Ryuk Masturbates

BY : Hammo
Category: Death Note > General
Dragon prints: 2164
Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note or it's charcaters and i do NOT make money on the fiction.

"Light? Light where are you?"

Ryuk came back from the kitchen to get some apples to find Light missing. He looked around somewhat surprised until he found a note left by light on the table. Ryuk picked it up and started reading:

"Ryuk,

Misa called and wanted me over immediately. I would appreciate it if you wouldn't follow me. I will be back in a couple hours.-L"

Ryuk laughed as he read this. He knew the only reason Light would ask him not to follow him when he goes to Misa's place was because he is going to fuck her. Though light hated her, he knew that Misa was an amazing fuck. That thought turned Ryuk on and filled him with glee.

"Oh yeah! Now it's MY turn to get off!" Ryuk ran downstairs and into the kitchen. from the drawers he took a steak knife, and butcher knife, and a cheese grater. He ran to tool shed and grabbed an whole tool box, a nail gun, and blow torch. He went into the shed and grabbed a pitchfork, shears, a broken lawnmower blade, and horse fertilizer.

Carrying all these items back to Light's room, he passed Sayu's room, light's little sister. Ryuk looked inside (happy that Light's parents and sister were out shopping) and grinned, deciding to do his deed in there. He looked around and saw there was a plug and enough room to put everything without them being cluttered. He closed the door and dimmed the lights while gripping his hard-on, still in his pants.

"Oh, this is gonna be fuuuuuun!" Ryuk striped off his clothes revealing a hairy spidery blue body. His ass was almost none existent and it had multiple dents and welts making the singer Seal's face looks smooth comparison. His chest was scrawny and you can see his ribs bulging out. His arms and legs were wrinkly and veiny, like a 80 year old man. He penis was small and purple. His testicles was almost black and none existent and it was covered with coarse hair. Any normal human man would laugh at the site of his penis but to Shinigami standards, Ryuk's package was packing. He was one of the only ones in the Shinigami realm who can get an erection and have a penis bigger then 3 inches. Hell, most female Shinigamis don't even have an vagina opening so Ryuk with his 4 1/3 dick was considered a monster in his realm.

"Now, what should I do first?" He served the floor and bed where the items were neatly placed. While he was walking around the room deciding what to first, he caught the sight of Sayu's pink satin lace panties on the top of a laundry basket by the door. "Oooo!" he ran over to them and slip the dirty panties on. They stunk of vaginal fluids and anal secretions. Ryuk walked in front of the mirror and inspected himself.

The sight of Ryuk in pink panties is enough to make most people hurl. But it aroused Ryuk greatly. He started swaying his hips and touching his nipples while seductively sticking his finger in his mouth, moaning.

"Oooooh oh oooooh! Shinigami bois, We're unforgettable!"

He turned and started shaking his flat ass at the mirror like one of thos black chicks in music videos. He turned back and winked at his reflection while he seductively grabbed his package.

"Ok, enough of that, time for some fun!" He turned and served the floor again. He grabbed the tool box and sat on the bed. Opening it, he found many different tools. The site of them made him heave with anticipation. He couldn't decide what to use first so he closed his eyes and just grabbed the first thing he touched. Pliers. He licked the tool lasciviously and then started to pinch his nipples with them. "Mmmmm" He slowly started to press on the plirers until it started to draw blood. Slowly he twisted the pliers almost 360 DeGeneres. Ryuk was curling his toes as he did this, Imagining Misa doing this to him.

"Mmmm, Misa...more." And then in one swift moment, he jerked at the pliers, ripping off his nipple in the prosece. "AHHHH, GOD! YEEEEEESSSSSSS" As soon as his nipple was off, he felt the urge to orgasm. He laid on the bed, scratching his chest and moaning. "Aww, YES! He it comes!!" But right at the peak, his obscene pain and pleasure started to reside. He sat up in frustration and touched his missing nipple...but it wasn't missing anymore. It was growing back! "Fuck!" Shinigami are nearly indestructible. Human weapons and tools can not harm them for long. In a matter of seconds a shinigami will regenerate itself.

"Dammit! I guess that's not the right tool!" He quickly reached into the toolbox and pulled out a screwdriver. Without giving it a second thought, he jammed the tool deep into his eyeball.

"Awww, YEAH! Misa deeper!" he wiggled the screwdriver deeper until 2/3 of the tool (including part of the handle) was in his socket, in his brain. He wiggled two fingers into his black hairy taint while slowly pulling out the screwdriver. Eye fluid and blood seeped out until is covered his blue, hairy, and scrawny chest. Ryuk slid his fingers out of his loose asshole and sucked on them, hungrily licking shity residue from under his nails. He then dipped his fingers into the blood and eye fluid, slipping them back into his ass.

