Price To Play

PRICE TO PLAY

By Otakugirl and la tensai

“Shut up, baka!” Yuki yells, throwing a cigarette butt on Shuichi’s head.

“Eee? But Yuuuki, I've got a concert in just a few days and I still don't know these dance steps! I've got to practice them so that they suit the song!” Shuichi pouts.

“Shut up shut up shut UP! You think you're under pressure? I’m trying to write my very first male-on-male love scene, thanks to the retarded antics of you and my brother. What the hell am I supposed to write?”

Shuichi blinks in confusion. “Eh?” He walks over to where Yuki's sitting with his laptop. “Male-on-male? How's that supposed to be hard? Just write about what WE do every now and then.” The singer wiggles his eyebrows and sits down on Yuki’s lap. “Ne, Yuki-chaaan?”

Yuki gives Shuichi a sly smile and leans closer to his face. “Now why didn't think of that? Oh, I remember.” He fhes hes in a whisper, “I want it to be *good.*”

Yuki smiles and turns back to his screen. “By the way. That's -sama to you, kid.”

“....” Shuichi is speechless. Then... “EeeEEEEEE!? Yuuukiiiiiii!!” The pink-haired boy clutches Yuki around his neck and sobs and slobbers all over his shirt. “How can you say something like that?! After all we've been through!!! Waaaahhhh!!!”

“Up.” Yuki calmly dumps Shuichi off his lap as he stands. “I have to call Tatsuha-chan. I’ll ask him about his sick fantasies about Ryuichi. Usually I have to stuff a sock in his mouth to not be exposed to such indecency, but for once I think I need it...” He then wanders the room looking for the phone.

Shuichi rubs his butt before speeding off after Yuki. “Meaniiieeee!! Ask me!! I've got fantasies! Really, I do!!” he cries, yanking at Yuki’s $200 shirt.

“Oi! Don't touch the fucking Armani like that!” Yuki complains, shoving Shuichi a safe distance away. “What fantasies?” he smirks. “You mean you still need fantasies with me around? Who are they about?”

“Uuuhm, anoo, etooo...” Shuichi stammers and blushes as Yuki’s eyes pierce into his. “.... Yukiii! I love you!! Let's make up, ne? Ne?” he whines, glomping Yuki.

Yuki manages to pry Shuichi loose and smirks. “No no, that's fine, I’m fascinated to hear about these fantasies of yours,” he says with a slightly mocking tone. “Maybe there will be something in it I can improve and actually use. Shu Shuichi pouts slightly. “Yukiii, are you making fun of me again?”

“Of course not!” Yuki smiles a little. “What, are you embarrassed now? Why were you so eager to tell me about it a minute ago? Were you just trying to get me to pay attention to you?”

Shuichi chews on his lower lip and thinks to himself, *Why'd I have to go and say something like that to him? Shoot! Now he'll think that I'm a total pervert!* “Eh yea yeah, that's right...” He giggles nervously, refusing to meet Yuki’s eyes. He knows that that game'll be over once he does. “Well, I'm off to the studio to practice the dance steps!” The younger boy goes to find his shoes, never mind that it's 11 o' clock in the evening.

Yuki grabs Shuichi's wrist and pulls him back. “You're the worst liar I’ve ever seen.” He tilts his head and smiles almost-sincerely. “Why are you shy all of a sudden? Maybe you just wanted some attention, but I believe you also have some fantasies you'd like to talk about.” He caresses Shuichi’s cheek and nuzzles his cheek with his nose. “You can talk to me, Shuichi.”

Shuichi opens and closes his mouth slightly a couple of times and wets his lips nervously before meeting Yuki’s eyes. *Oh crap...* “W-wel saw saw this magazine once with people in it and, erm, ah heck it was a porno mag!” he says, blushing. “A-and it contained certain... things...”

Yuki smiles slowly. “Come sit down, Shu-chan.” *He's such a sucker for the soft side, but it's nice anyway.* Yuki sits on a small couch at the back of his office and pulls Shuichi to sit next to him. “So what was innocent little Shuichi so entranced by in a porno magazine?”

“You'll only think that I'm a pervert because of this but...” Shuichi squirms a little next to Yuki. “They were using these, things, uh, I don't know what they're called but, they referred to them as ‘toys’ or something...”

Yuki smiles and puts his arm around Shuichi. “What kind of toys? Like vibrators? And no offense, baka, but I think your outfits give that kind of message anyway.”

“Vibr-?!” Shuichi blushes again. “Ighurrrm, yeah maybe, I don't know, I mean...” He blinks suddenly. “My outfits? What about them?”

