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Learning to Land	By : Suteishichic Category: Prince of Tennis/Tennis no Ohjisama > General Views: 11419 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Prince of Tennis (Tennis no Ohjisama), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Learning to Land. Chapter Eighty One ~Tachibana~

Warnings: Yaoi, Love, Angst, Fluff, and Lots of Sex. Some kink. You've been warned ;)

Disclaimer: Nope not mine. Still in my dreams. ;)

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And then when they were both done, the silence between them stretched out.

Yasuo broke it, "I won." He did not sound pleased. Instead he sounded as unsure as Tachibana felt.

"Yeah. You did." Tachibana had to live with him. He had to make this right, act normally, and his normal self hated to lose. So he joked, "Damn it." They both laughed though it was more to dispel the tension between them than because it was funny.

Yasuo asked, "Think you can sleep now?"

"Yeah. Goodnight." Tachibana didn't know what else to say and felt uncomfortable.

Yasuo said goodnight back and settled down as if to sleep, but Tachibana knew him by now. He was as wide awake as Tachibana was. He waited to hear Yasuo's usual deep breathing and did not hear it for a very long time. Sleep came eventually, but not before Tachibana reviewed everything several times over. Maybe they shouldn't have done this. They probably should have kept things the way they were.

In the morning he woke up earlier than normal. Yasuo was asleep still. Tachibana did not wake him but quietly gathered his things and went to shower.

For the rest of the week, he avoided Yasuo whenever he could. It had not been too difficult because they had some tests going on around then. He stayed up late studying with friends and for the first two nights slept over one of his friend's dorm rooms because he was too exhausted to walk down the hall.

When he did run into Yasuo, nothing seemed different, so after a couple of days he relaxed a little. They didn't talk about it, and Tachibana did not touch himself for days. The group of guys on his floor that he was good friends with wanted to celebrate the end of their tests by watching one of those pornos together.Everyone was into it because of the the guys just got some new ones that were supposed to be really hot. Tachibana went along as did Yasuo.

Tachibana sat up front with his friends, but when he heard a few guys around him pull down their zippers and start, he felt weird and uncomfortable. For the first time, this didn't seem so cool or a thrill anymore. He wasn't turned on. He wasn't hard at all and he had a strange feeling that the guys--his friends who were sitting on either side of him were watching him. They were almost waiting for him to begin which was odd because they already had their erections out and in their hands.

He was saved by the bell. Literally. His cell phone rang scaring him and he jumped about a meter in the air. He had forgotten it was on or even with him, and he quickly excused himself. Outside in the hall he answered it. It was his sister An who called to chat as she did about once a week. He told her to hang on and left to take the call. He went back to his room because to talk to his sister even outside of a room full of guys doing that to themselves while watching dirty things felt completely wrong. It was only as he walked down to his room that he felt the tension leave his body. He had been really stressed he realized only at that moment and he tried to figure out why.

He was really grateful that An called right then. It was always good to talk to her, even if she did have a bit of a hero-worship thing going on when it came to him. She always made him laugh. An told him she was taking tennis more seriously so they could play the next time he was home. She said she would beat him for sure this time. She often challenged him like that and it always made him smile. An as usual rambled on to him for about twenty minutes or so about everything she was into. It ranged from music to anime to tennis to family gossip, and then as usual before she got off the phone, she asked if he had any cute friends she might like. Could he send pictures? An was a little boy crazy, but still adorable. Still he was glad she was going to an all-girls school where she wouldn't be exposed to jerks like him and his friends for a few years. He thought about the room full of his friends and what they were doing and wondered how any girl could ever think a guy was cute.

After taking the call, Tachibana decided not to go back. He would rather stay in his room alone than walk back in or feel weird again. He figured he could tell his friends the next day that he had been tired from studying or something. He thought about touching himself, and while it was tempting after so long with nothing, especially as he was finally alone, the thought of Yasuo returning and maybe catching him doing that made his blood run cold. Instead he read a chapter of the book he hadn't had time to read lately and then turned in early.

Some time later, Yasuo returned and probably figuring Tachibana was asleep, just quietly climbed up into his bed. He listened as Yasuo settled down and felt annoyed.

Tachibana had been very worried about all this and Yasuo was able to just go to sleep? Was Tachibana making too much of this? He guessed so but thought he would check. He asked quietly in case Yasuo was too tired to talk, "Movie any good?"