"You like that, don't you Misa?" He took his free hand and started jerking off his small uncircumcised cock, using his blood as lube. Obviously, Ryuk liked pain but he didn't like cock burn so he preferred lubrication on his hands when he jerked off. He sped up his strokes, both on his dick and in his worn out black asshole. He lifted his legs up so he can get nice and deep into his bum.

"Misa, I'm cumming! UGH!" But once again his orgasm didn't peek as the wound he inflected to his eye healed. He took his hand off his duck and his other hand out of his ass and laid on the bed, very frustrated. "I wish I was human! Then maybe I can jerk-off like a normal man!" Then he started weeping. Ryuk is thousands years old and he needed new ways to get off after a couple hundred years or so. He is now resorting to self harm to get off but even now that isn't enough. Ryuk felt like he would explode with frustration. "Fine, if I can't get off, then I'll make it so I can never WANT to get off!"

He got up off Sayu's bed and ripped off the pink panties and ran to the steak knife. He got on his knees and very gently, grabbed his small testicles. With his thumb he gently pet them and sighed "Bye-bye, old pals." And in one fine swop, chopped then off. It went off like a piece of useless gristle from a nice steak. Ryuk stifled a scream and started hacking off his dick, his blood spraying out his erectile tissue onto his hands and onto the floor. With the last piece of skin attaching his body to his sad dick, Ryuk bent down and bit onto his penis and ripped it off with his razor sharp teeth.

Ryuk shaking from the worst pain he has ever experienced in his life straighten his body up and started to eat his penis like it was nice sausage. Its consistency was like sausage but it tasted like pepperoni (without the spicy part). Ryuk enjoyed teh taste of his penis and when he finally swallowed it, he licked all around his mouth lasciviously searching for any last bits that may be between his teeth. "That's delicious!"

Still shaking from unbearable pain, Ryuk grabbed the cheese grater and held it in front of the bloody stump that use to be his penis and sighed "Now, lets make sure my penis will never come back again!" And very violently he started grating his crouch. He couldn't take it no longer and started screaming as he continuously grated his cockstump until bits of his flesh and blood plopped down onto the floor, resembling menstrual clots. The pain was the worst Ryuk has ever felt but for some reason, he felt that he was going to cum again. Absent mindlessly he started bucking into the cheesegratter and then he came, seminal fluid spraying onto the grater, mixing in with the dark flesh and blood that covered the floor and Ryuks hands.

Ryuk fell onto his back and panted heavy. Though cutting off his penis and testicles and grating the stumps into a pulp was the worst pain Ryuk ever experienced in his life, He also simultaneously just experienced the best orgasm he has ever felt in his life. He has never been so satisfied.

"Wow....Ironic how the last orgasm I will ever have happen to be the best. I hope my cock and balls don't grow back." But just as he finished that sentence, he felt the pain quickly reside and groaning, he looked down to find his penis and testicle regenerating back! A deep rage broiled out of rage. A deep hatred of his Shinigami origin. But soon the rage changed into deep carnal lust for more pain. Ryuk got up and grabbed the first sharp object he can find, a lawn mower blade, and sliced his dick off in one swoop. He fell on his hands and knees and, shaking, bowed his head down.

"God, I am fucking sick" and grabbed the blow torch. He rolled on his back and aimed it at his cockstump and turned it on. He screamed as the fire charred his wound, producing smoke and an odor that smelled burning hair. As he kept the torch scorching his stump, he reached for his sliced off cock and shoved it into his mouth to muffle his screams. He sat up and turned the touch off and grabbed the nail gun and aimed it to his testicles. He put a three inch nail through each teste while screaming through his cockgag.

"AHHHHHHHH!!! YES! MISA!" And he blew another load right there. The fluid drizzling around a charred cockshump, producing smoke to rise from the wound. He reached and grabbed the bag of horse fertilizer and smeared it all over his body, making sure to get some into his mouth. He laid back and ate his cock with some of the horse shit mixed into his mouth. It was delicious. But once again, Ryuk's penis started to grow back and the nails through his balls started to slowly come out. Ryuk sat up and gave out a long satisfied sigh.

"That hit the spot! I guess my dick is here to stay!"

But his afterglow was interrupted by a bloodcurdling scream. Ryuk looked up and saw Sayu with the most horrified and contorted face he has ever seen. Luckily for him, she can not see him. BUT she can see all the tools sprayed across her floor, the blood, eye fluid, seminal fluid and horse shit that covered her flood and bed. Sayu ran away, screaming for her parents. Ryuk chuckled. "Looks like I've been caught!"

The End.


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