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Reviews for Tear You Apart

By : Duomi
  • From Dotowe on April 04, 2008
    Oooookay. Before I forget, GREAT CHAPTER! I loved that L was having a "sleepless night thinking party" and he covers all bases. It really clarifies where he is in his head. And...I smile and get all soft when I think about Light winning through in Kira's sleep and got really emotionally drawn when Light grabbed L's wrist. It was a very sweet moment.

    And then! I had a loooooong conversation with one of the smartest ment I know, coincidentally, my ex-fiancee (dun duhn duhn!), about your fic and ideas and what he thinks would logically happen and...I'm going to email you.

    Because, really, I hink our babbles would do better via email too. So, off to yahoo!

    Joie,
    Gloria
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  • From PlantangelJchan on April 03, 2008
    Yet another good chapter. Sometimes the short ones are necessary to take a small breather in between.I was actually toying with the notion of writing one of these soon yet I can't quite figure out how I wish to go about it.I don't beleive I would do the wealth of knowledge that seems to burst forth from the series justice if i were to write anyhting death note related and it would come out as nothing more than a massive stream of angst mixed with porn. Oh well I suppose for the time being I shall stick to simply rping it whenever possible....ohh I've just found some strawberry cake..I must go eat it now. I will review you again next chapter and cool picture by the way if you wish to see some of my own death note random art peices my account is
    vashkunthestampede
    Check it out if you wishbut I must go for now . keep it up I am rather enjoying this fanfiction. ^_^

    -L
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  • From ANON - Lila on April 02, 2008
    First off hope you recover from your cold soon ( T_T Not just because she wants the story to continue at a rapid pace simply wants the Author back in tip top condition...And second wants the story to continue as it has been :)...)Modern medicine has gotten better with treating the effects from colds. Anyway why i'm here in the first place to review the story first off yes the chapter was short but....i easily made up for the shortness by rereading it a few times and squeeling that i was reading thoughts that were in L's head...Yeah i know wierd but him dying in the series just blew my mind...I mean the writer's had to of known they made a mistake after so many people refused to continue with the series after his death....I mean i still only know about Near and MEllo and MAtt through Fanfiction and Youtube....Call me Childish but i only watched the series for L Light interaction and i through a fit when i saw that L had been Killed by Rem through Light's plotting....Okay i watched the last episode but that was only because i saw that L "came back" to see that Kira had been killed...Anyway back to the review...L's thoughts are just so on point..(Thinks about taking back the get well soon if Duomi write's this well sick)...And the part about his newly rebandaged thumb my heart went thumpthump my poor L...Figures i cringe more about a bitten thumb than when Light got shot up at the end......I love that L knows about Kira arguing with himself about L. I think he needed to know that he causes Kira some turmoil even in sleep...And then it got taken away because Kira got his Death note back *pouts*...I like were you mentioned his thought processes being a bit stunned with Kira getting the Death Note back and the issues he was having with staying...Might L realize that Love might be entering into the equation over his reason's for staying with Kira hmmm?...When Kira grabs L's wrist and rubs along the pulse point...i couldn't help the awww that came out that's just soo sweet....I loved this chapter ( Could it be because L was the main focus?)...( Yes and the interaction Between Raito and L was just sooo Kawaii!!!)...That's about it ummmm...Can't wait till next time XD.

    P.S I just found this Video on youtube that's just amazing i can't begin to describe how Lovely it is You must watch it if you haven't before just type in Death Note Points of Authority sadistic Raito and it should come up it's amazing so yeah...
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  • From Hellagoddess on April 02, 2008
    Woohoo! L! Nice to see his point of view once in a while. Don't apologise for the shortness, as long as you've updated it makes everyone happy! This is all really quite intriguing. I'm waiting on the edge of my seat for the moment when Raito tries to judge or do something with the Death Note. I really can't wait. Seriously. See my bitten nails! *waves bloody stumps of fingers, much to your evident horror* SEE THEM?!

    The sleepy Raito/Kira was very cute in a if-I-was-awake-right-now-I-would-be-plotting-your-death-but-it's-the-middle-of-the-night-and-I'm-really-mostly-still-half-asleep-so-let's-just-cuddle-a-bit-'kay?-*snuffles* kinda way. Even though it wasn't cuddling PER SE, just touching his wrist, but yeah, I could just really imagine what you wrote (sign of an excellent writer, which you of course are :P )

    Loved the picture too :p And In all honestly, I'd have to agree with him! There's absolutely nothing like a nice big piece of cake :D NOTHING!

