Darkness Within your Light

Thank you all who reviewed! I luvs you all soooo much! HUGS!!

70_Sol_Laen,- Thanks so much for your support! I'm sorry that my writer's block still hasn't gone away so I don't know how well this chapter has turned out...I'm ok though, finals are here and I'm scrabbling at them.

Aurora Moon,- Thanks! hehe yep writer's block sucks! I hope that it goes away soon, and that no one else will suffer from it!

Gryphonwills,- Thanks!

Elle,- Seriously I love you! Thank you sooo much! Your senere comments have lifted my sprites! I'm sooo happy you still like my story even though it seems to be dragging a bit...sniff...thank you so much. oh and 'Bleach' is the best anime out there! XD Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Draug,- more bonding...that's all that happens in this really short chapter, the next chapter(I seem to say that a lot) will have much more happening in it. It's cool that you check everyday for a update. hehe I do the same thing to all of my favoirte stories to.

Sarian,- wow I'm glad I made you so happy with my last chapter! it made me soo happy to hear this. this is sadly a very short chapter but I figured that an update would be welcome, no matter the size.

Stitches,- wow thank you! I'm so happy that you love it so much! It warms my writer's heart to hear such happiness from my readers! heh I love rereading my favoirte stories...to hear someone else does it to, and to my own story...well let's just say that my smile can't get any bigger! XD

Mustang89,- thank you, I also hope this writer's block will dismiss itself. It's really effecting my writing...and I want to give it my all with this story...oh well. anyway thank you for the review! CX

Nyves,- hee please no Misa! wow thank you so much for your energitic comments. The lemon will not be to much off...maybe within the next 5 to 8 chapters, I don't know...hmm, anyway thank you so much I hope you continue to enjoy my story as I continue it!

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The silence that descended around them after Raito’s shocking response was more then slightly stifling. L just stared at Raito, as if he couldn’t believe his ears. Not that Raito blamed him. He was basically just told by a mass murderer who L had been tracking for months that it was worth the lives of thousands of people just so that they would have met. He probably didn’t know how to take that. Hell Raito didn’t know how to take it and he was the one who felt it.

Finally it seemed that L had come to a decision to Raito’s confession.

“I really don’t know what to say to that Raito-kun, I do know that I love you and while I can possibly forgive you for you’re…misdeeds I don’t think that I will able to ever forget. I…I don’t think that the lives that you have taken were worth us meeting like this. That may seem harsh and cruel of me Raito-kun but it‘s the truth. Who knows? Maybe even if Kira had never been created we would have met under different circumstances.”

While Raito had been expecting this, he couldn’t help the slight sting in his heart as he heard L talk. But he had been bracing himself for this type of respond and he was surprised that after that slight twinge of his heart he felt…well maybe not ok but he knew that he could accepted what L said wholeheartedly. L was L, he was justice and not even Raito could divert him far from that path, not that he would want to anyway, he was no longer Kira and no longer felt complied and obsessed with changing L’s views. In fact he now agreed more with L’s views then his old ones. He was no longer the naïve child that wanted to paint the world in his own image.

“…so Raito-kun…I was wondering if you can now explain to me about how you became Kira in the first place.”

Raito lifted his head from where he had become lost in thought, he looked at the expecting face of L and sighed, nothing could slow L down when he wanted to know something, it had been foolish of Raito to even try, no matter that he didn’t really want to talk about it, he knew he had to, especially if he wanted L to trust and believe in him.

‘I kind of wish that Zaki was awake…but I don’t really want to disturb him right now…besides I need to deal with this myself, if I can’t even do this…how could I ever hope for redemption?’

Raito to a deep breath and locked eyes with L’s dark ones, it was now or never.

“It all began when I was sitting in class, bored out of my mind; I turned my head to look out the window…”

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Raito started telling L all about how he found the Deathnote and all the events that happened after that. Even about his feelings on finding the deathnote and using it for the first time, how sick and terrified he had been when he had first used it, believing that it had been nothing more then some elaborate joke. And finally he talked about how he had come to the decision that he would force his own ideals on the world, how he had become corrupt and power hungry.

He told L all about Ryuk and Rem being the shinigami’s that were the true owners of the deathnotes and about how Misa was the second Kira and how she and Rem where technically blackmailing him to be her boyfriend, but he didn’t dismiss his own involvement at all or try to shoulder all the blame onto Misa. He promised himself and L that he would tell the truth and he wasn’t going back on his word anymore!

L seemed fascinated by all Raito was saying, his black eyes seemed at least twice as large as normal as he listen to Raito talk. He kept quite the entire time, though there were times that he looked like he wanted to say sometime he held his tongue. Raito had to admit that this strangely patient L was seriously freaking him out.

