Adult-FanFiction.org : Anime

Stellar Mistakes
By : Rhov
Category: +. to F > Fairy Tail
Views: 14748 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail nor do I make money from this fanfic.
Chapter List
- 19
- 20
- 21
Chapter 20
Baguettes and Brandy
They stopped by Lucy's place so she could feed Plue, take him out walking to poop, and so Lucy could pack a change of clothes. The weird, white dog really liked Loke, wagging his whole body in excitement and licking him. Rather than act grossed out, Loke laughed and petted Plue.
"Who's a good boy? Yes, you're a good boy. You guard Lucy, keep her safe. Yes, good boy!" he cooed.
Lucy covered her mouth to hold back a laugh. She felt warmth in her heart at seeing the man she admired so deeply playing with the pet who meant the world to her.
"You really like dogs," she said.
"I'm more of a cat person, to be honest," he said, still ruffling up Plue's white fur. "However, my family owned some dogs just like this, except with different coloring. They're incredibly loyal animals. Aren't you?" he said in baby talk to Plue. "Who's a good, loyal doggie? Is you a good doggie? Yes, you is!" He laughed as Plue seemed to dance with excitement. "I miss having a pet, but my condo doesn't allow them."
"That's a shame. It took me a long time to find an apartment that allows dogs."
"Yeah, I've been thinking about moving just for that reason. Well, for many reasons, but definitely the next place I live will allow pets."
For many reasons? Lucy wondered what he meant, but then she recalled the woman in the lobby at Fairy Tail. Would he move into a new place to start a family with her? Lucy shoved the thought aside for now, laughing instead as Loke played with Plue.
Finally, Loke realized he was hungry, neither one had eaten dinner, so they went to a store to pick up groceries. Lucy blushed as she walked through the aisles by Loke's side, him pushing the shopping cart, diligently asking her about what sorts of food she liked. She chuckled when he excitedly pointed out his favorite ice cream. She mentioned how much she loved sherbet, and Loke recommended a restaurant he knew with great pastries and desserts, highly praised by a friend of his obsessed with strawberry cake.
They decided upon something simple, just precooked meat, cheese, bread, and a few things Lucy insisted she could use to make a quick, light meal. Loke paid for the food, they loaded the groceries into the sports car, and again they drove through the night. As the streetlights flashed past them, Loke's hand casually reached over and settled on Lucy's thigh, making her blush at the intimate touch. Hesitantly, she placed her hand on his, and Loke glanced over to her with a smile that warmed her heart.
Once they arrived at Loke's place, Lucy borrowed his kitchen to make a few things they could eat.
"Sorry that I had no food," Loke said as he helped to sort through the grocery bags. "I tend to eat out mostly these days. I rarely use the kitchen."
Although he said that, and Lucy glimpsed that his refrigerator was mostly yogurts and beer, still the kitchen was clean, the utensils classy. She felt nervous even taking a plate down from the shelf, since she was certain each item must have cost a lot.
While she cut slices of roasted chicken and various cheese for appetizers, she realized that Loke was standing right behind her.
"Looks good," he said, and he reached around her to snag a bite-size piece of chicken.
"Can't you wait until I'm done?"
"But I'm hungry," he said with a pout.
Lucy giggled. "Oh, Mr. Leo!" There was a refreshing innocence about him that she had never seen before. It was charming to watch him act like a boy and not like her boss.
"That cheese looks good, too." He began to reach forward, and she batted his hand away. "Hey, what are these? Tomatoes and some herb?"
She glanced over to a platter she had quickly whipped together. "Oh, that's caprese canapés. Slices of baguette, tomato, a slice of mozzarella, and fresh basil."
"A woman's cooking! It even looks better."
"It's not much, really," he said modestly. "It's something I usually bring to potlucks."
"Potlucks?" he said in surprise, and Loke thought about the idea. "Fairy Tail's never had one of those. We should host one so I can eat more of your food."
"Fairy Tail is a bit high class to be hosting a potluck."
"Not if the food is like this." He tried to snag another piece of roast chicken, and she smacked his hand away again.
"I'll have to cook you something for real next time. You can barely call putting a slice of tomato on top of cheese, or slicing up pre-baked chicken, cooking."