Yuki just smirks and rests his head on top of Shuichi’s. *Sometimes...it's just easier to let go of the asshole facade...* “Never mind. Well tell me about these toys. What did they look like? What were they doing with them? What were the people like?”

“Uhm, well, there were many different kinds, colors and shapes... the people who, uhm, used them we're tied up sometimes and...” Shuichi suddenly drops his voice to a whisper. “That's what I'd like to try...“ He trails off and bites his index finger nail.

Yuki snuggles closer to Shuichi. “You want to be tied up? Or do you want me to be tied up? Or someone else entirely?”

“E-ee?? You, tied up??” Shuichi giggles nervously and suddenly stops when a mental image hits him. An image of Yuki shivering in his bonds, unable to pleasure himself, looking at Shuichi with eyes wet and begging for more. The pink-haired boy pushes a tissue up his nose. “Ubb, I dubbo?”

“You mean you haven't thought about it? Well, think about it now.” Yuki leans against Shuichi and tousles and kisses the pink hair. “Were you thinking of someone besides me? Can you tell me that much?”

“I-iyah, never!” The younger boy clutches Yuki’s shirt. “It doesn't matter how, really, as long as I'm with you,” he murmurs while he leans into Yuki’s caresses.

Yuki, however, is insistent. He whispers into Shuichi’s ear, “Tell me. Tell me the truth. You fancy yourself a creative person. Don't you want to help me with my book? I’d rather listen to *your* fantasies than my little brother's.”

Shuichi shivers as Yuki’s warm breath caresses his ear gently. “W-well, at first we'd have a nice time, maybe going out to eat or something, and then when we'd get home we'd go to the b-bedroom and...” He stops and swallows quietly.

“And...?” Yuki teases his fingers along the side of Shuichi’s neck. “Then what?”

Shuichi bites his lip and then releases a breath that he'd held for far too long. “Oh I can't say it, not just like that. ...ne, why don't I show you instead?” He looks curiously and almost daringly at Yuki.

The blonde gives Shuichi a fox-like smile. “You do realize you're taking me away from my writing. I hope you're planning on making this something worth writing about. Shall we go to bed, or stay right here?”

*It's now or never...* Shuichi stands up suddenly and looks down at Yuki, trembling with excitement and nervousness. “Bed.” He takes Yuki’s hand and pulls him from the couch towards the bedroom.

Yuki closes the bedroom door and leans against it in a consciously sexy pose as Shuichi wanders around the room. He asks teasingly, “Are you going to tie me up now? Or just attack me with a vibrator?”

Shuichi stands up after rummaging around in a box. “You'll see...” He snaps a stretch of silky cloth held tightly in his fists, then walks over to Yuki with the strip still stretched. “Get on the bed.”

Yuki gives a smile that says 'you're so cute and silly'lothlothes on?” He starts unbuttoning his shirt.

“Oooooh! I want to!” Shuichi puts the cloth between his teeth and unbuttons the rest of Yuki’s shirt. He almost purrs as more and more of Yuki’s chest is revealed.

Yuki chuckles at Shuichi’s eagerness. “And what about you? Should I be returning the favor?” He allows Shuichi to slide his shirt off and let it drop to the floor. “Shit. I gotta hang that up, it's an expensive shirt...”

“Never mind about that!” Shuichi throws the shirt onto a chair. “Come oonnnnn, I wanna try this!” the boy cries, as he has suddenly lost a huge part of his nervousness.

“Okay! It's your idea, so how does this go?”

“Well,” Shuichi begins, before putting his hands around his back and poking the floor with his toe, “In my fantasy you're sort of tied up already...” He looks shyly at Yuki. “Gomen!”

Yuki raises an eyebrow and chuckles. “Well, how do you suppose that's going to happen?” *He can't be serious about this...what the hell would he do once he had...he can't! He doesn't know how to be seme.*

“Oooh, I dunno... maybe I…” Shuichi presses close to Yuki as he murmurs, “Do some of this,” He scratches his nails lightly across Yuki’s nipples. “…Or perhaps this?” He stands on his toes and nips at Yuki’s ear.

Yuki gasps, “No-“ *Dammit not the ear already! Shit...* He grabs Shuichi's chin and forces him to look at him. “I meant, how does one magically end up tied to a bed?” *He's not serious about this...*

The pink-haired terror giggles quietly. “With this of course, silly.” He dangles the silky strip between his fingers in front of Yuki’s face. “And some more of this...” He brushes his finger teasingly along Yuki’s ear.

Yuki feels his eyelids flutter at the tease to his ear. “How is touching my ear going to do anything?” he asks. Total denial.

