Adult-FanFiction.org : Anime

Relax and Hang On -- Again	By : cupnjava Category: Gensomaden Saiyuki > General Views: 20723 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Gensomaden Saiyuki, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 3
- 4
- 5
Relax and Hang On V -- “Learn the Hard Way”

[or] “Your Plan Sucks”

Summary: If you haven’t already guessed, I’ve taken some “creative liberties” with Hakuryuu. I’m about to take some “creative liberties” with why Hakkai was so sad as a child. This chapter expands through the spectrum of humor (hopefully) and angst. If I tell ya if there is sex in it, then I would be ruining the suspense. Is there lemonade in the fridge? I’m not telling. I know I’m getting close to canon. I know I’m pushing the limits and I know some of you are NOT going to like this. I feel the heat from the flames already.
I will let you know there are some heavy issues brought up in this chapter. If you lived through “it” or something like “it” then this chapter may be difficult to read ….then again….maybe not. We’re a strange bunch. There are two “its” in this chapter.
I can’t figure out how to properly “warn” this section with out spoiling it for the ones that don’t like spoilers. One obscure warning : Sexually Predatory Events -- kinda.
I have come to realize after this chapter was written and integrated into the larger story, that this section is socially irresponsible. I apologize for contributing to misperceptions.
Mea Culpa

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Learn the Hard Way” [or] “Your Plan Sucks”
[This picks up right were the one-shot stopped]
Sanzo’s words entered Hakkai’s ears and he slammed his foot down on the accelerator. Hakkai’s body responded instantly. He gripped the steering wheel as his mind raced over a variety of lewd and lascivious activities.
He was officially hot and bothered.
His mind nose-dived right into his pants. He struggled to pull it out. This is not the right time.

Goku whined, “God Hakkai! Why did you do that so hard?”
Hakkai stifled a snicker.
Gojyo was briefly shocked, Did that priest overhear everything? Then, he realized he could have little fun with the mood his lover was no doubt in. “Yeah, you’re jerking me around back here.”
Hakkai bit his lips. Must get my mind out of the gutter.

Sanzo looked over at Hakkai and saw that the brunette was desperately trying to regain control. “I really don‘t think you have to do this so fast.”
Hakkai’s eyes began to tremble. He eased his foot from the accelerator.
Goku rubbed the back of his head, “That shit hurt.”
Hakkai closed his eyes as he heard Gojyo’s words come back to him via Goku’s mouth. He remembered he was driving and popped open his eyes. The jeep swerved.
Gojyo chuckled softly, “If you can’t do it right, then let me take control.”
Hakkai chuckled as his eyes began to water, “Oh… judging by your reaction, I’m doing it right.” The jeep swerved, again.
Sanzo lifted an eyebrow, “Do you think you can keep it straight?”
Hakkai laughed, “No, I don’t that would be appropriate.”
Gojyo squeezed his eyes shut.
Goku yelled, “What the hell is so funny?” Goku’s voice softened, “This is getting strange.”
Gojyo bellowed, “The strange part is coming.” He remembered his promise of creativity.
Hakkai laughed louder, “Or did it already “cum“?” The jeep swerved as Hakkai struggled to drive through his laughing fits.
Goku bounced, “Hakkai! You’re gonna jerk me off this thing!”
One hand slid limply from the steering wheel; his stomach was beginning to ache.
Gojyo howled into the air.
Sanzo bit his lips.
Goku shook his head. He’d change the subject, these jokers were getting out of hand, “Hey, Sanzo, I’m hungry.”
Through the guffaws Hakkai managed to get out, “So, what you telling us, Goku, is that you want something from Sanzo.”
Gojyo wrapped his arms around his waist as he curled into a laughing ball. “Oh god. Stop….it’s too much.”
Hakkai’s body was shaking as he tried desperately to control the jeep.
Sanzo couldn’t allow himself to laugh, so he popped Goku with the fan.
Goku whined, “What was that for? Why do you always focus it on my head?”
Hakkai’s head flew forward as the jeep swerved again.
Gojyo took in a sharp breath, “Stop…you must stop. My face hurts.”
Sanzo pressed his hand to his forehead. They were not going to get anywhere except off road at this rate. He had to put a stop to this, “Hakkai, what the fuck is your problem?”
Hakkai slammed on the breaks and fell out of the jeep. One hand clutching at the side of the vehicle as his legs went laughter-weak. He slumped to the ground, “Exactly.” Hakkai’s eyes streamed, his stomach ached, his face hurt. He was laughing too hard to think.
Goku hopped out of the jeep and knelt beside Hakkai. “Hakkai?”
Between guffaws Hakkai managed to get out, “He said…..then you….then him…then HAHAHAHAHAH!”
Gojyo piped up from the back of the jeep, “And …and…then…then… buuuwwwaaahahahaHAHA!”
Sanzo lit a cigarette, this was going to take a while.
A confused Goku sat on the ground as laughter echoed through the land.
They would calm down, and then one would giggle. That set would the other off and the laughter would build. It would die down and then another giggle. They were indeed stuck in a loop.
Sanzo gritted his teeth. He really couldn’t blame them; he did start it. He just didn’t expect such an intrusive reaction. He just wanted to see Hakkai squirm a bit, was that so wrong? “T’ssss”
Finally, Hakkai staggered to his feet. His chest heaved as he tried to regain his senses.
Gojyo wiped the tears from his eyes as he sat up.
Crimson met Emerald.
Snicker
Snort
Giggle
Laugh
They were down again.
Sanzo stood up and looked west. Fuck it. He’d walk west. He took two steps and realized that was a big, steaming, pile of bullshit. He’d wait.
Goku sighed.
Hakkai and Gojyo managed tentative grips upon themselves. They slowly rose from their laughter and each intentionally avoided eye contact with the other.
Hakkai climbed into the front seat. Sanzo eyed him. Hakkai bit his lips and took in a deep self-collecting breath.
Goku jumped into the backseat as Sanzo sat down.
Hakkai drove off toward west.

Three hours later:
Goku sighed, “I’m hungry.”
Hakkai swallowed, “So tell me, Goku, what is it that you would find satisfying?”