"A dinner cooked by you? I look forward to it."
Her cheeks began to burn. Without realizing it, they had just promised to see each other again. However, Lucy finished with the hors d'oeuvres. "There. I'll carry these into the other room."
"I'll help," he immediately offered, and he took the plate of meat and cheese. Lucy saw him pop another piece of chicken into his mouth, and she chuckled at the Lion's playful side.
They took the plates to the other room, where Loke had already set out the brandy.
"Are you sure about opening this?" Lucy asked, feeling bad about using such fine alcohol on something like this. The bottle looked expensive and had an elegant design on the label.
"Do you not want any?"
"It's not that. I'm worried you'll be wasting it. You've been saving it for so long."
Hearing that, he gave her a funny smile. "Saving it? Not really."
That made her blush. Okay, maybe that came out weird. "It's … it's just a proposal for the ad. Doesn't it make more sense to save it for when we win the account?"
"We'll go somewhere good with the whole team when that happens. Tonight, it's just the two of us."
Her heart skipped a beat at hearing him say that. Meanwhile, Loke reached for the bottle of brandy and slowly opened it up.
"Whoa! That smells so good," Lucy said, already sniffing something floral and fruity. She heard Loke chuckling and saw him politely trying to hide his mouth. "Er, sorry. I guess that wasn't very sophisticated of me."
"Don't be. I really like your forthrightness." He poured two snifters and handed one to her. She cautiously took the bulbous glass, worried if it was as fragile as it looked. "Cheers," he said, clinking his glass against hers, which showed her that these snifters were sturdy enough.
"I'm nervous," she admitted, staring down at the amber liquor.
"You haven't had it before, so go slow when you take your first sip." He sniffed the glass, then brought it to his lips. Lucy watched precisely how he drank it. "This really is good. It'll spoil you for brandy for the rest of your life."
Lucy brought the drink up, and the rim of the glass went above her nose, inundating her with the smell of fruits and wood and a hint of marshmallows. She knew nothing about brandy, but even she was enchanted by the bold fragrance.
"Here goes," she muttered, and she took a cautious sip.
The alcohol felt hot in her throat. It was like toffee and confection sugar and cigars and flowers and dried fruit, a sophisticated taste that lingered long after she swallowed. She realized that Loke was already drinking his with ease as he ate the caprese canapés she made.
"You really enjoy brandy, don't you?" she said, charmed by how relaxed he looked.
He hummed in agreement. "I used to drink beer and wine, I even had a taste for sake for a while, but these days, this is what I go for."
Lucy took another tiny sip. She could not drink it as fast as he could, but it was not as harsh as she had been expecting. On the contrary, it was smooth and warm.
"So, what do you think?"
She held the glass out to look at the color. "It's funny, I didn't think it'd be for me, but it's sweeter than I was expecting. I like it."
"That's good. Sounds like we can enjoy it together from now on." He finished off his glass and poured himself another.
'Together … from now on … What is he saying exactly?'
Although his words made her happy, she also got a mental image of the woman she saw by the elevator, the petite pink-haired Aries in her tiny, white, fluffy dress. She was clearly from a well-to-do family, brought up impeccably. It was obvious she was the one Loke was set up with and was considering marrying, yet he did not seem to care that Lucy saw her.
Wasn't it more normal to be worried that your lover had seen the woman you were considering marrying? Or was Lucy barely even that? Was she worthy of him being concerned that she saw Aries and him together? Did it not matter to him if she saw or not? Was she not that important after all, just someone from work that he fucked from time to time?
Suddenly, she could not taste the brandy anymore as her mind went into a dark place.
"Lucy?"
She looked up abruptly. "Oh, sorry. It's my first time drinking something so strong. Maybe I'm tipsy already."
"You're not," he said with a smile. "I've seen you tipsy. I've seen you thoroughly drunk, as well." She pouted that he was teasing her about that first night again. Instead of pestering her more, he picked up the proposal from the table. "You know, this idea is really great. I like your theme: 'Dreaming with someone you love.' Focusing on the people who watch over the athletes and the matches. The athletes don't fight their battles alone. Reading this moved me."
