Nightmare Game

Nightmare Game


A D.Gray-Man Fanfiction


By SisterWicked


Chapter 4 - Fateful Night

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After drying himself off, Lavi decided that maybe he should hold off on questioning the mental state of his 'captor'. When he'd basically forced the man into the bath, Tyki had given him another of those surprisingly wide-eyed stares, but allowed himself to be pushed firmly in the direction of the tub. The Exorcist ignored the feeling of unease at the sight of the former Noah's scraped back, reminding himself that the man had bitten him.

When he'd joined the older man in the slightly too warm water, he'd found himself almost nose to nose with him, the man's arms holding the edges on either side of his body as he leaned close. His eyes had remained the strange deep grey that had alarmed the boy previously, and the oddly human coloring had caused him to wonder anew at exactly what his actions had wrought.

Seeing his anxiety, the older man had winced, turning quickly to inspect the wound he'd made on the smaller male's shoulder. Wordlessly, Lavi had inclined his head, allowing him to see that the bloodflow had stopped. Seeming satisfied, he'd pulled back, handing the boy a washcloth with a faint smile. Tending to his own skin, he'd almost ignored his companion, only speaking when he'd asked the other if he would mind handing him a particular bottle of shampoo.

Lavi glanced toward the room's far end, watching the older man with curious wonder as he tugged restlessly at the hem of yet another borrowed shirt, this one a deep purple that bordered on indigo. While he'd been right that the taller man's pants would be far too long, he'd been almost pleasantly surprised when Tyki rummaged through his armoire, muttering softly to himself before emerging with a pair of pants that resembled the one's he'd slept in before. Even though they were obviously sized for a taller person, they'd fit well enough to be comfortable, and the Exorcist had been forced to admit that the room felt much warmer with the soft material to cover him.

The older man had even seen to his feeding, leaving the room for only a moment before re-entering with a tray of various foodstuffs and a pitcher of what seemed to be cold tea. When Lavi had invited him to join his meal, he'd refused, saying that he didn't feel particularly hungry at the moment. Since then, he'd busied himself at the desk where he still sat, producing a pair of wire-framed reading glasses completely unlike the heavy ones that Lavi remembered him wearing. He sifted quietly through a stack of papers, the soft rustling noise breaking the silence of the room.

Lavi sat on the bed, growing steadily more impatient. Stretching his arms above his head, he sighed quietly. 'I may as well do something,' He thought, rising to his feet. 'It's not like he'll bite my head off or anything..' He crossed the room, trying to appear as casual as possible as he neared the man's seat. Leaning forward carefully, he laid his chin on the other's shoulder, humming curiously. Tyki inhaled sharply, casting a surprised look at the boy.

"I'm sorry, for a moment.." He shook his head, turning to face the confused Exorcist. "Is something wrong, Lovely?" He reached up, removing his glasses with one hand. Folding them carefully, he placed them in a narrow drawer, rubbing the bridge of his nose. Lavi waited for him to finish, sinking to his knees beside the chair.

"No, not really. I just wondered what you were doing. You've been sitting here for hours, aren't your eyes tired?" The older man frowned, reaching into a small opening in the desktop. Pulling out an ornately fashioned pocketwatch, he flipped open the lid with a hum of displeasure.

"My apologies, Lavi. I hadn't realized it was so long.. You're surprisingly patient, for someone who was ignored for almost an entire evening." He made to rise, waiting for the younger boy to move. "I fear you'll find my company somewhat lacking, Lovely. I've been here alone for quite some time, so the silence really doesn't bother me." He nodded at the scattered papers. "I tend to occupy myself with these to pass the time."

Lavi shook his head, raising a curious eyebrow. "Don't worry about it..What are they?" Tyki laughed quietly, stretching until his back popped with a slightly painful sound.

"An evil greater than any of my brethren." He laughed again at the Exorcist's surprised expression. "They're letters, Lavi. The Earl managed to amass quite a bit of money, through whatever means, but he never saw fit to account for his bills." His nose wrinkled distastefully. "Also, he did his best to intrude into the higher levels of society, hence letters requesting his, and now my presence at this function or that. I never attend, but it would be rude to ignore the invitation altogether. I respond with completely insincere regrets, usually close to the date of the event." Lavi snickered quietly at the man's obvious aversion.

"Not much of a party animal, eh? I wouldn't have guessed." Tyki frowned at his weak attempt to hide his laughter.

"I stopped considering myself as human quite some time ago, Lovely. I have no place at the homes of these deluded people. Most of them have availed themselves to the Earl's power at one time or another, and I'd rather not associate with them, in case they believe me capable of the same deeds." He shook his head, narrowing his eyes thoughtfully. "I honestly believe that a few of them may even think that my presence would give them an opportunity to present their marriageable children. It wouldn't be unheard of, since it's happened at least twice that I know of."

Lavi collapsed, clutching his stomach as he howled with laughter. "S..stop! Oh, that's just great! Twice? Wait, give me a minute..!" He wiped his eye briefly, waving his hand weakly at the man's frown. "I'm sorry, I just keep picturing you, looking at this..oh, God..girl with this horrible expression..!" He rocked gently, still holding himself as he laughed. "Do..do you even like women?"

The older man sighed, sinking to the floor beside him. "Lovely, I was the Noah of Pleasure. I liked everyone." For some reason, this response spurred the boy's glee to a new level, his eye closed tightly as he motioned for the man to stop. Tyki waited for his hilarity to subside, raising an eyebrow at him when he cleared his throat. "Are you finished? I was starting to wonder if you remembered to breathe, Lovely."

The boy nodded, taking a breath. "That just killed me. It must have been so awkward, trying to tell those people off without making anyone mad."

Tyki snorted, shaking his head. "You have no idea, Lavi. Sometimes I wonder if having wealth deteriorates the brain." He smiled, looking closely at the boy's amused face. "At least it wasn't a total loss. The rich have rather.. exotic ways of passing the time." He laughed quietly, rising to his feet and offering the other his hand. "Besides your enjoyment of my past suffering, was there anything you'd like to do, Lovely? The evening isn't quite finished, it's only about nine. Do you have any hobbies, things you like to occupy yourself with?"