Raito paused in his tale; he had just gotten to the part when he had been locked up in the cell. This was the point where he had to choose, to either tell L all about how he was from a future that with hope and a huge amount of luck would never come to pass or to just end the tale here.

‘What should I do? I need to tell him but…I really don’t want to go to a quack house, though considering how he’s taking the idea of a killer notebook and the existence of shinigami’s maybe he’ll take the idea of me being a time-traveling immortal hybrid of shinigami and human who is now trying to do the opposite of what I was as Kira, that I’m trying to save lives now instead of taking them.’

“Raito-kun?”

Raito started as he heard L call him, looking into L’s worried eyes he realized that he was silent for to long.

Raito cough a little in embarrassment, he hadn’t meant to get lost in thought again. It annoyed him that it seemed to be happening to him a lot lately.

“Umm…L? Before I continue I need to know how you’re doing so far.”

L gave him a disbelieving look, his eyebrows raised.

“Raito-kun…you’ve just told me that Kira the mass murderer that I’ve been hunting for months now…is a freaking notebook, I have to say me not throwing a tantrum and trashing your room shows how good I am.”

Raito was confused and annoyed at the same time, he didn’t know what L meant when he called the deathnote Kira, though in a way that was very accurate in a way he still couldn’t figure if L believed him or not.

“L…in case you’ve forgotten I’m Kira.”

L sat up and waved his hand in a dismissal manner which annoyed Raito further.

“Yes Raito-kun I know you were Kira in a way, but it seems to me that the real power and focus of Kira is this Deathnote, not you. The way I see it you were corrupted by the evil power, it shaped your while noble very foolish, childish dream of getting rid of crime and evil in the world and making a perfectly light world…it was a very irrational dream Raito-kun, but I know that you are a very optimistic person, no matter that you are arrogant and egotist, and I say because we are similar in that way. I have only a lot more experience in life Raito-kun; I know that the world can never be prefect like that…human emotions wouldn’t allow that. There will always be darker emotions in the human physic to counter our more positive emotions…like love and affection.”

“Raito-kun…you may have been a vessel of Kira, and you’ve used the Deathnote and caused the death of thousands…but the human heart has always been irrational…I know that I love you, and I would like to believe that you share that sentiment as well. I don’t know how or why but…I believe that you are no longer Kira…it’s not just a feeling in my heart that tells me this, although that is one part of it, but…I just had this feeling, like a weight had been lifted off my chest, it had been like having a death sentence hang over my head or something. But then suddenly it vanished, it happened the moment you collapsed in your cell screaming.”

Raito stared in shock as L finally winded down from his…well Raito didn’t know what to call it. Raito saw that L was looking at him like he was expecting Raito to say something, Raito opened his mouth not knowing what to say, but it seemed that his smart-ass mouth didn’t care that his brain couldn’t follow.

“…I think that’s the most I’ve ever heard you speak at one time…”

Raito blushed in embarrassment, here L made a passionate speech to him and all he had to say was that. L didn’t seem mad though, he just rolled his eyes in exasperation.

“You have such a way with words Raito-kun, now…shall we continue? Or do you want more time to decide if you want to tell me the rest of the story?”

Raito blushed harder as he was caught red handed. L was right though he needed to tell him the rest of the story, nuthouse house or no nuthouse.

“Well L the truth is…I’m not entirely the Yagami Raito you know from before…before you put me in that cell that is.”

L raised an eyebrow and shot Raito a look of disbelief.

“You want to explain what you mean by that Raito-kun?”

Raito took a deep breath, now how to explain that everything? How should he go about it? Raito had an idea brewing in his head, it was still very hazy and he hadn’t had the time to harsh it out but…

“Well…hmm…I guess it would be easiest to show you instead.”

“Oh?”

“Yes…so L…I want you to knock me unconscious.”

“…”

“…”

“E-excuse me!?”

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I’m so sorry that this is so short! But I needed to get this up; because I’ve been so busy lately I try to update whatever I have written down as quickly as possible. So sorry about that! I will have the rest of what was suppose to be in this chapter up as soon as I can in the next chapter!

It most likely won’t be until sometime in January, after new years, but I’ll try to have at least the next two or so chapters written up by then so I can upload them for all of you.

Do you want to know what’s really stupid? I haven’t even gotten to the plot of this story yet! Yep! Up till now all of my chapter’s have been technically filler chapters…this story’s going to at least be 40 to 50 chapters…urg!

So what do you all think? I’m sorry that L and Raito are so OOC, but I just can’t seem to keep them in-character, at least when they are having heart-to-heart confessing conversations. Oh well…

Can anyone guess what Raito’s plan is to show L? hmm? Hehe I bet a lot of you can figure it out. The conclusion of the explanations will be in the next chapter, and then I might, might do a special chapter on everyone else’s point-of-views of what happened when Matsuda shot Raito.

So Review please! Review! Review! Review! PLEASE!