That set Gojyo off.
Gojyo set Hakkai off.
The jeep came to yet another stop.
The gun went off.
The jeep moved again.
“One more word and someone is going to get it!” Sanzo bellowed.
That set Hakkai off.
Hakkai set Gojyo off.
Sanzo cocked the gun.
That calmed everyone down.
They drove in silence.
It took a small miracle, but they did actually make it to the next town and the next inn. This inn had four singles available.
Goku looked down at his empty plates, he wasn’t tired and no one else looked tired, “Hey, ya wanna play a game of cards?”
Hakkai’s erection eventually faded; however, his desires never left him. He wanted to play a game that had nothing to do with cards. He tried to think of an excuse.
Gojyo grinned at Goku, “Sure if ya wanna get beat that badly.”
“I win sometimes.”
Gojyo smiled, “Not at cards.”
“I’ll win tonight.”
Sanzo looked over at Goku and softly shook his head.
Gojyo shrugged, “That sounded like a challenge Chimp. Do you really think you can beat Hakkai?”
Hakkai looked over at Gojyo. He wondered when he got dragged into this.
Goku stood up and glared at Hakkai. “Yeah, I think I can beat you.”
Hakkai sighed, “Go get the cards.”
Goku bounced off toward their rooms.
Gojyo looked at Hakkai, “Do you really think he can find them all by himself?”
Hakkai sighed. “No, I suppose not.” He stood and walked toward the rooms.
As soon as Hakkai was out of ear shot, Sanzo grumbled, “Your plan sucks.”
“Man, I wish you could have seen his face. It was all I could do ---”
“It’s not working. “ Sanzo firmly interrupted Gojyo.
“Do you have a better idea?”
Sanzo stood up. “Yes.”
Gojyo knitted his brow, “What is it?”
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Goku checked the wrong pack…again.
Hakkai went immediately to the correct pack.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sanzo looked over his shoulder as he walked from the table, “He’ll reach a limit.”
“Sanzo, I wouldn’t recommend that.”
Hakkai began to walk down the hall toward the dining room.
Gojyo’s voice rose a bit, “You don’t know him like I do. Listen to me, I can tell you how to work it.”
Hakkai froze in place and pressed his body against the wall, just to the side of the wide doorframe.
Sanzo had his fill of the half-breed half-wit telling him what to do. “Look! What I do to Hakkai is none of your goddamn business!”
Hakkai dropped the cards.
Sanzo stormed from the dining room. His back was to Hakkai the entire way down the hall.
Tenpou reached up and bitch-slapped Hakkai out of the way. Konzen needed some schooling.
Gojyo lit a cigarette confident that the blonde had no idea what he was doing.
Hakkai shifted into the shadows of the hallway and stalked Sanzo down the hall.
Goku trundled down the seemingly empty hallway disappointed that he couldn’t find the cards. He saw a pack lying on the floor and snatched them. He breached the doorframe into the dining hall. “Gottem!” He cheerfully exclaimed.
Gojyo sighed, “Deal.” Where’s Hakkai? Oh shit…. oh fucking well, Sanzo is just going to have to learn this one the hard way.

Sanzo stepped out onto the back deck of the inn. He hoped the cool night air would help him think. He was just going to have to force Hakkai into his own end game. This started out as a joke, but he didn’t like the way Hakkai just took it. He was turning this into a learning experience. Hakkai was going to have to learn to stand up for himself. Hakkai need to ---
Sanzo felt a hand in the back of his hair. His neck snapped back and his back arched. “Goku, goddamn it, I’m not in the mood for this shit.”
Words whispered into Sanzo’s ear, “Not Goku.” That was the second time Hakkai had to say that, Goku must get around.

“Hakkai?” He wasn’t really asking; it just sounded like a question. He knew that voice. He was slightly shocked, although he didn’t know exactly why.
“Yes.” Hakkai adjusted his hands and worked the Fulcrum points on Sanzo’s body. The blonde’s shoulders shifted past his center body mass and he was now completely off balance. Hakkai had him.
“What the fuck are you doing?”
Hakkai used a hand to push a side of Sanzo’s robe down, exposing one creamy white shoulder. Hakkai put his lips next to Sanzo’s skin. “Coming for what has been offered.”
Hakkai parted his lips and pressed his teeth into Sanzo’s shoulder.
Sanzo gasped. “That hurts.”
“Yes. Isn’t it wonderful?” Hakkai slid a hand down Sanzo’s spine. His fingers danced over the robe and tucked under Sanzo’s black belt. Hakkai applied pressure.
Sanzo’s legs fell out from under him. “Stop it Hakkai!”
Hakkai lowered the blonde to the floor. Sanzo pushed his arms out to protect his face. Hakkai slid a hand between the folds of Priest’s robes. He rubbed the crotch of Sanzo’s pants. “You know I can take you.” He lifted Sanzo’s hips.
All of a sudden, Gojyo’s plan didn’t suck so much.
Hakkai used his feet and knees to separate Sanzo’s legs. He pushed his hips against Sanzo’s ass. “And, there is nothing you can do about it.”
Sanzo tried his best to turn his head to look at this stranger in a friend’s body. The grip on the back of his head prevented the necessary movement. He knew he could get Hakkai to back down with a flash of violet, but he couldn’t get the violet there.
Hakkai started to hike-up Sanzo’s robe.
“Damn it, Hakkai! I said stop!”
Hakkai nipped at Sanzo‘s ear and whispered, “You know, right now I could do anything I want to you.”
Hakkai pushed Sanzo fully to the ground. He released Sanzo’s hair and stood up. He began to walk away. He looked over his shoulder. “Remember that the next time you feel the need to …” Hakkai wanted to say, ‘screw with my emotions’. Tenpou wanted to say, ‘cause an issue.’ Gonou wanted to say, ‘toy with me’. However, to everyone’s shock, it was Him that won out.
A deep low voice cut the night air, “…fuck with my head.” Emerald eyes flashed dark as Hakkai turned to walk back into the inn.
Sanzo felt sensation slowly return to his legs. “About time you let your balls drop.”
Hakkai stopped. “I’m no so small anymore, Priest. Do you really want to continue to push me?” He did not turn around.
“Try that shit again and I will kill you.”
“If you really wanted me to stop, you would have reached for the gun by now.” Hakkai stepped inside the inn.
Sanzo felt the blood leave his face. Was he really that transparent? He was equally torn between wanting to shoot Hakkai and asking him to come back. As he slowly and clumsily stood on his wobbly legs, he confirmed his silent promise to his friends. He’d kill them before he’d let the darkness take them.
Hakkai began to walk down the hall. Is that what it has come down to? People just think they can do whatever it is they want to me, and I’ll just go along with it? Little Gonou dropped down and tucked his knees to his chest. He pressed his forehead to his knees. Hakkai bent down and wrapped his arms around the wounded child. Someone needed to comfort the poor thing. I am a fool. Have I become the little party favor of the group? Is that why Gojyo came to my room that night? Cheap words wouldn’t work on anyone else and I fell for it?

He opened the door to his room and it slammed shut. He kicked off his shoes and sat down on the bed. He snatched the pillow and clutched it to his chest. He rested his back against the headboard and tucked his knees up -- sandwiching the pillow between his chest and his legs. He tried to hug himself…to comfort himself as the bitter tinge of broken trust and teetering betrayal permeated his senses. How could he -- as smart as he is-- have fallen for Gojyo’s plan? Why did he consistently and repeatedly hurt himself? When would he learn ….let no one in? When would he learn, one only fails when one tries? No trying means no failing. No failing means no hurting. When would he just accept everyone hurts him…they all hurt…as soon as he cares they hurt?

They do this because we are stupid. We allow this and we are fools.

No….that can’t be right…could it? Trust…trust….that little voice might very well have a point about trust.
Tenpou softly shook his head. For once, the brilliant man knew not what to do.

Hakuryuu had curled up on the table for a brief nap beside to a not-so-peaceful game of Gin Rummy. He heard a door slam and lifted his head.
Gojyo heard the door slam and set his cards on the table. He was going to have to fix whatever that was all about.
Goku pouted, “Quitting? Afraid your going to lose?”
“The score is 85 to 10. You can’t come back from that, Monkey.” The sentence was more of an afterthought as his mind raced over what the problem could be this time. He would check on Hakkai first.
Hakuryuu followed him down the hall.
Gojyo knocked lightly on Hakkai’s door. There was no answer. He slowly opened it.
Hakkai whipped his head up and hurled the pillow at the intruder.
“Hakkai! It’s me! Gojyo!”
Hakkai had already jumped from the bed and a shoe was on its way.
Gojyo ducked.
Hakuryuu flew to the other side of the room.
Hakkai snatched his other shoe.
Gojyo just got the door closed before he heard a loud thud; followed immediately, by the click of the door being locked.
Hakkai fell to the bed and wadded the bedspread into his arms as he curled into a ball. So, that’s what people think. They can just show up in my bedroom anytime they want. And, I’m just suppose to accept it? When’s Goku going to show up for his turn?

