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Learning to Land	By : Suteishichic Category: Prince of Tennis/Tennis no Ohjisama > General Views: 11419 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Prince of Tennis (Tennis no Ohjisama), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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Learning to Land by Suteishichic. Chapter One Hundred Ten ~ Inui
Warnings: Yaoi, Love, Angst, Fluff, and Lots of Sex. Some kink. You've been warned ;)
Disclaimer: Nope not mine. Still in my dreams. ;)
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Despite his resolve, Inui found he was quite... (truth be told, Inui could not find the proper word to summarize precisely how he felt about Kaidoh. Taken was his first choice, but on second thought, Inui decided taken sounded too much as if he felt enraptured by the freshman. Really, to say he was quite taken by Kaidoh would not do. That might seem to indicate Inui had strong, romantic romantic for the shy younger boy, and this simply could not be true. After several moments of searching and rejecting other choices that also did not seem to fit, Inui had to admit even with his sizable vocabulary he was unable to choose the exact right word for how he felt. Annoyed and putting the matter aside for the moment to be dissected and analyzed later, Inui settled on at least admitting he was rather...) ...impressed with Kaidoh.
After their "session" together Inui began to dress. When he glanced back he couldn't help but admire the view. The freshman remained naked in his bed. Kaidoh looked at Inui in a way that made the freshman appear rather...rumpled and disheveled but in a most sexy and approachable manner. Inui turned away to dress simply because he had to admit, Kaidoh in his bed like that looked quite adorable.

Adorable and intriguing. He had an odd thought that Kaidoh like that in his bed was something Inui could get used to.

And thoughts like this could not be allowed.

The problem was Kaidoh like that made Inui contemplate doing things he found he was unprepared to contemplate doing. He was also not prepared to think of all the things it made him think of. The possibilities and potentials portended were akin to the strange expression of opening up a new can of worms. A strange expression and yet, suddenly a new can of worms began to look beguiling.

There were other issues and things it made Inui think of. Things like, in all honesty, Inui never enjoyed sex or even kissing someone without feeling at least some romantic attachment to his partner. And either because Kaidoh was looking so adorable and needy or because of Inui's inability to separate sex and his emotions, Inui found to surprise he was entertaining feelings and thoughts of a romantic nature involving himself and Kaidoh Kaoru.

Inui quickly decided the wisest course of action would be to separate from the freshman and sort out these unwanted and unplanned emotions on his own. He knew that the most fair thing to do was to think this through away from the freshman because after all, Inui had feelings for Tezuka. Long standing feelings. Didn't he? He should not be thinking of Kaidoh or anyone else at all.

And regardless of his own stray thoughts, Inui had to keep in mind that data did not lie. Clearly, Kaidoh had feelings for Oishi.

Why Oishi? What could Kaidoh possibly find attractive about...?

This was not good. Just thinking about Kaidoh's feelings for someone else had Inui feeling bewildered and out of sorts. Inui discovered he had to suppress another horrible side-effect to his having some feelings for Kaidoh, because he now felt strong irrational jealousy towards Oishi. Feeling jealous was not new, Inui would admit even if only to himself he felt jealous of Fuji for some time now. However, what surprised and alarmed Inui was how quickly his feelings of jealousy turned from Fuji to Oishi. And how strong these jealous, irrational urgings to make Kaidoh his were. A part of himself seriously started calculating the data and probabilities of if Inui returned to bed with Kaidoh right now, what he could do and how long it would take to make the freshman forget Oishi forever. Inui began to rush to put on his clothes before Kaidoh noticed his returning erection or before he acted rashly.

He knew the freshman would have no idea of his inner turmoil but as he finished dressing, Inui noticed the freshman still in his bed (and still looking temptingly vulnerable and in need of more kissing). Kaidoh lay there staring at him and seemed to hesitate. The freshman sort of was frozen and looked at Inui as if stunned. For a half-second, Inui irrationally wondered if Kaidoh could somehow read his thoughts. Dismissing this as paranoia, Inui handed Kaidoh some of his clothes to wear home to indicated the freshman should dress himself. This way Inui could expedite walking Kaidoh home. Afterwards, on his way back home Inui planned on sorting through all the data and on figuring out his next step once he was able to sort through all this objectively. Inui shook his head no at the impossibility of it all, the inconclusive data, and at his own bad timing.

Up until then, just before Inui discovered he had these stray feelings for Kaidoh, everything had been going along rather splendidly. Even better than Inui initially anticipated and for once, he was rather glad for merely having inaccurate data. Initially Inui worried that perhaps Kaidoh's inexperience might hinder their sharing some sexual pleasure. Happily this was not the case at all. Not that given the minimal data Inui had on the freshman could ever predict how erotic a sexually curious and turned on Kaidoh Kaoru was.

Not even in Inui's fantasies... Not that Inui ever actually had many... Or even any fantasies about the freshman before. At least not any one in particular Inui could recall. Not specifically. Certainly nothing one could categorize as a full-fledged or fleshed-out fantasy. No, it was more like Inui would be occasionally watching Kaidoh or thinking about him and once in a blue moon he might have a few... minor... minuscule... random... idle... musings. That was all.