Lavi took his hand, pulling himself up. "All I've really tried is reading, since learning things is pretty much why I'm in the Order in the first place.. They have a huge library." He frowned at the older man, curious. "Isn't there anything that you do? You can't just sit and do nothing, right?" The former Noah nodded.

"Sometimes I read, or other things. I do a lot of thinking, now." He raised an eyebrow at the boy's expression. "I told you, Lovely. I've been here for a while, and I don't exactly like the idea of talking to myself. There's not much to do, besides those things one can do alone."

Lavi nodded slowly. "Isn't it lonely? You left this morning, didn't you at least talk to anyone?" He frowned at the older man's negative. "Well, that's done. Pretty much anyone who knows me would tell you that I never shut up."

Tyki looked heavenward, smirking. "I don't think I need to give that a response, actually."

The Exorcist snorted quietly. "Right. If you're done being clever, we could maybe think of something to do that doesn't involve me talking or you brooding." He ignored the man's raised eyebrow, walking past him to sit on the bed again. "How about I be quiet, and you talk? You were going to tell me some things anyway, weren't you?"

He nodded, taking a seat beside the other male. "What would you like to know, Oh Brave Scholar? There really isn't a lot to tell, besides what you already know." Lavi's eye narrowed, his expression stubborn.

"Do you really need me to ask, Tyki? All right, then.. First, do you really want me to stay here? You aren't getting a lot out of it, why would you keep someone here that's only going to bother you?"

The man's face grew serious, his gaze direct. "I told you, didn't I? I and my other, we both want you here. It wanted to keep you long before you made your offer, Lovely." He leaned close, ignoring the boy's slight gasp at his sudden movement. "I want you here because you make me curious. Do you not want to stay, now?" He sighed at the redhead's wordless stare. "You should have taken more time to think of your position, Lavi.. I wouldn't have let myself harm you, had you refused me."

Lavi shook his head, alarmed at the quiet regret in the man's voice. "I didn't mean it like that! I said what I meant, Tyki. I didn't.. I told the truth, about everything. I know it's a stupid thing, but I still don't think you have to be like this. Whether you think so or not, you're pretty damn human to me." He bit his lip, looking away. "You wouldn't let the Order help you, I know that.. Will you let me try? Maybe there's something I can do, even if it's just to listen.."

The man blinked at him in surprise. "There's nothing to be done, Lovely. What you see is what I am, now." He moved to meet the boy's doubtful look. "The other parts of me, they aren't going to just leave, Lavi. Truthfully, I don't know if I want them to, they're all that's left of.." He shook his head, leaving the statement unfinished. "It doesn't matter. I won't let any of that stop me from doing as I please."

He leaned even closer, raising a hand to the Exorcist's shirtfront. Pulling him forward, he took advantage of the boy's momentary stillness, catching his mouth with his own. Feeling his shiver of anxiety, he kept his movements careful, urging the other to respond with a questioning noise against his lips. Lavi nodded faintly, allowing the man to deepen the kiss. His hands shook slightly, but rose to take hold of the older man's own at his collar.

Leaning back, he tugged on his grasping fingers, moving them away from their place. Still returning the man's cautious attentions, he threaded their hands together, ignoring the quiet sound that met his actions. Pulling back to breathe, he studied the other's face carefully, noting the almost hopeful confusion in his expression.

"I'm not finished with the question, but there's plenty of time for you to answer, isn't there?" He smirked at the man's wary nod. "Right. Other than that, was there something you wanted to know? You look like you've got something on your mind, Tyki."

The former Noah smiled, a slight tilt of the lips that made the boy hold his breath. "Actually, there is something.." He bent his head, invading the Exorcist's space. "Do you have another you in there? You're extremely pleasant when you're not screaming and kicking, Lovely." Lavi choked back a laugh, shaking his head.

"No, it's just me. I don't see any reason to act like that right now, since you wouldn't be kissing me if I were." Tyki's eyes widened at his statement, his fingers tightening minutely in the boy's grip.

"Lavi, you're talking yourself into trouble again." The redhead did laugh then, his tone teasing.

"Oh, that's nothing. I usually don't even need to say anything, trouble just follows me, I think." He leaned forward, lifting his face. "Maybe I should be nice and wait for it to catch up."

The older man accepted his silent offer eagerly, closing what little distance separated them with a possessive kiss. Avoiding the wound on the boy's shoulder, he moved his lips to the side of his throat, humming in agreement when the Exorcist hissed. "You won't have long to wait, Lovely.. But I don't think it's wise to continue this, you need time to heal." He smirked at the other's indignant huff. "Are you really so eager, Lavi? I'm sure there's something I can do to ease your impatience.."

Feeling the redhead's slight nod, he moved closer, pushing him down as he resumed his exploration of the skin against his lips. Tugging his hand free, he caught the boy's hip, stroking down his leg until he reached his knee. Pulling his head back, he nipped at the lobe of his ear. "Do you want it, Lovely? I won't take you, but there's something I'd love to do if you'll let me.."

Lavi shivered, his breath catching at the feeling of the man's hand moving up the inside of his thigh with deliberate slowness. "Please.." He closed his eye tightly, embarrassed at his own response to the other's touch. "You don't have to do anything," He mumbled, keeping his face averted. "I can wait until I'm not too..Tyki!" He gasped, arching up sharply as the older man cupped his palm over his suddenly urgent arousal. "Wait! It's not fair to you, is it? Don't you want to..!"

Tyki cut him off with a kiss, this one lacking the tentative quality of the first. "To Hell with 'fair', Lovely. The only thing I want right now is your permission." Lavi nodded shakily, unnerved by the flecks of gold in the man's angular eyes.

"If.. If that's what you want.. Are they bothering you, Tyki?" He bit his lip, steadying his voice. "It doesn't matter if they are, just.. Do what you want to do." Tyki shook his head, moving to rest between the boy's open legs.

"It isn't that, Lavi. Even if the other wanted you, I'd wait. What it wants doesn't matter anymore." He bent close, forcing the Exorcist to meet his gaze. "You're not theirs, Lovely. You're mine."

