The Spring Of Drowned Thief

Back to School For Ranma

Ranma woke up the next morning in the guest rooms with a smile on his face. He got up and looked out the window. The grass was just the right shade of green, the sky was that deep blue he liked so much with a few clouds to give it character, the koi were jumping in the in the pond, happily being fed by a hard working Kasumi. Today seemed to be a good day and with a bounce in his step Ranma threw on his favorite clothes and headed for his door. He slid it open with grin on his face ready to face the world. Unfortunately he wasn’t expecting three angry faces waiting on the other side of his door. There was a moment that let Ranma’s picture perfect day turn a little gray as he broke the silence.

“Uhh, what’s wrong?” Nabiki was the first to answer.

“Ranma we need to know. What type of things do you steal?” Ranma was caught off guard and a bit offended.

“What do you mean? I wouldn’t steal from you guys, you’ve all been nice to me and there’s no point in me doing it.” Akane and Soun stayed silent while Nabiki continued.

“Ranma, by chance, are you a kleptomaniac?” Now Ranma was giving the question some serious thought.

“Umm, I might be. What’s missing?” Nabiki pointed to the washroom and simply said.

“Soap, and lots of it. You where the last on in there.” Ranma gave it a thought and then bowed his head in shame.

“Yeeeeeaaaah, sorry about that. I can’t help it some times…” Ranma then started emptying his pockets and to every ones surprise, Ranma took out an alarming amount of well hidden soap and various bathing products. The family looked at the astonishing 3-foot pile on the floor and Ranma stood there twiddling his fingers. Soun spoke up this time.

“Boy! What have you got to say for yourself!?” Ranma got that nervous look on his face and started scratching the back of his head.

“I’m really sorry! Really! It’s a bad habit of mine! If you find any thing else missing just ask me. I really can’t help it!” Ranma did a low bow and shot down stairs. Soun, Akane, and Nabiki all just shook their heads and watched him go.

Ranma was busy eating breakfast with a rather frizzely looking Kasumi whom seemed to give understanding to Ranma’s condition. When the two-person breakfast was almost done a very pissed off Akane and Nabiki came down stairs grumbling. Nabiki grabbed her book bags as well as Akane. Ranma raised an eyebrow and almost went back to finishing off his meal when a super sonic book bag hit him in the back of the head. “YEEEOOOW! WHAT WAS THAT FOR!?”

Akane glared at Ranma and he almost let out a shriek. “Because of YOU we missed breakfast and we’re going to be late for school!” With out missing a beat Ranma asked

“School?”

WACK!

“YEEEOOOW! WHAT WAS THAT FOR!?”

Akane motions Ranma towards the door. “Dad signed you into school last night so we’re going to school together!”

Ranma rubbed the sores on his head and said back. “Ok! Ok damnit! You didn’t have to hit me!” Ranma grabbed his mysterious book bag and started following Akane to school.

The trip was pretty much in silence until Ranma needed to talk. “What’s with the silent treatment all off a sudden?”

Akane gave him a bit of a dirty look and said. “You made me miss breakfast and now I’m going to school looking shabby and hungry. And it’s all your fault!”

Ranma rolled his eyes. “I’ll make it up to you don’t worry.”

It was Akane’s turn to roll her eyes. “Oh yeah. I’m soooo sure you’ll do that.”

Ranma jumped over and in front of her and looked into her eyes with a small smile. “Hey we’re friends right?”

Before Akane could answer she found herself looking straight into a head of red hair, which was turned around looking at her small side-walk-watering-tormentor and giving serious thought of breaking the ‘No Kill’ policy right then and there, but before Ranma could give it more thought, Akane took it upon herself to help Ranma find some hot water and started dragging her to the local clinic.

When they arrived Ranma still hadn’t caught on to why they were there but when Akane said, “Wait here.”

Ranma quickly went to work and in a matter of seconds Akane was back with some hot water talking with a doctor. Ranma was in the exact same position she was in before and Akane introduced Dr. Tofu. Tofu got to see first hand, a Jesenkyo curse hard at work and asked Ranma to come in after school. Ranma agreed glad to see some one didn’t see him as a freak, and soon him and Akane where on their way to school again. Tofu turned around to go back to work when suddenly some thing caught his eye, or to put properly, DIDN’T catch his eye. “Betty…..?”

Ranma and Akane finally made it to school to be greeted by, to Ranma’s surprise, the entire male portion of the student body. Akane then shouted before rushing in for a fight. “I.HATE.BOYS!!!!”

Ranma watched the demolition commence and saw it to be a great show. Ranma positioned himself at the top of the Furikan gate walls and started chowing down on some popcorn he jacked from a vender on the way to school. It was an awesome show, but Ranma had to admit that he hadn’t seen a beating this brutal since the last Rocky movie he saw. Once Akane was the last one standing she turned to where she thought Ranma was helping her, but as it turned out he was just standing behind her eating popcorn. “I was wondering how you got so strong, you must do this every day?”