It was the same way Inui would happen to... oh that little hiss of a pleasured sigh as Inui ran his tongue along the freshman's teeth... casually notice... such sexy and surprisingly soft to kiss lips...anyone male or female who happened to be particularly attractive...when Kaidoh moans in pleasure his voice sounds husky and so hot... and as a fertile male of the human race it was only natural for Inui to have fleeting thoughts... and the oh so seductive the way Kaidoh's legs wrapped so naturally around Inui's body when they lay like... of a sexual nature. Really, it was nothing... Kaidoh's eager hands reached out to touch more of Inui's skin and pull them closer together... just a few... gentle licks and soft tender kisses along his sensitive neck and jawline... lust-driven momentary... that thrilled smile whenever Inui praised him... primal urges. Nothing more and of course... his dazed look of contentment just after he came... thoughts of this type... his kiss-swollen lips and the intense gaze of hazel eyes following Inui's every move... were common among men at Inui's age and it was... Inui wanted him and if they stayed in bed together any longer Inui just might have taken things too far... well it was... Inui next would have kissed his way down the freshman's perfect body knowing Kaidoh would enjoy it... natural and completely normal... knowing Kaidoh wanted more he would take the freshman's erection in his mouth while continuing to move his fingers inside him... it really didn't mean anything... stretching him and preparing him for when Inui entered that tight hot passage into his perfect body...

Kaidoh Kaoru was just attractive... and he wanted Inui in that moment--Inui was sure it was only him Kaidoh wanted right then and not Oishi... with a nice body... and in that moment Inui was only thinking of Kaidoh... a beautiful smile... of being with Kaidoh... the most adorable laugh... of making love to Kaidoh and no one else... and... they both wanted to... truly, all it proved was that Kaidoh was an attractive person... Inui had to stop because he wasn't sure of the long term implications of these racing thoughts, feelings, and desires...so he just tabled the entire matter for another time... and really didn't it just mean if one based their findings purely on well documented data regarding normal hormone levels in an average teenager that Inui was just a normal red-blooded male?

It was exhausting to contemplate so Inui resolved to stop. Stop thinking until he was alone again and could get a little perspective. Until he could think clearly without all these... hot little sighs and hisses turning into moans... annoying... full lips and soft kisses... distractions.

Annoyed with himself, Inui decided to be rational.

So, he and Kaidoh turned out to be beyond merely...physically compatible. So, Inui discovered he had more than a few random feelings for the freshman. So what?

Logically it should not matter. It did not matter. For a relationship to be successful and to be truly pair-bonded with someone meant you had to go much further than judge by simply surface signals and base interactions. Love was folly. Physical lust did not last. It was opiate for the masses. Like pop radio, common love between ordinary people was a concept created to distract the weary drones from their unhappy, uncelebrated, meaningless lives. Love was common, but a pair-bonding based on logic and rationality truly could be forever.

Intellectually speaking, the simple fact was Inui worked hard to train his mind. He wasn't born with the distinction of being a tensai or genius from birth. In fact, if anything, Inui was born with several gaping flaws to overcome. All Inui was given is a slightly higher than average IQ, a fierce drive to succeed, and a ruthless determination to overcome anything that held him back from his goals despite his given set of obstacles.Inui's parents taught him from an early age that anyone who works hard enough can overcome anything. Poverty, class, defects, and hardships were the complaints of quitters. Anyone can overcome their flaws.

Anyone can work hard to train their brain and increase their IQ. Much like Kaidoh daily worked hard to train his body, Inui worked out his brain. After years of rigorous mental gymnastics, Inui was light years beyond other average guys his age in intelligence. Thus he knew he was light years beyond Kaidoh Kaoru's simple, average, common thoughts. Therefore a romantic relationship between them lasting though at this moment tempting, inevitably was completely hopeless.

In conclusion, it was much better for Inui to just dismiss any of kind of romantic nonsense right now. It was healthier for him to let Kaidoh go to Oishi (despite how right now it made Inui want to growl, kiss the freshman senseless, and drag him back to Inui's bed until only Inui's name was on Kaidoh's lips).

Inui's feelings here did not mean anything. This desire and these lust-driven thoughts didn't mean anything significant. It could even be oxytocin causing a false bonding after a good shared orgasm. It was most likely hormones and truth be told, Inui felt a bit weary lately. A little tired. He was up late the last few nights and had not been sleeping well. It was nothing more. Oxytocin's effects were proven and could be recreated in a lab setting. It bore no long term meaning and tomorrow at practice Inui intended to demonstrate that fact to everyone.

The bottom line is the freshman would never be capable of truly understanding Inui. Kaidoh simply wasn't going to be as mentally challenging as Tezuka. At least Tezuka seemed more mature and more well-rounded. True their captain had few friends, but you never looked at Tezuka and thought how lonely he looked. Or how he could use a friend. Or a kiss. Or a lover...

Damn. Inui was doing it again. Thinking when he resolved to not think. This was a bad sign. This had to stop.

The freshman didn't even seem to understand the need for them to stop. After all, if Kaidoh was so "in love" with Oishi, it didn't make any sense for him to want Inui to continue. And if he wasn't as into Oishi as he seemed to be, then his wrongly bonding with Inui now would only bring problems later when Inui wound up with Tezuka. There was a plan. Kaidoh needed to stick with it and if he could not, then Inui as his senpai had to keep them on track.