Lavi stared up at him in surprise, recognizing the now-familiar color of his eyes. All hints of the unnatural yellow were gone, leaving only the deep charcoal-grey that still confused him. "Yes," He whispered, at a loss for words. "Just yours. That's what I wanted."

Tyki nodded, sinking down to cover the boy's body with his own. "I never had any intention of sharing, Lavi. You told me not to let them force me, so when I took you before, that was only me. You didn't give yourself to us, you gave yourself to me." He pressed close, holding himself on one elbow. "They may try to encourage me, Lovely.. But the only one who's going to have you is me."

Lavi shuddered, lifting his knees to enclose the older man. Raising his hips invitingly, he wound his arms around the other's neck, tugging him down. "That's fine," He said, proud that his voice stayed firm. "Because that makes you mine, doesn't it?" Tyki allowed himself to be moved, sighing contentedly at the Exorcist's quiet murmur of appreciation.

"As you will, Lovely.. Though I believe that I'm getting the better end of the bargain." He caught the boy's mouth again, rocking his hips forward teasingly. Feeling his wordless moan against his lips, he slipped a hand under the redhead's body, pulling him up as he continued to move with tightly-controlled intensity. Lifting his head only as far as he needed to breathe, he nibbled at the boy's kiss-swollen lower lip, smiling darkly at the short whine that met his ears. "You should be careful, Lavi. There's something about that sound that makes me want to hear it again.."

Lavi shook his head faintly, struggling to put words to the jumble of his thoughts. "I can't help it," He managed, breathing hard. "You just feel.. and I want.. I don't know what's wrong with me." He laughed at himself, half in anxiety. "Maybe it's just delayed shock, or whatever. Don't worry about it, I still mean what I said."

Tyki frowned, lifting himself to catch the boy's eye. "Don't let me do this if it troubles you, Lovely. That would defeat the purpose of what you meant to do." He leaned back, intending to give the Exorcist more space, but the other's arms prevented his retreat.

"Don't! What I meant to do and what I want to do are the same thing.. I just don't know if I'm going to be able to make any difference." He relaxed his tight hold, but didn't remove his hands. "Do you really want to be here by yourself, Tyki? You could have left, if you wanted to. Why are you still here?" The older man blinked down at him in surprise, but halted his attempts to move away.

"Where else would I go, Lavi? This place is better than out there, where they may cause me to do something out of anger or boredom. As for being by myself, it's the same.. If something went wrong, I would most likely kill anyone that stayed too close." He regarded the boy's pained expression calmly. "I could bring you to grief, Lovely. Keeping you here was my folly long before you set yourself to remain."

Lavi frowned, twisting his fingers into the ends of the man's hair. Quelling his nervousness, he sighed. "You said you wouldn't. Everything else you told me was true, so I don't see any reason that that should be different." He took a breath, ignoring the catch in his voice. "Anything you've done was the same. I don't understand what happened, but haven't you had that thing urging you on? It wanted you to do this?"

The man laughed shortly, causing him to jump. "Not entirely, Lovely. I thought about making your comrades pay, but the other was only giving a suggestion. I decided to do this after only a bit of thinking. That's another part of my mistake, I chose to commit an atrocity against a total stranger in place of a group. Your presence was merely a coincidence, Lavi. If I hadn't seen you when I did, it may have been someone else. The decision to use your body was more mine than the other's."

Lavi shivered. "If it'd been somebody else, would you have.." He paused, forgoing the obvious question. "So, the idea was there, and the opportunity? That's why you did this, because you felt like being selfish? You aren't making much sense, Tyki. What I've seen of you isn't really like that! Even when we fought you, you never acted particularly evil! Why did you let them make you act like that? Your reasons aren't even all wrong! It's the method that's the problem!" He loosened his fingers, aware of his tightening grip. "Explain it to me! Why would you even want to do it? What good would it have done, you only hurt yourself!"

Tyki looked away quickly, his reply soft. "I wanted to have something," He murmured. "I thought that having you would allow me to regain something of what was lost. There was nothing more than that, it wasn't completely my idea. I saw you, and I took my chance. I'm not that good of a person, Lavi. There's nothing more to explain."

The redhead let out a shaky sigh. "You never told me what it was that you wanted back, Tyki. All you said to me was that you were going to take everything away, so that I'd know how it felt." He ignored the man's quickly indrawn breath, closing his eye. "Now that you have it, what else do you want? I can't undo what happened, even if I want to! I don't want to just leave it like that, not when you're.. Dammit, you're just the other side! The Akuma were the enemy of one side, and the Order was the enemy of the other! Of course you were all killing each other!"

He looked up, holding the alarmed man's stare. "It's over! Why would one person still have to fucking wallow in misery when everyone else is just leaving it behind? How the hell is that justice? It's disgusting that you can't get on with your life, because you don't have anything to get on with! Even after the bullshit ended, you've still got some asshole stopping you from being what you want to be! Did you choose the Noah, Tyki? The way I understand it, the damned thing just decided for you!"

He stopped, visibly collecting himself. "What I did for them was pointless, since they claimed that all they wanted was for people to have peace and happiness. If you can't be happy, then what about everyone else? The Order said it was for everyone!"

Tyki opened his mouth to speak, but found that nothing would come out. He swallowed, trying again. "Lovely, you can't take responsibility for everything.. I already told you that there's no getting back what I lost." Lavi shook his head angrily.

"You told me before that you wanted your life and your family again! I took part of that, didn't I? Maybe the rest isn't my fault, but that is! If I hadn't burned Rhode, Allen could have tried to save her, the same way he tried for you! Stop looking at me like that, you should have killed me when you were finished with me the first time! Keeping me here was just one more way for you to hurt yourself, and you didn't deserve it!"

He jerked his hands away from the man's back, clenching his fists hard enough for his nails to break the skin. "Even my being here is hurting you! You haven't hurt me at all, you didn't do anything but make me feel so fucking good that I crave it! Three times in two days, and right now I could just die to feel like that again! You're supposed to be using me, Tyki!" The older man's eyes widened in astonishment at his outburst.