    Keep it up! :D:D:D
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  • From ANON - Lady Gaia on April 02, 2008
    Yeah! We get to hear what L thinks! It sounds to me that if Kira won't let Light out then L will leave. Maybe Kira should let Light out and they can switch every now and then to keep L with them. I really hope that L and Light wins. I hate Near, Mello, and Matt, stupid L wannabe's. They should make a name for themselves than to steal L's name and all the hard work that he did. That's just taking credit for what L did, not for what they did. They have no chance of winning with L and Light working together. I hope you do go with my idea and have Light and L go on air and tell the world why Kira's doing this and what he wants. And don't forget to mention having a God of Death on his side. People are probably wondering how he's doing it and saying that a God of Death gave him the powers will win people over to them. Maybe they won't think that he's such a bad guy by doing this because he just wants the world to be in peace.
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  • From Kaiyuke on April 02, 2008
    Now that you mention it, the fact that L is a detective and tracks down criminals unrelentlessly may not be because he actually has a strong sense of justice like Light. Are you suggesting that perhaps the real reason as to why L decided to take upon the Kira case is not because he thinks that it is "wrong" for criminals to be dying but rather, it is because a single person has obtained too much power and is actually attempting to create a monarchy? (That and perhaps L was attracted to the fact that someone who equals his intelligence is working against him...?)

    Guu, *flails*
    Kira's character development is very interesting. Please write more! :D
    Hee hee hee.


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  • From animekid on March 31, 2008
    been reading the first part and scanning the second....

    man I love this story! One of the better what if death note goodie L/L stories...and it has Kira/L! Mmmm mmmm good!!

    Ahhh I gotta re read it over again, (since I'm scanning to not uber spoil it,) but it's still a great story.

    keep up the good work! I wonder if....Kira is going to use his dominace on L fufufufufuf.
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  • From ANON - Mewmew2 on March 30, 2008
    Thank you so much for posting a sequel to Goodnight Moon. It is just as well done as it's predecessor. Please continue with the good work when convenient.
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  • From sharingan on March 30, 2008
    I have to admit, I think it is impressive and intriguing that you basically let the plot run as it comes to you chapter by chapter rather than planning the entire story out thoroughly in advance. I wouldn't have guessed that, since both this story as well as its prequel are remarkably structured for something like that. Normally I like to try to guess at events and endings throughout the story to see if my theories are at all close to the author's, but if even the author hasn't got it entirely planned out, that gives it a feeling of unpredictability, which is actually a neat change from the norm (at least, provided the story continues to make sense and flow nicely, which I don't think there is any question that this one does).

    That aside, I loved Kira in this chapter. Extremely well characterized. The bit with Ryuk suddenly materializing and L's inability to see him was hilarious, especially with Kira suddenly talking to the air and the Death Note appearing out of nothingness, and L becoming alarmed by the situation. He seemed so dismayed when he found out Kira would continue to judge, and Kira's smugness, particularly the way he was obviously just toying with L, was great. Wow, I have no idea how L plans to cope with that, especially since he is still, at his core, so morally opposed to Kira's actions. I suspect drama and tension will ensue, and that always leads to good times.

    I do wonder, though, how the two of them will continue to travel, now that Light has been publicly exposed as Kira. I suppose this may call for some disguising. L also hasn't got Watari to run errands for him anymore, so if the two of them ever need to visit a nearby store or something, either Light--whose identity has been exposed--needs to venture out, or L needs to let Kira out of his sight. Or pay off someone else, I suppose. Although for the time being, they seem to be safe enough where they are at, but I'm sure they will need to keep moving in the end.

    It is also interesting now because there are a number of significant rivalries and conflicts occurring simultaneously: L versus Kira, L + Kira versus Near (and Mello), and Mello versus Near, not to mention any lesser conflicts that may arise later in regard to Soichirou (should he return - especially if his son is captured, because that would be an extremely interesting scene, assuming Souichirou is disarmed first), Matsuda, Aizawa, and Matt.

    I don't think that there is much doubt that L and Kira will be captured, or perhaps will turn themselves in for some specific reason, at some point in the future, because obviously the major arc between Near/Mello and L/Kira needs resolution, and it's unlikely to fall in L/Kira's favor. But on the other hand, if Kira is considered evil, then as long as the two oppose each other, L is still considered a protagonist, which really does make the situation very interesting. And I'm not sure there is a particularly realistic means for Kira to continue to judge forever, because he will always have opposition, and because it feels very unsatisfying and unbalanced somehow for the moral of the story to essentially come down to "Kira indiscriminately killed people and ultimately got away with it, the end." For me, endings are always the hardest part to handle gracefully. But I am getting far, far ahead of myself, as tends to happen.

