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Suppressed	By : nekked Category: +M to R > One Piece Views: 8384 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 0
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Chapter List
- 7
- 8
- 9
Suppressed

Ch. 8: Bureikingu Pointo

It had rained over the archipelago the night before, so Shakky thought it might be a good idea to get up early, have a cup of coffee and read the newspaper outside while it was still cool.

She set the two prepared breakfast plates on a couple of dish towels for when the guests woke up, and grabbed the paper.

Not even ten minutes into this decision, who should climb up that last hill and come sweeping over to place a chaste kiss on her forehead but Silvers Rayleigh. How she always managed to know when he might show up, she wasn't really sure, but it was nice to see old age wasn't dulling her woman's intuition. She smiled up at him and placed her hand over the one he had on her shoulder.

"I've got a surprise for you," she said, raising her eyebrows and not even bothering to comment on how long he'd been gone this time. He smirked.

"Oh really now?"

"Mm-hm. I should tell you a bit about them before they wake up and you make a fool out of yourself."

"They?" Rayleigh said tentatively, looking confusedly at the door to the bar and back to his wife. "Someone's here?"

"A young man and woman."

"Well, I'm not old enough yet that I can't differentiate gender upon first sight…"

Shakky looked doubtfully at his tattered clothes and scraggly gray beard, shrugging and chewing on the end of her cigarette.

"They came here looking for you," she said softly. "They need you to take them to where Monkey-chan is."

Rayleigh looked startled, then gave her a look like she should elaborate before he told her what he thought about that.

"I already went through an interrogation of sorts," Shakky said, turning the page of the paper. "I think, since we already know where he is, this is one thing we should make an exception for."

"I'm having a hard time thinking of any reason to share that kind of information with complete strangers, Shakky dear," Rayleigh said, a bit of distress showing in his raspy voice. He rubbed at his neck and sighed. "Government spies are-"

"If they are government spies, they won't be talking," Shakky said quietly, looking up at him. "At least she won't. She's mute."

"...Mute?"

"Yes. She's traveling with her brother who translates for her."

"…I see. Then…what's their business with Luffy?"

"I think 'business' might be the wrong word for this," Shakky said, smiling sadly. "It's more of a closure thing."

"We're under a lot of fucking pressure, Garp," Sengoku seethed, stalking down the hall with anger and humiliation reddening his face. Garp walked silently at his side, his face set in a frown.

Sengoku had just finished a meeting with some higher ups on issues concerning, what else, Garp's punk ass offspring's…offspring. He'd stepped down more than two years ago and they were still making him run around like a little bitch for them. The cherry on top of this day was Garp barging into the room and asking with not a shred of shame where he could locate the restroom. So much for bringing him along.

"Your grandson has been a thorn in my side since he made his way into the world as a pirate, but now it's different," the ex-fleet admiral continued, waving a stack of papers in Garp's face. "Shalulia specifically wants him dead. After that bullshit revolution he sparked on Fishman Island, the reverie has not only been pushed into a corner on whether to accommodate a representative for them, but we're having to scramble to get any kind of clue as to where he might be. He hasn't arrived at any of the island's that his course was set for." He stopped walking long enough to jab a finger in Garp's chest to help amplify his point.

"They're willing to pay for the entire construction of G5, Garp. For that monkey's head on a platter. Two and a half years of stewed emotions and unexacted revenge. They're pissed. You just better hope they don't change their mind's and expect us to bring him in alive."

He looked Garp in the eye. "They want me to see this through. I don't have any official power anymore, but I've dealt with this enough that they know I can pull the strings to get done what needs to be done."

"Like I care," Garp snorted, reaching into the bag in his huge pants pocket and shoving two donuts in his mouth. Sengoku stared at the clumps of powdered sugar stuck in his beard.

"They won't be able to catch that stupid idiot anyway," he reasoned, shrugging and offering the bag to his friend. "Nobody knows where he is. Dropped off the face of the Earth after his last mishap. He's probably dead." He laughed heartily.

"I should be so lucky," Sengoku growled, large veins ticking over his forehead and neck the longer Garp laughed. Chewed donut sprayed from his mouth and landed on Sengoku's suit. "That actually brings me to the second topic discussed."

Garp took the sheet of paper Sengoku offered him and read it like it was a nuisance.

