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Last Christmas	By : Iapetus Category: Gensomaden Saiyuki > General Views: 2294 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Gensomaden Saiyuki, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Last Christmas
- 1
‘Last’ Christmas

A Saiyuki fan fiction by
Iapetus

Disclaimer: I do not own Saiyuki.

Note: I wrote this a year ago,
but never did get around to posting the smut version here on aff.net. So here it is. I hope you enjoy.

-*-*-

Freezing.
There was no other way to describe it. Despite how he tried, nothing Sanzo
seemed to have done to the thermostat had worked. He had even gone down to the
landlord to complain, but in the end, it had amounted to nothing. Apparently he
was out trying to buy some last minute Christmas presents.

It wasn’t the first time that December, or even today for that matter, that the
blond had cursed the holiday season. Christmas rarely brought him good things.
Long hours at work, despite giving him a chance to earn more money, were not always
welcome. Sighing, he walked over and turned on the radio.

“…we have just received word that the subway has resumed its regular routes.
The winds have been causing power outages in various small sections of the
area-”

In disgust, Sanzo turned the radio off and walked into the kitchen. Glancing at
his watch for what had to be the twelfth time in a half hour; he finally took
it off and set it on the windowsill above the sink.

He’s late again, Sanzo thought, not in the least bit surprised. He
could have at least called for a taxi or something if the subways were down…
After all, wasn’t it him who made such a big deal about Christmas? Sanzo
had even taken Christmas Eve off, at his instance, since he wanted them to
spend the holidays together.

Goku had always been like that. He hated to spend the holidays alone – or see
one of his friends do so. But it was he who was called in at the last minute,
running their plans. Not that Sanzo had been looking forward to it, mind you.
He tried to keep reminding himself of that.

-*-*-

The door slammed behind him, and Goku took a moment to catch his breath before
he threw down the mail and took off his coat. “I’m home!” he called out, his
eyes focused on the light coming from the kitchen. Throwing his coat
haphazardly against one of the hooks on the wall, he watched as more snow fell
to the floor. It must just be snowing everywhere, he noted with a small
smile and a shiver. He was still cold from outside.

Forgetting to take of his snowy tennis shoes, Goku grabbed the mail and rushed
towards the kitchen at high speed. He stopped abruptly, though, when he passed
the tiny Christmas tree. It was sparely decorated, but a single strand of
lights wound itself around it. Except that the lights weren’t on.

Bending over, he quickly plugged them in, and paused to look at it briefly
before wandering into the kitchen. For a moment he mentally debated on grabbing
another candy cane to eat from the branches. It would be nice to get some more,
but he doubted Sanzo would, especially with their tight budget, and especially
since he had eaten the ones that had gone missing.

Well, he would try. Maybe Sanzo was feeling benevolent for once. Miracles have
been known to happen.

Walking into the kitchen, the first and foremost thing he noticed was that
Sanzo was standing at the sink. Washing dishes to be more specific. He felt a
twang of guilt when he remembered it was his turn to do the dishes.

Sanzo didn’t seem to notice his entrance, or if he did he ignored it. Setting
the mail down on the kitchen table, Goku’s hand was finally free, and he walked
up behind the blond and wrapped his arms around his the
older man’s waist.

“I’m home, Sanzo,” he repeated, a bit more quietly. The blond flinched slightly
as he drew his chest flush against his roommate’s back, waiting for him to
adjust to his close proximity.

For a moment the dish washing was brought to a pause, and Goku could feel the
tension in the man’s frame start to seep out of him. It wasn’t sudden –
incredibly gradual, in fact – and if it hadn’t been for the fact that Goku had
known Sanzo for so long, he would have not noticed it.

“You’re late.”

Goku shifted on his feet and pulled Sanzo closer. “You’re supposed to say
‘Welcome back’…”

“…and you’re supposed to be on time,” he challenged.

“You never say that even when I do.”

The man simply scoffed at this, and started to rinse some of the dishes when
they both heard a familiar rumble. Goku could see Sanzo raise a single eyebrow
in the reflection on the window.

“…hungry…” he complained. Relaxing his hold, the brunet brought one hand to his
stomach, as if to hold it in place.

“You know where we keep the food,” Sanzo said simply as he put a few dishes
into the drying rack. “Get it yourself.”

Rather reluctantly, Goku moved away from his roommate and headed over to their
fridge. “Have you eaten yet?” he inquired, scowling at the sight of cold and
empty metal shelves.

“It’s 10:30,”
the blond replied without turning.

Goku hated when he answered like that, like some sort of politician. “And?”

“Do you think I’ve eaten?” More dishes were rinsed off. The pile was
getting smaller and smaller.

He had a point. Even if he was not great lover of food, Sanzo wasn’t the kind
of person to wait for someone to have a meal. If he was hungry, then he’d eat.
“Yes.”

“Then why did you ask?”

Goku started for the pantry, but stopped again. “I was looking forward to
eating dinner with you.”

“You’re just saying that because you missed dinner again. And here I thought
that you just wanted a snack…”

“No, I really did!” And it wasn’t his fault that he missed dinner. Well,
ok, it had been, but it was for a very important reason. If he had his way he’d
have snack breaks all the time, but because of his work schedule, he
technically was not allowed to take meal breaks. With the Christmas rush, most
of the time those breaks had been taken away from him.

But today it hadn’t been. He had been out looking for something important. That
wasn’t the point, though. He had wanted to spend the whole day with
Sanzo, not just the evening. He regretted yet again checking the box on the
application that said he was on call at all times.

Goku saw Sanzo give one look at the towel by the dish rack and seem to turn
away in revulsion. Well, they could always drip-dry, and Goku wasn’t going to
complain about that. Turning his attention back to the pantry, he continued his
search for something edible.

A decisive click of a lighter preceded the familiar smell of tobacco, and Goku
debated on whether or not he should bring up the argument about how they’d have
more food if he could just quit. But Sanzo was not ready to trade one of his
vices to fuel one of Goku’s. And even though he would really like more food, he
wasn’t starving to death or anything, even if that’s what it sometimes felt like.

“If you wanted to eat dinner with me,” Sanzo said finally, after a long pause,
“then you shouldn’t have gotten home late.”

Goku turned around to look at him again. The man was calmly leaning against the
counter, cigarette in hand. Sanzo seemed to observe him for a whole minute
before walking over to Goku and gently pushing him aside. Rummaging around, he
withdrew a package of ramen, and then headed over to the stove.

“…what are you doing?”

Sanzo appeared to get the expression on his face that always appeared when Goku
asked a question with a very obvious answer. “I’m making us something to eat.”

“Us?”

“I never said I ate dinner.”

Goku smiled slightly. It’d be the closest he’d ever get to Sanzo telling him
that he was waiting for him. The man had never been direct with these sorts of
things. Making his way back to the table, Goku sat down and started to leaf
through the mail. It soon started to form three piles, and he murmured to
himself as he sorted. “Bill, bill, Christmas card, bill, junk mail, Christmas
card, Christmas card, bill, Christmas card…”

He saw Sanzo’s face wrinkle in abhorrence at the pile of bills, but picked them
up nevertheless. Goku didn’t even ask if Sanzo wanted to open any of the cards,
and picked up the green envelope at the top of the sorted pile. Glancing at the
address, he saw that it was from their former suitemates from when they lived
in the dorms. It was immediately obvious who picked it out, and it was also
obvious who grabbed the card at the last second to leave a comment. Amused and
lightly aggravated that he couldn’t retort to said
comment immediately, he handed the card to Sanzo.

“…damn cockroach. How the hell did Hakkai even mail this with
him saying that?”

“Because he has a weird sense of humor?” Goku suggested. The second
envelope was red, and its contents didn’t get a rise out of him like the last
one did. He grinned as he set it down on the table and looked up at Sanzo.
“Lirin left a comment for you too.”

The blond looked at the card and shook his head. “No, we aren’t going to the
DDR tournament. She knows that we already aren’t.”

“But Sanzo…” Goku whined, “I promised Kougaiji a rematch…”

“She’s better than the both of you,” he pointed out. “What’s the point?”

“He’s my rival!” Goku explained like it was the most obvious thing in the
world. “That’s the point!”

“You look ridiculous when you do it.”

“So? It’s fun!” he exclaimed.
“C’mon Sanzo, it’s not like it’s going to cost me any money or anything, you
know I can get in for free…”

“No.” The blond shook his head as he continued to go through the pile of bills,
seemingly waiting for Goku to complain again.

-*-*-

A half a minute passed before he realized that something was wrong. Looking up,
he saw that Goku had a plain-looking envelope in his hands – it must have stuck
to the back of one of the cards in the sorting. It didn’t look incredibly
remarkable from where he was standing, but from where he was he could see that
the address was marked specifically to him. Wordlessly, he took the envelope
from the young man and looked at the return address.

Goku’s instant change in attitude was startlingly apparent. The brunet was not
the sort of person to suddenly lapse into silence without reason, and it was
the lack of noise that caused him to look up from the envelope and across the
table. But Goku wasn’t even looking at him – he continued to stare at the
envelope in trepidation.

Usually he only got that look when he saw the bill for his tuition from the
university, but a single glance back at the return address explained why. It
was from one of the schools that Sanzo had applied to for the master’s program
in the fall. He had applied to four different graduate schools, but this one
was by far the best for his program. The university that both he and Goku were
attending had an amazing graduate program, but it still fell short in
comparison to this school. The school was 2000 miles away.

As if to shatter the tense mood, the clanging of metal resounded in the room as
something sounded to have fallen to the ground. Both men looked in the
direction of the stove, which had suddenly gone out. Cursing, Sanzo quickly
went back to the stove in an attempt to get it going again, but to no avail. It
was the fifth time that month that it had gone out. This time, he hadn’t even been
able to get the water to boil.

Revolted, he poured the water out and set the sauce pan in the sink. It didn’t
look like they were going to have ramen tonight, but he was secretly grateful
for that. He had begun to get sick of it day after day… But Goku’s stomach
wouldn’t be able to handle going without dinner.

There was another growl of a stomach, and Sanzo was surprised that it was his
own. Goku grinned sheepishly when his own stomach followed suit.

“Hey Sanzo, could we go out somewhere to eat?” He asked hopefully. “After all,
since the stove isn’t working right now…”

-*-*-

Sanzo didn’t understand him sometimes. He watched quietly as Goku ran a few
meters ahead of him – the young man looking all around him as he went.