Yasuo gasped, "Damn, you scared me! I thought you were sleeping." He laughed at being frightened and Tachibana chuckled at it. It felt good to laugh together after days of not talking. "Good? One of those movies? Nah. I got out of there early. Doma has a ton of new ones he lifted from his brother again. They're all the same. Big blonds with fake boobs who yell and scream but are probably having fake orgasms. Everyone else was still there and into it when I left to wash up."

Tachibana laughed, "Yeah that sounds about right. I was done when I saw what it was. Doma's such an idiot, his brother will kick his ass once he finds his stuff stolen again. Then Doma'll come back and tell us how he beat his brother up."

Yasuo laughed. Doma had a huge older brother who was a big name in kendo fighting. Tachibana figured the guy liked it when his big brother beat him up because every time he went home, Doma did something stupid to guarantee it would happen. It ranged from him stealing his brother's porn to alcohol to once stealing his condoms. Not that Doma ever needed them, but his brother apparently found them missing during a heated moment with a girl. He had been furious. Furious enough that Doma came back to school his next trip with a black eye and another tall tale of how he beat up his hulk of a brother.

They laughed for a moment and then the silence yawned between them again. Tachibana had given this enough thought to know he wanted things to be back how they had been before. Not tense and awkward like this. He was embarrassed but took a chance, "So, you do anything? You know?"

Yasuo didn't answer right away. Tachibana figured he had just shocked him, and was going to change the question or tell him to forget it when he said, "No...I don't really like to in front of anyone else. Feels weird when they all start up."

Tachibana agreed in a way, especially because he suspected now, some of the other guys did watch. He felt people checking him out before and thought maybe it was his imagination. This time he knew it wasn't although he wasn't sure why they would want to watch him. Maybe they compared things. Or maybe something else.

He never really liked it. The first time was kind of a kick because it was something so forbidden. Tachibana kind of did it with everyone after that only because he always felt like he had to because his friends were. To not go would have been weird, and he might have been made fun of. It wasn't until he left the room when he realized he didn't care for it. He would have to think of some excuse to not go back. Probably if he could make fun of Doma it would be all right.

Yasuo went on, "I don't know. Feels different with you. I mean, you're like my brother or something because I've known you so long, you know? So I watch the videos with everyone, but I wait. I think it's better if I do it here than risk getting caught on the toilet or something..." Their teammates had mortifying pictures of guys sitting on the toilet going at it and caught in the act. They were jokes and it was funny, but it was a joke you never wanted to be on the receiving end of.

"Yeah, I hear that." Tachibana decided to take another chance to maybe put things right, "Hey? You got any more of that lotion stuff?" He was already hard so he figured he might as well.

"Yeah. Why? You want to? I will if you will." Tachibana said he would and caught the lotion when Yasuo threw it down to him. Yasuo sounded like he was smiling, "Should we see who is first or last?"

Tachibana grinned, "You done it since we did last time?"

Yasuo said he hadn't. That he had been busy with tests and hadn't felt like it.

Just the same as Tachibana. He smiled and felt his competitive spirit rise, "Then let's make it challenging. Whoever's last wins. I still owe you for curry. Let's go double or nothing." He tossed the lotion back up and when Yasuo said he was ready they started. Tachibana thought about a lot of things while he stroked and tried to distract himself so he could win. He felt bad in a way for avoiding Yasuo but knew they would never talk about it and that he should let it go. This was good though that they were back to where they had been before. It was great things would be normal again.

Tachibana won of course, coming just after he heard Yasuo.

Things continued as "normal" with them doing this nightly for at least a month or so. Around then Yasuo sprained his ankle at practice and they separated the bunk beds so he didn't have to climb up to the top bunk. Tachibana didn't like heights so they couldn't really switch. Over time it progressed to where they were doing it side by side. Watching each other come was hot. They discovered soon after that it felt even better when someone else did it for you, and kissing while doing it felt incredible. So, yeah Yasuo liked to kiss around when they did that but they weren't boyfriends or anything. Sure, a few times Yasuo even sucked him off which was really amazing, but Yasuo was the one who asked Tachibana if he could. He had been the one that wanted to try it and he never asked Tachibana to reciprocate. No way Tachibana would have.

Well, not before Fuji.

