Music of My Soul

BY : ReadtoEscape
Category: Wei▀ Kreuz > Yaoi - Male/Male
Dragon prints: 1198
Disclaimer: I dont own Weiss kreuz, Ran, Yohji, or any of the guys. I write/post for my own enjoyment. No profit is made. Well, except the stress relief of writing it, & the warm fuzzies I get if you like it. But as those are intangibles,




Yohji watched, bemused, as Ran piled his *superdog* with topping after topping... chili, cheese, jalapenos, taco meat, chopped tomatoes, sour cream.... these liberally buried the *dog*. There was no way Ran could eat that, not without a fork and knife surely. Or a shovel.  Yohji prepared his own dog, some chili, cheese, a dash of mustard, and watched as Ran leaned down for a bite from his concoction. Ran’s face melted into bliss, a small moan escaping as his eyes closed. Yohji swallowed as Ran licked his lips and fingers clean of sour cream, eyes still closed, loosing another small moan of pleasure ‘mmmm’ in that deep voice.


‘Ran.’ Yohji croaked, cleared his throat and tried again. ‘Ran, let’s go over to the tables by the railing, hmm? He turned without looking at Ran again and made his way over to the high shaded tables near the railing. He took a sip of his Pepsi and steeled himself to watch Ran bliss out on the mounded mess of a hot dog, very determined not to bring to Ran’s attention how he looked. Yohji was enjoying  himself immensely this evening, window shopping with Ran at the various booths and shops set up along the boardwalk. He’d been entranced watching Ran at the knife shop. The man seemed to have a serious fetish for blades, an interesting tidbit Yohji stored away for future gift ideas. Yohji then lost himself in the blown glass display of the shop next door.  Yohji had a real thing for blown glass, the myriad colors and shapes, combined strength and delicacy of each piece.


Yohji smiled slightly to himself as the thought came to him of the similarity to Ran. He knew enough already to never, ever let Ran know he saw anything delicate or fragile in him. It was obvious Ran was all about disabusing any notions of him being fragile, but... Yohji thought he was..... at least inside, under the steel wrapper.....


The hours after he’d dropped Ran off Sunday night had been spent in imagining Ran in many various scenarios where Yohji got to show him just how fragile he could be, at least in the realm of touch.  Yohji wanted to be the one to see Ran shatter, explode, that first time. To watch Ran’s face when he was touched by a hand not his own, to watch his self control evaporate. It had taken Yohji quite some time to find sleep that night, and he’d awoken from a very pleasant dream of implementing some quite effective tactics to find a not so pleasant mess..... Yohji hadn’t woke up in such a state for a long time.


It unnerved him a bit just how deeply Ran had burrowed into him so very quickly. There was just something about Ran that called to Yohji. Made him want to protect him, and yet... at the same time, to see Ran stand for himself. Yohji knew, there was an intense strength there. To have endured as Ran had for so long, totally alone as he was. Yohji wasn’t sure he would have survived Asuka long without knowing the guys were there for him. Without drawing strength from the solid, secure friendships he’d surrounded himself with since his teen years. They had seen him through his parents’ deaths, which had been so hard, and then kept him sane after Asuka. How Ran had managed to practically raise Aya after their mother’s death at such a young tender age, with no emotional support from the bastard father of his, the man who should have been shielding Ran, loving him..... and then, with no confidants, no friendship to call on, to pal around with, to cut loose with as he grew up. Always having to be strong for his baby sister, never able to just let go.... and the past year, since she’d been hurt.... Not only no one to lean on, but to be threatened over his love for her, to have it used against him..... Yes, Ran was strong, had a steel will, but.... inside, yes... he was fragile. And Yohji wanted to be the one to both shield him, strengthen him, be his pillar, and the one to break him into a million pieces of quivering, oversensitive, passion ridden nerves calling his name as Ran fell apart in his arms ..... When Ran would say his name like that *Yes Yohji* in the car..... that *yes Yohji* still echoing in Yohji’s mind – it brought a shiver to his soul.  


And here, Ran obviously had no idea what he was doing with that look of ecstasy on his face, the moans of pleasure he was sounding as he devoured that damn hotdog. Yohji loved it. Ran had actually seemed happy, almost childlike in his excitement as he had spotted the vendor for the *Superdog* and practically dragged Yohji over. Yohji let himself smile as he watched Ran and the fire cooled in his groin. The desire banked as he took in the obvious happiness a stupid hotdog brought....


Finally, Ran neared the end of the dog, stopping to take a sip of his drink, a bit of chips. He seemed to catch on to Yohji’s rapt attention. ‘what?’ he asked, wary, swiping a hand over his face to check for left behind toppings. ‘What Yohji? Why are you looking at me like that?’


Yohji smiled. ‘I’ve never seen anyone enjoy a hotdog so much. You were like a man lost in the desert who found a barrel of water.’ Ran blinked, then finished off the last of his meal before replying. Finally, he looked up, a distant smile in his eyes, though not fully on his lips. ‘this was Aya’s favorite stand. We... we came by at least twice a week. I – I haven’t been to the boardwalk..... since....’ he sighed, ‘since she was injured. I  - I missed it I guess.’ He smiled then, fully, and Yohji was lost. The sunset shining off his hair, the smile putting a light in his eyes. Yohji was dazed as Ran went on. ‘this is wonderful Yohji. I always enjoyed the shops, the bustle, but.... since Aya.......... I haven’t let myself enjoy.... anything really. Thank you.’ Ran looked at Yohji intently for a brief moment, then looked down to finish his drink.


Yohji blinked, then smiled his warm, lazy smile. ‘Oh. No. Thank you, Ran. I haven’t come down here myself since I was in high school. I forgot how much I’d missed it. We should come down at least once a month. I told you I’d get to work on corrupting you, and if that hotdog is the first junkfood you’ve had in more than a year, then this place is definitely a hot spot on my list.’ He dropped his voice and husked. ‘besides, I’d pay almost anything to watch you at that superdog any chance I get Ran.... you have no idea Ran, really – no. idea.’


Ran blinked again, then blushed as he realized just how much he’d enjoyed his hot dog. ‘Yohji!’ he gasped. Then looked at Yohji slyly, a twinkle in his eye, and purred. ‘yes Yohji.’ Yohji gasped. ‘I’ll have hotdogs with you anytime.’


Yohji growled. ‘Ran.... you.... how did you pick up on that so damn fast?!’ he ran a hand through his hair ‘Ok. We’re done here. Let’s walk.’ He tempered the growl with a smile as he cleared the table. 


The walked along the boardwalk as sunset turned to night. They made their way down to the beach, away from the noise and bustle of the shoppers. Yohji spoke quietly into the night as Ran watched the stars. ‘favorite season Ran?’


Ran smiled, remembering the game. ‘Fall I think.’ He answered quietly. ‘as the oppressive season of summer gives way to the cooler days, the air turning just brisk, before the harshness of winter. Yes. Fall in New York is amazing.’ He looked to Yohji... ‘least favorite I’d say is the end of winter. It makes spring almost favorite, just to see the winter be over.’ He smiled softly at Yohji. ‘you Yohji? What’s your favorite?’


Yohji smiled. ‘Summer. I like the heat. Even here with this humidity. Good excuse for less clothing, tha’s my motto.’ He grinned. ‘ Really. I hate cold. Cold water. Cold winter. Cold weather. Snow’ he shuddered. ‘I cannot wait for Spring every year.. it’s very nice. But, when all chance of frost is finally gone and Summer is here in all it’s glory, I am very happy.’ He smiled a big, full smile and waggled his eyebrows. ‘I like Fall too, I mean the Summer can get stifling as the air thickens and the heat gets old before it’s over, but, overall, Summer is still my favorite. And, that obviously leave Winter as the least favorite.’


Yohji brought them to a stop below the wharf and reached down to remove his shoes, giving Ran a look. ‘ok Ran, shoes off. It’s another rule ya know. Like showing off your home. No shoes on the beach, at least for a little while. Gotta have the sand between the toes. Don’t burst my bubble Ran.’ he smiled, looking up at Ran.


Ran considered Yohji solemly for a bit before a grin broke out on his face and he kicked off his shoes. Again, that blissed out look on his face, head tilted back, he indulged in wiggling his toes in the cool sand. He cross his arms in front of himself, and eyes still closed murmured, ‘yes Yohji’ lowly.