If he didn’t trust, he wouldn’t care. If he doesn’t care, he doesn’t hurt. Let no one in.

We are the only ones that can protect ourselves. Let no one in…let no one hurt.

Hakuryuu’s head dipped as he watched Hakkai. He landed softly and quietly on the table.
Gojyo gritted his teeth. He was going to find Sanzo right fucking now. He stormed down the hall to Sanzo’s room. He turned the door knob , “I’m coming in, Monk!”
The room was empty. Gojyo turned around and slammed the door behind him.
“Looking for me?”
Gojyo looked up and saw the smug bastard walking toward him. He jutted his arms out, grabbed two fistfuls of robe and snatched the shorter man up on his toes. “What the fuck did you do to Hakkai?”
Sanzo sneered, “What did I do to him? You have that backwards, cretin.”
Gojyo knitted his brow and released Sanzo. “What?”
Sanzo straightened his robes, “I didn’t do shit to him since the comment this morning.” Sanzo turned to go into his room. As he shut the door in the face of a dumbstruck Gojyo, he mumbled, “It’s over.”
Gojyo looked down the hall at Hakkai’s door.
Goku rounded the corner and saw Gojyo standing at Sanzo’s closed door. He felt the tension in the air. He knew something was going on. He knew something had been going on for a while, but no one would tell him. “What’s happened?” He asked the closest person he had to an older brother.
Gojyo looked down at Goku there was no need to burden him with this. “Never mind, Goku.”
Goku yelled, “Why is it always ‘never mind Goku’!? Why won’t you tell me anything?”
Gojyo looked into the confused golden eyes, “You have enough on you. You don’t need to worry about this.”
Goku’s jaw set, “Gojyo, damn it. I’m not a child.”
Gojyo smiled, “No, you’re a monkey.”
“Don’t call me a monkey!”
Gojyo walked toward Hakkai’s door. His job with Goku was done. If only getting Hakkai to feel better was that easy.
Goku opened Sanzo’s door, “What’s going on, Sanzo?”
Sanzo huffed, “It is not for you to worry about, Goku.”
“I am so sick of this shit!” Goku stormed from Sanzo’s room and slammed the door to his own room.
Gojyo knocked on Hakkai’s door. He expected no answer. He tried the knob and he expected it to be locked. “Can we talk?”
Silence.
“I’m going to wait here until you open this door.”
Silence.
“I mean it.”
Silence.
Gojyo felt all the work he’d put in fading. He felt the emotional wall being fortified around Hakkai. He felt his friend slipping away. He felt the cold hard door against his palms and forehead. He felt his eyes sting as he realized he needed Hakkai more than Hakkai needed him. A thought escaped his mouth, “Don’t close off from me…please.”
Click.
Gojyo opened the door and saw Hakkai curled up on the bed. Hakuryuu was flying back to the table. He landed on the table and looked over at Gojyo. You owe me one, General.

Gojyo bent down and picked the pillow up off the floor. If emerald wasn’t going to come to crimson. Crimson was going to go to emerald.
He sat the pillow on the bed and curled up behind Hakkai. He wrapped his arms around Hakkai. He didn’t know what exactly was going on, but he knew his friend was hurting. Being held always made him feel better, it should work for Hakkai.
Gojyo held Hakkai. Hakkai held Gonou. Sanzo opened Goku’s door.
Gojyo stared into the darkness and felt Hakkai tremble. He realized there was one thing he hated more than a woman crying and that was Hakkai crying.
Hakkai was so lost in a town named Hurt, he didn’t realize he was voicing his thoughts.
A tiny voice emerged from Little Gonou, “I don’t like that.”
Hakkai rubbed his shoulder, “Yes, yes, I know.”
Gojyo listened to Hakkai’s soft mumblings.
“But he was going to hurt us.”
Hakkai wondered if that chain on Him was strong enough, “Yes, yes, I know.”
“We had to protect ourselves.”
Gojyo noted these mumblings were in first person plural. He began to wonder how messed up Hakkai really was.
Hakkai looked over at Tenpou, “There were better options.”
Tenpou shrugged. “That wasn’t all me.”
Hakkai lifted an eyebrow. “I know. Even you wouldn’t say that, but you carry the key.”
Little Gonou softly sobbed, “It was me. I relaxed the chain.”
Gojyo was getting pretty nervous about what he’d missed. He remembered that Sanzo was still breathing when he saw him. That was a good sign.
Hakkai relaxed his hug around Gonou and looked in to the large green eyes. “You?” Hakkai was thankful that the young him had the wherewithal to only relax the chain and not release it.
Tears welled up in Gonou’s eyes, “I had to. He was going to hurt us. Like …like….before…” Gonou’s voice floated off into a sea of sobs.
Hakkai held the child close. Adult Gonou bent over and looked at Hakkai, “Have you forgotten why we were so sad so young?”
Tenpou knew that Hakkai had forgotten; he’d made sure of it. He eyed the ornate chest behind him. The dust was thick.
Hakkai’s mumbles faded as the world came into existence around him.
Gojyo stared into the darkness. He blinked. He was confused.
Hakkai felt Gojyo behind him. He whipped a hand behind him and pushed. Gojyo let out a sharp jet of air and Hakkai propelled himself to the floor. He landed face first with a thud and quickly stood up. “So, that is how it is.”
Gojyo forced air back in to his lungs, “What?”
Hakkai smiled a real big smile. “Let me ask you something. Should I just obediently remove my clothes whenever you walk into the room or are you going to give me some kind of code word?”

A cloud of dust emerged from behind Tenpou.
Gojyo sat up and shook his head. He ran a hand through his hair. “What?” Gojyo noted the sickeningly polite tone to Hakkai’s voice. This is not good.
The smile got bigger and more strained, “Obviously, Sanzo thinks I need to be available to him. Where does Goku fit into all of this? I suppose I need to get a calendar so I can keep track of whose bitch I am on what night. Or are you keeping track of all the arrangements?”
Normally, Gojyo could figure out which Hakkai he was dealing with and smooth out the situation. He couldn’t tell this time. He didn’t know what -- rather who -- he was dealing with. He’d have to wing it. He did know that those emerald eyes were teetering on their limit. He stood up and walked across the room toward Hakkai, “What happened with Sanzo? What’s going on?”
Hakkai closed his eyes and his lips trembled as he put more force behind the smile. He opened his eyes and his voice took a soft sweet tone, “Oh, want to know the details of your little date for me? Want to know if Sanzo worked it the way you wanted. It … I’m an it now?”

The chest behind Tenpou rattled.
The blood left Gojyo’s face, “You heard the wrong part of a conversation.”
“Is that so?” The smile finally broke. Hakkai tilted his head down and closed his eyes. He pressed his hands to his face, “I trusted you.” His knees buckled and he sat on the floor. He brought his knees up to his chest. His voice went pitifully small, “I trusted all of you.” He lifted his head from his hands, “I let you in.”