Having been convinced that going out to eat would be much better than running
to the convenience store for some microwavable ramen, Sanzo thought it would be
best to go to the restaurants near campus. They would be the only places open
this late, even on a holiday. That, and they were cheap.
He could handle eating out as long as it was cheap and they didn’t do it too
often.

The restaurants weren’t nearby, and the path they took went straight through
their college campus. As everything on campus was, it was incredibly familiar.
They had been there last a few weeks ago when finals had come and gone at the
end of the fall semester. That, and this was the same
path they had often walked back to their dorm in their first year of school.
They even passed the old dormitory, and it looked exactly as they had left it.
Goku turned animatedly towards it and grinned.

“Wow… I can’t believe it’s been two and a half years since we lived there…”

He could. Often, it seemed much longer than that. “…are you going to say that every
time we walk by it in the evenings?” he asked, his tone slightly annoyed but
also slightly amused.

Goku looked at his lover for a moment, and his smile grew as he looked back at
the building. “Yes.”

“It gets annoying.”

“Sorry,” the brunet sheepishly apologized. “But… sometimes I miss it, ya know?”

Sanzo raised his eyebrows skeptically. “You miss rooming with the cockroach?”

“No,” Goku scrunched his face in response, “but it wasn’t like I was rooming
with him for a long time anyways.” He then smiled again, and Sanzo fought to hold
back a small smirk of his own. While the second half of the year had not held
true to this statement, Gojyo was still technically Goku’s old roommate. And that
had been a match made in hell. They got more complaints about noise back then
than when Sanzo and Goku had started to sleep together.

But he had to admit, there were some things he missed. While bills never
went away, at least there were less of them. One was significantly larger than
the rest, but it meant less mail to process. Sanzo did miss that.

Glancing briefly down at the ground, he noticed a large patch of ice in their
path. Goku, who was still staring at their old dorm, did not see it and stepped
out onto it unknowingly.

“What the-” Despite the sidewalks being mostly salted, it appeared that a spot
had been skipped. Slipping, Goku reached out for Sanzo, and the blond
instinctively grabbed the falling man. Unfortunately, by then he had stepped
out onto the ice himself, and he didn’t have any better traction. Pulling Goku
towards him in an attempt to regain his own lost balance, he found them both
still falling – only in the opposite direction.

The snow cushioned their fall somewhat, or at least Sanzo’s own, anyways. He
was grateful for that – the idea of his ass hitting the ice did not sound
appealing at all. And having Goku land on top of him would be more appealing if
the fall hadn’t knocked the wind out of him. He would have cursed if he had the
air in his lungs to form the words. He had also wanted to wipe that sheepish
grin off of Goku’s face…

“Sorry, Sanzo,” the brunet apologized. “I guess I wasn’t watching where I was
going…”

“Che. Obviously.”

As the young man shifted to at least raise himself so that he was not
completely on the other, Sanzo noted with a raised eyebrow that one hand was on
his upper thigh. “You sorry about that too?”

Goku himself didn’t seem to realize where his hand was at first either, but the
sheepish expression quickly disappeared. “I was,” he started, but then moved
his hand further up Sanzo’s thigh before continuing, “now
I’m not.”

“Get off of me.” However, the lack of air in his lungs made his statement sound
more like a suggestion than a command.

“Aww… c’mon Sanzo. Campus is deserted…”

“That isn’t the point,” he said quickly. “It’s freezing.”

“It’s not that bad,” Goku said impishly.

“You aren’t the one lying in the snow,” he shot back.

Goku smirked and brought his face closer. “What if we switched?” he whispered
slowly.

“…then we’d both be cold,” Sanzo reasoned.

“I’m never cold when you’re on top of me.”

Sanzo found himself shivering, although it wasn’t from the frigid winter air.
“This isn’t the place for that.”

Goku leaned in and gave his lover a brief kiss. “It isn’t like you to turn me
down like that.”

“I’m not,” he said simply, “just not here.”

“Aww, you’re no fun,” Goku protested, but nevertheless got up and off of Sanzo.
Brushing the snow off of his kneecaps, he then offered his hand to the man
still lying on the ground. Batting the hand away, he pushed himself up. He
didn’t need any help, and he suspected that if he had accepted it, he
would have just pulled Goku onto him again.

“I thought you were hungry.” Running his hand through his hair, he scowled. The
snow was in his hair, damnit. If this was what he got for helping someone out,
then he wasn’t going to again. At least, that is what he kept on telling
himself.

-*-*-

Much sooner instead of later, which Sanzo was infinitely grateful for, the string of
restaurants came into view. It didn’t take them that long to make a choice –
there was only one that was still open despite the late hour. The establishment
was new to them, but the building was not. While ownership changed more times
than he could count, it still sold the same kind of food. A
type of food which happened to not be ramen.

“We haven’t been here in so long…” Goku grabbed the handle to the door and
pulled. The smell of grills and the dusty old wood of the building wafted over
the both of them. Some would call the smell nostalgic, but Sanzo didn’t really
think that much about it. He wasn’t the kind of person to get sentimental about
these sorts of things.

Absentmindedly he grabbed a menu from the pile by the entrance and pulled Goku
to a spot in the corner. It was the farthest away from the door, and therefore
the farthest away from the cold. He would have sat closer to the grill, but as
he took his seat facing the rest of the restaurant, he caught a glimpse of
someone he wasn’t expecting to see. You’ve got to be kidding me – why the
hell is HE here?

“Awww, can’t we sit closer to the grill, Sanzo?”

He had disappeared, but the blond had the distinct feeling that this wasn’t a
good sign. “No.”

“Why not?” Goku complained.

“The food won’t get cold in the minute more it takes to bring it over here,”
Sanzo reasoned. He was also seriously considering leaving. If there had been
any other shops open, he would have just left and gone there, but he was
trapped now. He hated being trapped. Especially by him.
And as if to spite him, the man walked out from the door to Sanzo’s left right
at that moment. Cursing, Sanzo looked away in annoyance.

“What the-” Goku exclaimed, and Sanzo turned back to find his lover suddenly
wearing a Santa hat. It was pulled down past his eyes, and he had to grab the
rim of white fur and pull up before he could stare in disbelief at their
“waiter.”

“Merry Christmas, Son Goku,” and all-too familiar voice responded. Sanzo
frowned while Goku cracked a smile.

“Homura! I didn’t think I’d see you again today…”

“It is indeed a pleasant surprise,” Homura said with a small smile. “I did not
think you would stop by here to see me after our chat this afternoon…”

“Our stove broke,” Sanzo said shortly. “That’s all.”

“A Merry Christmas to you too, Sanzo,” the black-haired man said cordially.
“But that is not a very polite greeting,” Homura said in a lightly reproachful
tone. “Especially on a holiday.”

“It isn’t a holiday yet,” he said shortly, pointing to the clock on the
wall, which read 11:15. He could act
like himself for at least forty-five minutes more before anyone could protest
and ask him to change his mannerisms for a day.

However, Homura ignored the remark and turned to the other man sitting down.
“How are you doing today, Goku? I heard they called you in…”

Homura, Sanzo was reminded, worked at the video game store in the mall with
Goku. And by the looks of the outfit that the black-haired man was wearing now,
it appeared that Goku wasn’t the only one who had to work two jobs to pay the
bills.

The two talked for a short time before the cook called out to the table. “Are
there people out there? Take their order and get over here!”

Conversation ceased for a short while as Homura took their orders.

“I see,” he nodded as he scribbled down the last word on the pad. Looking up,
he smiled. “This hat suits you, my friend.” He then flicked the cotton ball at
the end of the hat and looked at Sanzo. “What do you think?”

“He looks ridiculous,” Sanzo replied and looked away.

The blond didn’t want to say anything to encourage the man, but Sanzo also
couldn’t deny that it really drew attention to Goku’s face. A face that
currently had an annoyed expression on his face, but it was more of an amused
sort of annoyed. He was pretending to not like the hat, but really did. The
spectacle was comical.

“Awww… has Sanzo not gotten into the spirit of Christmas yet?”

“Go to hell.”

“I guess not. I take it you haven’t given him his present yet…?” he looked
pointedly at Goku. “Even after spending all that time today looking for it?”

That caught Sanzo’s interest. “I thought you were at work.”

“I was!” Goku said quickly. “I was looking for it on my break…”

So he had a meal break after all, but skipped it to look for a gift. A gift for him. But Sanzo was confused; he could have sworn
Goku had commented before about buying his gift about a week ago…

“Actually, if you would have given it to him, I don’t think you to would be
eating out at the moment…”

The blush on Goku’s face made Sanzo instantly suspicious. “Um…”

Sanzo hated not knowing what was being talked about, especially when it involved
him. And especially since Homura knew about whatever Goku was up to…

“Stop yer yapping and take the order! We don’t have
all night!” the cook called out again.

Homura smiled again as he headed towards the door. “Be right there.” He stopped
again and turned his head back to look at Goku. “I shall see you two in a few
minutes then. And Goku – do not forget to think about what we talked about
yesterday. The offer is still open.”

“I will -” he started, and then cut himself off. “Wait, what about your hat?”

“Keep it. I got it for you anyways.” Somehow, that only annoyed Sanzo more. His
gaze immediately fixed itself back on Goku.

“What the hell was all that about?”

Goku’s act of virtuousness failed miserably. “What do you mean?”

“What did he want you to think about?”

Fidgeting, Goku looked away and towards the grills. “I really hope they bring
our food soon…”

“Don’t try to change the topic,” Sanzo said shortly. He had no patience when it
came to Goku’s relations with his coworker. The look that Homura would give
Goku when the young man wasn’t looking was one that Sanzo knew very well. He
knew it was how he himself looked at the brunet before they had started to
date. When it came to trust, he did trust Goku, but he had none for
Homura. And he did not like all of the time they spent together –
coworkers or not. He knew that Goku would never cheat on him, but…

“Well…” The brunet started.

“What?”

Goku paused. “What are you going to do about the letter?”

That was unexpected. Sanzo hadn’t particularly wanted to think about it while
they were out, but now his mind drifted back to it. And he realized that it was
still unopened.

“What about it?”

“Do you want to go?”

“It’s the best school in the country for my program,” he said simply.

“So do you want to go?”

He recognized the roundabout questioning from earlier that evening. He didn’t
have the patience to for it again. “What does this have to do with Homura?”