But Shuichi gets a teasing glint in his eyes. “Why, Yuki, it's your weak point, remember?” He gives Yuki a sudden push, making him end up on the bed. *Perfect...* He jumps onto the bed and lands next to Yuki.

“Where did you ever get that idea?” Yuki continues as though nothing else has happened since the ear discussion. *He is enjoying himself way too much...*

“Aww... come on Yuuukiii, don't be so grumpy.” Shuichi attempts to imitate Yuki’s voice when he says, “I'll make you feel like you're in heaven, baby!” He fails miserably and giggles crazily in disbelief at himself having said such a thing.

“What the hell was *that*??” Yuki huffs. “Come on yourself, what are we doing here? What about this fantasy you wanted to show me?”

“Oh yeah!” Shuichi chirps, as if he just remembered this. He ignores the look of disbelief on Yuki’s face.

“Wellll?” Yuki asks slowly.

Shuichi looks up and points as he screeches, “A cockroach!!!!!” As Yuki turns his head to look at the bug, Shuichi seizes his chance and grabs Yuki's hands and ties them together at the upper part of the bed. “Gotcha!”

Yuki chuckles, “Was it really necessary to try to trick He He shifts around to get more comfortable. He's far too relaxed and confident for Shuichi's taste.

“Nee, Yuki? Are you ok with this?” Shuichi asks carefully. He looks down on his blond lover from where he's straddling him across his stomach, being careful not to actually touch the older man.

Yuki simply smirks. “Sure, why not? So tell me some more about this fantasy of yours.”

Shuichi manages to both pout and scowl at the same time. “It's not working the way it should!” He huffs and crosses his arms. He forgets about Yuki and sits down on him.

“Hn...” Yuki tries to avoid squirming as he feels Shuichi’s ass resting on his stomach. “Well then *make* it work. What's wrong? What were you planning to do once you had me tied up?”

Shuichi loses his pout and narrows his eyes as he almost-glares down at Yuki's form. *He's too co-operative... is he making fun of me?* One of his veins almost pops and he crawls over Yuki and gets close to his face. “Uru... sai...”

*Is he kidding me with this?* “Or you'll do what?” Yuki taunts.

Shuichi forgets his threats and says, “I want to make you feel good.” *It's now or never...* He strokes Yuki's chest with his palm and murmurs, “You're all mine... mine…” He then licks Yuki's lips. The entire time he's been staring intently into Yuki’s eyes. His once baby blue soft eyes now have a shimmer of something else…something different, possessive in them.

Yuki watches Shuichi with half-closed eyes, then slides his tongue out to play with the other boy’s.

Shuichi’s left hand trails random patterns on Yuki’s chest, teasingly passing by the hard nubs, stroking just outside of the pleasurable zone. Yuki leans up slightly to try to kiss Shuichi, who pulls away, just out of reach. *Hmm, tease...* He tries to move his tied arms a little but can't. *Dammit...*

The pink-haired boy leans back fully from Yuki’s face and pushes back the blonde bangs with his hand. “.... I love them.” Yuki gives him a questioning look. “Your eyes, they were what caught me the first time I saw you,” the boy clarifies. Shuichi's face is empty of emotion. He simply stares at Yuki’s form, almost caressing him with his gaze.

*What is he doing?* Yuki wonders. *He's acting...so calm. And...what can I say to that?* Meanwhile, he tries again for a kiss.

This time Shuichi gives in to Yuki’s wish and gives him the night's first kiss, but he continues to look at the older man. As his body heats up, he increases the pressure of his hands on Yuki’s body. “Nhhh”
”

Yuki licks slowly at the boy’s lips as he feels his eyes drift shut. *It's weird looking into his eyes so much...something's different...or maybe I just never noticed it before...*

Shuichi finally stops his teasing movements and grasps the light-brown nipples with his fingertips. He breaks the kiss and leans down to whisper into Yuki’s ear, “I want to hear you... I want you to tell me what you feel...” He then pinches slightly at the stiff nubs.

“Nh...” Yuki bites his lip to stifle any more potential sounds. *Hear me? But...no, I can't...* Yuki turns his head to try to kiss Shuichi's face somewhere, but can't reach.

“Please, don't hold back...” Shuichi murmurs, then licks the edge of Yuki’s ear slowly with the tip of his tongue. “I want to hear it all.…”

“But...it's embarrassing,” Yuki whispers, then bites his lip harder as the tongue is eis ear makes his breath quicken.
“There's no shame, I love you, so tell me if you like what I'm doing to you... “ Shuichi nips at Yuki’s ear before pulling back. He changes his attention to Yuki’s chest and proceeds to torture him sweetly with his mouth as well as his fingers.