Clearly, Kaidoh was not on track at all. Instead the freshman seemed rather lost and confused. Especially when Inui said he would walk Kaidoh home. As if Kaidoh didn't expect it or possibly did not want this. It was not that Kaidoh was a girl or needed special treatment. On the contrary, Inui believed it would be healthy to do this for several reasons.

First and foremost, due to all the recent attacks, there was no way Inui was going to allow Kaidoh to walk home at night alone. Inui reasoned Kaidoh and the other freshmen might not even know about the attacks. Few people outside the regulars did, but even if he did know, Inui wondered if the smaller boy mistakenly thought he could take care of himself against several larger attackers.

Although perhaps not. It might not be about the attacks or Inui treating Kaidoh like a girl at all because the freshman was looking at Inui as if somehow Inui did or said something...wrong. As if Inui stopping their session because it was the sensible, right, and proper thing to do--somehow broke Kaidoh's heart. Clearly, that could not be the case, but it was confusing. Inui tried to think of what he could have done or said wrong and could not come up with a single thing. He determined more data was needed before he could make a guess as to what upset Kaidoh. Things seemed to be going well. They shared a pleasant time. Kaidoh finished his lesson and both of them shared what Inui thought was a nice orgasm. A bonus. Kaidoh should be happy, not looking so... wounded.

It was strange, but Inui almost felt... guilty. Regardless of the irrationality of guilt, he felt bad and had no clue what he did to upset the freshman.

Inui resolved to watch Kaidoh closer.

As they left Inui's home, the freshman seemed to perk up enough to shrug off whatever upset him. Inui wondered if the freshman was just the kind of person who was happier when moving. If he needed to move to feel good or if moving now soothed whatever unforeseen hurt Inui unknowingly inflicted earlier. At least anyone not knowing Kaidoh would assume the freshman was fine but as they walked, Inui observed several times Kaidoh giving him sidelong glances. The freshman didn't say a word, but every now and again, Kaidoh gave a quiet little sigh. It was the smallest hiss of sharply exhaled air but it seemed as if Kaidoh was a bubbling pot letting off steam so it didn't explode. Indeed, Kaidoh after their "session" was still acting strange.

Inui tried to figure out why. It was possible that it could just be a touch of Kaidoh feeling shy after they were intimate together. It could even be that the freshman was reconsidering the entire situation. It was a serious concern. Oh, Inui wasn't stupid enough to think Kaidoh had feelings for him, but it was within the realm of possibilities that if Kaidoh was given enough time and space to think things over, the freshman might want to cease their sessions and give up all together. Much like Momoshiro, Kaidoh held rather charming old-fashioned, romantic notions when it came to love.

If Kaidoh was left alone too long that the freshman might reconsider the options. If Kaidoh felt insecure after what he and Inui just did, the freshman might decide to never confess to Oishi. He was such a serious fellow Inui could see Kaidoh taking his crush to his grave and never touching another person for as long as he lived. Kaidoh was that kind of bleeding-heart, determined romantic. This simply could not be allowed to happen. Besides the loss to Kaidoh's future happiness, Inui's data showed that when Kaidoh made a decision, even one to quit something, that decision would be final. Nothing would change Kaidoh's mind once it was made up. If Kaidoh somehow became convinced that it was better for him to never confess, he would hold his feelings in to the bitter end of his life all alone. It hurt Inui to even think about Kaidoh like that. All alone and lovelorn.

On the other hand, if earlier Inui gave Kaidoh too much confidence in his skills the freshman might decide to confess to Oishi on his own without any more of Inui's assistance. That hurt just as much to contemplate. If Oishi was going to get Kaidoh, then Inui would do his part to ensure they were happy together.

Perhaps if Inui won Tezuka once and for all, these idle musings about Kaidoh would dissipate.

Kaidoh's role in Inui's plan was vital and thus Inui had to proceed with extreme caution. Inui could not allow the plan to fail. There was no mistake, Inui's calculations showed this was literally his last chance with Tezuka. If he lost Tezuka now to Fuji well, that was bad--however if Kaidoh also ended up unhappy after all this effort--it felt so wrong it felt criminal. If Kaidoh ended up all alone after he trusted Inui so... It was unthinkable. An emotional waste of time that would only distract Inui from the goal. Better to not even go there. Better instead to focus.

With his own mindset determined, Inui tried to figure out what to do now. Besides walking Kaidoh home, he needed to carefully instill a little confidence in Kaidoh. Just enough to continue these sessions by allowing Kaidoh to believe his goal of Oishi was attainable, and yet at the same time Inui had to leave the freshman hungry enough to want more training so he would not attempt to act on his own. It was a precarious balancing act and Inui was just going to have to get to know Kaidoh better so he could adjust his tactics constantly. Inui mused this was much like a tennis game against an adversary without complete data. He would have to instantly take in new data, reconfigure his findings, and perpetually adjust his tactics each time his opponent moved or stepped up his game. Of course, Kaidoh was not his opponent, but for Inui to achieve Kaidoh's future happiness, he would have to think of the freshman as more of an opponent than a teammate. Or a partner...