The younger man stared at his glass of water and poked an ice cube and pushed
it down to the bottom. It floated back up to the surface of the water, only to
be pushed back down again.

“…do we have to talk about this tonight?”

Sanzo scowled and reached out to still Goku’s hand. He’d never get an answer
when Goku was distracting himself.

“It seems like he wanted you to consider it soon…”

Goku looked longingly at his glass of water again – as if he wanted to start
playing with his drink a second time. His response had not been the first thing
he expected to hear.

“I’m not going to be able to afford the rent and my tuition at the same time. I
mean, I wouldn’t be able to afford rent by myself,” he explained.

“Whoever said that you had to pay for my share?” Sanzo demanded.

“But if you go off to that other school, you’re going to have to move there.”

“We agreed that if I went it wouldn’t be permanent. You should be finishing up
school the same time I will.”

“But it’s two years!” Goku protested. “You can’t pay two different rents at the
same time, not even if you get that scholarship. And…” he hesitated, “I’m going
to have to go part-time again next semester to afford rent even if you decide
to stay.”

He had no idea the situation was that bad. In a way,
he was hurt that he hadn’t realized it sooner. “…why didn’t
you say anything earlier?”

“…I don’t want you to have to pick up the rent,” he shook his head
fiercely, “Not again.”

Sanzo did know Goku hated that with a passion. He hated to babied.
Sanzo knew more than anyone that his lover was far from childish – at least in
these matters. The brunet knew when it was time to be serious.

“It’s our apartment,” he said simply. “I’m just making sure the bills
are paid on time.”

“But Sanzo…”

Something clicked in his mind, and his eyes narrowed. “Homura asked you to room
with him, didn’t he?”

“You know I can’t afford an apartment any other way – and I can’t stay on
campus while going part-time…”

His eyes narrowed. “You can’t stay with Nataku or someone else?”

“Nataku’s dad would flip if he got a roommate, for some reason,” Goku shrugged.
“No one else has a room.”

“Do you want to?” Sanzo asked, watching Goku’s expression carefully.

“Where else can I go?” the brunet pleaded. “I can’t go with you…”

True. But… “What if I stayed?”

The younger man blinked. He appeared to not expect to have heard that. “…what?”

“What if I didn’t go?” Sanzo elaborated. “Would you
still accept his offer?”

“Of course not!” Goku said firmly. “I want to stay with you!”

“Then why were you encouraging me to apply to this school?” he challenged.

“It has the best program for you in the nation,” Goku said logically. “You
deserve to go there.”

Sanzo took a sip of his water. “This school program is also good.”

Goku blinked at the words. “But… I thought you weren’t going to apply here…”

“…I never said I wasn’t.”

-*-*-

The food had finally arrived, and for Goku it felt like it had been an
eternity. It had completely slipped his mind that Homura worked here in the
evenings, and while he enjoyed the man’s company, he also knew that Sanzo did
not. Things weren’t going as they were supposed to. This wasn’t supposed to
come up tonight – not during the holiday. He knew very well about the situation
at hand, and that his could possibly be their last Christmas together for a few
years. This one was to be extra special. It had to be just right.

But it seemed like it wasn’t meant to be. Whenever he set his mind to
something, it never went the way he planned it to. When those plans involved
Sanzo it often changed even more, given the blond’s
unpredictability.

The silence that had followed their conversation held a promise that Goku
wasn’t too sure about its legitimacy. With Sanzo being as upset as he was about
running into Homura, he knew it was better to inquire about the answer now.

So instead, he paid great attention to his plate, and the flawlessly grilled
okonomiyaki that now sat on it. “Wow… it’s so perfect…”

Sanzo snorted and picked up the knife to cut his own in half.
Goku did not bother with such measures, and simply picked the whole thing up to
take a bite.

As he ate, he wasn’t sure if it was his imagination or not, but Sanzo was not
eating that much. In fact, by the time Goku had finished his plate, his
companion had only finished a third of his. True, Goku had always been the
faster eater of the two, but still…

“Aren’t you hungry, Sanzo?”

The blond looked down at his food, and then shook his head. “Why, do you want
it?”

His face lit up as the partially-eaten okonomiyaki was handed to him. Goku was
well-aware that they could only afford one plate each, and lunch had been a
very long time ago. Murmuring a quick thanks, he
started to work on his new dish.

-*-*-

Habits were hard to break, as Sanzo had discovered long ago. No matter what
happened, he’d always drift back to a particular pattern. That was just how he
was. He knew it was how Goku was, too.

As the brunet worked on demolishing his food, he withdrew a cigarette and lit
it.

Sitting back, he went to take in his setting. From his location, he could see
everything that went on, except behind him. Not that it mattered, since it was
a wall. His seat was a position of power, and it was one that he never
relinquished.

However, this position was fairly boring this evening. Most people were at
home, preparing for the holiday. Those that weren’t were either the shopping
procrastinators – the ones who were the main reason for Goku taking so long to
get home – those that had to serve said procrastinators, or just people who
were bored out of their minds. Or people whose stove decided to die on them,
he corrected himself. Damnit, if the rent wasn’t as low as it was, he wouldn’t
even attempt to put up with this crap. Either way, their landlord was going to
get an earful about it soon enough.

He didn’t notice at first where his gaze kept on ending up until the third time
he caught himself staring at Goku. It was unusual for him to watch him like
this when only the brunet was eating, but there was really no one else in the
restaurant. It was the reason he had to keep telling himself.

Sanzo didn’t understand how his lover tried so hard to retain a cheerful
attitude on things. It was easy to tell now-a-days when that goofy smile of his
was a fake. The real smiles, especially since he had sent out his applications
for graduate school, had dropped significantly.

He silently cursed to himself. Hadn’t he been warned that it was a bad idea to
go to school based on where one’s partner was? Didn’t that still apply to
couples that had been together for three years, or only for the shorter ones?
He didn’t know. All he knew was that it wouldn’t affect his decision. He
also completely ignored the fact that the letter he had received still remained
unopened.

Giving up on trying to find something more interesting
than Goku to look at in the restaurant, Sanzo knocked a few of the ashes off of
his cigarette into the glass ashtray. The brunet seemed to make everything
interesting, but one of the biggest ways was eating. Sanzo didn’t know whether
to be disgusted or amused, or possibly both. Only small children got that messy
while eating, and Goku was no child.

What really got to him was a bit of mayonnaise on the corner of the
brunet’s mouth. Goku was getting much better about eating in public, and would
often pause to use a napkin. But this bit of mayonnaise seemed to elude every
single one. Pointing it out wouldn’t do any good – Goku was terrible at trying
to find indicated spots like that. Sanzo could either wipe Goku’s face with a
napkin, but then it would look like he was being babied, and Goku hated
that.

Smirking to himself, Sanzo got an idea. After a “normal” exhale of smoke, he
set the halfway finished cigarette on the ashtray, and watched as Goku ate the
last bit of food. Another wipe of a napkin, and he missed the spot again.
Snorting, Sanzo shook his head. He shouldn’t have been surprised.

Goku looked up from his empty plate as he set the used napkin onto the table.
“What”

“You still have some sauce on your face.”

“Really? Where?” He went to
look in his reflection in the window, but Sanzo caught his chin with his
fingers.

He smirked again, this time at the expression on his lover’s face. A quick
glance around the restaurant reminded him that no one was watching. Leaning
forward and bringing Goku’s face closer to his at the same time, he licked the
mayonnaise off of the corner of the brunet’s mouth. “There.” He nipped at
Goku’s lip teasingly, and then brushed their lips together.

Goku looked a bit surprised by the action, but didn’t reject it. However,
before it could be make deeper, Sanzo pulled away and picked up his cigarette
again, acting as if nothing had taken place. He hadn’t forgotten what had
happened on the sidewalk. Teasing was the best and worst way to get back at
Goku. He was issuing a challenge to the younger man, and there had never been a
time before when it would be turned down.

Breaking eye contact, he looked up the moment Homura came out of the kitchen.
He said nothing, but signaled that he wanted their check. The waiter had an
expression on his face that made Sanzo wonder if Homura had somehow seen what
he had just done.

No matter how tense the moment had been, Goku immediately lapsed back into his own
routine.

“Aww… I wish I could have another…” the complaint wasn’t as harsh on his ears
as it could have been. Goku was well-aware of their money situation.

Homura made his way back to their table, answering the question he knew the
younger man wasn’t going to ask. “You know, Goku, I am sure I could convince
the cook to give the both of you a deal for another plate-”

“No,” Sanzo interrupted. “We’re full.”

“But Sanzo…”

A glare quieted the brunet down, and he handed the waiter his credit card. The
only one he had right now that didn’t happen to be maxed out. Goku waited to
say anything until after Homura had left to ring them up.

“Wouldn’t it be great if there was a credit card out there with an unlimited
balance and you never had to pay the bills…?” he asked wistfully.

Hell, that would be nice. Too bad those sorts
of things didn’t exist. Not even in a contest would someone give away something
like that.

“If we did have one, then you’d be in the restaurants constantly.”

“That’s bad?”

Sanzo held his head in his hand. “Idiot…”

-*-*-

Their landlord had still not been in when they returned. While Goku was not
very happy about not being able to use their stove (and oven, for that matter),
he was not nearly as frustrated about it as Sanzo. He was just fortunate that
Sanzo had gotten something to eat – he would have been much more irritable if
he hadn’t.

The first thing Goku had down when he got back to the apartment was scour it for
food. He gravitated to their Christmas tree that was looking a bit bare. The
time to ask was now or never.

“Hey Sanzo, do you think we could buy more candy canes for the tree?”

“No.”

Shot down – not that he didn’t expect it. “Why not? They’re really cheap…”

“You just keep eating them.”

“That’s what they’re for.”

“We had plenty,” Sanzo said, exasperated.

“They’re all gone, now.”

“That’s what happens when you eat them, idiot.”

“But…”

“No.”

Goku was getting irritated. If he couldn’t eat anything, he at least wanted
something to suck on. He had been about to say just that, but then he saw a
familiar gold box hidden in the back.

“Oh wow…” he said in awe. “When did you get that?”

“Earlier today when I went in to pick up my paycheck.” The man practically
collapsed back onto the couch. “It was the company’s present to their
employees.”

“Ohh…” he nodded, still looking at the package. “Can I have one?”

“You’d end up eating them all.”

“But you never eat them…”

He made a face in disgust. “That’s because I’m sick of them.”