Yuki feels his face getting hot. *This is what he wants, isn't it? The whole reason for this...to be the one in control...* He is barely audible when he murmurs, “Mm, Shuichi...” *Shit, I didn't mean to say that...I can't believe he's being so gentle. If I had someone tied up like this I wouldn't be gentle.*

Shuichi shivers slightly at the soft sigh. “You l it? it? Was it this?” He rubs his thumb against Yuki’s nipples. “Or this?” Then he pinches them slightly. “Or maybe this?” he asks before he licks and nips at them.

Yuki sucks in a sharp breath as Shuichi licks his nipples. “Nnh...” *God, something about the way he uses his mouth always amazes me...* “Do that...more...” *Shut UP baka! What the hell has gotten into me??* he scolds himself.

Shuichi feels his crotch tighten. *Ahn, yesss...* “You like this?” He licks the hard nubs in rough swipes before flicking his tongue over them and rubbing them harder with his thumbs.

“Nnh...yes...” Yuki says softly. He wiggles his hips a bit, as if that will relieve the tightness of his jeans. “Mmf...” He turns his head to the side in order to stop watching Shuichi...seeing his soft mouth at work is making him dizzy.

Shuichi sighs softly as he senses Yuki’s discomfort. He reaches beneath himself with one hand and strokes the heat he feels through the denim.

“Mmh! S-...” Yuki squeezes his eyes shut and feels his back arch slightly. Sh-...” He pulls reflexively at the cloth tying his arms, causing his arms and chest to flex.

The pink-haired boy gasps as Yuki’s muscles come to life. His blonde lover is by no means buff, but still has but has enough to him to make him...*...delectable and...* “...Delicious even...” he mumbles to himself as he places soft kisses across Yuki’s chest before moving downwards. His left hand, previously busy fondling Yuki’s dick, stops and unbuttons his pants.

“What'd you say?” Yuki whispers. He tries to control his breathing and feels his stomach muscles clench as Shuichi starts opening his pants*

“Did you know that? When your body tightens just so, you're absolutely irresistible...” Shuichi trails one finger slowly down Yuki’s slight six-pack before joining the other hand, finally managing to release Yuki from his cloth-prison.
Yuki flushes slightly at Shuichi’s words...the boy is not usually this specific in his praise of his lover. “S-so...” Yuki suddenly starts feeling nervous for the first time since this started. “What...um...what happens next in your fantasy?”

“Hm? Oh, we screw our brains out.” Shuichi smiles lightly, as if they weren't discussing anything more important than the weather.

The older man raises his eyebrows. *Funny, that doesn't make me feel any better...* “Um...o-okay...but...”

“Lift your hips a little, ok?” Shuichi pulls Yuki’s pants off completely together with his underwear. *Hmm, now, this is more like it...* He puts his hands on Yuki’s bent knees and spreads his legs slightly. Without realizing it he licks his lips at the sight in front of him: Yuki, naked, hard and incapable of dealing with it himself...

Yuki feels his breathing speed up again, but this time it's at least partly due to fear and feelings of helplessness. He whispers, “Shuichi...I...” *I want him, but...but...this is too...why should I be scared of HIM? But...*

“Hush... I told you, I want you to feel good. I'll do anything you want me to, all you have to do is ask...” Shuichi strokes the tops of Yuki’s legs from where he kneels between his feet.

“You'll do anything *I* want? Isn't that kind of...against the point of having me tied up and helpless?”

“Oh... I don't know if I made it clear to you... you'll have to tell me if you like it, or else I'll stop... so, what do you want?” Shuichi kisses the inside of Yuki’s leg at the knee.

“Nh, that kind of tickles...um...what do I want?” Yuki gives his lover a blank look. I-I-I”...well this was *your* fantasy, ne?” *Dammit, why do I feel so nervous? He said he wants to screw, but not who would be screwing whom...*

Shuichi’s eyes become wobbly at the prospect of Yuki giving him the reigns. “Yukiii, you're so nice to mee!” He rubs his head against Yuki’s leg joyfully. “Very well, here I go~!” He pushes Yuki’s legs apart more and places a trail of kisses and licks along his thigh, slower and slower until he's almost where Yuki wants his tongue to be the most. Then he stops.

“Mmmmhhh...Shuichi, please don't stop...” Yuki flushes deeply and closes his eyes at his own words. *Dammit, since when am I this weak?* He whispers, “Don't...don't stop.…”

“Nani? What do you want? This?” Shuichi asks before licking lightly along the thick rod. “Or..?” He then blows along the path he just licked.

“Ahh...l-lick...” Yuki lifts his hips and pulls at the cloth around his hands again. “Mmm, dammit Shuichi...”