No, thinking of Kaidoh as that simply would not do.

First order of business was Inui needed to find out why Kaidoh was acting so standoffish now.

Second was to win more of the freshman's trust in order to learn more about him. Inui knew by now if he asked a direct question, Kaidoh was apt to become flustered and shut down. However, if Inui creatively asked in such a way that drew Kaidoh out, he could learn just about anything. In this manner Inui might even learn where Kaidoh picked up those bad habits in bed as well as who his last lovers were. Inui reassured himself that finding out these intimate details were not just feeding Inui's own need to know or any jealous feelings but instead they were actually research for the plan to help Kaidoh.

Inui's decided he could accomplish his first and second immediate goals by sharing a meal with Kaidoh as soon as possible. It was be the best way to reassure the freshman and provide Kaidoh some friendly support.

In addition to reaffirming to Kaidoh the feelings of camaraderie that often happens when a meal is shared between fellows, it would be a good opportunity to gather more data. Inui was certain after the meal he would be able to better gage the freshman's reactions and responses regarding these new lessons and the entire situation. He could see if these "sessions" were helping Kaidoh or maybe creating problems for him as they were for Inui.

It would also be a good opportunity to learn more about the freshman by directly observing and there was the added benefit of any verbal data Kaidoh might unwittingly give during mealtime conversation. Blend these benefits with the fact that Kaidoh would be distracted and happy when he returned to his home and this meal would more than pay for itself. Inui bet himself that Kaidoh would fall asleep thinking about how Inui was his good new friend instead of wondering if maybe he should not proceed. The returns would be well worth another serving of empty calories.

Thinking how Momoshiro and Kaidoh were rather similar in many ways, at first Inui tried to stop to eat at the same fast food place where he had been forced to take Momoshiro earlier. Momoshiro mentioned during their visit that the chain restaurant was a place everyone loved, but Inui could see, Kaidoh did not want to go there. Not that Kaidoh said a word to indicate in any way he was not happy. On the contrary, Kaidoh said nothing in words, but he spoke volumes in other ways.

Inui was pleased to note he was beginning to uncover the many subtle intricacies and delicate body posturings that gave Kaidoh's true feelings away. The quiet freshman was unfailingly and almost painfully proper and polite. Even to the point of causing himself pain, Kaidoh would always choose propriety over his own wishes and wants. Inui was his senpai and if he wanted to poison Kaidoh, then the stoic freshman was willing to almost the point of eagerness to allow Inui to do so. If Inui walked into the fast food place, Kaidoh would have obediently followed and politely choked down the food because that was what was expected of a good underclassman. Inui was intrigued as he postulated Kaidoh further would have even ordered and consumed exactly the same items Inui did even if every bite disgusted the freshman. Even if Inui ordered things Kaidoh was allergic to, the freshman would have probably attempted to force it all down, smiled politely, and then gone home to suffer in silence.

Kaidoh would have suffered because the freshman was simply too polite to cause problems or show any disrespect. In this day and age where most students rebelled out of habit or because rebelling was conforming, Kaidoh followed his heart. For Kaidoh that meant he was respectful, obedient, and followed proper protocol at all times. To Inui, Kaidoh's strict adherence to societal rules really was rather charming. It spoke volumes about this quiet, unassuming freshman's character and inner-strength. While making Kaidoh ill was one guaranteed way to get Kaidoh's mind off Oishi, Inui would rather choose less harsh measures. Inui tabled the interesting idea of making someone ill for later.

Inui's expanding data clearly showed there were clues Kaidoh gave as to his inner emotions. Ones the freshman was probably not aware of, but when one put the data together in a logical manner they gave a clear insight to the freshman's real feelings and inner-most thoughts. Kaidoh was not a very social creature and thus had unusual body postures. Often he stood with what could only be called an odd stance. Originally, Inui had surmised it was because Kaidoh enjoyed being intimidating, but now it seemed that the truth behind the poses instead was painful shyness. Kaidoh had no sense of how he appeared. Instead the freshman had a deep rooted sense of insecurity hidden behind a wall of shy ashamed silence yet it was all backed by a will of solid steel. And between the cold steel will and shy insecurities, Inui was uncovering a surprisingly deep and passionate, yet lonely and wounded boy.

Judging from how he handled Momoshiro, Inui determined long ago the freshman's emotions were most likely immature. Kaidoh probably still saw things in black or white as a child would. The freshman seemingly never explored his feelings or developed any friendships or attachments to anyone outside of his immediate family. Inui had a growing sense that something happened to Kaidoh. Someone Kaidoh trusted deeply on some fundamental level let the freshman down. Somehow Kaidoh's child-like intrinsic faith in someone he cared a great deal for was broken and Kaidoh was betrayed. Almost irreparably. Inui knew the signs of someone close to you betraying you. He recognized all too well the heartbreak caused when someone you love turns against you and hurts you deeply. He knew the self-doubts and insecurities that can cause.