“Then why not?”

“Because they aren’t your gift to unwrap. And it isn’t the one I
want to get this evening.”

Tradition was tradition, as always. Born of his impatience, they both picked
one gift to open on Christmas Eve. That was, unless the other thought that a
particular gift should be unwrapped then. Some gifts that they had exchanged
had proven to be very… useful… later in the evening.

But wait… isn’t it almost technically Christmas? Goku mused. Maybe he’d
be able to get some of them later then…

Looking under the tree, Goku tried to figure out which of the gifts from him
Sanzo was talking about. It didn’t take that long to figure out what one he was
referring to.

“Where is the gift that person mentioned?”

That stopped Goku in his tracks. “What are you talking about?” Playing dumb
wouldn’t really buy him time, especially not with the say Sanzo’d see through
it, but it was worth a shot.

“The one you missed your actual dinner for.” Yes, he should have
expected Sanzo to be highly interested in the thing that would make him
want to skip his food for. Glancing over at the clock, he saw that it was 11:55. He wanted to give it to Sanzo on
Christmas…

Well, if he could distract the man for five minutes, then he’d be able to tell
him. It was something he had planned for. He grinned at the thought. It
wouldn’t be hard to do.

“What the hell are you smiling about?” the blond demanded, his eyes narrowing.
“Don’t tell me you got something from Eden Fantasies again…”

“You didn’t seem to mind it last year,” Goku said with an air of confidence,
walking closer. “Not with the way you were screaming.”

“Rope would have been cheaper,” Sanzo said reasonably, leaning back. He made no
move to stop Goku’s advance.

“I thought you didn’t like the burns it gives you.”

“That isn’t the point.”

“You liked it,” he smirked as he settled into Sanzo’s lap. “Too bad you didn’t
get a chance to use them on me.” The blond had vowed to pay him back for that,
but…

Sanzo paused, and then smirked himself. “That reminds me.”

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“Yeah right.” They drew closer, but as they did there was a flicker of
light above their head. Looking up, they saw the light waver again and
completely die, throwing the apartment into darkness.

“Goddamnit, it begins…” Goku heard Sanzo curse. The mood broken out of
irritation on both of their parts, Goku slid to the side to let Sanzo get up
and head towards the kitchen.

They hadn’t lost power yet this season, but they had experienced it enough
times the year before to settle into a routine whenever it happened. Goku knew
that Sanzo wasn’t going to continue any sort of activities until he knew that
he’d be able to maneuver around the apartment without walking into anything. He
felt a little lucky, however, when the light went out. It would buy him time.

The brunet stumbled back towards the drawer in the end table
that the little tree was standing on – trying to find things by touch and not
by sight. This drawer held everything and nothing all at the same time,
so there was a chance that a stray candle had found its way in there. Or even
better yet…

His fingers touched two objects simultaneously. One he immediately grabbed and
flipped the switch, but it did not come on. A few hard smacks of the flashlight
on the palm of his hand brought forth a beam of light. After making a mental
note to replace the batteries, he went to examine the other item.

A mischievous grin laced his features at seeing that he had been correct with
his other guess. Setting it under the tree, he then continued his hunt for
things they could use.

-*-*-

It figured that Goku would be the one to find a flashlight first, Sanzo noted
with a snort. It wasn’t any fault of the younger man’s when he kept on bumping
into things. The candles were most likely going to be in the kitchen, anyways.

His foot caught the edge of a box in the pantry and he found himself swearing
yet again. The sound of something soft yet hard hitting the ground at the same
time kept his attention on his foot. An unseen object rolled and stopped as it
rammed with his stubbed toe.

This was ridiculous. Pulling out his lighter, he flicked it quickly to try to
find the box of candles. It had to be the one he stubbed his toe on – if it
wasn’t then he had no idea what the hell it might be. Revolted with the whole
ordeal but relieved that he had been right about the contents of the box; he
quickly grabbed some pillar candles and lit them the moment he set them on the
table.

The gods must hate him, Sanzo thought seriously. The day had been one mishap
after another, and he blamed it all on the holiday season. The weather didn’t
hinge on the holidays, but it didn’t stop him for blaming it on Christmas any
less.

As he shifted in his chair, the candlelight wavered with him. He paid no
attention to the dancing shadows, but the pile of mail on the table. Everything
had been opened except for one thing. A quick reach later and it was in his
hands.

The envelope was thick. When applying to various undergraduate programs, Sanzo
had been accepted to many schools, and even refused by a few. The thick
envelopes always meant yes. He had yet to be proven otherwise.

Then, if he already knew the answer, why didn’t he open it up to verify? He had
also applied for a scholarship there, and that answer was not as concrete as
his acceptance to the school. The shadows danced again, and again Sanzo did not
take any notice.

A finger brushed his cheek, startling the blond out of his concentration.
Peering over, he was both surprised and not at the same time to see Goku standing
there by his side. His lover had always been very good at sneaking around, even
on these creaky old floor boards. The brunet smiled at him briefly before
leaning in to give him a short kiss, taking Sanzo by surprise.

“What was that for?” he asked, intrigued by the sudden form of affection.

Goku shook something above both of their heads and Sanzo looked up. It was
mistletoe. Fresh mistletoe too, by the smell of it.
The smile was still there, and while he could see the mischief in it, he also
saw a hint of sadness too. Goku had seen him about to open the letter.

“Where did you get that?” he asked, pushing his chair out so that he was a bit
farther away from the table. Goku appeared to take this as an invitation for
him to sit down, and did so by leaning in for another kiss as he went to
straddle Sanzo’s lap.

“It’s a secret,” he whispered, bringing their faces closer. “And you can’t
dodge this one.”

Sanzo didn’t remember saying anything about dodging, and would have protested
that remark, but he found it much more desirable to show Goku through action
that he was willing to accept the challenge. His fingers found their way into
Goku’s hair and closed the gap between them. He smirked. Goku still tasted of
the okonomiyaki he had earlier that evening. It wasn’t a bad taste, but there
were others that he preferred more. He knew that he must taste the same way,
but as the brunet pushed their chests together, it appeared that he didn’t mind
too much either. Sanzo vaguely noted that Goku’s fingers were not starting
their usual pursuit down his side, but on his arm. One arm traveled down to
semi-circle loosely around Goku with his hand resting on the small of the man’s
back. The other was still on the table, holding the letter. When their fingers
met on the envelope, he let the young man pry him away from it, and
intertwining their fingers together.

So. It appeared that Goku didn’t want him to open the
letter. Sanzo already knew that his lover never wanted him to open it. But… he
caught a glimpse of the clock. It was 12:10
– officially Christmas day.

Goku bit Sanzo’s lip gently, and he parted them willingly. He felt his lover
lower the arm holding the mistletoe, but neither of them broke the kiss. As the
arm wrapped around his neck, he realized briefly that it wouldn’t be bad to
wait a day to find out about what the school said. It appeared that what Goku really
wanted for Christmas was Sanzo, and that was a gift he didn’t mind giving.

-*-*-

Looking back on that night,
neither one had been able to figure out how they got from the kitchen to their
bed, especially in the minimal light. It was hard enough to do so even when all
of the lights were on. But now they found themselves in a much more comfortable
position, and as Goku noted with triumph, a much tastier one.

It had been much easier to convince Sanzo to let him having some of the
chocolate that he had brought home from work when he pointed out that it was
technically Christmas, and as long as Sanzo was the one to feed him them.
Although it was a bit difficult for Goku to breathe, much less eat anything.
But he had a reputation to keep, and there was no way in hell that he’d turn
down Godiva chocolate. Especially when they were his favorite
– chocolate-covered strawberries.

Sanzo’s tongue crept out of his mouth and traced Goku’s lips, lazily cleaning
the young man of the sweet from his face. It was pointless, though, because the
moment that they decided to have another strawberry, the process would be
repeated.

Ok, not so pointless, then.

Goku grasped the collar of Sanzo’s shirt and pulled the man into a deep kiss.
He already had his mouth open, waiting for the blond to enter. Sanzo, who had
picked up another strawberry, did not protest at all, and in fact climbed over
the young man so that he was completely over him.

The only light in the room was by a single candle on the nightstand. It was a
sturdy one that wouldn’t knock over easy even if they hit it, and for that Goku
was grateful. The last thing they needed was for there to be a fire. But he was
distracted from that thought as Sanzo probed deeper into his mouth, stroking
their tongues together in antagonizing slow movements. Moaning, he tried to
call out the blond’s name, but to no avail. They were
to busy “sparring” for actual speech.

Dimly aware of the depletion of air from his lungs, Goku debated between
separating and sucking on Sanzo’s tongue. Both had their benefits, but he was
grateful when Sanzo pulled away – making the decision for them. Gasping, the
brunet struggled to fill his lungs to full capacity, but found for what must
have been the twentieth time that night he found that he couldn’t. His
breathing had become irregular in an attempt to accomplish the impossible feat.

Above him, Sanzo was either fairing much better or was just better at hiding
it. Based on personal experience, Goku was willing to bet on the latter. He saw
Sanzo smirk, and hold the strawberry that had been in his fingers just far away
enough that Goku had to lift his head to get to it.

Sucking on the strawberries was his favorite part. He loved to watch the blond’s face, and see how he reacted to it. Sometimes he
would do it fast and finish quickly, while other times he would be much slower.
It delighted him to watch Sanzo’s eyes fill with lust when he did so. To add
emphasis, he let one of his hands wander over his lover’s body. There were many
places he could have touched, but he decided to go for his main, and favorite,
target. Using his other arm to help hold the blond in place, Goku pressed the
palm of his wandering hand softly yet decisively into Sanzo’s groin.

“Shit…” Sanzo swore, dropping the hand that had been holding the strawberry and
pressing the pads of his fingers into Goku’s neck – trying to balance himself. Wincing at first, Goku did his best to not cease
the motion. His efforts were rewarded when he heard Sanzo hiss. Sanzo moaned
and groaned often enough, but he rarely hissed. It was an even rarer occurrence
than hearing him scream.

Goku wanted to make him do all of that. And he had been able to before.
This time he wanted to see if he could make the blond as vocal while dominating
than when he was submissive. Goku had no intention of topping his lover
tonight, as was their custom. He had an overwhelming desire for Sanzo to touch
him. He wanted to be touched everywhere. Even the thought made him
squirm in anticipation.