Akane raised an eyebrow and looked at him. “Weren’t you trying to help me…?” Ranma shook his head and hands.

“Oh, no, no, no. You were enjoying yourself too much. I didn’t want to intrude. Want some popcorn?”

Akane got an angry look and twitched a little. She snagged the bag from Ranma and yelled. “BOYS!!” Ranma was on the receiving end of Akane’s fist when suddenly some guy interrupted Ranma’s beating.

“And who might I ask are you to be so familiar with the fair Akane Tendo?” Ranma gave an examination of the moron with a kendo outfit and a stick. He determined that he was weak and rich.

He took a step forward and said, “I’m Ra-“

“Is it not customary to give ones name first!? Fine! Then let me introduce myself. I am known as…”

And so Kuno talked up a storm while Akane tried telling Ranma to be careful and that he was no match for Kuno. Once the display of linguistics ended Ranma said simply, “The names Ranma Soatome.” And leapt into battle. Ranma soon found out that Kuno was no push over when he had a stick in his hand, due to the sliced tree and collapsed wall, but it was nothing Ranma hadn’t dealt with before. Kuno gave a battle cry as he saw an opening.

“I STRIKE!”

Ranma countered with, “Thanks for the warning!” and dodged easily and came nose to nose with Kuno chasing him back towards the wall. Their eyes were locked, and for some reason Kuno could feel himself become slightly lighter but couldn’t put his finger on it, but was quickly distracted when he saw another opening.

“HYAAA!!!!” Ranma leapt into the sky with another easy dodge and came up with an awesome prank on his way down, but then he caught the raindrops on his face and had to think quickly. Kuno also thought quickly and raised his wooden sword up for a killing blow; the last thing he saw was a smug look on his rivals face and then a skeleton lunging at him.

“YAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGHHHH!!! THE EVIL DEAD HATH RISEN!” Ranma gave the skeleton a shove and locked it onto Kuno’s stick and shoved off towards shelter before the rain struck. Ranma and Akane watched Kuno fight off the evil dead attached to his sword while running around screaming bloody murder.

Then a random student spoke up from inside. “That was a nice kick the skeleton pulled off.” The remaining student body face faulted.

Ranma looked towards Akane and said, “Well that was fun. Time for class!” but just as he turned around.

WHACK!

“YEEEEOOOOWWW! WHAT WAS THAT FOR!?”

Akane gave Ranma a cold hard look. “Don’t steal from Dr. Tofu! Return Betty after school!” Ranma bowed his head in shame and said.

“I’m sorry. Couldn’t help it.” They both walked to class in silence. It came to no surprise that they had to stand in the hall for being late, and was now in the position that they were in. Both Ranma and Akane stood in the hall in silence waiting for the teacher to call them in.

“Thanks a lot Ranma!” Akane whispered. Ranma looked over to his left and raised an eyebrow.

“What?”

“Thanks to you, I not only missed breakfast today, but arrived late! Now I’m going to miss half the lesson this morning!” Akane was growing angrier with each word, but Ranma put a reassuring hand on her shoulder and said.

“I told you I was going to make up for it, and don’t worry, we won’t miss a thing in class.” Akane ignored the fact that one of his buckets was floating shot daggers at Ranma with her eyes and almost too loudly said.

“And how do you know that!?” Ranma once again bowed in shame and pulled out a VERY well hidden stack of lesson books and all the class chalk. Akane just looked at him with lazy eyes…

“Let me guess... You couldn’t help it?” Ranma responded with a low and lazy.

“Yeeeeaaahhhh…” Akane shook her head in disbelief.

“We have GOT to work on that.”

And sounding just as stupid before. “I know…”

A sudden crashing through the hall way caught both their attentions.

(Only a few mins before.)

“What kind of beast is this Ranma Soatome? An evil sorcerer whom raises the dead at his will…”

Nabiki rolled her eyes a little. “Kuno baby, that wasn’t the undead. You are just to simple to know that it was stuck to your bokken.”

Kuno stood in triumph. “HA! That evil sorcerer may have you fooled, but not I! I battled the demon first hand and survived!”

Nabiki started looking tired with trying to explain things to Kuno, but then an idea popped into her head. A way of making a little bit of profit off of the very rich Kuno. “Kuno baby, I got a little bit of information about this Ranma, and even though it may be rumors, I can’t let it go for free.”

Kuno’s attention was grasped instantly. “And what, may I ask, would you know about this Soatome character that could gain you capital?”

Nabiki then looked high and low to make sure no one was listening and came in close to Kuno’s ear. “I didn’t want to say any thing earlier, but I think Ranma is a sorcerer. But if you want details, then you’re going to have to pay up.”