Unless the right person studied Kaidoh long enough to find a way inside, Inui had a feeling the freshman would remain alone. It was almost as if Kaidoh chose to be alone because it would hurt less than being hurt again. Unless the right person reached out to him in the right way, Kaidoh decided somewhere along the line that no one would ever know him. But if no one ever knew him, he would never heal or moved past what happened. The result was a nearly palpable feeling of sorrow and an even greater passion simmered in Kaidoh. It let off little bits of steam in his every action and reaction. Yet, because he chose to be alone, it had no where to exit so like magma beneath a volcano, it bubbled and churned.

Inui was attracted to that in people. Something similar long ago had first attracted him to Tezuka. A burning dark secret that only Inui could uncover, expose, and because he cared so much, eventually heal. Tezuka took his secret to a dark place where no one could see it, notice it, or get close. He pushed it aside so that it was forgotten in a dark corner where he never needed to go. Tezuka would succeed despite whatever it was that happened to him.

Kaidoh took whatever happened to him to a different place. It drove Kaidoh relentlessly forward to try to push past it alone. Kaidoh took his secret and centered whatever it was so that it became a part of who he was and he locked everyone else out. Yet he was not completely able to. Kaidoh practically burned from an interesting need to talk to someone and a fear of telling someone whatever it was. Inui had watched the freshman enough to know, he wanted friends and to be well-liked. He was never far from the popular kids, but add his shyness and his fear of whatever being exposed and Kaidoh was trapped on the fringes watching everyone else having fun. Kaidoh chose to keep his secret and that kept him all alone.

And lonely. The freshman was so lonely you could almost feel the burning ache of it just from spending a little time with him. And perhaps Kaidoh was still too afraid to reach out.

Inui guessed that was what Momoshiro in his initial attempts to befriend Kaidoh never realized. He watched the two freshmen boys closely at the beginning of tennis practices for the year. In his journals all this data was meticulously recorded as Inui watched the two boys almost become friends and mysteriously turn into bitter rivals. He carefully observed the entire situation from afar although at the time, Inui would not have been able to tell someone who read his notes why (not that anyone could read his notes, they were all triple encrypted with Inui's own cypher system just in case).

Now noting he had some feelings for the freshman, for Inui many things now were starting to make sense. Much like a puzzle with pieces suddenly found to fit, but the picture was not clear yet. There were questions Inui had about Kaidoh that as of yet had no answers. Like why Oishi?

Well, whatever else Inui's classmate might be or do, Kaidoh on a basic instinct level must have sensed gentle Oishi would never laugh at Kaidoh or divulge his secrets. Oishi would never knowingly hurt him or break his trust. There were a lot of good points to Oishi, but that didn't mean he was the right person for Kaidoh. In fact, Inui was quickly calculating that Oishi probably was not the right person for the freshman at all. Not that Inui had spent enough time figuring out who the right person for him was, but Oishi would never push Kaidoh in the directions the freshman needed to be pushed to get past whatever happened. Gentle Oishi would only see the freshman's positives. He would never go to those dark places and thus with Oishi, Kaidoh would never be stretched. He would never be challenged. He would never heal.

Kaidoh was a fighter. He needed to be pushed and stretched to build muscle where he was weak and build up strength in all the places he was hurt or damaged. This was as true for the freshman's smaller body as it was for his strong spirit. Kaidoh didn't need someone who would baby or coddle him. He needed a rival or an equal. Someone who would constantly push and challenge him. Someone who might even push all his buttons and annoy the hell out of him, but at the end of the day it would be that person Kaidoh would want to reach for. The freshman would need that person to be there every time he reached. That would help heal him. And most of all, Kaidoh needed someone he could trust with his secrets and his heart.

Clearly, Kaidoh was hiding something. Deeply hiding something big behind walls and walls of protection. There were secrets inside Kaidoh. Maybe even secrets bigger than Tezuka had. There was something hidden that happened and Inui sensed it was more than a guy discovering his first crush was on another guy. Yet, while Kaidoh struggled to maintain this secret and his walls and his little world, remarkably at the same time the freshman in some areas was extremely confident.

Inui's initial observational conclusions that Kaidoh enjoying being alone and took pleasure from seeming intimidating were very wrong and thus the more interested in all this Inui was. Inui was most intrigued by secrets. He loved nothing more than to carefully excavate and expose the inner workings of someone's mind like an archaeologist of the psyche. Especially someone who clearly would be a regular on the tennis team and thus a future rival. Inui even theorized that perhaps this was why he had always paid such careful attention to a freshman. To Kaidoh.

But the closer he got to Kaidoh the person and the more away he got from Kaidoh the data, the less Inui thought that was the case. And tonight after their "session" Inui felt an unfamiliar stirring within himself. It was most unexpected and better if he didn't think about this until he returned home after he finished with Kaidoh.

It was must safer to note how Kaidoh was secure in himself and his abilities when it came to something physical. Then the freshman fought with a fierce tenacity that surprised even Inui. This was why Kaidoh was unable to let his squabbles and battles of will with Momoshiro go. It was stupid. Even Kaidoh knew it was stupid, and yet something inside of him could not walk away when Momoshiro challenged him. Inui realized that the battle between Kaidoh and Momoshiro for Kaidoh took place on an ego level. This was why Kaidoh couldn't let Momoshiro win or walk away. Losing would mean he let himself down in the only area he felt confident and secure about.