Moving his hand, he caressed the inside of the older man’s thigh – cursing the
pants that still remained. He wanted to remove them so badly so he could touch
Sanzo’s skin. But it was Christmas, and Goku was going to let Sanzo set the
pace. But hell, next time he was going to rip Sanzo’s clothes off of his body.
He didn’t care if he’d get smacked for it later.

When the blond had been able to refocus his eyes, he narrowed them at Goku. “I
thought you wanted strawberries.”

“I do,” he said impishly, grabbing the hand that had been holding the treat.
There was some melted chocolate still on them. “I’m not finished eating this
one.” With that, he took Sanzo’s middle finger and drew it into his mouth.

“I don’t remember my fingers ever looking like strawberries before,” he said,
sounding amused. But nevertheless his breathing started to become sharper as
Goku hungrily suckled on his lover’s finger.

The blond’s other hand, which he had been using to
help prop himself up, was now on his chest, playing with the buttons on Goku’s
shirt. They were both well aware that Sanzo was perfectly capable of
unbuttoning just about anything single-handedly, with either hand for that
matter. There were many advantages to having an ambidextrous lover.

Smirking, the brunet took the chocolate-tipped forefinger into his mouth and
ran his tongue down its length. He wasn’t about to miss a bit of chocolate,
especially when there was much more to be eaten.

-*-*-

The silent innuendo had not been lost on him. Sanzo was not stupid – with each
stroke of his lover’s tongue caressing his finger he thought of what it felt
like to have Goku’s mouth elsewhere on his body. His breath hitched at the
thought, and he looked down at his lover in an expression of raw lust. Damn him
for being able to do this to him. His pants were growing tighter by the second,
making them increasingly uncomfortable.

Goku’s tongue touched the underside of one of the joints in his forefinger at
that moment, at the same time as the other hand traveled back to the bulge
between his legs. He felt his fingers curl within Goku’s mouth, and he and he
shuddered at feeling the slick softness of the inside of the warm cheek.

“Shit, Goku…” His other hand clenched the still buttoned shirt tightly. The
younger man’s expression did not seem to lose any of its amusement. If
anything, it was asking a question.

“What?”

“Unzip me.” He’d do it himself, but since Goku’s hand
was already there, it was just more convenient. More efficient too, and he had
always preferred for things to run smoothly.

The problem was that Goku liked making things difficult.

Grinning, the younger man pressed his palm slowly down, and Sanzo was tempted
to close his eyes. Instead he forced himself to muster up a glare. He knew it
wouldn’t do much, Goku would trust the hardness practically in his hand before
a half-hearted glare. Slowly pulling the fingers out of his mouth, Goku gave
them both a small nip before taking them out completely.

“The strawberry isn’t done yet,” he said simply, licking the chocolate off of
Sanzo’s thumb before tilting his head slightly to the side. “And I can’t get to
it all.”

Sanzo stopped for a second and eyed Goku suspiciously. He had something
planned. It was as if he had the whole thing already scripted, and he was
following every cue. The blond didn’t appreciate being read like that. He felt
like he was in some sort of performance.

A porno, more like it… he thought darkly. He was no actor, and
especially not a porn star, damnit. If Goku expected him to follow the “plan,”
then he was in for a surprise. Sanzo always preferred improvisation, anyways.
He had no patience for scripted parts.

It took all the control he could muster not to pin the brunet’s wrists behind
him with his hands. God, how he’d love to tie Goku up right then… He leaned
forward to whisper in his lover’s ear. “I can get it if you unzip me first.” He
bit the lobe for emphasis, and then licked it teasingly. “I can’t clean it up
like this.” His hand on Goku’s shirt traveled down to cover the one on his
groin. Pushing against it, he bit back a moan.

There was a pregnant pause as the two looked at each other – a challenge to see
who would give in first. Sanzo was about to lean in to lick Goku’s ear again
when he felt it. The small and nimble fingers he knew so well wriggled free
from his grasp and caught hold of his zipper. Pulling it down with excruciating
slowness, Sanzo both thanked and cursed his lover in the same breath. The
fingers then worked to help pull his arousal out of his jeans, but they both
noticed quickly that something was hindering it.

“You forgot to undo the snap, idiot.”

“You never said anything about that,” Goku replied innocently. Yeah. Sure. That
look on the brunet’s face suggested anything but innocence.

Sanzo shook his head, half annoyed and half amused as he undid the snap
himself. “Brat.”

“Hey, it isn’t my fault you weren’t specific enough.”

He had heard enough. “Shut up.” With that, he pushed their lips together
roughly, silencing whatever his lover had been attempting to say next. As he
bit Goku’s lip demandingly, he let his hand fall to the body beneath him before
moving it upward. Goku was starting to tremble ever so slightly, and Sanzo
wondered if he was even aware of it. Passing his fingers over the brunet’s own
covered arousal, he stroked it the best he could through the denim. His actions
were rewarded as he felt it become more prominent. The moans he felt in Goku’s
mouth as he explored begged for him to be set free as well, but Sanzo defiantly
refused the request. His hand traveled upward again, finally reaching the end
of the buttoned shirt.

It would have been easier to rid the brunet of his shirt had Sanzo had use of
both of his hands, but that was not to be. Goku seemed determined to keep hold
of the hand that he had recently licked clean of melted chocolate. The blond
didn’t mind as much as he might under other circumstances, but he had a
perfectly legitimate reason for it.

As one of his hands slowly undid each of the buttons and brushed the skin
underneath, the other was being carefully attended to by Goku’s fingers. The
young man hand always been skilled with his hands, and Sanzo was reminded of
one reason he enjoyed it so much. Known for his massages, Goku often tested his
new techniques out on his lover. And he still wasn’t sure how it worked, but
the slow motions of the thumb in his palm would gradually make his nerves
increasingly sensitive. His nerves didn’t need any help, but Goku’s
ministrations made the experience that much more pleasurable. He could feel
himself wanting to groan again, and when Goku’s other hand dipped their
fingers beneath his waistband of his jeans, he did.

They broke apart just as Sanzo undid the last button. He attempted to breathe
deeply, but failed. It didn’t look like his lover was fairing any better, but
he did enjoy watching Goku’s chest rise and fall as he pushed the shirt open.
There was just something so incredibly desirable about watching his lover gasp
for breath…

Much lighter than before, he brushed their lips together. They did not linger
there long, but it didn’t stop Sanzo from tracing the swollen lips with his
tongue yet again.

It was Goku who was groaning now, he noted with satisfaction, as he began his
pursuit along the brunet’s jaw line. He covered it with small nips, not nearly
strong enough to be called proper bites, as well as gentle touches of his
tongue. The path led him back to the ear he had tended to briefly from before,
and Sanzo smirked as he kissed it on the lower part of the lobe. Goku tilted
his head to the side to make it easier for the blond to access his ear, but in
the process also exposed the skin on his neck. Looking down at the bare skin
and finding the smudges of chocolate he had left from earlier, Sanzo found that
he couldn’t resist. He had been asked to finish off the strawberries, after
all.

All he had to do was breathe against the brunet’s neck in order to make him
shudder. There were very few things that he liked more than seeing his lover
squirm, and at that moment he couldn’t remember any of them. Biting down on the
juncture of jaw bone to neck, he enjoyed hearing the younger man yelp as his
body spasmed at the action. In reward Sanzo pressed
his tongue onto the bitten area, giving his own special sort of massage.

Goku’s yelps grew gradually louder as Sanzo moved further down his neck, closer
to his pulse. The blond felt almost like an animal with his obsession with
biting the bronzed skin and wanting to leave his mark in increasingly visible
areas for all to see. He did not like to share, and there was no way that he
was going do so with his lover. It was just in his nature to be stubborn like
that.

Throbbing underneath his lips, Sanzo felt Goku’s pulse increase in speed at his
touch. Instead of biting down, he gently licked the area, making it slick for
when he fastened his mouth to it. The grip on his hand tightened considerably
as the brunet inhaled sharply. His lover had always been an easy person to get
a reaction out of, and sudden changes in patterns or routines brought out the
best ones.

Smiling against the brunet’s neck, he decided to let his hand on the heaving
chest take the blind man’s approach and read the Braille messages on the body.
His hands had learned to read by touch long ago, and he had Goku’s body
memorized. Goku’s body was a book that he would never grow tired of reading.
Pressing his forefinger a bit more firmly into the skin than the rest, Sanzo
drew an erratic line across the muscles until he stopped at the small nub on his
upper chest. He hesitated, although not out of uncertainty, and then tweaked
it.

The moan that resulted was very quiet, and if Sanzo wasn’t as close to Goku as
he was right now he probably would have not heard it. Mentally, he scoffed.
There was nothing impressive about that. He wanted to give their neighbors
something to complain about.

Instead of tweaking it again, Sanzo rubbed the round nub a little bit more
ambitiously, yet deceptively gentle in appearance. He knew that Goku would be
able to tell his true intensions in that touch. “I must have taken the wrong
man to bed,” Sanzo murmured in a lofty tone against Goku’s skin. “I could have
sworn you’d be louder when I do this-” Cutting himself off, he pinched the
nipple slowly. Goku was louder, but still not to Sanzo’s standards. He had
always felt entitled to the best. It was a reason he took Goku as his lover –
there was no one else like him in the entire world. Few humans could say that
about themselves. Then again, maybe he was just biased.

Remembering his promise, Sanzo moved along Goku’s neck, cleaning him of the
chocolaty fingerprints he had left earlier. It was wonderful to lick the
brunet’s skin like he was – tending to it hungrily, like a tiger over its prey.
Not that Sanzo would ever tell Goku that analogy – the brunet would probably
flip him in response to show how “correct” it really was. The roles would be
switched, and Sanzo would find himself being preyed on. But being eaten by Goku
was a fate he’d gladly accept. Only a fool would turn down the younger man’s
ministrations, especially when he set his mind to it.

That wasn’t the case tonight. They’d always “fight” to see who would get top,
and Goku had proven to be fairly… eloquent… in these disputes. Sanzo habitually
seemed to find himself on his back or with Goku somehow behind him, or with
Goku’s head in his lap. Memories, some vague and some in great detail, filtered
back into his mind. They made him more determined to keep his position, but it
looked like it wouldn’t be that hard. Goku was not fighting for dominance
tonight. He was willingly submitting himself, and that made the blond’s desire to take him that much greater.

His lips traveled back to the younger man’s pulse and bit down resolutely.