The lock on the chest behind Tenpou clanked.
Gojyo knew there had to be more to this. He knew this was rooted deep within Hakkai. He knew this was more than misunderstanding a sentence and Sanzo’s twisted little joke. “Hakkai,” Gojyo sat on the floor next to Hakkai and put a hand on the brunette’s shoulder. “Why were you so sad as a child?”
Hakkai’s eyes flickered. His face clenched. He whipped a hand to Gojyo’s shirt and grabbed a fistful of clothing, “I will not be passed around. I will not be a fool!” He shoved Gojyo back.
Gojyo rolled back and righted himself. He looked at Hakkai. “Was it a priest at that damn orphanage? Several priests? Did the nuns know? Did they care? Did they know that‘s the hypocrisy you saw?” Gojyo flung questions at Hakkai that he knew weren’t going to be answered.

The chest opened and papers flew out. They circled.

Tenpou snatched what he could as the papers

flung themselves toward Hakkai.
Hakkai was suddenly silent. His eyes trembled as his pupils transitioned to tiny pinpoints. His mouth hung open as Gojyo read from a book Hakkai didn’t know was written.
Crimson eyes dove into emerald, “That one nun. She tried to help. That’s why she wanted you to go to a different school.” Hakkai’s fierce reactions to Sanzo were becoming more and more clear.
Hakkai was inundated with half memories and partial emotions. A flicker of dark fabric. Footsteps. Fear. The tinge of salt. The blink of candlelight. Shame. A waft of incense. A touch. A whisper. Broken trust. Pain. A threat. Crimson. Confusion. Deep shame. Rain. Sadness. Repetition. Rain -- always with the rain.
Hakkai closed his mouth and eyes as he tried to make sense of what his mind was trying to tell him. He muttered, “How?”
Gojyo wrapped his arms around Hakkai, “Were not so different, you and I.”
He and Hakkai were very different and yet very much the same. Both because of age, innocence and vulnerability --- one because of race and one because of solitude. Differences in origin and trajectory. Differences in magnitude. Differences in release. One escaped and one rescued. Both scenarios begat from sickness. Both cases severe…both deep….both cut….both with scars.

Both… Fated… Harbors.
Hakkai pressed his head into Gojyo’s chest and cried. He cried tears that needed to be let out since ….since that time. Little Gonou disappeared in Hakkai’s arms. That was one fracture that was healing.
Both in tears -- all healing --- slowly….excruciatingly slow.
Gojyo scooped Hakkai up in his arms and carried him to the bed. He laid Hakkai gently on the bed and moved to curled up with him. Hakkai clutched at Gojyo’s shirt. Hakkai was not going to let Gojyo move from him. Gojyo crawled over Hakkai and curled up behind him.
Hakkai turned toward Gojyo and pushed himself into his crimson harbor. He tried to hide within Gojyo. Gojyo wrapped his arms tightly around his broken lover.
Minutes became hours. Eventually, Hakkai’s weeping quieted and he softly whimpered, “Make love to me.” One is guaranteed to fail if one never tries.

Gojyo smiled and rubbed Hakkai’s back, “To you? No. That’s not why I‘m here.”
Wet green eyes met with worried red. “With me. Please.” Those that never light the candle for fear of fire, never enjoy the flame.

Gojyo didn’t like where this was going. He didn’t need his warped type of therapy spreading. “Why?”
Hakkai blinked, “I don’t know.” He didn’t expect that question.
“To forget?”
“No.”
“To remember?”
“No.”
“To feel?”
“A little, yeah. But mainly… to be with you.”
Gojyo whispered, “You need to know that’s not why I came here tonight.”
Hakkai arched his head back and whispered, “I know,” as Gojyo nibbled on his neck.
Hakkai needed to be held. He needed to be loved. He needed Gojyo’s touch.
Hakkai tugged at the back of Gojyo’s shirt and felt it gently release from the unusual waist band. He slid his hands up his lover’s back.
Gojyo slipped his hands under the green shirt and his fingers glided across Hakkai’s chest.
Hakkai pulled on Gojyo’s shirts. Gojyo arched his back to ease their removal. Crimson strands danced in the air as they shook themselves free. Hakkai smiled as he realized some things never change.
Gojyo’s nimble fingers worked Hakkai’s clasps. He tugged on the green material and in short order Hakkai’s chest was free of its binds. Gojyo wrapped his arms around Hakkai’s back and pressed his cheek against the other man’s chest. He paused listening to the soft heartbeat.

Tha-thump…. Tha-thump…..
Hakkai trailed his hands up Gojyo’s back and tangled into the silky crimson strands.
Gojyo propped himself up on his arms and smiled at Hakkai. “I’ll be right back. We need some…supplies.” He winked at Hakkai.
Hakkai winked back, “My pack is right over there.”
“Your pack?” Gojyo expected to have to go his room.
“Yes, my pack.”
Gojyo rolled off the bed and quickly found his footing on the cool floor. He lit a candle and located Hakkai’s pack. He opened it and dug through until he found a small pouch. He held it up. “This one?”
“Nope. That’s the real toiletry bag.”
Gojyo chuckled. He’d never used a phrase like “toiletry bag” before Hakkai came into his life. It was always “a bag” here he kept “his shit”. Now, he had a “toiletry bag” and “products”. He thought it was funny how Hakkai was the one that had difficulties accepting his own bi-sexuality. He dug through the pack again and found a slightly larger, red, leather bag. “This it?”
“Yep.”
“It’s heavy. What do you have in here?”
Hakkai laughed. “You’ll find out.”
Gojyo sat down on the bed. Hakkai propped himself up on his elbows. Gojyo pushed the bag away as he dove into Hakkai’s chest. “What have I told you about sitting like that?”
Hakkai rolled his head back as he laughed, “Don’t you want to know what’s in the bag?”
“Sorry, can’t stop now.”
Gojyo slowly pushed Hakkai back, his lips and tongue attacked Hakkai’s neck, chest and stomach.
Hakkai took in a sweet breath. “The bag.”
“Not hearing you. No control.”
Hakkai laughed. It was good to be wanted -- in a healthy way.
Gojyo tongued the scar and Hakkai’s belly button.
Hakkai squirmed and chuckled. “That tickles.”
Gojyo worked Hakkai’s pants’ button and spread the waistband open. He tugged at the thick khaki fabric. Hakkai lifted his hips as Gojyo pulled his pants and boxers off. Gojyo squared himself between Hakkai’s knees.
Hakkai raised his eyebrows, “The bag and your pants.”
Gojyo smiled, “Oh yeah.” Gojyo stood to remove the last of his clothing and sat down next to Hakkai.
Hakkai laid back looking at the ceiling mindlessly trailing his fingers on his stomach.
Gojyo paused and his eyes scanned his lover. Hakkai was laying on the bed , naked, relaxed and open. Gojyo smiled. “You’ve come a long way in just a few months, Emerald.”
Hakkai cut his eyes toward Gojyo and slowly moved his hand to his own cock.
Gojyo’s eyes widened.
“Are you going to look in the bag or what?”
“Are you going to let me?”
Hakkai softly chuckled as he stopped stroking himself.
Gojyo finally opened the bag. His eyes narrowed, “You closeted freak.”
Hakkai laughed. “You mentioned creativity.”
Gojyo pulled out several books. He read the titles aloud. “ ‘Come Play With Me’ , ‘203 Ways to Drive a Man Wild in Bed’ , the sequel ‘302 Advanced Techniques’ , ‘SM 101’ , ‘The Loving Dominant’ . ‘The Slave’ , ‘O’ by M. Where did you find that?”
Hakkai smiled, “I have connections when it comes to books.” Tenpou chuckled.
Gojyo shook his head, “You can’t just find that anywhere.”
“Yes, yes, I know.”
Gojyo opened ‘O’ , “I can’t believe you found this.”
Hakkai blinked as he realized Gojyo was reading. Now, was not the time for reading. Hakkai propped himself up on his elbows.
The book slid from Gojyo’s fingers. Gojyo dove once again into Hakkai’s torso.
Hakkai slipped a hand into the bag. He realized he would have to be one to get the necessary item. His fingers worked past various tubes and bottles, strips of fabric, fuzzy items, metal items, silky items, hard items, soft items, a strand of faux pearls, clamps that Gojyo didn’t get to see and finally found the shape of the tube he wanted.
He pulled out the tube and shoved the other items onto the floor.
Gojyo moved his lips and tongue from Hakkai’s shoulder to his neck. He slid across Hakkai’s skin and lapped at the front of Hakkai’s throat. He ran his tongue along the underside of his lover’s jaw and over the curve of his chin. Lips found lips. Tongues found tongues.
Eyes fluttered. Breaths hitched. Throats moaned.
Hakkai rocked his hips into Gojyo’s. Hakkai trailed an ankle up Gojyo’s leg and he bent his knee to draw the man closer. He wrapped his arms around Gojyo’s shoulders and worked the cap off the tube. He poured a small amount of the red liquid in to his palm. He screwed the cap back on and rubbed his palms together.
Gojyo nipped, licked and kissed his way across Hakkai’s shoulders and neck. His hands danced into short dark locks. His hips rocked.
Hakkai could feel the warm breath on his skin and let out a soft moan. He slipped his hands between their flesh and wrapped his slicked skin around Gojyo’s large firm cock.
Gojyo’s eyes popped open, his head flew back and he took in a long lustful breath as the cool liquid enveloped his member.
Hakkai turned and twisted his fingers around Gojyo.
Gojyo’s shoulders began to drop. His face softened.
Hakkai rubbed.
Gojyo let out a long soft moan.
The warmth from the oil had kicked in.
Sanzo left Goku’s room, at least the Monkey had stopped pouting.
The corners of Gojyo’s mouth up-turned slightly, for he knew that Hakkai had made a slight miscalculation. He debated briefly on saying something, but figured Hakkai would have to learn this lesson -- the hard way. The same way he once did….