"To tell the truth, I didn't think of that on my own."
His eyes widened. "Did someone help you?"
She tucked her head down. "You could call it help, or inspiration. I've been holed up in Fairy Tail's library."
He nodded but looked suspicious.
"There, I found a cardboard box full of your old work."
"What?" he said, visibly shocked. Lucy had never seen him look so surprised before.
She looked down at the proposal, thinking about how, in a way, the spirit of Loke's past had guided her toward this inspiration. "The man I've long admired was in that box. Ideas that worked, ideas that were rejected, they were all there. I got a glimpse into your inner thinking. I wanted to work at Fairy Tail because of the observatory commercial you did."
"That's right, you mentioned that during our first night. Still, that's troubling. My old work," he mused. "How did a thing like that make its way to the library?"
"It was in the very back corner of the room. You didn't put it there?"
He shook his head. "I do remember putting everything into a box when I was given my current position and a new office. Maybe an admin made a mistake, thought it was important paperwork, and had it moved to the library instead of recycled."
"Oh, don't recycle it! It was genius."
"It was trash," he grumbled.
"Not to me. It was lucky that I found it. I was surprised by how many ideas were rejected, though, considering how famous you are for your commercials."
Remembering back then, what must have been years ago, before Lucy joined Fairy Tail, Loke set his glass down and smiled to himself. "Back then, I'd write proposal after proposal, but none of them were any good. I'd stay late every night and fill my notebooks until I could barely make out what I had written. It was mostly garbage, but I'd hold onto those old notebooks. Sometimes, ideas cycled back around."
Lucy thought about how she did most of her work on computer, rarely using notebooks. Loke had been old-fashion in that respect. Lucy could fill a document with ideas and easily delete them. She only used notebooks when away from her computer, or when she needed to write and drawn at the same time for storyboarding. She realized, she normally recycled those old notebooks. Loke had held onto them up until he was promoted to Creative Director and would never need them again. One thing Lucy learned from this was that even the rejected ideas were worth keeping around. Even if an idea was not good for that particular task, it could be what she needed later on.
Lucy picked up some cheese to eat. "It's hard to imagine now, you writing something that'd get rejected."
Loke also helped himself to food. "No one starts out with the ideas flowing freely. I would worry every day if my ideas were any good, like you are now. Mmh, these are really good," he said, chewing the caprese canapés. "I was just starting out when I made that commercial that you like."
"The observatory event?"
He nodded and ate some more. "No one liked it. They all kept saying it was too sappy for a commercial about a local event."
"Well, I liked it. I felt like I was watching a movie. I recorded it and watched it over and over again. It changed the way I thought about the world."
He swallowed down some of the roasted chicken. "You told me that on that night, too, albeit less articulately."
She blushed and pouted. Less articulate … because she had been drunk. Still, it meant she had really wanted him to know about that, and how much he inspired her.
"I know you don't remember," he said cautiously, "but … it made me feel like all the work I put into that commercial back then was finally getting recognized. I really wanted the observatory account. You see, astronomy has always been one of my great passions. I used to dream as a child about being an astronaut and going up into the stars." He blushed at talking about some silly, cliché childhood dream. "But no one thought the commercial was that big of a deal, just one astronomical event, hardly worth the bother. You found it, though. You found my first commercial, the one that nobody showed any interest in. That made me really happy."
Loke had such a pure smile. There was no teasing anymore, no tricks. He even looked a little bashful, and it made Lucy's heart soar. It was such a strange feeling, something she had never felt before in her life. She held her hands to her heart, so amazed that she was the one who managed to validate his determination, his creativity, even if it came many years later. She was the one who cared for his first work. From the very beginning, in a world that hated commercials, he had a fan in her.
He chuckled and rubbed the back of his head, still looking boyish and flustered. "I guess it's strange for me to say that now, after all this time."
"Oh! No, I'm happy, too. I'm happy that I found a commercial that could affect me like that, and I'm glad you made it. I've always loved the observatory. Your commercial reminded me of going there with my mother. It was a memory that made me cry and smile and remember some good times I had with my mother. It touched my heart deeper than anything I had experienced on television before."