-*-*-

Goku cried out in an exclamation of pain and longing, blending together into a
term that he couldn’t define. Words lost and gained meaning in these moments,
but they grew fewer and fewer as the struggle to even breathe grew greater.

It was a marvelous feeling to arch up against the blond and feel how aroused he
was becoming. Although it would feel even better if it was their skin touching
and not through cloth…

Goku smirked. To hell with letting Sanzo set the pace. If he was not going to
do anything, then Goku would just drop a few hints. Letting go of the blond’s other hand, he reached out
to grab the waistband of his most irksome obstruction. Pulling them an inch
down and paused, waiting for some sort of protest to his assertiveness. When he
got none he curled his fingers more decisively within the cloth and brought the
garment down to his lover’s knees.

“I was wondering when you were going to do that,” Sanzo said smugly as he
kicked off the pants. The man kissed his way back up Goku’s tanned, and now
blemished, skin to touch their lips together again. The brunet could feel his
lover’s mouth against his own as he spoke.

“You were waiting for me?” he grinned as his hands traveled slowly up Sanzo’s
thigh and to the bottom of his shirt.

“Well, you always seemed that you liked taking my clothes off yourself…”

Goku could feel him tremble under his touch as his fingers bushed the man’s
sides when he leisurely pulled the shirt off. They broke apart as briefly as
possible to pull it off, and then immediately came together again in a series
of brief kisses. The younger man could feel his eyelids long to close under the
touch, but he let them only slide half-way closed.

“Sanzo…” whispered between two kisses, bringing one of the blond’s
hands to the side of his opened shirt. “Take mine off too…”

“Can’t do it yourself?” Sanzo asked in an amused tone.

Goku curved his hips up to press into the blond’s,
and was satisfied when he heard his lover groan. “It feels better when you do…”

“Greedy brat.”

“Yeah, I know.”

Those were the last words he had been able to say, at least for awhile. His
shirt came off fairly easily, and he squirmed as Sanzo’s hands taunted his skin
with abbreviated strokes. It drove Goku insane how skilled Sanzo was with that…

“Stop squirming around,” the blond whispered as his hands traveled lower to
reach the button of Goku’s jeans.

“I can’t,” Goku whined, stretching underneath his lover for emphasis. “You’d
have to tie me up first…” The mere idea of being bound while Sanzo thoroughly
molested him only made him squirm even more.

“We broke the bondage straps last summer,” Sanzo reminded him. “The handcuffs too.”

“There’s some ribbon in the other room.”

The older man paused for a second for a second in thought before looking him in
the eye. “Ribbon won’t hold you.”

“It’s satin ribbon.”

“Satin isn’t stronger than leather,” he scoffed.

Goku smirked as he drew Sanzo’s head down to nibble on his lip. “I never knew
you to turn down an offer like that,” he said in a barely audible whisper.

“We could always try it on you first…” The suggestive comment was followed by
the rubbing of the blond’s side with his other hand.
He smirked as his lover pulled away and gave him a look that reminded him that
Sanzo would never back down from a challenge like that. Goku was not going to
let that ribbon go to waste, especially after all the time he had been
searching for that particular type.

He felt like he was under great scrutiny as the blond slid off the bed and got
up and kicked off his pants. In a way, the look he was getting was even more arousing
than any of the touches they had shared thus far. Only Sanzo could do that to
him with just a glance. He blushed a dark shade of red
at that, especially when he noticed that Sanzo’s main point of focus was on how
his pants had become incredibly tight. Very suddenly Goku wished that his pants
were off, so he could give Sanzo a better view. But if he took them off now
Sanzo might never get the ribbon…

Sensing this, the blond resolutely turned around and sauntered slowly out of
the room. Goku’s breath caught at the way the blond’s
shoulder blades slid smoothly under his skin as an arm was raised to touch the
door frame. Even in small moments when Sanzo was not trying to be seductive, he
was. Before he left, however, he turned back around. “Don’t move,” he
commanded, and then disappeared from sight.

-*-*-

Sanzo had paused when he heard Goku’s breath catch,
and resisted the temptation to turn back around to find what had caused the
reaction. He’d be back there soon enough.

Walking to the little Christmas tree was a bit awkward in his current state,
and with the power still out it was even worse. But he made it there, and that
was what mattered. It didn’t take him that long to find the ribbon in question.
Picking it up, it felt like the ribbon had been wound around something other
than a spool. Deciding not to question it, Sanzo made his way back to their
bedroom hastily. Out of habit more than anything else, the blond pulled the
door firmly shut behind him. Sanzo had always liked the air of privacy that a
closed door brought. Smirking, he looked back to where his lover lay, and his
expression faltered, even if not in a negative way.

Goku’s pants had become unzipped in his absence and pulled down to his thighs.
One of the brunet’s hands was on his chest, while the other…

Sanzo was torn between glaring and grinning, but opted to climb back onto the
bed and over his lover as fast as he could. “I told you not to move,” he said
reproachfully.

Goku panted in response, and appeared to have trouble speaking again. “But you
looked so…” he started, but halted when Sanzo caught hold of his hand. “I
couldn’t wait that long.”

The older man touched their lips lightly together as the hand that caught the
disobedient one started its own roaming over the forbidden area. Goku moaned at
the touch, begging Sanzo for more, but the blond had other things in mind. “No
more until you’re tied up.”

A pause that was very brief followed. Sanzo was fairly surprised with the way
Goku was responding to physical touch and his slightly odd change in behavior
this evening; he had expected the brunet to put his wrists quickly to the bars
of their headboard. Instead, there was a deep breath in attempt to soften his
shaking body. The moment lasted forever and a second, calming down Sanzo’s own
heartbeat with it. He was still breathing hard, but…

The moment of tranquility shattered as the small fingers teased his skin again.
They were on either side of him, tracing downwards in feathery, almost ticklish
touches. When the hands reached his lower part of his sides, the path was
altered to include his backside. Goku raised his head just enough so that their
lips not merely brushing together anymore, and Sanzo let him. He was vaguely
aware of how the brunet was caressing the small of his back, but didn’t really
pay attention until the hands reached the fabric of his boxers. But it was
sort-of a passive observation. Had he cared about whether he was wearing
anything, then he would have taken action.

Only a fool would want to keep their clothes on at a time like this, he
thought. It had just been a matter of time before Goku would do it for him. And
it was a great feeling – Sanzo loved how Goku would pull them off slowly over
his bottom and down his thighs. The younger man would cup each cheek at some
point during that and grasp firmly, often pushing him into his leg. The act of
possessiveness often amused him, but the amusement would get cut short the
moment Goku continued.

He was very good at getting attention like that.

Maybe it was his imagination, but it seemed like his boxers came off much more
quickly than usual. He wasn’t very sure how they had actually gotten them off
beyond his knees, and it’d be a mystery that they would most likely never
solve. The fingernails grazed him in a coarsely fashion as they slid back up
his body, until Goku removed his hands completely and put them behind his head.

“Ok,” the younger man whispered, “I’m ready.”

Sanzo wanted to wipe the smug look off of Goku’s face so badly, and his body
ached with the desire to do so. Grappling for the makeshift spool of ribbon
that had fallen to their side, Sanzo started to unravel it. The gold weave of
the threads shimmered in the candlelight, and the blond briefly wondered how
much it had cost. By the texture and the coloring, it had obviously not been
the cheap ribbon they usually bought to wrap their gifts with. It hadn’t been
long before the core of the spool to fall out and bounce lightly on the
mattress. Eying it suspiciously, he had a good idea of what it was, but as the
ribbon became unwound, he decided that his first priority was to bind the
brunet to their headboard. It was absolutely maddening how his lover was lying
beneath him asking to be tied up. Goku had always been a giving
individual, but this submission to him was…

He furrowed his eyebrows slightly together in an attempt to concentrate. A
futile attempt, maybe, but the ribbon was proving to be more difficult than he
had anticipated. The satin slipped easily through his first endeavor at a knot,
and when the second one failed as well he started to get suspicious. Below him
Goku was failing to hide a grin. The expression made him even more determined,
and on the third try he got the first knot done.

“Damnit Goku, why couldn’t you have found some rope?” he asked, aggravated.

“Rope isn’t Christmassy…” the brunet reasoned. “And the gold reminded me of
you.”

“You’re the one with the gold eyes,” he said simply as he grabbed Goku’s other
wrist and started to wrap it to the second bar on the headboard. Although it did
make him smirk slightly that Goku had made this particular color choice in full
knowledge that the ribbon would be used on him. The thought gave Sanzo a heady
feeling akin to what he had already been feeling build up inside of him in his
observance of Goku’s submission.

-*-*-

Wrists finally bound the best
that they could with the slippery ribbon, Goku tried in vain to relax, but his
heart only pounded harder. Sanzo took his time letting his hands glide down
Goku’s arm, causing him to shiver at the feathery touch. While the blond’s hands were busy, his mouth did not remain idle and
was already at his jaw again, the kisses quickly descended along the line of
his neck down to his chest.

He was beginning to have doubts about his decision, however. The moment Sanzo
had tied the last knot; he wanted nothing more than to hold onto him. It
figured. And as went lower to torture the nipple that had not been attended to
earlier, Goku knew that the moans he was making were about as twice as loud as
usual. Biting his lip, he pushed his head back into the pillow and pushed his
chest out towards Sanzo’s hot mouth.

Two hands at his sides held him firmly in place, and he was rewarded with the
small touch of tongue on the sensitive nub. His gasp was somewhat muffled by
his bitten lip, but by the twitch of his lover’s eyebrows, Goku could tell that
he was heard. He had almost expected for the “torture” (and he used that term
loosely) to be continued, knowing of the sadistic-like tendencies the blond
often possessed, and was surprised when the action ceased.

The hands wandered lower, leading the way for Sanzo’s mouth as he explored the
many creases in the brunet’s muscular chest. In the candlelight a glistening
trail could be seen, and it felt cool against the air of the room. The skin was
soon reheated, however, by the areas around it.

Very suddenly Goku felt Sanzo’s hands reach the top of his own pants. Lifting
his hips an inch off the mattress, they were pulled off quickly and thrown
aside. A more audible gasp escaped him at his sudden experience of freedom.
Sanzo didn’t even give him a chance to relish in the moment before he felt the
palms press firmly onto the top of his thighs. A second later he felt the wet
tongue dip into his navel, one of the most sensitive parts of his body. He
jerked up instinctively, but were held back from
moving more than a millimeter. The resistance made him feel like he was being
tied up even tighter, and his eyes slid shut.

