No Escaping Fate

I have looked, but been unable to find Shuichi’s parents names. So like all good authors do, I made something up. If you know what they are then tell me and I will change it. Thanks to Trish for betaing.

Chapter Twelve

~Japanese~

“They called it Day in the Sun. I wanted to laugh at them and the cliché. It was my own fault, though. I’m the one who wrote about the starving artist who found his one true love only to loose her tragically. Find love, loose love, find it again and then… then she dies.” Eiri settled back in the chair and looked at his unresponsive companion.

“He doesn’t kill himself, but he is never the same, a mere shell of a man, but… he keeps on living. He vows to tell the world just how much he loved her with his art. It is truly sappy and tragic. My fans will eat it up.”

He laughed lightly to himself. His only answer was the steady beep and a new sound; when he had come in that night he found that they had been forced to put his companion on a respirator. The other man had apparently had a stroke and he was now unable to breath on his own.

Eiri brushed a few of the now stark white hairs out of the man’s face. “A nurse told me that your family is considering stopping life support. The doctors weren’t certain that you would wake up before and now they are saying it would be a miracle.”

He sighed and leaned back again. “I won't let them. If I have to I will find a lawyer and get power of attorney. It’s not like you are a burden to them financially. You weren’t a fool. You were ready in case something like this happened. I made sure of that.”

Eiri bit his lip. It was hard to see him with that tube down his throat. What Eiri couldn’t understand was why this had happened now. He had been here so long.

“I’m not sure what to do with the next book. I have a few ideas, but nothing concrete…” Eiri voiced his various ideas for his companion. He sat there for an hour longer than he usually did before reluctantly getting up.

“I will see you next week. Get better. I know you must hate having that thing down your throat.”

*

Shuichi was nervous. He couldn’t remember ever having been this nervous. Not even at his first concert. He was standing in front of the restaurant where Tohma had arranged for him to see his family. They didn’t know why they were there, of course.

It had been two months since his return to Japan. The various members of Seven Sin’s were starting to get used to their new surroundings and Bad Luck had recorded the first three songs for their new album. All and all, things were starting to come together and Shuichi found that he could not put this bit off any longer.

Shuichi took a deep breath to calm his frazzled nerves and walked into the restaurant. The host informed him that the other members of his party were already seated and quickly led him to a private dinning area. It was a nice but informal restaurant that catered mostly to the business class. They had several private dinning rooms that were usually rented out for corporate lunches. Tohma had made the perfect choice of location. This was neutral ground and they would have some privacy in case of any emotional outbursts.

When Shuichi entered the room he saw his mother, father, sister, and Tohma all seated and waiting. Tohma was there as mediator and emotional support for Shuichi. Shu had asked Hiro to come, but the redhead had thought that he was too close to the situation. Tohma had agreed to come and the more Shuichi thought about it the more he felt that it was the right choice. Not only could Tohma support Shuichi if it went badly but he could fill in some of the details and he was less likely to put Shuichi’s family on the defensive or make a scene. Not that it was certain that Tohma would remain calm. Shuichi had found that Tohma had become very protective of him since his return. Whether it was because he was afraid of Shu running off again or if he really cared was uncertain.

His family looked up when he came in, but made no sign of recognition. Tohma had kept his word and not told them. As he sat next to the blond he received several confused looks.

Tohma could feel Shuichi’s unease and took the initiative. “Now that we are all here I can explain what this is about. I need you all to try and remain calm until everyone has been heard.” He received a round of nods as confirmation.

“As the three of you have suspected for some time, I have indeed known of Shuichi’s whereabouts. He was not aware of this fact. I kept his location to myself because it was not my place to interfere.”

At this last bit Shuichi snorted. Tohma didn’t know how to not interfere.

Tohma glared at him for his interruption. “I have been in personal contact with Shuichi for the last two months. He has now expressed his interest in trying to reconcile with the three of you.”

The three of them looked hopeful. His mother spoke first, “Where is he? And you still haven’t introduced your friend.”

Tohma smiled sweetly at Shuichi’s mother. “Yes, how rude of me. Let me introduce you to Shindou Shuichi.” Tohma made a grand sweeping gesture toward Shuichi.

There was complete silence for all of ten seconds. “That is not my son.”

Shuichi didn’t know whether to be hurt or to laugh. They really had not recognized him. “Tell me something, father," Shu said. "Am I not your son because I left or because I don’t look the same?”

Tohma was proud of his little friend for remaining calm, but at the same time he was worried. The singer’s voice was hollow. Shindou-san’s comment had already put Shuichi on the defensive and the younger man was preparing for the worst.

“I… what… Shuichi?”

Shuichi nodded. The various emotions around the table were intense. No one seemed to know how to react. It was Maiko who broke the silence. “You stupid little baka! How dare you just up and leave like that. Do you know how worried we were? And you,” she said turning and pointing at Tohma, “you knew where he was and you said nothing! How long has he been back in Japan? How long have you been hiding him from us?” She made to stand, but her father put a restraining hand on her shoulder. Once again the room was plunged into silence.

Shindou Touru had always considered himself a reasonable man. When his son had told him that he wanted to be a singer he had resisted, but as he saw the boy’s talent grow he supported him. When Shuichi had told him he was gay he had taken it in stride. When his son came home crying after a fight with his lover, he did his best to help his wife comfort and reassure the young man. But when his son had started to withdraw and become cold he had reacted like any father would: he had gotten mad and overreacted. He had contributed to his son leaving as much as everyone else.