Kuno rubbed his chin in consideration and then said, “DEAL!” and he reached for his wallet. “Hmm. It must have fallen out while I was battling that demon this morning. Fortune is with me though, for I always carry a second…” And some how, from across the school, Ranma’s ears twitched, as if a dog to a whistle, and a small smile appeared on his face as he talk with Akane.

A loud crash was sent through the halls as Kuno came roaring through the halls. He halted and pointed his bokken at Ranma and shouted. “EVIL SORCERER SOATOME! ENSLAVER OF WOMEN! I SHALL NOT LET YOU NOR ANY MAN OTHER THEN MYSELF FOR THAT MATTER, TO WED THE FAIR AKANE TENDO! FOUL SUCCUBUSS!”
Ranma looked over to Akane and asked. “We’re getting married?” Akane just shrugged her shoulders, but the populous of the school had already heard what was said and began doing what every one in Nemira seemed to do best. They all jump to conclusions. A brigade of questioning students quickly demolished the wall behind Ranma and Akane. Quickly Ranma decided to get all this unwanted attention away from him and started to run down the hall.

“C’mon Kuno! Lets take this out side!”

As Ranma and Kuno ran through the halls with the student body close behind them a lone teacher stuck his head out the door and shouted.

“NO RUNNING IN THE HALLS!” which was countered with a, “Yes, Sensei.” From a mass of piled up bodies trying to fit through the halls. Just as the teacher popped back into his classroom to finish up with the last three students in the class he saw all his lesson books on the ground.

“Oh, what luck! Kind of foolish of me to leave them in the hall like this. Hmmmm. Still don’t know where my answer keys are though…”

Running through the halls Ranma kept shouting. “This way Kuno!” and after almost every turn Kuno would rush by the locker Ranma would be hiding in or the roof he’d be clinging to, until he decided he’d had enough fun, and confusing every one was getting old. Ranma got up onto a window ledge and shouted. \"This ways faster Kuno.”

Which the response with. “Let us fly then!”

Akane gasped and yelled, “We’re on the third floor!” But it was too late and the two were out the window. The odd thing was that only the scream of Kuno could be heard, followed by a loud splash as he hit the pool. Fearing the worst, Akane checked to see if Ranma missed the pool and if an ambulance needed to be called, but just as she looked out, she jumped back when Ranma’s face popped back up almost immediately with a big smile.

“Can’t believe he fell for that one…” Right when Ranma got in again the student body swarmed him with questions and thumbs up. He quickly became embarrassed and started backing up.

“Really guys, it was noth- YAAAARRRRGGHHH!!!”

Akane shook her head as she watched Ranma back himself out an open window, and it was completed with a splash. ‘Serves him right…’

Ranma was waiting on the bottom of the pool trying to figure out how to get out of showing his curse to the world. She looked up to see and angry yet comatose Kuno swimming towards her. Ranma was about to start pacing when she felt a hand grab her in a very personal way. Her first reaction was utter rage, but then calmness over took her and slowly a smile crawled across her face. She quickly maneuvered herself in Kuno’s arms so that they were chest to chest and began swimming up as fast as she could. On the way up she started putting tears and rips in her clothes and plenty in the area of her chest. She found the edge of the pool and surfaced fast with a confused Kuno still wrapped around her in a very personal fashion. When she finally caught her breath, she lay under Kuno for a second and screamed.

“EEEEKKKK!! A MOLESTER! HELP! HELP! I’M BEING VIOLATED!!!”

As if on cue the school boxing, and weight lifting clubs came around the corner to examine the scene, and sure enough they saw a poor defenseless women being ogled on by some pervert. If it was time for them to go into action and execute justice upon this pervert, then it was now. As they closed in Kuno let go of Ranma and was at a loss for words. He could have sworn he had his nemesis in his grasp, but he had some how mistaken this beauty beneath him for some one he hated. Kuno opened his mouth.

“I think there has been a misunderstanding here gentlemen…”

A boxer nodded and said. “Hmmm. There might be. Let’s see. A cute girl in clothes that have been savagely ripped, the schools pervert on top of her while she’s screaming for help. I think we got all the proof we need boys. Right!?” There was the sound of knuckles cracking and a loud angry, “HAI!” that followed.

Kuno woke up in the hospital 6 hours later.

Ranma ended up missing the rest of the school day due to a bunch of concerned body builders, pampering her. At around lunchtime, Akane found Ranma with, what seemed to be, her harem of men treating her like a queen.

“You’re really milking this aren’t you?” Ranma got an age-old nervous smile on her face and whispered into Akane’s ear.

“Wouldn’t you?” Akane just looked down and shook her head.

“Honestly Ranma. What are we going to do with you?” Ranma gave a thoughtful look, but decided to change the subject.