He had been hurt and seething over the next few days when the tensai ignored him. Fuji never even looked at him for days after that first kiss. The tensai seemed instead to like that damn girl with the big teeth. She wasn't even that cute and Tachibana could not believe after all that heat they shared in that kiss and how they had connected, that Fuji felt nothing.

Tachibana had been upset when he overheard Fuji and the girl make plans to meet up. Shocked and so upset that he followed them on their date. She and Fuji took a nice, long romantic walk. They held hands at one point and then the tensai walked her back to her cabin. Tachibana watched in heartbroken pain as Fuji kissed her and she giggled. The hot peppers Fuji had eaten in a stupid contest at dinner were burning her mouth. They laughed about it and kissed more.

The angry rage Tachibana had felt at losing to Fuji was nothing compared to the jealous burn he felt eating at him as he watched Fuji kiss her. Fuji kissed him back, but the tensai never kissed him like this. Like Fuji wanted to. She went inside finally and Fuji started walking back to his cabin with a smile on his lips. Tachibana grabbed him. He meant to just scare him or act casually about it as if it didn't bother him, maybe even make fun of Fuji and joke around. He had thought to turn it all into a big joke and maybe just be friends or something until Fuji realized he had feelings for Tachibana, but it didn't work out like that.

The second he had Fuji back in his reach and they were alone, he pressed the guy up to a tree and said something about wanting to see if it really burned. Then he kissed Fuji. It did burn his mouth like hell but he was long past caring. He wanted to kiss away any memory Fuji had of that stupid ugly girl and replace it with himself. He wanted Fuji to want him and only him. He wanted Fuji to kiss him. After a while of kissing, the burn of jealousy cooled to be replaced by one of pure desire that Tachibana knew both of them shared. The tensai's arms were around him. Fuji kissed him hotly back and purred in his mouth.

Tachibana suddenly had to make sure it was him that Fuji wanted. That his kiss and touch was the one that was turning Fuji on and not that girl. Was Fuji really even turned on or was he faking it and really just afraid because Tachibana scared him? He slid his hands down Fuji's hard body and into his shorts to check. He went to touch Fuji like he and Yasuo did only to be surprised at how large Fuji was. Did the guy always have to surprise him? Did he always have to have unexpected counters to Tachibana's every move?

Fuji was so large it didn't seem real and yes, he was hard. Tachibana suddenly wanted to be Fuji's first in many ways. The girl might have touched Fuji last but Tachibana was here now. He could touch Fuji in another way. One Yasuo had with him, but he had never back. Something the girl hadn't done yet that Tachibana knew would feel really good. Saying something lame about wanting to see how sensitive Fuji was, with his heart thundering in his ears, Tachibana dropped to his knees and took Fuji in his mouth.

This he knew without any doubt was a gay thing to do. There were no excuses for him doing this. No way he could say it just kind of happened or was to relieve tension or was something someone else did to him. Fuji hadn't even asked him to.

Tachibana was the one doing this to another guy and he was doing it because he wanted to. It was hard to swallow--literally. The guy was too big and there was no doubt that as pretty as Fuji was, he truly was a guy. Fuji gasped when Tachibana licked at him and took his tip between his lips and Tachibana was suddenly scared that Fuji would come in his mouth.

He wasn't ready to handle anything like that.

So he stopped after a moment or two, got up, and went back to kissing Fuji. It seemed important because he never kissed Yasuo after Yasuo did this to him. And Yasuo let him come, but even if he hadn't, Tachibana always refused to kiss him again until he brushed his teeth.

He thought Fuji would do the same to him, but he didn't. Maybe the tensai didn't know any better, or maybe he was too turned on to care. Fuji kissed him and tried to touch him, but Tachibana was so turned on at the tensai wanting him, he was afraid he would come and would be the one to come first. He was so hard he felt like he might even just come in his shorts at just a touch from Fuji. His head swam and he felt actually sick from being so turned on and a little from thinking about what he just did to a guy. No way was he going to get sick in front of Fuji who would laugh at him and maybe even be disgusted.

Tachibana turned and walked away. He gulped at the cool night air and tried to get his pulse to stop racing and his stomach to stop churning. Eventually he made his way back to his cabin and stood for a very long time under the cold spray of a shower, trying to drown the thoughts in his head. It didn't work.