"Hearing you say that makes me want to develop a commercial again."
"Dr. Capricorn said that, at heart, you're a player and a creator."
"He did, huh?" he said, looking bashful again. "That old goat, always snitching on me, ever since preschool."
She always thought that Loke was a world away from her, something celestial that she could never hope to reach. She had thought that ideas came to him naturally, like he was blessed with genius by the stars themselves. The more she got to know him, the more she realized that those were illusions. The real Loke was actually awkward, but he covered it up with lots of effort. All of those notes sticking out of the papers she found proved that he struggled to reach this point in life.
She heard him speak, "We're the same, aren't we?"
Lucy jolted out of her thoughts. "Huh?"
He was looking into his brandy glass. "I know what people want from 'Mister Leo,' so I give it to them. I don't let the image crumble. In reality," he said, and he drank the last of the amber liquor, "there's nothing special about me."
"That's … that's not true!" she insisted, although it took a lot of effort for her to get the words out.
He poured more brandy into his empty glass and watched her tenderly. "I know what you're feeling when you get excited about your work. When I look at you, it's like I'm looking at my younger self."
Lucy's mouth dropped as she recalled what Capricorn had told her.
"You remind me of him when he was younger. Reckless, hardworking, voracious when it comes to the things you like. Perhaps he senses that about you."
Loke went on, "Desperate to meet everyone's expectations—the people around you, as well as the people who watch the commercials—thinking you're not good enough, and covering it up with more effort and work."
"Were you like that?"
He did not answer, but he smiled. "I like that about you."
Like that? Did he mean merely her work ethic, or did he mean something more? What was he feeling? She could not read him at all.
They looked at each other silently. His green eyes were piercing from behind his glasses. Lucy felt like a lamb transfixed by the hypnotic stare of a lion. She was about to say something but her elbow knocked over a glass of water on the table.
"Ah!"
"Oops!" Loke swept the glass up before it rolled off and broke. "Are you okay?"
"S-sorry."
"At least it wasn't the brandy. Did you get your clothes wet? Hold on, I'll get you a towel."
He leaped up and disappeared into the bedroom. Lucy stood and began to follow. Her feelings were getting so intense, she did not know what to make of them. All she could do was follow her instinct, and that led her to the bedroom. She peeked in and saw Loke by an opened closet.
That night, in this room…
She looked at the big bed and remembered their second night together. Erotic memories returned, making her feel flushed. She was about to turn away when her eyes caught sight of something inside the closet.
Aries' chic paper bag. It looked so cute and out of place in the masculine apartment with solid colors, firm lines, and minimalist décor. Lucy thought about that petite woman, and she looked away with jealousy.
She had not seen Loke carrying the bag with him when they left the office, nor putting the groceries into the car. He must have hidden it from her sight as they brought the bags of food up, and then slipped away to the bedroom to stash that bag here, where she would not see it. If it was something he hated, he would have left it in the office, but he took it with him and hid it away for later. It was that precious … she was that precious, that little lamb of a woman all dressed in white, hiding her gift away as if Lucy might stain it with her immorality.
She remembered what Loke told her when she had asked about the rumors of his engagement.
"It was just an omiai, a traditional matchmaking arrangement. We were introduced to each other as perspective marriage partners. Nothing more. We might get married, we might not. Gotta admit, it's not a bad arrangement. It'd help me get a promotion."
If it was just a meeting with some prospective marriage partner, that would have been the end of it, yet here they were, weeks later, and he was still seeing that woman. Not only that, but she was coming to Fairy Tail to give him food … already like a good, attentive wife. If he was no longer considering the possibility of marrying her, there would have been no reason for Aries to come to his workplace. She was obviously from some old-fashion, traditional family, considering they had her attend an omiai. In families like that, a woman did not meet up with a man late at night unless they were serious after the future.
Lucy pulled back, all the warmth of the brandy now bitter in her throat. There she was, accepting an invitation to Loke's apartment for drinks and sex, and he was thinking about marrying someone else. She had known early on what he was planning, she had now even seen the woman herself, yet still, she came to his bedroom like this. She had been in such a dreamy mood a moment ago, but all at once, she was brought back to harsh reality.
