Beauty and Disclosure

\"Beauty and Disclosure
A Prince of Tennis fic by Lunamaria
Pairing: Tezuka/Fuji slash.
Disclaimer: Not mine. Konomi\'s.


\"Even through the darkest phase
Be it thick or thin
Always someone marches brave
Here beneath my skin

Constant craving
Has always been...\"

-- From KD Lang\'s \"Constant Craving\".


****

He’s lying underneath you, his skin pressed against yours, lips open and dry as he moans your name pleadingly, pleasure almost blinding you as he touches and holds you feverishly.

But oh no, you’re not giving in that easily.

Having sex, making love, whatever – he’s usually the one who directs it. He settles the rhythm as soon as you allow him access to your body, directs where or what his hands touch, and tries to playfully break all your taboos and do you as quickly as possible, always murmuring in your ear how beautifully vulnerable you can be in bed, in contrast to your mask of self-control and tranquility.

That’s a weakness, and you know it. You don’t exactly like to be vulnerable or weak. You’re someone used to have people relying on you, trusting you… but sometimes, this young man with blue eyes and light brown hair makes you feel frail, because you know that he’s the type of person who can destroy someone else with such little things like gestures, smiles, or his mere presence.

Your body placed over his own and between his legs, you’re trying to suppress your own physical urges telling you to go faster. Your body tingles with pleasure, but you control it. And damn, it’s hard – specially when your lover is the one you met when you were twelve, fell in love with when you were sixteen, and live with since you both started college. Someone who has been with you for years.

And right in this moment, he’s pulling you in a deep kiss, his tongue dancing with yours and his arms wrapped around your back. His whole self is wordlessly telling you, almost begging you in its body language: “Faster, Tezuka… faster”.

But you want this to last longer, and hold on your sanity. The caresses and kisses continue, and that’s all that you’ll give him now. Patience, Fuji, don’t push me, you think…

“Faster, Tezuka…”, he murmurs when you let go of the kiss. Bingo.

“Not now…”, you whisper back and start nibbling on his earlobe, lightly teasing it with your teeth. Fuji moans and bites his lip, frustrated, but he doesn’t protest too loudly since, despite refusing to take him and fuck him as hard as he wants, you still try to keep his inner flame burning through your teasing…

“Be patient, Fuji…”.

After you trail slow and light kisses down his collarbone, you take Fuji’s nipple in your mouth and suck lightly. As expected, he almost screams, but tries to restrain his cries of pleasure by biting his lower lip. You think it’s time to give in a little, so this time you kind of comply and suck a little more, also teasing the nub with your tongue. And he loves such a treatment; that’s what his fast breaths, really loud moans, and how his body squirms under yours, tell you.

Fuji still wants to push your buttons, though, so almost immediately after you stop sucking his nipple… you feel his hand slipping in between your bodies and taking a hold of a certain part of you. And it takes almost all of your self-control not to scream as his fingers wrap around your cock, trying to force you to play his game and go as fast, hard, and passionate as he wants you to.

But you resist. In other times, you would’ve cried out, but you desperately hold on what’s left of your sanity at this point. No, you’re not completely giving in. No, you’re not the God he can pray to, to have his way…

His hand is now starting to move. Fast. Fuji wants you to scream, but you hold back your urges to do so, and all that comes from your mouth is a dry, hoarse grunt.

“Please stop…”, you murmur. “You’re not helping…”.

Fuji’s fingers stop jerking you off, but he keeps the hand there.

“Helping you to do what…?”, he starts. Through half-closed lids, his blue irises are fixed on your face.

But you’re at a loss of words. How can you tell him that you don’t want to be vulnerable again in this field?

Fuji sighs and he removes his hand from your crotch. He’s frustrated, you see, and most likely he thinks you’re pushing him away again - and you know how much he hates that.

Yes, that’s most likely what you’re doing. Stop denying that. You’ve never been someone up to self-disclosure; you know that so damn well.

You lean down and kiss him softly on the lips. He could easily refuse this, but he doesn’t, and kisses you back slowly.

“I suppose I can’t always have it my way…”, he sighs when the kiss is over. You think he’s most likely disappointed, but then he smiles and laughs a little.

He pulls you closer to him, and whispers in your ear: “So, kill me softly, Tezuka, and you better do it damn well”.

“Be sure I will”, you say. You then sit up on the bed and grab the tube of lube that’s in your bedside drawer, open it, and coat your fingers with its contents. You lean over Fuji and kiss him deeply; meanwhile, your hand goes down, slowly, and reaches between his parted legs…

Fuji’s inner muscles tense when one of your gel-covered fingers slips in, but he doesn’t do anything in protest. You *did* promise to “kill” him softly, though, so you don’t take any unnecessary hurries and start stretching him very slowly, adding another finger, and deliberately trying not to reach for a certain inner spot… yet.

When you consider that he’s stretched enough, you take your fingers out, and get ready to use the lube on yourself. But he grabs your wrist, sits up and smiles at you kinda mischievously. Getting the message, you give him the tube; he puts some gel on his fingertips, and soon the hand applying the lube on your manhood is the one belonging to him, carefully, teasingly, *still* trying to push your control buttons but doing it in a much more subtle way…

Some seconds later, you’re again on top of him, and now he’s lifting his legs to let you go on, and with your hands on his hips you carefully start pushing your manhood past his entrance. There you have it, you two are now making love in a slow motion; no hurries, no pressure, not him trying to make you come faster than the last time… and no one trying to over-power each other when dancing this horizontal dance. It comes from the heart, the desire, and something else that you can’t exactly give a name to. Not that you care right now, anyway.

The pace is settled, the cards are thrown. And his arms are around you again as he holds on to you; you do the same, closing your eyes and pulling him towards you without any reservations as you repeteadly and quickly thrust into him, the rhythm now faster and faster as the lust increases, the moans of you both are louder, and you’re getting closer to orgasm…

But the rough, fast tempo has to subdue. After you come with a loud moan, your body moves slower, and you open your eyes. You can see his face clearly: his cheeks are flushed, his lips murmur something you can’t hear, and his blue eyes are still closed…

You lift your hips to slip out of Fuji, then let him hold you lazily to his chest. None of you speak for several minutes; just don’t feel like doing so, since all was said in actions already…

“...Kunimitsu, you’re not asleep, are you? My leg is numb and I’m still sore…”.

You lift your face from his shoulder and blink. Seems the usual Fuji is back, since despite the kinda whiny sound of his voice, he’s smiling.

“A good kind of sore, it seems”.

You can barely believe you’re saying such a thing. That’s something *Kikumaru* or *Saeki* would tell Fuji, for Gods’ sake!

He laughs out loud and places a playful kiss on your lips. “I’m starting to get to you again. Good”.

You don’t reply, just smirk a little as you kiss him one last time, to then get up from bed and pick up your clothes from the chair you placed them on before this all started. Fuji does the same (except that his own clothes are sprawled on the floor), and when you’re done he grabs you by the hand to drag you to the bathroom…

You’re not a perfect couple, and never will be. Your rhythm of life isn’t always the same, with him being so unpredictable and you still preferring order…

But you’re understanding each other a little better, every day... And in a sense, that’s what counts.