Sanzo’s tongue flicked in and out, teasing the brunet in suggestive movements.
Goku could feel the heat inside of him increasing in intensity, and he dug his
heels into the bed to brace himself. Straining even harder against the ribbon,
he prayed for some give. How the hell did Sanzo ever let himself be tied up so
often? It was so goddamn frustrating…

A hand left his body and Goku could feel it travel across the sheets until it
abruptly stopped. Sanzo’s mouth left Goku’s body for a moment as he lifted his
hand to examine the bottle. There was a small curse that Goku barely heard, and
Goku knew it was because his lover was not wearing his reading glasses. Not
that either of them would think about getting them for this, and Goku sort-of
liked it. Sanzo’s body was physically perfect to the naked eye, but his
eyesight was flawed, even if slightly. It made him seem more human.

“Is this one from your own personal collection?” the blond asked, unscrewing
the cap. He already know what it was, even if not specifically. And there was
no way that he’d ask outright.

“Yeah,” Goku grinned. “Got it today. Took me awhile to
find…”

He saw Sanzo’s eyes widen briefly in recognition, then narrow as he caught a
whiff of the fragrance. “What the fuck? Peppermint oil?”

“It is Christmas…”

The blond just shook his head as he poured a small amount into his hand. Goku
closed his eyes again, and only moments later he felt the hands on his body
again.

Like Goku had done many times to the older man in the past, the relaxing and
sensuous motions of the oil-covered fingers massaged his stomach and hips. His
arms strained again at the ribbon, and he clenched his fists together in an
attempt to waylay his irritation. He was unconsciously moaning now, and when
Sanzo’s fingers teasingly drew patterns on the inside of his thighs, Goku
parted his legs so that it would be more accessible. When he heard the blond’s breath hitch, he cracked an eye open to look up at
his lover.

The blond wasn’t even looking at his face, but rather down at his hips and his
thighs. Goku could see how red his lover’s porcelain skin was becoming. It was
beautiful, and to see such a man look at him like that… look at him there
like that…

“Sanzo,” he moaned, catching the man’s attention. Their eyes met, and Goku
could see the desire in his lover’s gaze. His expression was unguarded, and the
brunet remembered with a note of satisfaction he was the only person who saw
that expression. Nothing needed to be said as Sanzo poured a little more oil on
his fingers and put his palm over Goku’s chest to steady him. Knowing what was coming, Goku struggled to breathe deeply to relax his body.
Full of anticipation, it didn’t help much, but it gave him some peace of mind. That, and the knowledge that Sanzo knew what he was doing.
He would probably know even better than himself what would work best…

A solitary finger pushed into him, and Goku struggled not to make any sort of
conflicting sound. He knew it was too late to hide his expression of
discomfort, and hoped that Sanzo wouldn’t notice. But it appeared that he did,
for by the time that he had become ready for the second finger, it was pushed
in with an almost uncharacteristic gentleness. The considerate action wasn’t
enough to keep Goku from squirming, however.

Sanzo’s hand traveled to his hips again, and a moment later he felt warmth and
wet touch him lightly at the tip of his arousal. Goku thanked Sanzo
incoherently in a groan, and struggled to push himself deeper into his lover’s
mouth. Surprisingly enough he was obliged for a few thrusts, and when a third
finger had been inserted into him, the pain was dulled enough by intensity of
the other pleasure that he did not protest.

Goku knew Sanzo was teasing him as he was going about their preparations,
especially when the thrusts had been halted in favor of slowly sucking on the
top. The blond’s tongue had already come into play,
and Goku shivered as he was stroked and tasted. The pull against his bonds
became more frantic - he wanted to bury his hands into Sanzo’s hair while he
also buried himself into the incredible heat of a mouth wanting to suck him
off.

The moment was briefly broken as he was given one last sweep with the tongue
before the mouth pulled away. Coming out later were the three fingers, leaving
a pleasing but strange sensation in their wake.

There was a pause, and then the sound of the cap returning. His eyes open, he
saw Sanzo generously coat himself before grabbing Goku’s hips to lift him up.
The blond looked briefly into Goku’s eyes, wordlessly asking permission even
after all their past experiences and their affections tonight. It was a habit
the brunet believed that his lover had picked up from him. There was no
hesitation to his answer as he did his best to push closer to where his lover
was waiting for him.

-*-*-

An expression of triumph highlighted Sanzo’s features as he pushed himself in.
His mind spun at the sudden tightness, and used all of his willpower not to
drive in farther. It would be worth it for both of them to give Goku time to
adjust. That and the last thing Sanzo wanted was to
hurt his lover because he couldn’t control himself. His pride wouldn’t forgive
himself if he lost control, either.

Taking in some air, he let it out slowly as he withdrew. He was dimly aware of
the sound of their mattress springs underneath him, but tuned them out in favor
of the noises of his lover. Leaning over the brunet’s body, he placed one hand
firmly into the mattress as he pushed back in, and deeper. Goku cried out in
pain, causing Sanzo to hesitate. Eyes focused on the face below him, he did not
see the legs wrap around his lower back as the body arched onto him. He found
himself moaning loudly and his grip tightening on the lean hip of his lover.

In a slow but very decisive motion, the legs locked around his waist, not
letting him go as Goku pushed Sanzo deeper into himself. The blond’s hand on the bed slid down so his arm could rest on
the mattress as he finally broke down and succumbed to his desire. Gritting his
teeth, he regained his determination and started to move within the younger
man.

The experience was so similar and yet so different at the same time. The
familiar emotions rang through his mind and the erotic fire still singed his
nerves in the most alluring way. He felt like he was holding onto something
incredibly valuable, but in reality the valuable one was the one holding him.
Even with Goku’s arms bound, he was still in his embrace.

Their breathing was ragged, and Sanzo’s throat felt like it would shut down in
protest if he couldn’t get any more oxygen to his body. Deciding to ignore his
better judgment, he started to move in a slow rhythm to spite his body’s
objections.

Creaking beneath them, the springs sounded with each stroke milliseconds before
it followed through to completion. He pushed in deeper, probing inside his
lover in search of the specific spot that he himself knew of so well. Again he
felt like a blind man, moving by touch and instinct more than anything else to
find what he wanted. And the groans his lover was emitting were an excellent
indicator of how close he was to finding it.

Needing more of the young man to hold onto, he let the hand still lying on the
mattress to snake around Goku’s shoulder and grasp onto it. The action seemed
to help push him deeper, and the brunet’s head fell back as he emitted a low
guttural sound somewhere between a groan and a whine. “Sanzo…”

That’s when he felt it. When the brunet had called out his name, he felt the
muscles beneath him tense as they struggled to hold onto something. One arm was
restrained by the ribbon, but the other… Sanzo had been able to feel the slack
in the arm attached to the shoulder he was holding onto, and he forced his head
to look up. Somehow, the ribbon had come undone for one of the wrists. And Goku… Goku had been holding his arm up there in an
attempt to keep him “restrained.”

The expression on his face told Sanzo that he was struggling with it, and
suddenly, he didn’t have a desire to see Goku hold his hand there anymore. The
fact that he was willing to in the first place sent shivers down his spine and
throughout his whole body, and he finally able to thank the younger man for
that by finding the spot he had been looking for.

Goku yelped in surprise – even if they knew what was coming
their heated touches and that anything more always felt like a surprise to
their bodies despite the knowledge – and the force at which he pulled against
the remaining ribbon should have been enough to rip it. But somehow it didn’t,
and Sanzo smirked to himself. Where the hell Goku had gotten that, he had no
idea. Moving his fingers on the shoulder slightly, he slowly pushed for the
brunet to lower the arm from the bedpost as he hit the spot again.

“What-” Goku started, before discontinuing his thought with a pleasure-filled
cry. It didn’t take that much encouragement after that to have his hand
directed to Sanzo’s back, where it scrambled to find a crevice to hold on.

His pace increased in speed then, relentless now in full knowledge that his
lover was enjoying himself as much as he was. Sanzo did his best to hit that
spot in every single stroke, failing only a few times. Goku gripped the outline
of the blond’s shoulder blades, pulling them so close
that nothing could be inserted between them. Resting his neck against the
bronzed shoulder, Sanzo could feel the tightness in his own muscles in his
chest. His body begged for relief, but he ignored his body yet again. He wanted
to remember every moment of this, and did not want to rush it.

Fingernails, which Goku always kept short, bit into his skin as he felt the
pressure on his back grow. Sanzo knew Goku had a death hold when it came to
things he found important, and was known to even cause bruising with his grip.
He did not personally bruise, but he did whenever Goku would hold onto him like
this. And Sanzo had never remembered being held onto so roughly and needy
before…

A few strokes later and he could feel Goku’s body tremble in a particularly
uncontrollable way. He was at the point of no return, and as Sanzo heard the
moans of longing fill his ears, he decided to push his lover over the edge.
With a bite on the shoulder he thrust as hard as he could into him, causing his
lover to shriek his name. The space between them was suddenly sticky with
climax, and in the heat of his own impending one it
only helped to encourage him.

Sanzo wondered if his own grip could cause bruises as he saw the skin beneath
his fingers turn white around the edges. Goku’s skin didn’t look right when it
was white, and it looked so out of place on his golden skin…

…but all of that didn’t matter at the moment. Goku, who was trying to recover,
was not ignorant of his lover’s condition. Much to the delight of Sanzo’s body,
he suddenly felt Goku constrict the muscles inside of him, causing a beautiful
tightening around his desire. Eyes sliding shut, Sanzo screamed as he felt
himself finally find the release he had been looking for.

For a moment neither man could move, so exhausted from the act that any sort of
physical excretion was out of the question. Their breathing was the only sound
that could be heard in the room now, minus the minute squeaks of the springs at
the motion of their heaving chests. It was strange… almost as if their world
had been muted partially. But very soon the world came back to them, and Sanzo
carefully pulled himself out, being wary of their extra sensitive tissue. He
fell to next to Goku on his side, and rolled flat on his back and closed his
eyes as he continued to catch his breath.

“Sanzo…” he heard a familiar whine, though strained by irregular breathing. It
was a very different sound than what he had been recently listening too, and he
simply grunted in response, deciding not to open his eyes yet.