He wished that night as he tossed around in his bunk that he could stop his thoughts which went from a frenzied panic at what he had done to frantically trying to plan his next move to win Fuji from that girl once and for all. He didn't think he was gay. He didn't want to be gay, but he knew he did want Fuji. That he was sure of. Half the time he wanted to move closer to Fuji and the other half of the time he thought the smartest thing he could do was to just quit the camp and never see Fuji again. He had a suspicion though from how much it hurt to think about leaving and never seeing Fuji again that even if he did leave, these sort of thoughts wouldn't just stop.

It didn't help the next day that Fuji and that girl hung out again. Tachibana watched them for as long as he could stand it. He suspected that Fuji was using her to make him jealous. He hoped that was what it was--a game the tensai was playing. Whatever it was, it worked.

Fuji had Tachibana so jealous that he never thought of the consequences of his actions and kept chasing the tensai. He stopped worrying if he was gay because all he wanted was Fuji. He had enough to worry about with Fuji going between him and that girl. He was hoping the whole time that Fuji would finally admit that he liked Tachibana. He just wanted Fuji to say it. Then he could think about his next step.

It was like Tachibana was sick and feverish with longing to hear Fuji say he liked him and reach for him. Only when he was with Fuji did this fever cool and his brain start working again. Then it only reminded him over and over again that they were two guys and this shouldn't be happening. Tachibana tried to resist. He tried to fight both his heart and his head and lost miserably.

Then about two weeks of this happening over and over, again and again, Fuji with him one moment and the girl the next, Fuji approached Tachibana and said they had to talk. They went to one of the empty cabins and he waited to hear Fuji finally confess. Tachibana was prepared to tell Fuji he liked him back. Damn the consequences, good or bad, he really liked him and wanted Fuji to know. He even thought maybe he could talk about all the stuff he was worried about with Fuji. Maybe the tensai would understand and be able to help him. Once he knew their hearts were together, then maybe they could figure out the rest together too, right?

Of course not. Fuji always countered him. Smiling as if it didn't bother him at all, Fuji told Tachibana that it was over. He was going to keep dating the girl and Tachibana should leave him alone. It was over.

Tachibana felt like someone punched him in the stomach. He couldn't believe this was happening. He was so hurt he didn't even have time to feel jealous or angry. He pulled Fuji close to him and kissed him.

Despite his words that it was over, Fuji kissed him back and Tachibana realized for the first time that the only reason he could figure that Fuji didn't reach for him was because maybe Fuji was scared too. Fuji obviously did have feelings for him even if he hadn't confessed. Maybe the tensai was only reaching for the girl because she was the "proper" thing to reach for. Tachibana refused to let that happen. This felt too good and too right to be wrong. Fuji was just confused. Maybe only when he was with Tachibana was he able to think right too.

He kept kissing Fuji and said in between kissing his lips, his face, his neck, "Tell me you don't like me and I'll go. Say it once and I'm gone." He went to drop to his knees to take Fuji in his mouth again. This time he decided he wouldn't stop even if Fuji came in his mouth. He was going to show Fuji he could do this, that he wanted to do this.

Despite the tensai's words that it was over and he wanted to only date the girl, the tensai was obviously turned on by his kiss and his touch, but Fuji protested with a smile, "Ne, Tachibana, I just played a long set. I'm all sweaty. Please..."

He wasn't saying no though. He never said he didn't want to or that he didn't want or like Tachibana. Tachibana didn't care if Fuji was sweaty. He told Fuji he didn't care. All he wanted was to make Fuji his. To make Fuji love him. Fuji had to feel the same way he did. If he could only make Fuji see and feel how right this was everything would be all right. Somehow they ended up naked, their clothes quickly ripped off each other, together in one of the empty cabin's showers. Fuji was kissing him and his bare leg was wrapped around Tachibana's waist. He held Tachibana close and purred in pleasure.

Without thinking about it or the consequences, Tachibana started to make love to him. Started to enter him. It just felt natural. It just felt right.

Fuji stopped him and said, "Ne, not that way, like this..." He turned around, presented to Tachibana his strong and beautiful back, and pulled Tachibana to him. "This way..." Fuji put his hand on Tachibana's erection and lined it up with his entrance.

Tachibana again started to enter him. He had never done this before. He never really thought this would happen and didn't really know what he was doing. He hadn't planned this out, but was afraid to stop because then Fuji wouldn't like him. He would go back to the girl and say it was over unless Tachibana showed him.