"So they've finally decided to revoke Hancock of her Shichibukai position…"

"Her ties to Luffy are unknown, but they exist. She kept fairly quiet those two years the Straw Hat's were out of commission, and it might not be farfetched to think she helped hide Luffy. We think she might know where he is. Her claims of an alliance with him during Marineford are enough to suspect she has no intention of helping us with our future endeavors. And there are others that are making their names as well, bigger and more influential than her. We have our system to consider."

Garp nodded, handing the paper back and brushing the crumbs from his beard.

"Do you know who they're sending yet? Since you've brought this up, I'm assuming they have the intention of trying to get her to talk."

"They'll send a fleet. If she is hiding the Straw Hat's, they're not willing to take any chances. They'll try to keep it civil, though…"

"How can you be so sure? Especially if they send Akainu."

"Charloss has taken an interest in her," was Sengoku's simple answer. "He's going to offer government immunity to AL if she agrees to go with him."

"Son of a bitch doesn't have enough wives already?" Garp asked sarcastically before burping loudly.

"It's a done deal. G5 will be paid for in exchange for Luffy and Hancock, and if the cards are in our favor, we may just get both in one fell swoop."

"I still think he's dead."

"SHUT THE HELL UP. YOU KNOW HE'S NOT."

Garp's laughter echoed confidently off the floor and walls of the hall, Sengoku's fuming accompanying it until they both walked out of the building.

Zoro sat cross legged on the floor, trying not to let on that he felt completely awkward still being here.

"Really, I'm fine. I should get going anyway…"

"Nyonsense," Nyon said sternly, bringing the tea tray through the huge door to Hancock's chambers and setting it down between them on a low table. "It is custom on this island that we show some gratitude when favors are done for us, even if all I can do is make some tea."

The old woman glanced over at Hancock's sleeping figure sprawled out over her huge bed. "Especially when the favor involves such an unsavory woman such as that one. Tsk. You mustn't take her chiding to heart, Roronoa Zoro," she said, handing him his cup, "Hebihime-sama is as cold as ice, and has never been one to warm up to people easily. She has a terrible personality."

Yeah. I've noticed.

Zoro sipped his tea and tried not to make eye contact.

"I am…a bit confused," Nyon continued, sweat dropping a bit, "at how things came about this way, though…"

"I did what you told me," he said flatly, setting the cup down and giving her a frog face. "She tried to execute and passed out in the middle of the process. So I carried her back here."

"Oh? And what did you have her do that would bring her to the brink of exhaustion?"

Zoro didn't really appreciate the leering grin on her face. He gritted his teeth and struggled to keep his defensive mechanism from going berserk. At the same time, he didn't feel like explaining the process Hancock had undergone to heal his shoulder. It had drained any energy she had left, so he'd brought her back immediately after it happened.

"She healed me. That's it. Or 'pain killer-ed' me. Whatever. It's not like she wasn't already pretty spent thanks to your drugs. She's here now, and I've got stuff to do." He bowed his head and stood up. "Thanks for the tea."

"Fine," Nyon sighed, waving her staff at him. "I can appreciate a man who keeps things short and to the point. I will speak to her when she awakens, and I'd actually like to have a word with her about your training…"

Zoro turned to look at her, his brow furrowed. "I can handle my own training regimen. I really don't need much of anything that she can give me."

"The Kuja pride themselves on their combat skills," Nyon boasted, puffing out her chest and staring him down. "I will see to it that Hancock teaches you the Kuja Haki."

"No offense to her or anything, but I've had more than enough of this woman," he muttered unenthusiastically, turning to head for the door.

"Have you had the opportunity to test out your skills on a logia type devil fruit user?" Nyon called at his back. Zoro stopped short and let out an exasperated sigh.

"Yeah, what's that got to do with it?"

"Luffy-san has already mastered the Busoshoku haki," Nyon continued, walking over to where he stood. "It would benefit you greatly, considering your use of swords, to have this skill. To imbue haki into your attacks guarantees that, if faced with an enemy with the power of a devil fruit of this type, you will be able to fight alongside your captain."

Zoro listened with some interest. He recalled a creepy mud guy who had given them a hard time on the ship on the way to Fishman Island. It had never really entered his mind that he could fight these types of users himself. He had grown a lot in two years, but devil fruit's were something a normal human such as himself couldn't quite grasp.

"So…if I use this 'haki' stuff, I'd be able to fight those kinds of devil fruit users better?"

Now that he thought about it, Luffy did use this 'haki' incorporated into the majority of his attacks. He had been the one to beat the shit out of the mud guy.