…via trial and error.
Hakkai whispered, “You like?”
Gojyo purred, “Yes.” But you won’t.

Gojyo cradled Hakkai’s arms in his shoulders and squared his hips.
Hakkai tilted his hips slightly to ease the entrance.
Gojyo whispered softly while teasing Hakkai’s ear with the tip of his tongue, “Just relax and hang on.“

Tha-thumpa--Tha-thumpa--Tha-thumpa--Tha-thumpa
He shifted his hips and penetrated Hakkai.

Hakkai cried out, “Oh dear GOD!” ,as the heat from the warming oil flooded his insides.
Sanzo stopped his hand a fraction of an inch from the door. He figured this was not a good time to talk. He turned sharply and walked down the hall.
Gojyo chuckled, “Didn’t think about that did you?”
Hakkai let out a sharp whimper and hissed, “No.”
Gojyo growled softly as he began stroking. The oil got warmer with every stroke.
Hakkai twisted and writhed under Gojyo trying to escape the powerful heat from which there was no outlet.
Gojyo rocked softly and gently into Hakkai. He was going to let this last a while.
Hakkai’s hands clenched into Gojyo’s shoulders. “G---Go--Gojyo!” Hakkai pressed his heels into the mattress trying to get closer to his lover.
Gojyo shifted his hips back. He loved teasing that sweet demon. Hands slid down Gojyo’s sides and fingers gripped his hips.
“T---t---too hot,” finally left Hakkai’s lips. The searing sensation began to make his eyes water. His lips trembled.
Gojyo maintained his slow steady rhythm. Fingernails dug into his hips.
Hakkai’s eyes slammed shut and his head pushed into the pillow. “Gojyo!” His head rolled from side to side, “Stop…you have to stop.”
Gojyo teethed Hakkai’s non-cuffed ear, “Oh no.” His voice was sweet and slightly mocking, “You started this you gotta finish it.”
“It burns.”
“I have faith in you, you can take it.” Gojyo figured it was as much fun saying those words as hearing them.
Hakkai spewed some incompressible sounds as he tried to tug on Gojyo’s hips. He was trying to speed the process, but Gojyo’s muscles held fast.
Gojyo knew he had one of two options. One, slow with tolerable heat, but for a long period of time. Or two, fast with impossible heat , but for a short period. He knew. He knew the faster he moved the hotter the oil got.
Hakkai wasn’t the only one swimming in searing passion. Gojyo was enveloped in the heat of the oil and the heat of Hakkai. His mind swam and his blood danced to the rhythm of Hakkai moans, pleas and whimpers. Oh, how he’d longed to be cause of such beautiful singing from that dainty throat.
Hakkai bucked his hips and pulled on Gojyo’s hips.
Gojyo snickered, “Trying to out freak the freak are you?” If Gojyo could have one wish right now…if he could have anything in the world right now…it would be for a bucket of softy-rounded ice.
A glow emerged on the night stand. When it receded, Gojyo had his wish. The Merciful Goddess howled.
Jiroshin cringed, “My Lady, the things you do. Why must you encourage them?”
“Oh, loosen up, Jiroshin.”
Gojyo smiled. He didn’t question gifts from heaven. One hand left Hakkai’s shoulder and made its way to the cold, hard puddles of water. He palmed several cubes and slowly backed his hips.
Hakkai whimpered and sighed with relief as Gojyo left his depths. “Oh my g--ga---erk” Hakkai’s eyes flew open as the cold conflicted with the heat.
Gojyo pushed in two more cubes.
Hakkai arched from the bed.
Gojyo squared his hips and re-entered Hakkai. His eyes crossed as the cold and heat tangled.
Hakkai’s mind flashed to white as opposite ends of the spectrum went to all out war inside his body. Cold clashed with heat. Heat argued with cold. Each side taking and giving hits. Each side had casualties and victors.
Hakkai’s nails scraped into Gojyo’s skin as his mouth opened for a silent yell.
Gojyo gripped Hakkai’s shoulders for leverage and offered up the speed the demon wanted.
Hakkai’s body began to tremble as he took in a sharp breath. His legs kicked and his body nearly came off the bed. TNT for the brain…and the body. He nearly bucked Gojyo off him as he came.
Gojyo watched the civil war beneath him and continued his thrusts.
The ice melted and was absorbed by Hakkai’s body. Heat came back with vengance.
Hakkai cried out.

Gojyo panted.
Hakkai moaned.