"Lavi, stop this! You're not using me, and your presence doesn't bring me pain. I want you to be here, even if I don't know why! Ever since you let me touch you, I've tried to reason it out, but it doesn't make sense! All I know is that I want to have you here. You said that I'm yours, Lovely? That's enough! That's what I want from you, so just let it be!"

The boy's eye widened in disbelief, his face pale enough for concern. "I..But..You can't!"

The older man laughed abruptly, cutting off is protests. "I can do anything I like, Lovely. You want to give me something to make up for my loss? Start with that, and we'll see if it 'makes me better', hm?" He leaned back in, stopping only an inch from the boy's parted lips, giving him a clear view of his rapidly changing eyes. "My family loved me, Lavi. Can you do that? That's what I lost, when I lost them. You can give me that, if you're so worried about 'paying me back'."

Lavi gasped, pushing back against the mattress. "I'm sorry! I don't.. I can't..!" His chest constricted in anxiety, choking off his breath. "I don't know how! I'm not supposed to have any heart, Tyki! I can't give you something that I don't even have..!" He closed his eye, forcing down his panic. "Please don't ask me for something that isn't there. I've already given you all that there is, why did you let me, if it wasn't going to be enough?"

Tyki bent even closer, speaking against the shaking Exorcist's mouth. "I let you because I wanted it, Lovely. You told me that I should do what I wanted, so I took what you were willing to give. Right now, I can honestly say that I'd love to have you, because you feel so much better when you're willing.." He pressed himself into the other's embrace, sighing in satisfaction when he felt the boy shudder in response. "I won't do that, though. I told you that you need to heal, but that doesn't mean that I can't do other things, in the meantime."

He licked teasingly at the Exorcist's lip, smiling at his soft whine. "I think you want me to do something for you, Lovely. Even if you say it isn't fair, you still want it.. You just admitted that, so why would I deny you the thing you 'crave'?" He lowered a hand to the boy's waistband, tugging firmly on the loose material. "Before you let your conscience get the better of you, you were acting like you wanted me.. Will you let me have you, Lavi?"

The younger boy shivered, nodding his head. "Anything you want, Tyki.. Just.. don't forget to keep them out of it. The only one I want is you." He lifted his hips, allowing the man to pull down his borrowed pants. His voice was still tremulous, but he ignored the waver in it to continue. "I won't try to fight you, but please don't be.."

Tyki dropped the pants carelessly by the bed, waving his hand at the lights. They dimmed accordingly, the harsh brightness lessening into almost total darkness. Moving back into the space he'd left, he bent close enough to be heard over the boy's rapid breathing. "Don't be afraid, Lovely.. I told you I wouldn't share you with anyone, didn't I?" He stroked the Exorcist's face, catching his chin to turn him. "Look at me, Lavi. It's only me, can you really not see it?"

The redhead met his serious gaze, his eye adjusting to the dimmed light as he blinked. He expected to see yellow, from the intensity in the man's voice, but there was only grey. "I'm sorry," He whispered, relaxing slightly. "I thought I made you too mad.." Tyki shook his head, his expression softening.

"I'm not angry with you, Lovely. Even if I were, I wouldn't have done anything to hurt you." He leaned in briefly, pressing his lips to the side of the boy's mouth. "Stop worrying about things that no one can change. You can't change what you are, anymore than I can change what I am. Just remember one thing, none of the rest is important." He moved his hands, holding the other's face carefully. "Don't ever say that to me unless you mean it. That's the one lie that you never need to tell, no matter how much you think it would 'help'."

Lavi nodded quietly, storing away that information for later musing. "I promise."

Tyki hummed in agreement. "Good. It's not worth any further discussion, so.." He pushed up the boy's shirt, leaving his arms covered by the loose sleeves. Smiling at his confused expression, the older man bent his head slightly, licking the skin of his chest. "Mm. Perhaps I was mistaken, earlier.." He repeated the action, taking note of the Exorcist's shaky whimper. "Suddenly, I find myself absolutely famished."

Lavi tugged at his arms, fumbling with the awkward material that covered his hands. Pulling free, he caught the man's shoulders loosely, holding on without hampering his movements. He panted wordlessly at the other's skillful teasing of his nipple, his fingers tightening when the man's teeth pressed gently on the hardened skin. Tyki laughed quietly, stroking the boy's side with his fingers.

"Well, you aren't talking, and I'm not brooding, Lovely.. I suppose this fits your suggestion rather well." He slid back, following the line of a rib with his mouth. "This is by far more interesting than polite correspondence, you should have spoken sooner." He held the redhead's lifted hips, dipping briefly into his navel. Feeling his legs tremble in response, he smiled against his skin. "Don't be so anxious, Lavi.. I promise not to bite you, not very hard, anyway."

Lavi gasped sharply, the sound catching with surprise as he felt the older man's breath on his skin. Arching up, he moaned brokenly at the sensation of the other's mouth on his inner thigh, leaving a trail of warm wetness behind it as he tightened his grip on the boy's hips. Holding him steady, he dragged his tongue over the tip of his erection, relishing the Exorcist's startled cry at the feeling.

Keeping his hands firm, he repeated the motion, moving back to reach more of his sensitive skin. Lavi released his shoulders, fisting his hands in the fabric beneath him as the older man opened his mouth, sucking on his aching flesh. "Tyki! Oh, God..!" He bit his lip, closing his eye tightly in embarrassment. The former Noah hummed in amusement, the vibration sending a jolt of increased arousal up the boy's spine.

He kept his movements steady, holding the redhead's body still as he continued to tease him with gentle licks and the occasional press of teeth, both of which drew slightly wavering moans from the boy's mouth. Thoroughly enjoying his responsiveness, the older man sighed in satisfaction, strangely pleased at the other's obvious desire for his touch.

After several panting breaths, Lavi whimpered pleadingly, the man's torturous pace driving his urgency to desperate levels. Sensing his eagerness, Tyki intensified his efforts, ignoring the desire to simply take the shuddering boy. He pulled back, licking slowly up the Exorcist's tense thigh with a low murmur of appreciation. "Good, Lovely? It seems like you're enjoying yourself.." Lavi nodded rapidly, nonsensical sounds of agreement drawing a smile from the older man. "Would you like me to finish you, Lavi? You didn't want me to, before.."