    This is a lot of fun to follow along. :D
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  • From ANON - oztan on March 28, 2008
    I just read all of it. COme on L make you move.
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  • From Dotowe on March 28, 2008
    Ok. I know I left an insaaaanely long review just now, but I forgot something. (I know, I know, I'm soooorry for all the damn rambling.) But, hey, I think I know why everyone likes Matt. I was discussing this with the reknowned local Keeper here in Long Beach, Clarence. I think, and Clarence agrees, because he is Keeper and therefore agreeable (lol), that Matt is a favorite despite his short apprearance because he is relateable. Meaning, Light, L, Mello, Near, even, to some extent, Watari and Chief yagami, and even maybe Raye and Misora...they're all extraodinary. Yay for them. Yay for extraodinary characters. Right on. But, with Matt, its different. We all know a Matt. He's good with his hands, likes to screw around with tearing things down and building them back up, smart, witty, quiet, hot, loyal to a fault, and a small part of an overwhelming situation. And therefore, a trajic bit of collateral damage. When he died, it felt like your best friend died, or the kid down the street died, or the class clown that you would have definitely gone to prom with had he asked you died. He was, and is, the most normal, that is to say relateable character in the series. And that, I think, is why everyone loves Matt. We know him. He makes us feel like we're part ofthe story. And its too big for him just like its too big for us.

    So, that's all she wrote, lol.

    Joie,
    Gloria
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  • From Dotowe on March 28, 2008
    I'm so glad you updated today. I actually had to work from home, refusing to go outside because I feel so darn crappy with cramps and back aches. And this migraine is killing me. So your chapter was medicinal.

    Near. *sigh* I was prepared to hate him, I really was, before he showed up in the manga and then later in the anime. I was prepared to be weirded out by Mello and completely despise the last arch of the Death Note series. All, really, because I had been bracing myself for the rumored demise of L.

    But found I liked Near and adored Mello and thoroughly enjoyed the last arch; and if it won't bore you too much, I'll tell you why. I'll make it quick, i promise. Near, a child raised knowing that one day, he would have to live up to, and become better than, L, could be nothing but, in my mind, what he is. And what I admire about him, what I really, really, admire about him, is despite his logical deductions about how cold and calculating he must seem and be to be L's successor, and be one successfully, he still has absolutely no qualms about playing with toys and puzzles and twirling his hair, like a child his age would normally do. He sees no reason to be "adult-like" while cerebally surpassing everyone around him. I mean, that's effing incredible. I love that. And that first scene in this chapter, when Aixawa confronts Near, Near does his thing while playing with toys and even uses a lego to symbolize how he feels about useless people. In the anime, he did that with little action figures representing the factors in the case. How cool is that? And...I'm not certain that it's actually that Near is socially awkward, like L is, or that he is socially inept, I just really think Near finds absolutely no reason to be socially compatible. Sort of a "You think I'm being rude? Ok. Well, then you'll probably hate the fact that I don't give a shit." thing.

    Mello, well, Mello is just cool. Despite his weirdness and his ferocious personality and his bad hair and his chocolate addiction, there remains the fact that he was able to control pre-existing gangs and have them on their knees at the crook of his finger...before he was even twenty. There's...something to be said for that.

    So, you know, anyway, I just wanted to mention that because it really seems you're staying true to the essence of these characters despite the turn for the the different that you're doing with this story.

    And *laughs* i really have no idea what to expect. Who will win? What will Kira become? What happens next? There are no cliches and therefore no way to predict what is going to happen. And I have to say I'm loving that.

    And Ryuk. *rolls eyes* I still don't know how I feel about him. I've a strange fondness for the monster. And I have no idea why. I just do. Death Note or no, I'd like to put his weird ass on a leash and take him home as a new pet. I'd feed him apples and say "Go on, shinigami. Say something else." Because the monster amuses me to no end. So, I'm interested in what part he'll be playing in your story. I sort of leaned forward in my chair when you were narrating him and got all excited. And Kira has the Death Note again?! *shivers*

    ...But really, that's just me.