And then Tachibana couldn't stop because after these weeks of frustration where he hadn't even masturbated, being inside Fuji was the most amazing thing he had ever experienced. He wanted Fuji to feel good too but didn't know how. Fuji didn't seem to be in pain, but did he like it? It was the most important thing in the world that Fuji like it. Like him. Tachibana felt around and Fuji was still hard. All Tachibana could think to do was to touch Fuji and stroke him the way he had Yasuo. He started to, but then a strange thing happened. When he stroked Fuji, the tensai stopped responding and went dead in his arms.

Up until then, Fuji had been breathing hard and sighing these hot pleasure noises. At his hand's touch though, Fuji went cold. He thought maybe he wasn't supposed to do that, and even started to pull out of Fuji in case he was hurting him. He asked, feeling worried, "Fuji...?"

Fuji suddenly came back from whatever that was. An orgasm? He didn't come so Tachibana wasn't sure. Fuji moaned, "Ah! Kippei, touch me...please..."

The sound of Fuji saying his given name in such a sexy way drove him wild. He tried this two more times though because he wanted Fuji to feel good. Every time he touched Fuji, the guy stopped responding. Fuji asked Tachibana to touch him, but stopped moving whenever he was touched. The moment Tachibana stopped, Fuji moaned and seemed to enjoy it again. Especially when Tachibana thrust sort of down when he was all the way inside him. It must have felt good to Fuji because when he did that, the tensai begged Tachibana to touch him more.

It was strange and incredible and it lasted at most probably only two minutes. Then Tachibana couldn't hold back from coming any longer. He groaned and cried out Fuji's name as he came. When he was done, he noticed that Fuji had come at some time during also, it was splashed all over the wall of the shower the tensai was up against, even though the tensai made no sounds.

He kissed Fuji at least a hundred times and asked Fuji if he liked him. Fuji nodded yes. Tachibana asked if it was okay, if Fuji enjoyed it, and the tensai nodded yes again. He asked if Fuji would see only him and not that girl again and Fuji nodded yes. Deliriously happy, he told Fuji he liked him too and would only see him.

Tachibana told him he would find him later because he wanted to talk, but he knew it was getting late and he had to go. He had a match in a little while. If he didn't show up he would be DQed and sent home. Neither one of them wanted that. Fuji seemed to want to stay in the shower longer so Tachibana kissed him about a thousand times. Feeling great about everything, he left Fuji there.

There were no towels in the empty cabin, so he used paper towels over by the sinks to dry himself off and just barely made his match in time. He won of course, even though his hair was soaking wet and sticking up all crazy. He didn't even notice it until he went back to his cabin. When he saw himself in the mirror he laughed and looked forward to telling Fuji about it later. He went shower properly and then re-dressed for dinner, feeling excited about seeing Fuji.

Tachibana looked for Fuji at dinner but he wasn't around. He looked for him afterward too trying to not be obvious so no one knew they liked each other, but he couldn't find him anywhere. He even found the girl but she was with some of the other girls and not Fuji. Someone, when he asked around, said Fuji had gone to bed early and even missed dinner.

Disappointed at not seeing him but still happy, Tachibana went to his own bunk. He even thought of writing a letter to Yasuo to tell him about everything he was experiencing but instead decided to read a book he brought along instead. Tachibana was so happy and all he could think about was Fuji.

He read the same page about fifty times and then gave up and went to bed. He dreamed of Fuji laughing and smiling and kissing him all night. He woke up hard and missed the tensai. Sometimes he and Yasuo fell asleep in the same bed when they were too tired to separate. He never admitted it, but he always liked the feeling when Yasuo in his sleep had thrown an arm or leg over him. He knew if it was Fuji in his bed, he would love it.

The next morning, a rare free day where they were all supposed to rest, he found out Fuji wasn't feeling well.

Worried, Tachibana found the tensai alone in the infirmary and then spent the entire day with him. At first they just talked and kissed but most of the day Tachibana spent making love to him. It was amazing and romantic and he never felt anything like it before. He never felt like this before for anyone. They spent all day together talking and laughing and getting to know each other. Tachibana thought he was in love with Fuji before this, but now was a million times better.

It was the most incredible day Tachibana ever had. They couldn't stop touching each other or kissing. They even dozed for a while holding each other close and naked, and when they woke up they made love again. They came together which felt incredible. Sometimes Fuji went dead in his arms when Tachibana touched him, but it seemed to happen less and less as they made love more and more often. Just when he thought he couldn't feel any better and nothing would bring him down, Fuji said he loved him.