“Lick, ok...” The boy laps lightly at the quivering member, not satisfying even an ounce of Yuki’s need, just adding more to it like pouring gasoline onto a fire. “Like that?”

“Y-yes...more...” Yuki is feeling much less nervous, as the fear has mostly been replaced by sexual tension and frustration. Shuichi finally gives into Yuki’s need and wraps his moist lips around the head and begins the familiar up and down-motion. “Mmh...ah yes, Shu-chan, you're so good with your mouth...” he moans as he arches his back and tilts his head back. *Dammit, I wish I could touch him...*

Yuki spreads his legs more, lifting the knee of one leg and putting his foot flat on the bed, and letting his other leg fall flat against the mattress. As he continues his ministrations on Yuki’s manhood, Shuichi takes the soft pouch beneath it into his palm and starts kneading carefully.

“Uhn...ne, Shu...since we're...ah-ahhh....doing this bondage thing...m-maybe you should...hurt me somehow? Just a little...” *Hel-LO, isn't that what you're worried about?* Yuki berates himself mentally. Part of his mind just wants to ask this so that Shuichi will assure him that he *won't* hurt him. But part of him is rather curious about how the younger boy always enjoys the rough stuff.

“...” After a moment, Shuichi releases Yuki from his mouth. “Whatever you say, Yuki...” The blonde catches a slight glimpse of a wicked smile on Shuichi's lips before his length is engulfed in heat once more. This time he can feel Shuichi's teeth more as they scrape along his sensitive member. “Mmhh...” The younger boy drives his nails slightly into Yuki’s legs, holding him in place.

“Shit.” Yuki’s eyes go wide. He's a bit surprised that Shuichi went for it so fast. *Shit shit shit...* “Mh-hhhhmmmmhhh....” Yuki whimpers as he feels Shuichi’s teeth and tries not to move. He's scared and aroused at the same time.

Shuichi looks up along Yuki’s body, trying to glimpse his face to see a reaction. *Do you like it or not? Which is it, Yuki?* He puts a hand around the blonde's manhood and sticks two fingers into his mouth along with Yuki’s erection, wetting them simultaneously.

“Mmmmhh...Shu...I need....more....just...I d-don't know, more...something...uunnhh...” Yuki looks down at the other boy, giving up on hiding for the moment. His face is flushed, his eyes frustrated.
Shuichi lets Yuki slip out of his mouth and looks up at him, eyes half-lidded. “Something... like this?” He presses one finger against Yuki’s opening, teasing but not going in.

Yuki sort of panics. “W-wait! Wait...isn't that going to hurt? You need some lube or something...”

“You sure? I thought you wanted it more...rough, so to speak. But okay...” Shuichi reaches for the tube of lube they always keep in the drawer next to the bed. He squirts some of the clear stuff onto his fingers and then returns to what he was doing. “Sorry if it's a bit cold...”

“I-I just...if we're going to do it *this* way, I don't want it to be *brutal*...I...”
*I'm scared...does he feel this way normally? When he's the uke? Does it make him nervous and scared of pain?*

Shuichi pauses in his actions and notices that Yuki is actually shivering slightly. He feels terribly guilty over the fact that he didn't pay more attention to his lover's state of distress. “Ah! G-gomen Yuki, I didn't mean to be so cruel... I'll be careful, I promise! ...Or, don't you want it, this way?”

“I...I should let you, shouldn't I? It's only fair. I do want it...I think. Just...” Yuki pauses and then finishes weakly, “Tell me it'll be good? It'll be okay, right?”

“I don't care if it's fair or not, I'll only do it if you really want me to... just, tell me if you hate it, ok?” Shuichi pushes one finger halfway in. “How do you feel? Yuki...”

“Um...feels okay...” *Actually it stings a little...I need to relax.* “Mmhh...” He pulls at his arms again, then closes his eyes and tries to will himself to relax.

“That's it... I promised I'd make you feel good...” Shuichi murmurs. He leans down and captures Yuki’s length with his mouth again, distracting Yuki from the discomfort of being penetrated.

“Mmh, ok, more...ahh...”

Encouraged, Shuichi pushes his finger all the way in as he simultaneously takes in more of Yuki's hot shaft into his mouth. “Mmh...”

“Uuuhhnn!” Yuki arches his back and groans with both pleasure and pain. “Mmhh...” He lets his head roll to the side as he whimpers with the intense sensations.

Shuichi presses his tongue against the underside of Yuki's cock, massaging it with slow, rough motions. *Good god, the sounds he makes... they make me want...* ressresses a second finger inside of Yuki, carefully stretching him.