    Oh, and by the by, I'm obsessing a little over the new film. I've gone completely fangirl over it and laughed my ass off when you mentioned L's cuteness in the movies. You have no idea. I saw the trailer for L Change the world for the first time two nights ago and, I'm not exagerrating, I burst into tears. I called my friend up and nearly screamed "If you had 23 days left to live, what would you do, huh?! Well L is going to save the world one last time! Top that!" Oh yeah, complete puddle of fangirl goo, I am. *sigh* And the inevitable cuteness Ken'ichi Matsuyama is bringing to L's character in the new film is going to have me fangirly gooing for months. It's sad, i know, I know. But I just can't freaking help it. >_>Yeah, so I'm currently putting together an AMV tribute to L to Lenny Kravitz's I'll Be Waiting, the theme song for the film, and well, it might make some people cry if they're as fangirly gooey as I am when it comes to L.

    Ahem, so back to your review. I saw that you ha mentioned to someone about needing to outline your story and that you usually just play it by ear and write as it comes to you. While i would never technically advise against organizing your thoughts while writing, I will say that for some of the best stories I've written, they were done so by how you are writing yours. And you have already written some amazing stuff. So, do what works. I have one project which is the first of six installments and this project I know I MUST outline and organize and take speciall care while conceptualizing. However, I have another project I am writing specifically for the "write it as it comes" technique. I personally go a little mad if I get too organized, so this second project is my therapy when my first project is tying me into knots. Playing it by ear has been working for you in the past, so stick with what works. If there's something big coming up that you feel you need to organize or outline so you don't confuse yourself, then by all means, do that, but don't be too attached to what "good preparation for writing" looks like, because, really, stressing yourself out will seed a lack of inspiration. And for an avid reader of your works like myself, that's sort of a scary notion. :P

    And finally, I LOVED L's reaction to Ryuk. And that Ryuk thought L looked a little like a shinigami. Ha ha! That whole section had me grinning. Coincidence that L was eating apples during Ryuk's arrival? I think not. Anothwer brilliant chapter and I look forward to the next installment. Ah, look, the daily Moment of downtime is over. I can post this review now.

    Joie,
    Gloria
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  • From Hellagoddess on March 28, 2008
    No , No don't remove it! I LOVE IT! I had completely forgotten about it and then was just reading along and saw my name! I burst out laughing and just read that bit over and over, then, successfully under control, continued to read and realised there was MORE! Absolutely made my day :)

    I loved the casual way that Kira got the Note back, just basically putting his hand out and having Ryuuku place it in it. Brilliant and so...smooth. I could completely see L's reaction. Wonder what he's gonna do now? I wonder if he'll actually try to physically restrain Raito from writing in it or just have to watch while he judges. Hard decision. I, myself would love to put my hands all over young Raito... >.> *coughs*

    The tension between Near and the taskforce is well done too, Hopefully they'll all sort themselves out! All in all, loved the chapter! And thanks so much for mentioning me :) I just about busted my gut laughing when Raito was like 'I can't believe you even said that...', fantastic, loved it :) Keep up the awesome work - and don't fret about not having chapters written ahead of time! Everyone writes differently, and sorts it through in their own head differently too. It will all turn out all right in the end :P
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  • From PlantangelJchan on March 28, 2008
    I've finally decided to add a review after being mysterious till now as another hit in your counter. I find I rather enjoy this storyline you are very good with your wording and I enjoy reading every chapter you post. I am an L cosplayer and as such I tried to capture L's personality only to find out that I act like him on a daily basis anyway so i know what it's like tryingto relate to the characters without actually making yourself one. Writing it as just as difficult yet you manage to pull it off and make it look good. I applaud your hard work and writing skill ^_^. Just one little request...Can L and Kira have sex again it's just so hot when you write it and i quite miss it. Thanks and keep it coming.

    -L
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  • From ANON - Lila on March 28, 2008
    Yes i checked today and was very pleased to see the update so soon...As long as they keep coming...(teehee) i can't complain...I just don't know how to express my gratitude at how skilled you are at writing L and Kira they're just sooo....Them. (Just Applauds your ninja skill at writing)...Once again a lovely chapter. Poor Aizawa i probably would be a little homicidal with the casual dismissal of a family member being kidnapped as well...Hats off to him for not following through though...Guess he has more self control than i do cause lets just say (Cracks knuckles in the background)...Anyway yay Kira L interaction in this chapter *pouts* no lemony goodness but i can be patient L and Kira need to work somethings out before they can get groiny again...*Drools*...Ryuk comes back into play *Hooray*. He has got to be my Favorite Shinigami he is so freakin hilarious with his addiction. I can't help but chuckle everytime i see him. I also love how even though he gets so emotional about his apples or whatever he still remains detached from the whole situation and keeps his role basically down to an onlooker ONLY...*glares at REM*...Anyway this story is quickly becoming an adiction for me so yeah...I think i've rambled enough can't wait for the next installment XD
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