Tachibana warned Fuji to not fall in love with him. He wasn't being mean, he just wanted to be honest. He was confused and smitten. Both at the same time. It was a wonderful and terrifying place to be. He tried to talk to Fuji about it and explain to him how some of this worried him, but every time he tried to express himself, Fuji kissed him quiet. He thought Fuji was saying that everything would be all right in a kiss and to not worry because Fuji understood, but looking back later he figured out he didn't get that right at all.

Because over the next few days, every time he tried to take a breath or wanted to just talk because he was scared and confused, Fuji reached for the girl. The rest of their time at the camp followed this pattern. It seemed to be almost a game to the tensai to make and keep him jealous and off-balance so that Tachibana couldn't even clearly think.

He would feel afraid and need to just talk instead of having sex, and Fuji would take it like a rejection. He would immediately run to the girl and spend time with her. Fuji wasn't having sex with her and Tachibana was jealous that Fuji could just hang around her and talk to her when he didn't seem to be able to do that with Tachibana. He didn't understand.

Each time Fuji did this,Tachibana would chase after him and win him back. Fuji would promise to only be with him after they had sex, and would say he loved him over and over again. Tachibana would be angry with Fuji, and then forgive him because he figured at the time that maybe being with the girl was just Fuji's way of being scared too. Fuji said he loved him.

The day they were both dreading finally arrived. The day they were going to play each other. Only this time it would count. Because they each had pretty much beaten everyone else, the loser would not be sent home, but it was hard on them both anyway. Fuji offered to let him win, but Tachibana adamantly refused. He didn't need that and even had to threaten Fuji to get him to agree to play him seriously. Who knew what might happen? Tachibana finally had to say if Fuji didn't play him full on he would never talk to him again because he was afraid the tensai would throw the game. Even the thought of not talking to him again broke his own heart as much as it seemed to Fuji's, but he thought it might work.

Until they were out there, and he could see Fuji looking at him. He looked so sad as if he felt sorry for Tachibana. Which was enraging. He kept looking at Tachibana strangely, maybe as a lover instead of an opponent, but no matter what the tensai would not play him seriously. Tachibana grew angry and wondered if Fuji was somehow rejecting him openly in front of everyone. Fuji not playing full on made Tachibana not want to play his best either. Fuji won but it didn't really count to Tachibana. As Fuji never really played him, he refused to shake the tensai's hand at the end of the match.

People thought he was being a sore loser, but he wasn't. Fuji promised to play him seriously and then went back on his word. It hurt Tachibana and not just his pride that Fuji thought he needed his help in tennis. He loved that part of Fuji that could beat him and had wanted to see it again. Even if he lost. Didn't Fuji understand that? Tachibana was strong. He had worked hard and he wanted Fuji to be as proud of him as he was of Fuji. Didn't Fuji feel that?

And Tachibana had other things to think and worry about. Did he really want someone who the moment he hesitated or got scared reached for someone else? All the problems Tachibana would have to face falling in love with a guy, how could they be worth it if the moment there was a problem Fuji went to a girl? If Fuji was more into girls then he should stop messing with Tachibana who had enough problems. He was going back to school soon enough and wondered where this, whatever this was between them, was going if anywhere. He was completely worried that he was gay and what it would mean but at the same time, it physically hurt to think he might never see Fuji again.

He tried to avoid Fuji and figure out what to do. Tachibana knew he couldn't think around him and he was angry at Fuji for trying to throw their game. He decided to test the tensai. Fuji finally came to find him days after the match and tried to put his arms around him. The tensai innocently asked what was wrong.

As if he didn't know when he was the only other person who knew that Tachibana was hurt and why after Fuji broke his promise. Tachibana said to leave him alone just like Fuji had when he told Tachibana it was over but didn't really mean it. Instead of pursuing him like Fuji should have, the tensai walked away.

Tachibana was shocked and heartbroken. Fuji didn't love him. If he did, he wouldn't have walked away. Fuji would probably run right back to that girl. This was all a mess and he decided to see for himself so that he knew once and for all Fuji's heart. And then he would confront the tensai and be done with him.