"That is correct," Nyon said, gesturing at his swords. "You will leave this island more knowledgeable than when you came if she does her job correctly. Which I will personyally make sure she does," she growled.

Zoro inhaled, then let out a deep breath, knowing that if he did this it meant spending considerably more time with the crazy princess. He combed a hand through his hair and shrugged.

"Alright. Fine. But if she gets bossy, I'm out."

Nyon smiled triumphantly as she watched him saunter out the door. She giggled like a school girl and blushed to herself.

He really does have a nice butt…

Zoro was startled as he closed the door, Hancock's sister Marigold holding his cleaned robe in her hand.

"Thank you for all you have done for anee-sama," she said, smiling warmly. "Nyon-baa requested we ready the bath for your use when she finished speaking with you."

"Tch. Creepy old woman," he muttered under his breath. He grabbed the robe and towel from her and waved passively before walking down the hall.

"Yeah, yeah. I get it. I probably smell by now, so just make sure that old woman doesn't peek or anything."

"Erm…Roronoa-san," Marigold started, sweat dropping, "the bath is down that hall."

Zoro whirled on his heels, blushing fiercely.

"I knew that."

Luffy's instincts were probably the one thing he could completely rely on in any situation.

Right now, the thing they were telling him to do was run.

"MUGIWARA, WHY DIDN'T YOU KICK HIS ASS," Franky roared in implied disappointment, sprinting alongside Luffy, Usopp, Chopper and Brook.

Why were they running? Well, upon Luffy's vague description of the things that had happened between himself and Margaret, Sanji had exploded into a flaming pyre of rage and insurmountable doom.

"I CAN FEEL HIM GETTING CLOSER," Chopper sobbed loudly, all of them now aware of the increasingly uncomfortable heat creeping up on them. They all skidded on the dirt road, turning a sharp corner and dashing madly for a place to…hide? There was no place to hide. A lady had been tainted. Hiding was not in Luffy's cards anymore.

"WHY THE HELL DID WE GO WITH LUFFY," Usopp bawled, snot dripping from his nose and his arms jostling in an attempt to push his legs harder.

"WHY DOES EVERYONE HATE ME TODAY," Luffy cried, anger and emotional instability making him tear up as well. Or maybe that was a common side effect of the heat wave bearing down on them like a freight train. He considered ditching his flip flops to gain that extra millisecond of awkward impact with the ground.

There was a snapping sound, and time seemed to slow down to a crawl. Luffy caught the angry blue of Sanji's iris a second before he felt his face implode with the impact of his foot. Luffy didn't feel the building pressing down into him until he'd already bounced off and returned at warp speed to receive another kick to the face.

"He just broke the fucking sound barrier," Usopp mused, eyes visibly pulsing in their sockets as he came to watch Sanji's personal take on hand ball. Chopper fainted. Franky and Brook were holding each other and crying hysterically, asking the blonde for forgiveness he currently wasn't aware he needed to give them.

Nami, Robin and Margaret jogged over with some of the crowd from the dining hall following close behind. Sanji decided he'd had enough of his game, so the next time Luffy bounced back, he gripped his rubber face like an iron vice and dragged him back over to Margaret.

"Tell me what this shit head did to you," he said in a surprisingly calm voice.

"Cook-san," Robin started, but she was stopped when he held up his other hand and shook his head.

"Robin-chan, I realize that it is in your gentle and caring nature to look out for everyone unconditionally, but this I cannot forgive."

'This' was emphasized by thrusting his unconscious captain forward and dropping him in the dust.

Robin sweat dropped and glanced at Margaret. She looked very disconcerted, her hands cupped over her mouth as she stared at Luffy.

"Margaret-chan," Sanji said softly, brushing a wisp of hair out of her eyes, "your lovely face was what brought me out of the pits of near death itself. I was a man reborn of this life to love you, to be the man that will take care of you for all eternity…"

"Right. She's definitely in need of taking care of," Nami muttered with a snicker, recalling Margaret's split second kiss reaction.

"Why is everyone mad," Margaret whimpered, a small trickle of tears rolling down her cheek. "I don't understand why everyone's mad…"

"When a man touches a woman in an unnecessary way," Sanji started gently, lighting a fresh cigarette and pointing at Luffy…

"Luffy's touch…isn't...unnecessary," Maragaret said, voice cracking a bit and one hand trying to wipe the snot from her nose. "This is my fault. Everyone's mad at Luffy because I asked him to touch me." It was a line that might've sounded funny if she hadn't been near sobbing as she said it. Robin smiled sadly and patted her head. Nami's eyes softened at the childish attempt to portray her feelings.