Gojyo groaned.
Friction built heat of two kinds.
Gojyo gritted his teeth, and his eyes slammed shut. It took a lot of will power, but he suppressed his orgasm. He wasn’t done tortur -- teas -- play--- pleasuring Hakkai.
Gojyo looked around on the bed for the tube. He paused, but did not pull out, as he unscrewed the cap.
Hakkai writhed and slid along the bedding under and around Gojyo.
Gojyo smiled as the paused to watch Hakkai fuck himself, with his dick -- he could use this. He loved Hakkai like this, open, willing and free. Ah hell, he loved Hakkai period.
He poured a tiny amount of the liquid onto his fingers and worked the cap back on. He rubbed his fingers together and sought out Hakkai’s cock, which was already getting sticky with spent seed.
He wrapped his slicked fingers around Hakkai and Hakkai moaned at the tricky, fleeting coolness that warming oil offered skin.
Hakkai dug his heels into the mattress and pushed his hips against Gojyo.
Crimson locked with emerald. Crimson spoke slowly and firmly, “Relax and Hang on.”
Hakkai screamed as he arched off the bed. Pleasure exploded within him and his hands slapped into the bedding. Fists balled-up covers and he swore he heard angels sing.
Tenpou hid the conductor’s baton behind his back and tried to look innocent. Kenren offered a rice-wine toast.
Hakkai’s flaccid member, nearly instantly, was not. Gojyo quickly found his rhythm and stroked around Hakkai as he stroked into Hakkai.
Gojyo rested back slightly and focused on stroking Hakkai’s cock. Hakkai bucked and rocked his hips meeting Gojyo’s strokes --- essentially fucking himself. Gojyo swam in the erotic dance. He sped up his strokes.
Hakkai’s eyes few open. “Too hot!” He yelled.
Gojyo huffed, “Oh really?” He released Hakkai’s cock and grabbed two ice cubes. He gripped Hakkai again and stroked in earnest. War maps were dusted off.
Hakkai gasped, “Too cold!”
Gojyo chuckled, “Would you make up your mind?” He never stopped his strokes.
C v/s H -- the second campaign -- had just begun. Both sides called in reinforcements. Both sides took more casualties and both sides had more victors.
Gojyo was nearly drowning in the pleasure of his lover. For Gojyo his own physical pleasure was secondary (mental pleasure was a different story). It was a nice side-effect. His true concern was for his partner -- particullary this very special partner.
Hakkai’s face went red as he screamed and howled in pleasure. His body jerked and cannons went off. He shook and trembled as he he recoiled from orgasm.
Gojyo tilted his head down confident with the knowledge Hakkai was happy he decdied it was all right for him to finish. He gripped Hakkai’s hips and bucked into him.
He bounced over Hakkai. Crimson strands floated and whipped in the air. Eyes locked together through the dimness of room. His head flew back as his euphoria shot through him like lightening across a stormy Montana sky.
His shoulders quaked as his frenzied pleas faded into the air. He rolled his head forward and floated down onto Hakkai.
Hakkai relaxed his legs and his fingers found the soft crimson strands. Faces turned and lips met in a breathy heated kiss.
This kissed ended with a soft moan from both men and Gojyo titled his hips. The rude air dared to come between them once again. Hakkai whimpered in protest.
Gojyo opened his mouth to speak and Hakkai stopped him with a hand flourish. “I’ll get it this time.”
Gojyo tilted an eyebrow. Do you always have to learn the hard way?

Gojyo rolled to the side and sat upon the bed with one leg out and one leg cocked. He rested an elbow on his knee and wished for his cigarettes. No glowing light this time.
Hakkai tried to sit up. Pain and discomfort jolted through him as he rolled onto the floor. He landed with a thud -- face first -- for the second time tonight. He pushed himself up on his hands and knees.
Gojyo grinned , “Oooo stay just like that.”
Hakkai chuckled as he pulled on the bed to right himself, “No, I don’t think so.” His knees and hips betrayed him as he crashed onto the bed.
Gojyo laughed as he stood, “Wait right there, I’ll go get you a towel.”
Hakkai mumbled as his head reeled, “Yeah, why don’t you do that. Good idea.”
As Gojyo passed the ice bucket he snagged two cubes and popped them in his mouth. As they melted, water turned to rice-wine.
Kenren tried to look innocent.
Gojyo returned with the towel. After a modest effort at cleanliness, the two men talked as they enjoyed their rice-wine ice. They talked about everything and nothing.
Gojyo assumed Hakkai knew, that Sanzo knew and didn’t feel the need to bring it up.
They slid between the sheets and curled into each other. Hakkai wrapped his arms tightly around Gojyo and whispered, “Don’t leave me.”
Gojyo smiled as he thought that was his line. ”Sure”
Hakkai didn’t mean just tonight, he meant ever. He needed Gojyo tonight, tomorrow night and every night after that --- to forget …to remember…to feel…to love…to let in.
If one was going to succeed --ever-- one had to try.
Two more wishes were granted the next morning, and they had nothing to do with divine intervention --- well maybe a little --- a very, very long time ago.
Crimson woke to emerald.

Emerald woke to crimson.
Groggy smiles formed.

It was the best morning ever.
They peeled themselves from each other and Hakkai tried standing again. His hips resisted a little, but complied.
The men slipped into pajamas and Hakkai chuckled at the irony.
Hakkai picked up his real toiletry bag. Gojyo grabbed “his shit” and lit a smoke. They walked toward the shower room.
Hakkai appreciated the voices being quiet for once.
After moning necessities, they walked down to the dining room. Coffee steam mixed with cigarette smoke as the two lovers waited for the other “partners in crime” to join them.
Hakkai pulled out the map and scanned it. Gojyo just watched the emerald paramour concentrate. He liked how the skin around Hakkai’s eyes tightened as he thought. He loved to watch the glimmer of white and subtle twitches as he worried his lips. Was there time? Probably not. He sighed as he tried to suppress his urges.
Hakkai pulled out a red pencil and drew a line to the current location. His eyes darted east and back west. East. West. East. West. He felt the blood leave his face and stifled a laugh.
Gojyo raised and eyebrow, “What is it?”
A nervous, “Nothing. It is nothing.” left Hakkai’s mouth. His voice was slightly hoarse.
Sanzo would kill him. They would have BEEN THERE by now if hadn’t been for that one wrong turn -- how long ago? He quickly folded the map. “We --uh-- have one day to the next town.” Hakkai wasn’t all that sure.
Gojyo shrugged. If Hakkai said it was nothing, then it was nothing. “Ok.”
Hakkai looked into his coffee. He thought about last night. He felt what little blood that left in his face leave. “Well, Gojyo I guess this is good-bye.”
Gojyo choked on his coffee, “Your leaving us? You can’t leave us. You can‘t leave me.” Gojyo wondered what he did wrong.
“Sanzo is going to kill me. For last night, Sanzo is going to kill me.”
Gojyo caught his voice and laughed, “Oh, I don’t think you have to worry about Sanzo anymore.”
Hakkai was too focused on certain death to get the gist of what Gojyo said.
Sanzo walked into the dining room with Goku close at his heels. “You idiots ready? I want to do some distance today.”
“But I haven’t have breakfast!”
“Get something to GO.” The fan flew.
Goku whined.
Gojyo smiled. Yep, normality.

They got breakfast and coffee to go. Hakkai stepped out into the morning sun and stretched his arms out. “What a glorious morning.” He was thankful to still be breathing -- among other things.
Sanzo stepped beside him, “Yes. Not too hot or too cold.” He was done with his twisted joke, but if they were going to give him ammuniton…he was going to use it.

Reviewer feedback:

************************************CORRECTION*************************************

Nozomi’s reviewer’s feedback should have read -- I’m glad I have entertained NOT entrained. I’m sorry if this auto-corrected typo has caused any offense. ENTERTAINED ---sheesh….that slip up sure could get ugly.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mzblue 2004-08-19

ooooooo you've done it now. Talk about making a person squirm, this fic was a killer. Multiple personalities & multiple orgasms galore. I love the way you've captured Hakkai's psychological state of mind. And you did a good job with your writing in keeping all of his personalities separate enough where the reader could tell who was in charge. Ahh Goyjo that will teach you, keep your eye on the quiet ones!! Also Sanzo's character, man I laughed my ass off! Talk about getting your freak on he's just sooooo twisted, but that's why I love him. Shame on Sanzo, using his position as a monk to hit some on the side. You've done a great job, I can't wait to see what's next. Great job!