He went to "their" abandoned cabin to think about things and wait. He hoped what he thought might happen wouldn't, but sure enough, Fuji and the girl walked in soon after. To Tachibana's horror, Fuji made love to her without even sensing Tachibana was there. Tachibana was so upset he didn't even realize he was silently crying. He listened as the girl told Fuji many times that she loved him. Thankfully, she left first after she and Fuji had a long talk about how because they went to different schools. She said and Fuji quickly agreed that even with her feelings for the tensai, they could only be friends.

So that was how Fuji had felt all along. Fuji could only be friends with Tachibana and Fuji knew it all along. It was only stupid Tachibana who thought this meant anything more to the tensai. Tachibana came out from where he was hidden while Fuji was still getting dressed. He was so angry and hurt he was yelling and crying at the same time. Sometime during their fight, Tachibana suddenly knew why this hurt so much. Fuji wasn't just his first sex partner, Fuji was much more than that. Fuji was his first love. He loved Fuji.

And before he could stop himself, he was telling Fuji that. Confessing.

He ended up somehow in Fuji's arms crying and then they were kissing and eventually, Fuji was on top of him making love to him. Inside him. It hurt so much and at the same time, it was the only thing that kept his heart from feeling like it was shattering and his brain from over-thinking so he didn't tell Fuji to stop. He bit back the tears and bit down on his bottom lip so hard from the pain that it bled.

It was excruciatingly painful and at the same time, it was the most emotionally intense thing he had ever experienced. Fuji said he loved him over and over again. The tensai told Tachibana he was his first and only love. Tachibana didn't even care anymore that it might all be lies. It didn't feel like lies when Fuji said it. It felt like Fuji meant it. It didn't feel wrong when they were together even though they were both guys. It felt like the only thing in the world that was right.

When Fuji was done, they talked for a long time and held each other. Both of them laughed and cried together. It felt like when they were together in the infirmary again. Tachibana was just thinking how perfect this was...and then Fuji and in an astounding finishing move, struck and destroyed Tachibana completely.

When school started again his old roommate Yasuo never let up being nice and cool about things. Even though Tachibana after that summer and what happened with Fuji returned to school a very different person, Yasuo was always a good friend to him. Maybe even his only true friend.

Tachibana left the most popular guy in school and was been completely confident in himself. When he came back he was a heartbroken, lovesick wreck. He was a shell of his former self and felt lost and defeated. He faked that everything was all right though. He had to or he might have lost everything. His place. His hard work. His parent's sacrifices. Everything.

He tried his hardest to just seem normal and act like his old self even though he now hated so many things in his life and his world that he used to love. Everything that once seemed so important now felt hollow and meaningless. Especially his friends and the things that were important to them. He started to loathe them and their financially set, shallow little lives. He spent as little time as possible with them and more and more time alone in his room or with Yasuo.

To his surprise, no one really even noticed. They probably talked behind his back and he suspected they probably thought he was being stuck up and felt too good for them, but no one said anything to him. No one reached out to him or even asked if everything was all right.

Tachibana made a few excuses and no one questioned him. He said he was too tired to hang out with his friends. He said his back was bothering him when his tennis game was off and after that his supposedly such close friends left him alone. A few opportunistic jerks--some who still pretended to be his friend did try to take his place and kick him while he was down. They thought he was injured and would be easy to challenge. Tachibana fought them back brutally. He held onto his singles one spot. It was all he had left.

After a few days people stopped talking to him almost all together. Everyone except Yasuo who said he was worried and was around if Tachibana wanted to talk. Yasuo said he knew something was wrong and whatever it was, he would just listen. He even let Tachibana be the one who to come to him and talk whenever he was ready. And Tachibana soon enough was ready. What he went through and his feelings were eating at him, and burning him out trying to hold it all in and together.For the first time in his life he had a horrible secret that he had to keep from everyone. But Yasuo wasn't everyone. He was Tachibana's friend. Yasuo and Tachibana even eventually did other sex things. Yasuo said it would help Tachibana get over the girl, and eventually it did.

Tachibana had lied and told Yasuo he was all hung up over a girl--who had been abused by her father and brother. He had to say that even though it wasn't the truth because he had to explain what was going on within him to another person or he worried he might go crazy. He had to tell some version of what happened because it was hard enough for him to live with what he did. He wanted more than anything one person to understand and be on his side. Yasuo seemed to be, even though Tachibana wasn't strong enough to tell him everything, just opening up that little bit helped.