The redhead moaned plaintively, lifting his hips as much as the other's hold would allow. "Please! I don't want you to stop, this is different than...God! I want it, Tyki, please let me..!"

The man sighed contentedly, nodding his head. Resuming his ministrations, he lapped at the boy's length in earnest, drawing him in as deeply as he could manage as he traced teasing designs on the heated skin. Lavi's cries reached a feverish pitch, his legs shaking as he struggled to follow the motions of the other's mouth. Tyki moaned at his pleas, feeling his own arousal spike sharply along with the boy's rising need. He noted the redhead's shaking muscles, urging him on with a questioning hum that drew a strangled exclamation from the other male.

"Yes! Tyki!"

His back arched almost painfully, his body wracked with nearly convulsive shudders as he came, the older man's hands clenching on his skin as he took everything the boy had to offer. Feeling his shivers, he swallowed quickly, wiping his mouth carelessly on his sleeve. He leaned back, relaxing his tight grip in favor of stroking the sweat-dampened skin. "Is that better, Lovely? I must say, you certainly are delicious.. Would you let me do it again sometime?"

Lavi blinked at him in confused wonder. "Are you serious? What idiot say no to that? It's not as good as.. other things, but.." He flushed hotly at the man's raised eyebrow, averting his face with a quiet growl. "Don't look at me like that, I know you think I'm stupid." His voice lowered, making the older man strain to make out his words. "Do whatever you want, Tyki. I already told you I won't fight, so just leave it at that."

He reached for his discarded shirt, ignoring the other's silent stare. "I'd return the favor, but I'm probably too dumb to get it right." Donning the shirt, he leaned to retrieve the rest of his clothing, suddenly desperate to put distance between himself and the still-silent man. Tugging them on, he rose, speaking without looking back. "I'm going to sleep. Enjoy the rest of your evening, Tyki."

He made it almost to the door before a firm hand on his elbow brought him to a halt. Stiffening in alarm, he waited for the man to speak, resisting the urge to pull away. Tyki leaned close, his breath tickling the boy's ear.

"I never said you were stupid, Lovely. I merely wondered if you enjoyed having me do that, since the first time upset you so badly.. I won't do it again, if it made you think of that." Lavi shivered, shaking his head.

"I let you, didn't I? It only bothered me then because you used it to prove a point. This was different, wasn't it?" He turned slightly, smirking. "It didn't remind me of that, I was too busy thinking about how good it felt to remember much of anything. Didn't it bother you, to do it without getting anything for yourself?"

Tyki pulled him around, looking down at him seriously. "How do you know I didn't, Lovely? It's rather satisfying to hear you scream my name when you come, perhaps that's all I needed. You're surprisingly vocal, Lavi."

Lavi flushed in embarrassment, glaring at the man's quiet laugh. "It isn't that funny. If I'm too noisy for you, you could always use a gag. If you're done making fun of me, could I please go to bed? Unless there is something you need, besides hearing me yell?"

Tyki smiled, making the younger boy's breath catch. "I'm not making fun of you, Lovely. But I certainly wouldn't refuse such a polite offer.." He bent his head, nuzzling against the Exorcist's neck. Wrapping an arm around his waist, he tugged him forward with a laugh. "I don't want anything from you, Lavi. You're more than welcome to do whatever pleases you, however."

Lavi shivered, tentatively catching the material of the older man's shirt. Turning his face, he winced slightly at the ache of his still-tender throat. "I..I don't know what to.." He trailed off, biting his lip in embarrassment. "Do you want me to do that for you? I wouldn't mind trying it, if.." Tyki hummed thoughtfully, his reply muffled by the other's skin.

"Only if you wish to, Lovely.. I'm certainly not adverse to having your hands or your mouth on me." He nibbled playfully at the boy's pulsepoint, smiling when he gasped. "Are you frightened, Lavi? I truly am sorry that I bit you, but you did say that you liked it.."

The Exorcist shook his head, wincing again. "I told you, I don't care about that. Hell, maybe a little blood was enough to calm down your.. Friend upstairs." He leaned back, meeting the older man's amused stare. "I really don't know what's wrong with me.. Even after..that, I still.." He sighed, closing his eye. "Maybe it's just wanting more of something good, in place of stuff that wasn't. Not having to be completely alert and wound up makes it different, I guess."

Tyki blinked at him, raising an eyebrow. "Different, Lovely? The only difference is in you, your willingness changes everything." He caught the boy's face in his hands, tilting his head back. "You hated to have me kiss you, didn't you? Does it still disgust you, Lavi?" Bending his head, he caught the redhead's mouth, noting his almost-instant response. Stroking his tongue over the other boy's lip, he coaxed him to deepen the contact with a teasing retreat into his own mouth. Lavi accepted his offer, following his movements with a soft whine.

Undeterred by the faint taste of himself, he pressed closer, allowing the older man to lead him back into the room. Tyki lifted his head, slightly out of breath.

"Is that different, Lovely? It doesn't seem to concern you now, but before you tried to bite me.." He laughed quietly at the boy's sorrowful expression, still guiding him steadily back toward the bed. "It was understandable, at the time. You also told me that you hated the way I felt, even though you physically enjoyed it.. I know it still feels good to you, but do you detest it so much?"

Lavi shook his head faintly, his hands loosening on the man's shirt. "I told you I don't.. But I can't make sense of wanting you like this." He frowned at the rising heat in his cheeks. "Even if it's different, I shouldn't be like that, should I? I don't have anything to compare it to, to say that it's 'better' than something else.." He trailed off, looking away in discomfort. "It doesn't even matter that it would hurt to do that, I still.. I'd let you, if you wanted it. That's why I think there's something wrong with me, because I shouldn't be hoping that you do."

He laughed, the sound slightly strained. "I really do want to do something for you, Tyki. That's another thing that doesn't make any sense, why do I feel like I need to, when I don't even know how?" The older man led him to the bedside, urging him down with a careful push.

