It Was Never A Love Story

BY : Evermist
Category: Death Note > General
Dragon prints: 2749
Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note, and I'm not making any money off this fic.

May 15 2005

"How've you been doing, Ryuuzaki?" Lori asked. The detective shrugged his shoulders, nibbling boredly at a banana. "Well, it's good to see you eating something healthy for once, so that's a start. Have you had any morning sickness lately?"

L fidgeted a bit in his chair. "No. I would much prefer to be working on the case with the others right now, Ms. Lori. You said I would not be requiring an ultrasound, so I must admit I am rather confused as to why you felt the need to pull me away from my work."

"It's just a check-up, Lawli," the brunette said with a chuckle. "You've been so intent on getting Kira profiled that I haven't managed to snag you away to make sure you're taking care of yourself for the baby. Now, when's the last time you had any morning sickness?"

"Two weeks ago." L bit into his banana, now looking even more annoyed at the fact that he was going to be forced to stay in the clinic against his will.

Lori nodded. "That sounds like a normal time for it to stop at, from the conception date you gave me. And your diet is seeing some improvement, but I just need to ask how much. Your glucose test results were rather high, you know."

The detective rubbed his toes together, taking another bite of his fruit.

"Come on, L. What have you eaten since getting up yesterday? You can tell me that, can't you?" Lori asked, patting L on the shoulder.

The detective sighed, and began rattling off his menu of choice. "One devil's food cake, four bowls of strawberries, two bananas, including this one, an onion, seventeen cups of tea, a half gallon of orange juice, two ice cream sundaes, and numerous candies and sugar cubes. All in all, probably only two hundred or so more calories than I normally intake."

Lori was quiet for a moment, looking at the detective in surprise. "Well...that was actually a bit better than I was expecting. You had a little fruit in there, but you will have to cut down on the cakes and sweets, child. An expecting mother needs to eat healthier than other people, and more than them, too. You already eat more than the average person, but the majority of your diet is empty carbohydrates and fat, whether your figure shows it or not. We need to cut out those carbs, and replace them with something that's actually good for you and the baby, especially taking your test results into account."

The detective frowned. "I am not a mother, Ms. Lori. Women are mothers. I am not a woman," he grumbled, shoving the last of his banana into his mouth.

"Lawliet, you may not be a woman, but you most certainly are going to be a mother," Lori snapped back. "If you don't want to use the title of 'mom', you don't have to, but I know you, and I know you're looking for any loophole you can get to keep on going the way you are. You need to change your diet, L, or you'll just be hurting yourself and your baby. Even if you do start eating better, I'm going to have to give you an insulin shot before I let you leave today. You've taken far too long to try and change your habits." The doctor turned to a cabinet, pulling out a needle and a small jar filled with a clear liquid. L watched warily as she sat them on the table that had been set up next to his chair, followed by a jar of cotton balls, another jar of liquid, and a thick rubber band. "Roll up a sleeve, and give me your arm."

L curled in on himself a bit, glaring at the table. "I don't like needles, Ms. Lori. You know that."

"Well, the needle wouldn't be necessary if you had just changed your diet when I told you to," Lori said with a small smile. She picked up the needle, inserted the tip into one of the bottles, and slowly filled it. "Now roll up your sleeve."


"Lawliet. Roll up. Your sleeve."

The detective narrowed his eyes at the doctor, flipped himself out of the chair, and took off running. He'd never liked needles, never taken one willingly, and never would.


Watari hummed to himself as he entered the elevator. The force had finally developed a profile on Kira and wanted to get L's input as soon as possible, so the old man was coming down to the clinic floor to find out how long his charge would be. A simple check-up should have been over nearly half an hour before, really.

The 'ding' of the elevator reaching its destination pulled the man from his thoughts, and the doors opened to what first seemed to be a quiet hallway. Within seconds, however, a black-haired man came peeling around a corner at the end of the hall, racing madly towards the elevator. He was nearly halfway down the hall when he saw Watari, and a woman came around the corner after him. "Stop him, Quillsh!"

L quickly threw on the brakes, trying to turn into an open doorway, but it was too late. Watari grabbed hold of him just below the armpit, swinging the detective back into the hall and holding him tightly, pressing the boy's back against his chest. L thrashed about for several seconds, glaring at his captor, before finally calming and going limp. Watari nearly dropped the sudden dead weight, pulling him back to his feet. Lori came up then, panting heavily. "I'm getting too old to be chasing you around, L," she sighed. "Now give me your arm, damn it."

Quillsh look down at L's right arm. The sleeve had been pulled up rather roughly, and a rubber band was haphazardly wrapped above his elbow. Ah. That explained why he'd been so late getting back to work. When L was a child, he'd been well known at the House for being able to evade capture for hours when a shot was involved.