Just because they had this relationship, it did not mean that the arrangement he had with that other woman disappeared. Maybe he was going forward with the engagement and felt he did not need to tell Lucy about it. It was his private life and none of her business. He had glared at her so sternly in the elevator at work, silently warning her not to ask about it.
She repeated to herself, it was none of her business, it was part of his private life, and what she thought, what she felt, had no place in his private life.
Her emotions cooled off, leaving her a bit dazed. Meanwhile, Loke pulled a towel out of the closet.
"Mr. Leo?" She was unsure if she finally spoke because she was feeling guilty, or because she wanted him to close the closet containing that colorful paper bag.
He turned around. "Hey, what is it?"
She opened her mouth, but it was like she lost her voice to a sea witch.
'I can't complain. Mr. Leo doesn't owe me anything. In fact, he was in the middle of something with another woman when I stumbled into his life. I'm the one who should be yelled at for getting in his way.'
She felt so down now, she did not even feel like asking him about it anymore. She lowered her eyes and struggled to soothe her aching heart. She wanted to know what Loke was feeling, but she was afraid that if she went there, everything would come crumbing down. She could not bring herself to ask and risk it.
He said they were the same, but were they really? Saying we're the same implied intimacy. She should be happy, but at that moment, his words hurt. How was she the same as him? He was prepared to marry a woman he barely even knew, all for a job promotion, whilst keeping an underling from work as a mistress. Lucy balled her hands into tight fists as the idea of such a thing rankled her. If it was her, pretending to feel something to achieve a goal would be too hard. Her emotions were too intense … and too fragile.
"If you and I really are the same, it must be hard for you, getting married for the sake of a promotion." She made sure not to say it with sarcasm or spite. It was the simple truth.
Twice in that night, she stunned him, making his eyes widen and his mouth drop. Still, she knew a truth about him that probably no one else knew, a side of him no one else had yet seen. She had witnessed the cold expression he wore when she saw him with Aries. He had not looked warmly at that woman, and she had even heard a flicker of irritation in his voice.
'He has to pretend like he has feelings for her that he just doesn't have. She may be precious, but Mr. Leo has no intention of falling in love with her. Would he put on an act for the rest of his life? I couldn't! I simply could never do that.'
Although startled by her words, Loke managed to compose himself again. "Hard for me, eh?" He slowly moved away from the closet and sat on the bed. "What makes you say that?"
The emotions surging in Lucy's heart made it difficult, but she forced herself to answer. "Earlier … before … it looked like you were in a bad mood."
"Before?"
"Before you got in the elevator."
His eyes widened, merely a slight move, but Lucy caught the expression change. She realized, she had grown sensitive to his every gesture, yet still she could not figure out the most important answer: what was he feeling?
Even the bed where he now casually sat … to Lucy, it was a special place that brought back memories of their night together. Was it the same to him? Part of her wanted to ask him to make things clear, but part of her feared that doing so might mean this thing they had together would have to end.
'Are we a couple?'
No, surely they weren't that close. She quickly brushed away that faint hope.
'I'm not his girlfriend. Am I just his employee? Boss and employee … no, I think we've strayed far from that path. So, what are we? Lovers? Fuck buddies? I don't know a word for it.'
Their relationship was so complicated now. Living with the ambiguity was too hard, yet she feared that if she tried to label it, it might be lost forever, like a fairy that vanished if you captured it.
'Can I continue with a relationship I can't name? Is that even for me?'
Loke seemed slightly shaken by the mention of the elevator, but he quickly hid whatever he was feeling with a forced smile. "You're bringing her up. I wasn't expecting that. You're pretty interested in her, aren't you?"
"I…"
"Are you not in the mood tonight?"
She stopped her words at the sudden shift in direction. She wanted to clarify things before falling into his arms again, and yet part of her didn't. Even if it was too complicated to slap a label on it, she wanted this thing between them to continue a little longer. She wanted him. She ached to feel him again, both in body and in her heart.