Yohji shot upright from where he’d bent, and with a glance around, pulled Ran into his arms. Ran stumbled a bit, eyes closed, he’d been a little off guard. But, he’d hoped for this so wasn’t startled too badly. He let his arms entwine around Yohji’s neck quickly, twisting fingers into the hairs at the back of Yohji’s neck and opened his eyes. He deliberately looked into Yohji’s eyes and breathed, ‘yes Yohji. Yes’ leaning forward he claimed Yohji’s mouth. One hand dropped down to trail over Yohji’s back.


‘Ran.’ Yohji moaned and leaned deeper into the kiss, one hand on Ran’s neck, the other tightly around Ran’s waist. He pulled their bodies together and his knees almost buckled at the hardness between them.  ‘Ran’ Yohji whispered, tilting his head as Ran made his way to Yohji’s neck. ‘oh, Ran’ Yohji trembled with the effort to control himself. ‘wait Ran’ he forced out, ‘wait’ he focused and took a step back. Ran followed, a growl n his throat as he protested Yohji’s retreat. ‘Yohji’ he growled, then whispered, ‘Yohji ... please.’


Yohji almost exploded at the plea. ‘Ran!’ he gasped. ‘wait.’  He clamped his hands at either side of Ran’s face, forcing him to stop. He waited for Ran to focus. Those dazed eyes on his own. ‘Ran’ he spoke firmly, despite the shudder running through him. He took another step back. ‘Ran. not here.’


Ran’s eyes abruptly cleared, and he also stepped away, turning his back to Yohji. Taking a deep breath, then another, he whispered, ‘ god Yohji. I’m... I’m sorry.’


‘No Ran!’ Yohji couldn’t stop himself stepping up and pulling Ran back against his chest. ‘No, don’t be sorry, please don’t be sorry. I want you Ran. you have no idea how I want you. It took everything I had in me to stop. But...... we can’t .... not here.’


Ran took another deep breath and answered, ‘I’m not..... I’m not sorry for.... for wanting you..... just – I’m not......’ he sighed, ‘I’m not.... wanton Yohji, really, it’s – it’s you. You Yohji. I can’t.... I don’t....  You make me..... feel. I don’t want to resist you Yohji, and that scares me.,’ he whispered. ‘it does.’ He stepped away, setting himself to rights. He turned to look at Yohji squarely. ‘you.... you have some idea about the need for – for discretion..... we’ve talked, and ... yet.... I, I almost don’t care Yohji. And that scares me more than anything. It scares me how close I am to not caring , to throwing all discretion away...... to.....’ his voice trailed off and there he stood, straight, somber. He looked at Yohji, taking a breath, ‘I... I cant do that Yohji, I can’t. Aya..... she needs me.  She’s helpless. I can’t .... cant risk her. For, ... for this... for my own.... want. For.... anything.’ He closed his eyes and bowed his head.


Yohji ran his hands through his hair and lit a cigarette. ‘I know Ran, I know.’ He spoke clearly, quietly. ‘I feel it too. You’ve .... got to me... deeply. Already. I know we have to be careful, and I understand. About Aya.’ He sighed. One thing’s for sure....’ he turned to look out over the ocean. ‘You have to stop with the *yes Yohji* thing. At least in public.’ He turned back to Ran. Deep smoldering green eyes burning into Ran’s own. ‘I want you to say it Ran. I want to hear it. A lot. But, you’d better save it for more discreet places.’


‘Yes Yoh-’ Ran cut himself off ‘okay.’


‘mm-hmm, exactly’ Yohji chuckled. He finished his cigarette and pushed it into the sand. ‘Well, let’s walk back Ran. WEISS has an early meeting in the morning.  We’re setting up some weekend gigs up state.’  They started walking back toward the boardwalk and Yohji brushed his hand lightly against Ran’s. ‘I’d hold your hand if I could Ran.’


Ran sighed, ‘me too Yohji. Please, please know, any.... hesitation, has nothing to do with you... with us. It’s just my father Yohji. I can’t not see her, I can’t let him take her away.’


‘I know Babe, I know.’ Yohji rasped. ‘we’ll figure this out, somehow.’ He laughed lightly, ‘this is a good thing anyway. I’m enjoying getting to know you, hanging out. I’m not known for my ... restraint Ran.  I tend to take something if I want it, and work out the details later. This is good. We’ll take it slow. Anticipation heightens the experience.’ He smiled, a sexy, sultry smile at Ran, and reached up to swiftly trace his fingers over on side of Ran’s face, making as though wiping off something. ‘And damn Ran, am I anticipating.’ He smiled as they approached the cab station and he turned to Ran. ‘so.... until Sunday?’


Ran frowned. Five days. It seemed so long... he sighed, ‘yeah, I guess so.’ He pouted, just a bit, ‘Five days seems a long time Yohji.’ He looked at the sidewalk.


Yohji laughed, ‘oh, don’t I know it Ran. But,’ he leaned down to catch Ran’s eye. ‘you’re very busy the rest of this week you said, and WEISS is going upstate for the next few days. We can do this. And...we have cell phones Ran.’ he chuckled. ‘we’ll make like lovesick teens. I’ll call you in the evenings and when I have some downtime and we’ll talk and talk.’


He smiled as Ran’s eyes lit up, then frowned when Ran’s eyes twinkled with mischief.  Before he could ask Ran what brought that gleam to his eye, Ran leaned in, just slightly and answered in a whisper ‘yes Yohji’


‘Dammit Ran!’ Yohji barked and stepped back, smiling.  Ran laughed, actually laughed, and Yohji melted. Then he answered back, in his own sultry, deep husky voice, ‘yes ..... Ran.’ and was delighted with Ran’s wide eyed stupefied look, and the flush that crept over Ran’s face. Yohji chuckled, ‘uh-huh, see?’ he smirked.


Ran shook his head and glared at Yohji. ‘hmm.’ He sighed. ‘well that’s it then, for tonight.’ He held out a hand to shake, a very small smirk on his lips. ‘it was a nice visit Mr. Kudoh.’ Then he relented, the smirk gone, a flash of smolder in his eyes quickly squelched. ‘it was good Yohji.’ He shook Yohji’s hand and turned for a cab. He turned back just as he sat himself in the back. ‘call me. We’ll talk.’


Yohji watched as the cab pulled away. He shook his head, smiling as he climbed into his own cab. Yes. This was going to quite a ride......






Over the coming weeks, they enjoyed exploring each other. They grew more secure in their friendship, getting to know each other:



‘favorite sport Ran?’


‘none really, unless you count martial arts.’


‘no football? Ran!’


‘no kudoh, no football, though you feel free... That should leave some Sundays open this coming fall. hmm’


‘not funny Ran. Don’t worry, I can watch the game and still date you. We’ll just go to the sport’s bar.’






‘no. well, not... every week. Hmm. Friends watch football together.... completely acceptable... you can..... maybe you can come... to my place.... maybe... maybe I DO like football.’


‘oh yeah Baby’


‘wait. We cant.’


‘what? Why?’


‘well, don’t you need a big screen for football? I have a TV Yohji, but mostly just for the news, not a real priority...’


‘oh, don’t sweat that baby, we’ll go shopping.’


‘hmm...ok. So Yohji, jets or giants?’


‘do I strike you as a super speedy trip, or larger than life Ran?’


‘ah, giants then’





‘favorite color Yohji?’


‘well, it used to blue, but...... lately I’ve found myself partial to .. violet.’


‘Violet? Really?’


‘yeah, smoldering violet, Ran. and maybe.... deep, dark red too’






‘well, mine has always been forest green...... maybe now I know why.........’






‘favorite movies Ran?’


‘I like martial arts movies Yohji, Bruce Lee, Jet that. And, mystery. Movies that make you think. You?’


‘ah, yeah me too, and I’m a sucker for comedy, and.... well.... sometimes...... romances. Don’t laugh!’






‘favorite school subject Yohji?’




‘that’s not a subject Kudoh, that’s a break’


‘ok, music’


Sigh....’favorite academic subject then’


‘there were academics at school?  Kidding! Don’t hit me!’




‘well, math I guess. Math is kinda musical, doncha think?  And you don’t have to read much for math. I don’t mind a good book, but to have to write a report on it... thanks, but no. You?’




‘why am I NOT surprised.... so, favorite NON academic course?’


‘art, come on... did you really ask that?’


‘heh, yeah, I guess that WAS pretty obvious, hmm? – So, know any poetry then Ran?’