Light glanced up at the sound of the door opening. Watari had gone off to find L a little bit ago, and the brunet smirked at the look on the detective’s face as he entered the room. He had a sucker in his mouth, both hands shoved deep in his pockets, and was positively glaring daggers at anyone who looked at him. "What's wrong with you, Ryuuzaki?"

"Nothing, Light-kun. Watari tells me you have some ideas on the identity of Kira. What are they?" L snipped.

"Well, we're pretty sure it's probably an older teen," Matsuda piped up.

"We think it's more likely that it's a boy," Aizawa interrupted. Matsuda looked a bit put out, but let the other man continue speaking. "We did take gender into consideration, but after reviewing what little evidence we have, most of us agree the probability of this Kira being a girl is fairly low."

"Most of us?" L asked, tilting his head a bit. "Who still believes Kira is a female?"

"I do."

L turned to look over at the couch. Matt was curled up at one end, GameBoy propped on the arm of the furniture, and looked fairly annoyed. "Why do you say that, Matt?" The teen shrugged, glaring at Light.

"He doesn't have a reason," Light said with a sigh. "He just keeps insisting that Kira's a girl, but doesn't have anything to back it up with. I think he's just trying to be irritating."

The detective crossed the room, crouching into place at the other end of the sofa. "Matt has a very keen intuition. He often finds it difficult to explain his theories at times, however, especially when the evidence is stacked against him. Over the years, however, I have never seen a time when his intuition is incorrect. In fact, he has helped me with cases I found rather challenging in the past simply by following his instinct. It is quite impressive, really.”

Matt’s cheeks flushed a bit. “Near and Mello helped you with cases, too, and they solved a lot more than I ever did,” he mumbled.

"That is simply because I gave them more chances than I did you. They both had occasions where they solved a case incorrectly, but you have always figured out what you have needed to." L turned to Light, motioning him over. "Would Light-kun be so kind as to bring me a bowl of strawberries and a bottle of hot sauce? The good kind, at the back of the refrigerator."

"So, are we just going to work on the assumption that Kira is a teenage girl simply because whoever this kid is thinks we should?" Aizawa asked, clearly not particularly sold on the idea.

"This 'kid' is smarter than you, your wife, and your dead grandma's ghost put together, jackass!" Matt growled.

Aizawa bristled at the insult, swiftly crossing the room and clearly about to hit the boy. "Why, you little-!"

L leapt from the couch, quickly dropping into a handstand and slamming one foot into Aizawa's chest, and the other into Matt's. The redhead had been halfway through rolling up his shirt sleeves, and was probably hoping to let off some of the anger he'd been keeping to himself out on the older man. "That is enough from the both of you," L sighed, lowering his feet to the floor. "You are acting like children. Aizawa-san, I trust Matt's instincts completely. This means that we will be acting under the belief that it is 99% likely that Kira is taking a female form this time. Matt, it was completely uncalled for to bring Aizawa-san's ancestors into your petty argument. Aizawa-san, coming to blows with a teenage boy over an insult made in anger is a highly immature action. I expect you both to apologize, and to do so before I lose my patience."

"Really, you two. You shouldn't be pulling L into your fight in his condition," Light said, walking back in from the kitchen. "The hot sauce in the fridge was practically empty, so I found this in the cupboard. Will it do?" he asked, handing the food over to L.

"I suppose," the detective responded after intensely studying the label, and opening the bottle to smell its contents. "Now, what do you two have to say to each other?" he asked, smothering a strawberry in the sauce and popping it into his mouth.

Aizawa's jaw clenched a bit. "I am sorry I tried to hit you, Matt, no matter how much of a little shit you were being to deserve it."

"And I'm sorry I insulted your family, even though it's definitely true," the teen spat out, picking his GameBoy up from the couch and storming off to his room.

"What a lovely little family the force is becoming," L said, the faintest hint of amusement twitching his lips. "Well, come on, everyone. Back to work."


I made it! Two days longer, and I would have gone a full month without updating. I hate when I do that. Grar.

Anyways. Where the hell did that come from, Matt and Aizawa?? I didn’t plan that out! They took over my fingers and did what they wanted to do. I quite liked it, though. :grin:

I feel silly now, cuz just this morning I told a reviewer that I didn’t know when I’d update, because my muse died for a while. Then today, I pulled out my laptop and the chapter just flowed out. Apparently, all my muse needed to get back in gear was to see L riding in a hot pink van with ‘Angel Crepes’ written on the side.

On that note, I order you all to go illegally download L: Change the WorLd now, so you can see how freaking hilarious it was so you’ll buy it properly when it’s on DVD. I know I will! That movie…agh. I went in expecting utter shit, and LOVED it. L’s so adorably awkward with the kids!

Plus, I got a picture taken of me giving Near bunny ears. ^.^ Wish I would’ve found the Mello we saw earlier, though, and gotten a picture with all three of the Whammy boys together…ah, well.

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