“Ahh!” Yuki’s whole body jerks with the somehow unexpected entry. *I don't think I'm ready for this...* “Shit...” *I can't DO anything...*

Shuichi notices how Yuki's thighs tense and slows the motions of his fingers. *Crap, I went too fast.* He lowers his head and takes as much of Yuki into his mouth as he can, trying to relax his lover.

*I kind of want him to talk to me...his voice is always...well, I don't know...* “S-Shuichi,” Yuki says quietly. “C-come here...”

The pink-haired boy blinks in surprise and releases Yuki from his soft mouth. Nanda, Yuki?”

The older man closes his eyes and says softly, “Can you...um...can you kind of...move up here? Y-you don't have to move your hand or anything...” He feels his face flushing as he asks this.

Shuichi smiles softly and moves up along Yuki's body. He breathes softly into Yuki’s ear, “Ne, you doing okay? Does it hurt?”

Yuki shivers at hearing Shuichi's voice. “I-I'm okay. It hurts a little. I just...I’m trying to relax, ne?” He sighs and bites his lip in embarrassment.

“Nnn, good. You know what you look like right now? You're so fucking hot that I feel like I'm burning just from looking at you...” Shuichi says, then licks Yuki’s neck teasingly, just away from his ear.

“Mmmhhh...what's so hot about me?” *I always hear that...but I think Shuichi means something different than everyone else does when he says that...*

Shuichi smirks slightly. “Well, where to start? You look awesome all the time, but now that I have you writhing beneath me, all hot and bothered... makes me want to…” He pauto fto flick his tongue against the edge of Yuki’s ear, causing the blonde to gasp, before continuing, “... eat you...”

“Ahh....y-yeah...” Yuki tilts his head so that Shuichi has better access to his ear.
Shuichi then takes Yuki’s earlobe between his teeth and tugs at it.

“Mmmmhhh... you like this?” He moves his fingers carefully inside Yuki, testing the waters.

“Y-yes...more...” Shuichi laps all over Yuki’s ear, making him writhe in pleasure as his weak spot is tormented over and over again. “Ahh! Ohh...god...” Yuki can't help but let it all out as his ultimate pleasure is given. “Uunnhh...”

Shuichi feels his crotch tighten as Yuki’s breathy gasps seem to echo in his head. *Ah, shit...*

“Ah, god...y-yes...” Yuki turns his head toward the younger boy. “You're good at that, baby...” he murmurs before he presses his lips against Shuichi's.

Shuichi kisses Yuki passionately, trying to keep control of himself. “Mmh, you're so sexy, Yuki...” He makes scissoring motions with his fingers inside Yuki and finds him to be relaxed. “Ne, you ready?” he asks, then licks Yuki’s lips. “You feel all right?”

“Uuuhhh...yes...” Yuki moans, then bites Shuichi’s lower lip. “Yes...” He shoves his tongue in Shuichi’s mouth.

“Mmmh...” Shuichi kisses Yuki back heatedly and takes his fingers out of him to get rid of his pants. Once they're out of the way he ends the kiss and whispers, “Tell me if it hurts too much,” and presses the head of his erection against Yuki’s opening.

“Mh, okay...” Yuki squeezes his eyes shut and clenches his fists. “Go.” Shuichi makes a small thrust with his hips, making the tip of his cock sink into Yuki. “Ahh...” Yuki grits his teeth together for a moment. “Shit...do it faster, Shuichi...”

“U-uhn...” The boy is a little nervous, as this is a first for both of them. He releases a breath he'd been holding and thrusts halfway inside. “Aahhnnn!!! Oh gods..!!”
“AHH! Oh shit...Shuichi...” Yuki pants with his mouth open. “W-wait a second...” He takes time to try to catcs brs breath. “Ah...” He wiggles his hips a bit in an effort to somehow make things more comfortable or fit better.

“A-ah.. I'm sorry Yuki... uhn...” Shuichi responds. He tries desperately to stay still. “D-does it hurt?”

“I-I don't know...but...keep going.”

Shuichi nods shakily. *Crap, he looks like he's in pain… wait, what is it that Yuki always does?? Oh yeah!* He reaches one hand to Yuki’s chest and rubs the hard nubs there. *A-and then he'd...* He reaches downYukiYuki’s hardness, stroking it in time to his slow, shallow thrusts, taking him slightly deeper each time.

“Nnnh....” Yuki opens his eyes and gives Shuichi a pleading, somewhat painful look. “K-keep talking to me...”

“Nnh, you're so good Yuki.. ah, I'm in you, I can feel you from here... you're so good…nnnnhhh…” Shuichi moans. He then begins to thrust slightly faster into Yuki.