“I’m sorry, these were the first words that Touru had said all night.

Shuichi looked stunned. “You’re sorry? What do you have to be sorry for? I’m the one who left.”

Touru got up and rounded the western style table. He crouched down by his son and looked Shuichi in the eye. As he stared into those familiar purple depths the last little bit of doubt as to if this really was his son faded. “I didn’t help you when you needed me. I got mad and defensive when you needed support. I wish that I had paid more attention instead of jumping to conclusions. That is why I am sorry.”

Shuichi was startled when his father suddenly hugged him. The man had never been the ‘touchy, feely’ sort. Hugs in his childhood had been rare and treasured things. Not that he had been a cold father, but he considered such displays un-masculine most of the time.

Shu slowly relaxed into the embrace and let a smile cross his lips. ‘Now if I can just get out of this room without Maiko killing me.’

*

The family had spent hours talking. Shuichi had been honest with them and told them the whole story. He accepted his sister’s rants and mother’s tears gracefully. Tohma for the most part sat back and stayed out of it until he was asked about his part in the ‘plot’ as Maiko had taken to calling it.

After many assurances that he was not going to disappear again Shuichi said good-bye and made his way out of the restaurant with Tohma next to him.

“Are you alright?” Shuichi glanced over at the blond as they walked across the parking lot to their respective vehicles.

“It was hard, but I am glad that I did it. I've missed them. It feels nice to have that weight of my chest.” Shuichi pulled his keys from his pocket and made to head toward his car.

Tohma had stopped and was watching Shuichi. Before the singer was out of earshot he called. “Only one piece left to the puzzle now.”

Shuichi stopped dead and turned around slowly. The phrase sounded so familiar, but he didn’t know from where. “What do you mean?”

Tohma closed the distance between them. “You have repaired your life bit by bit. Not without difficulty, but it has been done. Now all you lack it that last piece of the puzzle.”

“Eiri.” Shuichi didn’t know why he said it, but he wished he hadn’t. As soon as the name crossed his lips he was mentally cursing himself. He looked up at the blond and glared. “You promised to leave that alone.”

Tohma smiled serenely down at him. “I didn’t say it, you did.” Tohma turned and started walking again. “Think about it Shuichi, your heart is begging you to,” he called back over his shoulder.

Shuichi stood there in the darkening parking lot for several long minutes after Tohma drove away. He was lost in thoughts of what the keyboardist had said. His dreams were still haunted by golden eyes and hair. His heart skipped a beat every time he thought he caught a glimpse of the author. “Damn it, Tohma, why are you always right?”

*

“Stop!” Shuichi rubbed at his eyes in frustration. He was having trouble keeping his mind on his work. “Sorry guys, but I need a break.”

He didn’t wait for a response as he walked out of the rehearsal studio. He made his way to the now very familiar courtyard and pulled out a smoke. He sighed in relief as the nicotine rushed into his veins.

He looked up, startled, when a voice spoke close to his ear. “Long day?”

Shuichi smiled wanly at Ryuichi and nodded. The other singer plopped down next to him and reclined. “Thought so. You smoke more when you are frustrated and I have seen you come out here no less than three times in the last two hours.” Ryu looked at his friend with prying eyes. “Want to talk about it?”

Shuichi scratched his head and leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees. “I’ve just been thinking a lot lately.”

If Shuichi had been looking he would have seen Ryu roll his eyes. “That much is obvious, Shu-chan.”

Shuichi chuckled when Kuma suddenly appeared in front of his face. “Now that you have the obvious out of the way, you can tell Kuma-chan and Ryu-chan what is wrong, ne?”

Shuichi sighed and scratched the pink bunny on the head. “Yeah… Tohma said something to me the other day and it got me thinking.” He leaned back and lit another cigarette. “He said, ‘you have repaired your life bit by bit… now all you lack it that last piece of the puzzle.’ It was kind of disturbing.”

Ryu put his hand under Shu’s chin and turned the other singer to face him. “He’s right.”

Shuichi pulled away from the touch and looked down again. “I know, but at the same time I still don’t think…”

“That is the problem.”

Shuichi looked up, confused. “What is?”

“You’re thinking too hard again. What you need to do is feel. It is time to make a choice Shu-chan.” Ryu leaned forward and stared hard into Shuichi’s eyes, his expression grave. “You are running out of time and soon there won't be any turning back. You have dallied too long already and it is starting to wear on you.”

Shuichi felt a chill run down his spine. Something wasn’t right about this conversation. “I… what…”

Ryu looked away and stood. “You cannot survive in limbo forever, Shu-chan. It is time to decide if you will stay or move on.”

Shuichi felt a sudden panic rising in his chest. Something was off. He felt dizzy. “Ryu… I don’t… I can’t…”

Ryuichi still stood in the same spot as if a statue looking into the distance. “I can’t help you Shuichi. You have to decide on your own. You have been given ample opportunity to reconcile your misgivings. You walked away from us all, but you never really left. How does the story end Shuichi?”

Shuichi felt darkness creeping in on his vision, but somewhere from deep inside he found strength enough to whisper, “Stories don’t really end. Something always happens after they’re over.”

Just before the darkness consumed him he saw Ryuichi turn toward him and smile.

*

So? Too much? Not enough? There’s still more to come.