"I don't think I could explain it to you, Lavi.. Wanting to please someone else, I can understand that myself, but having a need to is frankly beyond me." He sat beside the confused Exorcist, moving back to rest against the headboard. "Come here, Lovely. Perhaps being closer will help you think, if it truly alarms you." He patted the space next to himself, raising an eyebrow questioningly at the other's hesitance. "I won't touch you, Lavi.. I never intended to ask you for anything, there's no reason for you to worry."

Lavi shook his head, sliding nearer. "It isn't that, Tyki. What worries me about being close is the fact that I want you to touch me. You said you didn't want that, so I don't want to push you."

The former Noah laughed softly. "You aren't pushing me at all, Lovely. Hearing you say that is far more tempting that anything you could possibly do." He waited patiently as the boy settled himself beside him, sighing in contentment at the other's weight against his shoulder. "It could be interesting to test the depth of your sudden obsession, when you're well enough to do so."

Lavi winced, averting his face. "I shouldn't have said anything at all. I'm glad you think it's funny though."

Tyki shook his head, leaning around to catch his eye. "I'm not laughing at you, Lavi. I can assure you, if you continue to feel that way, I'll certainly be more than happy to give you what you want." The man's deliberate statement brought a rush of images to the younger boy's attention, causing his breath to hitch in embarrassed arousal.

"Stop," He said, closing his eye tightly. "Don't say things like that, not when.. I should stay away from you, Tyki. Being here isn't helping at all, it's only making it worse." He started to slide away, but the older man quickly took hold of his wrist.

"Is it truly that bad, Lovely? Look at me." He turned the boy's face carefully, taking in his wide eye and flushed cheeks. "Goodness, you are in a state, aren't you?" He bent close, catching the redhead's mouth with his own. Feeling his instant acceptance, he deepened the kiss, pulling the other fully around and against him. Lifting his head, he moved to the Exorcist's throat, murmuring against his pounding pulse. "Do you think I would leave you this way, Lavi? You should have known that I wouldn't.."

The younger boy shivered, gripping his arms tightly. "I didn't.. I.. Oh, God.." He trailed off, his hands rising to tangle into the older man's hair. "Please don't..!" The former Noah laughed softly, following the line of his jaw before pulling away.

"Don't what, Lovely? I doubt that even you know what you mean.." He stroked the Exorcist's back with his fingers, noting his shaking muscles with amusement. "Hm.. When you let go, you really let go, don't you, Lavi? I wonder if I should be flattered.." His hands wandered lower, tickling the sides of the redhead's waist. "Perhaps you still need something? I certainly wouldn't mind helping you see what it could be, unless you'd rather tend to the problem yourself..?"

Lavi stammered out a negative, leaning as far from the man as his hold allowed. "No! You.. I'm not..!" Tyki followed, still mildly amused at the boy's sudden near-panic.

"But you are, Lavi.. Shouldn't you make use of someone you call 'yours' to alleviate your discomfort?" He loosened his grip, easing the redhead backward. "I can almost smell the need from you, did you know that? It's thick enough to cut with a knife, Lovely." The Exorcist gasped, his face rivaling the color of his hair.

"I don't mean too! Something's wrong!" He closed his eye, struggling visibly to collect himself. "It hurts..! Just hearing you talk like that makes it worse! I can't be here, Tyki, it's not right!" The older man slid his arm from beneath him, raising an eyebrow as he jerked away from the touch.

"You've changed your mind, Lavi? That is unfortunate, being that I truly wish to keep you exactly where you are.." He pushed the boy's knees apart with his own, leaning down to meet his gaze. "You're not fighting, do you honestly regret your choice?"

Lavi shook his head, wincing at his tone. "That isn't what I meant! I meant now, like this!" He bit his lip at the feeling of the man's breath on his skin, turning away. "I need to get away from you, it's driving me crazy!" Tyki smiled, licking the now-exposed skin of his throat.

"What if I don't want you to go? Will you keep your promise, Lovely?" He stroked the boy's side, catching his hip as he arched. "With you so obviously unsatisfied, how could I spurn you? My only concern was for your comfort, but I could overlook that if you truly wished it, Lavi."

Lavi shuddered at his words, half-choking on his reply. "Please don't let me use you!" He pressed back against the blanket, keeping the man at a distance. "Even if you want to, that's what it is! Don't!"

Tyki shook his head, his smile slightly wicked. "That isn't what it is, Lavi. Do you have any idea what I think about it?" He bent close, watching the boy's eye widen. "I'll tell you exactly what I'm thinking. I'm thinking that I wish you healed as quickly as I do, so that I could still be taking you. If I weren't so loathe to hurt you, I would never have stopped in the first place, Lovely."

Taking advantage of his surprised gasp, Tyki kissed him, his hand tightening on the Exorcist's lifted hip as he rocked against him firmly. "I haven't stopped wanting you since I brought you through the door, Lavi. Even before you allowed me, I thought to convince you again." The redhead whimpered brokenly, reminded of the man's attempts at coercion.

"I don't think you would have had to, if you'd stayed.." He looked away, mortified at his confession. "When I woke up, I..I wanted..I would have let you, if you'd been here. I wouldn't have said it, but I would have let you do it." He sighed quietly, the breath catching midway as the older man continued to move.

Tyki hummed appreciatively, lifting his body higher. "So it wasn't only to 'save me', Lavi? That just makes this better.. I'd rather have had you decide than to have won your consent through pity" Sliding his hand lower, he pushed at the waist of his pants, stroking the skin beneath them with gentle circular movements. "You still want that, don't you? Even if you say that it's wrong, you want me to touch you regardless.. You really should be honest, I would have done what you wished of me, Lovely."

He smiled at the boy's halting nod, satisfied with his soft affirmative. Slowing his insistent motions, he rested his weight on his elbows, catching the other's face in his hand. "What is it that you need, Lavi? Is it more than what I'm doing, or more than what I did? All you have to do is ask.."

Lavi shivered, closing his eye with a moan. "I want you," He mumbled, arching into his touch. "It still isn't enough, please.." Biting his lip, he lifted his arms to the man's shoulders, tugging him down. "I'm sorry, I just.." Tyki laughed softly, shaking his head.