‘of course. Do you want me to recite poetry for you Yohji? Hm... that of others, or ...some of my own?’


‘you write poetry Ran? you know, I write songs, that counts as poetry too, huh? Actually, ....... don’t EVER tell anyone, but..... I write the occasional poetry myself Beautiful.....not just for WEISS...... Hmm, you know, I think I would absolutely like for you to recite poetry for me Ran, ..... panting  .... gasping .... verse.’


‘ch. Idiot’





Ran’s personality opened like a rose, layer by layer..... letting more and more of himself shine through as their trust and need for each other developed. Yohji was careful to keep their dates entirely public to encourage their *self control*. Never since Asuka had he been so glad to just talk with someone. Ran’s sense of humor blew him away, that witty, sarcastic, caustic humor surprising him over and over.  


They enjoyed the Aquarium, Ran’s eyes lighting up in wonder, as though..... he’d never been there before, as though seeing the sea life up close for the first time not on television.... They visited the museum, comments flying from them both - - the 40’s themed club, careful to dance alone or as a group, very careful not to get too close there -  - the arcade, watching Ran as he tried his hand at the various games. He was so out of touch with modern technology in gaming, not having let himself have this kind of fun.  But he learned the moves quickly, relishing victory.  Live theater - musicals, comedies (watching Ran laugh could make Yohji’s day), dramas, (seeing Ran choke up with emotion touched Yohji in a whole other way.) He yearned for the day when he could watch Ran lose himself to passion.....


One Tuesday night date, early in August, Yohji indulged a little fantasy, finally taking Ran to the movies. A foreign film, a small, mostly bookish or elderly audience, largely ignoring to two young men sitting in the corner of the back row.  Making out with Ran, making up for the lost time they’d spent apart recently..... and yet, making it so much...worse..... Yohji didn’t make that mistake again. Knowing he had to wait until they’d crossed a certain line before he dared sit with Ran so close in the dark again.


They talked on the phone endlessly. During the evenings, whenever either had to travel. Hours at a time sometimes.... Ran gave Yohji more of his life with Aya and Yohji came to care for her himself, too. Through Ran almost seeming as though he knew her, laughing at her antics, crying with Ran as he told of her need for affection, especially after their mother’s death.... Her obvious craving for Persia’s love, which he would not give... Yohji raged inside at the horrible man that was Ran’s father, at the disdain and outright contempt he showed to Ran, the casual way Ran spoke of the rejection, as though he deserved it, expected it. The way Persia had carried his hatred for Ran over to his wife and young daughter as Ran grew and his coloring became more pronounced. More obvious. Rejection becoming more vocal despite the love his daughter gave, and yearned for so desperately. Persia’s hatred toward Ran only grew through his life. His parentage constantly questioned by his own father, despite the proof of testing.  Constantly holding Ran forward as the cause for any strife in the home..... citing him as a freak, an aberration. As Ran’s sexual preference became known, it only grew worse, until finally Aya’s injury gave him an unbreakable hold, allowing him to bring Ran pain in yet more ways..... Ran’s reticence increased throughout his teen years.... small wonder that, given how he was mocked for any thought expressed, any opinion voiced.... He allowed himself to feel, respond, only for Aya. Apart from her, Ran was dead, emotionless, not allowing his father to have any weapon to use against him... not daring to show any feelings..... After Aya was hurt, he closed off completely... until Yohji.  Yohji delighted in finding ways to bring Ran into the open.




‘you need a nickname Ran..... a pet name...’


‘pet name Kudoh?.... I don’t think so’


‘oh yeah... something that is only mine.... let’s see.....’


‘Yohji, no... don’t be an idiot.’


‘I’m thinking Baby, hang on.....’


‘see? You have one already. I let you call me baby....’


‘let me?’


‘you’re still alive aren’t you? – amazingly enough...’


‘no........that’s not it, something else.....’


‘and.... you... you call me beautiful. All the time. Idiot, I keep telling you not to but.....’


‘no, no.... I mean something unique, something just between us. I call lots of people Baby, or beautiful or bishounen.’


‘excuse me?’


‘Um, well, I mean... I DID.... I DID call SOME people that... only certain people, and...I may still slip... sometimes.... I tease Schu, I call him Baby, sometimes.’




‘and, well..... I have been known to call Omi bishounen on more than one occasion.’




‘I want something that is yours Ran, only yours..... kitten?’


‘absolutely not.’


‘you’re very catlike Ran.... stoic, generally allowing interaction only if YOU instigate it.... and, petting you is fun’


‘forget it – no, ..... think of something else. Wait. Did I just say that?’


‘you DID. That means I can..... hmm - well I can’t call you orchid, even though it fits....’


‘Yohji, this is silly’


‘no.... let me think..... I know! Angel! That’s it..... Angel!’


‘Angel?! Ch! That is completely inappropriate.... I am in no way angelic.’


‘oh Baby, but you ARE’


‘really...... and how do you come up with that?’


‘well, an open Orchid sometimes looks like an Angel or wings, so there’s that.... and Angel, you take me straight to Heaven.... that voice that soothes my soul; that pearly, satiny skin, definitely Heaven to touch, and my repeated cries of *oh god, oh god* when I dream of you..... yep, definitely an Angel, MY Angel’




‘please Ran? I’ll just use it anyway.... be my Angel’


‘alright..... yes Yohji’








‘I want.... something for you too Yohji. But.....’




Sigh, ‘you know I’m not good at this Yohji.....’


‘it’s ok Babe, it’ll come to you, one day, it’ll just strike. Besides, I am POSITIVE I am the only one YOU call Babe or Koi’


‘oh really?’


‘well.... yeah..... right?....’


Laughter, ‘yes Yohji’




‘yes. Of course. The only one..... ever. Koi, Babe.’


‘that’s nice Ran.... Angel.’




Yohji gave more of himself too. He told Ran of his childhood, his lifelong friendship with Schuldig, how he met each member of WEISS and their respective roles :


Schuldig, Yohji’s best friend since childhood. Another half breed child in 4th grade, subject to the ridicule, name calling and degradation only fellow children can dish out, he and Yohji found in each other kindred spirits. Outcasts but each with a love of life and a fierce determination to prove everyone wrong, they had bonded quickly. Also having an accent, originally born in Germany, only moving to the States just before third grade started, his was decidedly more pronounced than Yohji’s who’d been born in New York and had an American mother. Schuldig was often harassed even more than Yohji. He learned quickly to *read* people very early. To know what people were thinking by mannerisms, facial expression, reactions to surroundings... a talent that would serve him well later in life. Schu had to endure his own share of pain and loss in his life. Orphaned very young, his parents having died during the summer between third and fourth grade, Schu’d lived in foster care. His parents having no relatives in the US, and none from Germany willing to take in the half breed child. Transferred from care home to care home through 4th – 8th grade,  some decent, many not so much, he’d been lucky enough to remain in the same general area, only moving away for a time during 7th and 8th grade. He and Yohji had stayed in touch, writing often, and luckily, Schu had found a stable, long term foster facility through his teen years, and had been able to attend high school with Yohji.


He’d been there before WEISS, had been the one to encourage Yohji to pursue music once his voice had settled to the warm sensuous tenor during the summer between sophomore and junior year. Had given Yohji constant encouragement as WEISS developed and grew from a hobby to a way of life. He often played pseudo manager for the band having a head for business and a keen sense for details. Often helping in negotiations etc, his ability to read others helped prevent deception, or taking advantage.....


Schuldig had his own *day job*now. Putting his brilliant mind and amazing *photographic* memory to use in high school, Schuldig had earned a scholarship to a nearby university, and during the freshman *career exploration* amazingly discovered a both a talent for, and a genuine love of teaching. His talent helped him to interact with young people in a way many teachers never could. Able to put them at ease and to engage their interest. He found he loved being able to touch young minds, to direct, guide, to see that light of understanding dawn. 


Schulding had been there with Yohji through growing up, discovering his bi nature, assuring Yohji he wasn’t a monster. Schu had the same tendency, though he leaned more toward men. They’d even dated for a time, but their friendship was too precious to risk and while it was very good, the passion was just not there, not the way each searched for. Their friendship had developed into brotherhood and Yohji relied on Schu as the only family he had left. He’d been there for Yohji through the loss of his parents, and the awful pain after his loss of Asuka. Had watched Yohji lose himself for a time after that, and had kept him from going completely off the deep end. He’d known the playboy image later was a front. Knew Yohji was searching for something real, and gave Yohji tentative approval for this new, mysterious relationship he was pursuing now... although he hadn’t met the allusive *Angel*.....