“Uuuuhhhhhhnnnnn...god Shuichi, I love your voice...” *Damn, I was never to reveal that! Oh well.*

“Haah!! Mmh, you're so tight, Yuki.. I feel like you're swallowing me whole!” *Ah, I'm babbling! Nnh, he's so good...* Shuichi grabs Yuki’s leg with one hand and continues to stroke his dick with the other.

“Nnh, ah god Shu, it feels...so...uhh, so full...you feel huge...ah don't stop talking!”

“Aahhnn, Y-Yuki!!” Shuichi feels the edge coming close. “A-aaah, you're so good.. NNNnnnhhh!!! Yuki, I'm think I'm going to.. ah!” *I've got to…hold on, I want to come together with him!!* With this thought in mind, Shuichi strokes Yuki faster and thrusts deeper.

“Ahhh! Ahh...oh...god...” Yuki reflexively pulls hard against the cloth still tying his arms and arches his back. “Harder! Y-you know you're not supposed to come before me!” He giggles for a moment. “Uhhnnn....oh Shuichi...fuck...”

“A-ahn! Hai!” Shuichi grabs Yuki’s leg harder for leverage and aims his thrusts to hit Yuki’s sweet spot as often as possible. “Mmmmhhh!”

“AHH! OH SHIT! Wh-what the hell...OH GOD! FUCK!!!” Yuki’s whole body jerks as he screams at the ceiling and spurts into Shuichi’s hand. “Mmhhh....god...oh god...” He keeps whimpering as he almost painfully spasms in Shuichi’s hand and feels his whole body starting to shake.

Shuichi sees Yuki’s face overtaken by bliss as he comes. Then, as Yuki’s inner muscles clench on him, his entire world is collected in his nether regions as he releases his control aneasueasure overtakes him. “A-AAAHHHNN!!! OH GOD!!!!!”

Yuki looks up at Shuichi to see a look on his face that he has never seen before. It's a look of pure pleasure, minus the usual pain, and he feels a pang in his heart.

“Nnnnnhhh... Y-Yuki....” the pink-haired boy gasps. His limbs begin to shake as they're hit with the pleasant force of the afterglow. He manages to steady himself with his right arm and looks up to meet Yuki’s gaze. He smiles lovingly at the older man. “Y-Yuki... “ he whispers.

Yuki is silent for some moments. Then: “...I’m sorry.”

“Nh?” Shuichi looks confused. “For what? Did I do something wrong?”

“What would I say that for if YOU did something?” Yuki responds, then looks away. “I...I don't know. For hurting you. For never putting that look on your face before.” He'd calmed down from his orgasm but now feels himself starting to shiver again for entirely different reasons. *I’m...still so helpless. naked, tied up, and he's still pinning me down from the inside...oh god...now what?*

“Ah...” Shuichi blushes a little. “, I , I like the other stuff we do too...” He giggles slightly. “Of course, this was really awesome. Nnhh...” He grunts slightly as he pulls out from Yuki. He reaches over to the bedside table for some Kleenexes and wipes them both clean. “Does it hurt a lot?” Shuichi asks, patting the side of Yuki’s butt.

Yuki closes his eyes. *Dammit...stop shaking.* “I don't know. Sort of.” He shifts slightly and gasps. “Nh...ow.”

“Eheh, gomen. Don't worry, it'll pass....” Shuichi glomps Yuki around his stomach. “Thank you Yuki! You were great! No, better than great, you were awesome! I love you sooo much!” he cries while he places smooches all over the blonde’s stomach.

*He's still so oblivious...* “Yeah, sure, thanks. Can you fucking untie me now?” Yuki feels a compulsion to reestablish the balance of power by being mean to his young lover again.

“Aww... already?” Shuichi giggles at the glare he receives from Yuki. “Hai hai.” He crawls across Yuki and unties him. “There. Better?”

“Hn.” Yuki rolls over onto his side, away from Shuichi. He would get up and leave if he could but is worried that it'd hurt too much.

Shuichi lies down next to Yuki and puts his arm around his back. “Ai shiteruze, Yuki... arigatou.” He kisses Yuki on his neck.

Yuki rubs one of his reddened wrists and then suddenly presses a hand ast hst his eyes. *Dammit...*

Shuichi feels Yuki tense. “Mm? What's wrong?”

*Fuck, fuck, fuck...* “Nothing.” Yuki fights back tears that he doesn't understand. *It hurts...my body..and...why is he...* “Why are you still here?” Yuki demands, not moving from his position. “Aren't you done with me?” He has a sudden mental image of the real Yuki.