Surprisingly, other than the physical strength and tenacity, the freshman had what might perhaps be the lowest self-esteem Inui had ever observed in another person. Inui surmised it probably had something to do with Kaidoh's secret, but more than that, Kaidoh was so self-conscious and worried how others saw him that it was painful to watch him struggle against himself.

The awkward stance was Kaidoh always trying to stand up straight and at the same time look casual. He usually ended up looking a cross between fiercely intimidating and painfully constipated. He was his own worst competition because Kaidoh struggled to be perfect one hundred and ten per cent of the time. He never relaxed or went easy on himself. Inui quickly realized with a few negative or insensitive remarks he could probably shatter Kaidoh, and he found that deeply upsetting. He didn't want that to happen. Despite all the deep-rooted insecurities, Inui found something about Kaidoh so pure it was painfully and starkly beautiful.

Inui had been so curious about this odd little freshman the beginning of the year, he even dug into Kaidoh's background. The freshman came from a family where both parents were still together and he had a sibling he seemed fairly close to. His father had a secure job with a recent promotion and his mother was a homemaker. All the data looked positive. There were no struggles or stresses in Kaidoh's home life. With such a tight-knit family and such driving passions to succeed, it seemed that Kaidoh might just have no need or desire for friends.

Yet that was not the case at all. Kaidoh was so hungry for love and affection and acceptance he was practically starving. Inui knew orphans who were less needy and more secure in themselves. Kaidoh was like a drowning man alone in the middle of the ocean that was grasping desperately for someone, anyone to see him and save him. When Inui met Kaidoh he found the freshman painfully shy and so quiet that many did not even notice him in a room--even Inui dismissed him.

But then Inui watched him play. Kaidoh was like a different person on the courts. He went from a lamb to a lion in less than a second. The dramatic change piqued Inui's need to know. He was curious. Curious enough to finally discover something. Inui found out when he was a little boy, Kaidoh had a stutter when he spoke. It was something Kaidoh overcame with hard work but he apparently still struggled with the scars the affliction left on him.

Inui never heard him stutter and yet, Kaidoh still did the breathing exercises when he spoke because his fear of stuttering was worse than if he actually allowed himself to stammer. Kaidoh must have worked almost overly-hard on overcoming his stutter to the point where the exercises to relax his jaw became habits themselves. It was this discovery more than anything that made Inui realize he would have to watch Kaidoh closely. It occurred to Inui that in Kaidoh's relentless drive to be number one, to overcome any obstacle he faced the freshman would make an amazing opponent. Inui surmised long before anyone else yet had that the freshman was probably overdoing his tennis club self-training and would not stop until he reached his goal. To be the best.

At first Inui wondered why.

He theorized that to Kaidoh the tennis club must represent a way to fit in. A way to be accepted and feel like he had peers and friends even if Kaidoh was too ashamed of himself to speak up when he was actually with people. Even if he was standing off in the corner alone, seeing everyone else around him start to respect how hard the freshman worked gave Kaidoh a sense of pride and a feeling of belonging that he desperately needed. Kaidoh somehow decided he would let his physical strengths make his acceptance a reality.

Inui both admired and pitied him. From the time they met, Kaidoh stirred up all kinds of feelings that Inui wasn't even aware he could feel. Inui respected him and at the same time always felt a strange kind of affection for the freshman. He felt protective of Kaidoh and the more he got to know the mysterious boy, the more interested Inui became.

Kaidoh went to obediently follow Inui into the grease-laden nutritionally devoid restaurant, but Inui saw everything in Kaidoh's stance screamed that he did not want to go inside. Never before had he gathered this much raw data on the freshman as in that moment. At least, never before they were in Inui's bed kissing together.

Inui was fascinated.

He tried to come up with hypotheses as to why Kaidoh would not want to go to such a popular place. It might not even be the food. Inui had to consider that possibility. Maybe he didn't want to go with Inui. Inui was not exactly popular. Maybe he didn't want to go because so many students ate there. It was a social place and he might be seen--but a quick glance inside showed it was nearly empty at this hour.

Mustering up a quick data review he recalled that Kaidoh usually ate his lunch alone in an empty classroom every day. Inui discovered this because he was curious. With how much working out on his own he suspected the freshman did, Inui calculated the sheer volume of food the freshman must consume every day and he wanted to check if his calculations were accurate.

Inui was also curious as to what Kaidoh's diet and eating patterns were. You could tell a lot about someone just based on how, what, and where a person ate. After many questions and much searching, Inui discovered Kaidoh ate alone everyday. It took some doing to find a reason to speak to Kaidoh when he was eating, but Inui found a way when he volunteered to help manage the team. Inui was not surprised that daily Kaidoh consumed a massive amount of healthy foods that all were homemade. The freshman said his mother made his bento box and the food for him daily. Kaidoh said it as if it was a sacred thing his maternal parent did out of love.

So knowing what he ate, thinking of how he tended to eat alone, and knowing how hard Kaidoh trained, Inui was shocked to quickly calculate there was a 98.2 per cent probability that Kaidoh did not eat fast food. Ever. Inui asked, "Kaidoh? I don't really like this place. Is there somewhere else better? Somewhere healthy? I do not dine out frequently."