Schu himself was alone at this point in his life, not having pursued any serious relationships since Yohji, finding the majority of the college students too interested in only party party party. While fun for a time, Schu longed for something more stable after a time. He grew tired of one night stands, instant gratification, and opted to focus on his career for now. While he dated here and there, he was fulfilled with his students and side tutoring sessions and not in any hurry to settle down. Someday, if it happened, fine. For now, his friendship with Yohji and his students filled his life. WEISS had become his family as well and he found it to be enough.


Yohji described Omi, drummer of WEISS, as energetic, perpetually cheerful and deceptively innocent. Omi was a genius with a computer and sound and synthesizing equipment and handled the band’s equipment and electrics... He also was a model student throughout school. Being a master tactician, and having a steady hand, he championed in chess and both darts and archery. Being ever curious and always wanting to take care of those he called friend, Omi had also given his early approval of the subtle changes in Yohji, the new happiness and contentment he exuded.


Omi’s best friend, and WEISS lead guitarist, Ken, was a soccer fanatic with a bit of a temper at times. As a teen, he’d lost control of his temper a time or two, and the last time had been one too many, resulting in him being kicked from the team, and losing his best friend (or so he’d thought at the time) in the process. Unknown to Ken, Kase had deliberately provoked Ken’s temper for his own gain. Fully aware, as Ken’s “best friend” of his temper problems, Kase let him believe threats had been made by a certain player from the other playoff team in their bracket. Threats against Kase and Ken’s other teammates, to ensure a loss to end the playoffs. Seeing red when that player collided with Kase and Kase fell to the ground with a sharp cry, Ken had lost control of himself and in a viscous hit had taken out the other player, resulting in a broken leg. In the ensuing referee conference, mention was made of Ken’s obvious intent. When threats were mentioned to hold the team responsible as a whole, and eliminate them from the contention, Kase (thankfully found only to be shaken up, but somehow uninjured by the other player’s *hit* – surprise surprise) had betrayed Ken, saying Ken had a personal vendetta against the player, making threats to harm him at first chance, all for reasons unknown.... The rest of the team, having heard Ken’s vocal responses to Kase’s goading earlier, and oblivious to the manipulations, agreed with Kase’s implications, familiar with Ken’s temper from other incidents. Ken was removed from the team and banned from school sports. Accepting the wake up call for what it was, Ken channeled his aggression into music after that...


Meeting Omi at a music store early into Ken’s junior year, they found they shared common interests in music and a desire to play professionally someday. It took Ken a while, to trust again, but..... once a friend Ken was fiercely loyal and protective, and basically unable to resist any real pleas.... As their friendship grew, Omi, a year younger than Ken, made good work of the puppy dog eyes angle, and came to convince Ken to host weekly, at least, jam sessions in his garage, as his father’s penthouse apartment did not lend itself to *band sessions*  They practiced together often in Ken’s garage, making it their *mission room*.


In a twist of fate smiling for once, Ken lived only a short distance down the street from Yohji. On one of his evening walks with Schu to talk over the most recent love interests for both, and the question of whether to attend the junior prom or just create their own party, they’d overheard the practice session. Ken’s ability with a guitar was nothing short of amazing. Ken had developed a glove allowing him to utilize multiple picks at once, almost as though the picks were a part of his hand, like claws perhaps. Ken tended to lose himself in his solos, sometimes requiring intervention to come back to this existence. He likened it to a berseker warrior, one who lost himself to the fight. Ken lost himself to the music.....


Yohji had been unable to resist the music that called to him from down the street that night during their jam session and had found himself standing just outside Ken’s garage singing along with the popular hit they were practicing. A fast friendship was formed between the three, despite Omi being a year behind, and soon the plan to form a band was underway.


Jei, WEISS’s last member and bassist, had also had problems with temper as a young man, but sadly with more reason than merely overloads of testosterone..... Yohji’d met Jei, also a junior, near the school earlier in the year. He came upon a group of teens on the tennis court taunting a lone boy. White haired, thin, but with a whipcord strength, sporting a patch over one eye, the boy eyed the group warily, but showed no signs of fear as he held a fighting stance enduring their taunts. Finally, one comment had apparently hit home, something about one eyed freak and your mother- pushing the boy over the edge he’d been holding on to so tightly.


Yohji had witnessed Jei’s temper unleashed. He’d intervened, and been able to calm the youth before the others were seriously hurt. He’d given witness to the security responding to the fight, to the fact that Jei had been outnumbered, obviously acting in self defense..... The bruises revealed when the youth’s torn shirt was cut away led credence to the story. The bruised ribs and marks across Jei’s back resulted in no charges being brought, and Jei was released. But. Yohji’d been there. He knew. None of the hecklers had landed more than a glancing blow. Yohji’d said nothing until he and Jei were released that afternoon, and that silence earned him a measure of trust. Walking home, he’d learned of Jei’s drunken, violent father, his mother’s *death* ruled suicide when he was in middle school.... of the beatings, and worse... of how Jei’d lost his eye....


A friendship had grown. Jei, like Ken, channeled his anger, his *darkness* into music, playing bass. When Yohji found Omi and Ken, he immediately thought of Jei and WEISS came into being.  Later, when Jei was finally old enough to move out, they’d become roommates first. Finally, as Ken and Omi grew old enough to leave home as well, for the convenience of the band, the four shared a home while Schu pursued University.


Each of these men were Yohji’s family, and someday, Yohji hoped, would be Ran’s as well.




Ran blossomed under Yohji’s care as his trust in Yohji grew, as Yohji seemed to not only accept, but to revel in exploring what Ran considered his defectiveness: his looks, his reticence, his lack of experience in both friendships and romance, his difficulty with expression. Yohji seemed to thrive on bringing Ran out, in opening each layer, excited to penetrate yet more.....


And the sensory explorations progressed as well......... occasional touches in the limo enroute to or from a date, the privacy panel securely closed. Stolen kisses at least once on each date when they found some time alone, each consecutive session flaming the passion higher between them....


Yohji encouraged more ‘discussion’ of this aspect of their growing relationship too. Ran balked at first, easily embarrassed to talk about it. Touch was one thing, putting desire into words.... something else again. He tended to cut conversation short if Yohji pushed too far..... what Yohji wouldn’t give to erase that fear, embarrassment..... baby steps.


It was a Thursday night and WEISS was on the road for another extended weekend gig. They were getting more of those, but they often led to traveling. Upstate, or out of state, like this one, gone from Thursday through Sunday. Meaning, he wouldn’t see Ran again this weekend, not until Tuesday. And Saturday... Saturday was Yohji’s birthday..... Yohji groaned as he yet again tried to shake Ran from his thoughts as he considered what he wanted to ask for as a gift...... Oh fuck it, he dialed Ran’s number. No way he’d get to sleep without the voice of his Angel to soothe the way..... already, he was addicted..... needing Ran.





Ran sighed as he sipped his lemonade, standing on his balcony enjoying the view, basking in the bright summer sunlight of a Saturday afternoon. The warm sunlight soothing him, making him think of Yohji. Yohji was warm, he filled Ran with light, kept the darkness at bay..... suddenly, it hit Ran just how much Yohji WAS like sunlight. He grinned as he considered Yohji’s response when he told him he’d found a pet name for him.... he could give it to Yohji for a birthday surprise.


He missed Yohji. Missed him more than he should. But, he was coming to understand that Yohji meant much more to Ran’s well being than should be possible only two and a half months later. It had been a very, very long week. Meeting after meeting, finalizing all the quirks of another new contract with Mamaru.... the boy was quite the sensation, and renegotiation was needed to give Krittiker a better hold on the global market. The problem was, the kid had let things go to his head and was turning into quite the diva. Wanting a personal assistant on hold during recording sessions, his own favorites catered in whenever he was scheduled somewhere, and most recently, a tendency to make *fashionably late* appearances to media events and rehearsal or studio sessions. The problem was, the musicians working the studio for the past few years were accustomed to Ran’s demand for professionalism and punctuality, conveying one’s respect, or lack thereof, of another. Ran was pretty sure he had at least cured the boy of the problems at the studio. A well focused glare and some explanation as to how easily one’s childish tendencies could become media fodder seemed to have made an impression. It had taken most of the afternoon to smooth over the feathers of the studio crew and Ran had developed a tiresome headache by the end of the day Friday. One that almost prevented him from stopping by the boardwalk on his way home. Almost. But he’d been too eager to pick up Yohji’s gift, and on the off chance he got to come back early, Ran wanted to have it available. Of course, he hadn’t. And the piece sat wrapped, waiting, on Ran’s coffee table. Ran sighed and rolled his shoulders. Yes, he missed Yohji.