Mzblue: Squirms? Oooo I love squirms. :) Thank you for your kind words. I tried to make it clear which Hakkai was the active character. I’m glad you found it clear. Sometimes, they blended and merged…it was difficult for me to figure out who was talking to me at the time. Whew. I’m relieved this is coming through. Ahh yes poor Gojyo -- what did he unleash? Heh heh heh.

You have no idea how relieved I am that people are accepting this interpretation of Sanzo. I thought for sure I was gonna get flamed hard and get my ass handed to me. I am so relieved.

Yeah, Sanzo’s hitting it. But *how* is he hitting it? Hmmmm there’s a chapter coming that explores his sexuality ….heh heh heh. I’m not sure everyone is going to like it. I’m not sure it is what everyone is expecting. Hmm my fear of flameage is rising. If anyone can turn robes in to a “turn on” it would be our favorite blonde monk. Snicker.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Flamingolo 2004-08-19

This is freaking interesting! You wrote some fabulously steamy lemons *drools on 'self*. I loved the spin on Hakkai taking control...how hot can one scene be? I can't wait for more!

ps. Did I mention that the lemons were amazing?

Flamingolo: I’m glad you are enjoying my fic. I’m shocked that this started as a porn with very little plot. Apparently, (since you find it interesting) I was able to find and flush out a plot. *BIG GRIN*. I’m so very happy. Thank you so much.

Ahh yes, Hakkai as a dom. That’s they way I see their relationship all the time. I tried to sprinkle in hints of that dynamic through out the fic. He took the bottom role out of inexperience and let’s face it -- Gojyo isn’t the type to be tamed no matter how we cut it. Which is why they flip roles.
Hakkai’s the one that sits in the shadows and controls via gentle manipulation. The ones being manipulated aren’t aware of it until they are in the thick of it. They’ve accepted it before they even know what is going on. Sneaky little devil. He’s so good that he doesn’t realize he is doing it. We know he gets that from Tenpou.

I’m glad my lemons are liked. I ask “Is it hot?”. I’m glad you’ve answered. Thank you so much. Yes! The intended effect.
One of my beta-readers (PuffMonkey) called me with feedback on a previous chapter , “I had to stop reading halfway through it and call SpiderBoy (her fiancé’). I howled with laughter.
Yes! I making people get laid! It doesn’t get any better than this! Woo-hoo!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Shinigami 2004-08-20

What a great, fun read! In addition to excellent HakkaiXGojyo action *wiggles eyebrows lasciviously*, I adore your interpretation of Sanzo. Angsty Sanzo makes me sleepy. I would love to see a Sanzo-centric fic in that style. Mayhap a companion piece? A “meanwhile”? Anyway, I’ve really enjoyed these chapters. Keep ‘em coming (so to speak)!

Shinigami: I’m glad you are picking up on the fun aspect of this fic. I’m trying to take it seriously, but keep it light…can’t tell that from this chapter, huh? In an up and coming chapter I’ve got a bit where the Merciful Goddess interrupts the narrator. I sigh and wonder when exactly it was that I lost control of this thing.

Words cannot express my anxiousness over this interpretation of Sanzo. I also cannot properly express how much I appreciate my reviewers calming my fears.

A Sanzo fic with him in this state of mind? Ohhh that’s tough. My first reaction was to e-mail you and sorrowfully express that I am not the writer to do that fic. However, I have put some thought into it and I won’t make you any promises, but I will think on it.

I’m brewing a chapter that includes more Sanzo (for the Sanzo fans), but it keeps slipping into angst. I’m trying. I will think on your request.

I have two --no three unfinished fics along with this one. One is a Gojun “creative liberties” fic that is kinda turning into a Hakkai X Gojyo fic. I don’t think Hakuryuu gets nearly enough attention. A member of his clan is kidnapped. They run into the “rescue party” and ….. and well I suppose I should get it to a point where I can put up a chapter and gauge the reaction. If people like it I’ll finish it. I’ve got 30 some pages written on this one…what do you think? Post it and gauge reaction? Or wait until I’m confident it will be finished? It isn’t yaoi -- yet? Or will it ever be --- hmmm I’m not saying.

Another one is a darkfic…I was forced to lighten up under threats of forced therapy and abandoning beta-readers. I’m not joking. They were going to set up an intervention and suicide watch. *shakes head* Little did they know that writing that helped me feel better. I don’t like it nearly as much since I had to lighten it. I may never publish that one -- then again I might toss in a Hollywood ending, a gratuitous lemon and throw it up on the board. Then again…again… it might be too close to home to share. *shrug*
The third one explores the three years Hakkai and Gojyo shared a place. It is Gojyo centered (he pouted saying I didn’t pay him enough attention) and it has the roles kinda flipped with Gojyo being the one having a hard time about bi-sexuality. This chapter actually sparked that fic.
I don’t know when those will get finished. I’m focusing on this one right now, but I‘m nearing the end. I’ve made a commitment to the readers of this board. You’ve been kind enough to leave me your thoughts. I will hold up the end of my bargain.

Thank you for your praise and thoughtful suggestion.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Addictedtomarbles 2004-08-22

Oh I love this! It's damn sexy and makes my spine tingle when I read it. Update quickly! You're really good at this

^_^ Mmm... Kinky Tenpou

Addictedtomarbles: Thank you for your kind words. Tingles? Oooo tingles and squirms from earlier. I’m doing good! Woo-hoo! I love tingles! Thank you for your compliment.
I’m updating as quickly as quality control will allow. I see the typos sneak in there after I have posted and boy that burns me. Here’s my process. I write it. Edit it a few times. Read it aloud to myself a few times. Pass it to my beta-reader (sometimes readers) and then edit it a few more times myself, then finally I read it aloud to my beta-audience. There is a group that comes over to see my AMV’s and hear my fics. I’m loved *blush*….I haven’t figured out why. I‘m nothing special particularly when compared to the unbelievably good writers on this board. I go over it yet again and then post it. I go over it just after I post it and correct a few more things. I try to pace the postings no longer two weeks apart. Now, that classes are about to start up again there might be a delay. My main Saiyuki freak is taking grad classes…she’s gonna be busy. (She’s the one that makes sure I don’t kill canon.)
Kinky Tenpou -- you betcha! Kinky anyone is cool with me *big evil grin*. For the Tenpou X Kenren fans I’m brewing an addendum to this fic. Just a final, short, little, unrelated to the plot, chapter to flush out the incident Jiroshin eluded to…heh heh heh. Whaddya think about that? Good Idea? Bad Idea?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hakuryuu 2004-08-22

This was fantastic. There was a number of times where I absolutely laughed out loud (ie. their nicknames... the "Oh I think I'll jump off a cliff" for Hakkai XD!!!!!) but the whole thing was great. I love how Tenpou is always soooo... I dunno... bastardly? Hakkai can be pretty bitchy himself, sometimes... and that's hilarious. His more caustic side, when it comes out, is always fun to explore, ne? And poor, poor Kenren... I never thought of that ^^() little guy prolly got his butt kicked more than anyone on the battlefield! But I digress. I loved how you put more emotion into their words... it was a little unclear (I think intentionally, for part of it) when Hakkai went back to his room and then went missing... but that was easily remedied. Poor Dragon King guy... although he seemed to really kinda mellow out as Hakuryuu, ne? What else what else... oh the part where Goku believes he's asleep... priceless. I think you've done amazingly well with all of the characters and keeping them Canon... I'd just make sure that you remember that usually Sanzo is pretty darn serious, and he has more of an understanding relationship with Hakkai. He'd prolly be more willing to accept Hakkai than Hakkai thinks, even though he'd do it in his own, stoic way... and he definately wouldn't give Gojyo an inch. :) ANYWAY! Sheesh I get long-winded sometimes! Keep it up, I'd definately check out that Honeymoon fic (check it out with a box of kleenex, though. Trust me. You'll need it.) and I can't wait to read more!!!!!