"Don't be sorry, Lovely. I told you what I wanted, didn't I?" He leaned in, pressing their mouths together. Growling quietly at the boy's eager response, he slid a hand beneath his head, holding him in place as he deepened the kiss. His opposite hand inched down the Exorcist's side, pushing up his borrowed shirt to touch the skin below it.

"My only regret is that it may be more than just discomfort, Lavi.. You may dislike me very much, come morning." The Exorcist shook his head, lifting his back to give the older man room to remove his shirt.

"I won't. You're only doing what I want you to do, Tyki." He shifted, gasping at the other's answering movement. "Feeling like this is worse, I feel like I swallowed glass, like something's cutting me up on the inside.. But it isn't because of you, you didn't do this." Shugging off the shirt's loose sleeves, he pulled hesitantly at the older man's clothing. "Take it off? I..I want to feel you on me.."

Tyki nodded, rising to his knees. "By all means, Lovely. Do it yourself, if you wish."

Lavi pushed up to sit, reaching for the buttons with shaking fingers. "I wish I wasn't like this. I don't want to make you do this, it still feels like I'm using you.." He unfastened the last button, waiting for the man to remove it. "Can I.. I mean, is it all right if..?" He winced, clearing his throat in embarrassment. "Is it okay for me to touch you?"

The older man blinked in surprise. "Why are you even asking, Lavi? You can do anything you like, I told you." He leaned forward, meeting the redhead's cautious fingers. "Don't be afraid of doing something wrong, Lovely. I doubt that anything you do will be less than pleasant." Lavi nodded, lying his palms flat against the man's chest. Feeling the warmth of his skin beneath his hands, he moved lower, carefully tracing his ribs and stomach. Hearing his breath catch, he glanced up in alarm.

"I'm sorry, I didn't.. Tyki..?" He frowned in confusion, watching the older man's face closely. "Is it wrong? I don't know what to do, I thought.. It felt good when you did it to me, so.."

The former Noah shook his head, letting out the breath he'd been holding. "It's fine, Lavi. Better than fine, actually." He smiled at the boy's troubled expression. "Was there anything else? You're extremely anxious, for someone who wants this enough to be shaking." He raised an eyebrow curiously. "Why are you so afraid, Lovely? Do you think that I might harm you?"

Lavi shook his head, moving closer. "I know you won't, but.. I want to do this right, I just don't know if I can." He leaned in, using his hold to pull the older man forward. Taking a quick breath, he pressed his lips to the skin above his breastbone, moving his hands around to his back. Feeling his muscles tense, he opened his mouth, licking hesitantly over the place he'd kissed. Tyki murmured approvingly, urging him on with a hand against his head.

"It feels good, Lavi.. Again?" The younger boy nodded, repeating his movements across the width of the man's chest, his hands stroking the smooth skin of his back. Flushing slightly, he tightened his hold, drawing his tongue carefully across the other's nipple. Tyki moaned, pushing into the contact. "Gods, Lovely.. You probably shouldn't do that, I might have to cut short your wandering."

Lavi shook his head faintly, lapping at the hardened skin. Ignoring his growl, he sucked gently, still clutching firmly at his back. Feeling the man's quick shudder, he leaned away, looking up to catch his gaze. "Do what you have to, Tyki."

The older man nodded abruptly, pushing him back against the blankets. "You won't be needing these.." He said, tugging the boy's pants to his knees. Lavi kicked them off, reaching for him eagerly.

"You, too." He said, fumbling with the other's button and zipper. "Get rid of the damn things, please?" Tyki laughed, helping him with the fastening before sliding the garments off.

"'Damn things' indeed. They would be a hindrance, however.." He nudged the boy's knees impatiently. "Spread your legs, Lovely. I want to touch you." He moved into the space provided, taking hold of the redhead's hips. "Tell me if anything I do is painful, Lavi.. I can always find something better."

He lifted the boy's body higher, leaning in to press kisses to the skin of his arched throat. Feeling his anxious shiver, he murmured quiet reassurances, wordlessly reaching for the jar of ointment on the table. Working open the lid, he covered his fingers thoroughly, setting the remainder nearby. "Relax a bit, Lovely.. I don't want this to hurt you."

He lowered his hand between them, lifting himself for room. Finding the place he sought, he pressed his finger inward, wincing at the boy's persistent tightness. Ignoring the urge to hurry, he kept his movements gentle, alert for any sign of pain in the Exorcist's widened eye. "Is it uncomfortable, Lavi? You're shaking so hard.."

Lavi shook his head, lifting his hips with a quiet moan. "It isn't bad, I promise.. Please don't be afraid, I want you!" Surprised at his reaction, the older man continued his careful touches, slowly adding a second finger.

Feeling the boy's shaking increase, he pressed firmly against the small ridge inside of him, smiling at his pleading cries. "I believe I am flattered, Lovely.. Either I'm exceptionally good, or I've made you insatiable."

Lavi nodded, gasping for breath as he moved urgently against the man's hand. "You are! Please!"

Tyki laughed quietly, withdrawing his fingers. "You really are going to hate me, Lavi.. But I suppose if it's inevitable, I should at least make it worth your ire." He coated himself liberally, closing the container and dropping it to the floor. Gesturing vaguely at the lights, he plunged the room into darkness, following the Exorcist's shaky breaths to touch him.

Leaning over his body, he caught his raised hips in his hand, bending close to speak. "Is this how you want it, Lovely? I hadn't though to ask.." Lavi arched against him, taking hold of his shoulders.

"Anything, Tyki.. It doesn't matter how, I need you!"

The older man hummed softly, rising to his knees. Pulling the Exorcist to him, he turned them carefully around, aware that the other lacked the night vision he still possessed. Leaning against the headboard, he drew the boy up to straddle him, keeping a firm hold on his waist. "This may be better, Lavi.. You can stop anytime, if it hurts you."

Lavi nodded eagerly, pressing close enough to feel the other's heartbeat through his chest. "I will if I need to, I promise." He wrapped his arms tightly around the man's shoulders, licking at the side of his throat. "I don't think I'll have to, this felt so damned good.."