"Asked…" Sanji mused, frowning a little.

"Nee-chan is Mugiwara's girl," Franky offered, lifting his pinky and flashing a smile. Brook and Usopp tackled him.

"I hurt…everywhere…" Luffy gurgled pathetically, spitting dirt out of his mouth and slowly blinking his eyes.

"As you should," the cook seethed, lifting him back up by his shirt. He caught sight of the bite mark on Luffy's shoulder and narrowed his eyes.

"What the fuck is that."

"Er…" Margaret blushed ridiculously through leftover tears. "I…I did that."

Sanji looked from Margaret to Luffy, puffs of smoke seeping out from between his pursed lips. after about a minute of contemplation, he nodded his head and started dragging Luffy away.

"Sanji-kun, where are you going," Nami called, a little worried.

"To throw this idiot in the ocean," was his simple reply.

Luffy's eyes bugged out and he struggled to escape.

"SANJI YOU ASSHOLE I CAN'T SWIM."

"Precisely," the blonde said smoothly, a little smile playing at his lips.

"I've had enough drama for today I think," Robin said, sighing heavily and restraining Sanji with her arms. Margaret ran over to collect Luffy from Sanji's grasp and lifted him to his feet.

"Let's head back to the palace for now," Nami yelled, grabbing Sanji by his ear and dragging him away despite his gentle protesting. Usopp picked Chopper up and started walking with Brook. Franky started walking towards the ship, claiming he needed to start working on the roof of the bath.

"Everyone's mean today," Luffy pouted, letting Margaret support him as they trudged slowly back to the palace.

"I told you not to say anything," she replied, sighing. "And now everyone's mad at you."

"I don't get it. Do they want to touch me too?" he wondered out loud, brows furrowed in thought.

"That's definitely NOT it, you idiot," Nami said, interrupting his thoughts and pinching his cheek until he started whining again. "You're getting The Talk as soon we get back. So behave yourself, and don't get any stupid ideas until I'm done with you."

"I refuse," Hancock said bluntly, hiding her face from Nyon in a pillow.

"You have nyo room to refuse. You're doing it. And if you don't do a good job, I'm sure Luffy-san will be disappointed in you."

Hancock pondered that, wondering if maybe this was her chance to put herself back in Luffy's good graces. She hadn't seen him since yesterday despite both of them being on the island. He was probably pining for her by now.

"Fine," she said begrudgingly, dragging herself up from the comfort of her bed. "When do we start."

"Tomorrow morning," Nyon said, impressed that she'd been able to convince her fairly easily.

"Fine, fine," Hancock said again, passively flaying her hand around in an attempt to get the old woman to leave her alone.

"I think if you plan on seeing Luffy today, you should probably bathe. You look a mess," Nyon said, a hint of mischief in her voice.

Hancock looked down at herself and cringed. The swordsman's robe was gone, and had been replaced with one of her own, but her skin would become scaly and her hair would be frizzy if she didn't scrub herself soon.

"You needn't worry over who changed your clothes," Nyon said teasingly, "Sandersonia took care of that."

Hancock blushed and kicked a leg out at her adoptive mother. Nyon just dodged and scampered away giggling.

"Remember not to stay in the bath too long. You might prune up," was her final piece of advice before heading out the door.

"Hai, hai," Hancock muttered, rolling her eyes. She was too light headed to argue at the moment. She ate a grape from the fruit plate Sandersonia had brought her and grabbed the towel beside it, heading for the bath.

You both can thank me later, Nyon thought gleefully to herself, her evil laughter making the servants she passed in the hall more than a little worried for her health.

"What the hell is this," Nami said, looking around at the confusion happening around her. Women were running out of shops, and up ahead, large banners were being raised in front of the palace. Guards stood along the barrier, barking out orders for everyone to get back.

"Hebihime-sama's taking a bath," Margaret explained, frowning. "Usually she takes one at a different time…"

"Maybe she just woke up," Robin suggested. "With the medicine she was given, she might have been knocked out until around this time…"

"Why is it such a big deal that she's taking a bath? Is there some kind of ritual they have to do here?"

"She was really dirty after she came back with Zoro yesterday. I imagine she'd want to get clean again…"

"What's this shit about the Marimo and Hancock-dono," Sanji asked, his temper already being tested beyond his normal tolerance.