Still, Tachibana was heartsick, literally physically heartsick over Fuji. He had fallen in love with and had sex with Fuji--a guy. That alone was enough to turn his world upside-down. But even worse, flushed with love, upset and jealous, Tachibana stupidly even let Fuji have sex with him. As the bottom. Before the ramifications that Tachibana had allowed such a gay thing to happen and before what it meant fully hit him, before he could even deal with how much sex on the bottom physically hurt--Fuji had crushed any hopes Tachibana had.

The beautiful boy Tachibana thought was a pure angel broke his heart.

Fuji told him in specific and horrible details how his father and younger brother had raped and abused him basically his entire life.

As he listened to Fuji, Tachibana was filled with rage and fear and remorse. He apologized for how roughly he treated Fuji while he was falling for him. He explained to Fuji that he had been confused by Fuji returning over and over to that girl, because at the same time the tensai had kept letting Tachibana have sex with him. Fuji, from Tachibana's point of view, seemed to be playing with both Tachibana and this girl. Meanwhile, Tachibana was rocked with his fears about falling for a guy and had been struggling to cope with what that all really meant.

Tachibana had finally come to sort of understand his feelings for Fuji were love. Really and truly, no matter what else he thought and felt, he loved Fuji. He also thought he understood Fuji. He thought Fuji loved him too, but Tachibana was nowhere near thinking what tomorrow would bring when this was literally dumped on him.

Even worse, because they'd had sex and said they'd loved each other, Fuji seemed to now expect Tachibana to somehow save him. And Fuji's little brother too. Tachibana thought it might even be the guy who raped Fuji that the tensai wanted him to save. It was crazy. It was unthinkable. It was insane. Fuji asked Tachibana several times if he and his little brother could come live with Tachibana--who up until then hadn't even told Fuji that he went away to school. When he did, Fuji offered to move in with him there and go to school there with him.

Fuji offered to be his roommate when Tachibana already had a roommate. What the hell was he supposed to say to Yasuo? Sorry, I met this guy, fell in love,and he's my boyfriend now so you have to go? And if things between them didn't work out, if Fuji decided he liked that girl or some other girl better, would Tachibana be stuck and responsible for Fuji forever?

And it would totally mess up the tennis team that they had worked so hard for. Tachibana's place as singles one up until then was fairly secure. He had worked hard his whole life for it. He was focused on winning nationals and then being accepted by scholarship to the best tennis high school in Japan. He had a dream and a plan. He was going to pay his parents back for all their hard work and sacrifice. With Fuji joining and being so good, someone would be dropped off the regulars roster and it would be just his luck if it was nationally-ranked, first singles him.

And on the other hand, Tachibana really fell hard for Fuji. He truly loved Fuji. Or at least he thought he did. Even though they were both guys. This was all too new for him to know for sure. If he didn't help the tensai, what would Fuji do? He even asked.

Fuji just smiled, but now Tachibana saw how much pain was reflected within that smile. Fuji that night joked about killing himself. Tachibana felt his heart constrict in pain and fear, because the beautiful boy clearly was not joking about it at all. If Tachibana didn't save him, would Fuji kill himself?

Tachibana wondered how the hell he had gotten into this and had no idea what to do. They were too young to even run away together--not that they had anywhere to go. He was scared. He had responsibilities damn it, to his family who had worked so hard, and to himself after years of hard work and sacrifice, and to his tennis team. He was on the fast track to becoming the number one school's captain, the guy everyone expected to win All-Japan while still a Junior, he had everything ahead for him going his way, and then this?

He had gone from being responsible for no one and nothing but himself to being someone's whole world and savior in one night? How had this happened? How could he have been so wrong about someone? Fuji just had sex with that girl and now he expected Tachibana to become his hero? They both were just kids. Hell, Tachibana was just a kid! What the hell was he supposed to do?

He thought he was Fuji's first everything because Fuji had been his first, and yet it turned out Fuji was way more experienced than he ever was. In horror Tachibana suddenly worried that they hadn't been safe or had safe sex. What if he was sick or infected with something? What would he tell his family? His sister had always looked up to him. His friends would never understand. His parents would be devastated. He was their only son.

He made Fuji promise not to kill himself and honestly told him he loved him over and over again, and then to his shame, like a coward...Tachibana ran away.

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Learning to Land