Hakuryuu-- You always come through for me and believe me I appreciate it. Thank you for all your feedback. I really value your thoughts.
“Bitchy Hakkai” -- was this chapter bitchy enough for ya? Hmmm no? Welllll, then wait for it! Coming up next is a fracture of Hakkai not all that used…heh heh heh. The caustic side of Hakkai is indeed fun to explore, but it has to be set up right to be acceptable. There has to be the appropriate lead in -- I hope I have done that.
Kenren getting his butt kicked on the battlefield --- hmm. I have no doubts the guy took some licks, but I’m not sure if getting his butt kicked is the way to put it….oh I see now. I guess that all depends on how one defines “battlefield” and “licks” -- if the “battlefield” has any connection with Tenpou’s bedroom I’m totally with you. (I’m not even gonna explore “butt kicked” or “licks” take those as you wish. Giggle)
Gojun AKA Hakuryuu AKA Poor Dragon King Guy -- yes. My whole opinion on Hakuryuu changed when I learned of Gojun. I’m not sure if Hakuryuu is a reincarnated Gojun or a transformed Gojun, but either way if the others can be haunted by 500 years ago so can our little piece of transportation. I see Hakuryuu more alone the lines of a transformed Gojun. I see him as having a deeper connection to 500 years ago -- more memories -- or the same person just in dragon form. I also think his actions come across as cute because he’s a dragon, he’s little and he looks and sounds cute. In fan fiction, we can explore what is going on inside that dragon brain of his. I think he just appears cute, but is cut from a deep cloth of pride, honor, and duty. I think his inner dialog is more a long the lines of a Dragon King as opposed to some dragon Hakkai picked up at….ummm… don’t wanna spoil anything.
Anyways, Just to stress and to be redundant. His actions look cute and innocent, but inside there is something going on (IMHO). His perception of events just can’t come across like he wants them. I think there is a reason he clings to Hakkai. After all why Hakkai why not any of the others. Konzen was a GOD for pete’s sake…why Hakkai? I think it is Hakkai because Hakkai is Tenpou. Tenpou was Gojun’s superior. Gojun had a lot of respect for Hakkai (yes, I think that respect remained even during that “incident” --again I don’t want to spoil anything). Of course, there was a time that I suspected Hakuryuu was a Homura spy waiting to turn on our four heroes --- so I’m probably wrong about this too.
I’ve not had much exposure to Reload, but I have had a lot of exposure to Gaiden (including the bits that were in Zero Sum, but not published as a book yet). I try not to spoil anything. I try not to blatantly use anything that didn’t come out in the G. Saiyuki Anime or Manga (I’ve not read all the G. Saiyuki manga). Which is why Tenpou’s line earlier in the fanfic was so vague ---about punching (we all know who) and the “other time”. I didn’t want to give anything away, but those that have read the translations (even if they are not scans) will know what I’m talking about. If you haven’t read it then you will think I was being intentionally vague -- so it worked --- I hope.
I also tend to read way, way too deeply into some lines and some connections. See the aforementioned Hakuryuu as a spy thingy. These really come out in my fanfics. I’ve written entire sections based upon one line or one scene in a particular episode. Which is why you will see the character use a line that they used in the anime. “I didn’t know you had a playful side to ya , Monk” or even have a character say another character’s line.
Before you ask, I watch it both ways-- subbed and dubbed. I appreciate both of them. I enjoy both of them. English is my first language and I tend to listen to the EVA’s more. That’s as close as I’m getting to the dub / sub war… I’m not getting dragged into that. No way no how. There is room for all of us…I’m not going to insult anyone’s acting ability -- period. I respect all of them.
That --- and I have a close friend with Tourette’s Syndrome; he can’t read fast enough to enjoy it with the subtitles. I refuse to make him feel left out just to watch JVA’s.
Sanzo pretty darned serious and understanding Hakkai ----
Ok, noted. I’m sensing you think I pushed the envelope too far with Sanzo okey-dokey gotcha. This chapter winds up his little joke so we’ll see a more traditional Sanzo coming up -- not too traditional. I agree with you, I think Sanzo would understand Hakkai better than any of the others -- he just isn’t the type to admit it. He just can’t get himself to say it -- he’s been hurt too deeply too many times. I think Hakkai projects his self-rejection upon others. He’s rejected himself therefore others must reject him too. He carries way too much guilt to see the acceptance around him. As far as giving Gojyo an inch --- umm see my mind is way too perverted for me to even cum -- errr -- come close to touching that line. I can’t resist. He might not give Gojyo an inch, but he’ll give him eight. HAHAHAHAHA! Sorry…can’t help it.
The vague part --- I think I know the line you to which you refer. It was poor pronoun usage and I thought I had corrected it. I’ll do my best to correct that line when I post this.
Hakuryuu -- thank you for your thoughtfulness and all your insight. If I could I would reach through my screen and give ya a big hug. Alas that is impossible, will you settle for more chapters?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Xistential 2004-08-27
Update Oh please. I beg you!

Xistential - They day you wrote that review, was the day I was planning on posting this chapter. Is that good enough? :) I aim to please. No begging needed. Thank you for expressing your interest in seeing this fic continued.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To all reviewers,

I cannot express how important your words are to the writers of this board. Not only are we trying to see if our fics are liked or seeking out a gentle ego stroke, but we really are trying to determine if the fic should be continued. Your insight can help us improve. Better fics means better entertainment for all.
If you have read “Of Her Nature” you can tell how guarded I was while writing that -- compared to this one. I hadn’t even read a fanfic before the first installment of “Of Her Nature“. I felt I needed to justify the lemons. Then, I relaxed. Then, I paniced and cut the ending short because I felt interest had left.
Maybe I was too bold before, speaking on behalf of the other writers…maybe they don’t see it this way. One thing I do know is that there are some great fics on this board that weren’t finished due to random flamers (ya know that “canon watch” group that seems to pick a writer at random -- they get their kicks out of crewing up others) or lack of reviews. That’s just not good for any of us.
The flip side is of course that writers have an obligation to the readers -- to finish the work. I feel that if I have one person that likes it, I will finish it. I have an obligation. The reviews also help me get motivated to write when I’ve had a rough day at work.
I started writing to entertain myself, that has changed. I still do entertain myself and enjoy it, but entertaining you (the readers) has become the main goal. Do you like it? What do I need to work on? Is it worth finishing? You have answered my questions and I appreciate you hanging with me.
If you know me from the AFF groups board then you know there are other reasons why I write.
Thank you so much. I feel as if I am unworthy of such kind words and praise.
I hope the final chapters of this fic live up to your expectations.
Cupnjava c[~]~~~ *sip*
- 3
- 4
- 5
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Relax and Hang On -- Again