"Something happened yesterday and Zoro had to save her from drowning. She came back wearing his clothes," Nami said in a crafty voice, taking sick pleasure in watching Sanji overreact to just about everything. His cigarette snapped in half.

"Speaking of, where is Zoro?" Usopp asked, frowning. "He said he was going to go train this morning and we haven't seen him since."

"I caught him on his way there," Sanji growled, glaring at the way Margaret was holding onto Luffy, "I told him to go fishing for me so I could make lunch for everyone."

"He should've been back by now, right?" Nami said. Then she shrugged, rolling her eyes. "Maybe he got lost."

"Yeah that's probably it," everyone agreed simultaneously.

Zoro sneezed. A draft had definitely just blown in. He shivered a little and submerged himself further in the heated water, hearing the door click closed.

He opened his mouth to call out to whoever had just opened it, but he paled despite his flushed body and his jaw snapped shut when Hancock staggered in. He couldn't see very well through the mist, but he figured there weren't many other women that had her…figure…on this island.

I thought the old lady said-

Well, there was the problem. Never trust creepy old women when they tell you to get naked for something.

I fucking hate this island…

He lowered himself into the water until all that showed were his eyes and his green hair. Very inconspicuous.

Moving at the speed of a dead turtle, he quietly made his way to the opposite end of the water as she walked over and waded in as well, muttering to herself about her head hurting. He gathered enough courage to try to climb out and trust that the steam would cover any potential fuck up's-

"Luffy?"

Fuck. My. Life.

He couldn't say anything. His voice wouldn't come. In his panic he slipped on the edge of the stone and awkwardly fell back in. He stood up and tried to play it cool, getting ready to explain everything like a rational adult.

"Listen, I-"

He felt her wrap her arms around him and she buried her face in the crook of his neck. No words indeed.

"Luffy, I'm sorry. I want you to forgive me. I've done bad things, and I haven't acted like a wife at all," she sobbed softly.

He narrowed his eyes in suspicion. Was this a joke? He had to be the exact opposite of Luffy's build; scrawny, lithe limbs with brown hair. Was she trying to be funny? Was this her way of insulting him? Not that Luffy was an ugly guy…just…wait, was this her plan? Was she trying to get him to question his own masculinity? Was this a CHALLENGE?

He felt a kiss on his neck and he continued to stare straight ahead, wondering what he should do in this completely ridiculous situation.

"I want you to love me, Luffy," she said pitifully, squeezing him tighter against her. He struggled to breathe. "I love you so much…"

Ok. This has gone on far enough…

He tentatively placed his hands on her waist and tried to push her away. If she let go, he could make a run for it before she realized she'd been mistaken.

"You pay attention to everyone but me," she whined, refusing to let him budge even an inch. "I always have to be with your jerk swordsman…"

Veins ticked over his face as she continued to recount all of the tragic events that had befallen her because of Luffy's 'asshole first mate', the whole time trying to walk to the door while she clung to him. He backed out of the water and stepped up to the tiles, her face slipping down to press against his abs. He bent to try to push her off, but stopped when she slurred something he was sure he had misheard.

"What'd you say?"

"He's a good man," she said slowly, like she was drunk. "Your first mate…is a good man. Your whole crew…you should be proud."

And then she passed out completely again, resting over the edge of the bath and starting to snore in exhaustion. Zoro stood dumbfounded, not sure whether he was supposed to wake her up or just leave her somewhere for someone to find.

There was still some dirt and leaves stuck to her, and though he tried with all his might to let the thought die, her hair care and soap was sitting suggestively on the stool she had meant to use. He gritted his teeth and pulled at his hair and blushed in embarrassment, but he couldn't just leave her there.

Be grateful I'm not a pervert…

He swore under his breath and dragged her over to the stool, setting her down in front of him and combing out her hair with the shampoo and oil she had brought. He then scrubbed her arms and legs, looking away as best he could and being careful to avoid any area of remote sensitivity. When he got to the burn mark on her back his eyes softened and he wondered where it came from. It looked painful.

Are you afraid people will see this?

He shook his head and grunted. Wasn't his business.

Tch. Probably haven't eaten anything again. No wonder you can't stay awake.

He looked around for her clothes, couldn't find any, then decided it might be better to just put her back in her room and let her think she fell asleep after bathing herself. If he left her here her metabolism might get to the point that she would become dangerously dehydrated, and he really wanted to avoid another awkward episode at all cost. Waking her up was not something he was keen on doing.

