Care enough to Hate

BY : FriendlyFangirl88
Category: Death Note > General
Dragon prints: 1146
Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Whoever first said that red was the color of death knew what they were talking about. In his final moments, red was the only color Yagami Light could see. The red of blood, the blood his own, marking the way he had come. A trail of blood. Some would say it was the perfect visual metaphor for the last several years of his life; moving forward for a hopeless cause, leaving a trail of blood in his wake. Even now, in these final moments, his defeat finalized, Light disagreed profoundly with those who would say that.

A color besides red caught his eye. He looked. Pain gripped his chest, overwhelming him, taking all color with his fading existence. All he saw was red…with a single flash of black lit blue. The red vanished, darkness overwhelmed everything. Gradually, the pain eased, then vanished with the rest of the world. Everything was gone, he existed in nothingness. Wherever he was…there was only him. …and the flash of black lit in blue.


That voice…that maddeningly familiar voice. The voice that had never left him…

Eyes adjusted to darkness. Body adjusted to unreality. He was standing, surrounded by blackness; he could see nothing in any direction. Nothing but a figure as familiar as the voice slumped slightly and clothed in white cotton and blue denim. An old figure in a new way, lit purely in blue, the way he had so often visualized his rival. Obsidian hair shown blue, white shirt gave off blueish tinge. All he could see was blue…and surrounding black. Yet, he still knew red. He had, as he had so often visualized, become red.


The silence between them, as always, spoke volumes. Words had not yet been invented to describe the emotion they had for each other. Between loathing and longing, relief mingled with frustration at the others presence. An emotion reserved only for bitter rivals who faced one another once more after bringing about the others end.

“I’m glad to see you here.”

…it wasn’t a lie.

“I’m not.”

“Thus why I am glad to see you here.”

A surge of hatred, easy enough to understand. An attempt to keep his features schooled failed, for he no longer really had features. He had no real physical body, his soul was his body, and the hatred was clearly visible on the features of his soul. The other continued “Not only am I pleased you have been removed from the world, that your reign has come to an end but…” a hesitation. The complex, nameless emotion gave way in the blue-lit, equally nameless one. An expression of longing “I also would not have had you spend eternity elsewhere.”

“Why not?” His voice had returned to the maddened frenzy he had spent the hours prior to his death in.

“Because I hate you.”

…once more, it was not a lie. Light didn’t comprehend.

“Wouldn’t that mean you’d rather I be anywhere but with you?”

Unkempt hair slid over shoulders as the head it dangled from in tangles not even a lack of physical substance could smooth. “No…” he turned away. Light had always hated the sight of that crooked spine, and he found not even death had gotten his rival to admit slouching was bad for his back. Not enough to do anything about it anyway. It was a distracting thought, one he was pulled roughly back from by the end of that sentence. “I want to spend eternity with you, Light-kun…” a slight turn, the never-ending obsidian eyes were unchanged, still black as ever despite the blue light that enveloped the rest of him. “…because you’re the only person I’ve ever cared enough about to hate.”

Light was going to protest that that didn’t make sense. Then he thought about it, and understood. Slowly, he nodded. “yes…” he replied “yes, I suppose there’s no one else I would rather spend eternity with than the only person who has ever made me hate them.”

Pale lips were stretched, the corners of the mouth rising slightly in a genuine smile. “There’s no need for you to not know the name of that person anymore, Light-kun.”

Light’s heart pounded in his chest. Information…information was always power. Even here. Even with no physical body, no way to justify how he was suddenly able to sense the proximity of the other. No way to explain the warm tickle of too-sweet breath over his ear from the mouth of the man who hadn’t breathed in six years. The name…the information he had sought so long…the soft whisper filled his consciousness. “Lawliet.”



No rush of power. No satisfaction. No victory.

Information was worthless.

For a moment, there was rage.

Rage was also worthless.

As he’d lain dying, he’d thought his defeat had been finalized. Now he knew it had not been complete until this very moment. The moment when all the power he’d once had was completely gone. He’d killed his rival, sure. He had been proud of his plan to do so. Now, though, everything he’d needed to accomplish what, in the end, had done him little good, and had been voided. With one word, all his efforts from the beginning had been rendered completely worthless.

He simply stood there, defeated, unmoving. Unable to function. How long he stood like that was a mystery, and always would be. Time had no meaning in this place.

An object appeared in his hand. A glance down revealed it to be a tennis racket.

He looked up and saw his rival standing opposite familiar netting, a similar object in his hand. That hint of a smile remained, and, as a ball appeared in his hand, Light couldn’t help but return it.

Yes, there was indeed no better person one could spend eternity with than the only person one cared enough

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