“Well, we’ll think of some thing, but I know that right now I have to make up for this morning. C’mon. Let’s go to a restaurant for lunch.” Akane was caught off guard when Ranma took her arm and started leading her into the ‘lunch’ end of town. Just before they left the school, Ranma had managed to find Nabiki and start taking her along as well. Ranma took note of Nabiki selling pictures of Akane to a bunch of boys, and a few random thoughts passed through her head, but nothing solid.

“Ranma, where are you taking me?” She just looked back with a usual smile,

“Well you missed breakfast this morning, so I’m making it up to you and Akane.” Cash signs seemed to appear in Nabiki’s eyes, as a few interesting thoughts passed through her head.
Both Akane and Nabiki where surprised when they arrived at the restaurant. To say it was fancy was somewhat of an understatement; in fact it was one of the most expensive ones in Nemira. They walked in and Ranma said her name and to the other girls surprise, they all had reservations. They were soon seated and holding menus.

Akane started glancing through and gasped at the prices. “A-Are you sure about this Ranma? Every thing here is so expensive.”

Even Nabiki was swooning a little bit. She’d always wanted to dine here, but even she didn’t have that kind of financing to throw around. Ranma gave them both reassuring looks and said, “Don’t worry about it. This is my way of saying sorry about all the trouble I caused, so just enjoy it. Ok?” Both the girls gave it a little bit of thought, but finally nodded in agreement.

Akane tried to stay conservative in her ordering and tried her best to keep things simple and cheap. Nabiki on the other hand, was tearing the menu apart, wanting a taste of every thing this place had to offer. Mid meal came and Akane excused her self to the bathroom, and when she was gone, Ranma wasted no time and started looking at Nabiki.

“Can I help you Ranma?” Nabiki was sure Ranma was about to gripe about the bill, but to her surprise, some thing completely different came up.

“I need to know some thing Nabiki and I need an honest answer.” She raised an eyebrow but gave Ranma the sign to continue. Ranma leaned in close and asked quietly.

“It’s about Akane. I keep getting mixed messages from her, and I’ve noticed that she’s a lot nicer to me when I’m a girl, then when I’m a guy.” Nabiki knew what Ranma was asking, but she felt like dragging the question out of her.

“What are you asking Ranma?” Ranma got a little nervous at having to voice her question, but continued in a low tone.

“Well, umm. When I first got here I couldn’t help but notice her checking me out as a girl, and when we were in the bathroom she seemed more then eager to see me naked, but then she asked me if I liked girls. Obviously I said yes, but before I could explain she freaked out and hit me. I still can’t figure it out. Is she normal, or is she, umm, like THAT.”

Nabiki lowered her head a little and chuckled a little. “Well, since you’re buying me such a nice meal, I guess I can tell you. Akane is ‘in the closet’ so to speak. Most of the school seems to know, but she doesn’t want to accept it.” Ranma started nodding her head in understanding.

“This is starting to make much more sense now. Your sister can be a confusing person at times.” Nabiki raised and eyebrow and gave a sly smile.

“And what about me?” It was Ranma’s turn to chuckle a little. “Well, I can tell you what I know so far.”

As if receiving a challenge letter, Nabiki responded. “Please. I’d love to hear this.” Ranma’s face became just as sly as Nabiki’s.

“Well, I know that you have a love for money, and will do any thing to get it. I noticed you selling pictures of your sister to guys, and it wouldn’t surprise me if you had Kuno pay you to you to tell him that I’m some sort of evil sorcerer. Which I am by the way.” Nabiki rolled her eyes a little bit, but let Ranma continue.

“But I know that you also have a soft side that you don’t like people to see.” This time Nabiki did speak.

“And what makes you say that?” Ranma gave another smile.

“ Thanks for burning the tape. I would have hated to have my shady past brought forth like that.” At this Nabiki’s jaw dropped at this. When she finally collected herself she asked quickly.

“Y-Y-you saw me!? How!?” Ranma gave her a passive look.

“I can do any thing you do sneaky, better. It’s in my nature. That and I caught your foot hanging out of the tree when you slipped. I also saw the red light on the camera. You also left the tree a bit early and saw you light up the tape. Actually I should show you proper procedure in recognizance work. You’re a bit sloppy around the edges, but have good potential...” Ranma was looking up at this point and rubbing her chin thoughtfully.

Before Nabiki could say any thing more, Akane had returned and gave them both a warm smile. When lunch was finally done Ranma went up to pay. Nabiki took note of Kuno’s wallet coming out of Ranma’s shirt, which caused her to laugh a little. Akane never caught on. The rest of the day went on as normal, and uneventful. The only real exciting thing that happened after the day was done was the rumor that a really cute redheaded girl had joined the weight lifting, boxing, and gymnastics clubs. Once Ranma was all signed in he found his friend Betty up in a tree and made his way to Dr. Tofu’s clinic. He held out Betty in front of him and put on a stupid and sarcastic face. “So how was your day?”