Kaidoh seemed to carefully weigh his words. He exhaled to relax his jaw and prevent any possible stammering without realizing his habit of exhaling before answering, "There's a...family restaurant near here that is good. It is nothing fancy and it isn't a popular place for students, but we used to eat there, my father, brother, and I when my mom was in the hospital. It's good, very clean, and it's...healthy, but wherever you want to go is fine, senpai." The freshman exhaled again but this time as if relieved he got his words out without any stutter.

Inui thought this quirk was strangely adorable. He was becoming enraptured with learning all these little habits and realized food was an easy topic for he and Kaidoh to converse about. In fact, Inui decided he really should accurately learn Kaidoh's daily caloric intake, training schedule, and then perhaps he could try to put together something for the freshman. It was a good safe topic for discussion and one laden with new data to crunch when Inui returned home. Inui said, "That sounds good, Kaidoh. Let's go there." Inui gestured in the direction where Kaidoh's right foot was pointing for the freshman to lead them. Kaidoh had to lose that habit before others playing against him in tennis picked up on it. To distract Kaidoh and because he was interested Inui asked, "Is your mother all right now? When was she in the hospital?"

Surprisingly, Kaidoh sharply exhaled as if stressed, "Oh." He exhaled again. Clearly, this was a sensitive subject. His odd rigid body posture said so and the freshman would not meet Inui's eyes as he answered, "She is fine. Thank you for asking, senpai. My mother takes such good care of us that sometimes she exhausts herself and neglects herself. The end of last school year, she was doing a lot of cleaning after we converted a third bedroom into a den and office for my father. We helped as much as we could, but she wore herself out. Sometimes the hospital is the only place where she can get any real rest because she is always doing too much. My mother is very delicate, but she's fine now. The restaurant my family likes is just up ahead."

Inui was intrigued. The answer sounded like a fabrication that a family agreed would be the best given answer to hide a deeper or more embarrassing situation or problem, and that was fine. However, the way Kaidoh said it made Inui feel as if was the first time the freshman specifically spoke the words to anyone. It might be. The freshman was close to his parents. His mother had been in the hospital, perhaps frequently, and because Kaidoh was so alone, indeed it was possible no one knew or had ever asked before.

It was another wall Inui tore down and a step closer to Kaidoh just by asking. Inui decided to pace things and not rush them. He knew he had a bad habit of pushing too fast when he was on the verge of making a point or a new discovery. He also knew pushing too fast and rushing things could skew the data and even ruin any possible desired results. In scientific experiments, rushing to get faster results had resulted in all kinds of problems. Once for example one of his special teas that worked so well on a small scale when brewed and consumed after refrigeration somehow chemically fermented.

It was supposed to make the drinker feel relaxed and unfettered so they could divulge potential secrets to Inui. It ended up getting a rival tennis team's manager drunk. Very drunk. Embarrassingly inebriated. Inui was even more embarrassed as the rival manager confessed his love and admiration--for Fuji just before passing out--but not before first becoming violently ill--all over Inui. The team manager woke up also with the worst hangover. He was ill for days and had Inui not quickly dismissed his illness and symptoms as a severe allergic reaction or had the rival manager been the least bit more intelligent, there could have been serious repercussions.

Haste they say makes waste. While the taste and the confessing results of Libertea were excellent, in the end it had to be categorized as a failure. For now, anyway. At least until Inui and his rivals were in university. Then he could begin experimenting with fermentation again and next time he would not rush.

Similarly, when speaking with others, Inui learned to take his time. It was painfully slow for him to extract answers from "normal" people. Normal people to Inui thought slow and spoke even slower. If you pushed them too fast or shocked them, they tended to startle like a spooked lab rat and avoid you. It completely ruined any data when they began avoiding you like you had the plague.

Inui through trial and error found it was best if you took your time with normal people and gained their trust. Food often helped because it made people bond faster when you consumed things with them especially in an environment where they felt comfortable. After you gained their trust and fed them, normal people would open up and tell you just about anything you asked--even if it seemed strange to them. Inui postulated it was because after sharing a meal normal people considered you to be their friend.

Friendship was a strange concept to Inui. He understood the benefits both mentally and physically and while he logically comprehended the concept, he decided long ago that for anyone who was not normal and slow-thinking, friendships were a waste of time. The rapid way people around Inui made and lost friends in school was evidence of the fickle folly of friendship. Love and a love relationship was basically all you needed in life if you had your work and were passionate about it. If you were close to your lover and partner, there was no reason to have friendships. Friends tended to take up time and space that could be better utilized pursuing either your career, your hobbies, or spent with your lover. Inui felt sure that normal people were not able to closely bond with their lovers and partners as more intelligent people were and thus needed friends to fill in the gap that their mismatched pair-bonding left in their lives.