Ran had commissioned a beautiful piece. A delicate, white orchid, with a blood red center, and violet spattered petals, laying on a bed of deep emerald green leaves. The orchid was enmeshed in honey gold coils, thin as wire, giving it an unearthly aspect. As though it were a dream, a thought..... If one looked very, very closely, at the center of the orchid, one could see that there was an angel, standing with head tilted back, arms and wings spread wide, these and the white robe he wore blending eventually up into the petals of the orchid. The angel’s hair was a deep, dark, blood red, just at the center of the orchid, and flowed, long and wavy, to begin the red coloration expanding from the orchid’s center, deepening in hue as it went, until it changed to a violet dusting spattered along the center of the orchid’s petals. Ran couldn’t wait to give the piece to Yohji. It was...... exquisite, truly. The glassmaster had quite outdone himself. It was worth every penny.... It was.... over the top. And the symbolism of the angel/orchid being encased in the honey and emerald would not be lost on Yohji. It said much, asked for much, but Ran would give it to Yohji, and accept whatever Yohji was willing to make of it.


Today was Yohji’s birthday. Ran so wished WEISS had not been scheduled away today.... They’d agreed that, since Ran had needed to attend a conference this morning, and it would take most of the day to get to the band location, Ran would not attend today’s show. Especially as the band intended to travel back tonight after the gig to negate the extra hotel expense He’d promised Yohji he would make WEISS’ next show here in New York, at whatever venue they scheduled. But, that meant, today he would not see Yohji. Couldn’t even call him, as he had no way of knowing what photo sessions or autograph events, etc they might be engaged in....


Ran smiled to himself as he recalled talking with Yohji late into the early morning hours Thursday night. They’d talked of inanity at first, light conversation about nothing really. Yohji saying he’d missed Ran’s voice so called for a chat. Yohji’d described the drive up, the antics of his bandmates. His horror at the excuse for Mexican food served at the restaurant they’d stopped at on the way. Ran had laughed at Omi’s excitement at spotting an eagle in flight, forcing them to pull off to the side while he frantically tried to find his camera..... 


Then, somehow, the conversation had turned. From silly nonsense conversation to more serious. Yohji’d talked about his parents. About missing them as his birthday approached. He’d described to Ran how they’d met in Japan while his mom was stationed there during a brief stint in the military. How they’d courted, fallen in love, and how, once she was transferred back, his father couldn’t bear to be apart from her. How his father had no family, having been orphaned young, being an only child. He’d had no qualms about following the love of his life to America. He’d sold everything, and come to New York. Yohji’d explained how his mother’s parents had had her at an older age. How both were older by the time she’d found Tatske Kudoh, needing her care.  Her mom had died shortly after Yohji was born. He’d never really known his grandmother. But his grandfather was lost without his beloved Susan and he’d needed Yohji’s mom.  Yohji’s father had never considered asking her to leave him behind, and Yohji’d grown up with his grandfather an integral part of this life, living in their home until his death.  His wry sense of humor had influenced Yohji’s own, and he cherished the memories of this man who’d immediately accepted his daughter’s love without reservation to race or differences. Happy that she’d found the same amazing soulmate he’d had with his wife. He’d accepted Tatske as a son, and loved him and Yohji completely. Yohji’d been devastated when Frank had died when he was twelve.


Ran opened up to Yohji more about the lack of any family other than Aya after his mother’s death. The ridicule endured as a small boy unable to be understood for a time. Much like Schuldig, Ran’s family had moved to New York while he was young. His difficulty with his accent had caused him trouble at school at first, increasing the tauntings over his coloring, his almost feminine appearance, especially until his voice changed, deepened. Aya had learned English without much accent, most of her learning to speak coming after the move. And, being adorable and loving, not to mention blending in without a problem, she was accepted and loved by all but her own father. Thanks to his father’s disdain, Ran had been withdrawn to begin with, becoming more antisocial after the death of his mother, awkward, uncaring of other’s impression, wanting only to be left alone. Finally, his father had resorted to private tutors, only increasing the aloofness now that Ran was not forced to interact. He’d poured himself into his studies, intent on perfecting his English, he’d always understood it with no trouble, now he spoke it perfectly as well. None would suspect his early conflict. He was still obviously Japanese in his facial features, his body style, lanky, lean, with delicious muscle definition reinforced by his ongoing kendo practice. No, despite the coloring, the alabaster skin, the blood red hair, violet eyes, none would question his Japanese heritage. But now, in modern day New York, as an adult, especially in the music industry, he was no longer taunted for his unique appearance. In fact, now the interest took on a whole new aspect. His aloofness when in public gave Ran a reputation as *ice prince* *frigid* and he’d had several offers to melt the ice, to thaw him out.  But, he’d had no such desire or need, until Yohji.


Somehow, this confession had caused the conversation to graduate then to light flirting, teasing, which quickly turned to more. Ran had grown flustered, unable to respond to Yohji’s comments, and had cut the conversation short, citing a need for rest for an early meeting Friday....  he wished now that he hadn’t been so tongue tied, that he’d let Yohji continue his oh so pleasant descriptions....


The people at Ran’s office Friday had been stunned at Ran’s attitude that morning. The half smile that kept coming back, the lack of anger just below the surface. People kept reacting to him with mild shock until the annoyance burned away the last of the good mood finally when the mail clerk entered his office shortly after eleven am with a look of confused anticipation on his face. Like he was entering the freak show tent at the circus, Ran thought. ‘what?!’ he hissed at the young man, ‘you’d think I’d never smiled before.’ Ran had growled at the kid, then blinked when the boy blurted without thinking, ‘you haven’t’  the boy had slapped his hand quickly over his mouth, obviously expecting a reprimand or worse, again shocked when Ran only answered quietly, almost sadly, ‘perhaps you’re right. Leave the mail and get out.’ Ran had finished the desk work in his office then headed off for the talk with the new diva brat and the studio crew, ignoring his phone and secretary the rest of the day.


Ran rubbed his eyes and took a deep sigh. Tina was a great secretary. She put up with all his quirks, took his attitude with a grain of salt. Knew his preferences and often anticipated his needs. She seemed to have come to care for him in her way over the last three years, despite his having done nothing to encourage it. He’d have to do something to make up to her for his attitude this week. Between the kid, dealing with Persia’s worsening disdain, worry for Aya and missing Yohji, Ran had been a real grouch since Tuesday. She’d been pleasantly surprised at his countenance Friday morning, making no shocked or amazed comment, just smiling at him fondly and saying she hoped he was alright, how he looked tired but happy, and brought him his coffee just how he liked it without any hint from him.... she hadn’t deserved his cold shoulder Friday afternoon... he’d have to make it up to her somehow......


Ran’s musings were cut short as he heard his phone ring from inside. Making his way into the apartment, Ran pulled the curtains, deciding he’d had enough sun and heat for one Summer afternoon, and flipped on the fan as he walked by. Picking up the phone, not recognizing the number, he answered cautiously. ‘This is Ran.’


‘Angel.’ Yohji’s warm voice, never failing to fill Ran with light, greeted him. ‘I miss you Baby’


‘Yohji’ Ran breathed. ‘Happy birthday Yohji, I’m so glad you called.’ Puzzled, he asked, ‘what happened to your cell Yohji? What number is this?’


‘Oh yeah? Miss me huh?’ one could hear the smirk on Yohji’s lips as he purred, ‘that’s good Angel. I’m glad you’ve been missing me. This is the phone in my hotel room. My charger broke and I just got a new one. Cell is charging now for the trip home. I miss you too.... very very much Ran. And... since you’re missing me too, you are more likely to give in to my request.’


‘What request is that Yohji?’


‘uh-uh, not yet. First, did you get that prick kid straightened out? I know Thursday you were pretty fed up.’