“Sanzo, untie my other wrist…”

Opening his eyes, the blond turned his head to look back at the headboard.
Indeed. Goku’s other wrist was still bound by the gold ribbon. He smirked, and
pretended to go back to his original position. “Maybe you won’t move around so
much in your sleep at night if you are…”

“But Sanzo…!”

“Undo it yourself.”

Goku pulled against his bond in a futile fashion. Sanzo could hear the ribbon
hold even with his eyes closed. “You still have a hand free.”

“Already tried that.”

Shaking his head, the blond did his best to summon the remaining energy that he
had to look up at his handiwork from before. He didn’t know what the problem
was, once the knots were loosened enough, they slipped right out. Hadn’t Goku
learned that earlier that night?

The ribbon somehow slipped behind their bed as it came unwound from Goku’s
arms. Neither individual made an attempt to grab it. Sanzo made a note to have
Goku fetch it in the morning. After all, he wanted to know where something like
that would be in the future if they ever found a use for it again, which
was an idiotic suggestion because they definitely would.

Again there was silence, and the older man was content to just lie how they
were. But as his breathing relaxed and his mind cleared, he noted the scent of
wax to his side. Furrowing his eyebrows together, he was reminded that their
only light was the candle, and he was amazed that it had not gone out already.
Sitting up with much reluctance, he felt an arm circle around his waist, and he
looked down at the perpetrator.

“I’m not going anywhere, I’m just blowing out the
light.”

Goku didn’t listen and refused to let go, but gave him enough give to lean over
to blow it quickly out. The room plunged into darkness, and Sanzo slid back
into the young man’s arms, deciding for once not to make a snide remark to the
sleepy embrace. Sleep suddenly tugging at the corners of his mind, the blond
rested a hand against his lover’s chest and fell asleep.

-*-*-

There had been many ways he
could have awoken that morning. Many had been romantic notions that he had once
had in various daydreams, and a few actually were from past experiences. Living
in an apartment afforded little privacy, and more often than not one of them
would be awoken by some noise that their neighbors made. When one woke up it
often would eventually awaken the other, and then they’d both struggle to get
back to sleep.

This morning it hadn’t been by the kids next door making a lot of noise over
presents like Goku had expected, but by the alarm clock which they hated so
much. The timing was so predictable on it, they hadn’t
used their own alarm clock since their neighbors moved in six months ago. And even
if their neighbor’s bedroom was far from their own, it still sounded as if the
alarm was right next to their ears.

Goku winced as he shifted – trying to see if he could
possibly cover his ear so that the noise would not be as loud. In his
movement, he felt a twinge of pain in his backside. The more he shifted the
more it would hurt, and Goku didn’t want to move at all. It was a legitimate
excuse to do nothing at all. It wouldn’t work on Sanzo if he told him – the
blond had woken up many more mornings in his current state and dealt with it
than he had – so Goku enjoyed the repast while it lasted. Soon the alarm was
silenced as well.

Cracking an eye open, he looked over at his bed partner resting. He knew there
was no way that the blond would be asleep – he had yet to ever wake up before
him – but there were times when the man would attempt to go back asleep. His
face, while not as relaxed as when he would be in a deep sleep, still lacked
the tired lines that formed there during the day.

Goku loved to watch him in those moments. They had become so rare during the
past semester that sometimes he wondered if it was just his imagination. Even
if they would get a chance to be together on some evenings, one of them would
often have to get up early the next morning for work or an early class. It was
draining, but he had to admit that it made him appreciate these moments that
much more.

Looking down, Goku noticed that a hand was gently settled against his chest. It
was not his own, and he almost didn’t want to breathe in fear of it moving. For
Sanzo to have not moved it even when he was already awake…

A lock of hair particularly obscured the blond’s
closed eyelids, and Goku was tempted to brush it away. But
moving his arm to do so would shatter the mood.

Sanzo…

“If you’re going to say something, you should just say it,” the man said
suddenly, his eyes still closed. When Goku didn’t immediately respond, he
opened his eyes slowly to look at him. “If you don’t breathe you’re going to
pass out, idiot.”

“…not an idiot…” Goku smiled, feeling the tiredness in his expression, and
brought his hand to Sanzo’s brow to do what he wanted to earlier. He knew there
was no animosity behind the insult – there hadn’t been for years, and Goku had
rather grown to like it. Maybe it was a sign of some sort-of hidden masochistic
tendencies, but he didn’t think that was the reason. He just always knew that
Sanzo was acting the most like himself when he was being insulting.

His smile turning more into a grin, Goku moved closer to snuggle against his
lover. The hand on the blond’s forehead slid into the
silky hair, and Goku pulled him in for a “good morning” kiss. When he started
to get a response to it, he moved his hand down to the back of Sanzo’s neck,
and then to his shoulder blades. Remembering how he had held onto the man the
night before at about the same spot, he tentatively tried to avoid it. His grip
had indeed caused bruises, and Goku didn’t want to cause him any pain by
touching them. To distract him from it, the brunet nudged his thigh to brush
between his lover’s legs.

Sanzo, however, seemed to notice the action. But rather than voice any
disapproval he had about the marks he had received the night before, he simply
broke the kiss at the distraction provided for him. He looked down between
their bodies and smirked. “You’re a mess.”

Goku wanted to grimace at the way the sheets clung to his body. Yes, he was a
mess, but he knew that Sanzo had almost as much on him as Goku did. “So are
you,” he said matter-of-factly.

The blond didn’t seem like he wanted to say anything to that,
and in response Goku just let his hand move to the small of his lover’s back.
It was a full minute before either of them spoke again. “C’mon,” Sanzo said
authoritatively, “go take a shower.”

The younger man grinned wickedly as he pressed his hand into Sanzo’s back,
pushing them closer together. He shifted his leg so that it would be at a
better angle and smiled. “You need one too.”

Neither of them could deny the reaction that was resulting in Goku’s touches.
Scowling, Sanzo scoffed and looked away. “Brat.”

“C’mon Sanzo, we should really do our best to cut down on our water
bills…” he whispered suggestively.

The look on Sanzo’s face gave him the answer he was looking for.

-*-*-

Sanzo knew it had been a ploy to get him out of bed. It was a damn good excuse
too, except for the fact that he had forgotten that each time they had
attempted to “conserve” water, they ended up spending
more time in the shower than two individual showers that they could have taken.
But he had never regretted any of them – Goku made sure of that.

After a brief argument upon them coming out about who
would change the sheets on their bed, Sanzo found himself in the kitchen making
himself a cup of coffee. His reasoning had won in the end – Goku had been the
one to make the mess, and he therefore should be the one to clean it up. It
hadn’t really been an argument, though. Both of them were too relaxed after the
night before and their shower to really get mad at one another immediately.

The coffee maker signaled that it was done brewing his pot. Grabbing a mug from
the rack of clean dishes that he had recently washed, he walked over to fill it
up. He wanted the scalding-hot liquid in his body as soon as possible – the
tile of the kitchen felt like ice on his bare feet.

Goku had stolen his slippers when they got out of the shower. God, he’s been
such a brat recently…

Before he could even take a sip of his mug, he found himself yawning. A glance
of the clock told him why – it was too early in the morning for them to be up
on a holiday. If it wasn’t for that damn alarm clock of their neighbors, he
wouldn’t even be awake at all. He had no idea when both Goku and himself had gotten to bed the night before, but there was no
way they could have gotten a decent night’s sleep if they were up at this hour.

But none of that would matter once Goku was done making their bed. He’d come in
and drag Sanzo off to go open their presents. He’d wake up soon enough.

Not wanting to stand more than he had to, the man went to sit down at the
kitchen table. The chair had been how they left it from before, much to his
amusement. Sitting down in it, he set his coffee down and pulled out his pack
of cigarettes. A glance inside made him frown – he had
only one left. After withdrawing the cylinder, he crinkled up the empty box and
tossed it towards the trash can near the door. It bounced off the rim and into
the center of the entranceway.

“Che. Whatever.” He lit it with his lighter, which had
been left on the table, then tossed it to the side. Leaning back, he took a
drag and simply relaxed. It had been a long time since he had been able to sit
down comfortably the morning after, and he wanted to enjoy it.

Definitely something that should be repeated, he noted with a smirk. He
could get used to it.

His eyes drifted to the table, which was still covered in their mail from the
night before. He dismissed the bills and the cards, only to look at the
envelope.

The envelope. The stupid one that he
still hadn’t open.

Picking it up, he glared at it as if it were the source of his problems. In a
way, it was. He wouldn’t have had to deal with a moody Goku if he had never
applied there. But Goku had encouraged him to apply… he didn’t understand the
younger man sometimes.

It was driving him nuts. He knew what was inside there, but…

A rustle of paper alerted him to Goku’s presence. Looking up, he saw the brunet
pick up his discarded cigarette box and throw it in the trash. There was a look
in his eyes when their gazes met, and Sanzo couldn’t describe it. There was
pain at seeing the envelope, but there was something else.

It was almost as if Goku was letting him go.

The thought seemed to have shocked the man. Goku was never known for letting
anything go, especially things that really mattered to him. It was endearing,
but in many other ways it was annoying. Goku couldn’t get rid of him that easy.

“I have another piece of trash for you,” he said quickly, breaking the silence.
Goku looked startled, but walked over. He looked over the table for the trash
Sanzo was referring to, and the man seemed confused, since the envelopes that
the bills and cards had come in had already been thrown away. Sanzo simply
shook his head and held out the envelope in his hand.

“You need to be more careful when you sort. You know how much I hate to get
junk mail.”

The statement had left Goku speechless. His mouth was slightly opened as he
held it in his own hands. Sanzo simply took another drag of his cigarette.

“What are you waiting for? It’s junk mail. Tear it up.”

It didn’t matter what it said anymore. Not when it was confetti in their
trashcan. And Sanzo didn’t make any snide remarks for once when Goku had
promptly tackled him after throwing it away.

After all, junk mail could be deceiving. Especially when it
hadn’t been junk at first at all.

Sanzo snorted. So much for their ‘last’ Christmas together.
If he had anything to say about it, there would be many more. And Genjo Sanzo
always got his way.

An arm went to encircle the brunet and the other set his cigarette down. “Merry
Christmas, Goku,” he said with a small smile.

Goku’s face had been nestled in his chest, but his lover looked up and smiled –
one of his genuine smiles – back. “Merry Christmas, Sanzo.”

::Fin::
- 1
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Last Christmas