“Y-Yuki? Shouldn't I? Ne, tell me what's wrong? Honey...” Shuichi sits up and looks across Yuki’s shoulder. *He's crying! Oh no, what did I do? What DO I do?* “Yuki...” he coaxes, putting a hand on his shoulder.

“Don't fucking call me that!” Yuki sits up quickly and shoves Shuichi away. Shuichi gasps as he gets the air knocked out of him slightly. “Don't you ever call me that. Not if you don't want to be like *him.*”

“Y-, ah, Eiri... gomen nasai. I wasn't thinking...” Shuichi looks pleadingly at his blonde lover.

“Not THAT, dumb-ass,” Yuki sneers. “Don't fucking call me ‘honey.’” He stands up and starts pulling his pants on. “I’m no one's 'honey,' you understand that? I LET you do this. You don't have control over me, you hear me? I’m not a little kid anymore. I can take care of myself. I’m not a little boy and I’m not your *honey* and you can't fucking hurt me!” He pauses, then mutters, “No one's gonna hurt me ever again.”

Shuichi bites his lip for a moment, then cries, “Ah, I'm sorry, I went too far!! I know that you're not anyone's anything! Please...” The tears that gathered in his eyes are starting to fall down his cheeks. He whispers, “Gomen nasai, ne? Please forgive me... I love you...”

“And I suppose that means you'd never ever want to hurt me, ne?” Yuki snaps. He feels fuzzy, his mind seems stuck in a different time, with a different person.

“Look at me!” Shuichi yells as he slams his fist on the bed. “Please look at me... I could never hurt you... you're my all, I love you so much...”

Yuki runs a shaking hand through his hair. “You think you're the first person to tell me that? But they all do it! They all try to take advantage of me and hurt me and so I HAVE to hurt them first! I have to!” He wipes angrily at the tears streaming down his face before he finally turns to look at Shuichi, who sighs in relief through his tears. “Why do you take it? Doesn't the way I treat you make you want to hurt me, or to leave?”

“Never... I'll never leave you…I love you... I... “ Shuichi insists as he crawls closer and hugs Yuki. “I'll always be by your side... no matter what!”

Yuki tries to resist the urge to bury his face in Shuichi’s soft hair. “Why? Why? Why won't you just STOP? I’m horrible...don't you believe that I killed someone? I did, I did it because he made me this awful damaged person that I am....”

“Everything that you've done... everything that you are... I love. You are my world, I'll always love you, with all of my soul,” Shuichi tells him, then allows himself to cry quietly against Yuki.

Yuki gives in and presses his face against Shuichi’s hair and sobs. “God, maybe you're as sick as I am.” He giggles somewhat hysterically. “I realize I can't get rid of you...and...this was good while it was going on. Maybe I just wanted some kind of punishment. But...ne, I don't think I can handle it again. Not for awhile anyway.”

“Oh Eiri! It doesn't matter! I love you! I don't care if people call us crazy, I can't live without you!” Shuichi tries desperately to stop crying. Soon his sobs begin to fade out and he remains holding a shivering Yuki in his arms.

“I wish I could understand why you feel that way. I spend most of my time just trying *not* to feel. At all. You know, people say you have to love yourself before anyone else can love you. So how can you love me that way? I just can't seem to trust people. But I try, ne? I try, Shuichi, really...”

Shuichi still holds Yuki close to him. “I know you do. And I love you for it. I love you for everything you do, I can't explain why or how....” He looks at Yuki and smiles shakily. “...I just do... it's the power you have over me, love.” He gently kisses Yuki’s cheek.

Yuki sighs and wraps his arms around Shuichi. “I just hope you're as patient as you think you are. There's only so much snogging on television I can deal with at once.”

Shuichi giggles quietly. “You wont get rid of me that easy, and even if you left me I'd come right after you like a squirrel on crack.”

“I think you ARE on crack. Dammit. I still haven't written a damn thing today.”

“Hehe, but I've given you lots of inspiration, ne?”

“Pfft, I don't know if I care to relive that,” Yuki sighs. “But...maybe the protagonist of my story should see what it's like to let someone peek into the ugly, nasty abyss of his soul,” he chuckles.

“It's not ugly at all!” Shuichi whines. “It just reeks of smoke from your cigarettes is all!”

“Hn, whatever you say. I've decided my ass hurts too much to sit on it in front of the computer, so I’m taking a nap.” Yuki crawls back into bed and snuggles under the covers.

“Well, I'm feeling kinda sleepy too...” Shuichi jumps onto Yuki. “Waaiii! G'night Yuki!”

Yuki pushes Shuichi off, albeit gently, and then allows the pink-haired boy to snuggle up next to him. “Shut up and go to sleep.”


*THE END!*