Lucy strode over to the closet and slid the door closed, shutting out that woman's presence. Then slowly, flirtatiously, she sway up to the bed and between Loke's knees. His eyes gleamed as her hands combed through his ginger hair. He not only looked aroused, but relieved. He snatched up her hand, kissed her knuckles, then licked between the spaces, thrusting his tongue through her fingers.
"Come here," he purred.
She knew they were dodging the issue: Aries, Loke's bad mood earlier, Lucy's own emotions and worries, they were ignoring it all, yet neither one mentioned it again.
'I can live with complicated. If clarity means that this relationship ends…'
The feelings of possessiveness and superiority Lucy felt before coming to Loke's apartment, and the ugly feeling of jealousy she felt toward what was on the other side of the closet door, were all shoved aside. Lucy did not want to deal with dark things that night.
She wanted his warmth. She wanted his tongue on other parts of her body. As he began to undress her, and she stared down at him, she knew that what she really wanted at that moment was purely physical.
Emotional things had to be discarded.
Maybe Cana was right: "Just don't get too emotionally involved. Otherwise, you'll only get hurt."
Maybe some things were not allowed between them. Maybe jealousy and possessiveness were forbidden. Maybe emotions were better left out, and the shared connection, the commonality of carnal desire, was all they needed. As Loke kissed her bared belly and groped her breasts through her bra, she knew one thing.
This! This was allowed.
'If our relationship became something forbidden, I'd have to discard this feeling completely. That day will come, but for now … for now…'
She had once called Loke a sneaky scoundrel. The words came back now like a boomerang.
'There's a scoundrel in me, too. I'm the same. I know this is wrong, but I don't care. I don't care that he could be getting married one day. I need him, now, in this moment.'
Loke pulled back and looked up at her in worry. Her shirt was off, his was half undone, his hair a mess from her clutching fingers, yet in those lust-blown eyes, she saw gentle concern. She was not reacting the same, not moaning at the faintest touch like before. She was colder, and he could sense it.
"Should we call it a night?"
Her body ached for him. "Don't stop." The words tumbled from her lips in a whisper so soft, she was not sure if he could even hear it. However, he wrapped her up in his arms and rested his head on her breasts as if in answer.
"If that's what you want."
'Scoundrel…'
She needed this. Her heart was in chaos, her mind had to force itself to shut down, but her body—no—her soul needed this. Whatever this tragic, complicated thing was, she needed it that night, and for as long as it could last.
He let her bra drop and lost himself in her breasts. Lucy closed her eyes, shutting out everything, and finally she moaned at the skillful touches of his fingers plucking her body awake. She pressed up against him, feeling the lump in his trousers harden up as she rubbed him through the fabric. He whispered things as he sucked and tugged on her nipples until she squirmed with need.
"Please," she begged.
He slid her underwear down, she climbed onto his lap, and he lowered his zipper. As she slid down to fill up the emptiness, she knew one thing.
They were the same.
They were both scoundrels.
'… don't get too emotionally involved.'
She shoved emotions aside as she focused on the pleasures of her body. If she was just a mistress or fuck buddy, she could live with that tonight, feeling him thrust up into her, feeling his hands grabbing her hips and tweaking her breasts. As she watched the pleasure on his face, she could focus on simply this, him alone, and not the world he lived in beyond her reach.
He truly was still something celestial and unobtainable, but for tonight, she could accept that.
"Damn, Lucy," he groaned. "So tight."
She could accept the pleasure he gave her, and the fact that she could make him this aroused. She could focus on the tingling in her body, him pounding up into her, the aching in her thighs and tenderness of her breasts. She could think only about his tongue as they switched positions, she laid on the bed, he crawled between her thighs, and his mouth went down on her. She could focus on just him and the nerves coming alive from his burning licks.
"Oh God!" she gasped, clutching his hair and pressing his face in closer as her body trembled.
"Yes, Lucy. Let me hear you."
"Ahh!"
'… don't get too emotionally involved.'
It was just an orgasm. You didn't need emotions to have an orgasm.
He raised onto his knees, his mouth still wet from her. "Lie back, knees up." She obeyed, and he gazed down at her relined body. "So beautiful." Then he pressed into her again, easily sliding inside. "Oh God, you're so wet."
Focus on sex. Focus on pleasure.
"There. Right there. Harder."