Sigh, ‘yeah. I put the brat in his place. He wont be late to another session with me or my people. What he does with others is none of my concern. But, I don’t want to discuss anything to do with Krittiker. It’s your birthday, I want to talk about you. Did you have a nice day so far? How much time do you have until tonight’s show? I – I have your present Yohji, I can’t wait to see you open it. I wish I could have given it to you today. Maybe, if you get back early enough Sunday, we can see each other.’ Ran dropped his voice, ‘I do miss you Yohji..... I couldn’t sleep at all Thursday after your call.’


Yohji’s breath hissed on the other end of the line. ‘Ran. me either. I tossed and turned all night. It’s funny. I’d called you because I couldn’t sleep, I needed to hear your voice. Then I can’t stop talking to you..... We really are like a couple of teenagers with their first love you know.’


Ran could hear Yohji’ smile in his voice. Not the leering grin, the fond, warm smile that Ran had grown to understand was only for him. The one that made Ran melt, made him want to wrap Yohji in his arms and kiss him breathless.


‘and then Ran, the rest of the conversation completely chased sleep away. Totally defeated the purpose, especially since you cut the call off Ran before we got the end of the story. Well, it surely wasn’t much for a sleep remedy.’


‘Yohji, I -’


‘don’t you dare apologize Ran. I told you already, only what you are comfortable with, only what makes you feel good.’


‘Yohji. You DO make me feel good, talking to you like that is..... amazing, it’s just-‘


‘I know Angel. It’s hard for you, but.... Ran, I want to tell you, describe to you all the amazing things I want to do someday. And this.... this can be a prelude.... Ran, I don’t want to wait much longer. The.... anticipation is growing  and soon..... but for now, let me do this Ran. This is my request. For my birthday’ Yohji’s voice dropped to a rasp, breathless as he went on, ‘give me your pleasure. That’s what I want. Let me make you cum Ran, let me tell you, hear you. Let me cum with you.’


Ran’s gasp was followed immediately by a helpless moan. ‘Yohji.... yes Yohji.’ Ran’s heart was pounding, leaping to life in his chest....


‘oh Angel. Thank you. I’m so hard from wanting you Ran, I- OK. Lay down for me Ran, lay down and relax, what are you wearing Ran? give me a picture to work with.’


‘I... I’m wearing a button down white shirt and black drawstring pants Yohji. Nothing special..... o-ok Yohji, I’m.... I’m in my room, on .. on the bed.’


‘yes Ran... yes. God I miss you....’ sigh, ‘for the first time Ran, I almost resent WEISS. Not, not the guys, but.... well. I’m glad we’re growing, gaining success, but..... I wish we didn’t travel so much. It didn’t matter before, but now. I have you, and I can’t take you with me, and .... I want to Ran. I want you to be with me on the road, in the audience, here.... in my room.... where I can touch you. Ran,’ Yohji was beginning to pant, just a little as he anticipated the coming moments, ‘Ran.... I want to touch you.... run my hands all over your body, feel your muscle under my palms, your smooth skin, your firm, toned pecs and abs.... but I’m not with you Ran. You’ll have to help me. Will you? For my birthday Ran, will you be my hands?’ he dropped to a whisper, ‘touch yourself for me Ran, be my hands.  And Ran, I.... I can’t see you, you have to let me hear you. Please Ran.’ This last was a breathless moan from deep in Yohji’s throat.


Ran was glass hard laying there listening to Yohji, and he hadn’t really even said anything yet. Ran was helpless to answer Yohji’s plea, ‘yes Yohji, please’ he moaned deeply, surprising himself. And Yohji too, by the sound of the gasp of his name in response to that yes. He said it again, just to hear the effect on Yohji. ‘yes Yohji.... I .... I want you Yohji. Tell me.... tell me what to do.’


‘Ran, damn! Ok.  Lay back. Relax.  Close your eyes, imagine me there, with you. Running my hands over your torso, down your sides. Be my hands Ran. Open your shirt, trace my hands over your chest, over your abs.... run my hands down your thighs Ran, over the inside of your thighs. Feel the heat Ran, through your soft pants. Ran, gods, are you as hard as I am?’


‘yes Yohji!’ Ran gasped, arching just slightly as he grew impossibly harder at Yohji’s question.


‘good Ran, that’s good. Gods Angel, so am I..... Take my hand Ran, use it to cup yourself, squeeze a little.’


Ran moaned deeply, a wordless expression of his pleasure as his hand wrapped around himself through his pants. He was slightly embarrassed to realize here he was, broad daylight, touching himself as Yohji listened, but soon the pulsing pushed any hesitation away. He fumbled with the drawstring on his waistband as he suddenly needed to touch himself. Needed it in a way he never had before.... ‘Yohji’ he groaned, ‘Yohji.... I ....’ he whimpered as he trailed off, unsure what to ask for, but needed it so desperately.


‘Ran’ Yohji moaned back, ‘Angel, god..... I ..... I wish I was there Ran, how I wish I could see you. Are you holding your cock, Ran? is it hard, hot?  Mine is Ran, so hard it hurts Ran.’ Yohji was panting now, Ran could hear the sound as his shoulders shifted on the sheets. He knew Yohji was pumping himself and that image strove to almost push Ran over. He had a brief thought that he wished he could imagine Yohji like that naked, rather than in jeans in his mind’s eye, but they hadn’t progressed past heavy petting and so he could only picture Yohji shirtless, no more than that, but that was enough.


‘you’re so beautiful Yohji.’ Ran heard Yohji’s sharp intake of breath at his initiative. This was Yohji’s birthday... he could do this. Yohji wanted this. There would be no ridicule, no pain. Ran’s resolve hardened and he began to speak. ‘you – are. Yohji, - I am - hard Yohji – so – so hard.’ He heard Yohji moan his name, ‘yes Ran, Angel....ngh, ahh...’


‘You – you did – did this - to me Yohji.’ Ran was panting, moaning Yohji’s name, pumping faster, his breathing getting faster and faster, he knew, this was not going to last much longer. ‘Yohji, I ... ngh,  yo..ji .. yo-‘


‘Ran, yes! Cum for me Ran, cum for me, calling my name, Ran.... oh! Damn!’ suddenly, Yohji gasped, then, ‘uh – R – Ran.’ Yohji’s voice, a drawn out growl and Ran knew, Yohji had cum just then, and saying Ran’s name.


The image, fuzzy though it was from lack of personal knowledge, was enough to push Ran himself into oblivion. His entire body taut, back arched up from the mattress, Ran dropped the phone. Calling helplessly, Yohji!’ Ran exploded another wordless cry ripped from his throat, ‘ahhh!’ he could do nothing but thrust fast and hard, once- twice-again, into his fist as each throbbing pulse burst from him. Finally, wracked by tremors, his thrusts slowed, and he fell back onto the bed, boneless, still feeling small aftershocks pulsing in his fist. Panting, his breath finally slowing, Ran came to himself slowly. He heard a small, tinnyvoice calling his name. The phone! Yohji! He fully intended to snatch the phone to his ear, but found he couldn’t. He slowly dragged his arm up, sweeping near the pillow to find the phone.


‘ – on Ran. Answer me baby, I’m getting worried here.’  Yohji’s voice was taking on a panicky tone.


‘Yohji?’ Ran mumbled.


‘Ran! Fuck!  You scared me. That, that was .... incredible. Are you okay Angel?’ Yohji asked, wishing so so much that he could be there to hold Ran, to feel Ran snuggled against him.


‘yeah.... Yohji’ Ran mumbled slowly in a breathless, half asleep voice. ‘that... that was .....nice.’ he sighed.


Yohji chuckled. ‘yes Ran, it really really was. Thank you Angel.’


‘happy birthday Yohji.’ Ran mumbled, sounding even more as though he were drifting off.


‘Ran? You ok babe? Falling asleep on me Angel?’ Yohji smiled, ‘it’s ok Ran. hang up Ran. I’ll text you tonight when we’re on our way home. If you’re awake you can call me back and we’ll talk then. I -’ Yohji cut off suddenly, then coughed a moment. ‘I’ll talk to you tonight or tomorrow Ran. Sleep for now, and dream of me.’


‘yes Yohji.’ Ran whispered now and Yohji knew he was asleep. He listened to Ran breath quietly for a few moments, reluctant to break the connection. ‘Sleep Ran.’ he whispered, ‘I love you.’  Finally, Yohji disconnected the call. Knowing sadly that soon the busy tone would wake Ran from his relaxed doze.  But, maybe it was best. Ran likely would need a bit of a clean up after that little work out.


