miss all the little quirks of the characters, all the unspoken parts that say far more than what's actually said.

n__n; I'm sorry if my gushing makes you feel a bit awkward. I sincerely enjoyed this first chapter very much, so much so that while I usually don't review, I was almost desperate to give you one and let you know just how much I'll be looking forward to the next installment. I really want to see where it goes. I suppose I've been a bit dissatisfied with the majority of the Code Geass fanfiction, so it's wonderful to find one I really enjoy~ It wasn't stated in your summary, but I was hoping that eventually Lelouch and Suzaku would have something of a relationship? While I am a complete pervert (why else would I browse this site, hm~?) when I'm so interested in the story itself I can do without the physical intimacy (although it's still loved, don't get me wrong). But I think that a relationship, whether you write out the physical portion or not, would be electric between them with the way you've set it up. I would really enjoy it~

Of course I'll still probably diligently and eagerly keep up with your chapters even if they don't get together. It would just be a lovely bonus if they did =P I'll stop going on now, and close this off by wishing you luck on this story. I really look forward to reading more and eagerly await your next chapter. :3
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From ANON - Heidi on February 04, 2009
I have to say, wow. The story really hooked me up, the characters were amazing, reading Lelouch&Suzaku interaction was like watching an intense tennis game, with them passing the ball back and forth. You make it seem like a psychiatrist is really Lelouch's vocation, and maybe it is^ how he just loves to mess with others' heads. Maybe it makes me a pervert, but I think he's sexy as hell when he plays his little mind games. And Suzaku is, well, Suzaku. I don't know who I love more. Both of them, together. ^_^
Inc on the story stands for Incest, is it between Suzaku and his father? Or Lelouch and...? Well, he does seem to have an older brother complex in the series...
I wonder if you are going to somehow fit Lelouch's royal lienage into the story, or Lamperouge is his real name here? Just curious.
I really hope Suzaku didn't poison himself with those pills. All in all, the story is great, will look forward to the next chapter. ^_^
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From ANON - Anon on February 03, 2009
Hi, I'd like to let you know how much I love this AU. Although Lelouch's characterization is still a bit generic (I think that's understandable, considering he is playing a role), Suzaku's characterization is already very clear and awesome. I really enjoy how freely you are writing this, keeping the characters true to themselves in spite of the completely different scenario. This is probably one of the most original CG fics I've read in a long time. The story and the focus on the characters's relationship is extremely gripping and I was actually sorry when the chapter was over. In other words, I want more. Much more. And I will be waiting for your update and cry tears of pain if you give up on this project.I love your ironic, fast style. I also love how you show more than you tell, and the original take on the whole cg universe.

Congratulations. And please, do continue. :)
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