Tyki urged him backwards, lifting his hips to meet him. "Relax yourself, Lovely.. You shouldn't still be so..Oh, Gods.." He moaned at the boy's eagerness, allowing him to move as he wished. Feeling his wordless shudder, he tightened his arms around him, holding him in place as he rocked upward slowly. "Don't be so hurried, Lavi.. Take your time and enjoy it." Lavi whimpered pleadingly, pushing back against him.

"Please let me move, I want it..!" He arched, using his grip for leverage. "God, you feel so good! Tyki, please just let me have you, it doesn't hurt at all!" The older man gasped, releasing the hold on his waist.

"Do as you wish, Lovely.." He stroked the skin of his back, catching his mouth insistently. Sucking at his barely-healed lip, he moaned. "Is this what you needed to feel? You don't seem afraid anymore.." Lavi nodded, renewing the kiss on his own. Pulling back for air, he leaned in, nipping at the man's skin.

"I'm sorry you wanted it slower," He whispered, soothing the sting with his tongue. "We can do it that way next time.." Kissing along his shoulder, he smiled at the older man's startled groan. "Right now, I just need to have you.. Please, let me make you come?"

Tyki laughed shakily, his hands closing tightly on the boy's tense shoulders. "I don't think that's an issue, Lovely." Lifting his hips, he met the other's increasingly faltering rhythm, gasping at the sensation of teeth against his skin. "Lavi!"

The Exorcist whined in acknowledgement, pressing close as he shuddered. "Please! I know you want it.. Tyki, please come with me! It's too much, I..Oh, God! Now!" He arched, locking his arms around the other's shoulders as he came, whimpering at the man's broken cry of completion. Panting harshly from exertion, he shivered with spent nerves as the feeling of impending madness receded, leaving him shaken with relief.

He leaned back slightly, laughing with jittery anxiety. "Did.. I didn't hurt you, did I? Tyki?"

The older man shook his head, pulling the boy back down gently. "Just..Stay there, Lovely. Give me a moment.." Lavi nodded, loosening his arms fractionally as he sighed. The sound of the man's rapid heartbeat was lulling, urging him to relax into his hold. Tyki shifted, allowing him to settle more comfortably against his chest. "Is that better, Lavi? I wasn't expecting you to be so eager, you truly are surprising.."

The Exorcist hummed an affirmative, leaning back slightly. "I'm sorry it was like that.. But thank you, for letting me do it." The former Noah laughed softly, helping him rise to his knees.

"Don't apologize, Lovely. There's still a chance that you'll want to take it back, in the morning.." Lavi huffed quietly, shaking his head.

"I don't think I will, Tyki. I told you, it didn't hurt me, so let's just wait and see."

Moving back with a hiss, he groped blindly for his discarded clothing. Locating the shirt, he slipped it on, feeling his way to the bathroom. Blinking at the sudden brightness, he soaked a cloth in water, wiping himself clean with a shiver. Glancing up at the mirror, he jumped at the figure behind him, startled by the man's silent approach. "God, you scared the hell out of me! Try to make a little noise, huh?"

Tyki laughed, taking the washcloth he offered. "I should think you'd be used to it, Lavi. I didn't mean to frighten you, my apologies." He cleaned himself quickly, rinsing the cloth thoroughly before tossing it into the hamper. "Let me see you, Lovely. I still can't believe that I bit you.."

He inspected the boy's shoulder closely, frowning at the depth of the wound. "We should put something on it, it looks like it may scar." He sighed, opening a drawer by the sink. Digging briefly through it, he produced a small jar with no label. "Let me?"

Lavi nodded slightly, inclining his head to accept his careful touch. "It really doesn't matter, Tyki. I told you, I've had tons of cuts and scrapes, and most of them were worse." He winced at the medicine's strong smell, ignoring the tingling sensation it left on his broken skin. "Do you want to sleep now? I can leave you alone, if..!"

Tyki cut him off swiftly, catching his mouth with his own. Keeping the contact gentle, he pulled away after only a moment. "Stay, Lavi? I want you here, will you?" The redhead blinked in astonishment, surprised by the earnestness of his question.

"I.. If you want me to, but.. Why? Doesn't it bother you, to have somebody there? You're used to sleeping alone, aren't you?" The older man shook his head, leading the boy back to the bedroom by a hand.

"It doesn't disturb me, Lovely. As for why.. I simply want you here." He paused, looking back over his shoulder. "Do you not wish to? I wouldn't force you, if it troubles you.."

Lavi shook his head quickly, stepping forward. "No! I didn't meant that it would, I just thought you'd want time to yourself, you've been stuck here with me all day.." He turned his hand, tightening his grip around the other's fingers. "It's fine, Tyki. I don't mind staying if you want me to."

He walked toward the bed, stepping over their hastily-strewn clothing. "What a mess.. Stop laughing, some of these are yours!" The older man nodded, still smiling faintly as he extinguished the lights.

"Indeed they are, Lavi. Besides the obvious, would you care to join me?" He reached for the boy's hand, pulling him firmly into the bed with a laugh. Waiting for him to find a comfortable position, he settled close against him, sighing tiredly into his hair. "See, Lovely? This isn't so unpleasant after all.. I don't know why you would think I'd be bothered.." A quiet murmur was the only reply, something that sounded vaguely like an agreement reaching his ears as the Exorcist dozed.

For several long minutes, Tyki lay in the darkness, wondering if he had truly made a mistake. The other boy's gentle breathing made him question the reason for his actions, even more than his impassioned words from before. Pushing away his unease at the redhead's sudden desperation, he decided to sleep on the matter. As he allowed sleep to claim him, he wondered why the boy's presence was so calming, in light of the things he'd done. His dreams were full of the questions, even as thousands of glowing fireflies were darkened one by one, their light taken away by a figure that laughed in the darkness..

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Well, there's THAT bit. Hopefully, anyone who asked for this-or-that is satisfied.. As always, review or something, because I don't want to continue this if no one wants it!


This can also be called an early Birthday present for my Site-mate and Co-author Niamh, who's getting a lil bit older in just three days! Happy Birthday from your wicked sibling, Nee-san! Please be nice and wish her many more great years, huh? To everyone else, Thanks for reading! Ja!