Yohji got up from his bed and made his way to the shower. Yep, Ran would definitely be in need of a wash when he woke up if he’d cum anywhere near as hard as Yohji had. And, judging from the sound of things, he certainly had.... Too bad Yohji wasn’t there to take care of it for him, to clean him up and take Ran into his arms.... damn. Yohji decided he was definitely taking things to the next level, and soon. He wanted to hold Ran, to touch him.... he’d visited Ran’s apartment a few times now. It wouldn’t cause a stir for him to visit.... hmmm. Next weekend was labor day weekend. He already had the one surprise set up for Ran, may as well spring this too... hmmm... now, how to ... ah, he hadn’t taken Rand dancing yet. Concerned about public display, he had not been so bold. But, there was this small, quiet little backwater bar, up near the racetrack where Ran’s surprise was scheduled for next Saturday. They had the best crabcakes there, and being a small, quiet club, there was little chance anyone would recognize Ran there. Anyone who recognized Yohji knew him already and would make no comment or trouble.... yes, that would work wonderfully. WEISS had the weekend off, nothing scheduled, purposely. They all needed the break, and then, WEISS had their annual Labor day picnic planned that Monday.... yep, that’s the plan. Next weekend, he would make Ran his, then introduce him to the guys, and together they would work out some plan to help Ran escape Krittiker. They had to.....



Ran awoke to an annoying *banh banh banh banh* repeating in his ear. What the? Oh, the phone. Why is the phone off the hook?. He pulled the phone from his ear and hung up. Ran raised his head and suddenly was slammed with the memory. Oh. My. God. Yohji! He’d fallen asleep on Yohji, not really answering back after that.... that.... mind blowing orgasm.....damn. Ran sighed and climbed from the bed. Looking down in distaste at the pulling sensation of the dried cum splattered over his belly, Ran was assaulted by the smell and overwhelmed for a moment in the memory of Yohji’s voice calling out: *** ‘Ran, yes! Cum for me Ran, cum for me, calling my name, Ran.... oh! Damn!’ suddenly, Yohji gasped, then, ‘uh – R – Ran.’ Yohji’s voice, a drawn out growl....*** Ran felt a tightness grip his belly and his knees weakened for a moment.... He wanted that again, but live and in person.... he wanted to touch Yohji, to feel Yohji’s hands on his body.... Taking a deep breath, Ran stretched and made his way to the shower. He knew Yohji wanted him, but Yohji had this plan, this.... need to *do this right*. He would let Yohji set the timeline. Ran was already certain that his heart belonged to Yohji. It was only a matter of time before he gave his body to Yohji as well. He would let Yohji take things at a pace he was comfortable with. Whatever it took to bring Yohji to the conclusion that this was right, and that he belonged to Ran right back. Ran smiled. A full, open, content smile and climbed into the shower. Well, he would certainly rest well tonight. He was so relaxed right now he’d do well to get through the shower. His stomach rumbled and Ran promised himself a nice, juicy steak for Yohji’s birthday as soon as he was done here.




WEISS finally pulled into the parking lot late Sunday night. Very late. Tired, cranky over the flat tire on the way home, and definitely in need of a shower, Yohji helped Jei unpack the van as Omi went inside to help Ken clean out the gash on his arm. Ken had sliced him forearm pretty badly as he twisted the lugwrench and, though it likely needed stitches, Ken was stubborn like that and refused the hospital, insisting butterfly tape would handle it if only he could clean it out. Omi went in with him, mumbling about hardheaded, stubborn fools.


Yohji and Jei made their way inside, both overloaded with instruments and electrics, and dumped the lot in the music room in front.  ‘so Yohji,’ Jei said as he tossed Yohji a cold one from the fridge. You gonna see him tonight? You sounded pretty excited on the phone.’ Jei grinned as he took a swallow.


Yohji sighed, ‘I dunno Jei... it’s a lot later than I thought it would be, with the stupid tire, and he has to be at the office pretty early...’


‘Yohji. The man sounded pretty excited to see you too, from what I could hear. You don’t have to go out dancing or anything, just go over there, let him give the birthday present he was so disappointed he couldn’t give you and enjoy it.’ Jei tilted his head, studying Yohji for a moment. ‘Ya know. I was, skeptical at first, about this guy. I mean, such a .... class difference and all. I mean, I’ve never met him, I have no idea what he’s like but, I wondered... how it could really work, with him being on such a ... different level. And I thought you were crazy when you said the money didn’t matter to him, but... well, I’ve been watching you Yohji, and... you seem happy. Happier than I have seen you in a long, long time. I hope this works. Really. You deserve it man.’ He smiled. ‘So. Go. Go over there, right now, grungy and all, and let him see how you rushed to him, despite the damn tire fiasco, and let him give you the present, and whatever else he may want to give you too.’ Jei leered then, and laughed a quick laugh. ‘I’ll take care of the kid and Ken, you just drive careful.’ Jei pounded Yohji on the shoulder, turned him toward the door, and handed him the keys to the van as he gave him a push. ‘go Yohji.’ He shut the door behind Yohji as he shoved him out onto the step.


Yohji grinned, shook his head, and climbed into the van. Jei had deliberately left Yohji’s bag in the seat, a not so subtle hint, and given his ‘blessing’. Guess Yohji couldn’t ask for more than that.


Ran sat at his kitchen table, nursing a cup of tea, when his cell buzzed an incoming text:  **sorry I’m late. Had a flat tire. Am at red light on fulton. B there in a sec.** Ran smiled. Yohji was almost here. Feeling like a giddy schoolgirl, though he’d never, ever... ever, admit it, Ran jumped from his chair and made his way to the elevator. The overnight guard had not met Yohji and while Ran knew he had the description, there was less likely to be any scene if he just went outside to meet Yohji himself. Ran slipped on his sandals and entered the elevator.


As he exited into the lobby, Yohji was just entering the glass doors. Ran was suddenly glad he’d some downstairs. Yohji looked a mess. He looked exhausted. His jeans were muddy, he had a travel bag slung over one shoulder, and a nasty bruise on the left side of his face. ‘Yohji! What happened?!’ Ran couldn’t stop himself from rushing to Yohji’s side, but controlled himself before he pulled Yohji into his arms. No, that would not be a good idea. Not here. As if to bring the point home, before Yohji could answer they were interrupted by the guard. ‘Mr. Fujimiya? Is everything alright?’ 


Ran sighed, softly, gave Yohji a rueful smile, and turned. ‘yes Tim. Everything is fine. My friend, Mr. Kudoh, had some car trouble on his way back from a weekend trip and will be staying here tonight. Thank you Tim for your concern, Goodnight.’ Ran led Yohji into the elevator and waited until the doors closed before quickly turning to Yohji to stare intently at the bruise, assuring himself Yohji really was alright.


‘I’m fine Angel, really.’ Yohji assured, ‘I’ll explain everything upstairs. I’m really sorry we got back so late after I told you we’d be back for dinner. Really, Ran.’


‘ch! As if I care about that. It’s obvious something happened. I’m just glad you’re ok.’ Ran opened the apartment door, stepping aside to let Yohji enter, and noticed him limping lightly as well. ‘Yohji. You are not alright. Your txt said a flat tire. What the hell? How does a flat tire try to give you a black eye and ... twist your ankle? If I’m not mistaken.’


Yohji sighed and dropped his travel bag near the coat closet. ‘no, you’re not mistaken Ran. It’s a twisted ankle, but I’m ok. Just very tired.’


Yohji looked tired. Ran immediately regretted scolding him barely inside the door, ‘come on Nissho, let’s get you cleaned up. And you look like you could use a drink.’


‘Nissho? What?’ Yohji looked a little bewildered a he followed Ran to the kitchen table. Ran sat him down and pulled the chilled Reisling from the fridge. He poured Yohji a glass as he explained. ‘well, I ... I meant to tell you, yesterday when you called, that I’d found a name for you. A pet name.’ Ran blushed a little as he turned to sit the glass in front of Yohji. But then, um, I got.... distracted.’