Enjoy the physical. Enjoy the sex. Enjoy simply having fun together.
"Oh God, yes. Ah! Ahhh!"
"Shit. Lucy!"
She watched his face in his last frantic struggles, the flush, the gasping mouth, and felt him bursting inside of her. She watched the tension turn to relief, how his muscular body sagged, and then he looked down at her. Those eyes were so tender, and as he touched her face, his smile was so pure.
Don't get too emotionally involved!
She could enjoy the physical without getting emotional.
She could!
"I'm glad you came here tonight." He leaned over and gave her a tender kiss. "I want to see you more."
Don't get…
… No … She couldn't do it. She just couldn't. As she stroked her fingers through his hair and felt the lingering buzz of pleasure through her body, she realized that she had already fallen too deeply in love with him to be cold about this.
She loved him…
He had a fiancée…
No matter how she tried, that fact made her burn with jealousy and ache with sadness. It made her want him even more, and made her feel dark with guilt. So long as he planned to marry another woman, what could Lucy be besides the other woman to him? Even if emotions got in the way, there could never be a lasting future for them. She would always be nothing more than a mistress.
It would always be about good sex, not a good ending.
For now, good sex was all she could have with him. If that was the case, she was not going to hold back. She took his hand and pulled it down between her legs.
He smirked at her boldness. "Do you need more?" he asked, rubbing his fingers around her.
Yes, she need more. More than sex, more than physical, yet she was unsure if that little bit extra even existed for him. It terrified her to think that perhaps it didn't, so for now, more sex was the only thing she could be greedy about.
"Keep at it until I pass out," she demanded.
His eyes gleamed at the challenge. Oh yes, he was not about to back down from that request! His fingers dipped in, and immediately he groaned.
"You're drenched in my cum. Damn, I love to feel you coated with me."
She just wished he would say I love you. Yet he never did. Even as he finger-fucked her into three more orgasms, then had her ride on top until they both came again, then continued to pleasure her in every way he could invent, making her moan and whimper and scream, never once did he say those three words.
Then again, she never said them either. She was scared that emotions were not allowed in this complicated thing they had. Worse, she was terrified that he would scold her with Cana's same words: don't get too emotionally involved.
If Loke ever told her that, she was pretty certain her heart would shatter irreparably, and she would have to call this off to protect herself from misery. She didn't want that! She wanted to stay by his side, whatever that meant. If it involved merely staying in his bed, she would enjoy his warmth, indulge in his body, pleasure him as fiercely as she could, make this the best sex he would ever come to know, and kept those emotions silent in her heart.
Maybe she could not be emotionally uninvolved, but she could be emotionally silent.
He failed in his challenge. He passed out before her, dropping onto the pillow in utter exhaustion, muttering that he could continue after a little rest, and yet plummeting into deep, somnolent breaths in mere seconds. Lucy was smug as she slipped away to shower off sweat and semen, feeling like a victorious lioness. She might not own his heart, but she could ensnare his body. She would make this the best damn sex ever! She would make him crave her.
When she returned and slipped into the blankets, Loke rolled over and grabbed her.
"Lucy," he sighed in his sleep.
That feeling of superiority fizzled out. He could hold her like this after sex, but never any other time. She could come to his home for drinking and sex, but never for just hanging out, cuddling on the couch, watching a movie with a large bowl of popcorn and chocolate candies. She could never hear Loke sigh her name like that or feel his protective arms unless it was coming here as a mistress, or fuck buddy, or whatever she was.
Not a partner. Not a girlfriend. Never could she be that.
Her heart ached, and tears dripped down her eyes. She opened her mouth to say those three words, but she could not bring herself to do it. Saying those three words only after he was asleep and could not hear her was cowardly. She refused to be that sort of woman. She would say it to his face, or not at all.
The problem was, what would happen if she confessed? He had a fiancée!
Why did he have to be engaged? Why did he have to be a world away from her?
Why did she have to fall so deeply in love with a man who could never be hers alone?
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Stellar Mistakes	By : Rhov Category: +. to F > Fairy Tail Views: 14748 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail nor do I make money from this fanfic.

Stellar Mistakes