He blushed a little, trying to figure out how to carry her. She'd get rug burn if he just dragged her, and when he threw her over one shoulder, her boobs bounced against his back and…and that option was out. So. He finally just lifted her into his arms like a bride and covered her with his clothes and threw his swords, pants and harameki on top.

A quick glance out the door revealed that there was nobody in the hallway, so he made a mad dash for her room, praying to whatever being that might exist (though he doubted it) that nobody would walk around the corner and see them both completely naked.

This is the worst vacation ever.

Pushing the door open and closed with his foot, he stumbled over to throw her back in bed. He gave her the finger and took his robe back from her sprawled out body. He refrained from covering her because he didn't want it to look like someone had put her there.

When he reached for his swords, which had rolled over to the other side of her, he carelessly let his eyes linger over her body. She was, as everyone hailed her to be, probably the most physically attractive woman he had ever seen.

It's a shame you're so bipolar.

He dropped the swords on his pants and harameki and leaned over to see if she had a fever. She was warm, though it was hard to tell if it was from a fever or just getting out of the bath. He sighed and pushed her bangs from her forehead, blushing when a thought came into his mind…

I guess, if you think I'm such a good man, there must be something about you that's not so detestable…

He leaned over her face, intent on seeing if her forehead was hotter than his…

"Hebihime-sama should be finished changing soon. She will receive you in here..." Nyon said, bustling herself and the rest of the crew through the door. Zoro's eyes bugged out and he lost his balance trying to fly away from the, now more than ever, naked woman underneath him. It didn't quite work out, and everyone stared from across the room as he tried to lift himself up off of her chest.

"Oh my. Perhaps I should have knocked first," Nyon said in a syrupy voice, completely satisfied with how this looked.

"This isn't…" Zoro succeeded in climbing off, and turned to face his nakama with his robe undone, "what it looks like."

"Oh my god," Nami whispered miserably, face palming and now looking overtly depressed because Zoro was supposed to be the one she could count on to be fairly normal. Robin grinned at his exposed front. Luffy blinked, still leaning on a blushing but fairly curious Margaret.

"It's bigger than yours, Luffy…"

Luffy glared at her, kind of annoyed that she showed some interest.

"I…don't know if I can take much more of this…" Usopp said, falling to his knees with Chopper still passed out in his arms. "I don't even know what to believe anymore…"

"YOHOHOHO it appears we came in at the wrong time. Although, I don't have eyes to see…"

"LET ME EXPLAIN, DAMMIT," Zoro yelled, stuffing his feet through his pant legs and blushing furiously.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON," Sanji screamed, fisting his hair, "IS EVERYONE GETTING LAID EXCEPT ME?"

"Why all the noise," Hancock barked, sitting up and regarding everyone. She looked down at herself, then at Luffy, blushed and hid herself under the covers.

"WHY…WHY AM I NAKED?"

"YOU MEAN IT WASN'T CONSENSUAL?" Nami screeched, preparing to beat the shit out of Zoro.

"WE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING," he bellowed, pointing at Nyon. "SHE TOLD ME TO TAKE A BATH."

"AND SO YOU GET NAKED TOGETHER?"

"So much yelling," Robin said, holding her head and frowning. "I'm getting a headache."

"OH MY GOD YOU SAW ME NAKED?" Hancock screamed, throwing a pillow at Zoro.

"YEAH, WELL, WOULDN'T BE THE FIRST TIME, WOULD IT?" he countered.

"THIS HAS HAPPENED BEFORE?" Nami was going to go into cardiac arrest.

"NOTHING HAPPENED," he protested.

"I DON'T WANT TO BE MARRIED TO THIS," Hancock sobbed, pointing at Zoro.

"WE AREN'T MARRIED," he screamed, teeth bared.

"Hancock finally got married? Congratulations!" Luffy called cheerfully, then blinked in confusion. "Hey…what's 'married' mean?"

Hancock burst into tears. Sanji tackled Zoro and Robin had to separate them. Nami raged to herself, vowing to kill everyone before this trip was over. Usopp sat crying, holding Chopper like a teddy bear and rocking back and forth. Brook laughed hysterically at everything. Luffy tried to explain that 'of course Zoro's dick is fat since he's fat'….

"And the day isn't even over," Nyon mused, grinning to herself as Marigold and Sandersonia burst in, frantically trying to figure out what was happening.

Nami finally caught enough breath to holler, "EVERYONE. NOW. ON THE SUNNY. EMERGENCY MEETING. AND NOBODY EATS UNTIL WE FIGURE OUT WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON."
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