‘distracted huh?’ Yohji grinned as he took a sip. ‘is that what you are calling it? I like ravished better.’ He smiled Ran’s special smile and Ran couldn’t resist. He leaned over and kissed Yohji. Slowly, languidly. He traced his tongue over Yohji’s lips and was rewarded when Yohji gasped, allowing him to enter Yohji’s mouth, chilled from the wine, tasting sweet.... Ran explored the kiss, keeping it slow, and drew back, taking Yohji’s lip between his teeth briefly before standing back up. Standing there, gazing down into that beautiful face, dazed green eyes watching him, wanting him despite the exhaustion he could see so clearly, Ran husked, ’Happy birthday Yohji. Welcome back.’


Yohji reached out, slowly pulling Ran into his lap. He let his head fall forward, forehead resting on Ran’s chest. ‘Damn Ran.... I am just so damn tired.... I’m a mess, I’m sore, I need a shower.... I want to....’ he sighed and raised his head to look at Ran. ‘I want to explore more of my gift from yesterday afternoon Ran.’ he grinned, but not as wide as normal, ‘but there is no way I can do any justice to it right now, just no way.’ His head dropped back down to Ran’s chest and Ran raised a hand to trail fingers through Yohji’s hair. ‘what did happen Yohji? There’s no way you’re so banged up from a flat tire. Were you guys mugged or in a wreck or something?’


Yohji chuckled darkly. ‘no Ran. It was flat tire. Just, a flat tire Ken Hidaka style.’


Ran pulled back to look at Yohji in confusion. ‘what? What does that mean?’


Yohji pushed Ran up, off his lap, and gasped as he did so, ‘Damn Ran, your pants! Shit. I forgot I was all muddy... fuck. Look, let me clean up a bit and I’ll explain everything, ok? I just dropped the guys off and booked over here. I didn’t even stop to change, as you can see. I’m sorry. I should have -’


‘No Yohji.’ Ran cut him off. ‘don’t be sorry. I’m glad you came straight away. And to hell with the mud. It’ll wash. I don’t care. I was.... was getting worried. Anyway, go on, jump in the shower real fast. There are towels in the linen closet there. Do you need sleep pants, or is there something in your bag?’ he stood up and stepped back so Yohji could stand.


Yohji stood, swaying just a bit, and went for his bag. ‘yeah, I’m all set. This is the spare bag, in case we had to stay over tonight. We all left one out after packing everything else up, just in case. We weren’t sure if we’d cut out tonight or in the morning. Since we got done so early, and I wanted to see you, we cut out tonight.’ Yohji ran his hand through his hair and sighed. ‘Guess we shoulda waited after all.’ He started down the hall, and heard Ran’s voice, low, behind him. ‘I’m glad you didn’t. Even with the flat tire, and whatever happened. I’m.... sorry you’re hurt Yohji but..... I’m glad you’re back more.’


Yohji turned to smile just before entering the bathroom, ‘me too Ran, me too.’


Yohji exited some twenty minutes later, refreshed. Still bone tired, but blessedly clean. He found Ran sitting on the sofa, a cup of tea before him and a water bottle with small plate of fruit, cheese, and a half sandwich on the table, next to an elegantly wrapped gift box of about the size of a football. Ran smiled at him and patted the sofa.  ‘alright Nissho, spill. Tell me what happened.’


‘There’s that Nissho again. What is that Ran?


Ran smiled again and Yohji sat down. ‘Nissho Yohji, sunshine. It came to me yesterday, just like you’d said it would. Suddenly, standing out on my balcony, basking in the sun, it hit me. You are a light in my darkness Yohji. Guiding me out. My sunshine.’ Ran blushed, ducking his head a moment. Yohji sat there, stunned, too tired to really reply, and Ran went on. ‘you warm me Yohji. Your voice fills me with light, and you, yourself..... looking at you is like.... seeing summer, embodied. Your hair, shining with the sun’s warmth, your beautiful eyes, glowing with summer’s vibrant green. You just... are sunshine. And.... I figured, you.... might not really like it if I went around calling you sunshine in front of people, but..... not many here know Japanese... so.... Nissho. Sunshine’ Ran looked up to find Yohji string at him in awe. ‘Yohji? Are you... alright?



‘Damn Ran.’ Yohji whispered, ‘you really meant it when you said you wrote poetry huh?’ he smiled the most amazing smile. It lit up his whole being, ‘Angel! That was..... incredible. Poetry... damn me.’ Ran blushed and Yohji softly leaned in for a very soft, very sweet kiss. ‘Ran, I love it. You amaze me constantly. No one has ever made me feel so cherished as you just did.... that was... beautiful.’


He sat back, slowly, trailing his thumb over Ran’s lips, and darted his eyes to the box. ‘So. Is this my other  birthday present?’ he waggled his eyebrows just a bit at Ran, just to catch that blush again. Rand didn’t disappoint. But, he didn’t let Yohji have the box, either.


‘no way Kudoh -’


‘Kudoh,’ Yohji whined, what happened to Nissho?’


‘It’s Kudoh until you tell me how the hell a flat tire punches you in the face.’


‘oh. I forgot that... well, Ken is..... well, he’s very athletic, and strong, and can be quite graceful, but... he’s a klutz when it comes to fixing anything. I shoulda known not to let him try to fix the damn tire, but he insisted, and he was the first one out there, tools and all. Everything was going great, but then the lugwrench slipped, cutting his arm open, and he jerked back. That’s when his elbow connected with my cheek and I let go of the spare. Which then began to roll down hill. Ken was bleeding everywhere, Jei was holding the jack, and Omi was running to the back of the van, the opposite direction, to find the first aide kit. This left me to chase the damn tire. It rolled off the edge of the road, right into a ditch. A ditch I didn’t see in the dark until I was in it.’ Yohji sighed, and sat back on the sofa, pouting a bit. He snagged the plate from the table and began to nibble. ‘thanks for the snack Ran’


‘I thought you might be hungry,’ Ran answered absently, as he digested the story. Slowly, he started to chuckle, and soon he was laughing. Not hard, not a loud laugh, but still... Yohji pouted bigger, and glared at Ran. ‘what the hell Ran? I’m injured here.’


Ran sobered a bit, but still chucking, he handed the gift box to Yohji. ‘Yohji, my poor  Nissho. You deserve your present after such a debacle’ he sobered, ‘I’m sorry Yohji, for laughing, but... what a tale. Are you sure you’re not hurt badly? And Ken. Is he ok?’


‘Yohji smiled ruefully. It was a total fiasco Ran. We laughed too, later, when we were almost home..... yeah, I’m fine. Like I said, just sore. My ankle isn’t even swollen, just twingy. And the face will not be pretty for a bit, but we have next weekend off, so that’s fine. Ken’s ok. Probably shoulda got stitches, but he is stubborn bastard, so probably bullied Omi into just the butterflies. I left while they were still arguing about it.’  Yohji pouted at Ran again, and deliberately made big, puppy eyes.  ‘Ran...Angel.’ he whined, ‘can I open my present now?  Please?’ 


Ran laughed again, a light, carefree laugh, surprising even himself for a moment. ‘yes Nissho. Open it.’


Yohji grinned and reached to rip the paper. He was stopped by a firm hand, and Ran’s solemn gaze. ‘carefully Yohji.’


Yohji sobered and placed the box on the table. With a glance at Ran, he carefully unwrapped the paper and opened the box. After moving the bunting away, he gingerly lifted the orchid from the foam cradle. ‘Ran’ he whispered, all teasing gone from his voice, a sense of awe about him. ‘Ran... it’s... it’s beautiful. How? Where?’


‘I went to the glass maker at the boardwalk shop that you like so much. He was eager to try such a challenging piece and agreed to create it. You like it then?’


‘like it?! Ran! It’s .... it’s.... I can’t even come up with a word for it....’ he very gently returned then orchid to it’s cradle, and turned take Ran in his arms. He was trembling, lightly from exhaustion and emotion, and Ran held him tightly. ‘come on Nissho. You need rest.’ Ran led Yohji to the bedroom. Yohji followed along, not even able to conjure a comment to show his surprise. He stared at the bed a moment and turned to Ran. ‘Ran’ he whispered, ‘are you sure?’


‘I’m sure Yohji, you’re too exhausted to drive anyway. Let’s just sleep. We can talk more tomorrow, after you’ve rested.’  He pushed Yohji into the bed, climbing in after him. He moved them about a bit until he had Yohji securely tucked up against his side, cradled in his arms. He tightened his hold, resting his cheek against Yohji’s head. ‘sleep Nissho. Sleep. Let me hold you, just for now.’


‘yes Ran.’ Yohji whispered as he fell into darkness, ‘hold me..........’



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