So, when Inui and Kaidoh sat across from each other in the family restaurant sharing a meal, Inui was completely aware that what he was attempting to do was to, in Kaidoh's "normal" mind was befriend the freshman. This would gain Kaidoh's trust. Kaidoh would then answer any questions Inui had and it would serve the dual purpose of ensuring Kaidoh's help in Inui's plan. When this began Tezuka's heart was Inui's only goal. He knew he had to remain steadfast and driven to assure himself victory. He had to remain true to form even if doing this might later hurt Kaidoh's feelings should the freshman want to continue a friendship with Inui--once he won Tezuka to his side, Inui's friendship with Kaidoh would be irrelevant and unnecessary.

After all, it was not Inui's fault if Kaidoh was not intelligent enough to properly pair-bond with Oishi so that Kaidoh had a need for friendships outside of his romantic relationship. At least, that was what Inui was telling himself as they ordered and haltingly made small talk while waiting for the food to arrive. Haltingly because Kaidoh's end of the conversation was stilted. Inui could see the freshman was struggling to come up with things that were proper, not said with a stutter, and at the same time interesting enough to keep the conversation rolling along. To put it as kindly as possible, Kaidoh was fighting instead of talking, but the freshman seemed to be trying with all his heart and will.

And that was sort of the problem, because Inui found it both fascinating and endearing. Clearly, Kaidoh was not used to talking to someone like this, but he very much wanted to. And while Kaidoh was not a mental giant, the freshman was beneath it all surprisingly intelligent. While he was not well-spoken, Kaidoh was surprisingly well read on a variety of subjects and the world around them.

Kaidoh obviously took learning as just another part in his training and studied hard. So when Kaidoh spoke on something, from how he wanted a dog but couldn't have a pet because his brother was allergic to the recent weather, Kaidoh was not repeating information as some children did to impress their parents. He was not repeating what he heard someone else say to try to appear smarter or more mature than he actually was. Instead, amazingly, Kaidoh thought things out and had insightful opinions. Several times Kaidoh said a comment or made an observation that had Inui almost hanging off his every word waiting to hear the next pearl of wisdom Kaidoh Kaoru had stored away in his brain.

Kaidoh was no tensai, but he was a bright and caring person with a lot to give. Perhaps this was why Inui felt guilty about his earlier decision to not be Kaidoh's friend after the plan was ended. Inui's mind raced along and he reasoned with himself that there was no reason to not have any friends. Often he saw couples going out on double dates together and perhaps since Tezuka and Oishi were close friends before this (but only friends, Inui had carefully watched to be certain), Inui could try to continue his friendship with Kaidoh. It would be like what normal people did, but for the first time, Inui thought that being friends with someone might be...nice.

He was in fact so wrapped up in his thoughts of for the first time wanting for himself something he considered only "normal" people would desire--a friendship outside of his romantic relationship, that Inui did not hear what Kaidoh said as they were finishing up their food. Inui was musing over how it might be healthy to have a kouhei, a little brother, that he could guide, "I'm sorry, Kaidoh, I was lost in my own..." Inui realized he almost said feelings. He was being very unlike his usual self and adjusted his glasses. "...thoughts. Could you say that again, please?"

Kaidoh was blushing as he exhaled which was most curious, "I...said thank you for coming here and for the food. I haven't been here in a while."

Inui had to clench his jaw to keep his mouth from hanging open. Kaidoh was clearly giving him an opening to ask questions. While Inui wondered at it, he didn't want to miss the opportunity, "It's my pleasure, Kaidoh." Inui meant it too. He found Kaidoh an enjoyable companion, and more intelligent and thoughtful than Inui had originally postulated. To maintain the conversation and see the freshman's reaction, Inui took a chance, "You and your family were last here when your mother was ill?"

Very defensively, Kaidoh visibly bristled and struck without warning, "She was not ill senpai, she just needed a rest!"

Inui instinctively jumped at the sudden change.

Kaidoh though was instantly regretful and hissed a sigh, "Ssssenpai, I...I'm sorry..."

With a wave of his hand Inui dismissed the apology, "No..I'm sorry Kaidoh, I should not have asked something so personal..." He figured it would be better to end the evening now since Kaidoh was so agitated. Tomorrow if the freshman calmed down enough to allow them another session, Inui could work on re-building the trust between them. He just wasn't sure how and Inui was annoyed at himself for pushing. "If you're ready then...?"

Inui paid the bill and they stepped outside. A light rain must have fallen while they were inside eating. It made the streets shine with moisture and filled the air with a slight damp chill. Inui turned as he released the door after Kaidoh walked through. He knew where the freshman lived and had already mentally mapped out the most expedient route for them to take, but when he turned to start going south, Kaidoh was standing in front of him. Inui stopped short and it was only years of tennis that kept him from colliding into Kaidoh.

For a moment he wondered if Kaidoh knew he could stop in time, and he surmised the instinctively freshman did. Kaidoh watched Inui play at least enough to know how far it would take him to stop. It was impressive, Inui thought to himself and then all thought flew out of his head for an instant because he suddenly realized what Kaidoh was actually doing.

To his shock and amazement, Kaidoh was bowing low to him. The freshman's hands were clenched up into fists and Inui saw there was so much tension and emotion in the freshman's body that he was practically vibrating as he stood there bent as if in deep apology or begging for forgiveness.

Inui couldn't imagine why. "K...Kaidoh...?"

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More soon! XD

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